#2981 Below Deck S12E13: Derby or Not Derby

Summary

Podcast Summary: Watch What Crappens – Below Deck S12E13: Derby or Not Derby

Episode: #2981
Date: August 26, 2025
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam

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Overview

In this episode, Ben and Ronnie dive into "Below Deck" Season 12, Episode 13: "Derby or Not Derby." The discussion is filled with their signature playful banter, sharp observations, and critiques of the cast's messy antics. The hosts dissect crew drama, interpersonal conflicts, and themes of accountability, all set against a charter themed around the Kentucky Derby and a poignant guest cancer storyline.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Recap of Recent Appearances & Crossover Episodes

• (03:46–04:20): Ben and Ronnie highlight upcoming recaps (including Love Island's reunion and McBee Dynasty) and share excitement about their guest spots on podcasts such as Two Judgy Girls and Rachel Lindsay's Morally Corrupt.
• Ronnie: “Those Judgy Girls are classy…They sent a thank you thing, which we never do…They sent me Two Judgy Girls hats…” (06:34)

2. Early Banter: Tipping Culture and Hospitality

• (08:30–11:28): The hosts riff, in true Crappens spirit, over the expanding culture of tipping in America, with Ben questioning where the line is and Ronnie voicing mild boomer/Gen-X outrage.
  • Ronnie: "Now the restaurant wants a tip on top of the waiter tip? Go fuck yourself. Okay, this is getting out of control." (10:08)
  • Ben: “I tip the things that are classically tips…Like if you get takeout…” (11:28)

3. Crew Drama & Consequences of Their Actions

• Kyle’s Downward Spiral
  • (12:30–14:26): Kyle’s self-destructive behavior, excessive drinking, and tension with Fraser are examined. Rainbow pulls Kyle aside, warns him, and the hosts lambaste his "victim" narrative.
    • Ben: “You can’t act like an asshole…then act like a victim afterwards and say, ‘Oh wow, now Fraser’s pissed at me.’” (18:36)
• Jess and Fraser
  • (07:50–08:32): Jess faces the fallout of her messy crew hookups, alternative explanations for her actions (family cancer), and Fraser’s attempts at leadership.

4. The Rainbow/Damo/Dating Disasters

• Rainbow & Damo Kiss
  • (14:26–15:12): The hosts roast Damo’s “crispy tuna” energy, likening him to an appetizer no one wants.
    • Ronnie: “Damo’s the last crispy tuna…right now you’re really slimy and gross. And I’m just in it for the rice.” (14:29)
• Crew Makeouts Overload
  • (25:35–26:10): Both hosts express exhaustion at the surplus of crew romantic entanglements rather than yachting drama.
    • Ben: “I’m just sick of honestly Below Deck ogling at all these people making out…Let’s center the Windex. Let’s center the bad work ethic…” (26:01)

5. Rainbow vs. Celine: Tattling and Tension

• Workplace Grievances
  • (34:07–36:32): Rainbow/Fraser/Ben/crew all frustrated with Celine’s lack of work ethic, leading Rainbow to be an unapologetic tattletale—much to the co-hosts’ amusement.
    • Ronnie: “I don’t think anybody’s gonna give Celine worker of the year…It’s just funny watching Rainbow get so mad.” (36:20)

6. The Charter Guest: Cancer Survivor & Emotional Trigger

• (46:05–47:03): The primary guest, Emily, is celebrated for finishing chemo, which triggers strong emotions for Jess due to the loss of her grandparents to cancer.
  • Ben: “Jess tells a story about how…she lost them both to cancer. And…it was really rough stuff for her.” (46:33)
  • Ronnie: “Cancer is a real dick. My God. In a show where we like to make lots of jokes, I think everybody has been touched by cancer…and don’t love it.” (46:47)
• Hosts’ Commentary
  • Both Ben and Ronnie discuss how the show handles the guest’s battle with cancer and how Jess’s emotions might be less about trauma and more about feeling guilt from her actions.
    • Ben: “I think that’s really what’s motivating this…she likes to just do her thing. I think that’s what it is.” (54:52)
    • Ronnie: “[It’s] easier to be like, ‘Well, I’m crying for this other reason…I’m gonna use this other thing.’” (55:53)

7. Kentucky Derby Theme & Yacht Technicals

• (41:10–44:24): Preparation for a Kentucky Derby-themed charter is underway, along with stress over “Med Mooring,” a high-stakes yachting maneuver.
  • Ben: “They had a choice between going to the Kentucky Derby or going to a yacht and recreate the Kentucky Derby. So here we are having a stupid theme.” (41:10)

8. The Anchor Drama and Jess’s Meltdown

• (61:22–63:48): Jess mishandles the anchor, leading to a near-disaster, and is pulled aside by Captain Kerry for a firm but caring talk.
  • Ben (as Captain): “I’m doing something I don’t normally have to do. I’m gonna talk to this little lady in person…you balled it up.” (62:29)
  • Jess, emotionally: "I just think the whole guest of the chemo thing...it's hurting, it's hitting home a little bit. I don't think my head's been there." (63:48)

9. Interior Crew Explosion: Rainbow vs. Celine

• Climactic Confrontation
  • (77:10–79:13): Rainbow and Celine clash in the late-night pantry, trading barbs and escalating tension. Rainbow physically restrains herself, referencing childhood violence with her sisters.
    • Rainbow: “Do you ever think that when you hurt yourself, this is karma? Just. Only a baby. Just. Yeah. So, you know, because you over your teammates every day, that’s fine. Whoa.” (77:44)
    • Celine: "Nice conversation, vagina bush." (79:13)
    • The hosts crack up over “beast of vagina bush,” a phrase lost in translation.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You can’t act like an asshole and then act like a victim afterwards… Like, I’m not going to feel sad for you.” – Ben (18:36)
• “Damo’s the last crispy tuna…right now, you’re really slimy and gross.” – Ronnie (14:29)
• “Let’s center the Windex. Let’s center the bad work ethic. Let’s center, like, the rags…” – Ben (26:01)
• “How is Vegemite not caught on everywhere? That’s my question. Let me tell you who the real failure is here today, Jess. Besides you. I mean you. But the biggest failure here, Vegemite.” – Ronnie (64:32)
• “I want my own M&Ms.” – Ben, after hearing about podcast guest gifts (07:23)
• “She is the worst kind of person. She is the worst person you could ever imagine… I don’t have any part of me that has any hate.” – Ben, channeling Rainbow (68:13–68:56)
• “Beast of vagina bush.” – Rainbow/Celine, causing laughter at bizarre insults (78:15–78:20)

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Important Timestamps

• 08:30 – Deep-dive into tipping culture rant
• 12:30–14:26 – Kyle’s drinking and confrontation with Rainbow
• 25:35–26:10 – Hosts’ exhaustion over crew makeouts
• 34:07–36:32 – Rainbow tattles on Celine to Fraser
• 46:05–47:03 – Introduction of cancer survivor charter guest and Jess’s emotional connection
• 61:22–63:48 – Jess mishandles anchor; Captain Kerry’s intervention
• 77:10–79:13 – Rainbow and Celine’s explosive fight

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Tone & Language

• Tone: Irreverent, playful, and deeply Bravo-obsessed. Hosts balance genuine emotional insights with snark and over-the-top dramatization mirroring “Below Deck.”
• Language: Largely informal; loaded with witty analogies, impression-heavy skits, and classic Crappens improv.

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Episode Flow

1. Intro/Appreciation for Guests on Other Pods
2. Below Deck Recap Begins: Tipping Tangent
3. Crew Mess: Kyle’s Downfall, Jess & Fraser's Leadership
4. Food Analogies & Appetizer Banter
5. Romantic Plotlines: Overload and Cynicism
6. Cancer Survivor Guest Story & Emotional Impact
7. Workplace Politics & Snitching
8. Technical Yachting Mishaps
9. Kitchen, Charter Events, & Dinner Service
10. Explosive Interpersonal Blow-Up
11. End with Signature Sponsors Rollcall

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For Newcomers

This summary covers the heart of the episode while skipping over ads/marketing, sponsor shoutouts or non-content sections. Ben and Ronnie’s comedic take on "Below Deck" S12E13 provides laughs, Bravo insights, and scathing (but affectionate) commentary on the crew’s ridiculous antics, the recurring theme of “consequences,” and, as always, plenty of shade for the messiest yachties on Bravo.

Transcript

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[Ben Handelker]

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[Ben Handelker]

Learn [e-mail] or contact your travel advisor. Who cares what happens when there's so much crappens? Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens? Hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens. A podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Handelker and joining me today is the one and only, the wonderful and beautiful and fantastic and special Ronnie Caram. Hello.

[Ronnie Caram]

How you doing today?

[Ben Handelker]

I am doing just great. We have so much to to get into over the course of the next few days in this podcast because today we're doing below deck. We've got some McBee dynasty coming up. We are going to be on our patreon patreon.com watch for cr happens big bonus episode action is going to be happening because we will be doing our recap take on the Love island reunion which was quite, quite exciting. And we got long. It was quite long and crackers if.

[Ronnie Caram]

I have to hear stand on business one more time. And guess what? None of them did stand on business. My God, you bunch of wussy ass. I can't wait to talk about that today.

[Ben Handelker]

Here's what 95% of that reunion was, was hood of saying, oh my God. I mean like I fudgeing love. I fucking love her. I fucking love her. And I love what you're doing and like I fucking love you. And like I thought about a lot and I was fucking angry but like, I fucking love you now, man. I fucking love you, bro. And I'm just like so proud of you, bro. I'm just so proud of you. I fucking love you, bro.

[Ronnie Caram]

Who does I have to say? What a sicko that woman is. Like really, there were, there were so many moments the season where you cheer for her, you know, because like she's getting better and now she's being, you know, they're being mean to her and stuff. So I went through so many emotions with Huda through the whole season, but this one, oh my God, they're like, she's, they're like, huda, you know, we deserve an apology. She's like, okay, I Forgive you. Like, what? You're. And she's like, but you're the one who is, like, liking posts with my face on George Floyd's body. Like, what are you doing? And she's like, I forgive you. It's okay. I love you. I love you. I was like, this woman's psycho. This woman is a psychopath.

[Ben Handelker]

I would comment more on Huda, but unfortunately legal tells me I'm not allowed to. Sorry, Ronnie.

[Ronnie Caram]

Netflix is like, can't comment on that. You better do your below deck recap. You're both getting sued.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, so we haven't recorded that yet, but that's going to be an undertaking and we're excited for it. Also, some fun stuff, Ronnie and I. You know, I don't know if anyone in the audience has ever seen beavers, but we are two beavers. Busy beavers, if you will, because we've been making some rounds. Ronnie was on to Judgy Girls last week. I was then on episodes that they released yesterday and today. I was also today, I believe, airing today Rachel Lindsay's podcast, the Morally, Morally corrupt Rachel Lindsay. We love Rachel Lindsay. We're definitely going to have to have her on to Crappy Hour. I was able to guess on that. And then later this week, I will also be on Keep It. So go support women who support other women. Okay. Go listen to those podcasts and give them a listen, give them a subscribe and. And. And join their fan bases, et cetera. So thanks to everyone who's been having both of us on to their shows.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes. Good times. I mean, those judgy girls are classy. Like, they're classy girls. Like, they sent a thank you thing, which we never do when people guest with us, but they sent me a thank you thing with my Two Judgy Girls hats. Okay, So I have this now. Two Judgy Girls. I'm going to wear it everywhere I go to find other judgies out in the wild.

[Ben Handelker]

The judges.

[Ronnie Caram]

The judges, Tamara judges, they have their own candy. Like, they took a Sour Patch and they made their own wrapper that says Two Judgy Girls. Like, it's full on. Obviously, I didn't really realize it. I ripped into it. I was so excited to get Sour Patch Kids and they just put the Sour Patch Kids in their own packaging. I mean, that's some classy shit. You know what you get when you guest on our show? Maybe a thank you text. We're like, thank you.

[Ben Handelker]

We're going to have to up our game now.

[Ronnie Caram]

Wow.

[Ben Handelker]

Okay.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I want My own M&MS.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, we had a lot of fun on all those shows. So go check those out. But today is below deck day and it was a very exciting episode because it was another episode where. Where good old Jess had to deal with the consequences of her actions.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I'm having to deal with the consequences of my actions. I'll bring up family cancer because there's a cancer person on boat to get out of there. Wait a minute. That's the consequences of my actions. Jess and Fraser, I will not stand for this one more second. I will tell Silane everything dirty thing I've ever thought of. Celine, darling, could you please like, clean more? Thank you. Like, you tell her. You tell her. Fraser.

[Ben Handelker]

He really laid down the law. He really laid down the law.

[Ronnie Caram]

He laid down the Jude Law. It was just like, hello, can we have a talk? Yeah. So below.

[Ben Handelker]

Don't do that. Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Season 12 Episode 13 Talk Derby to Me. You know this. They dress like horses and run around like they're in a derby. And I thought, could you not do that last week when you guys were stuck on the boat with those cheapos? Oh, by the way, I found out what restaurants that guy when he's like, sorry we didn't tip you, but we're in hospitality Qdoba.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

And you don't get to brag about being in hospitality when you own some Qdobas, sir.

[Ben Handelker]

Okay.

[Ronnie Caram]

Because I've seen the hospitality at Qdoba and I don't even think they let me have free refills on my diet Coke over there with a self serve machine, if I recall correctly.

[Ben Handelker]

Do they even allow their servers to get tipped? I mean, I haven't been to a Qdoba, but like, I haven't been to Dave's Hot Chicken in a while. But like, do they have it if you buy from Dave's Hot Chicken, that there's like a thing where you can say, enter in a tip. Like. So here he is talking about, like hospitality and like, do they actually provide the avenues for people to give gratuity to their employees? Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

He's like, I know how yacht service could be because I have a Qdoba. So.

[Ben Handelker]

Okay, I have a restaurant that Shina Shea went to once in West Covina. Okay, So I understand hospitality.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. But also, yeah, you can probably tip because they want tips now for like literally every single thing. Like, I bought. What did I buy? I went to the tailor, okay? The tailor to get my pants clipped or whatever, to get my pants circumcised. And they have A tip thing in that I'm like, but I'm paying you to do the thing. You want to tip. You're the one doing the thing. It's already 30 bucks a pair. So tip him. And then what's the other thing I went to the other day that they.

[Ben Handelker]

Were, I went to the, I mean, I went to the doctor, I went.

[Ronnie Caram]

To the mountains, I climbed a mountain. And the mountain was like, are you going to tip this mountain? Or even when you order doordash now you tip, obviously you tip the doordash person. That's normal. But now they have a thing that says, would you like to give $5 to the restaurant? No. They're already up charging me 30% to order from the restaurant in the first place. And now the restaurant wants a tip on top of the waiter tip. Go fuck yourself. Okay, this is getting out of control. And I'm a waiter, I believe in tips, but not for the car, you know, not for everything. Like, I just did your oil. I did your oil change. You want to tip? No, you, I paid you to do the oil.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, let me keep my money. Especially when the tipping doesn't seem to have any sort of impact in quality of service.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'd like to add in what kind.

[Ben Handelker]

Of the whole, the quality. Like they all, I think the idea is that like it's to motivate people to provide better service to that, to be better employees, like better public facing employees. So that way you get a tip. But like people don't act like that necessarily. And then you still have to tip them, you know, And I will, I still do tip them, you know, I.

[Ronnie Caram]

Feel like they're tricking me into like sounding like a boomer. Like, oh, tipping, tipping that. Because of course I believe in tipping culture. I've made my living off tipping culture. But not for every little thing. You guys, come on, stop it now.

[Ben Handelker]

I tip the things that are classically tips, things that you tip. Like what? I don't like. I feel like if you get takeout, if you go to a restaurant, get takeout. That's not supposed to be a tip. Right, right. Like because you're like, well, I still.

[Ronnie Caram]

Take out, I still tip. I'm just not like, you know, maybe not 30%. Whatever. I would not, I mean, I, I.

[Ben Handelker]

I tip, like usually anytime it shows up because I just feel guilty, but I feel, I get mad. I think there's things that are not, not.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I tip whenever it comes up too. I, I complain about it to you. But if there's someone, if like the street sweeper passes by and he's like, me, a tip. I'm like, sure, here you go. I'm never gonna say no because I feel like that's terrible karma and like if that's what we do now, that's what we do. I'm. It's just like some things, you know, it's like a person, it just feels like it's like the 7 11. Do you have to tip the 7 11? Next? Like, come on, leave me alone. Just leave me alone. Let me keep my damn money, you guys. Everything's so expensive anyway, by the way, join our patreon. Okay, so I know I'm about to.

[Ben Handelker]

Say we're talking about like tip jars.

[Ronnie Caram]

Nice hypocritical opening to the show. So anyway, talk derby to me. So for those of you who forgot, Kyle stuck his wiener into a lady from Mob Wives and then went around bragging about it and getting shit faced to the point where he's like shaky and meth looking and still has a red nose two days later. So that's where we're at with Kyle. And it's that.

[Ben Handelker]

It'S. It's not only sad, it's also like not terribly interesting at this point either. It's just kind of like he's just drunk and he's annoying and so Rainbow has pulled him aside and she's. She's basically like, you're making a lot of self destructive decisions and Kyle's like, here. I know, I know I am. And who goes like, you're going down a path that you don't need to go on. And as your supervisor, I'm gonna do absolutely nothing about it. Well, I know, but I'm not looking for a lecture. I understand these are the consequences of my actions. I've heard.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, wait a minute. Did someone say consequences? So Damos like his jobs at stake. The reputation of the captain of the boat is at stake. Who's going to tip the captain? That's on him. Grow up. You're an adult. You're an adult. So Damos over it, you guys. And I like Rainbow, she's just like, listen, you're being really self destructive. If you want to hit somebody, hit my sisters.

[Ben Handelker]

I know. Yeah. So then they like go to party and everything and Demo Damon Rainbow are being sort of flirtatious. I mean like, guys, it's episode. It's like episode 45. There's not much time left. You guys gotta hook up or whatever. So he's like, oh, you're grabbing my ass. She Goes, no, no. Oh, it must be someone else, because. No, I generally don't think it is. Because, like, I would love to grab your arm sometimes if it's like, I would actually choose arm over ass. So it's like, well, like, Rainbow, he's trying to flirt with you. Can you try to flirt back?

[Ronnie Caram]

She's like, she does try.

[Ben Handelker]

Not me.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, she does try. But Damo is kind of like. He's like a tray of crispy tuna appetizers that have been passed around already to the whole party. And you know how it's, like, really hard to get those with your fingers? And so everybody's kind of touched every other piece on the thing with part of their finger because they're just trying to get in there. And then by the time it gets to you, it's just, you know, there's, like, fingerprints and, like, other DNA all over it. Like, no one wants the last crispy tuna. And I feel like, damos, the last crispy tuna. You know, like, you should have served yourself earlier, because right now you're really slimy and gross. And I'm really in it just for the rice part. Anyway. Get out of here, Damo, you disgusting hooker of a man.

[Ben Handelker]

That being said, I've never turned down the crispy rice tuna.

[Ronnie Caram]

I have eaten the last bite of crispy tuna so many times.

[Ben Handelker]

But of course, I also strategically place myself where the caterers come out. And so I usually get them when they are fresh as well.

[Ronnie Caram]

I have been the caterer. So I walk away, and I'm like, no one wanted this last piece of crispy tuna or eat it. Like, somehow I was the one who always made it back with at least, like, one or two pieces left on the tray.

[Ben Handelker]

Like, whoops, I'm the one. I'm the one the cater waiter always gives that weird look to because they know that they can. Like, they can come to me and I'll finish off their tray. They always come up to me and they give that look. They go. They do that nod like, you want it, huh? You want it? They're like peddling drugs. They get so happy. They get so happy because they know they've got your number. And, like, you're the one. You're the one I'm gonna go to. Like, one more egg roll. You want this? And I'm like, well, I really have to save some space. And they do that nod again like. Like, we know you're gonna eat it. I'm like, well, I guess I will have it. I guess I can't Help it.

[Ronnie Caram]

You know you want it. And actually, you're our biggest help. Because when we go out there, if you go back to the kitchen and you still have stuff on there, they're like, ronnie could maybe stop. Stop talking so much. And actually. So you look bad if you walk back with stuff left on your tray. So it's good to know the bends. The bends and the rod.

[Ben Handelker]

I don't know how they. I don't know how they know, like, to always come to me. I wonder if it's because when they come by with, like, their spanakopitas, I take like, three at a time, and I say, hold on, hold on, hold on.

[Ronnie Caram]

And you start pulling out paper towels from your pocket. You're like, okay, I got this. There's some Ziplocs.

[Ben Handelker]

That's the guy.

[Ronnie Caram]

Also, you're not very subtle, I have to say. I've been with you at Trey passing things. And you really. You do this thing when you get excited. I don't know how to explain it, but, like, you stand up differently and you start moving around a little bit.

[Ben Handelker]

Like, I'm like a chicken. Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

You start doing this thing with your head where you're, like, pretending you're looking around, but you're really not. It's, like, pretty obvious. You're like a buoy in a water. And the water just started getting rumbly, and you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. There's sabotages here.

[Ben Handelker]

Where's that appetizer? I get very music happy. You really do do that. I get into, like, survival mode. I get into survival mode. I'm like, if I don't get that appetizer, I may never get an appetizer. I may never get an hors d'.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oeuvre.

[Ben Handelker]

And, like, they're not coming over here. Why are they not coming over here like.

[Ronnie Caram]

Or why are.

[Ben Handelker]

Why? Like, they're not doing their job properly. They need to come over here. Like, we're part of the party. Why are we not not being included? Why are we not part of this party? Like, are we lesser than? Are we not? Are we not important? Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Kyle is. Let's see. So Kyle's upset because he's being lectured by everybody, but rightfully so, because I don't think Kyle has really even truly sobered up because he's just been wasted. Now he's wasted again. And so Anthony and Kyle. And also he's just been mean to Fraser in front of everybody, right? So now they're at the bar, he's with Anthony, and he's like, I'm out. And don't. Fraser doesn't even like me now, so he's like, oh, I love you. Don't worry. You know, I never argue with Fraser. We argue all the time. You think I never argue? I do it all the time with Fraser. You want a towel? You throw a towel. Throw a towel, bro. Throw a towel.

[Ben Handelker]

It feels really good. So I was like, I'm fucking hurt and pissed off, and now fucking Fraser is pissed off with me. I'll probably fucking ruin that friendship there. And I was just kind of taking the piss, so I feel really disappointed in myself. Okay, two things you can't keep saying you're taking the piss, okay?

[Ronnie Caram]

It's.

[Ben Handelker]

It's like you cannot do. You cannot act like an asshole and be a dick and be stupid and irresponsible and then just be like, oh, just taking the piss. No, it's over. Like, it's too much. And also, you can't act like a dick and an asshole and irresponsible and then act like a victim afterwards and say, oh, wow, now Fraser's pissed at me. I'm like, yeah, because you're being dumb. Stop acting like that and people won't be mad at you. Like, I'm not going to feel sad for you because you got wasted again and you went after someone who was trying to help you. Like, I'm sorry, I'm just not going to feel that.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I won't go as far as to say Fraser was trying to help him, but I agree with you. Like, you, you publicly, like, you tried to start with him at a dinner, people.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, but I said help him as in like, like, as in like be friendly with him. That's what I really meant. Like someone sort of. Sort of on his side at least.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, you had someone who was. Listen, Fraser loves to go tattletail on people, so the fact that he made someone else do it for him was, I thought, pretty, Pretty funny. Like, for Fraser, that's an olive branch, I think. Yeah. Fraser's like, I'm sick of being villainized. So he, you know, he's just done that whole thing. So then Hugo pulls aside Fraser and he's like, someone in my team is catastrophically spiraling into his own abyss. I think you can see that. Okay, you're not really wrong, but that's your job as a head of department. And also, stop being a dick to everybody on the boat. Hugo really lost me this past couple of up. I mean, he never really had me, but.

[Ben Handelker]

No, but he's been really, he's been really shitty. And yeah, it's like, it's your job.

[Ronnie Caram]

Because he was like a Jehovah's Witness. Like, he grew up as a Jehovah's Witness and he left the church. And part of me is just so thankful that he's not going to be knocking on my door because, listen, as Christians, we had to do that as kids too. Like, my dad made us do that and it was horrifying. And then whenever somebody did it to me, I was like, this is how people feel when we do it. And I have to leave. I have to leave the church. So, like, I kind of got him in that. And I was also so thankful that no one was loitering at my house. So he kind of had me in that way. But then he lost me.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, hand the man some pamphlets because, like, I'm sick of listening to him.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, yeah. I'm done with Hugo as well. So he goes, he's trying to get Fraser to basically fix this. And Fraser is like, he's like, well, you know, he's not himself because he's been told by Captain that he can't assimilate with guests. But I know him, he's got an amazing heart. And tonight he was an idiot. Also, not only does he have an amazing heart, he also has very black lungs. I'm very concerned about him, but I also know that there are reasons for that.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then he has an amazing heart. His kidneys are on crutches, but his liver, his heart's doing good.

[Ben Handelker]

The liver looks a bit like Swiss cheese. Probably smells like that too.

[Ronnie Caram]

He actually should take some piss and put it in his own body because his own is coming out as refined oil. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

[Ben Handelker]

We are sponsored by the new movie from Searchlight Pictures. The Roses.

[Ronnie Caram]

Perfect couple. Ivy, Olivia Colman and Theo Rose. Benedict Cumberbatch have it all. Successful careers, a loving marriage and great kids. But when Theo's career comes crashing down, just as Ivy's fame starts to skyrocket, a tinderbox of fierce competition and growing resentment ignites, threatening to destroy everything they've built if they don't destroy each other first.

[Ben Handelker]

All's fair when love is war for.

[Ronnie Caram]

Anyone who's ever been in a relationship, the Roses is a crowd pleasing comedy.

[Ben Handelker]

Starring Benedict Cumberbatch, Olivia Colman, Andy Samberg, Allison, Janney Tsuti gatwa and Kate McKinnon.

[Ronnie Caram]

From the director of Meet the Parents and Writer of Poor Things, directed by.

[Ben Handelker]

Jay Roach and screenplay by Tony McNamara.

[Ronnie Caram]

This movie looks absolutely hilarious. I love Olivia Colman so much. I'll see anything she's in. And this one looks like a home run. In theaters everywhere August 29th. Get tickets now. Searching for a romantic summer getaway escape with Rich Girl Summer, the new Audible original from Lily Chiu.

[Ben Handelker]

The exquisitely talented Philippa sue returning to narrate her father fifth Lily Chew title.

[Ronnie Caram]

This time Philippa is joined by her real life husband, Steven Pasquale from Rescue Me and American Son.

[Ben Handelker]

Set in Toronto's wealthy cottage country, AKA the Hamptons of Canada, Rich Girl Summer follows the story of Valerie, a down on her luck event planner posing as a socialite's long lost daughter while piecing together the secrets surrounding a mysterious family and falling deeper and deeper in love with the impossibly hard to read and invite. Infuriatingly handsome family assistant, Nico.

[Ronnie Caram]

Caught between pretending to belong and unexpectedly finding where she truly fits in, Valerie learns her summer is about to get far more complicated than she ever planned. She's in over her head and head over heels.

[Ben Handelker]

Fake heiress, real secrets.

[Ronnie Caram]

Listen to Rich Girl Summer now on audible. Go to audible.com. richgirl summer.

[Ben Handelker]

So then Hugo and Fraser go to Kyle, who's sitting on the sofa, and. And Kyle's like, I'm sorry, by the way. I'm sorry, man. The idea of hurting you, the idea of being incorrect in how I'm saying things, and now Fraser's being conciliatory. He's like, it happens. He's like, oh, no, no, I know it does, but that's hitting me to pieces. Like, sorry, bro, you just did this five seconds ago. Like, I don't know. I just don't have any patience for this. Like, you're too old to do this. At least your face is.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I. Yeah, the drunken crying is not my favorite with him.

[Ben Handelker]

But you, like, also, like, I don't know. But like, you also like, attacked your friend in front of everyone and now he has to come and he has to console you because you feel bad about how you acted. I'm sorry. Like, if you're really holding that up. Yeah, he really is. And like, he's sitting here acting. He's like, I can't talk about this anymore, Netflix. But like, you're sitting here talking about how you feel bad about Fraser, but you don't actually get up and do anything and go over to him and apologize. He has to come over to you. I'm sorry. Like, this guy's a It's official.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I'm Fraser's. Like, you're a beautiful, beautiful human being.

[Ben Handelker]

I love you, man. I love you, man.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then it's time to go back to the yacht. Jess and Barbara are making out more, which also, I'm kind of sick of. Like, great, you're happy. Okay. Go be happy behind closed doors. You know, everyone's always telling gay people, do what you want in your own bedroom, but I don't want to hear about it. Well, you know, I feel that. Well, I guess they are gay, so I shouldn't say that. I feel that way with people who are in, like, love, you know? Like, I'm so glad you guys are in love. Save it for Facebook. You know what I mean? Save it for your yearly oh, my God, and I married my best friend. Save it for that post. Because, like, I'm literally sick of it. I'm busy.

[Ben Handelker]

I'm just. I'm just sick of honestly, below deck, like, ogling at all these people making out. Like, we get it. They're making out. I just. This is too much. It's too much, like, I wanna make.

[Ronnie Caram]

Her next to me in a car.

[Ben Handelker]

It's just like, we're supposed to care about this. Like, look at this crew. They're so messy. They're all making out with each other. And I'm like, that's fine. I'll take some of that. But, like, do we have to center it on this show?

[Ronnie Caram]

Let's.

[Ben Handelker]

Let's center the Windex. Let's center the bad work ethic. Let's center, like, the rags and. And, like, the wiping down the toilets. Like, that's what I'm here for.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, me too. I'm not here to watch maids make out. Especially, like, right next to me. I mean, we can say a lot about Kyle, but at least he's fucking someone in the bathroom. Like, that's a person with manners.

[Ben Handelker]

You're right. You're right, you're right.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then Rainbow starts making out with Damo, which I don't know why anybody would make out with Damo, because that guy's nasty. And she does. And she's like, if you want to know how Damo kisses, make out with the fish, because, you know, it's, like, really wet.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Make out with the fish. So.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then Kyle, I think, does she like it?

[Ben Handelker]

You know, she's horny. She's horny. It's. It's. She's had a tough season and she's all horned up. And then speaking of horny, Kyle and Selene. So now, even though they've been both shitty to each other, they also have isolated everyone around them. So they just have each other to sleep with now. So that's what they're going to do. Kyle's like, can we just fuck? She goes, shut up.

[Ronnie Caram]

And.

[Ben Handelker]

But they are going to go ultimately and have sex.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So Hugo is like, is it a problem with Jess and Barbara? And so then goes, oh, well, you know, you fucked up with me. You messed up with me, you know. And Fraser says, well, when you left Stilly to go with Jess with. Without telling him and like, trying to figure out Selene's love rhombus or whatever we're calling it. And Kyle's like, for jumping from person to person and hurting feelings and then going back to the original one, which is Kyle.

[Ben Handelker]

And well, but also she's acting mad at like, Jess. She's like, oh my God, like, I can't. I'm so mad at Jess because, like, oh, so you just like, you mess with me and then you just like, leave me and you just go to Barbara. Barbara. And he's like, but yes, but you did that with Stilly for Jessica. She's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's not about you guys. No, it's not that. So they basically bust her. Busted. So then they get back to the yacht and Jess asks Rainbow if. If she can have Barbara over in the cabin. And then Rainbow goes to sleep in the crew mass. And then Kyle and Celine go to sleep in the guest cabin. And it's another night of the crew that comes to an end.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes. Announced 32 hours until charter the next morning. And Jess is like, what did you do last night? That I don't know. A friend. Bl. And she's like, oh my God, I made out with Damo in the back of an Uber. It was amazing. I've already sent my sister a closed fist in the mail and said, stay the away from my man, bitch, or you're getting a piece of this. Okay.

[Ben Handelker]

You know, the last thing I wanted was like, for Damo to show up and be like, come into bed with me. And I'd be like, no, because your bed is a gross place. And like, I don't want to be there. Oh my God, I love being in a showmance. So then Kyle calls his mom because it's like he always has to call his mom or his grandma for them to say, don't worry, you're still a good little boy. So she's like, But I love that.

[Ronnie Caram]

They all know his. They all have his. Immediately off the bat, I see. I got drunk and acted like a goddamn idiot again, eh, Cal?

[Ben Handelker]

I've not really done anything. I just drank. They're all fucking winding me up about drinking. And I did have a lot to drink last night. So that did happen.

[Ronnie Caram]

Ah, let me get it. Say you're drinking too much, saying stuff that you shouldn't be saying. Did you fuck another goat in the stables again? Little the girl in the bathroom. Ah, well, at least you're. You're growing. You're growing. At least the goat was safe this time. Still very upset with you, Mom. I can't take it from you, too.

[Ben Handelker]

So then we see him, his arms crossed, his interview again. And he's like, sort of like doing the thing where he's scratching his nose, the side of his nose with his thumb and looking down at, like, the floor. And he's like, well, as much as my night ended great. I'm definitely not happy with how I've been in recently. And I really thought I was better than this, but I'm not. So I really do need to change. And I'll change by changing brands of Scotch. That's what I'll do. I think with a different brand, I'll behave better. That's it.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Damo sees Rainbow and he's like, where'd you sleep last night? Please stop doing the fish thing. No more fish Faith. I knew I should have gone on an Easter egg hunt and looked for my little rain Beeja.

[Ben Handelker]

So then, big news. The wings. The wing station controller will be delivered shortly. To think about the parts.

[Ronnie Caram]

Captain, Captain Marina. Captain, Captain Marina. Hi. This is the marina attendant. Your wing controllers on the way, stud. Adventure. All right, the parts here. If it works, this guy here is going to be a happy little Vegemite. All right.

[Ben Handelker]

Doesn't really make sense because Vegemite is just like a spread you put on toast. So it's weird to assign any sort of emotional state to that Vegemite. But I did it because I'm on a verbal adventure. But I haven't seen it yet. The part could be wrong. It might be programmed, it might not be programmed properly. It might be a shark. Who knows what it is? But if that happens, we've got much bigger problems ahead of us. We can't run a charter season from the dock, especially if we've installed a shark onto our yacht.

[Ronnie Caram]

Shark. So now, deck wash up time. And he goes like, wow, my guy. Damo. I had front seats to your Makeout session in the car. Wow.

[Ben Handelker]

Wow.

[Ronnie Caram]

Great times. And Damo's like, did it look as bad as I remember it feeling? I just don't really think anyone's a bad kisser. I just think that sometimes two people don't have the same styles. You know what I mean? I like to really get my lips wet. And then I like to chill them a bit, like the rim of a martini glass, you know, and just like, kind of ice them up. I like a cold that point my tongue kind of like a. A stick. And I like to wetly poke the other person's face. You know, not everyone's really into that.

[Ben Handelker]

He goes like, yeah. And he's like, but the good part is my Brazilian girlfriend taught me how to kiss, so I've always taken that with me. And, like, I don't remember if they gave him a huts, but I feel like they did since Rainbow said he kissed like a fish. Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

And it seems like he knows it because he actually. I was just kind of kidding about his lines that he said. But now that I look at it, there's someone in the world that likes the pointy, tonguey, windmilly, swish, wish, swish, wash. Like, it's horrible. And somebody's got to like the fish as well. So he knows he kisses like that.

[Ben Handelker]

I guess so. But then they start talking about, well.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm sorry, but he blames it on his br. He says he has a Brazilian girlfriend that taught him to kiss like that. But I've kissed plenty of Brazilian people and they do not kiss like, they're actually very good kissers. I mean, in my. In my experience. Have I just experienced it wrong? Did I miss the chilled tongue poking me in the face?

[Ben Handelker]

Maybe you like a fish kiss. I don't know. I don't think. I don't think that Damo realizes that he's the fish. I think he's just saying.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, you think he's saying that she's. And I think she's that way. Yeah.

[Ben Handelker]

I think he's actually bragging. He's like, I was taught by a Brazilian how to kiss. So that's like. Like, I know. I think he's sort of saying, like, yeah, I've always taken that with me because I learned from. From a Brazilian, you know.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh. So some people kiss like fish and some people don't. But he's saying that she's the one that kisses like a fish.

[Ben Handelker]

I think. I think that's the implication because I think he definitely got, like, some sort of on that one.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, they definitely. You could tell it was a bad kiss as they were kissing because it was uncomfortable to watch, you know. Really was like, oh, that looks like a cold kiss. Like literally cold.

[Ben Handelker]

It was, yeah, I didn't look good. So then they talk about stilly and so, so sleeping and that's fun. And then it's the morning and then like later on it's like 10:30am and like the, the guests will be arriving in two hours and Celine is just eating cereal and Rainbow is now just. She's given up trying to be like a productive co worker. She's now just like a tattletaler. So she's like, she goes up to Fraser and she's like, hey, Fraser, did you tell Solene she could have her breakfast break early? He's like, no, she's having breakfast. Yeah, she's sitting in the crewmast eating a bowl of cereal. I think it was special. Okay. It could have been cornflakes, I don't know. I will do more reporting later. Did you say she could eat cornflakes? Because is there a cornflakes exception? She's eating cornflakes. I'm actually pretty sure it's cornflakes. And she's chatting with Barbara too, who's folding clothes. Yeah, all sorts of clothes. Big clothes, little clothes. I can paint the whole picture of you, Frasier. He's like, okay, thank you. It's another day in paradise. I will absolutely go reprimand her right now. Watch, everyone. Watch and learn. You're about to get Frasier. We're not doing breakfast break. Oh, wow, that was rough. Rough on her. Do you need a tissue? Wipe away the tears from that verbal lashing you just received from me.

[Ronnie Caram]

And Rainbow's like solane, bro. The worst type of person. The worst type of person. Fiverr in the morning. Stupid. Watching Rainbow just incrementally get more angry is so hilarious because, like, really for Celine. Celine, I don't think anybody's gonna give Celine, like worker of the year. But like, we've seen Celine improve. Like, she's learned how to do things. So it's the worst that she's eating a bowl. Not saying that her eating the cereal is right or anything. It's just funny watching Rainbow get so mad. She's just pushed to the point now where she's just like, I saw that girl put something on a hanger. Put it on the thing when she was supposed to be holding an eye. Fraser, just get rid of that bitch before I beat her.

[Ben Handelker]

She hates. She hates her so much. Like, just so much so. I personally love Rainbow. Being at this point, just being just totally infuriated. Me too.

[Ronnie Caram]

This is Rainbow I need.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah. Like, I don't normally love someone who's just so tattly, but I also feel like she's earned it. She's earned the tattles. She's had to deal with Solan for so long. So now the crew, the.

[Ronnie Caram]

The.

[Ben Handelker]

The nameless crew workers are putting on this. They're working on this control station. Let's see if this part works. And then Jess is talking to Solene because Solane. Selene wants to talk with Jess to clear the air finally. So Slain's like, so I think it is time to talk. Like, we had. We had, like, something, and like, now you're like, okay, it's juice. And like, you, like, you take Babara on a date, and like, at the same night you sleep with her in the bed, you sleep with Barbara in the bed. And it was not good. It was not fair. As for me and for Babara, like.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, maybe I was just embarrassed about the consequences of my actions. I like, well, this is why you tried to hide me. She goes, well, I didn't want to make it a big thing. And for me to avoid it, I think it was just easier to avoid it. So I didn't to want avoid you intentionally. I avoided you on purpose. Does that make any sense?

[Ben Handelker]

So, yeah, yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

So you're like a coward.

[Ben Handelker]

You're coward, huh?

[Ronnie Caram]

She doesn't owe you a deep relationship talk, Celine. I'm sorry. You've set up a whole thing where you're gonna make out with everybody and have no strings with anybody. And if anybody gets upset with you, you say, well, but this is love. This is how I do. So this is just me. And then the second it happens to you, you act like Christ on a cross. Okay, sorry. Nobody's gonna feel for you, Love Island. Sorry, no one.

[Ben Handelker]

No one.

[Ronnie Caram]

Especially when you were just gonna use that girl and throw her away anyway. I mean, give me a break. You had one conversation with your brother where you're like, oh, my God, I'm never into girl, but this is girl. So maybe I do girl. Like, you're doing your, like, whole, like, oh, I'm experimenting with a girl for five seconds before I dump her and go stilly again. Like, shut up, Silane. And I really like Selene, but I'm gonna feel for you either. This whole crew is full of people that I actually like. I kind of like everybody on the show, but I'm not gonna feel sorry for them because our actions are all so stupid. Like, it's the. It's the team that, like, wants to sit there and cry about their consequences. Sorry. Sorry.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, I'm. I'm. I'm over it, really. So meanwhile, Carrie is trying out the new. New machinery and. All right, all right. Porter, stand starboard. Starboard. Porters. And port board, starboard. Starstones. Starboard star. Bow. Bow.

[Ronnie Caram]

Bow.

[Ben Handelker]

Of sorts. Okay. And adventure. It works. It works. All right, good job, everyone. Position.

[Ronnie Caram]

Position. Two feet away. Two feet and we're gonna die. We're gonna die. We're gonna. We're right there. We're all. We did it. We did it. Also, my son half parallel parked. He half parallel parked. He'll get there. I believe in him. Hold on, let me get to my wife. Wife. Wife. Carrie. Wife. Wife. Carrie. Hi. Hi, honey. You doing all right? I really don't care. I don't have time. I just got the boat out of the dock. Please have our son put the keys in the ball. Remind him to put the keys in the ball. All right, I'll see you in six months.

[Ben Handelker]

All right, chop chop, everyone. Time for one of these deranged preference sheet meetings where we split up half the crew into different rooms and talk about it. So charter seven, our primary guest is called Emily. She's a renowned dentist in San Francisco. You may be familiar with her dental practice called if you're going to San Francisco, get your teeth cleaned with some flowers in your hair. So she'll be joined with. It's a very long dental practice, but apparently does very well for her.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's great with teeth. She's terrible with brevity and titles.

[Ben Handelker]

She comes up with very terrible puns on the fly that she decides to make her company brand. I don't know why she doesn't give it.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's into very long puns. Extremely long puns.

[Ben Handelker]

Not really puns, just sort of. She inserts teeth into an established song lyrics.

[Ronnie Caram]

All right? She'll be joined by Eric, her husband, a semi retired tech guru, whatever that means. All right, now, the theme of the night, one should be like, Kentucky Derby. Because dentists and semi retired tech gurus love fake horse races that mean nothing.

[Ben Handelker]

Now, one thing you should know, because they had a choice between going to the Kentucky Derby or going to a yacht, so they decided they'd go to the yacht and recreate the Kentucky Derby. So here we are having a stupid theme for stupid people. Harry's like, actually, I like the Kentucky Derby theme. I just want to say, Ben, the Commentary on the side. I do enjoy a Kentucky Derby theme. It's like, better than some of the other. They pull up. Anyway, so Carrie's like, well, we leave here at 1 o' clock and go straight to the cost to the Sculpture Park. And the next morning, we're actually going to anchor in Saint Botts at Med Moore. Okay? It's going to be very stressful for me. More than the bridge. Can you believe it?

[Ronnie Caram]

More than the bridge.

[Ben Handelker]

Yes, because it's Med Moore and it's where you put two anchors down and you have to back into the dock and you put the lines across. That's just Med Moor living.

[Ronnie Caram]

More action made. More action. Listen, we put one anchor down, anyone on this boat could die. We put two anchors down, the entire world could end. Do you understand? If I don't get people calling, we could all be dead. All of us dead. All right, it's fine for now. It's fine for now.

[Ben Handelker]

It's like the old song goes, med, more money, Med more problems. So.

[Ronnie Caram]

But we don't have any ground lines or anything. It's just Inca's force. Is that how we're going to. It's just anchors. We could all die. That would be the consequences of our actions. Right? Right.

[Ben Handelker]

You know, I held out all season to not. Not to not go to Medmore and St. Bart's there's many obstacles to get in there. We cannot balls this up. All right, a lot of obstacles. For instance, you have to go through an actual labyrinth. The yacht must go through a labyrinth. You must. You will be plagued by visions of David Bowie as you sell your yacht down the labyrinth.

[Ronnie Caram]

We're gonna see a kind of creepy, overly skinny man in a Rod Stewart wig with a crystal ball.

[Ben Handelker]

All right, there will be a Bog of Eternal Stench, and we're going to try to avoid that. Guests do not like Eternal Stench. The. At one point, we'll all have some sort of fantasy moment where we'll pretend we're at some masquerade bog with. With that strange rods to it, man. And then we'll wake up with a small creature that's carrying lots of things on its back.

[Ronnie Caram]

One thing we don't want bowling it up. One thing we do want vegemiting it up. All right, we all on the same page right now. Ah, summer is winding down. But you know what? It's good to get back into a routine, and I think it's time to refresh my style for the new season. I'm looking for a lot of news. I'm Always looking for new stuff to refresh my style. And the best place to do it is where I do it. Always. Wayfair.

[Ben Handelker]

I know Wayfair is exactly where I go for a nice little refresh. Whether it's my office, whether it's some dining room stuff. I love what Wayfair does.

[Ronnie Caram]

Wayfair is great. I use it for the outdoors, I use it for the indoors. One of my favorite things about it is I can afford to get stuff from there and get it put together, so I'm not always having to sit here and put it together. People actually will come and put this stuff together and it all looks so, so good.

[Ben Handelker]

Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your home goals with endless inspiration for every space and budget.

[Ronnie Caram]

Wayfair's huge selection of outdoor items makes it easy to find exactly what's right.

[Ben Handelker]

For you, get organized, refreshed, and back to routine. For way less, head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com Wayfair Every style, every home. I just got back in town and the last thing I wanted to do was go to the grocery store. So I did what I always do. I called my good friend, Instacart. Instacart is more than a grocery technology platform. It's a care company designed to make life easier. It connects you to thousands of stores across the US Giving you time back to focus on what matters most.

[Ben Handelker]

With just a few taps, you can shop from your favorite stores and have fresh groceries and household essentials ready for pickup or delivered to your door. And as fast as 30 minutes, Instacart helps take care of delivering some of the things that you love so that you're free to take care of life.

[Ronnie Caram]

Instacart brings convenience, quality and ease right to your door so you can focus on what matters most.

[Ben Handelker]

Download the Instacart app and use code CRAPPINS20 to get $20 off your first order of $80 or more. That's code CRAPINS20 to get $20 off YOUR first order of $80 or more. Offer valid for a limited time, excludes restaurants. Additional terms apply.

[Ronnie Caram]

All right, and then the next morning, the guests get off, hopefully, literally. And then they come. The guests arrive. All right, so one more thing that's important to know. Emily, she just finished chemo treatment, everybody. And they're like, oh, God. And then Fraser in his meeting is like. And she's about to receive a mastectomy. Upon her return so this trip is all about her. Do we all understand? Party? Mastectomy party. Are we all there? All right.

[Ben Handelker]

So now Jess tells a story about how her. She was really close to her grandparents and she lost them both to cancer. And that this was. It was really rough stuff on her. And this is dredging up a lot of emotions for her.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, cancer is a real dick. My God. In a show where we like to make lots of jokes, I think everybody has been touched by cancer in some way and don't love it. I don't think anybody's got a great experience there, you know?

[Ben Handelker]

No, fuck you, cancer.

[Ronnie Caram]

Just. If we haven't said it enough recently, fuck off. So. 13.5 hours until chatter and Kyle making out in a laundry.

[Ben Handelker]

I know it's not going anywhere. Me and Sir Lane. It's past the point of emotion now. It just needs to be. It just. It just. It's just needs that must be met. Like, was it. Did it. Was it ever in a real place of emotion? I mean, I know you got sullen there for a moment, but, like, this was never a real relationship. Let's be honest, okay?

[Ronnie Caram]

It's also sad how happy Kyle is just being the only choice left. You know? It's like, well, she's gotten desperate enough to come back to me. I'll take it. I'll take it.

[Ben Handelker]

Damo may have been the. The final piece of. Of crispy tuna hors d' oeuvre that was passed around, but Kyle is the tray.

[Ronnie Caram]

Kyle's just the oily tray.

[Ben Handelker]

He's just the sad tray. And maybe some doilies.

[Ronnie Caram]

So S says we live for what? What do we live? Pleasure. We live pleasure. This is why we live pleasure. You're gonna. You're gonna die unhappy. I'm telling you that right now.

[Ben Handelker]

So now everyone goes to bed. Now it's the next morning. And Carrie does his inspections. Make sure everything looks good.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then.

[Ben Handelker]

And then the guests arrive. It's 1204pm in case you thought they arrived at noon. I had to. I had to break it to everyone. They arrived four minutes late for their charter. Oh, my goodness.

[Ronnie Caram]

This.

[Ben Handelker]

That's four minutes they'll never get back on the high seas.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm sorry. I'm semi retired. All you want from me. I played semi golf this morning. Okay.

[Ben Handelker]

You know what? Sorry, we just had a very biting discussion before. I'm a dentist. Sorry, I just. It's. You're just going to hear a lot of these puns all weekend long. Okay, everyone get ready.

[Ronnie Caram]

Take all the lines Off. Take all the lines off. Copy that. All lines are off. Bridge, Bridge. You're so stern is well clear of the dolphin. Clear of the dolphin. All right, out of the slip. Out of the slip, out of the slip. Distance to come to head 40 meters. 40 meters. All right. Oh, we're almost clearing the bridge. Almost cleared the bridge. And we got the steer is now clear. Smoking a cigarette there. That was the hottest yacht removal I've done in a long time. Nailed it.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah. Everything's fine. So the guests are hanging out. Emily, who is the cancer survivor, she is talking about how she just had to finish six months of chemo. And they're just, like, complimenting her and saying, you know, and she's saying, yeah, it was really scary. And. And her friend is saying, you know, it's blessings that you get to survive this. And, you know, you're feeling your pain and. And you're entitled to feel your own pain even though it isn't a death sentence, et cetera. So they are.

[Ronnie Caram]

I don't know why this helping. First of all. First of all, the guest, the main lady, is so sweet. She talks a little bit as the charter goes on. She reminds me of the drunk lady that got kicked off. Like, she's more well behaved, but she has kind of the same look and the same kind of vocal pattern as that lady. So she's like, yeah, that was really tough. That was really scary. And her friends, look, let me tell you this. You are a survivor. You are entitled to your pain. And I want you to feel your pain. Do you understand me? Because that is your right. And then their friend goes, do you snorkel? Is this other guest just always going on in platitudes where she's like, you listen to me. This morning is the best morning you're ever going to see. You get up and you tell the story, son. I love you, son, and I'm grateful to see you. You guys think we can get some breakfast around here? I'm really into bagels. I was trying gluten free for a while, but really didn't work out for me. God, they just don't make it taste like real bread, you know? Can I just. Eliza, can I just please.

[Ben Handelker]

I'm trying to do a pep talk with the cameras, okay? First of all, I'm scared of fish, okay? I want nothing to do with them. Right? Where were we?

[Ronnie Caram]

It just left the historical. Okay, so then Carrie is like, all right, all right, watch a chain. Watch a chain. Let me know how it's doing. Do you understand Me, Girl on the boat. All right, now what are you seeing up there? Can I get an update? I need a chain up. Where's my chain update? Where's my goddamn chain update? Justice. Like.

[Ben Handelker]

Oh, yes, the chain looks good, Cap. The chain looks good. And so do the consequences of my actions.

[Ronnie Caram]

Right, well, once you've locked down the chain, come see me in the wheelhouse, please. So she comes up and he's like, all right. On the anchor, you give me information when it's going out, but when it's out, you're waiting way too long between telling me anything. All right? Where's the dolphin? I need to know about the dolphin. Dolphin updates. What does it look like I'm doing up here? Twiddling my goddamn Vegemite?

[Ben Handelker]

I thought it was Marmite. And that's my bad. I should have looked at the label. These are the consequences of my actions. All right, all right, Just go. Just be catch. Get your head in the game. Okay? And remember, once you lock down that chain, just come and. Oh, I already told you, come in the wheelhouse. You're in the wheelhouse. Oh, that's funny. Anyway, just, you know, keep your head in the game.

[Ronnie Caram]

All right?

[Ben Handelker]

Like I was when I just recited what I was talking about. Keep your head in the game.

[Ronnie Caram]

Sorry about that. So she's upset. Like, she. She's visually upset. And so Damon notices her and she's like, hey, demon, I'm going to get the fins along. And he doesn't hear her and she's like, okay, fuck it, whatever. He's like, what the hell? You are right there.

[Ben Handelker]

She storms off. Yeah, she's upset upstairs or somewhere else. Hugo. Well, Hugo finds Jess. He's like, hey, are you all right? Because if you're not doing well, I'm gonna pass you off to Fraser. She's. Yes, I'm fine. Thank God. I was afraid I'd have to have a tough conversation. Okay, let's have a chat. Okay? If you're upset about something, you don't have to talk about it. That's fine. In fact, I'm going to encourage you to not talk about it. In fact, if you're really upset, how about we just go our separate ways? Okay? Thank you. She's like, well, Captain spoke to me about the Anka Drop and stuff and just some shit. And it was just. It was just frustrating for me. I understand that. I'm in my own head. It's just been a long fucking season.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's like, to be honest, I'm coming concerned about Jess's performance. I get that something's distracting her, and it doesn't help that she's having all these relationships going on and it's starting to bleed into work. And I'm just worried. I'm worried about where this is going to go. Penises, vaginas, things are just flying in the air. What does a Hugo to do?

[Ben Handelker]

I. You know, they are. They're trying to set up this thing. This may be kind of a callous take, and maybe it's. I don't know, maybe it's not a. I don't know, whatever. But I'm gonna say it anyway because it's my thought. When I watched it, there's. They're. They're trying to set it up like. Like, Jess is almost having this, like, noble, deep thing where, like, someone with cancer's on board and it's triggering her and reminding her of her grandparents, which may all be very true. And, like, I would never take that away, like, the trauma of something like that. But honestly, I actually really think what it comes down to is that Selene sat her down and was like. Like, you've been shit. You were shitty to me, and you made me feel bad. And I think that Jess is like. I think that's really what's motivating this. And I feel like the show is trying to make it seem like it's actually something, like, deeper and more noble and sadder and more linked to trauma. And I think that's probably there. But, like, I think ultimately Jess is just like, oh, I made someone mad. And, like, she doesn't. I think she likes to just do her thing. I think she's just. I think that's what it is.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think it is, too. I mean, that. That is my feeling. I made it. I made it kind of a comment in the beginning of the recap, like, making. Using that as an excuse. And that is kind of callous because I've been feeling. I'm glad you said it because I was sitting here feeling, like, guilty for saying that in the beginning, which is rare for me. I usually don't feel guilty. But, yeah, I mean, I think that the going through that with your family is upsetting. I've been through it with my own grandmother and my. My aunt and stuff, you know, so I get it. But also, yeah, she just got told off for being an asshole to somebody and hurting their feelings. And then that was followed up by having the captain upset with her. And so it's a couple things. And I think sometimes it's easier to be like, well, I'm crying for this other reason. I'm not really crying because, you know, I'm fucking up at work and I'm hurting everyone's feelings. I'm crying, you know, I'm gonna use this other thing. And it's not like she can't be sad over the grandma, but it's also like, like, you know, I don't know, it's kind of like, just take responsibility for what you did and apologize and move forward, you know?

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, I just had that, like, nagging feeling. Like, I know, like, you're sad and, like, this does remind you of your grandparents. But I feel like the real reason why your head is, like, in the clouds is because you're probably distracted because you're like, wow, Celine hates me and I'm a up. And now I just up this anchor thing. And then she just spiraled from there, especially because she probably thought that, like, when she finally started, like, truly now getting with Barbara, she felt like, I'm doing the right thing, I'm doing the mature thing, and da, da, da. And I fixed it all. And Celine's like, no, you actually still hurt me, and you did not fix it all. So that's my thing. I felt like that was my. My. My reaction to her emotional state on tv.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, me too. So then Anthony announces lunch. We have fish tacos, chicken tacos, and they're like, oh, my God, delicious. So now Damo and Jess are talking, and she's like, listen, before I turn this coffee machine on, I'm sorry about earlier. It had nothing to do with you. It's just that the captain called me to the bridge and he was talking about how I shouldn't be making out with people that I'm not with and sleeping with Barbara with him in the room. I'm. Wait, I'm sorry. Wait, I'm. Consequences.

[Ben Handelker]

He kept on seeing something that vegetables might do, and I was like, what might they do? And he said, well, veggie mite. And I said, what? Vegemite. What? He just kept on saying vegemite. I was like, finish your sentence. He's like, I did finish the sentence. I was like, is this some strange punishment for the consequences of my actions? What might the veggie do?

[Ronnie Caram]

And then I'm just bothered and it's. Oh, it's just one of those days. So now Fraser is cleaning up lunch.

[Ben Handelker]

Please take it personal. Please.

[Ronnie Caram]

Fraser's cleaning. And while the guests go out for snorkeling. And he's like, selene, you need to do all the day heads make sure the, the bar's perfect, the upper pantry is perfect, ready for service later. The bins need to be changed. So change those. I'm going on my break. Goodbye. Perfect. Thank you, honey. She's a good break. Always me for toilet. Always me. I guess it's. It is me. It is Day head, night head in between head, nap head, all head me. All head me. I suppose I'm not a children.

[Ben Handelker]

So then immediately Rainbow goes and takes a smoking break with Kyle and they're like in the corner by smoking right by the master bedroom. And I'm like, like, is that like the smartest place to do that? And then of course Rainbow sees them and he's like, oh, you're in trouble now. And she's like, oh, I'm in big trouble. I am dead. So then Rainbow's like, fraser, Fraser, Rainbow.

[Ronnie Caram]

I would like to talk to you for a second.

[Ben Handelker]

So she goes like off to his room and she's like, can I just like ask you something really quickly? I'm just double checking. Did you give Soso a. Just gonna check. Just like out of the blue, just wondering.

[Ronnie Caram]

No.

[Ben Handelker]

Oh, because she's on one right now. Isn't that funny?

[Ronnie Caram]

Where is she? Where, where is she doing this?

[Ben Handelker]

Next to the master. If you want to go talk to her, I guess you could do that. I don't know. Like, yeah, she's definitely not swinging a cigarette over there now.

[Ronnie Caram]

Place is going to come. Maybe it's on Blake. Maybe he's going to come. Blah blah blah blah. This is why he's going to do blah blah blah. But he British accent, he's like, do your work. When you have your break you can smoke. Okay, do, do your work first. At least she goes, but I was just like leave there because just do your work. But I run to cigarette and I know because Rainbow is doing everything, you know, I mean you've got day heads. Do the day heads.

[Ben Handelker]

The head bar pantry is like. And the quick fact, okay, you've got a whole hour of break time, okay?

[Ronnie Caram]

She's like, okay, okay.

[Ben Handelker]

Well if I see Rainbow do something I want to finish, I go, she's.

[Ronnie Caram]

She'S a big bitch.

[Ben Handelker]

Bigger than I thought.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh wow. That's why you should at least try to be nice to your superiors. Okay, so now it's first day of charter. 4:15pm People are sculpturing, they're under a sculpture park and Kyle's telling Hugo about the smoke break and getting in trouble, her getting in trouble and Rainbow being a tattletale basically. So then Jess radios to St. David that they're coming back and Rainbow and Celine have drinks and towels and all that good stuff. Guys, guys, we've got a rule to say balls. All right, We've got to get this Tinder in double time. That's right. Time, step, time, step. Double time, triple time, triple time, step. We're in 40 seconds straight. We're in the money. We're in the money. Oh, my God, I'm going so fast I'm going to lose my knees. We're in the money. Shuffle off the buffalo. Shuffle off the bubble. Wings. Wings got him exhausted. Cheese and crackers.

[Ben Handelker]

So then the guests come back on board and then Angela and Emily want to do a Titanic moment, but then Emily's hat flies away and Emily's like, well, it's a sign of our trip because I'm losing my tits five days after this trip. They're gone. But anyway, let's go. Let's do this.

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay.

[Ben Handelker]

I'm the king of the titties. Wow, that was. That was a mouthful saying that line. Dentist jokes. I just can't help myself sometimes.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now we're getting set up for the derby theme. All right, prep the yanker. Prep the yanker. Are we prepping two? Are we prepping one? Are we gonna cross the anchors? Are we gonna suck to soleil this? All right, everybody. I'm just getting myself warmed up over here. More bought more baths. More baths.

[Ben Handelker]

Copy, copy. Prepping the anchor now. Nothing could possibly go wrong. My head is in the game.

[Ronnie Caram]

What the going on here?

[Ben Handelker]

Red on deck. Red on deck. Sorry. The anchor dropped. I'm pulling it up now. Oh, dear. I can't believe the anger dropped. It is the consequences of my actions. My actions were thinking about other things for consequences sake.

[Ronnie Caram]

God damn consequences.

[Ben Handelker]

Oh, fuck's sake. Just. Just breathe. Do as that one country singer did and say, just breathe.

[Ronnie Caram]

Alright. What's the anchor doing? Just hang in there like a bowl. Like a nut in a sack that's bolted up. Are we pulling this up right now?

[Ben Handelker]

I am pulling it up. The anchor is clear of the water. Clear. Prepping the anchor. Oh, my head's not here, bro. My head is not here.

[Ronnie Caram]

Don't stress. If you can't get the anchor proper, it's Fraser's fault. She's like. But my head's not here, bro. All right. Three shackles in the water, please. Three? Where's the three? Where's my call for three?

[Ben Handelker]

65 shackles in the water. Oh, no. I messed up again. Pulling it up. Pulling it up. Okay, we're back to four shackles. Four shackles in the water.

[Ronnie Caram]

Alright, that's it. I'm doing something I don't normally have to do. I'm going down there and I'm going to talk to this little lady in person. Hello, little lady. Have you noticed that I'm covered in ball sack right now? Have you? Look at my face. There's a nut sack and two balls punching me in the forehead. All right, because you balled it up. You're balled it up.

[Ben Handelker]

Yes, well, so what happened earlier was the break wasn't on tight enough, so she just dropped as soon as I got rid of the winch. It's very clear what happened.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, well, that's a mistake we can't make again. I mean, wow. How are you gonna. How are you gonna. More baths today?

[Ben Handelker]

Oh, no. More consequences, more actions. It never ends.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, God. So he's pissed, but he can see that she's upset, so he's like. All right, now, while everybody's dressing like inflatable horses, I'd like to have a very serious conversation. Shall I call you by your stage name? Randy's Donut Underwear. All right, now you. All right, you're right, kid. I'm here to make you feel better. Hold on, let me cock one eye and remind you that you've balled it up. All right? Imagine that you're. You're talking to a big nutsack that's been thrown up against a window. All right, go ahead.

[Ben Handelker]

I just think the whole guest of the chemo thing, I just. It's hurting, it's hitting home a little bit. I don't think my head's been there. It's clearly showing, like, I don't know, like, especially on deck, you can see it.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, come here, come here, come here. Let me hook you. All right. God, you're bony. Geez. What do you do, pull ups? Those are some muscles on you. God, it feels like I'm holding dragon wings. You're extremely strong. Extremely strong. All right, now go take some time for yourself for it. Go to your room. If you need me, I'm always here. I'd prefer you didn't talk to me, but if you need to, I'm here, all right?

[Ben Handelker]

And here to make you smile, here's some Vegemite mite. What? Why do you torture me this way?

[Ronnie Caram]

God damn. How is Vegemite not caught on everywhere? That's my question. Let me tell you who the real failure is here today, Jess. Besides you. I Mean, you. I'll feel for you for a second, but you're a failure. But, you know, the biggest failure here, Vegemite. I mean, really, can we get spread further? Jeez.

[Ben Handelker]

I don't know what's going on with just completely. All I do know is that whatever it is, it's kind of boring. But there's something going on internally, and it's very important part of my job. Not just the crew's physical safety, but their health and their mental health, too. And I just want them to know that I'm there for them, especially if they want to talk about it in Turkish. Still taking the lessons, everyone? Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

He is very much like all my father, and that's what I am on this boat, a father. What's wrong with you? You said, go to bed. Go to bed. All right, talk to me.

[Ben Handelker]

Turn the lights off and sit with yourself and think about what you've done and how you almost killed us all. So Jess talks again about the cancer and how it really affects her and, like, how actually her. When she was younger, her grandparents managed a yacht club, and they grew up on boats because of grandparents. And really, it was because of her grandfather that she got into yachting. And so this is why she's really upset. So she's crying, and Barbara checks in on her and she's like, I am fine now. So the guests get ready, and they are dancing around in inflatable horses. And, you know, it's because the Kentucky Derby and all that fun stuff, it's disturbing.

[Ronnie Caram]

Just. Just. I just want to make you, make sure you're all right. And to tell you one thing that I've learned, and that is Disradia Aglomok. Right? What does that mean? Cry outside. All right. Don't want to see your face anymore. It's very smudgy. Please go do something.

[Ben Handelker]

I would like to add to the episode, please. I'd like to just tell America that my dad passed with a heart attack. So it was like, something brutal. So, you know, he didn't suffer because it happened like that. And like, with cancer, it's a hard fight. It's a battle. And I definitely want to make everything special for Emily and every meal I'm making for her, I want her to remember it's a celebration of life. And afterwards, I'm going to invite her down to Galley to hold tea towel and throw it at the refrigerator and.

[Ronnie Caram]

To really show you how meaningful this is all to me. I want to do it in where you can see my Instagram all here. I Am in a Speedo pitting a giraffe who's eating flauta, which is rolled taco.

[Ben Handelker]

And now to celebrate all of this, here is a steak with black cherry sauce. It's not a joke.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Fraser is helping with service and he announces the cherry sauce on the steak, which sounds weird, but, you know, you go. And then Hugo is figuring out his entertainment, which is the horse race.

[Ben Handelker]

And I guess I didn't do the race yet. They did like a pre. They did like pre, silly race, the horse stuff. But this is. They have a big race coming up.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's really funny watching them all dress like inflatable horse. I mean, it's just so ridiculous. And then it turns into this big dramatic scene. He's like, okay, what if it's. What is it? The three of us? How about the three of us race? Okay, you and Jess. And Rainbow goes, you guys can have Celine. And he goes, wow, you really hate her, huh? She's like, no, I don't hate her at all. Why would you say that? He goes, yeah, right. Bullshit. You're a terrible liar. And she's like, 0% of me has any hate in my body for any stupid bitch that won't do her work.

[Ben Handelker]

I'm literally just. Rainbow literally just was on TV saying, she is the worst kind of person. She is the worst. She is the worst person you could ever imagine. She is terrible. I don't have any part of me that has any hate. I'm like, okay, Rainbow, you channeled on yourself.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. And Hugo's like, okay, no comment then. And she's like, hugo's making statements about me. Fraser. She's like, fraser, Fraser, Rainbow. Phrase. I'm right here, darling. Well, still, I want to go by protocol because I'm not a hateful person. I'm being accused of hating Charlene and I don't like her at all. But I don't like. I don't like like that. And he's like, but I love the drama. It's so fun. She goes, oh, what are you trying to start? Shit, bro. What? Stay in your own lane, Hugo.

[Ben Handelker]

He goes like, oh, hell, you're a joke. What'd you call me? I said you're a joke. Me? I don't like when people. Right? Because, like, don't lie to my face. Rainbow and Celine have a really up relationship. There's all this cattiness and jealousy and they're always at each other's backs. And like, also this, like, affects the whole crew. Like, we feel it. We get dragged into It. Oh, I'm team Solan. Oh, I'm team Rambo. Grow up. Or how about you grow up and stay out of the. That interiors like, and, like, stop, like, making this. When he says, oh, don't lie to my face. Don't put in a position where she has a lie to her face because you're making her, like, have to say that she hates another crew member. And that's divisive.

[Ronnie Caram]

So, yeah, I agree with you. I think Hugo's the. In this situation. Like, it's not up to you to be policing people's words and how they're feeling. This isn't even your department, sir, so back off. And you're the one starting fights. Like, you're literally starting. Starting a fight right now. And that's gonna affect the crew. And then you're gonna go talk about what a rainbow is, and that's gonna affect the crew. And also, there is no. I'm team Rainbow and I'm team Celine. That's not happening. Unless it's something that's.

[Ben Handelker]

No one cares.

[Ronnie Caram]

But no one is.

[Ben Handelker]

No one's acting like that.

[Ronnie Caram]

So stop being a little shit starter, Hugo. And then complaining that everybody's starting shit. You are the biggest one to complain about drama. But you've now started, like, three of them. So.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, also, no one even talks to Rainbow. Like, I don't think even people pay attention to Rainbow. She's just there. The people say hi to her and they just move on. So it's not even like, there isn't like, a divided crew. People, like, people are just doing their other things.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah.

[Ben Handelker]

So then Fraser is like, well, I'm sorry, Fraser's talking to Rainbow. And Rainbow's like, what was. What was that comment from Hugo? He's like, oh, I thought it was all joking. And he was like, oh, you really hate her. And was like, oh, no, I'm just saying. And he was like, oh, this is so high school. You don't hate her. You don't hate her. You don't hate her. You're a fucking joke. Okay? You don't come and guess what? Hugo doesn't come to our space and start shouting at my people. That's. That's. You know what I'm going to. I'm going to walk right up to him and you know what I'm going to say to him? I'm going to say, listen, Hugo, excuse me, I'm trying to get by. And he will learn from experience, I'll tell you that much.

[Ronnie Caram]

Read him for filth. Excuse Me. Thank you. See? See? Just did it. So dessert served. And Anthony is like, tonight, for the last course, we got boobies. Oh, yes. In honor of breast cancer, for the last cause, we have profiterole with vanilla ice cream, homemade chocolate sauce, and homemade whipped cream with a skirt steak in the middle. Because my grandpa liked this. He also was a big fan of potato, so that's neither here nor there, but he rode the horse, too. Show the Instagram. Show it. Show it.

[Ben Handelker]

It's sort of. I mean, this again. I'm not trying to be insensitive, but there is also something about this episode. This woman has, like, gone through hell. She's had chemo, and she's celebrating life. Like, she made it to the other side. She is so lucky. And she's, like, here on this boat, she's celebrating, and everyone's just talking about the people that they've lost. And I just feel like, actually, like, I don't know. I mean, like, everyone's gone through. It's traumatic. I understand it's dredging up memories, but I almost kind of feel like I want. I almost was like, why can't they actually be more like, let's celebrate your life than, like, dwell in, like, the.

[Ronnie Caram]

The.

[Ben Handelker]

The losses that we have? And I understand, like, you, like, it brings up stuff, but there's part of me that's kind of. I don't know. I kind of felt like, well, so.

[Ronnie Caram]

If you're really close with someone who's ever gone. Gone through this, it's so fucking difficult. And let me tell you, the last thing they want to hear. Hey, guys, I've been through chemo. I've been through a hell of a time. I've been dealing with cancer for a couple of years, and I thought to die. Oh, my grandma died of that. I'm still upset. My grandma passed. My grandpa passed. Everyone's dead. We get it. We get. It's like, no, this is my cancer. Like, I don't want to hear about your trauma. This is not about you, okay? This is about me. This is about me. Stop all of your fucking trauma. Do your trauma on your own time. This is my cruise to talk about my pain. Get your grandmother out of here. Get her out. Will your dead grandmother out of my scene.

[Ben Handelker]

It's. And it's almost like. And I know Jess and the chef are not talking to the guests about this stuff, but there's also an element of, like, this lady came on here to celebrate life, and she's gonna turn on Bravo, and what's she gonna See all these people who are like, oh, yeah, like, it's like, like, can we celebrate this lady more? Like, this is such an amazing thing for her. But, like, I understand. It's. I'm trying to ride a line here of being like, you know, acknowledge that people, you know, are brought to places where they are thinking about loss and they're allowed to feel that way. But I also am just like, I kind of feel like it's overshadowing that this woman is actually like. Like she's like done something amazing. Right. Or she's gone through something. So.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah.

[Ben Handelker]

And come out the other side.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think they're just doing the reality show thing of like, okay, it's a cancer episode. So everybody talk about people that you've known with cancer. So they're just doing it, you know, they're just doing. Doing what they're told. But I think it's put together kind of in a clunky way. I agree with you.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Because I don't have cancer currently. But I watch this and I'm like, I'm getting offended for the lady with cancer treatment. I'm like, can the lady have her own moment? Okay. This is not about ever. This is not about you.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah, I think that's what it is. It's like I'm trying to like, like, I'm not trying to dismiss anyone's stories and like, obviously Anthony's not even talking about cancer. I'm not trying to dismiss these stories. These are important life shaping things. But I'm also kind of like, I don't know, I feel like they are detract. They're detracting from what should be a celebration of this. Of this dentist.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, my fucking profiterole. And do you know what we really need to settle?

[Ben Handelker]

Thank you for like just crystallizing what it's all about.

[Ronnie Caram]

And you know what we really need to celebrate? More chew pastry. I mean, we really all need to be making more choux pastry. It's not that difficult. And it is so delicious. It really is. I'm gonna make some today for my friend Trisha, who's staying with me. We're gonna have shoe tonight. That's it.

[Ben Handelker]

Wow. Shoe. Shoe. Shoopa. Dupe. Shoopa. Dupe. Shoopa. Duper. Duper pastry.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's gonna be a very share evening over here. We're gonna have some Cher shoe. Okay.

[Ben Handelker]

Someone wants to. Someone once said they cannot stand when I sing on the podcast. And I. To that person I say, sorry, this episode got the music in me.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, oh. I've got a song to sing for you. Person who wrote that comment. You. You, You.

[Ben Handelker]

I actually have a. Here's a song for them. Run away, run away Run away and save your life Run for your mother.

[Ronnie Caram]

And run for your sister Run for your mother and run for the doggy Run to the running and running and running and. Do you remember that song, that Florence of the Machine song? I felt like every time I walked.

[Ben Handelker]

In, I literally listened to it loudly.

[Ronnie Caram]

Every time I walk into the Trader Joe's, they're like, run by your mother and run for my sister. Dong.

[Ben Handelker]

Someone rings that bell, we need assistance. Oh, thanks. Thanks, Sherry, for doing it on beat.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, you like the jelly beans here, huh? I mean, they're just so different. They really are, aren't they? You're getting two of them. Good for you. Good for you.

[Ben Handelker]

I never go into Trader Joe's anymore, but I actually happened to go in, like, yesterday. It's so funny that we're talking about it right now. No one ever talks about Trader Joe's.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I don't go in much either because there's always a line in the valley to get in that goddamn. Not to get in. But it's like, so hard to move because it's so small. But I went this weekend on vacation and wife. Wow. You can get all their frozen things. I forgot how good their stuff is there.

[Ben Handelker]

I know.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, I got so many appetizers. You throw them in the micro and people are like, ronnie, what a chef.

[Ben Handelker]

I know. I. Yeah, I got some frozen gyozas because I'm going to try a recipe, a tomato dumpling salad where you basically toss dumplings with fresh tomatoes and, like, vinaigrette. And it's supposed to be amazing. And I'm going to delightful. Yep. Go fast for your mother and fast fool your sister. Go run with the Florence and machines on the yacht. So. Oh.

[Ronnie Caram]

So this is where it gets really good. Okay. So they do the derby. It's bedtime. It's like 11, 17 at night. And Celine hurts herself on the coffee machine because she's cleaning. And she goes, oh, coffee machine. Ow. Coffee machine. And rainbow goes. Do you ever think that when you hurt yourself, this is karma? Just. Only a baby. Just. Yeah. So, you know, because you over your teammates every day, that's fine. Whoa.

[Ben Handelker]

Yeah. I said those things are just. I said, that's because you over your teammates. You know how when you hurt yourself, you know, every time you fall down the stairs, every time you trip and fall, that's karma. You over all of us. You.

[Ronnie Caram]

She goes, you want to say something to me, Rainbow? And she's like, okay. She tells us. Here we go again. Another fight. Rainbow is like, beast of vagina bush.

[Ben Handelker]

I don't even know what that means.

[Ronnie Caram]

Vagina bush.

[Ben Handelker]

I feel like there's, like, some French put down that she, like, translated into English very literally. Like, like, in France. Like, in French, if you say, like, beast of vagina bush, like, it's like, it makes sense, but, like, in English, it's like, what?

[Ronnie Caram]

That's funny. Beast of vagina bush.

[Ben Handelker]

So then Selena's like, so I go to bed when everything is finished, and Rainbow's like, well, technically, you go to bed when I send you to bed, and all you have to do is just. Just the bar and the day ahead. Just.

[Ronnie Caram]

Just.

[Ben Handelker]

But maybe you could put the. Of just pickles, you know, vagina bush.

[Ronnie Caram]

You know, I feel your energy, and I just want to say, it shows me that you don't care about me. She goes, yes, of course. She goes, okay, so go start. She goes, okay, nice conversation, vagina bush. And Rainbow says, no, it wasn't a nice conversation. She was. It was sarcastic.

[Ben Handelker]

You. And then Rainbow is like, girl, get the out of my face. And then she starts to, like, clench her fists, and she has all these flashbacks, and we hear, like, the flash backs of her being, like, my sister would get me so angry that we would just beat each other up on an island in the middle of Holland.

[Ronnie Caram]

This whole thing was so camp and hilarious how they just kept showing. They show her, like, doing her deep breathing, like, rainbow. Rainbow, calm down. My sisters and I were put on an island to beat each other up. Rainbow, calm down. I hate my sisters. I want to hit my sisters. Rainbow. I solve things with violence.

[Ben Handelker]

Rainbow.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then it just shows her, like, her fists are bald, and she's like, don't do it, Rainbow. Don't do it, bro. But I really want to hit her. I really want to hit her. Do it, Rainbow. Do it. Hit her.

[Ben Handelker]

Oh, my goodness. Oh, you know what? We.

[Ronnie Caram]

Rainbow's psycho. What the hell is wrong with Rain? Like, she just started that fight now. She's like, I want to hit her. I dare you.

[Ben Handelker]

Yes. So everyone, that was it. That's the. That is.

[Ronnie Caram]

What were you saying? What were you about to say? Like, oh, no, we just meeting.

[Ben Handelker]

That started eight minutes ago. I just saw. So we have to wrap this up. Yeah. I didn't even realize. Thank you, everyone, so much for being here. We have got to go to a meeting, and we will talk to you on the next one. Bye.

[Ronnie Caram]

Bye.

[Ben Handelker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Handelker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Handelker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

A good time when you're wasting time with Bravo. She ain't no shrinking violet couture. We love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens you can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey it's your man Nick Cannon and I'm here to bring you my new podcast, Nick Cannon at Night. I've heard y' all been needing some advice in the love department, so who better to help than yours truly? Nah, I'm serious. Every week I'm bringing out some of my celebrity friends and the best experts in the business to to answer your most intimate relationship questions. Having problems with your man? We got you catching feelings for your sneaky link. Let's make sure it's the real deal first. Ready to bring toys into the bedroom? Let's talk about it. Consider this a non judgment zone to ask your questions when it comes to sex and modern dating in relationships, friendships, situationships and everything in between. It's gonna be sexy, freaky, messy. And know what? You'll just have to watch the show. So don't be shy, join the conversation and head over to YouTube to watch Nick Cannon at night or subscribe on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast. Want to watch episodes early and ad free? Join Wondery plus right now.