#3210 Below Deck Down Under S04E02 Part 2: Muffin Compares To You

Summary

Watch What Crappens Ep. 3210 Recap — Below Deck Down Under S04E02 Part 2: Muffin Compares To You

Released: February 10, 2026
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam

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Episode Overview

This episode is a riotous, detail-packed roast and recap of Below Deck Down Under Season 4, Episode 2 (Part 2). Ben and Ronnie dissect the chaos onboard — from toilet paper origami controversies and crew mishaps, to the over-the-top Real Housewives charter guests. As always, the pair champion Bravo’s messiness with sharp banter, playful mockery, and infectious enthusiasm. The core narrative: everything goes off the rails, muffins included.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Toilet Paper Origami Debate

[00:34–02:27]

• Tiffany launches into a passionate denouncement of crew members folding guest toilet paper (even simple triangles). "I just don't want your fingers on my butthole," she declares.
• Brandy (presumably Ben/Ronnie in character) is okay with the triangle fold, but not elaborate fans.
• Broader point: Yacht life is full of tiny indignities and boundaries.

Notable Quote:

"You don't shake hands and then wipe your eyes. So why would you, like, shake hands and then touch your butthole with that person's hand?"
— Tiffany [02:27]

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2. Real Housewives Charter Guest Shenanigans

[02:55–06:31]

• Ongoing guest drama about home-selling and friendship loyalty, featuring shade about 11-million-dollar mansions and chaotic attempts at self-promotion within the group.
• Hosts marvel at Jenna’s earnest desire to join the 1% — lampooning her “manifesting to be each and every one of these women.”
• Satirical asides about house staff ever breaking into “upstairs” society: “There’s no shame in those jobs…but rich people see you as the butler, that’s it.”
• Guests’ infighting is compared to sheet music from Aladdin: “That was just sheet music to the Aladdin musical. We all know.” ([05:52])

Notable Quote:

"These are women who’ve shot more than five scenes in Kirkland folding chairs in a parking lot. This is high glamour for them."
— Brandy [08:57]

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3. Beach Setup Chaos & Missions Gone Wrong

[07:14–08:53]

• The first beach setup is a disaster, and Daisy’s mortified that it happens in front of the guests — but hosts point out that Housewives are used to “lo-fi” glamour.
• Discussion of guests receiving massages, compliments about “magic hands” devolving into jokes.
• Pointed out: all the production panic is lost on guests who aren’t paying attention.

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4. Rich Lady Fights & The Art of Public Support

[09:21–10:32]

• Lisa and Meredith bicker about who’s the better friend; sarcastic returns/exchanges of “support.”
• “Do you have a receipt? Because it’s past 30 days since that support was given.”

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5. Galley Meltdowns & Alicia’s Rough Day

[10:41–14:08], [45:00–49:04]

• Alicia, the sous chef, faces Ben’s perfectionism and impossible standards for muffins and ice cream zombie heads.
• Calls to her mother and to Brianna (from last season) for emotional support.
• Her mom offers zero comfort, calling her a “nitwit in the kitchen.”
• Alicia eventually “can’t do it,” culminating in a breakdown with Captain Jason.

Notable Quotes:

"He tossed them in the trash. Tossed them in the trash. That’s the only thing I can do. They had nice tits. He threw nice muffin tits in the bin."
— Alicia (roleplayed by hosts) [48:21]

"Imagine how he feels, darling, having an absolute nitwit in the kitchen. Does he even let you use knives?"
— Her Mom (roleplayed) [13:42]

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6. Ben’s Artistic Temperament & Kitchen Antics

[16:38–21:08]

• Ben’s insistence on plating for visual “artistry” complicates logistics, with everything from Jenga-stacked crudités to lost biscuits due to kitchen chaos.
• He never misses a chance to roast Alicia’s lack of experience.
• "I base my meal on how's it going to look...a little deconstructed cheesecake looks amazing." ([19:41])

Notable Quote:

"You can’t just randomly throw things on the plate because the colors are not going to match. The shapes are not going to match."
— Brandy [20:44]

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7. Serving Snafus: Who Gets Fed First?

[18:26–26:39]

• Confusion around guest requests: some want lunch in their rooms, some at the table.
• Plates and cutlery go missing; food is ready but no one can eat.
• Ben blames Daisy; Daisy blames Ben; no one’s happy but the guests enjoy the chicken wings anyway.

Notable Moment:

"Who looks like a ding dong? Me. Me. That’s who."
— Tiffany as Daisy [26:02]

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8. Crew Backstories & Onboard Dynamics

[17:20–17:55], [28:14–30:10], [29:00–43:06]

• Betul’s story: her grandparents, not her dad, enabled her education and work on deck (“How did your dad not notice you were going to school every day?”).
• Mike, the engineer/stripper: “There’s no common denominator here. Except for lube.”
• Joao’s ongoing journey with body image, culminating in a nervous-yet-triumphant strip tease.
• A montage of gentle teasing about performance anxiety, and Mike’s pro-stripping tips.

Notable Quotes:

"The Ballad of Joao."
— Brandy (re Joao’s body shyness) [29:39]

"How Zimla Got His Groove Back."
— Tiffany (on Joao’s striptease) [42:26]

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9. Housewife Drama Reaches Peak

[33:34–34:24], [34:41–40:58]

• Brittany drops a “TikTok mistress rumor” bomb, sending the Housewives into chaos.
• Heated accusations about cheating, bill-paying, and friendship — devolving into cacophony.
• Captain Jason tries (and fails) to remain neutral, literally walking out mid-argument.

Notable Quote:

"My husband does not have a mistress!"
— Guest Brittany [34:24]

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10. The Infamous Zombie Night

[32:01–38:46]

• Themed dinner: bloody cocktails, saws-in-head costumes, and ice cream “zombie heads.”
• Alicia fumbles the dessert; Ben berates her under his breath.
• Despite all, guests are happy...because they’re buzzed and fighting.

Notable Quote:

"I personally, I would have made them earlier and had them frozen. Personally, that’s what I would have done." — Ben (re passive-aggressive dessert advice) [35:34]

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11. “Muffin Compares To You” — Muffin Tragedy

[44:34–46:17]

• Alicia overfills the muffin tins (“They’ve got nice tits on them”) and Ben trashes the batch, sparking final existential despair.
• The segment that gives the episode its title—an epic saga of overgrown baked goods and dashed dreams.

Notable Quote:

"They've got nice tits on them because...do we have any more muffin dens?" — Alicia (roleplayed) [45:00]

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12. Alicia’s Breakdown & Exit

[47:56–49:33]

• Alicia laments leaving her dream life in Canada to return to this misery for TV.
• She resigns to Captain Jason, who reminds her “we already finished Joao’s ‘Feeling Fat’ arc, now this was supposed to be the ‘Alicia Can’t Cook Arc.’”
• Hosts agree: she’s out of her depth, and will not last the season.

“Run like hell, girl. Run.” — Tiffany [49:30]

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker (as/character) | Quote/Comment | |-----------|-------------------------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:27 | Tiffany | "You don't shake hands and then wipe your eyes. So why would you...touch your butthole...?"| | 05:52 | Brandy | "That was just sheet music to the Aladdin musical. We all know." | | 08:57 | Brandy | "...These are women ...in Kirkland folding chairs in a parking lot. This is high glamour..."| | 13:42 | Alicia's Mom | "Imagine how he feels, darling, having an absolute nitwit in the kitchen..." | | 18:26 | Brandy | “If I was told...you’re just gonna be served in your room, I’d be furious.” | | 26:02 | Tiffany as Daisy | "Who looks like a ding dong? Me. Me. That's who." | | 29:39 | Brandy | "The Ballad of Joao." | | 32:01 | Brandy | “What better thing to accompany a zombie dinner...than some strippers?” | | 35:34 | Ben | "I personally, I would have made them earlier and had them frozen. Personally..." | | 42:26 | Tiffany | "How Zimla got his groove back." | | 45:00 | Alicia (paraphrased) | "They've got nice tits on them..." | | 48:21 | Alicia (breakdown) | "He tossed them in the trash. Tossed them in the trash...They had nice muffin tits..." | | 49:30 | Tiffany | “Yeah, she needs to run like hell, girl. Run.” |

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Final Takeaways

• Food service chaos is relentless and always funny — this time, Ben’s Chef-from-Hell routine and Alicia’s suffering fuel much of the mess.
• Charter guests’ drama rivals any Real Housewives reunion, with plenty of fourth-wall-breaking humor from the hosts.
• The episode is a masterclass in live-taped satire: every mishap is a chance for Ben and Ronnie to riff, clown, and celebrate the glorious mess of yacht and reality TV life.

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Note: For even more laughs, listen for the running gags about Zim (Zimbabwe), “tits on muffins,” and the ever-expanding roster of ridiculous sponsor nicknames at the end

Transcript

[Brandy]

Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens? When there's so much that happens. Hi, everyone. Welcome back. This is part two of a two part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. Subscribe. So that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that. Let's get right back into the episode.

[Tiffany]

So Eddie is checking on the anchor and Joao's like, we're not going to use the starboard again if we can help it. So they're talking about that. And then Mike, who is doing origami with the toilet paper. Can we stop doing origami with toilet paper? Just stop it. That's done that. That's been done by a cleaning lady who's really lovely.

[Brandy]

But.

[Tiffany]

But I just don't want your fingers on my butthole. And I don't want to waste the paper either. You know what I mean? Like, I don't need your fingerprints on my butthole.

[Brandy]

Are you not even. Are you not even down for just like a simple triangle fold?

[Tiffany]

Not unless you're wearing gloves or something. Don't touch my toilet paper. I don't like it. I like to see my. Here's what I like my toilet paper dangling exactly at the level that I left it dangling because then I know it wasn't touched.

[Brandy]

Yeah, I'm okay with.

[Tiffany]

I'm.

[Brandy]

I'm fine with the origami. I actually, I actually don't love when it's like all frilly, like the way Mike did it, where there's like a fan shape that's been folded into it because then you have to like actually take it apart. Whereas a simple like triangle fold that's like, start here. I like that.

[Tiffany]

Yeah. Okay. I just picture your fingerprints on my butt. I don't like it. So.

[Brandy]

Yeah, but it's not like. It's not like what I'm putting on to the fingerprints is going, is like some beautiful cherry blossom that can not be sullied by. By some fingerprints.

[Tiffany]

I'm.

[Brandy]

I'm. I feel like I'm doing worse things.

[Tiffany]

That's like before that comes out of the paper. Yeah, that's true. Like poop comes out of there. But then that's another thing, because poop, that's like what you use for poop. So, like, I don't need it to look prettier. Like, you don't need to make me think it's a flower. Like, I know it's what poop is going to be over in a couple of minutes.

[Brandy]

Yeah.

[Tiffany]

I want the thing that I'm about to get dirty to be very clean.

[Brandy]

Okay, Yeah, I get it. No, I think there's logic to that. There's logic to that. Fingerprints, etc. Yeah, you don't.

[Tiffany]

You don't shake hands and then wipe your eyes. So why would you, like, shake hands and then touch your butt hole with that person's hand? You know what I mean? Okay, so Jaws, they're talking. They're not talking about that. I'm just disturbed by it. He's like, this is the most, most feminine thing I've ever done in my life. Which, no, it's not your hair. And Jenna's like, oh, I wonder how breakfast is going. If they're like, strangling each other already.

[Brandy]

Yeah. And we cut to Angie. Can I ask you a question? I'm so curious. You're telling her that I'm a horrible friend because I'm not using you to sell my home. And Brittany's like, your house is not selling. I totally forgot about this fight. Well, I have an executive custom built home with 360 views of Electra on her horse. It's $11 million if you want somebody's business. I don't want your business. Okay. I don't need your business. So Jenna tells us I'm manifesting to be each and every one of these women. Growing up, we lived a comfortable lifestyle, but my parents worked their asses off and they used to count every penny, and that is just not going to be my life. I got into yachting to become top 1%, and I believe this job is a gateway to that. These women are on a yacht in Kanawan, bitching and moaning like, I, I don't know how to break into this poor girl. I do not think by volunteering to being literally the help that that means you were somehow on the fast track to being the upstairs.

[Tiffany]

Well, fast track. But I think it can happen. You know, I've watched, I've read a lot of Sidney Sheldon books. I've seen a lot of movies. Of course it can happen. You know, you can meet the right person.

[Brandy]

You know, I want to be a captain of industry. I want to work at the country clubs. I want to be on the polo horses. That's why I signed up to be the butler. I'm like, you know, I don't. There's no shame in those jobs. I mean, I guess, I mean, there is that movie, the Butler. There's no shame in those jobs. But I just also feel like when it comes to, like, Rich people that the moment that they see you as the butler or this, the stew, or the help, they don't see you as anything other than that, you know?

[Tiffany]

Well, that's why you change your name and your haircut.

[Brandy]

Well, I love when that happens.

[Tiffany]

You know, you don't just go like, hey, remember me? I was waiting on you last season. No, you show up as a different person. You're like, hello, it's me.

[Brandy]

I'm not. I'm not Jenna. I'm Belinda Valerie, and I have a bob.

[Tiffany]

Yeah, But I love that she's the only one who really enjoys the Housewives. She's like, they're amazing. I want to be them. I love them. So meanwhile, the fighting is still going on, and Britney's like, it was an olive branch with me trying to sell your house. She's like, it's not good business to complain about me and then want my house. And Jenna's like, oh, God, aren't they amazing? It's like a masterclass of rich woman behavior.

[Brandy]

The first time that it's ever been said about the Real Housewives.

[Tiffany]

This is kind of funny because I forgot this part. When Angie holds up a folder, and it's like all these charts that Brittany has made about her house, and she's. This was. This is what Britney is doing in her downtime. And Brittany's like, you're welcome. I mean, it actually shows that Britney does research and is. She did a lot of research on your house. I mean, I'm actually shocked that Brittany did that much work personally.

[Brandy]

Please. That was just sheet music to the Aladdin musical. We all know.

[Tiffany]

She's like, wait a minute. What do you mean, I don't have another. I don't have enough bedrooms. A whole new world. What is this?

[Brandy]

Who is Prince Ali?

[Tiffany]

Well, Alibaba had them 40 thieves Shah Mahratti had a thousand taels but master, you're in luck is up my sleeves I've got a brand of magic never fails What? What? What is this?

[Brandy]

Wait a second. Why does it say the price of my house is ba ba da ba wah wah? That doesn't even make sense.

[Tiffany]

You guys, I need to put a pin in this because we got to get off the boat.

[Brandy]

So there's a golly, golly. Breakfast is cleared and finished. So Jason's like, all right, full deck, stand by anchor. Joao. No commentary on that. We know what it means in Zim.

[Tiffany]

Joel, get your hand off your dick. I can sense that that's where it is right now. All right, Sorry, sorry. Wrong Wrong four deck. Sorry.

[Brandy]

That was. That was Beelzebub, Jalzabub, whatever I call myself.

[Tiffany]

That's right.

[Brandy]

What does he call himself?

[Tiffany]

That's the bad side of me. He's gone now. This is a new jaw. Completely different. Captain Jous, above.

[Brandy]

So now it's time to go to the Tobago Caves in the Grenadines. And Heather's like, you know, we want to sit back, sit around, talk shit. It's like, all right, then drop them off on the other side of the beach with some snorkels and some towels. And I heard if we can get some sort of dirty snow in the background, that'll make them feel at home. So enjoy.

[Tiffany]

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Ben's like, nice, nice, nice clean cut. Swat that blade every time as well, please. My little. My little maple. My little maple ass now. Otherwise you'll up the. The egg white. All right. Oh, God. You just up the egg white. What did.

[Brandy]

So everyone. The women arrive on the beach, and. But the. Daisy's really upset because she's like, the duck team didn't lift the anchor on time. And now the whole day is going to be playing catch up. It's the first beach setup of the season. How we're going to have to do it in front of the guests. It's like being in bed with your hot hookup and slipping out a fart. It's mortifying. Or when you realize your hot hookup is just Gara. The settings a mess. The timing's off. The house halves don't need to know that. Distract, distract, distract.

[Tiffany]

So they don't really need to distract them because they're not paying attention anyway. Lisa's just. And also, it's like, oh, my God, I'm getting a massage. You have magic hands. And Betul's like, no, you have magic back.

[Brandy]

That's a funny. I did not pick up on that. That. She said that. That's a funny thing to say. You have magic back. Your back is mass itself.

[Tiffany]

You're not the first person who said that. That's crazy.

[Brandy]

It's just also funny that Daisy is so embarrassed that they have to set up this. This. This beach setup. And while the women are there and can witness it, I'm like, you don't seem to understand. These are women who've shot more than five scenes over the course of their show's entirety in, like, Kirkland folding chairs in a parking lot. Like, this is high glamour for them. It is.

[Tiffany]

So now the ladies are fighting about who's a supportive friend so Lisa is telling Meredith, who has been accused of being a bad friend. She's like, you know what? Like, I feel like you support me. You know, like Mary said, you know, like, I've told you, you support me in private. I mean, I feel like you. I feel like you do show. Well, I support you publicly as well, Lisa. Actually, do not be disgusting.

[Brandy]

Yeah, but I think, like, more privately. If you think about it, like, public, but, like, in a private way. Like, you went to a public space and then spoke privately into your phone. That's, like, how you support me a little bit.

[Tiffany]

Oh, so you don't like my support? Are you returning my support? Okay, do you have a receipt? Because it has been past 30 days since that support was given, and I will not return support without a receipt.

[Brandy]

Samara's like, yeah, you're not a good friend. You're just not. Okay, well, I didn't ask you.

[Tiffany]

Mary.

[Brandy]

And so Eddie's like, are they still fighting? And Mark is like, yeah, this is what rich people do to enjoy themselves. Sam's like, well, I think you're boring. I think you're. I think you're just. You're just like, meh. You're like, meh. That's what you are. Meredith Mar's like, well, I don't really.

[Tiffany]

Care what you think, Mary.

[Brandy]

It's like, okay, well, then jump in the river.

[Tiffany]

It's an ocean.

[Brandy]

There are no rivers.

[Tiffany]

Mary on her own planet. So now, back on the boat, Alicia calls her mother, and she's like, oh, my God, Mom. It's an absolute shit show. That chef, like. I mean, he's all over the calf. He expects me to know what to do. I literally have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. And the mom goes, what's his name?

[Brandy]

Ben.

[Tiffany]

Poor Ben. Cause he's having to carry you and me.

[Brandy]

You have Ben's number. I just want to call him and give him a little bit of support. Lisa's like, no, I'm being dragged through this, Mom. It's hard to put into words because the second he gets really bad, then he gets okay again. Like, he shouts and he says he's sorry. And then it's, like, really hot in the galley. And it's just like, yeah, dog.

[Tiffany]

It's like, oh, yeah.

[Brandy]

So you're driving him mad, aren't you? That's what sounds like. Poor guy. Send him a little bit of a basket.

[Tiffany]

I'm unraveling, Mom. Just say to him, look, I know I'm. But I'll try and give you A hundred percent of my. Isn't that something?

[Brandy]

Please.

[Tiffany]

Nothing'S going downhill for you.

[Brandy]

That was a reference to you deciding to go skiing instead of getting an actual skill set.

[Tiffany]

Which I told you not to do in the first place. Cause you're.

[Brandy]

You understand?

[Tiffany]

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[Brandy]

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[Tiffany]

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[Brandy]

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[Tiffany]

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[Brandy]

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[Tiffany]

So the mom is just giving her so much shit and it's so funny to hear. She's like, wow. Well, imagine how he feels, darling, having an absolute nitwit in the kitchen. Does he even let you, does he even let you use knives? I mean, I imagine it must be be difficult for you trying to prepare things with a spork, which is the only thing you've ever Been allowed to use since you were a child.

[Brandy]

It's like, oh, thank you.

[Tiffany]

Thank you so much for the pep talk, Mom.

[Brandy]

Chuck.

[Tiffany]

Love you, darling.

[Brandy]

On the beach, Heather is. No. She wants to go snorkeling. And the. The staff is helping them. And Heather sees a turquoise.

[Tiffany]

There's a turquoise.

[Brandy]

A turk. I mean, the. The water is turquoise. I thought.

[Tiffany]

But there is a turtle as well.

[Brandy]

There is a turtle. That's. I was like, I could have sworn there was a turtle, but I said, the water. I read turquoise as if it said turtle and tortoise mixed together. And my brain spat that out. But the point is this. She loves the water. And Eddie's like, I love being in the water. This is why I'm in yachting. I bet no one saw this, that when Heather said that the water was turquoise, that this would turn into a tragic backstory. But here it is, everyone.

[Tiffany]

Well, it starts with him going. It starts with him going, okay, we're going this way because there's turtles over here. Turtles over here. And so he's like, my father died. That's why I'm in yachting. And I was like, oh, my God. Did a turtle kill your dad? Because I was just waiting for the lead in. Like, I need the lead in. You know, there Needs the lead in. Needs to make sense with the story.

[Brandy]

Yeah, the pivot was very quick. I love being in water. That's why I'm in yachting. My dad died when I was younger. I was like, oh, okay. Two days before I turned 6, he passed, sort of just a complete freak heart attack in New York's day. And he was just the greatest person, and he loved water. And now I love water. So it's a. He chokes up and everything. He's just. He's says that, you know, it's nice doing something that he knows his dad would be proud of him doing. And then Heather is like, I saw a stingray. It was like Nemo. And I said, stingray, why don't you bleed everything to the blogs?

[Tiffany]

I'm back on the boat. Jason is telling Jenna she's really gonna shine extra when she gets an extra stew. And she's like, well, I'll get a lot more rest, that's for sure. And he's just like, yes. He's got such an odd energy. So then back on the beach, Daisy announces that the tender is here. And Heather's like, let's go. I'm ready here. Why don't you sit on my lap? I'll do the steering. Did you hear my Finding Nemo joke.

[Brandy]

And then Diz like, okay, motor yacht. Katina, we're approaching the yacht. You're coming back. So they give everyone rum punches and stuff. And then Daisy announces that they'll be doing 4pm lunch on the sun deck. Okay, everyone, all hands on deck. Because we're getting to the moment. The moment for Ben. Okay. But lunch is coming up.

[Tiffany]

Actually, do you think we could swap the lunch? Because do lunch in the saloon in the AC and dinner on deck. Okay. Okay, that's absolutely fine. Is that okay? Yeah, it's absolutely fine. Why does your head look like it's gonna pop? It's just how my head is. Just how my head is gonna.

[Brandy]

Fuck. Jenna. Okay, you're ready. They wanna do it in the saloon. Did they just say lunch in the saloon? Yeah, come on, let's just do it together. Jenny goes. Fucking assholes. So. So now Daisy's like, ah, it's like hurting children. It's still looking like a 4pm lunch at an 8pm dinner. So now they have to, like, move everything from outside to inside, which is annoying because it takes them a very long time to set these tables.

[Tiffany]

So now Betul's backstory. She's unloading chairs, and she is saying that working on deck was considered a man job where she's from. And her dad didn't even want her to go to school because his mentality was, women don't work and it's a man's world and they don't want us to rights or words. But her grandparents snuck her into the school. That's amazing. And good for you, by the way.

[Brandy]

Yeah.

[Tiffany]

And also, how did your dad not notice that you were going to school every day? That's just like, whatever.

[Brandy]

That's a great question.

[Tiffany]

It's like, whatever. Stop doing woman thing.

[Brandy]

She just has a dummy in the bed that's like, connected to her rope to the door. It's like, patula, are you okay? You're still sick? Okay, we'll check back later.

[Tiffany]

No. So Jason compliments her on her work. Okay. So then Heather's like, well, I'm not lunch. I'm not up with lunch for everybody. I mean, it's not gonna be bitchy if I just do you, me, Mary and Angie. When he's like, I'm actually. I fully agree. I need a break. Like, yeah, yeah.

[Brandy]

So now Jenna has set up the table, and Heather is like, hey, Daisy, is there any way that we could clear a few of those plates? And we're just gonna have four for Lunch. I would like the other ladies just to be served in their rooms. Is that possible? If I. I'm telling you, if I was told, like, yeah, I've decided as the primary, you're just gonna be served in my. In your room. I would be furious.

[Tiffany]

Yeah, I would too. So she goes to tell Ben, and she's like, my patience is being tested. He's like, lay it on me. All right, well, lunches in 10 minutes, but they want four served in the room. Seems like, ah, makes sense. Who cares? It's like, but it has to be plated, so it'll all be plated. So we're not gonna do family style anymore. So we need to remove four of those plates.

[Brandy]

All right, Makes sense. All right. Jenna's like, so I've set the table twice. Nobody's coming to lunch. Okay. And he's like, all right, well, that kind of sucks for us because we're gonna have to start to individualize everything. And I've got. I've got fuzzy. Fuzzy fractures over there in the corner. Trying to figure out what even a plate is in the first place. Doesn't make sense. Fuzzy fractures. Just imagining that she probably broke her leg at some point, and I gave a nickname to that. Are you following my creative process?

[Tiffany]

So Heather, Whitney, join Angie and Mary. So Heather's like, low key lunch with the low key ladies. Am I right? Did anybody hear my Nemo joke? It was scared. So Jenna is confused about plates, and Daisy's like, no, we're going to bring the plates down. It's going to get placed. All right? That's how we're doing it. And meanwhile, Ben's like, I don't think you should plate them. But she asked for them all plated. Well, that doesn't really. Oh, no. Alicia says that she asked for them all plated, though. She goes, well. He says, well, that doesn't really concern me. It's what's going to look best. Who cares what she asked for? We're here for how it looks. Because growing up, I wanted to be a portrait artist. I was very good. You know, coming from an art background, it does help cooking. So I base my meal on how's it going to look? And look at here, little tiny Ben, Little cucumber nose. Look at that adorable little man make his hair with a little deconstructed cheesecake looks amazing. Let's. Let's make a. Give the chicken wig here. Give the chicken wig here. What a handsome bastard.

[Brandy]

Yeah. You can't just randomly throw things on the plate because the colors are not going to match. The shapes are not going to match. So, unfortunately, there's just more to it than that because he makes these, like, plates. Plates of, like, chicken wings and crudites. But he stacks, like, the. The crudites. It's actually. It's just like, the celery that's on the side of wings. He stacks it in, like, a lattice pattern. Like a little, like, a Jenga stack. I'm like, okay, that's nice.

[Tiffany]

But I know they should have saved this monologue for maybe a different dish, because he's like, I'm a portrait artist. I believe in art. I'm not serving anything that doesn't look like art. And then it cuts to a plate of chicken wings. I know.

[Brandy]

Seriously, it's like, okay, well, so they. So basically, yeah, he's like, serve the people in their rooms first. So then Whitney's like, I'm really hungry. I'm hungry. And Ben's like, oh, I don't want to look like, okay, there's still guests. All right, so let's make that look okay, I guess. All right. You know, you just put the celery into the. Into the food process. You can't serve the blender cup to the. To the guests, honey. That's not gonna work, honey.

[Tiffany]

But I'm not, though. It's like, yeah, yeah, just do it right. Do it right. Oh, my God. And he's like, I'm not going against Daisy. Despite her. It's just. This is our department. We do things the way that we want to do the things in our department. So meanwhile, back at lunch, Whitney's like, I'm hungry. Where's the food? Now it's 407. And he's like, but I don't want it to look like shit. They still guess, you know? And Heather's like, I feel good, but I am hungry. I am hungry, too. So Daisy's like, all right, we've got four guests at the table. We need to do it. We need to do this.

[Brandy]

But meanwhile, the people.

[Tiffany]

The.

[Brandy]

The people at the table are supposed to be served first, but it's the people in the bedrooms that are getting served. And it's also using up all the. All the people on the staff because they're all just. All these dishes have to go in different places. And so he's like, daisy, how long until the food. She's like, ha. It's coming right away. Do you copy, Galley? Where's the food? And Ben's like, daisy, Daisy, Daisy, we can do the. In Room diners really quickly.

[Tiffany]

First.

[Brandy]

We're going to do them first. We just had to do it that way because I decided to do it that way. He's like, oh, God, me. So Daisy, you know, I think Daisy. Daisy's had it so easy all these seasons with her chefs on. Down on sailing yacht. And now that she has been, she's going to be like. Like, she's just going to lose her mind. She already is losing her mind. It's only one first charter, and Ben is already with her so much.

[Tiffany]

So it's like, what? The actual author's the primary. That means she's the most important person. Check. Let's get the food going. Come on. Yeah, I wonder. I worked up a big appetite.

[Brandy]

We need to serve lunch at the table first. Like, the guests are chaotic now. Ben is chaotic. Give me a break. So Whitney's like, how long into the food?

[Tiffany]

I want food.

[Brandy]

Hungry, hungry, hungry, hungry.

[Tiffany]

You're still obnoxious. You've changed the lunch plans three times now. Okay. You can just sit tight.

[Brandy]

Yeah, seriously. And Ben's like, daisy, is there any way we can do the dinner? The room Diners first. Come on. They're ready now. It's like, yeah, copy that. Can you just give me a second, please?

[Tiffany]

Oh, God.

[Brandy]

So Ben is like. He basically just goes rogue, and he just starts telling the servers to. To. He starts having them go to the rooms first, but then the people upstairs aren't being fed, and no one's available to do anything, and it's just a total mess.

[Tiffany]

Yeah. So Daisy's serving champagne, and Alicia is like, can I go with this plate? And he's like, yeah, yeah, just go. Just go. You guys are gonna need to pull up more people, please. Please. I need more people. Get the homely people who are never on camera. I don't even care when he's like, what's going on? This is very weird. I need food. Shut up. You are the ones who mess this up.

[Brandy]

I know. Seriously. But that being said, Daisy said, like, it's Daisy who decides who gets the food at what time. Right? Like, that's her department. Not. It's not up for Ben to decide that. So Ben is. But Ben is telling. Not only is he telling people to do what to do, but then he's saying, oh, God, I'm always waiting on Daisy. What the man? What? Daisy is running around in circles because of you. So now food is starting to come up to the table, and Ben brings up the food to the table, and he brings. He brings it all up in these bowls. But since Daisy has been pulled in different directions and Daisy was not aware that the food is going up the table at this point, no one has any place settings, which is a bit odd also, because there are people sitting at the table. How do they not have their place settings? But they don't have any plates or forks or spoons or there's nothing to serve.

[Tiffany]

I guess because they were complaining about moving lunch from outside to inside. And she said, okay, I'll do it with you. So then where are the plates and the forks? I was confused.

[Brandy]

I don't. I don't know what's going on here. So. But the food's there, but they don't have utensils, which is a really bad look.

[Tiffany]

Yeah. So Heather's like, plates would be great. Ben. Ben. Ben and I had a plan. And then he marches up with platter surprise. There's no plates. And who looks like a ding dong? Me. Me. That's who.

[Brandy]

So.

[Tiffany]

But they love the food, which is. Yeah, they love it. And Heather's like, serving serve me like, I'm a rich Roman king.

[Brandy]

How could you say that in front of me? I am Greek. And so Jenna's like, well, I don't really understand what's going on right now. Well, Ben's like, I'm serving the other four first, and I'm not leaving four guests in here in the primary without a drink. And I'm like, you'll get it when I get. When I get it. Like, I stood there looking. Looking at my fucking asshole. I looked there like a fucking asshol up there. So Heather's like, you guys, the food is delicious. See, I'm a good customer. You can't say I'm bad just because I made you move everything around. Because I'm being nice to you now. Yeah.

[Tiffany]

So Jenna checks in with Ben. She's like, how's my favorite? He's like, oh, go googly. And Eddie tells Alicia that he swam with a turtle. And she goes, what? He's a swam with a turtle? She goes, did you? He's like, it was huge. It was like the size of the table kind of big. I mean, it was taller than me, I'm sure. Look down on me.

[Brandy]

It was. It basically was like a blimp. And I was the passenger, so I'm so small. So Mike is like, do you fancy her? And he's like, yeah, do. And then they laugh and everything. So Heather goes to take a nap, and Alicia's asking how she can help, and he's like, all right, well, I'm thinking about dessert tonight. We want the sort of the body of a zombie thing. It's gonna be something you really can't mess up. Just scoops of ice cream that you can put some little jelly beans into. Okay, honey buns, can you do that? Here comes one right now.

[Tiffany]

So Lisa is asking for a diet Coke. And then she's asking Mike, if you know what, can you just let her twerk on you? I mean, that's like the best gift you could give her. Please. It would like. It would be a gift for all of us. And he's like, oh, you wanted to do that. She goes, yes, please. So now tonight they're gonna have some strippers. And Daisy's like, well, he is a part time stripper. And Lisa's like, oh, my God. Thanks for cluing me in on, like, our little stripper. Wow. We have, like, a little single stripper.

[Brandy]

Wow. So he tells us his backstory, which is, throughout the past five years in. In between engineering gigs, I stumbled upon the world of stripping and the world of stripping and the worlds of engineering are two completely different places. There's no common denominator here. Except for lube. He.

[Tiffany]

I'm sure that one thing Mike has in common with a stripper is that Mike is told to go back into the room and shut the door every time he comes back out. Because no one needs this.

[Brandy]

A lot of. Yeah, a lot of oil. So, yeah. I mean, what better thing to accompany a zombie dinner with people wearing saws in their head than some strippers? Sure.

[Tiffany]

Than some discount dick.

[Brandy]

Yes.

[Tiffany]

So now, let's see. People are getting ready, and the boys are talking and planning for the evening, and they want a lap dance. And Mike's like, oh, everybody's gonna have to strip. And Trial's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I can't, I can't. This is bad. I don't know. I'm so shy. I'm shy. Oh, God. I'm no strangers to performances, but do I feel comfortable? No. Because from a very young age, played the music. I've always been body shy. I've been teased by my brother about my weight. I've always been the person to go to the beach with my shirt on.

[Brandy]

The Ballad of Joao so now Mike is. He's like, let me show you how to do it. You put your hands on her like this and you go, a little bit of this and a little bit of that. You know, I'm there. Put them all over your hair, Sergio. I Was like, it's very intimidating making myself look like an absolute clown next to a professional. I'm like, I don't. I think this is the best possible scenario to make yourself look. Look like a capable stripper is being. Doing it right next to Mike.

[Tiffany]

Listen, at the very least, Mike's hair. You know what I mean?

[Brandy]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Tiffany]

And Eddie's like, don't feel bad. Just do it next to me. You'll at least be told.

[Brandy]

So things are quiet, and everyone's saying, wow, it's so nice we finally have some. Some rest and relaxation on this boat. It's been so chaotic. At long last, things are chill around here. But we know what's coming next because Bronwyn and Angie are in their costumes. And here it comes, Angie getting her finger stuck in that door, and oof. Oof. That's. Every time they show it, I'm like. Because I actually just closed the door on my fingers, like, two days ago. And it was simple. Yeah, it was weird. I don't. You know, you're like, how does that happen? But I was, like, grabbing the door. Yeah, I was grabbing the door, and it, like, closed on me. And it hurt, but it was, like, minor, but it still hurt a lot.

[Tiffany]

And I almost did it in the car. I was close. I was. I got in the car, and then I hadn't closed the door, and for some reason, I grabbed it from, like, the top, you know, like the top of the door and started. It's like, what are you doing? You're gonna rip off your hand. Look what I just did to my fingernail. I was shaving the back of my neck, and I went like that to, like, feel where the hair is, you know? So I had my hand back there, and then I stabbed it with my razor and cut my nail all the way down into the nail. I mean, you know, humans, guys. Humans. Am I right? So, yeah, Angie pets her nail, and they're also wearing these stupid inflatable costume things. So they're running around in that bleeding everywhere. And Angie helps her. I mean, the captain helps her and stuff. And then now they're decorating for zombie night, complete with eerie cocktails, hauntingly beautiful decor, and Amenyatta. So she's like, I can't think of anything more appropriate when these women are ripping each other apart.

[Brandy]

So days, Daisy's like, all right, Ben, what's for dinner tonight? He's like, all right. Okay, here we go. Okay, well, the plan is to have something delicious, like a Bowl a scallop dish with a slightly soupy black lentil. And then we're gonna do a lamb steak knives, and then a zombie ice cream head. It all depends on what sort of dumb thing my sous chef does. Last time I looked, she was trying to bake a baseball. So we'll see. So Daisy's like, ah, is it a huge ball ache if I add Jason to that? He's like, no, mate, you're dealing with professionals here, love. Well, one professional and that one over there in the corner.

[Tiffany]

That's what I'd like to hear. So now they are doing water and wine at the tables, and they're all dressed bloody, you know, like, some have axes in their head, some have knives coming out of their face and stuff. And Heather orders bloody cabs all around. And he's like, I haven't touched this drink, Mike. He's like, I haven't touched this drink. But there's, like, lips. That's not my. I don't do that. I don't do that. I mean. Oh, that's Mary saying that to Mike. So Mike's like, okay, okay, I'm sorry. I was trying to figure out what the drink was, so I thought that's what he's figuring out. Anyway, Mary's gonna have wine, and there's lips all over her glass. And he's like, oh, sorry, I'll get you another one. So he goes down and he's mortified that he let this glass go out. So Daisy passes by, goes, oh, by the way, she just said that her glass had lipstick on it, but it didn't. I don't know. I mean, I put it down myself. There was no lipstick there.

[Brandy]

So, yeah. Crazy lady. So Daisy's like, all right, well, she has a fresh glass. He's like, yeah, I won't tell anyone, though, if you don't. So Daisy is like, all right, everyone, we're ready to start with service. Here we go. Ben's like, brilliant. This is actually quite good. So Ben is like, you know, he starts the food starting to go out. It's all this, you know, zombie type food. And of course, the ladies are fighting, etc. And, you know, this is where it's funny because Ben goes, how's the temperament up there so far? And then it cuts to Brittany saying, so I saw something on Tick Tock today about Seth having a mistress. Which is hilarious, because we know this sends off, like, this little comment, like, sets off the drama for the whole second half of the season of Salt Lake City. So he's like, how is it going up there? So you're like, don't ask. Here we go.

[Tiffany]

My husband does not have a master. So now they're being served drinks and she's just because your boyfriend breaks up with you anytime he wants to sleep with someone else, that's your problem.

[Brandy]

No, I break up with him. So Daisy's saying how it's starting to become, like, white noise for her. And they sort of do this whole funny thing about, like, white noise. And then while Ben is there, the food's coming up, food's been cleared, whatever. And Alicia's big task is that she's going to make these ice cream zombie heads. And Ben is like, all right, can we get the ice cream done, please? Get the ice cream balls done, please. We can put them in the freezer. Because the whole thing is that he wants them to set up and have their zombie head shape when they go out. And we just see that, like, Elisa's doing a million other things. The ice cream is just sitting out there. There's like eight ice cream balls. And she's in a hot kitchen and she's just going off doing this thing and that thing, whatever, and the ice cream just sitting there. And Ben's like, can you tend to the ice cream, please? You just have to literally put a chocolate chip on top of each one of them and that's it. Can you please do this for me, please?

[Tiffany]

He's like, quick, quick, please, little Drew, please. It'll Drew.

[Brandy]

So meanwhile, upstairs. Stay away from me. Your hatred has been abundantly clear and I am not interested.

[Tiffany]

Still think I'm boring, honey. So they're like, oh, God. Jenna's like, well, the fighting was one. Oh, it was fun for a day or two, but geez. And it's like, enough with the fighting. Jesus Christ. So now it's 10:12, and the ladies are now on a full blown fight. And Mary's like, and I won't take back what I said. You're boring the kitchen. Ben's like, oh, my God, could you do the eyes? Zombies have eyes. Most of them, don't they? God, I hate working with ice cream. And by ice cream, I mean Alicia. I personally, I would have made them earlier and had them frozen. Personally, that's what I would have done.

[Brandy]

So passive aggressive.

[Tiffany]

Cacao, esophagus, come on.

[Brandy]

All right, grab them. So then he was like, just hand over the care, please. I'm like, there's balls of ice cream with eyes. It's like a melted snowman, each one of them. So they go up, but of course they like them. You know, they're like. Heather's like, look at these balls of ice cream. And Ben's like, you know, And I'm. By the way, I also cooked this. He. He pulls out, like, a tray of crisps or biscuits that he was gonna serve with the ice cream. He's like. And didn't go on the dessert because I was too busy fixing that. So that's great. Doing a great job, love. This is just my way of saying I love you. I'm just saying, you. It. You. You, me over. I made this. A whole tray of biscuits that didn't get to go out. But I. But on the other hand, you're doing great. You're absolutely wonderful.

[Tiffany]

Well, I would have somehow managed to construct them and keep them frozen. I know that that's not what we did, but then why didn't you? Because. I'll tell you why. Because I was actually seeing how you would cope with this dessert. It was a test. Because I want to see where you struggle, and I want to see how quick you are, and it turns out you struggle with everything, and there is no quickness at all.

[Brandy]

Well, I'll tell you where I struggle. It's always dessert and mains and appetizers.

[Tiffany]

All right, well. Well, we didn't really make the dessert, did we, there, did we? Because really, I mean, I made the chocolate. I made the coulis. You did mold the ice cream, but you didn't make it, did you? Really? It's an assembly. All right. I think it's a far stretch saying, we made the dessert brown sugar dumpling chin. Right.

[Brandy]

It's such a savage read. And I, like, I was cringing because, like, it was so mean, and it was also right. And I was like, oh. And he's like, all right. Alicia's like a bull in a china shop. Like, I don't know. I don't know what she is, but she probably can't do that, right, either. She's like a bull who, like, doesn't knock anything over. It's like, you didn't live up to the metaphor. So Alicia's like, he's been cheffing for over 20 fucking years. Have done it for two. Like, pick up the pieces that you're going to drop. Like, oh, I don't like that either. Like, two years in, you should be able to put, like, the eyeballs on the ice cream head. I'm sorry, Alicia.

[Tiffany]

Yeah. And he's like, she didn't actually make anything. Nothing. I mean, I Couldn't give a about the dessert. Oh, my God. Can't even cook chicken and chips without stressing the out. So then back at the table, Captain, Jason's like, like, the saw in your head.

[Brandy]

I know. The saw is so good. I love it. It's like someone got, like, really attacked. It's like Meredith really got, like, someone selling Meredith's hat. It's like. It's gross. Like someone's going the distance on cutting her head in half. It's, like, amazing.

[Tiffany]

Well, I think that we should talk about you and Jared and all the things he says about other people. If you want to talk about man and Whitney's like, the captain's with us. Come on.

[Brandy]

Captain. Don't leave if it gets heated. Please stay. Please stay. Well, I'm not interested in trying to interfere with my relationship because you're jealous that you can't hold a man down.

[Tiffany]

I'm not trying to interfere with a relationship, Meredith. I'm just bringing up that your husband's cheating on you on Tik Tok.

[Brandy]

The captain. What?

[Tiffany]

He thinks so.

[Brandy]

That's the captain. She's just trying to do anything to keep him there, you know?

[Tiffany]

So if a guy is paying your bills and goes and tells everyone behind your back he's paying your bills. He's not paying my bills. He told us he pays for your bills. Well, I don't know why he's saying that. Jason, can I speak with you for a second? Would you ever do that to a woman? Captain, would you ever say that you pay someone's bills when you don't pay their bills? He's walking off. He's already walking off in the middle of the sentence. He's like, nah, I wouldn't do that. Bye.

[Brandy]

So long. Daisy's like, I will get you your dessert, but you're not meant to be there. I like her vibe is like, don't worry, you'll get your ice cream. He's like, but will I still get my zombie head? You'll catch it. Just not out there. Daisy's like, this is like the apocalypse. This is how I envision the end of the world. Captain. Jason's like, look, I like engaging with the guests, and usually they're asking me a lot of questions. I can't even get a word in. I would have been eaten alive by them, I think. Thank you for saving me from the zombies. Wink a wink.

[Tiffany]

So now Daisy and Captain have their own confessional together. And she's like, have I just set the bar for the season? I don't have to do anything there for the rest of the season, right? And he goes, just keep doing that. Saving me with ice cream. That's all I need. All right. Geez. So then in another room, the guys are getting ready for their performance, and Joel's like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. The Dysmorphia. The Zimorphia. I feel. And back in the kitchen, Alicia's like, did it turn out okay? And Eddie's like, you hungry for a bit of cocktail?

[Brandy]

So now the guys go up there to dance, and Eddie's up there first, and he's like, there are two. He comes out as if he's being chased by zombies, and he's like, oh, my goodness. There are two seriously hungry men out there, and they are just bloodthirsty for single ladies. They better be naked. Oh, Heather, you don't have to put the hat on. The hat. Okay? They're doing the bit. You don't have to help them with their bit, okay? Let them just do their stripper bit. Yeah.

[Tiffany]

So Joao comes out and dances, and the. Just the. The movie music, like, climaxing when he finally finds the confidence to take off his shirt. I cried.

[Brandy]

What a personal arc for him. It's like, I'm hoping that everyone is distracted about what's going on, because I'm the stiffest zombie you've ever seen in your life. I'm like, that's kind of the zombie thing, I hate to tell you. And he's like, wait. She says, wait.

[Tiffany]

How Zimla got his groove back.

[Brandy]

How Drawza Bob got his groove back. Okay, so they dance, and Heather hugs Mike very hard. She's like, you're great. And Heather's like, captain Jason, we were cheering for you to pick us up. Picking them up. I mean, come on, get in the game. Come on, man. So anyway, they go. They go downstairs and draws like, wow. I feel like I was less awkward, but me, I was awkward. My legs were shaking. It was the scariest thing I ever did in my life.

[Tiffany]

Wow.

[Brandy]

Joao 13.0 is so humble when he has to do a shrimp tease.

[Tiffany]

So everyone's really proud of Joao for making it through that arc. And he's like, all right, let's focus on the main deck and get the water stains out. Oh, I can live again. I can live again. I'm free. And then in the kitchen, Alicia says hello to Ben, and Mike comes the next morning. Oh, it is.

[Brandy]

Yeah.

[Tiffany]

Okay, so it's morning time now. So now Daisy is asking Mike if he prefers interior exterior, and he's like, I can't. Picking Tuesdays. Yeah, I can't do that. You pick. You have to pack. He goes, well, where can I chat the most, do you think? Meanwhile, Eddie is saying hi to Alicia and complimenting the buns in her hair. And he's like, are those pigtails? And she's like, ah, they're horns. Devil horns. And Ben's like, he was definitely flirting with you. Might I suggest running off into the sunset within the next 10 minutes before I murder you? By the way, you're doing great. Love you.

[Brandy]

All right, Fizzy fibula. Unfortunately, you tried to run off to the sunset and crashed into a tree. That's too tragic. But so typical of you. So Captain Jason says hi to the fish. And he's like, hello, fish. Joaz lost a bit of weight. He's been busy. He's been a bit busy. I was like, it's a weird thing to say to your fish. And then Ben. So Alicia has to make muffins.

[Tiffany]

Oh, the muffins. Here we go.

[Brandy]

It's just one thing after another. She has to make muffins. And we see her doing them, and he's like, well, those muffins look strange. Yeah. What happened? What did we do? She's like, well, I added some chocolate. I. I know I'm probably biased, but I don't think that they look too bad. I think they've got nice tits on them. And we see the muffins and they're totally overgrown and, like, spread into each other on top of the muffin tin.

[Tiffany]

They've got nice tits on them because. Do we have any more muffin dens? Because they would be really good if we didn't fill them up so much, honey buns. All right? You just don't do that simple syrup face, all right? You don't overfill our pastry. All right, She's. Okay, I heard you, because. I know, but you've got to understand, pastry will rise by double, if not three times, always. And they look like.

[Brandy]

Okay, well, thank you. And Daisy's like, pretty early in the season to be bickering. Mike's like, yeah, it's going to be a long season. So it's like, babe, next time, let's not do that. So he. He dumps it. Dumps it in the trash. And she's like, what'd you do? He's like, well, I dumped it in the bin. No, on your face. I don't feel in my face. I was joking. It's in the bin. Oh, keep up, honey buns. So basically she's like, you threw out my muffins. And she's like, you could have given them to the crew. He's like, no, they were still too raw in the middle because you put too much batter in. Okay. And I needed the muffin tins for the guests, so I upturned them and threw the away because if I cooked them, then we wouldn't have time to cook the guest muffins because we only had those trays. And I wasn't trying to sabotage you or you just taking a long time and I'm already stressed.

[Tiffany]

It's like, is he serious? Like, I think he's trying to kill my self esteem. I mean, nah, go fuck yourself at this point, to be honest. So Daisy comes in looking for a juicer and he's like, there's like five of them. Come in here, babe. Or if you want, just put an orange between that one's mouth and just punch it down until juice comes out. So he leaves and Alicia's mouthing like.

[Brandy]

Fuck you to him. Yeah.

[Tiffany]

So she goes to the restroom and meanwhile Bronwyn's like, well, they're gonna have to replace the carpet in Heather and Whitney's room because we're gonna have to pay for this boat. I mean, there's makeup, there's fake blood and self tanner everywhere.

[Brandy]

Yeah, it's bad. So Alicia calls Brianna, the Katina stewardess from last season, who is like the, like the model who was stuck in this maybe relationship with Harry for a whole season. So she's like, hi, how's it going in the galley? She's like, it's a nightmare. Brie, stop it. No, I love Bri. She's part of my really cool circle in my heart. And it's just, it's not easy to stay friends after the season because it's so high paced. But I feel like I could tell her any crisis at any moment and she'd be there for me. So it's like, oh, my God, you are amazing.

[Tiffany]

You can do this. You've got this girl. Hold on, I've got another call. I'm just gonna just, just merge it into this call. Darling, it's your mother. You're terrible at your job. Just quit already. Just quit. You've got no hope of making it through the season.

[Brandy]

Mom.

[Tiffany]

Thank you so much for calling. I love to hear your voice. Love you too. Mistake. All right, have a good one.

[Brandy]

So she's basically like, I was living my best life out in Canada and I've never been happy in My life. And then my mom said, they want you back on tv. And I said, I don't want to go back. And she says, you better go back. You need to support me in my old age. So I went back. And then I had to leave it all just to come on this boat and basically be treated like this. I spent 15 hours of my day in the galley, and I can't. I can't do it for moments I can't live for. Just little moments of people coming out asking if I'm okay.

[Tiffany]

So then she goes up to see Captain Jason, and she, you know, has a big monologue. She's like, I can't do it. I can't do the galley. I can't do Ben's mood swings. I just can't. I'm doing my absolute best. I had children this morning. Muffin children. He tossed them in the trash. Toss them in the trash. That's the only thing I can do. They had nice tits. They had nice tits. He threw nice muffin tits in the bin. I've got to leave. I'm skiing. I'm skiing and I'm fucking. And he's like, well, you know, we had an arc built in. You know, we've already finished Joao's Feeling Fat arc, and I thought we were really going to get you in there till you couldn't cook, and then by the end of the season, you can cook. You know, that's sort of what you're supposed to do here. And she's like, I can't do it.

[Brandy]

It.

[Tiffany]

I'm out of here.

[Brandy]

Yeah, she's not staying. She's not lasting the season. She was not in enough of the trailer for the season. She's gone. She can't. She will. This is. And she's not meant to be there. She can't. She's. She's a. She's a really nice, sweet girl, but this is. You know, she's dealing with, like, a chef. Chef right now, and this is out of her league. And. And this is. She needs to get some more experience before she deals with someone like Ben.

[Tiffany]

Yeah, she needs to run like hell, girl. Run.

[Brandy]

Get out of there. Get out of there. Yeah, well, we're gonna get out of here.

[Tiffany]

Bye.

[Brandy]

It was a fun time.

[Tiffany]

Yeah.

[Brandy]

It's all over. Catch us later this week with more episodes. We got a whole bunch of shows coming up and go to get your tickets for the Crappies virtually in person, whatever you want to do. And join us on Patreon, and we'll catch you on the Next. Watch what Crappens.

[Tiffany]

Bye. Bye.

[Brandy]

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[Tiffany]

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