#3234 Vanderpump Rules S12E12: Pride and Hedge a Diss - Watch What Crappens

Transcript

A (0:00)

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B (0:55)

Guess what happens when there's no Watch what cr. Watch what happens. Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens.

C (1:08)

Well, hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens. I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there. Hello, Ben.

B (1:15)

Hi, Ronnie. How are you?

C (1:17)

Good. What's going on with you?

B (1:20)

You know, just getting ready for the crappies final stretch. Very exciting. What's going on with you?

C (1:24)

Golden Crappies February 27, this Friday in Hollywood at the Fonda Theater. Get tickets@watchwhatcrappens.com that's also where you find live streaming. Go get them. If you want this episode ad free or you want to watch it on video or you want our newsletter or you want our traders bonus episodes, that is all Patreon stuff, go to patreon.com watch what crappens for all of that good stuff. And today is the season finale of vanderpoop truls Season 12 Episode 12 Cold Pride and Joy.

B (2:00)

That's right. Good classic Vanderpump rules pride episode full with full of all the petty squabbles you could ever want. And it starts with a brunch shift at sir. And we see Chris walking in into the bathroom and everything and he's like, ugh, time to suck today's dick. Which I mean what a great way to start off the episode

C (2:23)

and pretty believably too. Yeah, like I bought it. I bought it. I love a for rent boy as the new cast, the new Casting structure on this show. I love it. I will say I didn't think this was a very classic Vanderpump Rules Pride episode. It was like, kind of a How Far We've Fallen Pride episode. I mean, there was nobody there. I think there were 10 people there. They kept, like, grouping everybody in the restaurant together to try and make it look like a lot of people. And then you would see in the background that nobody was there. And. And then all the decorations were like, party City, Gay Pride, cardboard cutout things. I mean, they even had one with words that spelled like, wow, gay pride, motherfuckers. Or something. Like, you know those things that say happy birthday that you string up for, like, the least effort for somebody's birthday. It was sad.

Summary

Watch What Crappens — Episode #3234 Vanderpump Rules S12E12: Pride and Hedge a Diss
Release Date: February 25, 2026
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam

Episode Overview

This episode covers the season 12 finale of Vanderpump Rules, titled "Pride and Hedge a Diss." Ben and Ronnie dissect the show's annual Pride episode, recounting the drunken brunches, interpersonal rifts, poorly-attended parties, and clumsy emotional maneuvers that define the series. With the flair and biting wit devoted Crappens fans expect, the hosts shine a light on how far this cast — and the once-glamorous SIR — have fallen, all against a backdrop of rubber duckies, bad bikini choices, party city decorations, sexual tension, and messy relationship drama.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Sad State of SIR’s Pride (02:00–05:34)

The hosts open by lamenting how lackluster this "classic" Pride episode feels, due to SIR’s dwindling attendance and “Party City” level decorations.
- “There was nobody there. I think there were 10 people there. They kept, like, grouping everybody in the restaurant together to try and make it look like a lot of people.” (Ronnie, 02:23)
- “SIR is specifically just sadder, you know?” (Ben, 03:13)
Criticism of the decor: rubber duckies, cardboard cutouts, and “wow, gay pride, motherfuckers” banners that feel like minimal effort.
The hosts comment on how the appeal of Lisa Vanderpump and SIR is diminished: what was once an iconic destination now feels “just sad.”

2. Confused Party Planning and Drink Naming (04:08–11:12)

Venus and Marcus discuss lackluster Pride prep: rubber duckies are debated as inappropriate for Pride (04:08–05:34).
- “It’s really like straight people doing gay pride type stuff…But, like, you’re a gay and you’re put in charge. It’s worse. I think it’s the worst one we’ve had.” (Ronnie, 04:44)
The cast fumbles naming Pride cocktails: “Aquamarine,” “Blue Balls,” “Butt Slut” are all bandied about (07:55–08:58).
- “Marcus says, my true belief is that there’s no one in the world that’s just 100% totally straight. I mean, except for Kimberly…for me personally, I’m, like, at least 10% gay.” (Ronnie, 08:38)
- “This drink needs to scream cock and balls.” (Ronnie imitating Marcus, 08:38)
The banter around missing the mark on “gay enough” names is classic Crappens sarcasm.

3. Apartment Glow-Ups & Comedy Fights (12:42–16:41)

Angelica gives Kim and Demi a tour of her new apartment and new life (12:42–14:15).
- “You have a new cat too…What did you do that you just got this much money?” (Ben, 13:11)
Angelica feels personally attacked by Audrey’s standup routine and the hosts support her read—“she was just airing out dirty laundry in front of strangers, and it was obnoxious.” (Ben, 15:14ff)
Group consensus: Audrey crossed a line and no one stood up for Angelica, underlining the show’s mean streak.

4. Relationship Sabotage, Commitment-phobia, and “Tulip Time” (16:41–25:48)

Chris’s “romantic” gestures (boiled chicken, plastic Trader Joe’s tulips) come under fire.
- “If a guy who worked out gave me a salad, I would be like, gross. But then if he gave me bread, I would be like, this man wants to marry me.” (Ronnie, 19:49)
Chris admits he doesn’t know Audrey’s favorite flower (a stargazer lily tattooed on her arm).
The salad dinner turns into a relationship nonversation:
- “He just basically is sounding like AI Slop. It’s just like, a whole bunch of, like, buzzwords and phrases that's actually saying nothing at all right now.” (Ben, 22:47)
Audrey and Chris’s open/undefined relationship is mercilessly critiqued.
- “He is making no sense. The moment he says, ‘I want to protect your feelings’ is the moment he's saying, ‘I want to bang other people, and I don't want you to get upset.’” (Ben, 24:13)
- “You somehow are saying too much and nothing at all at the same time.” (Ben, 25:32)

5. Bro Talk: Women as Addiction/Validation (28:01–34:21)

Marcus and Shane shop for DJ gear and have a bro-down about why committing to one woman is considered terrifying.
Shane muses: “I’ve used women very similarly to the way I’ve used drugs. Have you ever tried to snort a woman? It’s crazy, man.” (Ben as Shane, 30:30)
Ronnie playfully mocks their macho validation crises: “The middle path is, like, finding a super special one girl and then you just cheat on her a lot.” (Ronnie, 30:54)

6. Pride Day Arrives: Chintzy Decor, Speeches & Fizzling Drama (38:23–47:29)

The sparse and underwhelming Pride event is described: “Everyone’s dancing around, 10 people come, and Shane comes in.” (Ronnie, 46:35)
More shade for cheap rubber duckies and floaties.
Lisa Vanderpump’s “My Little Pony gay savior story” is the peak of her involvement—she recounts buying My Little Pony toys for her nephew. (45:47–46:18)
- “Maybe I can’t buy every little kid My Little Pony, but I can throw a great party in their honor.” (Lisa, paraphrased by Ronnie, 46:18)

7. Relationship Finales and Confrontations (52:40–59:38)

Audrey tries to dump Chris for good at Pride, expressing frustration at his emotional double talk.
- “You gave me vaseless flowers, a chicken breast, a long drive, and this is on the heels of you begging for me back. So, no, I don’t want to be even an option anymore for you.” (Ben, 54:24)
The hosts mock how both parties try to claim moral high ground and how Audrey’s attempt at a dignified breakup is undercut by their setting (“trying to save dignity in the worst bathing suit in the world, working the chintziest Gay Pride party in the world out front of SIR.”) (Ronnie, 59:38)

8. Comedy Roast Fallout: Angelica vs. Audrey (62:53–67:27)

Angelica confronts Audrey about the pain of being roasted on stage.
- “You talked about my traumas. I have a great credit score, okay?” (Angelica, 64:40)
Audrey stands by her “it’s just comedy” defense; group members take sides.
“Audrey, you talked about my traumas. I have a great credit score, okay? And I don’t live with my ex anymore.” (Ronnie as Angelica, 64:40)

9. Final Thoughts / Mock Reunion Teaser (69:09–end)

The group dances awkwardly at the end—in chintzy Pride outfits, to celebrate a season of chaos.
Ronnie and Ben tease the forthcoming reunion and share mutual excitement.

Memorable Quotes & Moments

“This drink needs to scream cock and balls.” — Marcus (Ronnie impersonation), 08:38
“It’s like she thinks if she keeps arguing with him, he's gonna give her a different answer. But this guy is a boy. He's not going. Stop. Stop even having the conversation. Walk away.” — Ronnie, 58:13
“I’ve used women very similarly to the way I’ve used drugs. Have you ever tried to snort a woman? It’s crazy, man.” — Shane (Ben impersonation), 30:30
“You talked about my traumas. I have a great credit score, okay?” — Angelica (Ronnie as Angelica), 64:40
“You somehow are saying too much and nothing at all at the same time.” — Ben (about Chris), 25:32

Timestamps for Key Segments

[02:00] — Critique of SIR’s Pride event: decor, attendance, atmosphere
[04:08] — Rubber ducky debate and the failure of Pride party planning
[07:55] — Naming Pride cocktails and “gay enough” banter
[12:42] — Angelica’s apartment and confrontation fallout from Audrey’s roast
[16:41] — Chris & Audrey’s relationship talk (“AI Slop” dialogue)
[28:01] — Marcus and Shane’s “addicted to women/validation” shop chat
[38:23] — Pride Day kicks off (Lisa’s “My Little Pony” anecdote at 45:47)
[52:40] — Audrey and Chris’s public breakup at Pride
[62:53] — Angelica/Audrey confrontation over the comedy roast

Tone & Language

Ben and Ronnie maintain their signature sardonic, riff-heavy style. The recap is rich with sarcasm, Bravo in-jokes, tangential bits (e.g., flower symbolism, bread cravings, and Lisa’s “gay nephew” story), and pointed character reads. Despite mocking the cast and Bravo’s production values, there’s an undercurrent of genuine affection and detailed fandom.

For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This episode pokes fun at Vanderpump Rules’ attempt at a Pride celebration—framing it as both a metaphor for the show’s faded glory and an incubator for messy, unresolved cast drama. The hosts helpfully break down every relationship convolution, roast, and bad event-planning decision, with plenty of graphic, meme-worthy quotes. If you want a smart, cynical, yet loving debrief of both the show and its reality TV ecosystem, this episode is a must-listen—especially with the two-part reunion on the horizon.