#3021 RHOC S19E13 Part 1: Seriously Funny

Summary

Watch What Crappens

Episode #3021 – RHOC S19E13: "Seriously Funny" (Part 1)

Date: October 3, 2025
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam

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Episode Overview

In this jam-packed installment, Ben and Ronnie recap the hilariously messy 13th episode of Real Housewives of Orange County Season 19. They roast, analyze, and lovingly lampoon the cast’s antics, with a focus on Tamra’s latest victim spiral, Heather Dubrow’s intimidating style, Jen’s purse superstitions, and a scene-stealing Mayo Clinic improv riff. This episode is filled with witty banter, Bravo deep cuts, notable flashbacks (including the infamous cake bow scene), and a comedic send-up of Housewives logic and dysfunction.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Groundlings and Improv Aspirations

[03:09–04:47]

• Ronnie shares his Groundlings improv school experience—he went through all the classes but didn’t get to be an official member.
• Ben ponders trying out improv himself, inspired by Heather Dubrow’s pursuit, wrestling with the “Am I too old?” question.
• Quote:

  "This is the youngest you're ever gonna be, okay? So do whatever the fuck you want to."
  —Ronnie, [04:15]

2. Heather Dubrow: The Intimidating Diva

[06:20–07:31]

• Ben admits he’s moved from annoyed to enamored with Heather, especially admiring how she “tears into” people with frightening precision.
• They describe her signature moves: claw hands, lip curls, and an underbite that signals impending doom.
• Quote:

  “There’s something about the way Heather does it. The way she curls her lips inwards and she gets her claw hands out and she starts poking them.”
  —Ben, [07:06]

3. Tamra’s Eternal Victimhood and Schemes

[06:17–08:30]

• The hosts revel in Tamra’s familiar playbook: quitting scenes for dramatic effect, rehashing old drama (over a 12-year-old rumor she had sex with Nelson from the pop band).
• Even her dramatic storm-outs have become routine—this time, with a twist:

  "But this time, she does it in a floral dress. So it’s new. And I just love it.”
  —Ronnie, [08:02]

4. Purse-on-the-Floor Superstition & Heather’s Shady Wit

[09:01–09:37]

• Jen considers putting her purse on the floor; Heather warns her that’s why she’s broke, launching a running gag about superstitions and luck.

• “That’s why you’re broke. You don’t appreciate what you have, you leave it on the floor. God senses it and he refuses to send you more purses.”
  —Ronnie, [09:29]

5. Shannon Beador & the Mayo Clinic Improv Saga

[13:09–15:16]

• Shannon’s ever-helpful (and unintentionally overbearing) medical advice becomes comedy gold as Ben and Ronnie riff on her recommending the Mayo Clinic for everything.

• A long, escalating improv about mayo, mayonnaise alternatives, and calling the “clinic” for food advice leaves the hosts in stitches.

• Quotes:

  "Oh, looks like they’ve got a slot for me at the Mayo Clinic. Yes, hello, this is Shannon Beador. Yes, I'm calling about...So my mayo, I'm not sure if it's still good anymore. Can I bring it into the clinic?"
  —Shannon (impersonated by Ben), [13:39]

  "Hello, Mayo Clinic. I am at a sushi restaurant and everything here is overdosing in mayo. It is overdosing. Why do we need this in the California roll?"
  —Heather, [15:01]

6. Tamra Reframes History: Pranks, Human Shields, and Carjacking

[17:01–17:46]

• Discussion of Tamra’s claim that hiding behind Gina during a mock attack was “just a prank,” when they recall she clearly used Gina as human shield:

  "No, you thought you were gonna get attacked, so you literally jumped behind Gina and pushed her in front of you...It's not a prank."
  —Ronnie, [17:13]

7. Heather vs. Tamra: Betrayal & Hypocrisy

[24:01–25:25]

• Tamra accuses Heather of not “having her back,” despite Heather often defending Tamra, which the rest of the cast critiques her for. Hosts call out Tamra’s "hypocrite castle."

• "Literally, you have this entire cast saying, heather, you are like, why do you keep defending Tamra? Are you scared of her? Like, that's the storyline for Heather this season."
  —Ben, [25:48]

8. Heather's Comedy Ambitions Under Fire

[38:22–41:27]

• Shannon reveals to the group Heather’s comedic aspirations. Gina and Emily are skeptical—cue Heather’s notorious “Coraline’s mother” glare.

• "Every time someone challenges Heather about being funny, she returns with, like, the Coraline mom's face."
  —Ben, [38:48]

• Heather, undeterred, insists that even humorless people can take comedy classes, riffing about buying the audience if need be.

• "Honestly, I could be the most humorless person in the world. And if I want to take stand up comedy classes, then I will buy each and every audience member and make them laugh. Okay?”
  —Heather, [41:01]

9. Gina and Emily: Parenting, Red Flags & School System Drag

[49:15–52:50]

• Emily opens up about her son’s learning disability, wondering how nobody (including the school) caught it sooner. The hosts riff on their own reading experiences and the challenges of parenting.

• “It takes a village to teach a child not to read all the time.”
  —Ronnie, [52:43]

10. Jen’s Son’s Tattoo & Parenting Worries

[45:08–48:35]

• Jen’s son Dawson gets a (somewhat inexplicable) tattoo of four sevens before leaving for the Marines. Jen’s nerves and the anxiety of impending deployment are handled with a mix of empathy and comedy.

• “My heart kind of broke for her… it must be absolutely nerve wracking to send your child off to the military.”
  —Ben, [45:57]

• Dawson nearly passes out mid-tattoo, but the hosts riff that "it happens all the time" in tattoo shops.

11. The Infamous Cake Bow/Bowgate Returns

[55:04–55:37]

• The gluten-free cake artist returns—cue flashbacks to Heather’s iconic rage at someone eating the bow off her cake.

• “That woman came into my home, took the bow off of my cake and ate it. You have defiled my cake.”
  —Heather (impersonated by Ronnie), [55:06]

12. Gretchen’s Easter Photo Shoots & Shade at Tamra

[56:06–57:26]

• While Tamra throws her Spring Fling, Gretchen is off with Slade and their daughter doing an elaborate Easter shoot — in August. Shannon checks in with Gretchen, mostly to stir up anti-Tamra sentiment.

• "Time for our Easter photoshoot...even holding a bunny. You know, this poor bunny is just looking like, God, just kill me already. Like, just turn me into mittens already. Get me out of here."
  —Ronnie, [56:12]

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• Ben, on getting into improv:
  “I worry that my time has passed, but…Heather Dubrow, she’s throwing herself right in the ring.”
  [03:54]

• Ronnie, on Tamra quitting every year:
  "How many times this season has she been like, 'I quit. I’m not doing this anymore. Last time ever filming anything every year.'"
  [07:56]

• Mayo Clinic Improv Blows Up:
  “Hello, Mayo Clinic. I am at a sushi restaurant and everything here is overdosing in mayo. It is overdosing. Why do we need this in the California roll? Why? Why?”
  —Heather (impersonation), [15:01]
  (This bit runs approx [13:11–15:16], multiple hilarious improv call-ins.)

• Gina, on returning clothes:
  “I thought this one pretty, but I put it on, and I felt bad. I feel bad because I want to support your stool, but it turns out I can’t afford this, so I’m just gonna say it’s broken.”
  [31:10–31:28]

• Heather’s stand-up rebuttal:
  "Do I have to read my IMDb all over again?"
  [39:53]

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• 03:09 — Improv & Groundlings stories
• 06:17 — RHOC intro: Tamra, Heather, ensemble shade
• 09:01 — Purse-on-the-floor/money superstition
• 13:09 — Shannon’s Mayo Clinic running gag
• 17:01 — Carjacking/prank/human shield debate
• 24:01 — Tamra vs. Heather & hypocrisy
• 38:22 — Heather’s comedy class under fire
• 45:08 — Jen’s son’s tattoo
• 49:15 — Emily’s son, learning disability, and school issues
• 55:04 — Cake bow/Bowgate flashback
• 56:06 — Gretchen’s Easter photo shoot/spring fling shade

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Overall Tone & Takeaways

The episode is a whirlwind of rapid-fire jokes, Bravo in-jokes, and affectionate (sometimes savage) mockery. Ben and Ronnie maintain their signature irreverent, playful tone throughout, mixing nostalgia with sharp character analysis and plenty of tangential improv, especially around Housewives' eccentricities and reality TV absurdities. Listeners will finish this recap with a fresh appreciation for the comedy—both intentional and not—of Orange County’s finest.

For the rest of the recap, tune in to Part 2!

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[End of Part 1 Recap]

Transcript

[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, people don't realize that Ronnie really is an excellent host and he really goes all out when he throws a party. So now I understand his trick. He goes to Wayfair and he makes everything look nice.

[Ronnie Caram]

All all of my outdoor is done in Wayfair. Half of my indoor is done in Wayfair and trust me, probably it'll be 75% by the end of this ad. I'll be on shopping by the end of this read.

[Ben Mandelaker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

When it comes to what romance you're into, you can't be pinned down unless you want to be. Here's your invitation to have it all.

[Ronnie Caram]

Fancy a dalliance with a duke or.

[Heather Dubrow]

Perhaps a sexy billionaire?

[Ronnie Caram]

Find a book boyfriend in the city and another on the hockey field.

[Shannon Beador]

Or.

[Ronnie Caram]

Or if nothing on this earth satisfies, you can always find love in another realm.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Hear modern rom coms from authors like Lily Chu and Ali Hazelwood, the latest romantasy series from Sarah J. Maas and Rebecca Yarros, and Regency favorites like Bridgerton and Outlander. Plus all the really steamy stuff.

[Ronnie Caram]

Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30 day trial at audible.com crappins. That's audible.com crappins.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Hello and welcome to Watch what's Crappin? It's a podcast about all that crap on Bravo. We love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelaker, and here with me today, as always, is someone who's not just a co host, someone who's not just a wonderful man, but someone who is a comedic actor. Ronnie Caram. How are you? You actually are a comedic actor.

[Heather Dubrow]

Oh, I've actually gone through the Groundlings. I had to audition for it. Great.

[Ben Mandelaker]

You actually are. You are a Groundlings alum, and you are a comedic actor, but.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, I don't think I'm a Groundlings alum because I think you have to be in the Groundlings to be. I just went through. I didn't get accepted.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Oh, that doesn't count as being in it.

[Ronnie Caram]

No, I went through all the classes. I went through all the levels. And, you know, at the end, you do a show and then they all judge you.

[Heather Dubrow]

They're like, you're too fat for this.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then I'm like, okay, bye. But no, they didn't say I was too fat for it, obviously, but I didn't make it. So. Not bitter at all. Every time I passed there, I spit on them.

[Heather Dubrow]

I spit on them and all their children.

[Ronnie Caram]

No, I'm just kidding.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I want to go take classes at the Groundlings. I think I said this before when Heather. Heather said she was taking classes at the Groundlings. It's like it sort of has, like, awoken a thing of, like, maybe I should take classes at the Groundlings. I mean, if Heather De Bro can do it. I. I've always wanted to take improv classes. I haven't. I. I worry that my. My time has passed, but. But then again, Heather De Bro, she's. She's throwing herself right in the ring. So maybe I could be.

[Ronnie Caram]

This is what I tell myself every day. Ben, you're never going to. This is the youngest you're ever gonna be, okay? So do whatever the fuck you want to. That's what I said.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I could be able to do it.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's fun.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I could be at a musical at the Groundlings, couldn't I? I could be funny.

[Ronnie Caram]

You are funny. You don't need some Groundling to tell you you're funny. But they are good classes. They're really fun classes. So I would do it. And listen, you know, I love anything that encourages wig use. So true.

[Ben Mandelaker]

That is literally so anything that's like.

[Ronnie Caram]

Have a wacky voice and here's a wig. I'm in. I might go do it again. I'll go through the whole thing again. I doing it until I'm 100 years old. I had a great time. But anyway, we're not here to talk about our dead dreams, okay? We're here to talk about the dying dreams of Real Housewives.

[Ben Mandelaker]

That's right. On Monday, everyone. Do not forget that we have. Wait, is this Monday? It's crappy hour. Yes, we have crappy hour. So get yourself excited about that. And on Patreon, you can join us patreon.com watchall crappens weekly bonus episodes. This week, on our bonus episode, we did something very fun. Very, very, very fun, which is that we watched with love, Megan, and we tore it apart. That was a delight. So go join us for that.

[Shannon Beador]

And then we also have our video.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Component, which you can get on [e-mail] Watch what happens. And then after a week, those videos go onto YouTube and you should follow us on YouTube, by the way, because YouTube is fun.

[Ronnie Caram]

So also, that is thec is returning this week, so don't forget to watch it because that will be back on Monday rotation here at watch what happens, which means Miami is moving up. So you should be getting a Miami.

[Heather Dubrow]

Recap even earlier this week.

[Ronnie Caram]

So check that out.

[Heather Dubrow]

And thanks for being here.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Thanks for being here, everyone. Okay, so now let's get into this Orange county episode, not so funfetti. I was actually cracking up. This episode. I was cracking up.

[Ronnie Caram]

Great episode.

[Ben Mandelaker]

They were so ridiculous.

[Ronnie Caram]

Also, great one.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I mean, Tamara was doing the pure Tamra victim thing. Emily was. Emily was. Emily and Gina were actually being, like, entertaining to me for the most part, as much as they can be. And what I loved, you know, I've really grown to love Ms. Dubrow. You know, there was a time when I really hated Heather Dubrow, and I really.

[Ronnie Caram]

When. When was that? You've always loved Heather Dubro.

[Shannon Beador]

No, there were times, like, you know.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Many seasons ago, I didn't. There were times I'd be like, she's the worst. But I've. It's more like I've. I was. I've gone from, like, amused to, like, I'm trying to teeter into love. And I just. I just love when she gets mad at someone because really, like, really, no one tears into someone the way Heather debrow does. I'm not saying she tears into someone better or worse. I'm just saying her style of it is so Heather debrow. Because when she tears into you it is terrifying. There's no one who I actually consider as terrifying. There are people. I'm like, oh, don't mess with them. Like, don't mess with Kenya. Don't mess with Portia. Don't mess with Dorinda. But there's something about the way Heather does it. The way she curls her lips inwards and she. She gets her claw hands out and she starts poking them.

[Ronnie Caram]

She pushes her chin out like she gives herself severe underbite.

[Tamara]

You were mean to me.

[Ronnie Caram]

Her eyes get really dark. You start seeing the smoke in her eyes as they just darken up like Coraline's mother. I mean, it is terrifying and so funny. And they've all had. They've all had it with Tamara's. And Tamara's trying her old tricks over and over, and they're just not working anymore. And it's so funny. I mean, how many times this season has she been like, I quit.

[Gretchen]

I'm not doing this anymore. Last time ever filming anything every year.

[Ronnie Caram]

But this time, she does it in a floral dress. So it's new. And I just love it. I love that everyone was like, oh, shut up. Like, they didn't even take the cakes then. They didn't even take the cakes.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Well, maybe I should name this episode that Takes the Cake.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think you should name it Some Left.

[Gretchen]

My Cake.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I was gonna call it Seriously Funny. So we start off.

[Ronnie Caram]

We.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Orange county is doing this new thing. Well, not new thing, but they just do this every once in a while. But they've been doing a lot this season where instead of seeing a. Previously on. It has to be, like, narrated to us through some sort of, like, Kiki moment. Although on this show, you. There is literally a Kiki moment with Kiki. But we still. It's Gretchen. Gretchen just came from the Megyn Kelly salon, and she's sitting down for some. For some lunch with. With Jen. And they are. They're gonna. They have some small talk about putting a purse on the floor. Jen was like, I was gonna put.

[Shannon Beador]

My purse on the floor, but Heather told me that's why I'm broke.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So Jen is asking Gretchen how she feels, and we sort of get, like, interspersed with, like, that to somebody.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, can we just pause on that for a moment? Jen is going to put her purse on the floor, and Heather says, that's why you're broke. I mean, what a monster.

[Tamara]

That's why you're broke, because your purse keeps getting stolen.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Who says that?

[Ronnie Caram]

That's why you're broke. You don't appreciate what you have, you leave it on the floor. God senses it and he refuses to.

[Heather Dubrow]

Send you more purses.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's why the only thing God sends you is a man in bad spray hair with, you know, clothes that he spray paints.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, pretty much. So now that we. We see like flashbacks to that, to that fight, and Jen's like, well, I'm.

[Shannon Beador]

So bummed that you're not going to Tamar's party. Does it bother you? She's like, what?

[Heather Dubrow]

No.

[Gretchen]

I'm bothered by how she tries to come in and be an about it.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So we see more flashbacks and we. One thing that we did not see last week, which I thought was so funny, this cracked me up. The Tamara stormed out of that. Out of the self defense part, like, luncheon last week.

[Gretchen]

She's like, I can't do this anymore.

[Ben Mandelaker]

But what we find out is that she came and goes, oh, by the.

[Gretchen]

Way, I forgot to tell you guys, I'm having a little party and you're not invited.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And then she storms out again and goes, wear florals.

[Gretchen]

Where your flowers. That's where everybody.

[Heather Dubrow]

Hi.

[Gretchen]

I'm calm now. I'm having a spring fling party. You're not body stupid bitch. Okay, everybody, see everybody else there we florals. I'm stirring out again. Don't forget to wear your florals.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, we're not going to change her.

[Heather Dubrow]

I think it's time to just be.

[Ronnie Caram]

Mindful of where we want to give our energy.

[Heather Dubrow]

Okay, we're just going to be mindful. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. Where's my purse? Where's my purse?

[Tamara]

Okay, let's round up all the Alfredo's. Let's ask who. Who took it?

[Ben Mandelaker]

So now Tamara's.

[Heather Dubrow]

I promised myself for 2025 I would not be blaming Alfredo for stealing anything else.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So now Tamara's setting up her spring fling party and she's like hanging wisteria from like power lines or something like that in her backyard. And then Eddie shows up with like all the charisma of a wilted wisteria. Like, I mean, actually, he is a wisteria. He's just a thing that dangles from a line that sort of gets in your hair. Like, oh, okay, thanks.

[Ronnie Caram]

Useless. The useless wisteria. I thought it was cute, though, because this show was based on Desperate Housewives. And so I like that all these years later they're doing the Wisteria lane. You know, wink and a nod. Yeah, I think it's nice. Whoever knew that real housewives would outlast Desperate Housewives?

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, Eddie, in case, in case you didn't know, he's from Orange County. He's comes in with his full on motorcycle get up. He's got like American flags all over him.

[Shannon Beador]

He's like, hey, honey.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So she's saying how she needs his help getting the, getting ready for the party, and he's gonna wash down some tables and stuff. And he's asking who's coming? And she says, you know who's coming. And he asks if Shannon's coming. And she's like, you know, I mean.

[Gretchen]

I'm fine with Shannon.

[Shannon Beador]

I wouldn't say great.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And then Tamara tells us that Shannon had texted her Teddy and offered a treatment program for cancer, which I think this is Shannon's love language. She loves giving.

[Heather Dubrow]

She can help you with your cancer.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, Shannon should, like, write a line of birthday cards that just say, happy birthday.

[Heather Dubrow]

I can help you with your cancer. I know the best people.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I had coffee in my mouth. She, she really did.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's really good at that. Remember, that was her thing with Brooks.

[Heather Dubrow]

She's like, helped you with your cancer. You didn't even have it.

[Gretchen]

You didn't even have it. I introduced you to people with Memorial.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Sloan Kettering or whatever it is.

[Shannon Beador]

Yes, I know people at Cedar Sinai.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Like, that's. But then it's also like Cedar Sinai.

[Heather Dubrow]

Megan.

[Shannon Beador]

I, I, I, I know people at the Mayo Clinic. Oh, you know what? Actually, I'll amend that. I just know people who have Mayo.

[Gretchen]

Apologies.

[Shannon Beador]

A small distinction there.

[Heather Dubrow]

I wish there was a Mayo Clinic.

[Ronnie Caram]

After everything I've been prescribed over the.

[Heather Dubrow]

Years, I have to tell you, Mayo has been the most effective.

[Shannon Beador]

Hold on one second. I'm, I'm getting a phone call. Oh, looks like they've got a slot for me at the Mayo Clinic. Yes, hello, this is Shannon Beador. Yes, I'm calling about, about. So my Mayo, I'm not sure if it's still good anymore. Can I bring it into the clinic? Okay, great. I can do tomorrow morning.

[Heather Dubrow]

Hello, Mayo Clinic. I'm having a problem with my dried tuna. I was hoping that you could, you could see us sometime today. Oh, you're prescribing Mayo. Okay, well, I would still like it to see a doctor. Thank you.

[Shannon Beador]

Hi, I am, I'm having some trouble with your online portal, and I was wondering if I could just bring my Mayo in. I'm concerned because I'm wondering if. Is there a way to make chicken salad with an alternate, like yogurt? No, you recommend Mayo. Okay.

[Heather Dubrow]

All right.

[Shannon Beador]

No, that's not exactly what I was hoping for. Is there a specialist I could speak to about that? No.

[Heather Dubrow]

Hello, Mayo Clinic. It is the end of April, and I'm not really sure what the date is. Is it May? Oh, no. Okay, wrong number.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm so sorry.

[Heather Dubrow]

Oh, God.

[Ronnie Caram]

I just broke my tooth on a piece of dried peanut.

[Heather Dubrow]

Do you know who I should call?

[Shannon Beador]

Hi, this is Shannon Beador again. Um, I'm just calling to see if Dr. Wasabi is in. I have a question. So I've been trying to find Hellman's on the west coast, but all I can find is Best Foods. Should I be concerned is Hellman's. Have they been taken off the market? Do they have poisoning? Oh, they're the same. Oh, well, thank God there's a clinic for this. Thank you so much.

[Heather Dubrow]

Hello, Mayo Clinic. I am at a sushi restaurant and everything here is overdosing in mayo. It is overdosing. Why do we need this in the California roll? Why? Why?

[Ronnie Caram]

Seriously though, why does California have to put mayo in the California roll? I hate that. I think that's one thing that Texas does better is not putting mayo in the California roll. They just put a chunk of crab. That's how it should be.

[Heather Dubrow]

I don't. Come on, man.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I don't mind the mayo in it. I really don't. In fact, I think I like it. I was never a Mayo person, and somewhere along the line over the past 20 years, I became a Mayo person.

[Ronnie Caram]

And I'm okay with it. I just. I know sushi. I just don't want it. My sushi, you know, I just don't want it there.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I think it's all about having the proper proportion. You don't want it to be, like, overly mayo, but I like a little bit of. Little lubricant in there, you know, Mayo mouth.

[Heather Dubrow]

You have been prescribed and it has been delivered. So Tamara's like, yeah, Shannon tried to.

[Gretchen]

Help me with some cancer stuff for today. So, you know, she fought over some treatment programs. And I thought, well, maybe that's her other branch. So I thanked her and so look, I'm still trying. I'm still trying so hard. Remember last week when I suggested that she's probably an alcoholic? Cuz that's an alcoholic. That was good. That was a good one.

[Ben Mandelaker]

This is classic Tamara. Framing herself as the victim to someone who's totally unreasonable and not willing to listen to her try to be like a kind, good person. And like you.

[Shannon Beador]

You.

[Ben Mandelaker]

You terrorized Shannon at her lowest moment of her life. You ridiculed her. You screamed at her. You. You accused her of being an alcoholic. And while those things may be true, you still did it at the worst time, when you're supposed to be her friend. And then she was like, well, I'm trying.

[Gretchen]

It's just like, huh. I guess I'll try and try again. I've been a good person. It's so hard.

[Ronnie Caram]

But speaking of Tamara reframing things. This is so good.

[Gretchen]

She goes, oh, my God, Eddie, my bab.

[Ronnie Caram]

And he asks her why? And she goes, yeah.

[Gretchen]

Cause that jumped off of Gina. It was just a prank. It was just a prank.

[Ronnie Caram]

No, you thought you were gonna get. You thought you were gonna get attacked, so you literally jumped behind Gina and pushed her in front of you.

[Heather Dubrow]

It's not a prank.

[Ben Mandelaker]

No, she's saying that the carjacking.

[Ronnie Caram]

Human shield.

[Ben Mandelaker]

She's saying the carjacking was a prank.

[Ronnie Caram]

Not that she said, I jumped over Gina. It was a prank.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Oh, well, then they're like. Now they're, like, mad.

[Ronnie Caram]

So I took it as, like, that's not a prank. You were using that woman as a human shield. Now, do I blame you? No. I feel like Ginas were put on this earth to use as a human shield. Like, you know, we all need a purpose. But.

[Shannon Beador]

Excuse me. This is Shannon Bedor calling. Just wondering, does the Mayo Clinic. Can it litigate any conflicts about pranks now? Okay, what was that? I'm abusing the line.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Oh, well, I.

[Shannon Beador]

Well, I, I, you know, I started this line.

[Gretchen]

Goodbye.

[Heather Dubrow]

I start lines, Megan.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Eddie's like, that's stupid.

[Gretchen]

I almost choked on my own coffee. But did I suspect anything else? Anything less than this?

[Ben Mandelaker]

Oh, please. It was fine. It was a little prank.

[Shannon Beador]

So Tamara's like, I mean, this girl cannot stop.

[Gretchen]

So Gretchen's not allowed in my house because what if she carjacks my house? She can suck a duck, but I don't even think a duck would suck her.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, that prank wasn't cool, but still. So Tamara's like. She's saying she hadn't heard about the.

[Heather Dubrow]

Sleepover, but Emily was, like, gripped and got drunk and proceeded to tell a.

[Gretchen]

Story about me that this pop singer me and Jeff were fucking. So we screamed and we yelled, and 12 years later, that's what we're still fighting about. Me fucking Hanson, by the way.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I just want to point out, in terms of not cool pranks, getting someone drunk and seeing what they're gonna do, that's not a great prank either. Just wanna. As long as we're talking about pranks.

[Ronnie Caram]

Too many years of pranks just theoretically relitigate. Honestly on this show, it's just too much.

[Gretchen]

So she's like, yeah, that was 12 years of you. She came out at one time and.

[Ben Mandelaker]

They show you coming out, like when she's screaming Gretchen. They show like 29, 2009, 2010. Some post. Someone in the post production department had a nice, nice bit of fun with Apple Motion on that one. That was really good. So.

[Gretchen]

And then I left out the best part.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, it was like one of those late night albums back in the day that they would sell and they would just like scroll all the names of the songs that were on there. There was like 500 songs.

[Heather Dubrow]

Yeah.

[Gretchen]

Well, guess what?

[Shannon Beador]

His wife, the pop singer Nelson. Nelson's wife said Jennifer followed him today. And then he's like, why would she follow him? I don't know, but I'm gonna ask her when she comes to the party tomorrow.

[Gretchen]

Cause you know what I hate?

[Shannon Beador]

People who dig up shit like me. Digging up shit about someone who digs up shit on me.

[Gretchen]

I mean, what's the purpose of following him? Yeah, everyone dresses like 90s Barbad and James a Cheetah. So maybe she thinks maybe if I follow him, he'll fuck me.

[Ben Mandelaker]

To be fair. Have you seen Eddie? You all are dressed like you're following a 90s boy band. Maybe a nine. Like a 1991 boy band.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's time for a commercial.

[Heather Dubrow]

It's time for a crappin's commercial.

[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

The destinations are amazing too. Some highlights, Aruba, St. Lucia, New York, Miami, Iceland. And a below deck favorite, the Med.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my God, the boats are beautiful. They're so modern. The rooms are just so luxurious. I love all the. The colored lighting in there, the balconies.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I also just love that they are tailored for adult experiences. That makes me so happy.

[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

Quince has the Fall staples you'll actually want to wear on repeat. Like 100% Mongolian cashmere from just 60 bucks. Classic fit denim and real leather and wool outerwear that looks sharp and holds up.

[Ben Mandelaker]

A lot of people have been asking me about my quince Mongolian cashmere and I have to say it's soft and it's delicious. And to complete the look, I actually went and I got a watch band, a titanium watch band. So that way my little watch looks a lot more chic than when I wear the exercise band that came with it. So really it's like a one stop shop for me for looking chic for fall.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, so fancy. Yes. I got a cashmere hoodie from there and I look pretty amazing in it. Layer up this fall with pieces that feel good as they look. Go to quinte.com crappens for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com crappens free shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.comcrabbins so Tamara's saying, and by the.

[Gretchen]

Way, I don't understand what's going on with Heather. I'm not very happy with her. She was into this, you know, they're calling me and make it, listening to the calls, all that stuff.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So Tamara's. Tamara's been trying to like, brew. Everyone's been trying to brew some sort of conflict between Tamara and Heather. So they're at it again now. And now we see, you know, footage of Emily and, and Heather telling, you know, Gretchen, like, oh, let's. We want to hear the. We want to hear the song. We want to hear the song. Which, by the way, I don't think is a terribly offensive thing. If someone says, Tamara sang a song, I'd be like, I need to hear it. Let's hear what Tamara says so we can.

[Ronnie Caram]

If someone came to me and said, I have a song of Ben singing and you know, Hansen, I'd be like, I want to hear it.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Listen, I would be upset if you didn't listen.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I'd be like, I want to hear it right now. Okay, I'll pay you.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, please.

[Ronnie Caram]

Of course. That's what friends do. It's called support.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Tamara's now just trying to act like, oh my God, this was such a flagrant example of disloyalty. Whatever. It's like, no, yeah, she's trying it. She wants it. To hear it.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's trying it. So she goes, she storms out but of course, is just, like, hanging out in the parking lot waiting for people to come kiss her ass. And so Heather comes out, and Tamara's.

[Gretchen]

Like, did she mistake after me? Heather did.

[Heather Dubrow]

She goes, listen to me. Me. I said, this is gross. I don't want to hear about this. I mean, I just said it blanket all night long because I was talking to Gretchen and Emily, which we could have been talking about anything, and my reaction would have been the same. But still, I stood up for you.

[Shannon Beador]

But I don't like what happened afterwards because Heather didn't even call me.

[Gretchen]

And I'm sorry.

[Heather Dubrow]

Are you.

[Gretchen]

Are you okay? Are you okay that you stormed out of the event because you heard that.

[Shannon Beador]

There was a rumor about me sleeping.

[Gretchen]

With a boy bander? She didn't even call me about that.

[Ben Mandelaker]

That. How many times did Tamara call Heather? There was a whole season. There was that season where.

[Shannon Beador]

Where.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Remember the stupid thing where Heather was actually the brunt of everything? Where Tamro said that Heather said something at BravoCon said that these. Like, everyone was dumb or something like that. And then you're like, I can't believe.

[Gretchen]

You would say that.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And Heather had to, like, Heather was, like, crying in Mexico and, like, was basically on the verge of, like, leaving. Did Tamara call Heather after that? I'd like to know.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my gosh. You're really digging back today.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Remember that?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I do. I do. But, you know, it's just like another. Another brick in the. Tamara is a hypocrite, Castle.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Wow.

[Gretchen]

She's like, yeah, I don't know what happened after because she didn't call me. Nobody got me. Nobody likes me.

[Heather Dubrow]

So why is it her fault, Tamara?

[Gretchen]

Because Heather just. She doesn't take sides. And I get it. Like, she doesn't want to argue, but I've been a friend for 15 years. You were in my wedding. Just stick out for me just one time, please.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Literally, you have this entire cast saying, heather, you are like, why do you keep defending Tamara? Are you scared of her? Like, that's the storyline for Heather this season.

[Gretchen]

She stand up for me.

[Ronnie Caram]

Everybody else is, like, stoning Heather because they're standing up. She's standing up for Tamara all the time.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Oh, sorry.

[Gretchen]

You know what I've learned? A friend to everybody is a friend to nobody.

[Tamara]

Well, you are mistaken, because I was never a friend to anybody on this cast. Okay? I'm just paying my dues before that.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Beverly Hills check comes on through.

[Tamara]

Come on, Bravo. How long does a bitch have to live in high rise in Century City before they graduate? To another franchise.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now we go to a place called Arteme Baro and Heather comes up.

[Heather Dubrow]

And she's like, I am wearing jeans. Hello, Table two for relatability. Thank you.

[Tamara]

You can't say relatable without table inside of it, right? I think if you think about it, relate table. Yes, it works.

[Heather Dubrow]

So my jeans say Ms. Dior. Never mind. You can send us to the best table. Thank you.

[Tamara]

It's my jeans say Ms. Dior because I'm about to meet Ms. B. Dor, who had a Ms. Demi Noor. Oh my God, I'm freestyling. All the Drake proximity is rubbing off.

[Heather Dubrow]

It's like an improv game, if you will.

[Tamara]

Yes and yes. And you can walk away from me now.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Thank you. Yes. And please leave.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Shannon comes and she's like, oh.

[Heather Dubrow]

I just, I feel like was looking for my glasses, but they're broken. Look, half my glasses are hanging off my face.

[Ben Mandelaker]

She might as well just walk in with a slide whistle.

[Gretchen]

Look at me, I'm wacky. I'm gonna win over America.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's missing a full on arm on her glasses and still wearing them.

[Heather Dubrow]

And Heather's like, oh, poor Shannon. Literally she can just never show up somewhere looking ready.

[Tamara]

I mean, where's her butler? I mean, come on now.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So they are going to be.

[Heather Dubrow]

She should have an Alfredo in front of her just describing what he sees.

[Tamara]

We know that if you're truly wealthy, you never have to read anything. You just get an Alfredo reader.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So Shannon, they're. They're there to do a Japanese art farm art form where they are going to be breaking pottery, then re sort of epoxying it back together. And so what they're supposed to do is they're given like mugs, I think.

[Ronnie Caram]

And they basically do this during their off season.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Isn't this called going to the plastic surgeon?

[Ronnie Caram]

So.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Special union.

[Ronnie Caram]

You're gonna look crazy.

[Ben Mandelaker]

This is like VICKI GUNVALSON Season 12 or whatever.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. These people going, going to break, break things and put them back together and not seeing the Humpty Dumpty irony is.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So they have to. Also the irony is Heather Debrow who as they showed again this episode, literally has had her. One of her somehow iconic moments is her complaining about a lady breaking a bow off of her cake. And now here she is breaking a mug. But what's funny is they're just supposed to like take do one thwack. Just to like, you know, break something off the mug and then you'll glue it back. Heather's like a boom boom.

[Tamara]

Boom, boom, boom. It's like, oh, I thought this is how we're. I thought you said treat the mug like Alfredo.

[Ronnie Caram]

Speaking of, he just runs in and starts sweeping up like, Mom. No, ma'.

[Tamara]

Am.

[Ronnie Caram]

You're supposed to put that cup back together. Give me another one.

[Heather Dubrow]

Give me another one. I've got it. This time I've got it. Let's go from the top. Swipe the scene. Swipe the scene. Okay. Yes, I have a mug. I am supposed to.

[Ronnie Caram]

He comes in the. Sweeps it up.

[Heather Dubrow]

Ma', am, wait.

[Tamara]

Ma', am, question, question. Before we break this mug, we need to set the scene. Where are we? I'm taking suggestions now.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Anyone? Anyone? Where are we?

[Heather Dubrow]

Birthday party. Thank you. Thank you. It has been a bad news day. The bad news was.

[Ronnie Caram]

Your employee just swept up another mug.

[Heather Dubrow]

My employee just swept up another mug. Thank you. Thank you. Mug.

[Tamara]

Yes.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And.

[Tamara]

Okay. And freeze.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Is this another improv game?

[Tamara]

No, I'm just. Sometimes I say that to my face. Okay.

[Heather Dubrow]

I really like the symbolism of repairing something that's broken. Sort of like repairing relationships with friends. Okay. I have a friend in town. This friend is from. Oh, thank you. Alaska. Thank you.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now Dina goes to a store, and she's returning something which I think could be the opening of every Gina scene ever, because, you know, this is, like, an everyday occurrence.

[Tamara]

Pants.

[Heather Dubrow]

I already wore this, like, story.

[Shannon Beador]

It doesn't fit, right.

[Heather Dubrow]

Yeah. You know what? I thought this one pretty, but I put it on, and I felt bad.

[Shannon Beador]

I feel bad because I want to support your stool, but it turns out I can't afford this, so I'm just gonna say it's broken.

[Ben Mandelaker]

It's like a shirt is broken.

[Shannon Beador]

Yeah, it doesn't work.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So Emily is there. Oh, I still haven't recovered from Heather's sleepover. God, so much wackiness.

[Heather Dubrow]

Can I tell or something? You know, like, how Gret and Tamara were, like, ripping each other's faces off, but, like, I was so excited that this was about, like, Hansen or what. What's the name?

[Shannon Beador]

Nelson.

[Heather Dubrow]

Nelson. Because this is your Millennial Girls moment. Look, look, I got. Look me at the Me at the Nelson concert in 2021. Lo. It's me.

[Ronnie Caram]

Trying to return today.

[Heather Dubrow]

Yeah.

[Shannon Beador]

Quiet.

[Heather Dubrow]

Emily.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Did you. Did you record a song with Gunner Nelson? So then it goes back to the pottery, and she was like, oh, by.

[Shannon Beador]

The way, did you happen to hear the song? Was it as good as anything that Brett Michaels ever sang with Poison?

[Tamara]

Heather's like, I did not hear it, mainly because I was tuning out everything those two Idiots were saying because I was doing a contractually obligated scene with them.

[Shannon Beador]

Like, oh, that's. That's too bad.

[Tamara]

But mainly, no one played the song.

[Ben Mandelaker]

That's it.

[Heather Dubrow]

Well, you were saying yesterday you could hear moaning in the background. Is that what you were saying? Well, that they said that they were recording the song and then it turned into sex. Which I totally understand, because the other day I was in my kitchen and Drake started singing a song and it turned into sexy time with me and Terry in our very special penthouse where we do sexy, sexy times like normal human beings.

[Tamara]

Yes, we had sexual times to a song called Hotline Blung.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So then that's.

[Shannon Beador]

Don't understand that.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So then she says, though, like, apparently.

[Tamara]

They were recording song and it turned into sex.

[Shannon Beador]

Well, I mean, how. How can you be singing and moaning at the same time?

[Tamara]

Well, I don't know. Maybe it would just be like. Comedian.

[Heather Dubrow]

You're too generous. Everybody sit down. Sit down. Maybe I'll just add singing and moaning to my IMDb thank you. Oh, I have to see. I'm grateful that I wasn't involved in any altercation. That is just insane to me.

[Gretchen]

Insane that people would fight.

[Heather Dubrow]

Fight women. Fighting women. It's just.

[Tamara]

Well, you know, when I went outside with Tamara, I was like, when you behave that way, when you talk that way, when you're grabbing her wrists, you lose when you do that. Not now.

[Heather Dubrow]

Jeez. Sorry.

[Ronnie Caram]

I meant to. I meant to sweep up that.

[Heather Dubrow]

That mug. Okay, okay. It's okay. Alfredo, he's got a lot of today.

[Ben Mandelaker]

By the way, I want to invite everyone.

[Tamara]

If you are trying to break your mug, feel free to shatter it on Alfredo's head. I'll go first. Okay, that was. That was good.

[Ronnie Caram]

Ma', am, another one of your employees came in and is now sweeping up the other employee.

[Heather Dubrow]

Good, good, good. You got to have some. Alfredo's on reserve.

[Tamara]

Make sure they're bold. You wouldn't want to have a chicken Alfredo. Thank you.

[Heather Dubrow]

Okay.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Thank you.

[Heather Dubrow]

Okay, that one was good. Maybe she is funny.

[Shannon Beador]

I have to admit, I thought. Hold on, let me. This is a good. That's a good reminder. Hello, this is Shannon Beador calling again for the Mayo Clinic. Now, is there Mayo in Alfredo sauce? No. Oh, that's a. That's a relief. That's a relief. Although I. So what should I do with the mayo I bought for the Alfredo sauce? Okay. The Internet, you say? Okay, I'll look. Thank you.

[Ronnie Caram]

So, back to Gina and Emily.

[Heather Dubrow]

The problem I had with is how aggressive, tamer guys that's what Skid had. Like. She doesn't like when people get aggressive, yo.

[Ronnie Caram]

She doesn't like conflict because it's a slumber party in la. We did a conflict game and there were shady questions, and one of them was like.

[Shannon Beador]

Why you doing that?

[Ronnie Caram]

Who do you trust the least? That's the question. Heather Dubro.

[Heather Dubrow]

I mean, Tamra. I mean, would you give Tamra sensitive information?

[Ronnie Caram]

No.

[Ben Mandelaker]

No, I'd give her aggressive information.

[Tamara]

No, that's not what that means, you idiot. Too bad, Anthur.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I'm going back to the future. So I said. I said, do I trust her with sensitive information? I said, fuck no, because I'm smart. I would never trust her with sensitive information. I will only back her up with everything she does and says and be her puppet. That's it.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then back to Shannon.

[Heather Dubrow]

She's like, well, Tamara told me in Temecula that I'm a grudge holder, and she's not a grudge holder. Can you believe she said that? I thought about it every moment since.

[Tamara]

Well, I think we all are, to a certain extent, wealthy, that is. Oh, I'm sorry.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I thought I was talking to my real group of friends.

[Tamara]

Oh, yes, grudge holders, probably not.

[Heather Dubrow]

Well, traumatic things happen to you. You don't forget them, do you? Is it normal to just forget? Why. Why is this. Why is this cup moving back and forth? I can't. I can't. It's your glasses. Straighten your glasses, Janet.

[Gretchen]

Oh, my God.

[Shannon Beador]

Hey. I did have a trauma earlier today when I was reaching for my orange juice from a high shelf and the mayo fell on my glasses and broke them. So it all ties together. Looks like I. I'm the one who needs to go to a clinic. Anyway, Heather, I was just saying that, you know, when there is trauma, you.

[Gretchen]

Know, you don't forget it.

[Tamara]

It's like. Yes, I know. It's funny because when I was younger, my dad used to get mad in restaurants, and that was my tr.

[Shannon Beador]

Okay, well, anyway, I just felt like there was a lot of nitpicking on the trip and your name did come.

[Tamara]

Up, but I was trying to advance my trauma storyline.

[Shannon Beador]

I'm sorry, I can't see you, so I can't really hear you right now. I'm sorry, Heather.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then we see the flashback to.

[Heather Dubrow]

Shannon telling the girls, so Heather is taking comedy classes. Oh, boop. And Gina's like, oh, I don't see Heather as a comedian. Yeah. I don't see her doing improv.

[Gretchen]

Yeah, I could see Terry doing. So that's a Funny guy. That's a funny guy. Best day. Come on. TV is botched. I love that show. You guys ever seen that lady with the bread scene playing coming out of her forehead?

[Heather Dubrow]

So good.

[Gretchen]

So good.

[Shannon Beador]

So I said, Heather, that you were doing Groundlings?

[Tamara]

No, that's just what I call the gardeners. I'm doing ucb. Totally different.

[Heather Dubrow]

So you're doing Groundlings. And they said, why is Heather doing comedy? She's not a comedian. Only comedians can do comedy. And I said, well, she was just invited to Saudi Arabia.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Heather, as most comedians do, gives Shannon the angriest, most evil look. I love every time someone challenges Heather about being funny, she returns with, like, the. The Coraline mom's face. Like, yes, there's comedy out.

[Ronnie Caram]

Dark brows up.

[Tamara]

Let me. Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something. I am a comedic actress. That was not the joke. And Alfredo, don't you dare do that again. I am a comedian.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Stop that.

[Tamara]

And I've done stand up. Stop it. I will tell you when to do that.

[Heather Dubrow]

I've also done stand up. You know, it is extremely disappointing to me that I constantly have to defend anything I've done in my life or my career.

[Ronnie Caram]

And we flashback to Alexis Bellino in.

[Heather Dubrow]

2013 saying, yeah, I've never seen one movie on Heather's. Heather's been in, like. I mean, like, Young and Hungry. What is that, a porno?

[Tamara]

Do I have to read my IMDb all over again?

[Heather Dubrow]

Well, people are just saying you're not really. That was a joke.

[Ben Mandelaker]

That was a joke.

[Heather Dubrow]

Okay, Alfredo, thank you, thank you, thank you. Well, you know, they were just saying you're not really a comedian. And I said, if I look at Heather, I think of more like a. A serious actress, you know, like Meryl Streep. Well, like that lady who, you know, follows behind Meryl Streep and makes sure that her dress is stained. Oh, a dresser. Yes, like a dresser, I suppose. How dare you? Well, you know, I'm just saying very, very big sets. You would be on very big sets. Huge sets. Just not being funny on the. I don't know. Am I offending you, Heather?

[Ronnie Caram]

There's smoke coming out of your ears.

[Tamara]

Yes, you are. Let me tell you something, America. I could be the most humorless person.

[Ben Mandelaker]

In the world, which sometimes it's hard to imagine. Theoreticals.

[Tamara]

But if I wanted to, I mean.

[Ronnie Caram]

I consider this gross.

[Tamara]

Honestly, I could be the most humorless person in the world. And if I want to take stand up comedy classes, I. Then I will buy each and every audience member and make them laugh. Okay. You should be like, that's a great idea. Support me. That's what friends do. And it's really hurtful if you're not supporting me.

[Heather Dubrow]

Not everybody thinks the same things are funny. For example, I hit Alfredo's retainer and then offered him popcorn. Terry and I got a good laugh of that. Alfredo didn't. He never found the retainer.

[Tamara]

Have you ever noticed the differences between men Alfredo's and women Alfredo's? Men Alfredo's are all like, hey, how do I enter the servants entrance? And the women Alfredo's are like, I want to just go shopping, but I can't because I have to do the dishes right now. Am I right, everyone? Oh, God.

[Ronnie Caram]

So they're still trying to put these cups together, and it's hilarious. And Heather's is just covered in glue. And so Shannon's asking her, what are the.

[Heather Dubrow]

What are all the holes for in the cup? I don't really understand this. And she's like, this is so that you let the people that aren't right in your life leave. Alfredo, put this around your neck.

[Tamara]

We make sure that all of our workers have many holes in their cups because it teaches them to do things fast. If you want to drink your water, drink it before it leaks out of your cup. That's how you do it.

[Heather Dubrow]

Now we are going to show you what people who keep using the ta ta ta at the wrong times get. Hand me one of those cups. Okay. Hand me some glue. Alfredo, why are you sweeping that up? Get back over here.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now we go over to a gen scene and we're a gold rush tattoo.

[Heather Dubrow]

Because Dawson is gonna get a tattoo.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah. I don't know why it's good.

[Ronnie Caram]

Military.

[Heather Dubrow]

I'm getting a tattoo.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's what we do.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So you just get your tattoo in the military, but that's okay. So he's gonna.

[Ronnie Caram]

I would just, like, get teardrops all over my face so that when I showed up, everybody's scared of me.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I would just tattoo a big rainbow flag on my chest and be like, guess who's here?

[Tamara]

Army.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So see how they deal?

[Gretchen]

Here comes one right now.

[Ben Mandelaker]

The WNBA playoffs are in full swing.

[Ronnie Caram]

And Tommy alters the young man in the three brings you closer to the game. Get complete WNBA playoff coverage as Tommy sits down with the game's biggest stars and delivers unmatched analysis.

[Ben Mandelaker]

The young men in the 3's WNBA playoff coverage is presented by Quest Nutrition.

[Ronnie Caram]

From irresistibly crunchy protein chips to rich chocolatey protein bars, these treats make Giving.

[Ben Mandelaker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

All the WNBA action on the young.

[Ronnie Caram]

Men and the three wherever you get your podcasts.

[Tamara]

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[Ben Mandelaker]

So he is going to get four sevens across his chest, which I don't. I don't think anyone understands why he's doing that, including him. But he's decided he's going to do it, and he's been wanting to do this since forever. We even see, like, a video at one point of him, like, as a little kid saying he wants to get sleeves.

[Shannon Beador]

So Jen's saying, Dawson's gonna get his tattoo regardless of how I feel about it.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And I'm like, everyone's gonna do anything they want regardless of how you feel about it. Jen, unfortunately, that's just sort of your lot in life, by the way.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. She's like, but I'm here.

[Heather Dubrow]

I'm here to watch him. And I'm just so thankful he's letting me be here. So why are you getting that, Dawson?

[Ronnie Caram]

Seven.

[Heather Dubrow]

Seven.

[Ronnie Caram]

Seven, seven. He's like, I don't know.

[Heather Dubrow]

Is it because it's my birthday?

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay.

[Heather Dubrow]

Because that's my birthday.

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay. That's so sweet, Dawson.

[Heather Dubrow]

Thank you so much.

[Shannon Beador]

Thank you so much. Thank you so much for. For honoring my birthday. It's so wonderful. I'm just so proud to be Dawson's mom. But everyone says, you know, your son's gonna come back different.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And she tells. This is actually really sad because she talks about how, like, it's really scary and her son wants to go into recon, and she's like, I don't want him to come back different because he's perfect the way he is. And, you know, my heart kind of broke for her with this because it's it must be absolutely nerve wracking to what, to send your. Your child off to the military, you know? So then this is making him nervous, though, because he's really nervous about getting his tattoo. And so they decide to distract him with something that won't give him anxiety at all. His mother marrying a guy who's probably gonna Conor and leave her and cause more trauma for their family.

[Shannon Beador]

So Ryan feels like a wedding ceremony is good for the kids, and I do too. But how do you feel, Dawson? How do you feel about. Or, Harrison, you're here too. How do you feel about a beach wedding with your mom in a bikini?

[Ronnie Caram]

They're like, he's great.

[Heather Dubrow]

We love him. Are you sure you really like him?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, we thought we'd hate him because.

[Heather Dubrow]

Dad told us to hate him. But, you know, like, you know, I like him. I like him.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, I love acid wash jeans.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Mom.

[Heather Dubrow]

She's like, oh, my God, you guys.

[Ronnie Caram]

We are so bonded right now. We are so bonded.

[Heather Dubrow]

Like, he treats you so well, right? Nurki treats us so well, Mom.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my God, we love him. So now he's gonna get his tattoo. And we see, like, a flashback of him being a little kid and he's sitting on a couch.

[Heather Dubrow]

He's like, I'm gonna get a tattoo.

[Gretchen]

One day of my mama and a bus. I can't wait to get a tattoo.

[Ronnie Caram]

Like, he's been really fixating on getting tattoos, like, his whole life. So. Yeah, you know, I mean, it's not. It's not a huge dream. That's kind of a sad dream. Okay. It's a bowling alley dream, but it's nice to see somebody achieving it.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah. So unfortunately for him, he hates needles, so he's super nervy and he's sweating and, like, they're calming him and everything, and they're doing the sevens and everything's going well.

[Shannon Beador]

Just like, look at this. You're almost done. You only have three more sevens and all the shading to do, and then another tattoo after that, and you're almost done. Don't you worry.

[Ben Mandelaker]

And he. He starts to feel a little not well. And then all of a sudden, he, likes. His leg starts to shake, and then he starts to pass out and they show him. It's like, it's terrifying. He is like, his face is like. Like he is fully, like, knocked out and pale. He's, like, green. But the people at the tattoo place, like, oh, yeah, this happens all the time.

[Heather Dubrow]

No big deal. Was it a little sepsis today? Deborah?

[Shannon Beador]

What?

[Heather Dubrow]

We got what we got.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I was like, was this me watching New Roni?

[Heather Dubrow]

Wow.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So they. They put stuff under here now?

[Heather Dubrow]

That happens all the time. Don't worry about it. Hey. Hey, hand me the shocker. What do you mean, the shocker? Just unplug the iron. Let's plug his finger into the socket.

[Ronnie Caram]

Just get it.

[Heather Dubrow]

Wait a minute. What are you doing? Oh, he's back. He's back. Yeah, he's fine. I told you he was fine.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's a very utilitarian tattoo. It's. There's no font, you know, there's no like seven flaming sevens or like the lucky sevens and the jackpot. Right. It wasn't that. It was just like very. It was like Helvetica sevens bold.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, it was. Yeah, it was. It was a choice. And I'm. When he finally decides what the meaning is, I'm sure it will be very meaningful for him someday. So he. He survives. And as Jen says, good luck in the Marines. So then now we go to Emily. She's sweeping her floor, which is a very Emily thing. She's like, oh, my God.

[Gretchen]

I swear to God that all the dog hero is equivalent.

[Tamara]

It's right here.

[Heather Dubrow]

Why don't I get you one of.

[Ronnie Caram]

Those little robot vacuum things? Shane? Okay. You can get me a Roomba. It can't be for my birthday or Christmas.

[Heather Dubrow]

Okay.

[Ronnie Caram]

It can't be a gift.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Can I put a turkey sandwich on.

[Gretchen]

The Roomba and have it bring it.

[Ben Mandelaker]

To me from the kitchen?

[Ronnie Caram]

Don't forget, when you proposed to me, you tried to put a Dyson on my finger.

[Tamara]

I won't forget.

[Ben Mandelaker]

So they get pizza and there's no. There's no plain pizza for Luke because I guess they're gonna try to like, encourage him to eat with that, like the pepperoni and stuff, but he just has rice. And Emily is saying basically he's. He's on the up and up. The boys are seeing therapists. And essentially Luke is diagnosed with a learning disability as well as other things. And so. And Shane has been diagnosed with being an. So he has. So they're basically like, shane, be nicer to your child. Because Shane, I think, was trying to do like a sink or swim sort of thing. He, like, I think was. He was trying to not coddle. He's trying, but he overcompensated. So now he's being more supportive. And I guess they're seeing some improvement from Luke.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, so he had a learning disability and stuff. And she's saying, you know, she's questioning her own parenting because aren't they? These things she should have noticed, like, where were the red flags? Did I bring him? Too late. He's highly intelligent in certain areas, but he's in the fourth grade, and I didn't know he could read. That's crazy.

[Ben Mandelaker]

But she's very up on the podcasters that Katie's been talking to. So, you know, we put our focus.

[Ronnie Caram]

Not even mom shaming. I'm just like, I wouldn't. I. You know what?

[Heather Dubrow]

I think I'm.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think I'm read shaming, like, in general. Like, I don't know. I used to be forced to read.

[Heather Dubrow]

I would hate it.

[Ronnie Caram]

And I wasn't even forced to read the best things in the world because my mom likes to reading, like Danielle Steele or Mary Higgins Clark, you know, either kind of romance thrillers or just thriller thrillers. Murder. So I've read, like, so many murder things. I read a lot of Dean Koontz. I was like, in the third grade, I was like, wow, Carrie Gary is amazing. She's my. She's. I think my first gay icon was Carrie because I was first. I was forced to read so young. So I guess that's where my shot comes in.

[Heather Dubrow]

I'm like, get your kids off the roadblocks and onto some book box blocks. How about that?

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, like, I mean, obviously, like my. My old Cooter kind of like, instead of be like, yeah, that. But I'm like, you know what? Honestly, I don't know. I don't know. Like, I don't know what it's like to be a mom when it comes.

[Ronnie Caram]

To the parenting stuff. It's like, what the do we know? I don't know.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I don't know.

[Ronnie Caram]

Like, I think it's probably doesn't mean.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Well, I wonder if. If she's overstating it or whatever. I think. I think it's like. I think weird things like that can happen. I mean, Gina was just saying. I mean, I never get to go to Gina, but, like, she was saying she wasn't aware that one of her kids was having an issue. Like, I think it's. I think it's hard. I think it's hard. And, you know, I don't know. I. I could only.

[Ronnie Caram]

It does like, anyone in this.

[Ben Mandelaker]

My tank for.

[Tamara]

For.

[Ben Mandelaker]

For weighing in on Emily's parenting is, like, running dry at this point.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, it's not even. It's not even.

[Heather Dubrow]

I'm.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm really not even criticizing her parenting. I'm just. I guess I'm questioning. Questioning how you could get to the Point where you don't know your kid doesn't. Like, doesn't the school tell you? Like, isn't there someone who's like, that's what surprised me, how to read. You know, I'm actually more so.

[Ben Mandelaker]

I'm not. I'm actually not. I don't. I'm not surprised with Emily. I'm more surprised that the school did not flag it personally. The school did not flag that there was.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I guess I'm just saying, like, how does that happen? Because it. Listen, it takes. It takes a village to teach a child not to read all the time.

[Ben Mandelaker]

It's really scary. It's really, really scary. Kids fall through the. The cracks. I mean, you know, that's, that's.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's just.

[Shannon Beador]

And how.

[Ben Mandelaker]

That's how we wound up with. That's how we end up with Ryan.

[Ronnie Caram]

Ryan fell into the crack, so.

[Ben Mandelaker]

But he found a cowboy.

[Ronnie Caram]

He dove into the crack. So they're talking about, you know, dealing with the kid and stuff. And he said that. He said that the kid told him a couple weeks ago, hey, daddy, do you know what ADHD stands for?

[Heather Dubrow]

Attention deficit.

[Ronnie Caram]

Hey, a dog.

[Tamara]

That gets a bigger laugh than anything. I do.

[Heather Dubrow]

Come on, now that's a comedian.

[Ronnie Caram]

Heather's just out there in the bushes like, crushing cups. Crushing cups.

[Ben Mandelaker]

She's taking notes.

[Tamara]

Okay, wait, let me look at the structure of that. Adhd, attention deficits.

[Shannon Beador]

He.

[Tamara]

Hey, there's a dog. Here's the thing, though. There's no T in the adhd, so this joke shouldn't even work.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now Tamara setting up for a party. She's wearing a flowery dress and she looks kind of crazy dressed like that because it's Tamara. You know, I feel like Tamara should always be dressed in like a skin tight red leather thing with like devil horns.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah, I just feel like florals. This is just not the cast for florals. This is the cast for, like, cutouts and leopard print, you know, but not florals.

[Ronnie Caram]

So big plastic rings holding the fabric together around the breastplate.

[Gretchen]

You know what? In the spirit of spring, let's just.

[Shannon Beador]

Spring forward in a new beginning. A new beginning for everyone except for Gretchen and Katie.

[Gretchen]

So I thought it'd be fun to.

[Shannon Beador]

Have a spring fling, as in fling some mud at each other.

[Ronnie Caram]

So we see Lisa the gluten free cake artist show up at the door.

[Gretchen]

Oh, hey. Maybe it's just there being me, but I'm getting so soft. Look at me just making cakes two ways. I'm not gonna be both this time.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then we See, a flashback of.

[Heather Dubrow]

Heather being like, that woman came into my home, took the bow off of my cake and ate it. You have defiled my cake.

[Ronnie Caram]

I remember that girl.

[Heather Dubrow]

She's like, oh, he's talking about, I.

[Gretchen]

Ain'T do nothing with the kicks. I ate some of it.

[Ben Mandelaker]

They built, like, a whole season off of that, so that was one of.

[Ronnie Caram]

The funniest seasons of all time. That was a classic.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah. So then there's Gretchen. There is a cake for Gretchen, but Gretchen will not be attending. Instead, Gretchen is doing some crazy photo shoot in, like, a park somewhere with Slade and her daughter. And they're all dressed up. It's like an Easter photo shoot. And. But what I. I kind of get the feeling with Gretchen Slade is that they do Easter photo shoots every month of the year. It's like, well, it's August 13th.

[Gretchen]

Time for our Easter photo shoot.

[Ronnie Caram]

So. See this one? That she's even holding a bunny. You know, this poor bunny.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Is just looking like, God, just kill me already. Like, just turn me into mittens already. Get me out of here. So Shannon calls and check.

[Heather Dubrow]

Well, I just wanted to check and see if you're okay, because what happened was just. Is this another Easter shoot? Is it even Easter? Do you remember when you did an Easter shoot for Christmas? You made that Santa Claus cry. Remember when you told Santa Claus he would never replace Jesus? Wow.

[Shannon Beador]

So I just want you to know, agratchin, that if you're wondering what I recently did find out is that mayo is shelf stable, but once you open it, you really should refrigerate it.

[Gretchen]

Learned that the hard way, but thank.

[Shannon Beador]

God there's a hotline for that. So just calling to pass on the news. Pay it forward, you know what I'm saying?

[Gretchen]

That's so sweet of you to call me. Thank you for that. What are you doing?

[Heather Dubrow]

Oh, you're on your way to Tamara's, aren't you?

[Gretchen]

Yeah, let's be honest.

[Heather Dubrow]

I'd rather poke my eyes out with.

[Gretchen]

Forks and go to Tamara's spring fling party.

[Heather Dubrow]

I mean, there's so many things I'd rather be doing. Like. Like watching my feet. I don't know.

[Shannon Beador]

Oh, well, Gretchen. Gretchen Rossi, who I have no relationship with. But I'm calling because you hate Tamara. You know, she and I are good now, but, you know, if I were you, I would have a conversation with her about that, because it's not okay what she did. It is. It is not okay. Okay. Are you mad yet? Do you want to get mad at Tamara again?

[Heather Dubrow]

I heard Gretchen Apologize. I heard it. But that's the difference because Tamara gets any little bit of information and she just runs off and tries to hurt someone. Oh, she can't take it. She can't take it.

[Ronnie Caram]

I love that sham is even getting herself so worked up in her diary room.

[Gretchen]

Well, let me tell you, I'm enjoying this much, much more than where you're headed. Sorry. Slade just told the money rabbit that he invented Real Housewives.

[Heather Dubrow]

Congratulations. You've reached the end of part one of a two part recap for part two. Go look for the recap that says part two.

[Ronnie Caram]

See you over there, suckers.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. It's always a party on Alison Block.

[Ronnie Caram]

Our way is the Amber way.

[Ben Mandelaker]

It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.

[Ronnie Caram]

Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella Etchells. We never miss her call.

[Ben Mandelaker]

It's diane Call Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no Tricholas Hava Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no less.

[Ronnie Caram]

Namey she's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

[Ben Mandelaker]

She's our favorite streamer.

[Ronnie Caram]

Caroline Peacock, Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with lacy B K Sarah, Sarah whatever will be will Lauren Sills be she gets an A from us it's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry we love her on the rocks it's Melissa Cox. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the burg.

[Ben Mandelaker]

This is living with Michelle Vivian, I.

[Ronnie Caram]

Love a YA Olivia Williamson. Tastier than Flanderson. It's Rachel Manderson.

[Ben Mandelaker]

She sure is swell.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's Raquel, yes we can. It's Savannah.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.

[Ronnie Caram]

Darn Skippy, it's Tippy. And our super premium sponsors, she's VVIP It's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD.

[Ronnie Caram]

We'Re taking the gold with Brenda Silva.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Let's get real with Caitlyn o'.

[Shannon Beador]

Neal.

[Ronnie Caram]

Put us on a stretcher It's Charlotte Fletcher don't get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Sides who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland let's go into the.

[Ronnie Caram]

Woods with Guy Tubbs it's our queen It's Queen Laifa Nobody holds a candle.

[Ben Mandelaker]

To Jamie Kendall Hail the cork master the master of the cork Jennifer Corcoran we got our wish It's Jen Plish she's not harsh, she's Jilous Hirsch My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod Shadley in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock G It's Lisa H We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthy always killing it.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's Lola Al Kalani the incredible edible Matthew Sisters she eases our woes it's Melissa St. Rose there's a chance of meatballs It's Rebecca's cloud Neat.

[Ben Mandelaker]

It's Ronit Feldman Maximum love for Sandy Maximoska she's the queen bee It's Sarah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Lemke we cannot tell a lie It's.

[Ben Mandelaker]

Sarah tell of son Shannon out of a can and Anthony please don't stop it's solely and pop let's take off with Tamla Plain she ain't no shrinking.

[Ronnie Caram]

Violet Cootar we love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.