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- [00:08]
A
Who cares what happens when there's so much what happens. When there's so much that happens?
- [00:21]
B
Well, hello and welcome to watch what crappens. I'm Ronnie. That over there is Mr. Benjamin Mandel. Kirk Nunez. Hello Ben, how are you doing?
- [00:35]
A
That's my scientific name, Benjaminius. Hi, how are you? That's. Yes, I am of the genus Mandaloonius. How are you, Ronnie? It's happy Friday. Aren't you excited for today's latest shows to talk about?
- [00:52]
B
Yeah, we've got a lot of today we are doing Beverly Hills, the valley and Dun dun dun da Chwaters. So join us. We'll be here all day. So should you be. Everybody welcome to the show on the 27th of February in a couple weeks, less than a couple weeks. That's terrifying. Is. Well, no. Two weeks almost exist.
- [01:10]
A
That's two weeks from today.
- [01:11]
B
Yeah. Oh God, I'm not ready.
- [01:13]
A
Sorry.
- [01:13]
B
Is the golden crappies in Hollywood. It's going to be so much fun. Get your tickets. They're pretty much gone. So plan on getting live streaming tickets@watch whatcrappens.com there might be like 10 tickets left. If you do want to come get those at watch what crappens.com guys live streaming through kids we same night. It's gonna be amazing. Also if you want our video recaps or bonus episodes or newsletter which is free by the way and it's weekly or what else is there over there? Bonus episodes, videos, Discord, community, discord, all that good stuff. Go over to patreon.com and ad free listening. That's right. And also voting we we are just finishing up round one voting. So we've got all the nominations together and now it's time to vote on the actual that starts on Monday. Monday, Monday, Monday, Monday. So find us on social, you know, Instagram or Patreon or watchwithcraftpunts.com, you'll find links for it all there. Join us for that. We're super excited. Also we wanted to shout out our friend Sue Funk. Sue Funk. F U N K E Sue Funke is a comedian. She's a really close friend of ours, a really funny comic and she came out with her first comedy album today which is called Congratul. Sorry, like congratulations. Sorry. Mixed together. Okay, so go check it out. It's on all the streaming platforms. You can also find her links at the Sioux funk.com We love Sue. Go support Sue. Congratulations.
- [02:43]
A
I truly love Sue. You know people, I don't know if people realize just in terms of Because I'm gonna make it about us. But like, when we put on the crappies, it has become, over the years, it has become a full fledged, like, it is a production, a true production. And we call upon our friends to help us backstage with everything. And sue has helped out with the past few and like, her help has been. She's like thrown herself into it. And so, like, let's all give back to sue because, like, the. The show part of the reason why the crap. The crap is even is able to go forward is because sue has helped out so much. So everyone go listen to her album and thank you, Sue. You're the best.
- [03:21]
B
We love you so. We love you, Susie Q. Okay, so let's get on with Real Housewives of Boobly, Season 15, Episode 9 of Vacation and Manifestation.
- [03:35]
A
Darling, by the way. Okay, so I want to. I'm excited. I'm excited, Ronnie. So about two or three weeks ago, we went on to Amy Odell's podcast called Back Row. We were talking about Beverly Hills for an hour, talking about fashion. We mentioned this all before, and Amy asked us to give letter grades to various housewives.
- [03:56]
B
And.
- [03:56]
A
And she asked us about Rachel Zo. And I gave Rachel Zo a C. I gave Rachel Zo a cuz I like, because I felt like she's been fine but not anything special. And I. And she's not obviously very confrontational, but it's almost like the moment I gave her the C was the moment I felt like she bloomed for me. It's almost like, did I make Rachel Zo better? Was it me? Guys, can I take credit for this? But for real, I felt like the, the. I. I felt like the. The first half of the season, Rachel Zo was kind of just there and saying some things, but I felt like I wanted more from her. And then it's either either I wrap my head around Rachel Zoe or now Rachel Zo got comfortable enough where we could start to see kind of like a little bit more than just, I don't know, than what she had been giving that. Now she. I think she has really, like, become really good all of a sudden. In fact, I think the entire show has suddenly had a massive turnaround in the past two weeks. Like, I loved last night's episode. What do you think about all these things, Ronnie?
- [05:01]
B
I. I still like Rachel. I think she's doing great. Yeah, she took her midterm progress report and she was like, you know what? I'm like, going to be dead, but louder. And she's doing great. I don't know, Massive turnaround. I don't know.
- [05:16]
A
It's still.
- [05:17]
B
It's still, like, not her, but I still enjoy the show. I mean, you know, it's not one of the most exciting shows. I still always enjoy watching it. It's always a good hour. And I really like this one where they all calmly gave Amanda the business. I thought that was really funny. Amanda with her bullshit. Her bullshit business of charging people 50 grand to learn to manifest. Y' all, buy a book. It's $5. Get it on.
- [05:38]
A
That whole thing was hilarious. It was hilarious.
- [05:41]
B
Good. It was funny. And her dress was so stupid too. I'm like, I hope she cuts herself on that thing, because the dress is all, like, those golden butterflies, like, hanging off of it. And, you know, like, a paper will cut you, so that's gotta cut you, you know, in some way. And I was like, you deserve it. You. You robber. You burger.
- [05:57]
A
Well, I guess. I guess the reason why I call it a massive turnaround is because prior to two weeks ago or last week, the show was just fully boring. Nothing was happening. It was just scenes of them having dinner and just. It just was. Had no heartbeat whatsoever. It was just so dull. And then you had Rachel's blackout party. And then I was like, oh, signs of life coming around here. And then I was like, okay, now we have a good episode. And then this past, the episode we're about to recap, I thought was, like, legitimately very funny. And I think, you know, Dorit being unhinged is great, and I just think it's, like, going in the right direction, and I'm just, like, really happy. It's like, okay, the show, it's like. It's like it's come out of its coma. Okay, and now it's. It's fallen in love with Sandra Bullock, where I'm so happy.
- [06:47]
B
Its eyebrows are still a little weird, but we love it all the same.
- [06:51]
A
Yeah.
- [06:52]
B
So here we go. We're at Rachel's house. She's like, I've got sunglasses on inside. Because I'm literally insane. Like, there are people in my bushes right now. It's crazy. Okay, Director of Business Development, Mary Elizabeth. Let's talk. Okay.
- [07:09]
A
So she's like, well, Rachel, we have some scheduling stuff to figure out.
- [07:13]
B
Wow.
- [07:14]
A
Like, I'm incredibly burned out already just by that sentence. Like, I'm like. I was like. I was like a candle. And guess what? All the Max just, like, went away, and I'm just, like, burnt out now. Like, I have not been to the Hamptons and I'm normally there the entire summer with, like, much more interesting and cooler people than I'm stuck with this summer. And I just. I can't do it anymore. I honestly miss my New York friends, like, so much. Like, so much. Like, I can't. I'm dead.
- [07:38]
B
Rachel's whole, like, I'm depressed without the Hamptons is cracking me up.
- [07:43]
A
I love that she's so right.
- [07:44]
B
Like, every week she's like, I can't. I can't live without being in the Hamptons. Like, what am I even doing here? I should be in the Hamptons right now. Like, what am I doing? I'm losing my mind. Please get me to the.
- [07:57]
A
Like, Rachel Zoe is so funny to me because I think that she's, like, blatantly status obsessed. Like, she's blatantly wants to. Like, there's, like, a crowd of people who's just like, these are, like, my people. But they're like, the cooler, more famous, more wealthy people. Whatever. Or maybe not necessarily more wealthy because there's actually a lot of money in Beverly Hills. But, like, there's a sense that she wants to be with the true fashion people, the true chic people. And she's stuck on this show because she had to. She had to. Like, Bravo offered a good deal, so she went for it. And she's like, I can't do it. I need to be with the chic people again. And it's like, you know, on a different show, we'd be like, wow, how pretentious of her. Like, she thinks she's better, but in this show, it's so funny to me. She's like, I gotta get out of here. I cannot be around Amanda Francis any longer. Take me to the Hamptons.
- [08:41]
B
I mean, look what happens in Beverly Hills in the summer. Amanda Francis, okay? That's who's in the Hamptons this summer. Get me out of here.
- [08:51]
A
I need to go to the Hamptons. Look how vulnerable I just was saying that I need the Hamptons in my life. I'm, like, so vulnerable about the Hamptons right now.
- [08:58]
B
Yes, The Hamptons is home for me. Like, I'm from New York. It's literally my happiest place. Like, it's where every major life event has happened. My ex proposed to me there. Every birthday I've ever had was there. Every single birthday I've ever had was in New York. It's pretty important.
- [09:16]
A
There are literally pictures of me naked as, like, a 1 year old in the dunes of Amagon. I could hear her to say, I'm against it. Like for an entire hour. You guys go to amagonset. Oh my God. I've been in Amaganza since I was 1 years old. Naked. Naked.
- [09:34]
B
Literal naked 1 year old pictures of me and Amaganza.
- [09:39]
A
Of course she loves Amagan. Because if she. If you say amagons the way Rachel Zoe says it sounds like she's saying, oh my God, oh my God.
- [09:45]
B
So then we do see little pictures of Rachel as a toddler and Amagan, but you know, you can't show naked babies on tv. So she's wearing like a little. They've like, you know, photoshopped like a little feather boa. You know, a cat can on her.
- [10:02]
A
Yeah. So she says, I hate petty mean girl. I hate it. I hate it, I hate it. And that's why this episode, I'm gonna make sure to take only two people to the cool place. Yeah, I gotta hate mean girl chat. Yeah, that's true.
- [10:20]
B
Huh? She's like, so I'm gonna, like, not include the non cool people on my track, you know, Like, I hope Kyle and Tariq can get along because nothing would make me happier. I mean, literally being in the Hamptons naked and I'm a concert. What? Like, seriously, if I could bring to read, like, Dorit needs to go out. Like, what? And then Kyle's like, I'm not drinking. Whatever. I get tired, blah, blah, blah. But you know what? One of my friends has like five bedrooms. So she's like, take my house, stay here. Like, I don't care if you have sober people who are tired. Bring them. Like, what do I care? We don't judge here. We're not mean girls.
- [10:54]
A
Yeah. I was like, just do whatever you can do to get me back to amigan. So Rachel facetimes Dorit. And she's like, guess what, I'm about.
- [11:06]
C
To make you smile.
- [11:06]
A
She goes, wow.
- [11:07]
C
Well, I'm. I'm so excited. I don't even know what this is yet, but I'm already so excited about it.
- [11:11]
A
Well, don't get that excited, okay? It's not like I'm taking you to Amagazon. I want you to come to the Hamptons with me.
- [11:24]
D
Honestly, you don't even know how much I need this.
- [11:32]
B
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- [11:53]
A
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- [12:14]
B
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- [12:22]
A
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- [12:26]
B
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- [12:31]
A
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- [12:44]
E
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- [13:11]
A
It's like, did someone's soul literally get ripped from their body? Was there a horror movie happening?
- [13:27]
B
But here's the thing. It's gonna be you, me and Kyle. Reverse. However you want to do that in your mind, just do a reverse version of that.
- [13:40]
A
Tariqo's.
- [13:41]
C
There's nothing that could make me upset right now. Not even the idea that that stupid little imp would be joining us at the Hamptons.
- [13:48]
B
So.
- [13:51]
D
Not even that that little cross eyed garden gnome will be joining us in the Hintons?
- [13:57]
C
Well, it's so nice to know that we'll be actually traveling somewhere with the real life Travelocity gnome.
- [14:04]
D
Things have been so shitty recently, so I don't give a shit where car left off. She's gonna have to play nice. And there's nothing that's gonna stop me from having food this weekend.
- [14:16]
A
See, Dorit is smart. Dorit. Dorit I think, sees literally.
- [14:21]
B
No one has ever said that, so I know. Sorry. The first time for everything.
- [14:26]
A
It's crazy. Things are topsy turvy. It's like I just manifested that. Dorit, I should say. I'm gonna say Dorita. Savvy. No, people don't say that. But the truth is Rachel Doritos poor. No, Rachel Zoe is. Dorit's on ramp into the inner Echelons of fashion, which is where Dorit, also known as the proprietor of Beverly beach, wants to be. It's like the Punta Cana. That's where you want to be. Okay. And so she's.
- [15:02]
D
Normally our suburb. The Punta Cana, that's where you go.
- [15:08]
A
So she is, like, Rachel Zoe is. Invited me to the Hamptons. I'm probably gonna get to go have dinner somewhere where, I don't know, Donna Karen's gonna come stumbling over to the table. I'm just gonna say yes. And I don't care what, like, what twists or turns that she throws my way. I'm just gonna say yes, no questions asked. So she gets it.
- [15:27]
C
And she's like, absolutely. There's no reason. I would never be upset with anyone who might join us on this trip.
- [15:32]
A
I mean, like, you could have had, like, I don't know who's Dorit's biggest rival? I don't know if she's ever had a big. A major, major rival.
- [15:40]
B
Garcia Vanderpump.
- [15:41]
A
Vanderpump. She would have been happy. She was, like, unfazed by the fact that Kyle would be coming on this trip.
- [15:49]
B
She's just getting somebody to pay for her to go out of town. She, like, literally doesn't care. She's going. And so she calls Kyle next. And Kyle is, of course, staring at herself on the facetime, like, fluffing her hair, like, oh, my God. Hi. Yeah. Like, looking at herself and all the different angles, like, kyle, do you not look at yourself enough? Jesus. It's like, well, you know how you've been talking, like, hot girl summer, and we've been having, like, an opposite of that. It's been, like, cold girl summer. Like, it's been pashmina summer, and I'm over it. We're going to the hamps. We're going.
- [16:20]
A
And Kyle's like, oh, my God. Well, yeah, I'm going to say yes. Yeah. Cool. And then Rachel's like, have you spoken to Doritz? And she's like, well, Dorit and I haven't spoken at all, But I have spoken to PK who's told me that she's cray cray, right? And Rachel's like, well, I also invited Dorit because I feel like she really needs to get out. Then Kyle, unlike Dorit, Kyle does, like, a whole face and looks left and right and is like. Like, totally registers her dismay. It's like, kyle, just say, thank you so much for the invitation. I would love to come to the Hamptons with you, but of course, she has to be so rude about it. And then she's always wondering why she's not viewed as a girl's girl. Yeah.
- [17:06]
B
I mean, I don't know. I don't know. My reaction of going to the Hamptons was to read be like, I don't know. That's a long time. Because you don't just go right into the Hamptons.
- [17:14]
C
Right?
- [17:15]
B
Don't you have to fly to New York and then drive to the Hamptons? Or is there, like, a little air. There must be a little airport out there now, isn't there, or.
- [17:22]
A
No, there is a little airport, but they did not take the. I think they were. They took the schlep route. The little airport, I think, is. It's a big pain in the arsenal. So I think you go to jfk and then you either take a car.
- [17:34]
B
Or you drive for a couple hours at least. How long is the yes?
- [17:38]
A
I'm like, put on a dice, right? Put on a dike to get out.
- [17:41]
B
Get on the jitney. Yeah. Like, sonia, Ronnie, I love.
- [17:44]
A
You're like, isn't it kind of a schlep to get out there? I was like, as if we haven't watched summer house for 10 years in a row. Watch them drive out there every single episode.
- [17:51]
B
That's true. And I've done it myself. And. But then the reason I was doubting myself is because I was like, well, maybe rich people, like, do, like, a helicopter from the airport to the thing. I mean, I don't know. I don't know what.
- [18:00]
A
Rich Mauricio is definitely doing the helicopter at the airport, I'm sure.
- [18:03]
B
But, yeah, it's like a schlep. And then you're. You're not only stuck on the plane with dorit, you're stuck, you know, in a car with dorit for three hours. It's like a whole thing, you know? So, yeah, I don't know that I'd be happy either, but, you know, you're shooting, so just go. So she needs to go.
- [18:17]
A
I was just trying to. You know, the thing is this. Is this the strongest anti Kyle point in the world? That she made a face when she was invited and it. You know, and knowing that she have to spend this fun time with dorit. It's not the strongest anti Kyle point, but I will. I just can't miss an opportunity to add another piece of evidence into the anti Kyle file, which is that, you know, Rachel invited her to go to the hamptons, which is pretty cool. And Kyle can't just say, oh, my God, yeah. Awesome. Just be like, sure. Like, no problem. I'm fine with Dorit. I'll be fine. And then so. And then she wants. And Kyle wants us to be on her side. I'm like, you're the one who is the. You're the. You're the guilty party in this situation. Even when you make your face on the FaceTime thing. I am done on this point, and we can move on.
- [19:00]
B
You don't have to be. I'm enjoying it.
- [19:03]
A
There's nothing more to say about it.
- [19:04]
B
I'm on the three hour ride right now to the Hamptons. I'm just like, whatever.
- [19:07]
A
The jitney.
- [19:08]
B
Yeah, I just pooped my. I just pooped my dip.
- [19:12]
A
I put my diaper on the jitney with that really important point.
- [19:16]
B
So now we go to Amanda's house, and her toddlers are all over the place. Kanan and Delilah and the assistants helping because Amanda is setting up for a party. And Amanda's like, oh, my God, do we get everything we need for the party? And she's like, yeah, we got bags and journals. Oh, God, the second I heard journals, I was like, this is not a friend.
- [19:39]
A
Bags and journals. Yeah. Amanda's like, and did we get copies of.
- [19:43]
C
For every one of my book rich as far? Because I'll sign it for them.
- [19:46]
A
I'm sure that's what exactly these women are looking forward to. Sutton, who's on the board of abt, is like, oh, I do hope I get a signed edition of the Money Queen.
- [19:55]
B
So rich as fuck. Can't wait. It'll be worth it just to see Reba flipping through it.
- [20:05]
A
I know. Reba's like, can I manifest an anvil falling on this ding dong's head?
- [20:11]
B
Yeah. So Amanda says, I feel like I'm not really understood by these women, so I'm going to have, like, a party and they're going to really understand me better. Amanda, they understand you and they don't like you, okay? It's not. It's not. You're not some mystery, okay? You're some lady who's taking pop psychology from the 60s, 70s, and 80s. That is like a dollar in the used bookstore and repurposing it for $50,000 to board housewives who are going into extreme debt to pay for it, okay? You're a monster.
- [20:40]
A
Yeah. Yeah. You're. You're the worst. So Amanda now does the ritual of FaceTiming everyone and say hi. And she has this, like, really high voice when she's trying to be nice.
- [20:50]
C
She's Like, I am having a dinner called the Manifestation Moment Dinner.
- [20:54]
A
And I was like, oh, wow.
- [20:56]
B
Love that idea. Love that idea.
- [20:59]
A
Sorry. I was talking to my dog, who just proposed me feeding him. I said, I love that idea. I'm gonna do that after this phone call.
- [21:05]
C
What were you asking about, hon?
- [21:07]
D
Listen, you could have just stopped at ma'.
- [21:08]
B
Am. Okay.
- [21:12]
C
Yeah, we're going to a man fest.
- [21:14]
A
Can't wait.
- [21:17]
B
So next is Sutton, and Sutton's like, wow, Manifestation.
- [21:20]
D
That's fun.
- [21:22]
B
That's fun.
- [21:23]
D
Great.
- [21:24]
B
And then Bose is like, what? Manifestation Party? What the hell kind of name is that? The name of name for Dick body is that.
- [21:33]
A
And they show Bose's. And she goes, no, I think it's gonna be a moment. And you see Bose's face in the FaceTime looking at her like, what's wrong with you, girl? Bose is like, I am so confused. You're ridiculous.
- [21:46]
B
And Amanda's like, I think it's gonna be a moment. It's like, oh, God. So Amanda says, yeah, like, other than a really small group of online haters, like, I'm typically praised for what I do. The bots I hire from China all leave me really good comments. So I'm not sure what these people are talking about, because I'm loved. So I'm gonna approach this at, like, you know, I'm not gonna. I'm inviting them into my home. I'm sharing with them something I love. I'm opening up my world. I'm talking about manifestation, and hopefully we'll understand each other a little bit better. Yeah, you're gonna look at the pages of those journals when you leave, and they're all gonna say redrum over and over again, page after page.
- [22:29]
A
Honestly, Amanda is such a great casting choice. Choice for the show because she is so full of it. She's so full of. And it is so funny to see everyone reacting to her like, it is just. It is pure comedy. I love it so much. I mean, she's awful. She's awful in so many different ways, but, wow, is this, like, not hilarious? So Amanda and Anna, her sister, are talking still, and Amanda's like, one thing.
- [22:55]
C
That I'm learning about these ladies is that they're all working on, like, big things and big goals. And when I'm in that situation, I try to manifest the that fact out of it. And I'm gonna just have them do some, like, classic journal prompts about manifestation at the table.
- [23:09]
A
So get ready, Sunstrack. You're gonna get a classic journal prompt.
- [23:13]
B
Yeah, I'm going to the Hamptons and because you're. You're all idiots. Matt is like. Journaling is like writing down your goals and your dreams and desires. It's an opportunity for self reflection, emotional regulation and clarity. Have you read any of yours? How could anyone like you write this stuff down and still believe words? You're so full of shit. So she wants everyone to create their best lives. And her assistant, who's making like a minimum wage and, you know, haringing kids and dealing, like, dealing with kids and all of this other shit is just like, wow, sounds like good vibes. I'm sure it works, which is why I'm stuck in this fucking predicament.
- [23:54]
A
I just started watching I Love la and it's basically if you took that entire show and just like poured it into one person, it's Amanda. Just ridiculous stereotypes of Los Angeles all just rolled up in one vapid, toothy person, soothy person. I don't know why. She just sort of has that like Cheshire smile grin, you know, like. Like a. Like a charlatan would. So now Dorit and so Tarit is in the backseat of the car. She's sipping a juice and sighing. Or not. Taker pointed that out, which I think is such a funny.
- [24:38]
C
Oh, geez.
- [24:43]
B
Well, Dorit solo in a car scenes are more the norm now because she doesn't really have anyone to get ready with or, you know, do all of that. So I'm really enjoying the Dorit.
- [24:52]
D
Like, well, we can at least do a scene of me sipping juice in.
- [24:56]
B
The car and she'll just draw the whole thing out of it. Like when she is like, I need.
- [25:00]
D
A cuckoo or I can't go on with my day.
- [25:03]
B
Remember in the first episode, walking around her kitchen talking about how much she.
- [25:07]
C
Loves Coca Cola, Driving down the street drinking G and juice in my Chevy Tahoe, laid back.
- [25:18]
D
I've spent months trying to get piquey to talk to me. I don't know what his intentions are. I don't know where his head is. Where is it? Where is his head?
- [25:29]
C
But he's walking around a torso, A torso without any heads. They said he went over to Sleepy Hollow. I said, what does that even mean? Where is his head? He's riding a horse. A horse made of Pringles. I don't know where his head is.
- [25:40]
D
He's just a sack of flour, wandering around VIP stations around the city making out with youngsters. I'm in limbo and I have no control. I need to do something about it. So I'm going to go Piss him off via his best friend, that restaurant. And it's called Lady Hawk.
- [26:01]
A
Lady Hawk, which, by the way, is a restaurant. The chef. I believe the chef of Lady Hawk is Charbel, who is on Top Chef 20 World All Stars. There you go, everyone. Little bravo Easter egg in there.
- [26:15]
B
So, Dorit, I just think it's funny. She's going into a place called Lady Hawk when she's, like, two steps from being that lady who has to hawk everything just to pay her rent. This is too on the nose.
- [26:25]
A
Lady Hawk too on the nose. Yeah.
- [26:28]
B
So go to Madre. Ask for some help.
- [26:35]
A
She needs to go to Voodoo Donuts. Maybe that's what she really needs to deal with the PK situation. So Dorit enters. So Mauricio was there, which means we get yet another scene of Mauricio on Bravo. Well, this is his home turf, but still, it's like a lot of Mauricio these days.
- [26:51]
B
And it's like his time in a week. Go away.
- [26:55]
A
And again, it's another scene of him looking at to read. Like he's trying to read something on his laptop. Browse and open. Then furrowed. And then trying to figure out how to zoom in. And then he zooms in too much.
- [27:08]
B
Oh, something's happening here. I sense lady feelings. Hold on. Let me give you my face for lady emotions. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
- [27:23]
A
He literally looks like. Is he. Is he auditioning to be in stock footage? It's like, I need some stock footage of. Of a man smiling. He's like, ha. Smile. It's like, now he's confused. Confused.
- [27:34]
B
We need stock footage for Google maps of somebody just lost. Okay, could you just give us lost face? I don't know what you mean. Okay, a woman is feeling something. Oh, what? What is that? A stoplight? What?
- [27:49]
A
I don't understand commercials. Here comes one right now. Carvana is so easy. Just a click, and we've got ourselves a car.
- [28:03]
B
See?
- [28:04]
A
So many cars.
- [28:05]
B
That's a clicktastic inventory.
- [28:07]
A
And check out the financing options payments to fit our budget. I mean, that's clickonomic delivery to our door.
- [28:14]
B
Just a hop, skip, and a click away.
- [28:16]
D
And bought.
- [28:18]
A
No better feeling than when everything just clicks. Buy your car today on Carvana.
- [28:26]
B
Delivery fees may apply.
- [28:33]
A
So, Dorit, orders for a classic dream.
- [28:36]
D
I'll have a Belvedere on the rocks. And I'll have three limones. And squeeze them in. Just squeeze them in and. But don't. God, I don't want to say it. I don't want to say it. Don't say carcass out.
- [28:48]
B
Don't say, look, she's trying so hard not to say carcass out, but you see in her face that she knows now she's gonna get a drink with three damn lemons taking up the space, and she's pissed that she doesn't want to give Mauricio the satisfaction of saying carcass out because she knows that he'll make fun of him in his mind. He'll make fun of her in his mind.
- [29:08]
C
Mauricio. I basically am a carcass in my own glass, thanks to PK and so.
- [29:13]
A
Well. Well, thank you very much for inviting.
- [29:15]
D
Me carcass out after I said it so many times. And then PK left. Turns out, manifesting does work.
- [29:25]
A
Yeah. Well, thank you for inviting me to do this. I hope I can be of help. I'm. I'm not here to take sides, only to advocate for PK side. Okay, Tell me what you want to say. So she's like, well, I would like.
- [29:36]
C
For PK and I to not be on opposite sides. Okay. I want to be. You know, because it's. The thing is, what's. You know what the old joke is about when your. Your mama is so big that when she walks around the block, she's around the block.
- [29:50]
A
I think you got that joke wrong. And I'm not.
- [29:52]
C
I'm just trying to make a joke about PK inside to lighten up the.
- [29:55]
B
Mood a little bit.
- [29:56]
A
Mauricio, I'm not really following the yo mama and the PK thing a little bit. You want to start from the top?
- [30:04]
D
Well, I literally cannot get PK to communicato with me, and I'm hoping Mo can nudge him to get on the same page, because that's what's best for the kids. Now, I don't know what PK Is saying to you, and he's like, well.
- [30:19]
B
You know, I know he'd like to have a schedule with the kids, you know, actually be able to see them.
- [30:25]
D
Well, I want him involved in their lives.
- [30:27]
B
Moo.
- [30:28]
D
I do. Involved. Involved in their lives.
- [30:32]
B
You know, I've.
- [30:33]
D
I've started covering little jaggy and powdered sugar just to get his father to pay any sort of attention to him.
- [30:40]
B
Doesn't work now.
- [30:42]
D
I've just got a child with allergies.
- [30:45]
A
Yeah, well. Yeah. Okay. Well, hopefully it all works out. Right? He just as like, doesn't know what to say at any moment point, and.
- [30:55]
C
I'm not restricting him from them at all.
- [30:57]
A
Well, I mean, so according to him, he's texted you asking to see the kids and asking to be with the kids.
- [31:04]
C
He has never texted me once asking me to see the kids.
- [31:08]
A
Well, he's shown me his phone and I've scrolled up and down and senior replies and his replies and conversations about the kids and conversations about him asking for a schedule, you know, and he's like, look this.
- [31:20]
B
He's like, I scroll up and I scroll down and I scroll up again, and I scroll down again.
- [31:26]
A
That's how, you know, I've done it because I can actually mimic the action of scrolling up and down with my finger. Yeah.
- [31:31]
B
Mo.
- [31:32]
D
Mo, listen to me, okay? Paint. Paint your painting. Offense.
- [31:37]
B
No, no, no. Okay.
- [31:39]
D
Wax on, wax off.
- [31:41]
B
No, it's not charades. I'm doing. I'm doing scrolling up and down on the phone.
- [31:44]
D
Oh, Karate kid. Got it.
- [31:46]
B
Nailed it.
- [31:47]
D
It nailed it.
- [31:50]
C
He will tailor a story and make sure it's very one sided. Mo.
- [31:54]
A
And Maurice is like, well, I mean, I've seen it all. Like, I promise you, I. I've seen the spreadsheets for his plan, for the money. I'm like, well, him having spreadsheets is one thing. Him actually communicating that or anything with Dorit is a whole other thing. You know, I. I don't know. I mean, it. When Marisa says he's seen the text messages, he. His vibe is kind of like, I. I've seen it. I've seen that he's texted you. It is kind of convincing. But I also have to imagine that this is very selective on PK's part to make him look like he's in the best light. And I just have to believe Dorit on this, you know?
- [32:28]
B
I mean, I believe PK too, though. I do believe that. Look, no one's gonna tell the. The exact whole truth. Like, she's getting her side to say her thing, and he's been using his side to say all of PK's thing. So they're basically just saying that the other one is a bad parent. You know, PK never shows up. Doritos trying to turn the kids against him. I mean, it's kind of typical in a divorce, but I do believe that PK's probably said, yeah, I want to see the kids, or whatever. Mauricio seen the text. I believe that. The thing is, PK is doing that so he can then show his friend, look, I sent these texts and she's not answering me. PK has been out of town months at a time. We all know that. He's not arguing that. So how Is he going to see the kids if he's not even here? And he's not. He's trying to cut the mom off for the money and leave her with this mortgage that he put everything in her name to fuck her over with. So PK is her over, no matter how. Mauricio wants to slice it and dice it and be like, okay, wow. He wants to see the kids. Well, that's nice, because he's been gone for six weeks in a row, and he's about to leave for another two months. So where are we going with that, Mauricio? Like, come on, you dick. And of course Mauricio is going to come up here and stand for the other terrible man on the show.
- [33:36]
A
Of course he will.
- [33:37]
B
Yeah. Team to read.
- [33:38]
A
Yeah.
- [33:38]
B
But I'm sure, like has sent texts being like, can I see the kids? Like, well, did you better do it on my time?
- [33:45]
D
He's like, well, I'll be there in six weeks.
- [33:47]
B
I better see them, because you're a terrible mother. So he's probably sending her text to get evidence.
- [33:52]
A
Yeah. And I. I feel like Mauricio, his role. First of all, if I were him, I would not have even agreed to do this. Honestly. Like. Like, it's not. You're gonna just always lose. It's just. Just stay out of it. Let the two of them deal with it. But I think his energy should have been more like, you know, PK has shown me texts that seem to indicate otherwise. So maybe you could show me and, like, we can sort of piece together where the gaps are, because I can be a third party. I can see how you guys are miscommunicating. But his was kind of like, no, you're crazy. PK does text you. PK does text you.
- [34:24]
C
He does.
- [34:24]
A
And that's, like, not helpful at all.
- [34:26]
B
Yeah, he's like, buddy sent them to me, showed me everything, you know.
- [34:29]
D
And she's like, look at me, Mo.
- [34:31]
B
And he's like, but okay, but then you haven't opened them then, because they're in your text. I promise you. Look at your text. She's, like, moving.
- [34:37]
D
Let me break out my text and see this proposal I've never seen. Oh, June 20th. Oh, still don't have a proposal. Where is that?
- [34:45]
B
And he's like, but I can only tell you what I've seen. And I've seen it. I've seen it myself. The Google sheet. I've seen the Google sheet.
- [34:53]
C
Gee. I know PK's tactics and his game, and he'll isolate texts and send them to people or show people when he's with them. Be like, look, look. But he omits the context. And it's very easy for PK to peddle a false narrative when I'm not around to defend myself. And this is the same old, same old M.O. same old.
- [35:13]
B
He's like, well, I think we're derailing the conversation into the wrong space. Okay, so let's go one thing. Let's attack one thing at a time. He's telling me he wants to see the kids, and you're telling me he wants to see the. You're telling me you want him to see the kids. So where are the kids?
- [35:27]
D
Well, they're covered in powdered sugar. You can't see them. They match the tablecloth. Jaggy's right there.
- [35:33]
B
I don't see him.
- [35:34]
D
You see.
- [35:39]
C
I want my children to see their father, but I don't want them to be scared. So until we find out where his head is, we cannot have the children see him in this state.
- [35:47]
D
I want them to see their father, but I also don't want them to realize that they've been talking to an uncooked croissant.
- [35:56]
A
So Mauricio is like, now he's like. He's taking off his jacket. His arms are crossed. So he sort of has more of a hostile stance.
- [36:03]
C
And she's like, well, go tell your friend and say, pk, what is the matter with you? Dorit has tried to sit down and speak to you. Tell him he's got a. He's got a thing about the kids, and I'm on his side. I'm actually on his side about this.
- [36:14]
A
Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay.
- [36:19]
B
But I'm not.
- [36:20]
D
I'm not keeping him from the kids.
- [36:22]
B
Okay, well, I know what's going on.
- [36:24]
D
With them, and I want to share. I want him to be involved. I need him to be involved. Did you know that Jiggy only asked for his grandfather? Now he doesn't even remember his father.
- [36:37]
B
Yeah.
- [36:37]
A
Love it. Great, great, great. Okay, cool. Okay, so I'm gonna go tell PK Dorit is crazy. Crazy Cocoa Puffs. Okay, got it, got it.
- [36:47]
D
But if he's going to be involved, he has to show up clear headed.
- [36:52]
B
He's like, oh, oh, oh. Well, he's 100 will do that. He's always clear headed.
- [36:56]
C
Mo.
- [36:57]
D
He started drinking again.
- [36:59]
B
He's like, well, you know, you've not been with him. He's not drinking every day. He's not over drinking. When we go to dinner, he orders a glass of wine, maybe eight, you know, we're not pounding it. That's not what he's doing.
- [37:10]
C
I'm not talking about wine. I'm talking about Bisquick. He's drinking Bisquick. He needs to stop right away.
- [37:18]
D
Well, but he didn't just quit drinking for a year as a casual thing, Mauricio. He stopped drinking because he needs just stop drinking.
- [37:27]
B
He's like, well, there's two sides to every story. You know, there's different perceptions. You know, some people can say the Alphabet backwards because they practice it. What are you gonna do?
- [37:38]
A
Sounds like you guys just need to talk. I'm like, yeah, that's the whole reason why you're here, is because he won't talk to Dorit. This is Mauricio being like, okay, this is getting. I can't do this anymore. Now you're accusing him of being a full blown alcoholic again.
- [37:52]
B
Yeah, exactly. So now we're moving on to his alcoholism now. I don't know. You know, I know that she's talking to him as a friend and being like, okay, well, you need to help him or whatever, but I don't know, there's just some things I don't think you can go to the friend to do. Like, make him stop drinking and tell him to show up sober too. I mean, Dorit really what she needs to do, you know, Dorit gets pissed because she thought that this was going to be a huge help. And of course, Mauricio is not even trying to hide that. He's kind of hostile here, right? He's like, I'm on PK side. You're nuts. I've seen all these text messages. You're trying to make him look like a bad dad, and that's his stance. And Dorit's like, well, okay, then remind him he's an alcoholic and if he wants to see his kids, it's just not the right way to do this. Dorit, you need to get a forensic accountant. Because she tells us again in this episode, she still has no idea how much money there is, where the money is, because PK keeps redacting everything. You need to get a forensic. He's got you. He's got you by the toes right now because of money. You need to. This is. You need to get a lawyer.
- [38:53]
A
This is crazy. So I don't like. This is. These are areas I don't know and I don't understand. I don't know why PK is allowed to have redacted elements of his financial records. I don't know why this is the way it is. But if there is a. If there is a professional that Dorit could be using to help her, she needs to get that professional in her life. I don't know if it's like, oh, if it's. I don't know, because there's all these different tiers of divorce mediation. And this is sealed and unsealed, like. And I'm learning it all from Bravo, you know? And so I don't know what realm her divorce is in, but what I do know is, like, I feel like she should be able to get those numbers about what money has and how much you file.
- [39:35]
B
Once you file, you're supposed to get a lawyer. They freeze all of that, and they do forensic for count. They do forensic accounting, and they get all that information. Yeah. He can't just redact it. I mean, who's his lawyer? Pam Bondi? You don't get to just redact the whole thing.
- [39:53]
A
This divorce is taking place in Culver City, so everyone watch out. Put on your bulletproof vests. Jesus. Yeah.
- [40:01]
B
This is crazy. She needs to. She needs to stop worrying about Mauricio or PK or visitation or all that shit, and she needs to get a fucking lawyer, and she needs to get a financial. Get a forensic account.
- [40:12]
A
This is such a waste of time to go. She should. Honestly, she shouldn't have really, I think, gone to Mauricio in the first place. I mean, I'm sure realistically, it was Bravo. Bravo's like, we need to have you guys have a scene. Mauricio should not be involved in. In between two people who are getting divorced. You do not want to get. Do. Put yourself in that position ever. I mean, even if it's just a breakup, just like a regular breakup, it's not even a divorce. You don't want to be in that position. But a divorce is, like. It gets messy. You just steer clear of all of that. And. Yeah, but it also feels like Dorit. Like this. This feels almost like a weird lateral move. You need to, in my own UN expert legal opinion, get a lawyer. Get someone who goes through the proper channels to deal with this, because going through Mauricio. Waste of time.
- [40:59]
B
Mauricio. Yeah. And it feels like. It feels like what she's trying to do is she's got Kyle, you know, kind of saying what PK is saying to Mauricio. So PK is getting his side out. Even not being on camera. He's. He's painting Dorit as being, like, crazy and holding the kids from him, right? And so she's like, well, that's not fair. So then I'll get the story out by. If Kyle's not going to support me and let me get the story out, then I'll have Mauricio over here, and I'll get the story out to Mauricio, and then that's how I'll kind of. But you can't do it through Mauricio, because Mauricio is not your friend. You know, he acted like your friend, but ultimately, it's the guys who were friends, never you guys.
- [41:36]
A
Yeah. What it also further confirms is that, like, Kyle obviously is getting her intel, either directly from PK or from Mauricio. I don't actually see a clip of it. Like, and this is not. That's not a shock. But it also goes to show that Kyle would rather take Mauricio's word over this whole situation than the words of her alleged friend. You know, and I think that's kind of shitty.
- [41:58]
B
Yeah. So we go to Sutton's house, and she has a new puppy, and she facetimes Porter to show her the port. The puppy, and it's Ozzy, her new dog. Okay.
- [42:09]
D
And I just. I need to talk to you.
- [42:11]
B
The Pope sent Ozzy a letter, and it was addressed to Ozzy Brown. Big deal.
- [42:20]
A
How do you feel about the fact that I got a dog and I named it a name that sort of sounds like Avi, but not quite. It's like, I don't care.
- [42:26]
C
Well, guess what?
- [42:27]
A
Also, the. The Pope wants me to be called Sutton Brown, not Sutton's track anymore. Do you have any feelings about that? She's like, I don't care, mother. I'm just trying to put in my order of Chipotle.
- [42:37]
B
She's like, I don't have to go buy Brown, do I?
- [42:41]
A
No. But I always thought I'd have the same last name as my daughter. She's like, mom, you're breaking up right now. Bye, Mom.
- [42:49]
B
Like Brown, like Charlie. Well, I've never really thought of it like that one. Mommy couldn't even kick a football. Well, really didn't think about it like that. Listen, I'm trying to have a storyline. I'm alone in the house. I got a dog that rhymes with Avi so I can finally have somebody in my life working for me that doesn't, you know, go against an NDA.
- [43:07]
D
So just please, please.
- [43:09]
B
Porter's like, you're stupid, and your time on the show is over.
- [43:12]
C
Okay?
- [43:13]
B
All you have to talk about is the last name that nobody cares about. Okay? The Pope doesn't even Want to talk about this, mother? Okay, the Pope has canceled. You get off this show.
- [43:22]
A
Fine, I'll bore America with it. Well, America, here I am, 50, changing my name. I never thought it would happen. You know, we. I'm an empty nester now. My baby birds have left. Literally. I had some baby birds. They just flew out the window. Cannot keep a window open. That's the real story with Avi, by the way. Left that window open. Lost my baby birds anyway. And to name that on top of that, now I'm just brown. You just call me Sutton K. Brown.
- [43:50]
B
Downtown Sutton Brown. That's how I'm known. Who am I? Where am I going? What's my identity? I mean, am I brown like Sutton? You need more. You need more. You need to get Avi over here and fight. Something needs to happen because this is. You're. You're fired.
- [44:07]
A
Okay, so we got a roaring downward spiral in her living room is the best. Who am I?
- [44:18]
B
Am I my resume? Well, am I brand? Who am I? So then we go to Dorit's house, and Dorit is packing for the hintoons.
- [44:28]
D
And she's like, oh, oh, this might be the start to an actual hot girl smile.
- [44:36]
C
Yes.
- [44:37]
A
And then she. And then she's really happy because she has her little mini Kelly Hermes bag that she's matching. We go to Kyle's house, and this. This was funny to me. So she's packing with. With Jen, her friend, and Kyle's like, yeah, this is gonna be a hot girl summer, Jen. And Jen goes, are we still saying hot girl summer? I thought that was, like, two summers ago. I was like, thank you for someone finally acknowledging this. This is what I've been thinking all season. I can't believe I didn't really articulate it on the show, but I was like, isn't hot girl summer kind of like, isn't that, like, passe? And then Kyle goes, yeah, but Rachel doesn't know that, and she keeps saying it, so I'm just going along with it. And I was like, wow, it's bad when even Kyle knows.
- [45:14]
B
Did Kyle know, though? Remember when Kyle was like, my eyebrows are on fleek?
- [45:19]
A
This hot girl summer's on fleek. Can't wait to be Audi 5000 to Beverly Hills.
- [45:26]
B
So Dana, Rachel's assistant, is pulling all of her kaftans out, and she's like, oh, my God. Love Dolce. Oh, my God, this is vintage poochie that I got at the vintage show. Do you remember? Oh, my God, Joanna Ortiz caftan. She is the Hampton. These all of these are classic Hamptons. And they're all the same caftan. It's just all the same caftan. Slightly different. Rachel can find a vintage caftan wherever she goes. It's a talent.
- [45:51]
A
Someone is banging at my door. Hold on one second. One second. There's someone from FedEx here. One second.
- [45:58]
B
J. Loose. Where am I?
- [46:30]
A
I'm so sorry about that. He was banging, and Dom wasn't here to open the door.
- [46:35]
B
Well, that's quite all right. In it.
- [46:37]
A
He wasn't leaving the package. I'm sorry. Sorry about that.
- [46:43]
B
So, yeah, vintage poochie, Joanna Ortiz caftan. Vintage Chloe dress. Priceless.
- [46:50]
A
I love. She is. I love how. Sorry. I love how surprised she is by all the items in her closet. Oh, my God. A Chloe dress. Oh, my God. Car lager. That was from, like, when Carloger film was like, oh, my God, Chanel. I love this Chanel. Oh, my God. There's the kaleidoscope from. From Sedona. Oh, my God.
- [47:10]
B
It's just the. Watching someone that excited to look like Mrs. Roper cracks me.
- [47:16]
A
Well, who wouldn't be? Honestly, It's really endearing. It's, like, very funny to me, but it's really endearing. This is someone who loves fashion on, like. Like, a deep, deep level that when she sees an item that she bought, like, she acts like someone just brought this to her. Like. Like she was at, like, a restaurant. And someone says, Ms. Zoe, special order for you. And then they bring out, like, a Chanel dress. But these are things that she already has acquired. But she's just so excited to, like, rediscover them again in her closet.
- [47:46]
B
Yeah. She's like, for me, I approached the Hamptons, like, I approached the south of France. Like, caftans, backless dresses, gold jewelry. You're not supposed to wear heels in the Hamptons. I don't care, because I'm me. I do whatever I want to. This is hot girl summer.
- [48:05]
A
Yeah. Because you know what? That's not me. Said me never. I don't know if I even understand that. It is me. So now we go to the LAX luxury terminal, the place where the celebrities, I guess, go. There's some sort of, like, satellite space. They. This is what's so funny. This is. Here's what's funny about celebrity culture. It's like, hey, you're so famous. You don't even have to go into the main terminal. We're gonna give you your own special little spot. And it's basically like. It looks like. Like Avis Rent a Car rental car. You know, it's like. It's this tiny little thing where they put out, like, a fruit platter, but because it's, like, far away from everyone else, it's like, ooh, the height of luxury.
- [48:50]
B
Sounds good to me.
- [48:51]
A
Ava's desk. Yeah. I mean, obviously, it's great.
- [48:54]
B
We were always trying to get into those airport lounges. We're like, oh, my God. Our dream when we're touring is to go to an airport lounge. So we got all the right credit cards, you know, like, it took us a while, but, like, we worked our way into those lounges, and then we finally get into the lounge, we're like, oh, it's just a shitty Hyatt place buffet. What the hell?
- [49:12]
A
But that's what's so funny. And look, don't get me wrong. If I can get ever access to that special little lax, you know, hobby hole of a receiving location, I will 100 go and be happy about it. But I just think it's so funny that, like, it's by and large, like, a very nothing burger. Little sitting space, right? Like, seating space. There's just some chairs, a little table, and they do bring out caviar and everything. But, like, it's not. I wouldn't look at that and be like, wow, this is so chic. But the fact that it's just, like, far away from everyone else, it's like, wow, this is the coolest spot in all of lax. It's a chair. It's like two chairs. Yeah. And some caviar.
- [49:50]
B
But you get to do things like pick up a landline and be like, hi, can we get some coffee and, like, some caviar?
- [49:57]
A
Yeah, thanks. You have landline.
- [49:59]
B
Throw the caviar in. I just want fish egg coffee. Just bring it to me. Dress it in a caftan. Go crazy.
- [50:07]
A
Yeah.
- [50:07]
C
Who said?
- [50:08]
A
Me Never.
- [50:09]
B
Yeah, here's what I don't want coffee dressed in a caftan. Said me never.
- [50:17]
A
Hot coffee. Summer. I noticed, by the way, when Kyle was packing, she has a big ass landline in her house. And I know I have to assume, like, okay, maybe for, like, security gates and everything like that, but this was like a full on 1994 office phone that was, like, wide. It was like, as wide as, like, a PS5. And I was like, what's happening with that giant ass phone in Kyle's bedroom?
- [50:40]
B
I wonder.
- [50:40]
A
No, I want to know if anyone else saw that and if they have any theories.
- [50:44]
B
And Kyle's like, oh, my God, I have to go on vacation with someone. I'M not even talking to. How's that going to work? Rachel's like, do you want a cappuccino? And dorit finally gets there, and now we're late. But, you know, it's pretty good for dorit.
- [50:59]
D
It's like, I've had two cappuccinis already. I just haven't slept. I haven't slept, let me tell you. PK had an emergency meditate mediation, and he agreed to take the kids while I'm in the hymn, Although he didn't pick them up until much later than we agreed upon. But you know what? It doesn't matter, because there's nothing that's going to take away the ability to have fun this weekend.
- [51:22]
A
I. I like how when dorit says, I've had two cappuccinos already, and Kyle goes, I'm on my third. Like, wow, you really are.
- [51:30]
B
You win. You win, Kyle. But they're all competing because Dorit's like.
- [51:34]
D
Well, I haven't slept, you guys.
- [51:35]
B
And Rachel's like, yeah, me neither. I slept an hour and a half. My God, we're just all beating you today. Sorry, emergency mediation. We both beat dorit.
- [51:45]
A
So, guys, I actually slept for, like, 88 minutes. So it's just, like, a little bit less time than, like, the 90 minutes. So, like, I don't know, maybe I'm, like, the most tired here. So now we cross cut with this luxury with to Amanda's house. And Amanda is setting up her table, and Eddie joins her.
- [52:03]
C
She's like, hi, Annie.
- [52:05]
A
Like, the way she says hello to her children. And Eddie drives me nuts.
- [52:09]
C
Hi, sweet thing.
- [52:11]
A
So she goes, so you remember how.
- [52:13]
C
You said dorit can't come to our.
- [52:14]
A
House and yell at a table of people in front of our kids? And that whole thing. Well, I found out that Kyle and dorit and rachel are in the Hamptons this weekend. And he's like, so worst case, we got booze.
- [52:25]
C
She's like, yeah, see, manifestation works. Dorit is 3,000 miles away from me.
- [52:31]
B
Now. 3,000 miles away in the Hamptons, Kyle and dorit and rachel are going to their destination. And Kyle's like, did amanda invite you guys to our manifestation thing? It's crazy.
- [52:42]
A
And which, by the way, it's really important for me to note this because I went back, I rewound for this exact moment in the recap, which is there was. Kyle asked Amanda when Amanda invited her. Kyle asked if she was inviting dorit. And Amanda was like, I don't know. I think maybe. I'm not sure. I have to think about it, blah, blah, blah. And so kyle knows that dorit's not invited. So the fact that she's sitting there and is like, like, so did everyone get invited to Amanda's thing? I'm like, what a. You're such a.
- [53:16]
B
You know.
- [53:17]
A
Dorit didn't get invited.
- [53:19]
B
Yes, I got invited. It's like, I said the same thing this. I said the same thing that I said to pants the last time they tried it. I declined.
- [53:29]
A
Oh, yeah. That's also the same thing that machines say to dorit's credit card.
- [53:35]
B
So she invited everyone.
- [53:38]
D
But that's me in spanish.
- [53:41]
B
Rachel's like, are you devastated? Are you devastated that you're missing the manifestation party? Wow.
- [53:48]
C
Not only am I not devastated, you don't give a.
- [53:50]
A
Let me just guess. That's the rest of the sentence.
- [53:52]
C
Yes, I'm done. I am done, and I am done. And she tells us, Amanda is 40 going on four. Do you think I'm bothered? Yeah, you actually did me a favor because I manifested not getting an invite.
- [54:05]
A
So think about that.
- [54:06]
C
The manif manifestation in reverse worked out. I manifested not getting invited before you manifested me not being there.
- [54:14]
D
So let's pretend that that joke just wasn't already made by amunda. Just keep it in the edit. Let's see who.
- [54:22]
B
Guys, I made a joke with manifestation jokes.
- [54:27]
A
Guys, I made the joke already. Sorry for interrupting you, like, 10 times today, Ronnie.
- [54:30]
B
Yeah, I made that joke, like, three times already. So now we go to Rachel's friend's house, and Rachel's like, oh, my God. I don't know that I needed, like, a leash for dorit. Like, is she gonna come in? Like, what the hell? I'm. So we meet Suzanne, Rachel's friend, and pamela, Rachel's sister, and Rachel comes into this house, which is kind of, you know, it's, like, nice, but it's like a basic Hamptons house. They all look the same. It's like the houses in beverly hills. They all kind of look the same. And she walks in, and she's like, oh, my God. This is my happy place. I'm happy here. I'm so happy. This is like, my God, it's like a normal foyer, but, like, in the Hamptons, Totally different.
- [55:12]
A
Literally. So happy being back with the cool girls. First of all, Pamela. I feel like Pamela's a throwback to the Rachel Zoe project because I was.
- [55:23]
C
Like, oh, my God.
- [55:23]
A
I remember Pamela. Second of all, I am gonna push back. I think these houses are much nicer than the Beverly hills houses. I think the Beverly hills houses are actually trying to. To copy sometimes the Hamptons look, but this is like, Hamptons. So if I had to choose between voyeurs, I'm choosing the Hamptons foyer for sure. Just want to draw a line on that one, Ronnie.
- [55:42]
B
That's okay. I think it looks like another, like, farmhouse modern remodel house. Rachel's like, oh, my God. You know what I just realized? Holy. Everybody stop. Foyers are different than the Hamptons. Okay, keep walking. Oh, my God, stop. I realized something else. We're all divorced, you guys. Like, we're literally all divorced right now. And Carl's like, actually, I. I'm separated, so don't call me divorce, please. Please don't call me divorce. And if I was divorced, I would be divorced much more peacefully than all of you, so I kind of would.
- [56:16]
A
Have the best divorce out of all of you guys. Like, no offense. Okay, well, all right. Well, we're all husbandless. Not together, you know, and do, like.
- [56:23]
C
But I filed, and you're the only one that didn't file, Kyle. Oh, that rhymes.
- [56:27]
A
I was like, okay, fine.
- [56:29]
B
I guess.
- [56:30]
A
I guess I'm the only one with, like, a really peaceful separation that doesn't require filing.
- [56:36]
B
Yeah, like, my sister, she's been divorced more than. She's, like, not been divorced. Like, she's been divorced so many years. I was like, do you even remember being married? She's like, you know what? I'm divorcing the idea that I was ever married. I was like, holy. You're like, double divorce now. It's crazy. She wins.
- [56:51]
A
Yeah. Oh, my God. Remember Pamela? Do you know what we were doing this time last year? Do you remember this, Pamela? She's like, I think we were ordering takeout. No, no, she was taking out ofan from my mother, by the way, adavan. I also call it what dorit's doing because she always hangs out at a van. Am I right, guys? Anyway, she was taking out of hand.
- [57:10]
B
That's dorit's future address. Hey, you guys, where does dorit left? At a van.
- [57:17]
A
Down by the river. So she was taking alivan from my mother, breaking it in half, and trying to put it in my mouth because I couldn't breathe. I was like, I'm sorry. I just visioned of, like, Rachel being like. Like, like a little puppy or a cat, like, being fed, like, medication. Like, oh, do not make me put.
- [57:34]
B
This in a little vienna sausage and shove it down your throat.
- [57:37]
C
Okay?
- [57:38]
A
I can't open my mouth.
- [57:39]
B
I can't.
- [57:39]
A
I can't.
- [57:39]
B
I can't literally. I can't. I'm too devastated.
- [57:42]
A
I love medication said me never. I can't.
- [57:48]
B
And Pamela goes, oh, yeah, and where's he now, huh? She's living his best fucking life. That's where he's where he is. So she says that it got really bad for her in the summer of 2024. And my sister called me and said, you have to do something different either way because the way you're living right now isn't working. I just suggest taking whatever you're doing and changing it. Do the opposite, but also still work aftans because, like, what are you, a monster? So I did it.
- [58:19]
A
I remember getting to the Hamptons breathing. And I think in that moment, I was, like, trying to feel what it was like to be alone. And I knew, like, almost instantly that that was better. It was actually literally better to sit there breathing in the toxic fumes of the Hampton Jitney exhaust pipe than it was to be with Raj any longer. Yeah.
- [58:40]
B
Congratulations. You've reached the end of part one of a two part recap for part two. Go look for the recap that says part two. See you over there, suckers.
- [58:51]
A
Watch what Krappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. It's always a party on Alison Block.
- [58:59]
B
Our way is the Amber way.
- [59:01]
A
It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Auto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap.
- [59:09]
B
Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. We never miss her call. It's Diane Call. Sunday in the park with Dylan Clark. Big yay. It's Emily Gautier.
- [59:18]
A
Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no Tricholas Hava Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Jamie. She has no last name.
- [59:30]
B
Amy sipped some scotch with Jessica Trotch.
- [59:33]
A
She's not a McBee. She's a McBride. Jess McBride. She's our favorite streamer.
- [59:38]
B
Caroline Peacock, Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B. Que sera sera. Whatever will be will. Lauren Silsby. She gets a name from us. It's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisalino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry.
- [59:56]
A
Aren't you glad It's Marianne Ahrens.
- [59:58]
B
Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the burg.
- [60:01]
A
This is living with Michelle. Vivian.
- [60:04]
B
I love a Ya. Olivia Williamson.
- [60:06]
A
She sure is swell It's Raquel.
- [60:09]
B
Yes, we can. It's Savannah.
- [60:11]
A
Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.
- [60:15]
B
Darn skippy. It's Tippy. And our super premium sponsors.
- [60:20]
A
Make way for age J. Lopez.
- [60:22]
B
She's VVIP it's Amanda V. Somebody get.
- [60:25]
A
Us 10 cc's of Betsy MD we're.
- [60:28]
B
Taking the gold with Brenda Silva.
- [60:30]
A
Let's get real with Caitlin o'.
- [60:32]
C
Neal.
- [60:32]
B
Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses. It's Christine Hogle. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides.
- [60:43]
A
Who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland.
- [60:46]
B
Let's go in. Into the woods with Guy Tubbs.
- [60:48]
A
Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish. My favorite Murdo. Karen McMurdo.
- [60:55]
B
She's a total knockout. It's Katie Manock.
- [60:58]
A
Let's get Savage With Laura Wildman in the study with a candlestick. It's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Rider Baron. She's a whiz. It's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it. It's Lola Al Kalani. Roger that. It's Marla's Rob Rogers.
- [61:13]
B
The incredible edible Matthew sisters. She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose. There's a chance of meatballs. It's Rebecca Cloud.
- [61:21]
A
Maximum love for Sandy Maximoska. She's the queen bee. It's Sarah Lemke.
- [61:26]
B
We cannot tell a lie. It's Sarah.
- [61:28]
A
Tell of son Shannon out of a can. And Anthony. Please don't stop at solely and pop. Let's take off with Tamla. Plane strike. Oppose.
- [61:37]
B
It's torture Rose. She ain't no shrinking violet Coutar. We love you guys.
- [61:48]
E
This is Paige Desorbo from Giggly Squad. Boost Mobile gives you the same network coverage, speed and service you're used to, just at a more affordable price. Why pay more if you don't have to? Offering reliable nationwide coverage backed by a 30 day money back guarantee. Love your service or get your money back, no questions asked. Visit your nearest Boost Mobile store or head to boostmobile.com to learn more. After 30GB, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers who cancel within 30 days of activation will have boost service fees refunded, activation fees if applicable, and phone payments will not be refunded.