#3063 Below Deck Med S10E06 Part 1: Vegan for Vendetta

Summary

Watch What Crappens – Episode #3063 Recap

Below Deck Med S10E06 Part 1: Vegan for Vendetta
Date: November 4, 2025
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam

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Episode Overview

In this lively installment, Ben and Ronnie bring their signature mix of sharp satire, Bravo devotion, and comedic riffs to recap Below Deck Mediterranean Season 10, Episode 6, “Vegan for Vendetta.” The episode dives deep into yacht chaos, focusing on an unruly vegan guest, weather-induced disaster, and the crew’s attempts to maintain their sanity amid guest complaints, shifting winds, and messy romances. The guys also branch out, throwing in tangents about Sandra Bullock, Juggalo culture, and the existential crisis of pharmaceutical jingles.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Vegan Guest Drama: Carlos vs. Josh

• Tempest on Board (07:59–09:49):
  • Chef Josh loses his temper over Carlos’ constant vegan complaints. Ronnie remarks, “We all knew he was crazy when he was like, ‘Oh, I meditate and I was at an ashram and I love using human feces to grow vegetables.’ I was like, you’re a serial killer.” (08:25)
• Hypocrisy & Louie Vuitton Bags:
  • Ben notes the irony: “Someone pointed out in the comments that he’s carrying a leather Louis Vuitton bag, which is really hilarious… with this vegan.” (10:34)
• Chef Josh’s “Rottweiler” Rage:
  • Josh confesses to violent outbursts in previous kitchens, telling stories about grabbing a chef by the neck. Ben: “You are a monster. And you’re sitting here telling this, like, with a laugh on your face… why are you acting like you’re in the trenches of Afghanistan right now?” (13:17–13:48)
• Carlos as the Perennial Complainer:
  • Ben on Carlos’ sightseeing gripes: “Are you saying you came to Barcelona and were hoping to see like the stadium from 1992?... I mean, this guy’s a total idiot. He’s an imbecile, nouveau riche idiot…” (15:20–16:06)
  • Ronnie: “He’s really trying to be fancy and he just looks so tacky.” (16:52)

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2. Yacht Crew Antics & Growth Arcs

• V’s Transition to Deck Crew (23:07–25:51):
  • Ben: “She’s good. She’s doing a good job at rope roping, rope things. Etc.” (23:48)
  • Crew cheers V on for her performance on deck. Ronnie: “She looks more natural doing deck work than stew work. What are we gonna do? Set her free into the world.” (25:09)
• Max’s Role Diminishes:
  • “Max is already like an afterthought. Like, no one cares about Max anymore. His storyline for the season is done.” (24:18)

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3. Flirtations and Boatmances

• Kizzy and Joe’s Fling:
  • Ben: “Joe’s like, ‘I think I’ve got a stronger relationship with my underwear than Kizzy’s had with her boyfriend.’” (21:09)
  • Ronnie: “There’s no crime in just wanting to somebody on a boat. Just go him and stop acting like you’re in the middle of some rom com, Kizzy.” (20:52)
• Joe’s Player Reputation:
  • Joe admits, “I do honestly believe that I’m… a good guy, but… I just always end up in mad situations.” (49:05)
  • Ronnie: “Whatever store is open, he’s going to walk into. He just wants to shop, you know?” (50:09)

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4. Weather Chaos: When Wind Attacks

• Stormy Scheduling and Yacht Mayhem (36:06–42:50):
  • Wind suddenly picks up, chaos ensues, toys and tenders are nearly lost.
  • Comic riff: “Wow, this guy. It’s getting so windy here that we have to call her Victoria, not V. Calm waters are for V. But stormy weather, that’s Victoria.” (36:44)
  • They go on a Sandra Bullock/movie tangent about storms and “forces of nature.” (37:10–38:06)
  • Ben: “The NBCU synergy with Wicked is really out of control. They’re like, ‘Let’s have an activation on Blow Deck Med. Can we get a tornado on Blow Deck Med?’” (39:16)

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5. Random Tangents & Cultural Commentary

• Pharmaceutical Jingles Existentialism (30:13–31:34):
  • Ben and Ronnie spiral into a philosophical breakdown of Skyrizi’s evolving jingles (“Nothing is everything” vs. “Control is everything”), with Ben declaring, “I love someone being flustered and irascible and going to the Internet, being like, I’ve had enough. Is it nothing is everything, or is it control is everything?” (30:38)
• Reddit & Internet Humor:
  • Discussion of a Reddit thread about Skyrizi price: “For us, it’s $80,000 a year.” Ronnie: “Cheese and crackers.” (31:34–31:49)

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6. Guests, Service, & Vegan Cuisine

• Breakfast & Carlos’s Dietary Demands (28:39–32:39):
  • Carlos continues to complain despite getting fresh, beautiful food.
  • Ronnie: “He’s acting like they’ve served him nothing but fruit roll ups and Snickers bars, sir.” (28:39)
• The Real Story Behind the Complaints:
  • Ben: “This is someone who became a vegan because it was trendy… trying to be like a vegan influencer somewhere.” (28:46)
  • Ronnie: “It’s a straight up control thing…” (29:08)
• Resolution at Breakfast:
  • Ben observes, “Carlos… is actually so hungry at this point that he just doesn’t have it in him to complain anymore. He just has melon, and he’s gonna be happy.” (32:39)

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7. Themes for Dinner & Random Bravo Knowledge

• High Tea Confusion:
  • Kizzy is asked to decorate for a “high tea” themed dinner. Ben questions, “Why are you having high tea as your theme for dinner? That doesn’t make any sense at all.” (45:07)
  • Later, Ben clarifies the difference between high tea (a working-class dinner) and afternoon tea (the posh event). (51:44–52:26)
• Crew’s Plan to Lift Spirits:
  • Asia proposes a dance routine to cheer up the guests: “Very standard with high tea, is that you do high tea and have a dance routine afterwards.” (48:21)
• Bravo Easter Eggs:
  • Ben recounts a missed Potomac moment: “Wendy is, like, looking at a statue, and she’s like… it’s infinity and beyond, right? And Stacy puts her hand on Wendy’s arm and goes, ‘No, that’s Buzz Lightyear.’” (33:53)

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Memorable Quotes with Timestamps

• Ronnie (about Josh’s persona):
  “He’s a clown that travels with clown makeup to do chef work. I mean, that’s an insane person. Never trust him.” (08:25)
• Ben (mocking Carlos):
  “This guy’s a total idiot. He’s an imbecile, nouveau riche idiot who… probably putting the bill for him, and he’s acting like he… is at the main table at King’s Landing or whatever.” (16:06)
• Ronnie (dissecting food complaints):
  “He’s acting like they’ve served him nothing but fruit roll ups and Snickers bars, sir.” (28:39)
• Ben (on Skyrizi’s jingle evolution):
  “I love someone being flustered and irascible and going to the Internet, being like, I’ve had enough. Is it Nothing is Everything, or is it Control is Everything?” (30:38)
• Ronnie (weathery chaos):
  “It’s mayhem out there. Everyone’s dying. There are people dying. The vegan flies away into a tornado. He’s gone. Then it brings him back. We don’t want him.” (38:55)
• Ben (Potomac/Buzz Lightyear anecdote):
  “Stacy puts her hand on Wendy’s arm and goes, ‘No, that’s Buzz Lightyear.’ I rewound that three times.” (33:53)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Vegan Guest Meltdown: 07:59–13:48
• Deckhand V's Triumph: 23:07–25:51
• Kizzy/Joe Flirtation: 20:52–21:27, 49:05–50:52
• Wind-induced Toy Mayhem: 36:06–44:51
• Skyrizi Jingle Tangent: 30:13–31:49
• High Tea/Theme Confusion: 45:07–46:41, 51:44–52:36

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Final Notes

Ben and Ronnie maintain their sharp wit and playful camaraderie throughout, filling the recap with pop culture references, self-deprecating humor, and astute observations about Bravo’s editing, yacht life, and human nature. This episode is a treat both for Bravo superfans and anyone who loves a fast-moving, joke-packed podcast that makes reality TV even funnier.

For Part 2, listeners are reminded to check their podcast feed for the continuation of this breakdown.

Transcript

[Ronnie Caram]

Welcome aboard Virgin Voyages, where luxury meets drama. Free sailing. As you know, the Real Housewives of Miami took a trip on beautiful Virgin Voyages cruise this season.

[Ben Mandelker]

But we thought, why did the Miami girls get to have all the fun? So we're putting the C in SLC and seeing what it'd be like if our favorites from Utah went on the same boat.

[Ronnie Caram]

Today we're joining Lisa and Angie from the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City as they indulge in one of our world class restaurants. With Virgin Voyages, you'll experience the same delicious food and good times that these housewives are about to enjoy.

[Ben Mandelker]

Remember, the cruises are all included, so there's no need to worry about hidden fees or surprise charges. Now let's see what Lisa and Angie are up to.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh my God. This restaurant is amazing. I absolutely love the food here. May I take your order? Yeah, I'll have some.

[Ben Mandelker]

So how could you order soup? That is so rude of you. At least be Greek. Soup.

[Ronnie Caram]

No, I said so.

[Ben Mandelker]

Soup? Are you talking about soup, man? I don't even know any soup, man. Why are you bringing soup into this?

[Ronnie Caram]

I said so.

[Ben Mandelker]

Why are you being like this? I thought we settled everything, Lisa. I just want to have a lovely appetizer in this delicious restaurant.

[Ronnie Caram]

I am so sick of being accused.

[Ben Mandelker]

Of things I was trying to do is honest. So a lot here. Lisa, I brought back all the soup bowls you gave me. Since we are obviously not friends anymore, they're in a crate for you to take home.

[Ronnie Caram]

What a meal. Virgin Voyages offers top notch dining experiences with menus curated by Michelin starred chefs. While we can't guarantee your friends will be as entertaining as Lisa and Angie, we can promise you'll have an unforgettable time.

[Ben Mandelker]

From the Caribbean to the Mediterranean, Virgin Voyages takes you to amazing destinations in style. Make your next vacation truly fabulous with Virgin Voyages.

[Ronnie Caram]

Learn more@virgin voyages.com or contact your travel advisor today. Audible's Romance collection has something to satisfy every side of you.

[Ben Mandelker]

When it comes to what romance you're into, you can't be pinned down. Unless you want to be. Here's your invitation to have it all.

[Ronnie Caram]

Fancy a dalliance with a duke? Or perhaps a sexy billionaire? Find a book boyfriend in the city and another on the hockey field. Or if nothing on this earth satisfies, you can always find love in another realm.

[Ben Mandelker]

Hear modern rom coms from authors like Lily Chu and Ali Hazelwood, the latest romantasy series from Sarah J. Maas and Rebecca Yarros, and Regency favorites like Bridgerton and Outlander plus all the really steamy stuff.

[Ronnie Caram]

Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30 day trial at audible.com crappins that's audible.com crappins.

[Ben Mandelker]

Watch what crappins. Watch what happens. Who cares what happens when there's so much that crapping? Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens? Hello and welcome to Watch what Happens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the irascible and hilarious Ronnie Caram. Hi, Ronnie, how's it going?

[Ronnie Caram]

The harassable.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, irascible.

[Ronnie Caram]

What's that?

[Ben Mandelker]

It's like irascible. It's like you're. Describe it. Like irascible is like you're.

[Ronnie Caram]

Are you looking it up? I saw your computer flash.

[Ben Mandelker]

I am. Look, I am looking it up now because now I'm afraid put on the spot that I'm give the wrong definition. Having or showing a tendency to be easily angered. But it's like usually like used. But it's like usually in a funny context, like ah, okay.

[Ronnie Caram]

You know, okay, I see where irascible.

[Ben Mandelker]

Is like usually a fun.

[Ronnie Caram]

You made it sound so lovely. Then you're like, okay, let me look up the definition.

[Ben Mandelker]

Better than harass.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's what it means. This angry. This angry gay Ronnie Carom, everybody.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, you know, like they usually will say it for certain things correct. Like the irascible, like George Carlin.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm kicking a true adjective out of bed. I love a true adjective. Well, hi everybody. Hi, Ben. How you doing today? We're both kind of in earth. Tony, flesh colored tones. Are you in gray or like a cream? I can't.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm in gray. But what you can't see is I'm also in a.

[Ronnie Caram]

Some of the best tik tok fights happen in a Wawa babe. That's correct. No Wawa fight.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, we're gonna go from the Wawa to the Med Med because it's below deck Med day. Before we get into that. Thanks to everyone who came to crappy hour last night. It was a real fun one as usual. So thanks to everyone who tuned in. We do that every other week. So join us. And then we alternate that with Amazon Live which will be coming up next week. Always doing something live on Mondays. We're also really excited. Yeah. Next week is Bravocon and we're going and we're gonna have a meetup. So come meet up with us.

[Ronnie Caram]

Do we have a location sure don't. Do we have an idea? Sure don't. If anyone has a location in Vegas on the Strip you want to give us for a meetup, we're in. Let's do it.

[Ben Mandelker]

We've been trying, we've been trying to set something up. And we have, we do have, like, we have a team that is trying to get stuff going, but guess what? It's not easy.

[Ronnie Caram]

So we might just be meeting outside of a hotel and being like, hey, party in the.

[Ben Mandelker]

Party in the Grand Lux Hotel, Grand Lux Cafe, everyone. Who knows where it's going to be. It's a typical event for sure. Yeah. Like, tentatively, we are aiming for Saturday at 10 o', clock, but that may. That's subject to change. It may go to Friday, but right now we're aiming for Saturday at 10. So mark your BravoCon calendars.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, we'll announce it on Instagram or something. So just check our socials. Welcome to the show, everybody. Oh, also Sunday night, guess what? They're switching it up on Bravo. They are going to have Potomac, but they are also going to show the last episode of Wife Swap. So it's going to be a little bit different schedule this coming week. So everybody be prepared. Don't miss Wife Swap. It's the Wendy episode.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's so funny because, you know, you know, Wife Swap premieres and the Wendy's news breaks, they have to push the premiere because, you know, the idea, the, the sensibility is like, oh, well, it's sort of in poor taste to air this Wendy episode which was supposed to be the premiere. It's a little bit in poor taste to just exploit this situation. She just got arrested. It's like, wow, Bravo is going to be a little respectful. Hey, guess what? Now we're gonna put it right after Potomac. So everyone who watches Potomac and see Wendy's Devil, I'm like, like they're totally exploiting it. Totally getting as much Wendy mileage as they can by putting it right after Potomac.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, yeah, I mean, they should have done it the first week. Now it's not the time to get moralistic. Bravo. You haven't done it yet. Why start now? Okay, get out of here. Show it to me when I need it. I needed in my veins that week.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, look at. Well, tonight will be the one that I think we're all looking forward to the most. I mean, everyone who's having a viewing party to see the Emily Simpson Wife Swap. Okay, raise your hand. Raise your hand if you invited the neighborhood to gather round to watch Emily Simpson Because I know that's gonna be exciting for everyone.

[Ronnie Caram]

I watched it already.

[Ben Mandelker]

Was it good?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. The pig is the star. There's a pig in this one, and it's the star. And Emily's like, what? The pig always eating my purse. Because you carry sandwiches in there. Why do you think it's one of those?

[Ben Mandelker]

Very interesting. The pig's leaking stories to social media about it. It's talking bad. It's putting my family in a bad position. The pig is talking to people about my children.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, it was pretty good. Okay. But today, guess what we're here for. Below deck Mediterranean. Right? Below deck. Med. Big day. Huge day. People get really upset because they don't have enough minerals on their plates.

[Ben Mandelker]

Mineral. So Josh has just. He's just stormed off the boat, which is funny because this episode is called the Tempest. Talk about a tempest in a teapot. More like a tempest on a boat. That. Then the tempest goes off the boat for a little bit, then comes back, and it's just a gentle cloud. So that's what Josh is doing. He's throwing off. He's throwing up because he's steaming mad about the vegan situation.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, he's super mad about it. We all knew he was crazy when he was like, oh, I meditate, and I was at an ashram, and I love using human feces to grow vegetables. I was like, you're a serial killer. And he's a clown. And he's a clown that travels with clown makeup to do chef work. I mean, that's an insane person. Never trust him. And a thin mustache. He's got, like a Simpsons. You know, the guy on the Simpsons with a mustache? It's like a Simpsons. Not snurdly or whatever his name is, but the. It's like one who looks like he's been to prison a lot, and he just has that real thin, barely filled in mustache. Never trust those people.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. He really should. He should just join a posse. A posse of insane clowns. What would they call that? I don't know. God, you set it up. You said insane. You said he was like an insane clown. I was like, how did you not add the third third word there?

[Ronnie Caram]

Because their music isn't harmonious to my lifestyle. The insane clown.

[Ben Mandelker]

But they think about that.

[Ronnie Caram]

I don't want to hear a bunch of.

[Ben Mandelker]

You'Re offending the Juggalo community.

[Ronnie Caram]

I want to hear that. Whatever happened to Stormy weather? You know what I mean?

[Ben Mandelker]

Whatever happened to Stormy Daniels?

[Ronnie Caram]

I think she won her case. Didn't she. She got a lot of money and then got that lawyer thrown in jail. So she won a lot of money, and then the lawyers stole a lot of money from her, and then he went to jail. Isn't that what happened Stormy Daniels? I don't know.

[Ben Mandelker]

But quite frankly, I'm shocked that Bravo hasn't had her as a blow deck guest yet, because she seems really like the type.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my God. Do you know who that would make really jealous is Captain Sandy's wife. She's my baby. Sorry, I gotta go. I'm watching my favorite show, Stormy. Wait a minute. I thought your favorite show was Wind Baby. So, okay, so he storms off the boat. The guests are actually at the table sticking up for Josh. They're like, oh, shut up about your minerals.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay?

[Ronnie Caram]

He's doing a good job. And that guy's like, there is literally nothing healthy in front of me. And then we cut to see what's in front of him, and it's all cooked vegetables and glorious healthy stuff. This guy's just an. And someone pointed out in the comments that he's carrying a leather Louis Vuitton bag, which is really hilarious, too, with this vegan.

[Ben Mandelker]

Amazing.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, that's.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's truly amazing. This guy's an idiot. Which, by the way, I'm just gonna do this really quickly one more time. As long as we're talking about idiots. In case people haven't heard the crappy hour episode, the biggest idiot is actually me. Because I was the one who thought I'd found a smoking gun. With Stacy's contract yesterday and the Potomac recap, I was like, look, it was signed 5, 5, 24. The season already aired. The season had legitimately not even aired yet. It didn't air until the fall. It had just started filming. The date was not a smoking gun at all. And I did a victory lap, acting like I was Sherlock fucking Holmes. I was a fucking idiot.

[Ronnie Caram]

You want me to add to it? First of all, I was there with you. I'll take the blame for that, too. We're dummies. But then the second thing was, then they were talking about a stripper, because Wendy was saying the only time she's been attracted to a woman was this bad stripper in. In D.C. with braces. But we read it. We were like, oh, she was a bad stripper. Why would you be attracted to a bad stripper? I know that that means good, right? One of the comments was like, do you think. Do you think Michael Jackson was really singing I'm bad, I'm bad? Like, it was a confession. Like, I'm bad. I'm bad. You know, it.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm bad. I interpreted the bad the correct way, but I just thought, like, it. I thought, like, it was more that she was still a janky stripper because she had br. But I understood the bad part. But I still was like, with you. Because I was like, what? Like, wow, this random ass, like, janky stripper with the braces.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, I should have. But sometimes then when you're going over your notes later, you don't remember. You don't remember.

[Ben Mandelker]

This is like, with the apple socks. Well, I'll never forget the apple socks incident where we Talked for, like, 10 minutes about Ramona getting apple socks, and we're like, what is that? Is that some sort of, like, new device? And, like, we did a whole bit, and then I think. I think it was that. Just, like, a brand of socks. I don't even remember at this point.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, okay, so Josh is upset. Okay, so the guest. One of the guests is like, you know what? Maybe Josh doesn't understand what you're trying to say because he's really good. And then this guy's just all pouting, like, well, no one's standing up for me. So Josh is really frustrated, obviously, and he's just, you know, around the corner of the boat being like, fuck off, fuck off. So he tells. We find out a little bit about this psycho. He's like, yeah, back in Michelin star restaurants, I used to have the breaking point. I had the nickname. Nickname. It was the Rottweiler. The Rottweiler in the kitchen. Because when I snapped, I snapped. And I remember, like, grabbing a chef by his neck and, like, putting his head into a recipe pack. But, you know, it's the old Josh. New Josh goes to ashrams and loves human shit on vegetables. So I'm the. No, you're not. You're still an old psycho. And didn't he tell a story? Wasn't he the one who told a story of a chef that he was working with, like, shoving his face into an iron or something?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he thought last week he was like, yeah, last. Last week he was like, I remember one time getting my face shoved in, and then now he's proudly declaring how he shoved someone's face into a recipe pack, whatever that is. So I'm like, you. You are a monster. And you're sitting here telling this, like, with, like, a. Like a laugh on your face, like, isn't this crazy? That what we do? I'm like, no, you're a Lunatic. That's totally unacceptable behavior. You're cooking food. Why are you acting like you're in the trenches of like Afghanistan right now?

[Ronnie Caram]

You were asked to make a saute.

[Ben Mandelker]

Your green beans and move on with your life.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, yeah, fucking bake a. Bake a. Fucking like roast a red bell pepper, you know what I mean?

[Ben Mandelker]

Which I did last night, by the way. And I did not have to slam anyone's face into any sort of thing on the counter.

[Ronnie Caram]

Crazy. And he's like, I'm not going to let Carlos affect me. He's needing the primary. Okay, okay, I'm back, I'm back, I'm back. He just honks his nose and so he goes back and Joe is now eating all the leftovers in the kitchen. He's just walking around eating every. The second the chef leaves, these people walk into the kitchen and just start eating off the counter.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, they're like birds. Birds at like, like, like in an outdoor restaurant, the moment you step waiters, birds are on your. They're on your plate, pecking away. Terrible.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So he asked Josh, he gives Josh a hug and he's like, his mouth is all full. He's like, want to finger up your asshole. And then. I'll never forget that about Joe. I don't know why that's the only thing I remember about Joe is talking about how he wanted somebody to finger his butt. So then we cut to the guests. They're talking about their excursion. They had a great time and they're like, it was awesome. What a great excursion. And guess who's mad vegan. Carlos. Carlos, who can't be happy about one goddamn thing.

[Ben Mandelker]

The plus one, he goes, you know, they dropped us off in an undesirable neighborhood, but they, you know, they hosted an Olympics here. So I know there's something amazing here. They're just not showing it to us.

[Ronnie Caram]

Did.

[Ben Mandelker]

Are you saying you came to Barcelona and we're hoping to see like the stadium from 1992. Like a 30 year old stadium where you have like buildings that are like hundreds of years old, like art, nouveau, Gaudi, all this beautiful stuff. And he's like, ew, gross. Show me the, show me the, the swimming pool. The Olympic swimming pool. I want to see a diving board. I mean, this guy's a total idiot. He's an imbecile, nouveau riche idiot who. I'm not even sure if he's nouveau reach. I think he's just nouveau. And then I think he just was like brought along and I think this, the sweet lady who is like, the primary is probably putting the bill for him, and he's acting like he, you know, is at the main table at King's Landing or whatever.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, yeah, that was real fancy.

[Ben Mandelker]

Shut the up.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, this guy's a little. And also, can I just tell you, the Olympics are not held in the nicest neighborhoods anyway, so I don't know what you're talking about. Olympics are also, like, where can we trash, you know, what's a part of town we can just Absolutely. Just trash? You know, let's put it in, you know, the end of Queens or whatever. Like, for.

[Ben Mandelker]

But like. Like the US End of Queens.

[Ronnie Caram]

Isn't that where they had it in New York?

[Ben Mandelker]

But also, we saw the excursion, and they literally were in the most scenic, beautiful section. There's, like, walking around adorable streets. And he's like, ew, gross. I'm like, you were where?

[Ronnie Caram]

Where are you?

[Ben Mandelker]

Like, what are you talking about?

[Ronnie Caram]

Is there a neighborhood where the buildings aren't so old? Oh, he's tacky. I'm actually embarrassed for Carlos because he's really trying to be fancy and he just looks so tacky, you know? And they're. Even the other guests are making fun of him now. They're like, you're ridiculous. Like, no signing it.

[Ben Mandelker]

And in fact, I actually think that they. These people are probably much nicer and more giving than they are being presented. But because he's such a productions, like, let's lead with that. That these are all, like, angry, like, picky people. And then Carlos is kind of like the. The most of that, you know, because then, you know, in the end, they actually wind up being, like, lovely. And they have, like, a very empress.

[Ronnie Caram]

Of all time, probably of all time.

[Ben Mandelker]

So I kind of think that they were, like, more generous than they were presented, but that the story was that Carlos was being obnoxious. And, like, you can't have the story of them being generous and Carlos being obnoxious. Like, it's more fun.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, he's the one that seems like the. I mean, they did have the couple la last time who went and ordered. You know, they're like, what kind of food do we want? How about pizza, pasta, fish, elephant? Like, they named 30 things, but they weren't mean. Like, they seemed pretty nice. The only one who's an asshole is Carlos. And we all know that person who is in our circle or our family who every time you go somewhere, they are just the asshole to the waiter. They're rude about everything, and everyone else has to just sit there because if you're like, stop being rude, then you look like you're not being on the team of your family member or whatever. And I think that that's what everybody is victim to in this. Like, victim to Carlos. Carlos's attitude, where it's like, okay, well, let's just be polite and let Carlos do his thing. It doesn't mean we're assholes. But, you know, when you're around an asshole and you let them be an asshole, you're kind of an asshole too. That's just how it is.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's how it is. Whoa. Get your apple socks.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

[Ben Mandelker]

Cold mornings, holiday plans. This is when I just want my wardrobe to be simple. Stuff that looks sharp, feels good, and things I'll actually wear. For me, that's quint. And the bonus quince pieces make great gifts too.

[Ronnie Caram]

I got a cashmere hoodie in like an oatmeal color. And it's finally time that I get to wear this thing. I'm wearing it all the time and I look adorable and dashing. I love them for the wardrobe pieces like this. You know, when it's like cold, you get a nice sweater, a nice pair of pants. I mean, Quint is great for that.

[Ben Mandelker]

And I got a titanium watch band for my smartwatch that looks very chic. So this season's lineup is simple but smart and Easy with Quint's $50 Mongolian cashmere sweaters that feel like an everyday luxury and wool coats that are equal parts stylish and durable.

[Ronnie Caram]

Their denim nails the fit and everyday comfort all at a fraction of what you'd expect to pay.

[Ben Mandelker]

Give and get. Timeless holiday staples that last this season with quints go to quints.com/crappens. Free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com crappin free shipping and 365 day returns.

[Ronnie Caram]

Quints.com crappin so now we're just like more.

[Ben Mandelker]

More eating, etc, and Asia and V are talking about the schedule. And you know, V is gonna be on breakfast, but you know, V's gonna be doing. Is still doing double duty and everything. And we cut to a guest and she everyone's just basically like, I'm going to bed. Everyone's depressed by the meal. Or at least Carlos took it out of them. So they all go to bed.

[Ronnie Caram]

They can't enjoy everything because Carlos is There. So they're like, bye.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah. He's, like, ruining everything. And then Joe and Kizzy are being flirty while they, like, help, like, clearing the table and stuff. And Joe's like, oh, Kizzy is like the next level of flirt. And she's like, the way that I act and the stuff that I say, I just should not have a boyfriend. I don't annoy with the lies you tell each other. It's to yourself. It's just like, that's enough already.

[Ronnie Caram]

There's no crime in just wanting to somebody on a boat. Just go him and stop acting like you're in the middle of some rom com. Kizzy, Like, Jesus, you've dated the guy two months, okay? It's not. You're not in a real relationship. It's been two months. Whoever you want, be quiet.

[Ben Mandelker]

Mm. And then Joe's like, I think I've got a stronger relationship with my underwear than kisses had with her boyfriend. It's like, okay, all right. I don't know if you have a good relationship with your underwear since it seems like you're always fucking people. So I think it's always coming off. Oh, wow.

[Ronnie Caram]

He's entered that part of manhood where you start losing your hair and you're just getting everything you can, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Right before it goes, you know? And as a man who's lost his hair, I get it, you know, you're like, oh, my God, what's gonna happen? I'm gonna lose my hair. My. My penis is never gonna work. What's gonna. No one's ever gonna me again. And then you lose your hair, and then you find people who have, like, Daddy Warbuck's fetishes, and then, you know, they're out there too. It's okay. But he doesn't have another bald person there telling him that. So he's just grabbing onto whatever lifeboats he sees, you know? And every time he gets a boner, one little more follicle falls out and just drifts across the camera like the feather in the forest gump. It's just drifting away. So Kizzy, of course, guys, calls Tommy. Tommy, Tommy, can you hear me? So she calls Tommy. And he's like, hello? But he won't be home for 45 minutes, so she's gonna have to wait. Guys cannot wait to see what happens.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, we ain't be able to wait. Well, it's the next morning. We'll never know how that 45 minutes went, because now we skip all the way to 6am Josh is in the kitchen. And he's muttering to himself, carlos. Because he knows that Carlos is gonna make his life hell again today. And Asia is talking to like, so, what are you gonna make this morning? He's like, well, I'm gonna throw around.

[Ronnie Caram]

Throw.

[Ben Mandelker]

Throw a lot of things around for Carlos. Just hitting preferences and things like that. And then Captain Sandy is looking outside, and she goes, you know what? Let me tell you something, America. Let me give you what I see right now. It looks calm out there, quiet as can be. Sort of like Norma's dating cue. Just you could hear a pin drop. So I think we got to get off the dock. This is our only chance to give these clients the experience that they paid for.

[Ronnie Caram]

Gosh, guys, I look out there, it's just so calm. The water is like Norma's dms. There's no one in them. Time to get out there and have a good time. So we see the credits rolling on her favorite show, Wind. On the screen. She's like, ah, wind is dying down. That was a great season. All right, let's get to it. So Nathan is bossing people around, and then V has to pull some lines, and he's like, oh, my God. I really don't want to disappoint Nathan with this first time talking, but it's like my first shot of a trial on the deck team. And there's like, no room for up. Put my trauma to the side, guys. I'm gonna throw a rope.

[Ben Mandelker]

Guess what, guys? She throws the rope and is. She's. She's good. She's doing a good job at rope roping, rope things. Etc. So Joe's like, you did a good job. And she's like, I'm part of the deck team now. We did it, Joe. We did it. Nathan's like, she's done absolutely fantastic. So then Max is like, oh, the Queen Victoria just arrived. He's already like. He's already like an afterthought. Like, no one cares about Max anymore. His storyline for the season is done. Now he's sad.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. And Joe's like, well, what she's doing right now, if she carries on throughout the season with us, she's going to be the best I can, anyone could ever ask for. So then we go to Aisha outside, and she's cheering for her. Everyone's like, oh, my God, yes, me. You're doing it. And Sandy is looking. Looking at her through a pair of binoculars. She's like, oh, my God. Let me tell you what. I see some pores, both figuratively and Literally. Okay, well, didn't need these binoculars after all. She's not that far away.

[Ben Mandelker]

Whoa. Hey. I didn't realize that Bravo changed the schedule of not just Wife Swap, but Wind. Apparently, there's a whole other episode starting up right now. Oh, my God. I clear my afternoon. A new episode of Wind is starting up.

[Ronnie Caram]

Would they split the season into. What is this, Stranger Things?

[Ben Mandelker]

Is it super size? Oh, my God out there, guys.

[Ronnie Caram]

Bumpy. So it's just like, oh, she looks more natural doing deck work than stew work. What are we gonna do? Set her free into the world.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Max is talking about talking to V about the pros and cons of being outside versus inside. He's like, yeah, you know, outside is so nice because it's, like, adventure out here, you know, the unknown. It could be a dolphin coming here or a boat or, you know, it could be so many things. But you are, like, in the galley, and you're just, like, in the pantry. You don't know what's going to happen. You, like, if you're on pantry, you don't even see jellyfish going by that you can pet. You know, you miss all the fun.

[Ronnie Caram]

You don't even see the eye patches for free. In the ocean, they call them jellyfish. So then V is like, yeah, I love being outside because, like, outside's, like, amazing. Like, I love outside, but it traumatizes me. He's like, oh. So then Asia is calling Nathan, and she only needs V during breakfast and dinner, but he can have her the rest of the time. And she's saying, you know, it's good to test voice, and she's gonna do great with just Kizzy. She's like, famous last words. Am I right?

[Ben Mandelker]

So everyone. The crew's doing crew stuff. People are getting into their different uniforms. Josh is pulling a quiche out of the oven. Kizzy is ironing. The guests are still in bed. And finally, people are waking up, and. And then Nathan asks if he wants to watch some anchor stuff. And she's like, fuck, yeah, I want to watch some anchor stuff come out to the deck to not watch the anchors. Am I right? Am I right? Hey, is this a new show? Because I'm ready to watch some anchors.

[Ronnie Caram]

Guys, let's get some toys in the water. Okay, so now let's see. You know, just everyone's working, ironing, you know, Ladonna is going on a Jet Ski. I've never seen someone enjoy a Jet Ski as much as Ladonna did. That was pretty cute.

[Ben Mandelker]

She did enjoy it. She had a Great time, Ladonna. I feel like Ladonna's like, great. And she's just buried under all the awful Carlos coverage in this scene.

[Ronnie Caram]

The jet Skis, like, puttering along, it's going like, really so much, like just screaming. So funny.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Vy does a knot, and it's very exciting. She does a knot and. And Joe doesn't even know how to do the knot. So it's like, whoa. Vy knows a knot. And Vy's like, I'm so good at tying knots because when Bon was my instructor and teaching me everything we he knew about boats, this man was like. He was like cutthroat. He was like a veteran. He was deployed to Afghanistan and he was not playing around. And she basically talks about how she learned knots from her ex. So, yeah, she can do knots really well, guys.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So she's like, yeah, I can tie a knot in an ice storm with my eyes closed.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

And I can, like, tie a bowline in an ice storm with my eyes closed.

[Ben Mandelker]

Sounds useful next time you're sailing a yacht in a dust storm. So people finally wake up and go on to get ready for breakfast. They. They. She's telling. Asia's telling people them about, like, what breakfast is, etc. And then Carlos is like, yeah, I'm ready for that. Not eating. Not eating. Nothing fake. Just putting straight freshness in my body. That's what I want. And she's like, okay, they've served you.

[Ronnie Caram]

Nothing but fresh food. What are you talking about? He's acting like they've served him nothing but fruit roll ups and Snickers bars, sir.

[Ben Mandelker]

This is a. This is someone who became a vegan because it was trendy. This is someone who definitely saw it on Tick Tock. And it's like, I want to have, like, nothing fake in my body. I don't think this is someone who. Who became a vegan for any ethical reason or for any dietary reason. I think this is someone who did it purely to be trendy and now is, like, really upset that they're like. That they're trying to be like a vegan influencer somewhere.

[Ronnie Caram]

And I think it's a straight up control thing. It's people who don't have control in their lives and they feel like, powerless, and so they come up with. And it's not just veganism, it's anything. It's any kind of extreme dietary thing that they can put other people through shit. Because obviously there are vegans who do it for the right reasons and there are people who are really Gluten free. Like, they have to be gluten free because of celiac and stuff like that. And then there are people who are just like, they want to be that person at the restaurant who's like, was this prepared on a different counter than everything else? Because I need my own counter for this to be. And you're never going to convince me.

[Ben Mandelker]

That those people don't exist.

[Ronnie Caram]

And he's one of them. You know, he's just like, oh, it's not good enough. I'm the only person here who's important enough for minerals, and I'm gonna make a stink about it wherever the fuck I go.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know what a wise person once said? I love control. And that wise person is the new Sky Rizzy jingle. That's what we were doing. That's not a crap.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, about last night.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. He's basically a new Skyrizy jingle, which, by the way, will never be as good as the original one. Let's be honest.

[Ronnie Caram]

And you know what? I would like to. If I was serving Carlos breakfast, I would say, carlos, I have one piece of sage advice for you. And he'd be like, sage, that's not fresh. And I'd be like, it actually is. It's a plant.

[Ben Mandelker]

Don't smudge me.

[Ronnie Caram]

What I'll say to you is, nothing is everything. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, okay. Nothing is everything.

[Ronnie Caram]

Enjoy your sage. Enjoy your sage cashew cheese.

[Ben Mandelker]

There's a Reddit thread, and the Reddit thread says, skyrizi controls know everything. That's the headline. And then it says, first the song was nothing is everything. Now it's control is everything. So which is it? I love someone. I love someone. Being flustered and irascible and going to the Internet, being like, I've had enough. Is it Nothing is everything, whereas it controls everything. What am I supposed to do when I see the commercial?

[Ronnie Caram]

You know what that is, though? It's a good point. That's a good point. And it's a good question. What the fuck are you trying to do, Skyrizi? Make up your mind. They're like, we don't have to. We have Crohn's. We can say whatever we want. What are you gonna do? What are you gonna do, Attack a person with Crohn's? Yes. Your songs don't make sense. You can't tell me in one second nothing is everything. And they'd be like, oh, control is everything. And also, are you, like, an abuser? Like, I'm not gonna be in a relationship with Sky Rizzi. They don't sound healthy. They don't sound like a healthy person.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, there's a big discussion because it's like someone says, I thought Skyrizi was for plaque psoriasis. Now it's for Crohn's. And someone else is like, maybe it's a two for one thing. And then someone says, I thought nothing was everything. It's a zen coon grasshopper. And then someone goes, for us, it's $80,000 a year.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my gosh. Cheese and crackers.

[Ben Mandelker]

Wow.

[Ronnie Caram]

Crazy.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Skyrizy's Reddit is a real interesting thing.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, you never know where the Internet's going to take you.

[Ben Mandelker]

My chair needs some Skyrizi.

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay, so now we go to the kitchen. There's a lot of food ready to go out, and Josh is like, oh, my God, I'm absolutely getting cracked in the ass. And now it's time for everybody to get up and go to breakfast. So we get soft apricots, guacamole, lobster quiche, beaten mango salad with pomegranate and homemade hash browns. They love the quiche. And then someone's like, so, vegans, how are you liking your breakfast? Which. And then a good question to ask.

[Ben Mandelker]

Carlos, I know he likes the melon, and he seems to be, like, pretty chill. I think he's actually so hungry at this point that he just doesn't have it in him to complain anymore. He just has melon, and he's gonna be happy.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think someone probably told him, stop being an asshole. You're not even paying for this shopping. Rudolph.

[Ben Mandelker]

Maybe that's what it was, too. I hope that's what happened, because I.

[Ronnie Caram]

Think he's so Today.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he's a little bit better. So the. The toys. Oh, my God. Just after they put all the toys out, now they're all getting blown around because no one knew that this episode of Wind was happening. They changed the schedule, and all the toys were out. We got all our toys out for a whole different. We got. We were all ready for the. For an episode of Toys. It turns out it's an episode of Wind Happening. And now it's a real. It's real clusterfuck on the schedule.

[Ronnie Caram]

Speaking of toys, I went to Disneyland, and I went on something that had some of the toys characters. Buzz Lightyear has got to have bad knees. That's it. That's all I got. I was like, God, that guy does not look healthy. He's like, well, I'm a big action storm. Like, your body is gigantic, and you have these tiny little leg You've got, like, tiny little Sutton legs. He's gotta have terrible knees. I feel bad for him. And he looks like possibly he's got hemorrhoids as well. Even animatronic. He doesn't look healthy. I'm just pointing it out. Like, someone help.

[Ben Mandelker]

Buzz, I'm so glad you brought this up, because it occurred to me that my favorite part of Sunday's Potomac episode we didn't even mention in our recap, and I'm only remembering it right now, which is that when the women were at the Alexander Hamilton house, Wendy is, like, looking at a statue, and she's like. She's like, oh, yeah. Well, this is a. Yeah, this is a one thing. It's because something said infinity. She was. Yeah, well, you know, it's infinity and beyond, right? And Stacy puts her hand on Wendy's arm and goes, no, that's Buzz Lightyear. That's Buzz Lightyear. I rewound that three times. And I cannot believe we forgot to mention that on the recap. It was so just the way that Stacy sort of, like, kindly just put her hand on Wendy's shoulder. Like, she was like a. Like, Wendy was some, like, old baddie lady who had lost her mind. Like, no, no, no, that's not from American history. That's just a quote.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, you're an academic.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's Buzz Lightyear commercials. Here comes one right now.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Kizzy goes to V, and she's like, wow, guess what? I taught Joe how to do a knot. Yeah, I can do, like, a bow line in my sleep. I learned it from Bo. Yeah, I learned it from him. He was in Afghanistan before the drama. But, yeah, he was really good, you know, in that Afghanistan war, tying knots. He was so good. He got a Purple Heart for that.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah, they. He did. He was actually a paratrooper. And whenever he would arrive into base from a plane, from the sky, they'd be like, oh, God, look, there's knots up there. Oh. What? Hey, everyone, get out of the way. Not slanding. Knots landing. Knots landing. Thank you. Thank you.

[Ronnie Caram]

Somewhere the Insane Clown Posse laughed at that one.

[Ben Mandelker]

Now the Insane Clown Posse joke seems much better, huh? Much better. You just have to do a horse joke later.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my God. It's sweet. Sweet. Wind just went up to 17 knots. Holy moly guacamole.

[Ben Mandelker]

Wow.

[Ronnie Caram]

Where did that wind come from? Jesus.

[Ben Mandelker]

Guacamole. Is that vegan guacamole? Is that vegan guacamole? Oh, it's an expression, Carlos. Sorry. It's my scene. Now.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, guys, guys, we got to get all the toys in. Okay, I'm gonna need Victoria. Get Victoria in here. She knows not. She learned him in Afghanistan. And then she's like, all right, no problem kissing it out there, lady. Yeah, yeah. I just. We need to get that slide up before it rips. God. You know what? Some of these days I really regret putting out all the toys for no reason at every moment of the day. Jesus.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. All right, well, this guy. It's getting so windy here that we have to call her Victoria, not V. Okay, calm. What? Calm waters are for V. But stormy weather. That's Victoria. Get Victoria out here right now. No, they start doing this, and it's like 28.

[Ronnie Caram]

Holy crap. That's like a rom com horror movie with Sandra Bullock.

[Ben Mandelker]

Later. Well, she does have that. Wait, she does have that. What was the name of that movie she did with Ben Affleck that. That had a weather name in it. It was like storm when it storms. I don't know.

[Ronnie Caram]

Bird Brain was my favorite. What was that one called?

[Ben Mandelker]

Bird Box.

[Ronnie Caram]

Bird Box. I love bird Box.

[Ben Mandelker]

Forces of Nature. Forces of Nature was Ben Affleck and Sandra. Sandra Bullock. So she is kind of like, here with us right now because there's a force of nature, and it's pulling the tender away. Oh, no. The line to the tender just snapped. Wow. I probably should get mad at someone for tying a bad line on that tender, but doesn't work with the overall storyline, so we'll ignore that part.

[Ronnie Caram]

God, Sandra Bullock is always with us. She's not even dead yet, and she's still always in my heart. Think of her every day. She's like, what's under Bullocks doing right now?

[Ben Mandelker]

She's with us when we're awake. And she's with us while you were sleeping.

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay, all right. Eyebrows. Peter Gallagher. That's the only thing I can think of with that movie is his eyebrows. Okay, so things are blowing. It's windy. White caps. Get the toys in. It's so dangerous. It's so dangerous. God, I love that banana. Until it comes time to win. That banana could be a missile to someone's head. Don't let the banana kill the Donna.

[Ben Mandelker]

Hey, is a painting crew coming here to fix this boat? Because all I see are white caps. Get the toys in here right now. Come on.

[Ronnie Caram]

What is this, the casting department for below deck? Because all I can see around here are white caps.

[Ben Mandelker]

What? What is this, Carl Radke's new teeth? Because all I can see are white caps.

[Ronnie Caram]

Now a Rope is snapping. And, you know, it's. It's mad. It's mayhem out there. Everyone's dying. There are people dying. The vegan flies away into a tornado. He's gone. Then it brings him back. We don't want him. We've never sucked somebody into this tornado that complained about there not being enough minerals taken back. And it's fake Louis Vuitton too.

[Ben Mandelker]

The NBCU synergy with Wicked is really out of control. They're like, okay, here's what we're gonna do. Let's have an activation on Blow Deck Med. Can we get a tornado on Blow Deck Med? I think that'd be really great. And then Cynthia Riva can come out of the tornado, and she could sing on the boat and then go back in and she could take a vegan with her.

[Ronnie Caram]

Maybe.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't know. What do you guys.

[Ronnie Caram]

I've got an idea. Let's drop a boat on Hannah.

[Ben Mandelker]

Something has changed within me. It's the new. It's the new schedule for wind, actually.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's what's changed.

[Ronnie Caram]

So it's mayhem out there. Everybody's dying. People are jumping overboard. Kathy Bates is just driving by in a little life boat. Like, I wish I could save them all, but I can't.

[Ben Mandelker]

Helen. Helen Hunt is. She's on a little speedboat. She's throwing Pepsi cans into the tornado. Ow. Hey, had this Pepsi can. Get on the teak.

[Ronnie Caram]

Bill Pullman comes by. It's like, I think I'm in this movie. I honestly can't even remember anymore, honestly.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, no, you're in. While you were sleeping. We need the ghost of Bill Paxton for the twister reference. Thank you.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now, let's see. People are running for ropes, and Max is on the radio. He's like, I've got to. I've got to jump. I've got to jump. I must risk my life for this boat. Take. Take it easy. Don't hurt yourselves. Okay? That's 27 knots of wind. Dun, dun, dun.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, they. They're like, oh, my God. The tender is floating away. The tender is. Oh, my God. It's made it to Morocco. It's so far away. But then, like, Max just jumps on it from, like, the deck. It's, like, right there. It's like, oh, it didn't really float that far away. Floated like a foot. I mean, I think Christian went farther than the boat than the tender did.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So the guests are kind of laughing because it's. It is funny, I think, when you're inside and you Just watch like poor people flying around almost dying to get a blow up boat, you know? So he's like, oh, the clips on the lineup broke. And one of the guests is like, yep, you know what, you guys, you should have seen that. The guy saved it. He saved it. And Captain Sandy's like, well, that's Maxo. That's what he does. He's a saver of things.

[Ben Mandelker]

God, yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Love that banana.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he's great. He's the Mediterranean. The Mediterranean is very unpredictable. Sometimes you order hummus and then you get olives instead. You never know what you're going to get at the Mediterranean.

[Ronnie Caram]

All right, we're going to head back. It can be dangerous out here, so they are going to head back. And then the guest is asking Vy if she's okay. She's like, yeah, it's a little rough, but I was born for this. I'm on the exterior.

[Ben Mandelker]

So I guess as the water's gonna win. And then another guest goes, no, she's winning. That was impressive. And someone else goes, yeah, she's winning now. And then someone else is like, who are we talking about? I don't know, but she's winning.

[Ronnie Caram]

The girl throwing a rope down as an anchor. The girl throwing the iron down as an anchor. The cast, she's doing great. So now everybody's back on the boat. Everything's fine. And Captain's like, debt crew, debt crew, crisis averted. We're gonna head back. Good job, guys. That was not easy to be out there. Probably. You know what? It was easy watching it. It was easy watching it. God, that filled me with joy. That was a good one. Anybody love Sandra Bullock? I'm thinking about her right now. I don't know why. Hope she's okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay, you guys ever think that maybe. Maybe Sandra Bullock will be Dorothy in the week in the wicked sequel? God, that would work so well. Let's. Let's write a letter. Let's get a campaign going. I like that idea. You guys like that idea? No. Okay.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now let's see. So Aisha is talking to Kizzy about how V is on deck now. So laundry's fucked, so Kizzy has to do it. She's like, so now it's time for them to do stuff. The guests go to their rooms, and one of the guests is really annoyed, I guess, because they can't. They just can't do anything on this charter, you know? They can't.

[Ben Mandelker]

I think some of them may be a little seasick too. And so they're just like, in Their rooms being sad.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. Which is fair, I think. I think so.

[Ben Mandelker]

Like, I think, like, I would be totally happy being in my room on the yacht. I'd be on my laptop. I'd be on a bed. I'd be like, running a sub stack. I'd be like, this is great. I'm like, that's my happy place.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. But, you know, 50, 000 a day or whatever the hell they pay is not great. So now Nathan's like, all right, crazy. You're ready to keep it going because you've been doing so well. So I'm gonna have you throw this line over there. And you can do it, Kizzy. Everybody believes in you. You just won the Purple Heart. Oh, God. We're filming this. Captain Sandy, you got the binoculars on? All right, let's film this. Let's get it ready. Ready for posterity. Go, go, go. V, throw that line. And then she kind of misses the line.

[Ben Mandelker]

Throw the line onto that Barcelona 1992 Olympic statue. You can do it. She does. She does it, but she does it badly, so she's, like, so embarrassed, but whatever. She's like, really good. And Nathan's really happy about it. And he's like. He's like, I'll take V any day. We're working part time over. Christian and Tessa working full time. Remember those two ding Dongs? And we see a clip of them being totally inept, trying to pull something out of the water. So V is basically like, whose decision is it if I stay? Can I stay? Can I stay in the exterior? I love the exterior. So Nathan's gonna talk to the captain about it, but now it's time for V to go get into her blacks because it's time for dinner service. So she's going to get into blacks. And Captain Sandy's watching, and she's like, wow, Victoria, I'm impressed. Yeah, I'm still gonna use the full word. She's just so good.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then the theme for tonight's dinner is high tea. And Kizzy is going to direct. Direct this. You know, like, do all the decorations and stuff. And she's like, so do you want it like Alice in Wonderlandy? That's my it. That's crazy. Not that's.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's crazy tea. And on top of. And. And you're. Kizzy, you're British. Also, like, did. And I didn't pick up any sort of Alice in Wonderland theme from any of the guests. Like, they just were. Also, by the way, why are you having high tea as your theme for dinner? That doesn't make any sense at all. Why don't you just have high tea? You literally can just have high tea.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, I don't know. It's kind of weird. So then Joe and V eat together, and it's flirting time, everybody. So he's like, do you like the restaurant? It's got good ambience, hasn't it? Yeah. We should light a candle and be romantic. I really like the way that you're. The edges of your teeth touch every time you smile. He's like, you do. That's just the romance taken over dinner.

[Ben Mandelker]

Nathan walks by, is like, oh, look, romance is blooming. He's like, no, it's just a date. She was talking over dinner, and Nathan's like, I know. It's just a date. Just a date. So then Asia's talking about dinner plans, and Josh is going to make three proteins, three salads, mushrooms, fries, and bread. So I don't know. I don't know if there's gonna be enough minerals and healthy content in there for Carlos, but fingers crossed.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, look, just to go on Carlos's side for a second, because I'm a bitch like that. The guy said he doesn't want salads, so you're making three salads. And also, you tried serving him mushrooms last time, and he said that wasn't vegetable enough for him. So you're serving him mushrooms again and fries and bread, which aren't going to be considered healthy. So I don't know if he's going to get away with this. Also, isn't this supposed to be high tea?

[Ben Mandelker]

That's why I said, what sort of theme is high tea for dinner? And also, shouldn't it be afternoon tea? Because I learned that afternoon tea is the posh one. High tea is where, like, the workers just stop and have tea at a high table. Didn't we learned that last year in Britain somewhere? Like, you actually want. If you want to be posh, you want to say afternoon tea. So this is all mess girl.

[Ronnie Caram]

I wasn't paying attention. Here's what I. I thought of when we were having tea in Britain. This is so expensive. Tea is $20. Are you kidding me?

[Ben Mandelker]

But it came with tiny finger sandwiches. Ronnie. Hello. But I will say, okay, I think that you make a good point about the. The salads and mushrooms, but I'm gonna go the other way, which is that I think salad is a broad thing. I don't think a salad necessarily means it's a big lettuce, leafy salad. It could just be, like, like, garbanzo beans with, like, roasted cauliflower and all sorts of interesting stuff. So I don't know, but I am surprised that he went for mushrooms again. But that is kind of vegan. Doesn't like mushrooms. I feel like mushrooms are just, like. First of all, I love mushrooms, but I feel like if you're a vegan, you kind of have to then, like, adopt mushrooms into your life. I'm sorry. Like, you just have to, right?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's like, there's such a big part of it.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, I mean, you don't have to. Not everybody likes them. I love them. You know, they're very meaty. You can make them just taste so good. But you know what? I can't feed the man. So Asia's worried about the charter. She's like, I don't. I can just tell they're not happy at all. Like, they're just hiding in their rooms right now. And so we see the guests, who I guess don't know. Their mics are on. Chandra's like, are you feeling sorry for me? And he's like, no, I'm feeling sorry for. We. Okay, this sucks for everybody.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Aisha's like, we have to do something to make them forget how terribly this has gone so far. So Asia mentions to Kizzy that the guests want to have a group dance on the sky deck led by the yacht crew. So they're gonna come up with a dance routine, which is, like, very standard with high tea, is that you do high tea and have a dance routine afterwards. So they're gonna do that to. To lift the moods of everyone.

[Ronnie Caram]

So now Nathan and Joe, they're talking about V. Like, who's V into? Nathan's like, she's into you. And he's like, I mean, I'm fond of both of them, aren't I? Yeah, but you'll tackle both of them, won't you? And he's like, no, no, honestly, I. I just don't. I don't want to do that. That's disgusting. And I'm a good man now. I'm a good man. Pick one. Gonna pick one?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. No. Yeah. He's changed. Totally changed. Joe's not gonna. Not gonna do the whole thing. Joe says, honestly. He says, well, I know that the crew thinks I'm a little bit of a player. I do honestly believe that I'm. I'm a good guy, but I just. I just always end up in mad situations, you know, I've unintentionally hurt people in the past, and so I'VE chose, so I've got to choose, but I don't know what I'm gonna do just yet. Like, okay, this. This little preamble is nice. This does not mean you're not a boy. This is just the thing that you're saying to try to make us think you're not a boy, but you're just a boy, and you're gonna do the whole thing all over again, and you're going to burden everyone with inane conversations about, like, so which one do I choose? I like them both. And in fact, he does it right now. He's like, honestly, V is a lovely girl. You know, Which I think when he says, v is a lovely girl means that she's in second place to Kizzy, right? Because he. His first place would always be like, oh, I just want to. I just want to do something nasty, Terra. But V is a lovely girl means that I think that he thinks as V as second place.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. I don't. I can't really tell with him. I think he's still like, which one is actually going to give me something and which one is just flirting with. With me. I think he'll just. I think he's just willing to go, really, wherever. Whatever store is open, he's going to walk into. He just wants to shop, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So Nathan tells him that V's. V's fella died last year. Oh, her fella died? Yeah, last year, her fella died. That's so sad. I understand. I'm just gonna see how it goes. It's me. It's me. First charter. So he is. I guess he's like, oh, I can't like. Like, play with this girl's heart because she's probably still mourning. And that makes my job as a boy much harder to do. So how do I. How do I go forward with this?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So Max had a good day, but we're still not paying much attention to Max. And then Carlos is complaining that he doesn't get to go in the water because he's never gone on this type of yacht and not been able to go on the water. So change the weather. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

No.

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay. And then Josh is just cooking, cooking, cooking. Kizzy wants Joe to help her with Spanish dancing. And she's like, oh, my God, it's so simple. And then he basically just stands there, and she twists all over him, throws her legs up, and then does the splits, and he's like, okay, all right there. Growing up in Spain, I learned dancing from old women because they'd Always pick me out and they'd go, you're dancing with me. Kind of the same way. It's happening today. I've unintentionally hurt so many old women, but not anymore. I only one old woman at a time on the damn floor.

[Ben Mandelker]

I just love like this 8 year old boy and some like 73 year old lady's like, you kid, get over here, I'm gonna show you some moves. So now he and Kizzy are working on a routine and I'm just gonna say I want to do a correction real quickly or a clarification about afternoon tea and high tea, which is that high tea, I was correct. Afternoon tea is the posh one. But high tea is an early evening meal. It's a working class meal eaten after a day's work. So it high tea as a, as a dinner theme could actually work. But you're basically having a like a working class meal of meat, cheese, fish, bread, potatoes and vegetables. So I don't think that's exactly what they want.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, that's what they're getting though. High tea. He's making salads, potatoes and whatever. The other thing he said was red, so he's doing it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Hey everyone, this is the end of part one of this recap for part two. Keep an eye on your podcast feed. It is coming up in just a moment. Thanks so much for listening. Catch you on the second half. Watch what crap INS would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King it's always a party on Allison Block.

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Sides who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland let's go into the.

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[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

Doll with Tessa V she ain't no shrinking violet Col Kutar we love you guys. If you like watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.