#2987 Below Deck S12E14 Part 1: Don’t Speak

Summary

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Watch What Crappens Ep. 2987 Recap

Below Deck S12E14 Part 1: Don’t Speak
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Release Date: September 2, 2025

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Episode Overview

Ben and Ronnie recap and vigorously roast the first half of Below Deck Season 12, Episode 14 ("Don’t Speak"), focusing on the continuing management (and mismanagement) drama among the St. David crew – especially centering on Chief Stew Fraser, the ever-languishing Solène, and the ongoing bickering between the deck and interior teams. The guys combine biting commentary, Bravo franchise deep-dives, and personal comedic tangents, all while poking fun at crew incompetence and the overblown dangers of med mooring.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Bravo's Current Landscape & Below Deck's Place

• (02:46-04:12) Ben and Ronnie reflect on the light Bravo schedule, the end of Love Island, Potomac’s upcoming return, and what it means for their podcasting lives. They joke about a lighter Bravo workload:
  • “It has been kind of weird having a little lighter schedule... But we need to have our Bravo, though.” – Ben (04:12)
• Both hosts suggest “Below Deck” is winding down, making room for new drama as other franchises ramp up.

2. Fraser’s Perpetual Management Crisis

• (04:12-12:37) The duo analyze Chief Stew Fraser’s continuing inability to manage his staff, particularly Solène ("So So"). Ben doubts Fraser's managerial chops, noting:
  • “I just don’t know if he’s up for it... I don’t think he’s a manager.” – Ben (05:14)
• Ronnie observes Fraser pays too much attention to audience criticism and tries to rebrand himself each season, making him “too affected by the audience.”
• Both agree he avoids direct confrontation and prefers to complain behind people’s backs or make passive changes rather than proper discipline.
  • “He’s got the balls to go to the captain and complain... but he doesn’t really have the nuts to do it right to their face.” – Ronnie (11:05)

3. Solène: Problem Child or Scapegoat?

• (10:05-16:08) They debate how “bad” Solène really is compared to past “Below Deck” crew disasters. Ronnie points out she at least tries and works hard sometimes, but admits she regularly slacks and has been caught skipping duties.
  • “Selene has an attitude... But I think we’ve seen way worse.” – Ronnie (10:05)
• A running comparison is made to a parent negotiating poorly with a bratty child:
  • “Why are you negotiating with little terrorist? ...That’s how Fraser is with Solene.” – Ben (09:01)
• Rainbow, another stew, is criticized equally for waffling between confrontation and a desire to be liked.

4. Rainbow’s and Jess’s Motives & Tactics

• (14:35-18:47) Rainbow, who has been picking up Solène’s slack, tries yet again for a “clear the air” moment, only to backtrack with vague pleas for everyone to simply “try to work better together.” Ben mocks Rainbow’s lack of follow-through.
• Ronnie notes that Rainbow wants to be liked too much to be genuinely tough with Solène.
• Jess gets called out for only caring about Solène’s work ethic after a personal conflict, undermining her own credibility as a manager.

5. Guest Drama: The Booby Cake

• (18:59-19:59) The hosts skewer the guests’ request for a “booby cake” for a friend about to undergo a mastectomy, questioning the tastefulness of such a cake for the occasion.
  • “Why would you do that? …Don’t make me that.” – Ronnie (19:10)

6. Kyle, Crew Gossip & Relationship Cycles

• (20:16-21:24) Kyle’s endless romantic entanglements persist, to Ben’s exasperation:
  • “We also need to stop having these storylines about Kyle and the woman he falls for... It’s never been compelling for me.” – Ben (20:57)

7. Delegation, Leadership, and “Don’t Speak to So So”

• (25:12-32:34) Fraser instructs Hugo to tell the deck crew not to talk to Solène during beach service. Both hosts lambaste Fraser for outsourcing conflict and Hugo for not taking ownership, instead “tattling” and undercutting his own authority.
  • “This is bad parenting, where you expect everyone else to make modifications for your devil child.” – Ben (26:39)
  • “He’s like, ‘Fraser told me to tell you’...People don’t take it seriously. …Not a good leadership quality from Hugo either.” – Ben (31:28)
• They mock the ridiculousness of making the whole crew change their behavior rather than simply confronting Solène.

8. Language Tangents & New Letters

• (33:24-35:42) A signature Ben & Ronnie tangent: they muse about inventing a new letter to express the “zh” sound (as in “as usual”). This evolves into laughter about increasing illiteracy and why Americans are doomed if new letters or numbers are introduced.
  • “Why can’t we invent a new letter in our language that does the sound?... Why can’t we do this?” – Ben (33:24)

9. Personal Drive & Toilet-Cleaning Ambitions

• (36:00-36:49) Rainbow, trying to defend her career ambition, declares herself a “heartless killer” and “ambitious” despite still cleaning toilets. Both hosts mock her “Succession-level” delusions but lend backhanded support.

10. Beach Setup & Knife Safety Horror Show

• (38:02-54:49) On the beach, Solène’s dangerous knife-washing and holstering technique has everyone on edge, including Ben and Ronnie.
  • “She’s washing with sand… with her bare fingers, like that’s a chef’s knife!” – Ben (53:57)
  • Ronnie considers Solène’s survival thus far “Darwinian luck.”

11. Med Mooring Mania

• (55:41-62:17) Captain Carrie and the hosts become hyperbolic about the perils of med mooring in St. Barths, joking about the notorious difficulty and potential for cast mutilation or Kraken attacks.
  • “There could be a tsunami… a rope down on top of a guest’s brain. We never know what could happen on a beach picnic.” – Ronnie as Captain Carrie (28:55)
  • “We used to be afraid of the Kraken, but then one day, Captain Glenn crashed into the Kraken and the Kraken actually died.” – Ben (56:53)
• They lampoon the constant danger-mongering in the show’s voiceovers and tease future crash montages.
• Ronnie’s Captain Sandy impression makes a cameo during a faux radio call about Med Mooring and Solène.

12. Crew Trauma Monologues & New York Slander

• (45:19-51:55) Hugo launches into a story about his tough New York upbringing, to which Ben and Ronnie react with increasing derision about “sirens and gunshots,” mocking his victim narrative and expressing skepticism about the actual trauma.
  • “I grew up upstairs from Cipriani’s. One horror after another.” – Ben (46:41)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• (05:14) Ben on Fraser:
  “I just don’t know if he’s up for it… I don’t think he’s a manager.”

• (11:05) Ronnie on Fraser:
  “He’s got the balls to go to the captain and complain... but he doesn’t really have the nuts to do it right to their face.”

• (19:10) Ronnie on booby cake:
  “Why the fuck would you do that? ...I don’t want that.”

• (26:39) Ben on managing Solène:
  “This is bad parenting, where you expect everyone else to make modifications for your devil child.”

• (31:28) Ben on Hugo:
  “People don’t take it seriously. …Not a good leadership quality from Hugo either.”

• (33:24) Ben’s language tangent:
  “Why can’t we invent a new letter in our language that does the sound?”

• (46:41) Ben on Hugo’s NYC upbringing:
  “I grew up upstairs from Cipriani’s. And let me tell you something: One horror after another.”

• (53:57) Ben on Solène’s knife-washing:
  “She’s washing with sand… with her bare fingers, like that’s a chef’s knife!”

• (55:41) Ronnie as Captain Carrie on med mooring:
  “There could be a tsunami… a rope down on top of a guest’s brain.”

• (62:56) Ronnie closes Part 1 with:
  “This is a two-part recap… Come back a little later for part two.”

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Key Timestamps by Segment

• 2:29–4:12: Bravo scheduling shifts & podcasting lives
• 4:12–12:37: Fraser’s management woes dissected
• 10:05–16:08: Solène’s work habits & Rainbow confrontations
• 18:59–19:59: The “booby cake” debate
• 20:16–21:24: Kyle’s endless drama
• 25:12–32:34: The “don’t talk to Solène” crew directive
• 33:24–35:42: Language tangent & new alphabet proposals
• 36:00–36:49: Rainbow’s career ambitions lampooned
• 38:02–54:49: Beach setup, knife chaos, crew gossip
• 55:41–62:17: Med mooring danger montage, fake radio skit
• 45:19–51:55: Hugo’s hardship monologue deconstructed

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Overall Tone & Takeaways

Ben and Ronnie’s tone is highly irreverent, sarcastic, and affectionate in their mockery. They scrutinize every crew flaw, dissect managerial cowardice, and turn small behavioral details into sprawling comedic riffs. The two expertly shift from pointed analysis to absurd humor, ensuring the recap is as entertaining as the episode itself (if not more so). Their signature banter and inventive tangents provide a detailed, hilarious snapshot of crew dysfunction on Below Deck and Bravo at large.

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For listeners and non-watchers alike:
This episode offers a full, funny debrief of all key Below Deck crew dynamics and memorable comic detours—no actual viewing required.

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Transcript

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[Ronnie]

Well, hello and welcome to Watch what Crap Ends. I forgot to play our intro video, but we're going to roll with it. Hi, I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there. Hi Ben.

[Ben]

Hi Ronnie. How's it going?

[Ronnie]

Good. What's going on with you today, honey?

[Ben]

Not much. Just had a really fun Labor Day weekend. We had so much fun on Amazon Live last night I went over to Ronnie's house to give him his birthday gift. And then we played video games and did Amazon Live together. And you all should watch it because we always act like two little kids when we are sitting together and on camera.

[Ronnie]

We were playing the Quest. What is it? The Quest 3. Virtual reality stuff. That was really fun. I got to watch Ben play golf. Well, it was pretty. Yeah, it was pretty fun. And shoot Alien. So, yeah, we had a good teenage boy day. Today is below deck day. Okay? If you want these on video, go over to Patreon. If you want them a week later, you don't care about getting them fresh. You can get them free on YouTube at our watch what Crappens channel. Also on Patreon is where you get our bonus episodes. We did a three hour Love island last week, which was a lot, and this week we're going to probably do Real Housewives of Potomac Trailer trash. That just came out. A below deck trailer just came out too. But honestly, it looks the same. It's a bunch of fuckboys. I didn't even watch each other. Except this time there's also Captain Sandy, you know, offering a hug after everybody gets fucked over. So that should be fun. It has been kind of weird having a little lighter schedule. We're not used to that. I mean, Bravo has been lightening up, and then now we've got McBee leaving. I mean, what the heck? What are we supposed to do?

[Ben]

Well, some things we can consider a blessing. I think we're about to get Salt Lake City coming back. Potomac is coming back. We will have a below deck med. I'm sure there'll be some other things, but I agree, it is kind of lighter. I'm sort of enjoying it. I mean, I'm enjoying this sort of casual. But we need to. We need to. We need to have our Bravo, though. Like, we could only have so much downtime. Okay, so, like, let's fill the. Let's fill the Bravo coffers again. Let's get some shows up and running. But for the meantime, it seems like this below deck is winding down. The end is nigh. They have one charter left. I just want to say something that I think we've said before, but I feel like it's just important just to say it now. Like, Fraser, it's been, I think three seasons of him being chief. Stew, I think he. I just don't know if he's up for it. I just don't think he can do it. I don't. I don't think he's a manager. I think he is. I think he is someone who is detail oriented. And I think that he's probably a good, like, obeyer. But I feel like when it comes to watching him manage his staff season after season, I just fear that this is not his strong suit. And he always talks about trying to grow and trying to get better, but I feel like when Jess gives, so. So the reprimand, that's stronger than Fraser. That's not good. You can't have just be the one who is a better chief sue than Fraser is.

[Ronnie]

Well, yeah, I mean, I think Fraser probably plays to the audience, you know, because he mentions a lot. Like, well, first they said I was this and then they said I was that. And I think he means the audience, you know, like he, like he says in this episode, I'm trying to change my managerial skill because I was too confrontational last time. And then now I'm trying to do this. It seems like he finishes the season, reads what people are saying, and tries to adjust instead of just doing a good job. You know what I mean? Like, he's trying to win points with the audience. He's too affected by the audience. And I think it's gotta be really hard when you're a reality star to. And I'll use that term lightly, but to read all the shit that's said about you online, and we see it with housewives all the time trying to adjust their behavior and it just ends up screwing you over because then you're trying to be someone else. And if she can't even be yourself that well, you're certainly not going to be anybody else that well. And I think it ends up screwing them over. And Fraser is suffering from that. I saw something. He was doing an Instagram, not like Q and A thing, you know, where they ask questions and he answers it and someone said someone asked him some question. He was like, well, you know, I've got to give the haters the chance to comment. Have fun, haters. And I'm like, you care too much. Like you're on a show, people are going to comment about the show. I know it can't be easy to read that stuff because, listen, we get nasty comments sometimes and we'll be. Both of us will be fetal. I mean, not as much anymore. We get used to it. But there have been times where we're like, oh, my God. So I get it. But at the same Time, you know, you put yourself out there and people have the right to say something. And I wouldn't be able to read anything because I think even the perfect people get called idiots and assholes on the Internet. No one escapes.

[Ben]

Yeah. Yeah. I, I think what if the issue is that he's too concerned about, like, you know, his public Persona? That's. That's not good. I, I just don't know. I just, you know, he keeps on, he keeps on acting like in the past he was too quick to fire. I'm like, well, maybe you were too quick to fire, but it's also not great to be too slow to fire as well. But it's not even about firing. It just seems like we made some jokes last week about how Fraser was like, I'm going to give. So, so talking to. And he walks up and he's like, please be a little faster. Can you please work some more? And it's like, you've got to like, have some. You've got to like. You got to like, crack. Crack the. Was it crack the whip. Whatever it is that I like. You gotta like, come on, like light the fire under these people a little bit more. And it's not like, okay, so yesterday I went to. I'm gonna relate this to terrible parenting because I think that's what this ultimately is. I went to a farmer's market yesterday and they had.

[Ronnie]

You were going to talk about Bueller because you were over here yesterday and Bueller kept licking you and coming to sit by you and coming to sit on you and sit under you.

[Ben]

I went to my friend's house and his dog was out of control.

[Ronnie]

I was like, wait a minute, this car is sitting too close to home.

[Ben]

No. So I went, I went to the, I went to a farmer's market and they had, you know, those little things, the anti fly things that little propellers that go around. They're like the little flies. Yeah, goes around. So some little kid plucks it like a. Like a vendor had put it amongst their wares. Some little kid plucks it off because he thinks it's a toy. So the vendor's smiling at first and the kid's like, ooh. And then the kid starts walking away with it. And then the dad's like, okay, you have to give that back. He's like, no, it's like, you have to give that back as I want it. It's like, you have to give that back. And like is walking far away. And I'm like. And the dad's like, the dad makes this sort of, like, lame sort of swipe at. He goes. And kids like, no. And the dad goes. He has this look like, well, I tried. I'm like, you're the dad. You're bigger, you're stronger. You can pull that thing away from your son. Don't be like, why are you negotiating with little terrorist? Okay, this kid just stole something from the. From the vendor. And you're like. For a moment, I felt like if no one was watching, the guy would have been like, well, he really wants it, so. And I kind of feel like that's how Fraser is with Solane. He's kind of like, well, could you not take any breaks? That would be great. Thank you. And you just need to sometimes grab the toy out and give it back to the farmer.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. I mean, look, I'm not as down as on Solane as everybody else. I think in this. In the whole scheme of things, the people that we've seen on Deck, I mean, we could have Camille. You know what I mean? Someone like that who is just literally the worst. Selene has an attitude. Celine does smoke when she's not supposed to. She does. She did do that thing where she just went to bed and didn't finish her work. I mean, I'm not gonna sit here and say, celine is a good employee, but I think we've seen way worse. And one point that he made in his Q and A, he was kind of standing up for Solane and saying, like. Because everyone's like, why aren't you firing Silane? She's terrible. And he said, you know, because she. At least she's nice about it, and she, like, takes the notes, and she actually does work hard. And, you know, people are like, what. What about the time she went to bed when she did it? You know, I see that side, too, but I also do see his side in that. In that does work. I mean, we don't. We see some take too many breaks or eat breakfast when she's not supposed to. And Barbara even said. And I trust Barbara. Like, Barbara seems like a trustworthy employee. Right? And she says, we're all used to Selene not really doing as much work as she's supposed to do. So. And making Rainbow. You know, we give Rainbow a lot of shit on the show, but Rainbow does pick up a lot of slack of this girl. So I'm not standing up for Slain and saying she's the best. But I do think that we also see Selene working, and that seems to be a hard job. And I See her working and keeping it light and having fun. So I don't know. But the thing with Fraser is he's just such a wuss. He always does these manipulative ways of dealing with things instead of just dealing with a head on. He's got the balls to go to the captain and complain to everybody, but he doesn't really have the nuts to do it right to their face in the proper way. So I definitely see what you're saying. And he does it again in this episode. It's like, you know, you tell people not to talk to Silane. It's brought up right in front of you and you just, you just stay quiet and wait for somebody else to get accused. And it's like, that's not cool. Like, you've got to have the Stones dude to say, why did that? Because, yes, we're not. Because you're not working. Right. So I'm trying to, you know, whatever his reasoning was, he should have just said it instead of staying quiet and just letting Celine go on a rampage trying to find out who did that, you know? Yeah, just a worse. He's a worse, you know?

[Ben]

Yeah, I just, I just don't think he has necessarily like. I don't think he has like the management, like skills.

[Ronnie]

Put him out the past, Jeff.

[Ben]

Yeah, I just don't think. I just don't think this is his. His. I don't think it's a strong point. Sorry.

[Ronnie]

And as far as what you were saying about that kid, you know, I saw a kid, I was at the music store last night and this kid, this dad was another dad, run. Comes in with this kid, his kids in his diaper. You know, it's Hollywood. Like, put your kid in some shoes, sir, and put your kid in some clothes, okay? Because this is a grimy ass town, okay? It's Sunset Strip Guitar Center. This baby runs in and runs straight to a bass drum and just starts punching the shit out of the bass drum. And the dad's like a little musician there. Look at this. I already got a little beetle on my hands, am I right? And I just thought of something I say on the show all the time, which is the late great Bernie Mac America beat your children, okay? I mean, what the hell?

[Ben]

If they're beating a drum, then you can beat them. Yes.

[Ronnie]

Okay, so here we go. It's below deck. Season 12 Episode 14 Nobody Puts Baby Breaks in the Corner.

[Ben]

Kind of funny. So previously, Carrie has told Kyle that he can't mingle with guests anymore. He's on guest probation. And where we left off was Rainbow being like, don't punch her. Ah, don't punch her. But I want to punch her. I want to punch her. Take me to Holland.

[Ronnie]

Don't hit her, bro. She's not worth it. Bro, bro, bro, bro. Very tough rain, bro. So Celine is like, oh, Rainbow again. She do the least. I would. I will report this book every day. I try. I try. Why does no one give me the quads? I try. I'm not a children.

[Ben]

I will say this in Celine's credit. Where I think Celine really excels is that she is, like, strangely very plucky. She gets yelled at, and then she sort of shrugs as, okay, you want to have war? We have war. But, okay, go back to work now.

[Ronnie]

Well, it's like someone. It's like Jax on Vanderpump Rules, right? Jax is the quickest. He's the best apologizer because he's had to do it so many times. And I think that's how Celine is. I mean, she's just so annoying. She's probably been told off by everybody that she comes in contact with, and she's just. She can bounce back.

[Ben]

Yeah, she really can. So, yeah, so Rainbow is, like, going through it, but, like, of course, like, nothing happens. Like, literally nothing happens on that front. So Celine is basically just like, you know, rainbows again. She do the list. I report back to book again every day. I try every day.

[Ronnie]

I just try every day. But, ah.

[Ben]

So basically she doesn't. She just ignores Rainbow, whatever Rainbow yelled at her about last week.

[Ronnie]

And Rainbow decides instead of beating her ass, she's just gonna make her take some champagne upstairs. So she gives her a drink order and is telling. She's complaining to Jess and saying, oh, this girl, you know, I do the work, but this girl doesn't do nothing. But all day freaking day, she acts tough. I don't understand this girl. And then she spills her drinks and she's like, oh, no, it's the last one. I don't have any more. Cause of me goes, oh, no.

[Ben]

I definitely can see. So. So is not working up to her standards. I know Rainbow has been working her ass off also season, and I do think so. So is an apple at the moment that's rotting. But she did that to herself. Some would say these are the consequences of her actions.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, you were fine with that when you were, you know, hooking up with Solane. Ma', am, I think she's pulling kind of a Gary here. She's pulling a fuckboy where she's not hooking up with the person anymore, and then suddenly starts coming up with reasons. Reasons to not like her. Not that she's really. Well, not only that, but this was fine with you a couple of weeks ago in the shower, as I recall.

[Ben]

Yeah, but not only that. Don't forget last episode, Celine sat down Jess and was like, I didn't like the way you treated me. I thought we had something. And you were, like, really mean to me, and you discarded me. And so Celine went off on Jess last episode, and now all of a sudden, Jess is like, she's not a good worker. I'm like, okay, so this is your revenge. You're going to plot out revenge against. It happens to be that you're right. But we know your motivations are not because of the vessel.

[Ronnie]

They're not sure, ma'. Am. Your motivations are not pure. And we've seen this many times. It's usually with men doing it to women. But, you know, congratulations on breaking that ass ceiling. I mean, Jesus, now you can be just like Gary. Congrats, Jess. I'm rooting for you, Jess. So also her name. I have to say it every week. You can't expect much from a person that you call. So. So, okay, so then Seline is called over by Rainbow again, and she's like, you wanted to speak? If you have a second, I would love to have a talk. Like, oh, my God, I thought we were done. You want to speak here? You want to speak here? You want to speak again? How many times you want to speak? Oh, my God, there's so much speaking.

[Ben]

I'm just trying to clear the air, bro. Because it's like, most of the time, it's, like, cool, but then, like, the rather, like, 23 hours and 57 minutes, it's just not cool. And I just would love us to get that three minutes where I can tolerate you per day. I would love to expand that out to at least, like, a good seven minutes. Can we do that?

[Ronnie]

Yeah, sometimes it's okay, but I don't know. What happened is the war. You talk to me like I'm your baby children.

[Ben]

Baby children. It's like, okay, well, can we just say try? Can't we try for a little more passion? Can we do this tomorrow? Like, tomorrow? Can we just try to be, like, to work better together? I'm like, rainbow, why are you. This is my problem with Rainbow is that she's like, that's it. No more Mrs. Nice Guy. I am gonna let her know how I really feel. And then she's like tomorrow, can we like try to make it work? Can we be better tomorrow? I'm like, rainbow, give it up.

[Ronnie]

Well, Rainbow wants to be friends with every. She wants to be liked ultimately. And I don't think it's just not.

[Ben]

Not.

[Ronnie]

It's not going to happen. So keep it curt. Celine, here's your things. You got them done, okay, you can go to bed. That's it. You don't need to have a whole discussion with people about every little thing. No is a full sentence.

[Ben]

Yeah. So a guest asks for a booby cake for tomorrow. Like a surprise booby cake, which I.

[Ronnie]

Don'T want that cake.

[Ben]

I don't think so.

[Ronnie]

Would you want that if you, okay, you just had cancer, you're about to get a double mastectomy. Okay. And her friend is like, well, my friend is about to lose her boobs, so let's make her a boob cake. Why the fuck would you do that? I don't want that. Listen, I just. What if I just lost all my money? I want someone to make me a money cake. That's. No, I don't want that. Don't. Don't make me that.

[Ben]

Yeah, I can't say, I can't say if I'd like it or not. Is it like owning the moment or is it like a brutal reminder? I'm not sure, but I also thought they got a like breast shaped cakes last episode too. Oh, they did, did they not? I thought so, but maybe it just was something that happened earlier in the season because this seems to be a relatively common request across reality TVs is boob cake.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, we've seen it before for sure. I mean, I know. Also my. For my 50th birthday I wanted a moob cake. So I got like some big hairy orbs for everybody to enjoy. No, I don't want that. You think I want to be reminded of my moobs?

[Ben]

Yeah. So anyway, that's the plan. Surprise cake. And then, then Kyle is talking to Barbara and he's like, celine doesn't. Oh. Because it's the second, second day of charter at 6am it's the morning everyone. And Kyle's like, Celine doesn't think that she's done to me what just did to her. And Barbara's like, that is not cool. Or as I like to say, that's not nice. So Kyle goes, not at all. But at least I'm getting a ride out of it. I need to keep, keep falling for women for sake. I have to stop falling for women all the Time. I'm like, yes. And we also need to stop having these storylines about Kyle and the woman he's falls for because it's been two seasons worth. And honestly, it's not. It's never been compelling for me.

[Ronnie]

Kyle, until you clean up your act and you're not just a shaky drunk, you're gonna be last choice. And that's just the way it is. And so Lane's not even lying. She's just like, well, you are all this left, so, well, until next week. And I make out with your best friend, but. Or your best friend, but for now, you're all. That's. You're my only option. Okay? So have fun. Only option. Kyle, clean up your act. You seem like a nice boy.

[Ben]

Yeah, I don't think the cleaning up is going to happen anytime soon.

[Ronnie]

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Grappens commercial.

[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

Oh my God, the boats are beautiful. They're so modern. The rooms are just so luxurious. I love all the colored lighting in there and the balconies.

[Ben]

I also just love that they are tailored for adult experiences. That makes me so happy.

[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

Learn more@virgin voyages.com or contact your travel advisor. So then Fraser goes and tells Anthony about the boob cake and everything. And Anthony is just like, let me survive launch and crew launch first and then you know it's going to be another story. So Anthony's just puttering around and then Damo and Kyle are. Are talking and just talking about how Kyle still has to keep his distance from the guests after he clearly had sex with the that other guys and then claim like it was a joke.

[Ronnie]

I mean, just. Just have your penis keep its distance. I think you're fine. You know, you're like squeegeeing the deck. Just stop sticking your penis in things. So then Jess and Barbara are eating and Jess is very tired. It's just. It's a Rainbow. She's like up to here with. So. So. And all this personal stuff aside, like you're really crap at your job and also you yelled at me, so I'm going to make your life hell now.

[Ben]

And Barbara's like, so. So she doesn't take anything serious, you know. And she goes, yes, she thinks it's a joke. It needs to be a point where you're held accountable so that way you feel the consequences of your actions. This is some bs.

[Ronnie]

You're not even on the. You're not even on the clean team, ma'. Am. You are a deck lady. So why don't you stay in your zone, Stay in your office.

[Ben]

Never even talked to Rainbow. Yeah, like no one talks to Rainbow. Like, Rainbow has no friends on this boat. Like I think they interface with her. They say hello, but no one has any meaningful conversations or bonding with Rainbow. So don't try to act like you're gonna take up on behalf of Rainbow.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. So Barbara's like, well, I'm the only one that work with Solene. She doesn't work enough. I mean, it's not a surprise. It's not A surprise. Like, it doesn't even bother me. Like, why would it be bothering Jesse?

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

So clearly it's not about work. You know, she sees. She sees that. So then the deck team is setting up the water toys, et cetera. And then Fraser is. The guests are eating breakfast and Fraser and Hugo are talking. So Fraser's like, well, today on the beach, I'm sending Rainbow and Celine because, you know, that'll work out. Well, here's what I do to choose people who hate each other. I put them alone on the island. Now call me Daddy.

[Ben]

If you could just tell your crew not to talk to her, sleep with her, walk anywhere near her, look in her direction, just ignore her presence entirely. Pretend like she's a piece of trash that's just washed up on the shore. Could they do that for me, please? That'd be so wonderful. Thank you.

[Ronnie]

So instead of managing his own crew, he's asking Hugo to manage his crew in a way that's not going to interact badly with you. It's just so. Come on, this is weak.

[Ben]

This is. And this. This is bad parenting, where you expect everyone else to make modifications for your devil child.

[Ronnie]

Right. And if it's that bad, then you should just go to the beach and do the beach job instead of. It's like going up to the saline.

[Ben]

Yeah. It's like going up to the farmer and saying, hey, I'm gonna bring my kid tomorrow. Could you not put out the little propeller thing for the flies? Otherwise he's gonna take it. It's like, like, no, you tell your kid not to take the propeller thing. So the farmer could.

[Ronnie]

Ben's really upset at that fly.

[Ben]

The lettuce.

[Ronnie]

Very upset.

[Ben]

I'm telling you, if you had seen it, if you had seen it, it was horrifying. Like, this kid was such a brat. And the dad, I mean, this dad was like six, three, towering over not just the kids, but most of people in the market. And he was like. He had just this, like, oh, look, like, well, there's nothing I can do. I was like, we tie the kid to a pole and chop and then untie him at the end and load him into the car. That's what you do at point.

[Ronnie]

You don't need a fly fan. You need a fly swatter for your child. Swat him on the head. My mom used to do it. That's. That was her. That was her, like, peaceful way of child abuse. She would just smack us with the fly swatter. You know, it wasn't a bat, so I guess she felt like she was a good mom. So. Yeah. Also, Fraser, if you feel like you're having trouble managing an employee, don't send them off to a fun beach day. Or why don't you go to the beach with Celine so you can train her? Like, if you're going to keep somebody that everybody else is pretty much agreeing is not trained well enough for this job, then go trainer. You know that you're putting Rainbow into a nervous breakdown. I mean, go trainer yourself, sir.

[Ben]

Yeah, I mean, I think there should be consequences. You told her not to take breaks. She took breaks all on the last episode. She does not get to go on a beach picnic. Now maybe, maybe a beach picnic is, I don't know, is that considered fun to go to or is it considered a pain in the ass? I'm not sure, probably.

[Ronnie]

But like if, but you know, they never get off the boat. So it's kind of like when you, when you're in prison. Like going into the prison yard is not a great yard. Right. But at least you're not in your cell.

[Ben]

Yeah. And you know, they all seem to love interacting with guests. I would not have sent her in the first place. I would have punished her. Like there should be repercussions to her. There should be consequences to her actions.

[Ronnie]

So, Carrie. All right, Captain, Carrie here, we're going to Saint Baths. We've got a very resource heavy die today with the beach picnic. Now let me tell you something about beach picnics. They're fun, they're gorgeous, they're glamorous, they can kill you. We could lose the entire cast today. If something happens, there could be a tsunami that we could put a rope down on top of a guest's brain. We never know what could happen on a beach picnic. Okay, calm it down. Just go to St. Barth's okay? It's gonna be fine.

[Ben]

Even worse. Even worse. Once we get to St. Bart's we're gonna have to mad more. That's right everyone. Countdown to med mooring is on. Watch out for med mooring. And did you know that 9 out of 10 Medmores end in a shipwreck when someone's played volleyball on a beach earlier in the day. This is a high stakes operation and I'm not gonna take it lightly.

[Ronnie]

Mid moors are difficult and the crew are going to be tired. And if they're off their game, it can severely impact what I do. If things go directly as planned, we're gonna. If things don't go exactly as planned, we're gonna be in severe trouble. Guest brains all over the beach. At the very least it'll be an adventure.

[Ben]

So Fraser goes up to Celine is like, okay, Rainbow is going with you and she's in charge. Just make sure you're helping her with anything she needs with service wise. And make sure that if anyone comes over and talks to you that you remind them that they're not supposed to talk to you. Thank you so much. What? So then Hugo now goes around and tells everyone, hey, Fraser's asked me to just while you're there, like, don't talk to Rainbow or don't talk to. So he'll distract her. Now this is why I don't like about Hugo. He should just say, when you're on the beach today, don't distract the. Don't distract the team because they've got to deal with the guests and we don't, we just don't want any distractions. Just say that. But he's also kind of like throwing Fraser under the bus. He's like, well, Fraser told me to tell you. I'm like, what sort of leader does that? Just say, okay, we want to, we're cutting down on the chit chat. I don't want to see you guys talking with the interior team because they've got to focus on the guests and there's been too many distractions this season. Like, do it that way. I think, I think he goes cop out.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, he does tattle it.

[Ben]

Yeah, it's a cop out at all.

[Ronnie]

Oh, sorry, go ahead.

[Ben]

No, I was gonna say sort of probably about what you're about to say is that like by saying, hey, Frazier told me to tell you. It kind of like loses a lot of authority too. Like people don't take it seriously. It's like, this isn't from me. I just have to tell you. And I just don't think that's a good leadership quality from Hugo either.

[Ronnie]

And saying stuff like, you know, don't talk to so so because he's worried about Rainbow and so so getting along and you know, she's flirting with boys, she's not pulling her weight. It's like, bro, those are like managerial things you had in a managerial discussion. You shouldn't go to the other employees and be like, wow, the boss hates her flirting with boys and na na na. It's like, that's not your business to be spread that. And also he's telling it to another bad employee, Damo, who's just a big fucking gossip and wants to start shit at every turn turn apparently, because that's all he's doing in the second half of the season. So he's really. This whole cast is ridiculous at this point. This whole cast is. Is full of at this point. So Damo is like, okay. I mean, it's impossible. It's not ideal, I suppose, that we don't get to talk to. So. So.

[Ben]

It'S not ideal. Well, just. Why does not ideal? I mean, like, how. How much. How much value are you getting out of. So. So at point this. This point anyway, out of your conversations with her.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, so they're all talking like, well, she can't do a job, and that's not our fault. And he's like, well, I don't care if she could do her job. That's someone else's problem. But I don't want any of you talking to her. That's it. Okay. So he's like, yeah, you know, she sucks, but if it'll make Frasier's life Fraser's. God, it's hard not to say Frasier, Fraser's life. And also, I'm gay, so I think my Z often turn into Jeff. So anyway, and because I was trained by Zsa Zsa, the gay icon. See, so the Z turns into Ja Blame Jaja. Okay, why can't.

[Ben]

Why. Okay, here's a question. Why can't we invent a new letter in our language that does the sound? I. I'm just so sick of. Is it Zs? Is it ZH? Is it there a J in there? Can we just create a new letter? Is this, like, the worst thing in the world if we create a new letter? Who says that we can't start a new letter up?

[Ronnie]

We've got so many people even know the Alphabet as it is. Like, we do. You know how many people can't read in America? I'm gonna look. I'm gonna look it up.

[Ben]

I know, but, like, why. But why do we have to punish those who do and who are just trying to find, like, better ways to express themselves? Like, I think we need, like, a dedicated letter. At the very least an accent. But, like, and I understand this messes up keyboards, so that's why. Maybe an accent's the better way to go option.

[Ronnie]

Do you know how long I had to wait for a keyboard with USB C? Like, it took a long time. Okay, so in 20.

[Ben]

So that's what I'm saying. Maybe an accent, an accent is good because you can press, like, the option button and then. And then like a little submit.

[Ronnie]

I don't even know the accents as they are. There's one that goes this way. There's one that goes that way.

[Ben]

But I'm saying let's. Let's just start a campaign, and we'll increase public awareness, and we'll know what the. Like, I think it should be like, a Z would like something on it, and. And, like, that will be our just sound going forward. Because you know what I hate is when you want to write as usual. Because, like, instead of saying, I'm going there as usual, or like, let's keep it real, cash, and you have to write, like, C, A, S, Z, H, and it just doesn't feel or look right. I'm done. I don't want to do it anymore. I want to pioneer a new accent so we can all be on the same page.

[Ronnie]

Okay, so in 2024, an estimated 21 of US adults are functionally illiterate. That's crazy. And you want add letters.

[Ben]

Well, they're not getting any better. I mean, like, it's not like that. It's not like the letter is going to be the thing that breaks them from being illiterate again.

[Ronnie]

We need, like I said, add grunts to the American language. We just need to start grunting at each other and pointing at things and rubbing our ballads. That's it. Let's go back to gr.

[Ben]

Just. I don't know. Why are we so locked in on what letters we can and can't have? Like, why can't we just add more letters? Why can't we add, like. Why can't there be like, a. Like a. Like a. Why can't we do this?

[Ronnie]

You want to really with people. Add a new number that's really gonna throw everything off.

[Ben]

That'll be like, be wild.

[Ronnie]

Come on. That would be amazing. All the smart people would be like, wait a minute. Everything's changed.

[Ben]

Okay, but the number is called Jevin. And you're like, how do you spell that?

[Ronnie]

Yeah, I know a kid named Jevin.

[Ben]

Actually, no, Jevin. Jevin.

[Ronnie]

Well, see, I would know that.

[Ben]

Use my new letter.

[Ronnie]

Wait a minute. You just won this argument. Okay, so now Rainbow. Now they're doing beach setup. And Rainbow's like, a lot of things drive me. One of my exes told me I wasn't ambitious enough for him. I mean, that guy. But also, I've seen success. I mean, look at me. I'm kind of like a heartless killer in the sense that if I really want something, I'll get it. No ifs, ands, or buts. It's my rainbow. You clean toilets. I mean, there's there's nothing like to look down on with that. I'm just saying you're acting like you just won a fucking Pulitzer, girl. Like you just cleaned shit off the toilet this morning.

[Ben]

That is hilarious. Yeah. No, but a lot of things drive me. And, and it really bothered me when my ex said that I wasn't ambitious. But to be fair, he was literally driving me at that moment because I said I. I didn't want to learn how to drive. So I guess there was something to it. The things do really technically drive me, but yeah, it's hilarious. I love it when I love it. Like, look, you're still. Look, she's cleaning toilets, but she is on a career path. She wants to move up. She wants to be a chief Stew someday. So, you know you can still be ambitious even when you clean toilets. Yeah, she is acting like she is. Is like a character on succession and totally.

[Ronnie]

You're not serious people. So Rainbow is talking to Kyle. He's like. She's like, so how are things going with you in. So. So he's like, oh, you want to use me, use me. I'm fine with being used. But. And then he tells Damo, but did you. Did you hear the guy say not to speak to her? And he's like, oh, yeah, we're not allowed to speak with her. Which sounds like a her problem and not a me problem. So I'm gonna go gossip about it and make it an everybody problem. It's gonna be amazing.

[Ben]

Yeah. So now they all tumble into the tender and head to the beach picnic and everything. And Rainbow's giving some orders about drink service and everything. And. And like almost pops a cork into Solene's eye. Etc. And Celine's like, oh, you tried to kill me already. She's like, yeah, I know. You just got here. Oh God, I didn't even think I could kill you with a cork. But now that you've opened up that possibility, so.

[Ronnie]

So. Or I'm going to start calling you bro. Bro. Bro. I would really like to start over. I did just poke you in the face with a cork, but I think it's. We need to just start over. Clean slate, bro. Clean slate. Okay. You want clean slate now? Fine. We have another clean slate. Well, I mean, what is this? So then Fraser is talking to Jess and asking about Solene and if anything's gonna happen with him after this season. And she's like, you know, I don't know. Like, sometimes I have a feeling that she has something still for Soso and he's like, honestly, I really don't think they do. Really? Because Jess is slowly breaking down because she's freaking out over Soleil. Like, she's acting like a maniac at this point. So I don't think Fraser has the best instincts as far as this stuff goes.

[Ben]

Yeah. And then he's like, so questioned, have you, you know, finger, finger, scissors, cigarettes he's trying to make. He starts doing all these, like, scissoring pantomimes and, like, all these weird little hand things. And Barbara's like, no, no, that's not nice what you're doing. No, no, we don't do that. And we don't. We can do them all at once. Okay. Doesn't have to, doesn't have to be, like, one after the other. It's okay.

[Ronnie]

Well, just as your boss, it's my job to know whether you're doing that or that this, none of this is there or is that little. None of this. Please stop doing that.

[Ben]

So Solene is talking to Damo on the beach, and she's like, I love the feeling to escape. And he's like, yeah, do you hate the feeling to work? Because you're like, chef, Both of you complain all the day about your job, but you choose your job. Like, oh, okay, okay, Demo, thanks for that. She's like, do you have problem with me, Demo? He goes, no way. And then he just, like, walks off.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, what the hell? I mean, look, I think this is why I came into this episode. Kind of being apologetic in her favor because I think they're kind of ganging up on her in this episode, and I really don't like it. Like, what the fuck? What she do to you? Damo, back off.

[Ben]

Yeah, I mean, look, I do think.

[Ronnie]

That, like, all the, all the, all the debt crew ganging up on Solane is weird.

[Ben]

Yeah. I, I also do think that, like, even if you are in different departments, if there's one person who's doing a really shitty job, the drama around that does sort of like, it sort of takes over the whole boat. So I understand that people from different departments can still be frustrated because they get dragged into stuff. Stuff. But also, Damon needs to relax. I know what you're talking about. Like, it, it was, it felt cruel. It felt cruel that it was like, like, everyone has to ignore this one person. I, I, I don't like that everyone has to change to make, to make Solane be better when Fraser could just tell Solane to be better. I do think that there is some value in saying, tell your Tell your department to stop distracting my people. I think you're allowed to say that, but it feels.

[Ronnie]

Well, they're making it such a big thing. They're making it like, oh, we can't speak to her because she's so immature. And now we all have to blah, blah, blah, blah. No, they're just saying, don't distract her while she's supposed to be. Well, actually, they're all making it this huge thing, you know?

[Ben]

Well, because Hugo did that.

[Ronnie]

Because the original directive was like, tell people not to, like, talk to Celine while she's working. Like, it was a kind of a simple thing. And they're making it into this huge, like, oh, now we can't talk to Solene. Well, that's the Lane's fault. Now we're mad at Selene because we're all being told we can't talk to Silane. It's like it's being turned. Like, oh, now we're being accused of doing something wrong. All they're saying is, don't distract the distractible child, for Christ's sake.

[Ben]

Yeah, you know what? They're all fucking idiots.

[Ronnie]

You don't have to beat her ass.

[Ben]

Just idiots. They're all idiots on a boat.

[Ronnie]

I know. And why don't I get mad at every little thing? I mean, that's like a personal thing with me. I could never have that job. I would just be furious all the time. Because I am now. Well, this is me happy all the time. So imagine me doing that.

[Ben]

But we get to be furious while sitting down, and they don't. They have to be furious and wiping things.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Thank the Lord for chairs. I mean, there's so much to be grateful for in this world. The most grateful I am Chairs. I just love chairs. I love them so much. Even uncomfortable ones. I love them.

[Ben]

Them. I think Amy Grant should rewrite her seminal song Hats and turn it into Chairs. Chairs. Why do I got to have so many chairs in my life? It's a great song.

[Ronnie]

I l. Big chairs and I cannot.

[Ben]

Lie no other brother can deny When a chair rolls in with an itty bitty.

[Ronnie]

There you go. You're getting it. Now wait.

[Ben]

When a chair walked in with an itty bitty waist and you get sprung.

[Ronnie]

Okay, you're closer.

[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

So Hugo is, he's like, I've talked to Kyle a few times and I can tell he had a very difficult upbringing. And we all have this drive to be better than we're.

[Ben]

Wow. You looked at Kyle and saw like the, the tire mark on his face because like a, a truck ran over him because he was drunk and passed out on the road and thought, wow, this guy had a tough upbringing. What part about like his perpetual black eye bruises from getting into bar brawls and what part about like the strange chickenpox he has on his face at all times tells you that this guy had an easy upbringing? Geez.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. And oh, Instagram wall. It's Hugo. He's like, I grew up in a pretty rough part of New York. It wasn't pretty and it wasn't nice. So we left when I was 10 because my dad didn't want me growing up in that lifestyle. You left because your dad was getting in trouble for knocking on doors in the Bronx. And let's not pretend it's for any other reason, because you cannot just be pulling that shit in New York City. Okay?

[Ben]

No, no, no.

[Ronnie]

Where did he grow up? He says it wasn't pretty and it wasn't nice, but he doesn't specify where it was. And I felt defensive for New York.

[Ben]

He's like, south Street Seaport.

[Ronnie]

He's like, I grew up on 61st and 2nd, and it was a horror show.

[Ben]

I grew up upstairs from Cipriani's. And let me tell you something, One horror after another.

[Ronnie]

Who can even spell that? I had to move. I felt very defensive for New York. I mean, you know, give New York a break, Hugo. Hugo's just badmouthing everybody today.

[Ben]

He really is. He needs to get over it.

[Ronnie]

I think that's one of his worst memories of growing up in New York. He goes, you know what I remember police sirens.

[Ben]

Oh, oh, oh, really?

[Ronnie]

These sirens open.

[Ben]

These sirens. Oh, God. Do you want to know something, Hugo? While I was literally watching this scene, his monologue, I was also listening to a helicopter overhead with a searchlight, scanning the neighborhood for someone who had tried to break into someone's house. Yeah. Because I looked it up on the Internet and I was his house. I will say this. I guess I'll say this. Bose. Bose lives very close to me, as it turns out, because I've done some Internet stalking and I'm really good at it. And there was. The helicopter was overhead for a very long time. And I was like, what is happening in the neighborhood? And I looked it up and I saw it was like 12 minutes ago, someone trying to break into someone's house. And I looked up where it was and I was like. And I did some cross referencing. I was like, that's Bose's house. Was someone trying to break into Bose's house? But I don't know. I don't know if she still lives there. She probably moved out since she's now on a TV show. But I'm just gonna say. I've just listen. I've just gotta say, Hugo, some of us live in real crime zones.

[Ronnie]

I know.

[Ben]

I guess we're real housewives. Houses get. Get that maybe like their alarms go off, helicopters come.

[Ronnie]

Just living in big cities, I guess, listening to somebody being like, I had to move. We heard a siren. It's like, oh, wow. Move to the suburbs, dude, And. And listen to leaf blowers all day and tell me what you'd prefer, because I'd much rather siren. Okay. At least I. Why are we not just criminals around? Like, the Fucking leaf blowers do. At least the police come and pick people up. Probably the wrong people half the time, but at least they're not just blowing them around the yard like the leaf blowers. Useless leaf blower.

[Ben]

The most hilarious rant. I cannot believe we are ranting at this guy because he would hear gunshots and sirens outside. We're like, get over it. He had, like, all the reasons.

[Ronnie]

We both live in places where we hear gunshots and sirens, and we think it's. Yeah, we know, like, listening to somebody else being like, oh, my God, I heard a police siren. Shut up.

[Ben]

Yes. But I'm gonna say this is just purely because we're annoyed at Hugo, because, like, honestly, it could have been really bad. There's a difference. Hearing a police siren in one neighborhood versus another. And, like, when he said he lived in a rough neighborhood of New York, I believe it. I just don't want to hear it from him. I don't want to hear it right now.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, he's just annoying me. So I'm not gonna. I'm gonna. About every single thing he says. That's it. I'm not gonna get. I'm not gonna let him give himself a victim. Edit on my watch. Police sirens out of here. I heard somebody yesterday trying to play two notes from a rap song over and over again for two and a half hours at the top of the volume. Okay, that was two notes. It was like, some plinky, like, song. And they just kept playing it over, and they were playing the song, and then the piano was, like, trying to play over the song. I was like, oh, my God. It's too n. It's too nuts. I almost marched over there and played it myself. I was like, come on.

[Ben]

You know, as a wise man once said, they not like us. They not like us.

[Ronnie]

So he left because of police sirens, and he remembers hearing gunshots. Okay, well, gunshots are worse. Okay?

[Ben]

So, I mean, gunshots. Listen, who hasn't heard a gunshot here and there? Am I right? Dead. Yes. Suck it up, Hugo.

[Ronnie]

Maybe I should have. Maybe I should have finished reading the paragraph before I went off for 10 minutes about what a wuss he was.

[Ben]

Cause.

[Ronnie]

Okay, okay.

[Ben]

And I co. Signed just because it was fun to co. Sign with you.

[Ronnie]

So he's like, who knows if I would even have gone to university? I mean, people in New York, they don't go to school. I mean, who knows if I would have gotten into yachting, you know? And I think that if Kyle wants to be better, then great. He's trying to figure himself out on who he is and where he fits in. Okay, well, that's good. So you're very forgiving of Kyle because he might have had a rough childhood. So it's okay that he's, like, wasted to the point of shaking half the time and sticking his dick in big Ang. But Celine talking a little bit too much is going to send you over the fucking edge. I see you. I see you. Siren. Scaredy cat.

[Ben]

If you're raised in a tough neighborhood, you stay in the tough neighborhood and you stick it out. Yeah, God forbid you try to make your life better.

[Ronnie]

I'm not saying any of that. I'm not saying not make your life better. I'm just saying, come on.

[Ben]

I know there's people that are starving.

[Ronnie]

Kim.

[Ben]

I mean, also, you know that this is probably, like, when he was talking about his neighborhood growing up. This is probably spliced from some interview from several weeks ago that the editor just put in here to try to give some context as to why he was, like, being nice to Kyle. And, like, you know, they make it sound like, well, I grew up in a bad neighborhood and I had to leave, and I feel bad for Kyle because he had to grow up in a rough, rough place. And, like, they probably just spliced two concepts together.

[Ronnie]

I think it was one of those interviews where they were like, listen, this season is all about grandparents, grandparent, trauma. Do you have a dead grandparent? Do you have a grandparent that died horribly? We. Every cast member needs to share something about. He's like, no, but I did hear sirens and gunshots when I was young. They're like, that's it. Okay, going to take that. Could you just make it that the gunshots might have killed one of your grandparents, please? Really need to fit it into the season.

[Ben]

Was your grandparent. Did that. Did. Did your grandfather drive a patrol car?

[Ronnie]

No.

[Ben]

Okay, can we say. So we say those sirens where your.

[Ronnie]

Grandmother just say, kyle stuck his dick inside of your grandmother over a police car while people were shooting in the background. Could we just maybe just it. Just. Just it. Okay. We're using the new letter for that. Okay. That's a new letter. That's why he didn't understand the directions.

[Ben]

He was like, I was so confused. What the. When I got the email about what I was supposed to say, I didn't really understand the Z and the H. I was like, who? And then there's a J at the end. Zahuja.

[Ronnie]

Okay, so Soline has a big knife, a big chef's knife, and she's like, oh, we wash this knife, huh? How do we wash? And Rainbow goes in the ocean and she goes, I'm professional washer, I would wash in the ocean. It is natural. So she's just carrying this big thing and then puts it blade facing up towards her in her belt. Rainbow's like, bro, why are you putting sand on that? Bro, bro, please don't put the knife in your pants, bro.

[Ben]

She's washing with sand, which is like, cannot be good for the knife. Also like with her bare fingers, like that's a chef's knife. Like that. She was just like massaging it like a, like a genie's lamp. Lamp. And it's like you're gonna slice yourself. And then the fact that she puts it in her belt like a holster, but then she drops something so she has to bend over but like avoid this knife sticking out of her. I was like, you are, you could like literally kill yourself. That knife could just slice your wrist in one second and then you're done.

[Ronnie]

See, that's why I don't give Celine too much shit. Because Celine is one of those people that you see walking around and you're like, you know what, they're still alive. More power to them because you know, survival of the fittest, etc, like this in nature. Like let's say even a hundred years ago she would have been dead in a week. So good for her. She's a survivor. That's what I say.

[Ben]

Yeah, yeah, okay, well good for her. She, that was a crazy scene, her washing that knife and then putting it in. Like her belt was actively horrifying, but she did survive. And then they, everyone goes back and Fraser's like, hello, everyone, welcome back. We've got a nice little refreshing raspberry vodka treat. It's not too strong. And then we're going to head to port and then we're going to also go. We're gonna maximize experience. Just stay here and you can watch the sunset. And they're like, okay, so they're gonna be heading to St. Bart's soon. And so Carrie's like, all right everyone, I hope you didn't get too fatigued serving lunch today because we'll be doing some med ball in Saint Botts, right? It's very scary. The guys will tell us where to put the anchor, so just keep on telling me where it needs to be because this med moor is going to be a med more not a medless idea. Follow.

[Ronnie]

The biggest two things that all captains fear in the Caribbean is going through that bridge and Toying up in Saint Boss. In Saint Boss, all mooring is what's called Med mooring. It's where you put two anchors and you go back to the dock. There's a lot of vessels in there all jam packed. The lines in the water, I could run over a person could fall slightly in. They could lose their hand or their head. One of them could hit a coral reef, which would knock one of the pieces out over the boat, land on someone, and gouge their eye out. Anyone could die in men mooring season. God damn it.

[Ben]

We go.

[Ronnie]

We're gonna draw Red warring.

[Ben]

The two scariest things in the Caribbean. A small Bridge in St. Martin. Med Mooring in St. Potts. And also if Captain Glenn is nearby. Just Captain Glenn. We are trying to avoid him. You know, lots of accidents.

[Ronnie]

Or Jason really half the captains in this franchise.

[Ben]

Let's face it.

[Ronnie]

It terrifying. Terrifying to be at a wheel.

[Ben]

Yeah. We used. We actually used to be quite afraid of the Kraken eating ships uphole. But then one day, Captain Glenn actually crashed into the Kraken and the cracking actually died. So that was helpful. Don't. We don't worry about the Kraken anymore. But. But yeah, there are some other concerns that we have.

[Ronnie]

I don't know if you saw it on the news. Can we roll the footage? I love when they just kept rolling the footage of Jason crashing into that restaurant.

[Ben]

Jason, that was the best.

[Ronnie]

Wasn't it? A restaurant that he crashed into? Why do I have that? He crashed into a dock or something. Okay. With the wet. From a restaurant.

[Ben]

It was shot from a. From a restaurant.

[Ronnie]

Oh, okay. All right. Once we get both anchors out, make sure they're slack. Very important. Or bring the boat aft. You're gonna give me distances. Do not talk to Saline. All right, now, you'll have interior staff or defenders. This is where they'll be most important. If I drift into a boat, fenders are where I need to be. Let's get the sinkers up. Let's boogie. Let's not die.

[Ben]

Hold on. I've got a transmission with St. B.S. all right, this is St. David. St. David to St. Boss, this is.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, I'm here. This is Captain Sandy. Okay.

[Ben]

All right. I just want to make an alert to everyone in Saint Bar, okay. When we arrive at Drive Med.

[Ronnie]

Boring.

[Ben]

No one on the island is to talk to Solane. Do you copy?

[Ronnie]

I really don't know who Solene is. I can tell you this. You've said Med Moore so much that I'm back and ready to give you some more, Med. Okay, so good luck with you. I've just dry cleaned my two pairs of capri pants that I bring on the show, and so I'm ready to go. Just. Just don't die.

[Ben]

All right, well, Captain Sandy, before I hand this off to you, the below deck thing, please go tell your. Your friend Norma. That Med Moore? More like Med Poor. That's Norma. You can judge that one up.

[Ronnie]

Sorry, Norma. Norma's not speaking to me right now because I didn't invite someone named Goerdi to a dinner on a boat. That's. Norma's still. Still pretty upset with that go.

[Ben]

Ready? More like go, weirdo. I'll talk to you later.

[Ronnie]

I mean, bloop. So.

[Ben]

What about the customary sign off? And now he wants me to tell everyone about Solene. He won't even do the bloop.

[Ronnie]

So they lift the anchor and they depart. We have a short stay leading, five o'. Clock. Anchor chain straight up and down. Anchor chain straight up and down. Anchor in the pocket. That is the consequence of my actions.

[Ben]

All right, we're going. We're heading to St. Bot, so. Interior, radio silence, please.

[Ronnie]

Why is no one talking on the radios? Why is no one talking? I need some commun. You just said radio silence. God damn it. I've put myself in a real quad meer here.

[Ben]

I was just making commentary about the future of legacy media. Radio silence.

[Ronnie]

So.

[Ben]

It'S like. He's like, all right, all right, all right, Jess, what do you see out there? She's like, I see consequences. I see actions.

[Ronnie]

No.

[Ben]

Okay, listen. I don't care about the gray boat. I only care about relentless. I was too relentless. I was relentless about my own personal. No, there's a boat called relentless. I don't want to hear about your thoughts about being relentless.

[Ronnie]

Distance to relentless.44 oh.4 oh meters. Captain, we're going to be dropping anchors between Two yellow boys. 10 meters between two yellow boys.

[Ben]

Copy. It's buoys. It's buoys. Please remember it's buoys, not boys who makes a big difference. Bridge. Bridge, Bridge. Your CERN is now passing the center of the ship. Bridge. Bridge. Bridge. Bridge.

[Ronnie]

Dropping Inka. Dropping anchor. Dropping anchor. Don't test the settings.

[Ben]

Where's my. Was my sitting okay?

[Ronnie]

Meters closing. Slowly. Oh. A bit of the coral reef has floated off and has just landed into a guest skull. Gouging her eye out.

[Ben]

There's a starfish on my head right now. Could someone please help me? The sawfish came up with the anchor.

[Ronnie]

Help me, Big Ange from The last chart has come to find a penis.

[Ben]

Ah.

[Ronnie]

She has. She has been strangled by one of the mooring ropes.

[Ben]

There's a xenomorph on board. Everyone, I hate to tell you something happened terribly with the med boring and now there's a xenomorph and we've heard that Hugo has now been. Has now been killed. Is everyone okay? Everyone's safe.

[Ronnie]

I've been decapitated. Captain. I can't see anything anymore. My. I can only see my body on the other side of the Inca.

[Ben]

Is there any way that we can transplant Jess's brain into a synthetic body so we can save her and have we can rename her after a Peter Pan character and she can continue on guarding us into port.

[Ronnie]

Oh, never mind. I put it back on. Okay. We made it. All right. We're safe. God, thank God. That could have been terrible.

[Ben]

All right. Turns out actually there was no damage and no aliens on board. Congratulations, everyone.

[Ronnie]

Everything's fine. Everything's fine. All right. Talk that one up a little bit. But you know what? It's sweep season. Season, I think. Do we still have that or like. Right. Hugo, radio somebody, would ya? He's like, hold on to engines. Oh, God, we're still doing this. Never mind. Okay. It's over.

[Ben]

It just goes on. Of course. Everything's fine.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, everything.

[Ben]

The number one rule of below deck is that if they're gonna crash into something, it's gonna be in the trailer. That's we know. I still remember the dock crumbling on camera with Captain Glenn.

[Ronnie]

Hello there. This is a two part recap. Okay, this is. That's the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two.

[Ben]

Watch what crap. INS would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. It's always a party on Allison Block.

[Ronnie]

Our way is the Amber way.

[Ben]

It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Auto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap.

[Ronnie]

Get on the right foot with Chris. He offered. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniella Etchels. We never miss her call. It's Diane call.

[Ben]

Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no Trickolus Hava Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go. We all go for Hugo. Jamie. She has no less namey.

[Ronnie]

She's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer. Sipped some scotch with Jessica Trots.

[Ben]

She's our favorite streamer Caroline Peacock, Kristen.

[Ronnie]

The Piston Anderson Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B. Que sera, sera, Whatever will be will Lauren Silsby.

[Ben]

Bringing the funk It's Leslie Plunkett she.

[Ronnie]

Gets an A from us It's Lindsey D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisalino Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry we love her on the rocks It's Melissa Cox Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the.

[Ben]

Berg this is is living with Michelle.

[Ronnie]

Vivian I love a YA Olivia Williamson Tastier than Flanderson. It's Rachel Manderson.

[Ben]

She sure is swell.

[Ronnie]

It's Raquel, yes we can.

[Ben]

It's Savannah Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman let's share with Sharon Eldridge Darn.

[Ronnie]

Skippy, it's Tippy and our super premium sponsors She's VVIP It's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin somebody.

[Ben]

Get us 10cc's of Betsy MD we're.

[Ronnie]

Taking the gold with Brenda Silva let's.

[Ben]

Get real with Caitlin o' Neal don't.

[Ronnie]

Get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs it's our queen.

[Ben]

It's Queen Laifa Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall Hail the cork master the master the of of the cork Jennifer Corcoran we got our wish. It's Jen Plish she's not harsh She's Jill Hirsch My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod Shadley in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock G It's Lisa H. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron she's a whiz It's Liz Sarthy always killing it It's Lola Al Kalani.

[Ronnie]

The incredible edible Matthew S. Sisters she eases our woes it's Melissa St. Rose there's a chance of meatballs It's Rebecca Cloud neat. It's Ronit Feldman she's the queen bee It's Sarah Lemke we cannot tell a lie It's Sarah Tell of son Shannon.

[Ben]

Out of a cannon Anthony, please don't stop at solely and pop let's take off with Tamla playing It's always a.

[Ronnie]

Good time when you're wasting time with Bravo she ain't no shrinking violence Violet Coutar we love you guys if you like, watch what crappens you can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.

[Nick Cannon]

It'S your man Nick Cannon and I'm here to bring you my new podcast, Nick Cannon at Night. I've heard y' all been needing some advice in the love department, so who better to help than yours truly? Nah, I'm serious. Every week I'm bringing out some of my celebrity friends and the best experts in the business to answer your most intimate relationship questions. Having problems with your man? We got you catching feelings for your sneaky link. Let's make sure it's the real deal first. Ready to bring toys into the bedroom? Let's talk about it. Consider this a non judgment zone to ask your questions when it comes to sex and mind dating in relationships, friendships, situationships and everything in between. It's gonna be sexy, freaky, messy. And you know what? You'll just have to watch the show. So don't be shy, join the conversation and head over to YouTube to watch Nick Cannon at Night or subscribe on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast. Want to watch episodes early and ad free? Join Wondery plus right now.