Podcast Summary: Watch What Crappens #3122 – Vanderpump Rules S12E3 Part 1: Venus Try Trap
Podcast: Watch What Crappens
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Episode: #3122 – Vanderpump Rules S12E3 Part 1: Venus Try Trap
Date: December 18, 2025
Overview
In this episode, Ben and Ronnie dive headfirst into the third episode of Vanderpump Rules Season 12, relishing the “lazy Susan of awfulness” among the new SUR staffers. The hosts playfully analyze shifting alliances, classic restaurant drama, and the emerging icons and villains of the new cast, reveling in the mix of pettiness, toxic relationships, and low-stakes scandals that epitomize the show. This recap is filled with sharp banter, in-character impressions, and strong opinions, making it both a loving roast and a pointed critique of all things Vanderpump.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Reboot's Energy & Nostalgia
- Both hosts express surprise and approval at how quickly they’ve become invested in the new cast’s dramas—even after just three episodes.
- Ben: "I'm actually already teetering towards love. I was so entertained by this stupid episode." (02:19)
- They praise the show’s return to restaurant-centric storylines that made classic VPR, noting real scenes of work at SUR and believable staff dynamics.
- Ronnie: "They're showing a lot of the restaurant stuff, which I really like... I really love seeing the pettiness in the restaurant and how everybody's turning against, like, one person at a time." (05:32)
2. Cast Introductions & First Impressions
- Venus: Celebrated and mocked as the delusional “queen bee of SUR”, complete with childhood memoirs and unshakable self-confidence.
- Ronnie (quoting Venus): "I've always known I was a star. I started writing memoirs in the fourth grade." (04:21)
- The hosts flag Venus’ delusion as a quintessential VPR hallmark.
- Kim & Marcus: The “toxic couple” whose on-again-off-again drama ensnares the rest of the cast.
- Ben: "They're toxic and awful... a couple that drags everyone into their drama." (04:41)
- Angelica: New hostess with Taekwondo skills and a pratfall entrance during the staff photo shoot, setting her up as both lovable and potentially doomed.
- Ben (about Lisa hiring Angelica): "She’s gorgeous, she’s lovable, she’s flexible. She put her angle behind her head, right in the interview. Oh, God." (16:30)
3. The Infamous SUR Photo Shoot (06:29–23:00)
- Hilarity ensues as the staff prepare for a photo shoot, with the hosts riffing on the “legendary” status of SUR’s wall photos and the slightly less salacious direction of this season’s shoot.
- Lisa Vanderpump impression: “I remember what it used to be... Nobody had any clothes on.” (11:22)
- Guillermo and Lisa banter about menu “innovations” and the carefully curated staff. Their exaggerated politeness about whether people should disrobe for photos is sent up as classic Bravo hypocrisy.
- Guillermo: "...if you want to show your beautiful nipples and six pack, I won’t stop you." (12:58)
- Kim & Marcus show up acting affectionate after their previous explosive fight, confusing and annoying their coworkers.
- Natalie: “They literally get off on, like, screaming at each other.” (14:56)
- Angelica’s literal fall introduces her warmly into the group—in a move the hosts predict will make her a target.
- Ben: "She’ll be destroyed. She’ll be ground to a pulp." (16:04)
4. The Lazy Susan of Awfulness: Toxic Relationships & Gay Sidekick Syndrome (22:04–29:13)
- The hosts deeply analyze Venus’ frustration with Kim and Marcus’s toxic cycle, relating it to a classic “gay best friend” narrative.
- Ben: "As a gay, you’re often put in the Sidekick position... You have a plan, you’ve got the bullet points... and they just get back together. What about all that work?" (23:20)
- Ronnie: "It’s extremely immature. And it’s so weird to be mad at people for getting back together." (22:59)
- They agree it's unhealthy to get repeatedly involved with toxic people's drama, even as it makes incredible TV.
- Ben: "You gotta look inward and say, why am I going back to this couple that's toxic..." (27:09)
- Ronnie: "Absolutely lazy Susan. Lazy Susan of awfulness." (29:03)
5. Classic Vanderpump Confrontations & Circling Arguments (29:23–33:30)
- The cast’s petty conflicts spiral: Venus gets accused of over-involvement, Natalie wants affirmation as a “true friend”, and Kim tries to drag others into her issues.
- Ben: “This show is good because they are now all latching themselves onto this... It’s a gravitational pull.” (30:30)
- Demi enters and escalates tensions, refusing to hear her own name. The hosts lampoon the self-centeredness.
- Ben: "She’s like, I don’t want to hear you say my name today. So just, like, don’t say it even if you're saying it, like, in a good way. Like, I do not want to hear it. Like, I'm so serious." (32:19)
- Lisa and Guillermo play the voices of faux calm, breaking the fourth wall by reminding everyone there's a photo shoot to finish.
6. Shane & Natalie: Rock Climbing Date and Sharing War Wounds (34:16–43:41)
- Shane and Natalie go rock climbing, with Shane eager to showcase his “player with a heart of gold” persona while Natalie is only half-impressed.
- Shane: "Safety is crack, guys. Emotional safety. Yeah, I’m an evolved guy, but I also work out a lot." (37:07)
- Natalie opens up about her scoliosis and back surgery, making jokes about her 24 screws and suggesting she’ll live on through her “hardware.”
- Natalie: “If I’m ever cremated... there’s going to be like 24 people in this world who'll be able to, like, use my screws. And that’s just like a beautiful thing...” (40:03–40:18)
- Shane one-ups her with a tale about being shot three times by a friend over a modeling contract, adding tattoos as evidence and somehow spinning the trauma into a flex.
- Shane: "Yeah, man, I got shot. I was paralyzed. I rehabbed myself back, and I was still hot. Still got it, man." (42:05)
- Ben & Ronnie: Mercilessly roast the story, questioning its plausibility and laughing about models fighting with weapons.
7. More Staff Drama: Texts & Betrayals (45:29–50:44)
- Venus, feeling betrayed, shares a catty exchange of texts with Marcus—calling out Marcus and Kim’s “clown-ass relationship”.
- Venus: "I don’t want to hear about your clown ass relationship from you or Kim. Y’all just look stupid as fuck. There, I said it." (47:26)
- Kim and Marcus react to Venus’s condemnation, with Marcus admitting he started the fight but blaming Venus for escalating.
- Ben: "Marcus literally started this. You can’t be like, I admit I did write the first text, but his text was worse, so he really started it." (49:27)
- The hosts deliberate over who (if anyone) to root for, with Ronnie concluding: "I’m not going to be on anybody’s side. But for right now, Venus is grossing me out the most in this situation." (50:44)
Memorable Quotes (with Timestamps & Attribution)
- Ben (on the new season): "I'm fully committed. I was so entertained by this stupid episode. It was just what I needed." (02:19)
- Ronnie (on restaurant authenticity): "I really love seeing the pettiness in the restaurant and how everybody's turning against, like, one person at a time. It's just so fun." (05:32)
- Venus (quoted by Ronnie): "I've always known I was a star. I started writing memoirs in the fourth grade." (04:21)
- Ben (on Kim & Marcus): "They're toxic and awful... a couple that drags everyone into their drama." (04:41)
- Ronnie (on being the gay sidekick): "It's extremely immature. And it's so weird to be mad at people for getting back together." (22:59)
- Ben: "You gotta look inward and say, why am I going back to this couple that's toxic over and over and over again... Just let her cry on the curb like everyone else and enjoy a bacon wrapped hot dog." (27:09)
- Ronnie: "Absolutely lazy Susan. Lazy Susan of awfulness." (29:03)
- Lisa Vanderpump (impression): "[Back in the day] nobody had any clothes on." (11:22)
- Guillermo (impression): "...if you want to show your beautiful nipples and six pack, I won’t stop you." (12:58)
- Ben (on Shane’s trauma tale): "That is. You know, it's such a. It's actually a very scary story, but it's also such a stupid story... Like, are you in, like, west side Story?" (43:13)
- Ronnie (on whose side to take): "But for right now, Venus is grossing me out the most in this situation." (50:44)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- 02:19 – Ben’s wholehearted embrace of the new VPR reboot
- 04:21 – Venus’s self-mythologizing recapped
- 06:29–23:00 – The SUR photo shoot and recruiting Angelica
- 22:04–29:13 – The “toxic couple” cycle and the plight of being the gay best friend
- 29:23–33:30 – Group argument escalates (Venus, Marcus, Kim, Natalie, Demi)
- 34:16–43:41 – Shane and Natalie rock climbing, sharing personal trauma/stories
- 45:29–50:44 – Text fight between Marcus and Venus, shifting alliances
- 50:44 – Ronnie’s final stance: “not on anybody’s side”
Final Thoughts
This episode is classic Watch What Crappens—equal parts hilarious take-down and affectionate nostalgia for messy, low-stakes reality TV. The hosts highlight the joys of wading into “awfulness,” acknowledge their own complicity as invested fans, and delight in the show’s return to in-restaurant mayhem. Their segment-by-segment breakdown spotlights the hallmark pettiness, delusion, and unstable alliances that make Vanderpump Rules so entertaining. The podcast is a must-listen (or read) for fans who want to revel in Bravo's most gloriously dysfunctional workplace.