#3263 THE 2026 GOLDEN CRAPPIES PART TWO

Summary

Watch What Crappens #3263 — THE 2026 GOLDEN CRAPPIES PART TWO

Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Date: March 15, 2026

---

Episode Overview

This lively episode delivers Part Two of the "2026 Golden Crappies"—an annual, irreverent, and affection-filled awards show lampooning the greatest (and most ridiculous) Bravo moments, personalities, and scandals of the year. Ben and Ronnie, alongside an ensemble of special guests, celebrate, roast, and dramatize everything from Real Housewives to Below Deck and beyond. The episode is crammed with sketch comedy bits, panel debates, fake acceptance speeches, and fan-voted awards, all in the duo’s signature campy, sassy style.

---

Key Segments & Highlights

Below Deck Celebration ft. Chef Serena

[01:19–07:18]

• Category: "Most Below Deck Moment"
• Guests: Chef Serena from Below Deck
• Insider Yachting Tea: Serena talks about Alicia, stressing that “she works really well with kindness, and if you’re gonna put pressure on her and be… Yeah, she gets frazzled. You’re not gonna be able to do it.” (03:44, Serena)
• Craziest Boat Hookups: Serena admits, “In a bed. Missionary.” (06:19, 06:22)
• Contestants: Drunk guest rants, bathroom sexcapades, “poop shower” (waffle stomp).
  • Serena deadpans: “People just poop in the shower...They really, really do. I think they just think we have money, we can do what we like.” (06:57, Serena)
• Winner: The “poop shower/waffle stomp” moment.

---

Best Show Nominee—Real Housewives of Miami

[08:05–10:17]

• Dramatic Skit: The hosts parody Miami’s party and narcissist drama, riffing on Larsa, Todd, Adriana, Kiki, etc.
  • “Like, this party is about Todd, you dingalings.” (08:32, Ben)
  • “I called her a ratchet. Like the tool.” (09:53, Ronnie)
• Miami’s Status: Hosts defend the franchise; “Don’t you try it. If you cancel that show I’m warning you right now.” (10:36, Ronnie)

---

Bravo’s Legal Troubles & Best DJ Debate

[10:50–16:08]

• Guest: Sassy Alvarez (Bravo Docket)
• Legal Hot Topics: Wendy’s arrest, Erika Jayne’s lawsuits.
  • “She’s guilty as shit, guys.” (11:52, Serena [as Sassy])
  • “Keep chanting plane crash victims.” (12:53, Serena [as Sassy])
• Best DJ Award:
  • Nominees include Maddi Reese (Southern Hospitality), Dorinda Medley, Meredith Marks, Randy the Butler, Riley Burris.
  • Meredith wins for her blazer-wearing, low-energy charisma.
  • “I’m going to go for Meredith just because I really like Meredith and I think she had a shitty year…” (15:28, Ronnie)
  • Meredith Marks wins.

---

Most Iconic Bravo Fights

[17:54–23:48]

• Presenter: Rachel Lindsay (Morally Corrupt Podcast)
• Favorite Seasons: Miami praised, Potomac finale debated; Miami’s “Haitian mortician fight” gets love.
• Nominees: Adriana & Marisol’s yacht argument (RHOM), Cash confronting Emmy (Southern Hospitality), Cole v. Hill (McBee Dynasty), Salt Lake’s garden party fight, NYC speaker drama, and more.
• Winner: Haitian mortician fight, RHOM:
  • “You’re never gonna hear those words again in a sentence.” (23:00, Serena [as Rachel])

---

Skits & Parody: Married to Medicine, Real Housewives of London & More

[24:24–33:00]

• Parody Skits: Ben & Ronnie perform scenes with recurring bits (“He made a smoothie out of it. I demand respect.” (26:22, Serena)), poke fun at “campaign” antics, and dramatize show moments.
• Best Travel Drama:
  • Nominees: Kristen Doute’s boat chaos, Lisa Hochstein’s Miami lateness, Meredith’s emotional flight (SLC), Potomac’s airport race.
  • “Those were three of the best episodes of reality TV I have ever seen.” (30:23, Serena [as Elizabeth Day] re: Potomac, but ultimately picks the Meredith plane crying incident)
  • Winner: Meredith Marks’ “unconfirmed emotional reaction” on a flight.

---

Ceremony “Superlatives” & Quirky Awards

[33:44–34:54]

• Throwaway awards for odd Bravo “achievements,” e.g. Adam’s tabbouleh as best-tasting personality substitute; Reba (RHOBH) as most terrifying mom with a psychiatry degree, etc.

---

Best Scandal

[34:57–42:05]

• Presenter: Katie Janela (RHOC)
• Dish on taco contracts and being fired: “When I was fired, they called and said that I didn’t fit in. And aside from Tamara, you’re right—I don’t. Because I have taste.” (37:19, Serena [as Katie])
• Nominees: Adriana/Julia sleeping together, Galena’s chaos (McBee Dynasty), Georgia’s unwashed hands (Next Gen NYC), Gretchen Rossi’s MAGA post, Wendy & Eddie fraud (RHOP).
• Winner: Wendy and Eddie arrested for fraud (RHOP)

---

Comedy Interlude: Aging Bravo Stars Song (“Old Roni Club”)

[45:19–48:25]

• Parody Song—Ben, as Ramona, processes getting the call to go back to Bravo, lampooning Roni and nostalgia for “old-school” housewives life.

---

Biggest Villain

[48:47–56:02]

• Presenter: Diallo Riddle
• Debate over villain types:
  • “Maybe next year we’ll separate out the villains versus the pieces of shit…”
• Nominees: Aaron (Denise Richards), Colton (Traitors), Janet (The Valley), Jax Taylor, the front door (Summer House).
• Winner: Jax Taylor—“The biggest asshole. But it’s also been—he’s a person that we’ve been waiting to see go down for years.” (55:22, Ronnie)

---

Best Non-Housewives Show

[59:37–64:18]

• Presenter: Ryan Bailey
• Nominees: Next Gen NYC, Southern Hospitality, Summer House, The Traitors, The Valley
• Ben’s Pick: “I could watch them make chicken salad and I would just be in love.” (62:51, Ben re: Summer House)
• Ronnie’s Pick: The Valley; nervous for Season 3; excited for Brittany’s new start.
• Winner: The Traitors

---

Best Bravo Moment

[64:38–69:10]

• Presenters: Courtney & Mary (Two Judgy Girls)
• **Favorite Bravocon moments, Gorga anecdotes, and Lisa Hochstein selfie thefts.
• Nominees: Adriana’s “Haitian mortician” accusation (RHOM), Jax’s double-firing/reunion drama (The Valley), Paige dumps Craig (Summer House), Doll Song phone call (Traitors), and more.
• Winner: Adriana accuses Julia of sleeping with a Haitian mortician.
  • “Where’s the sponsorship? Seriously, Where’s Nespresso? Where is Mr. Coffee or funeral homes?” (69:17, Ronnie)

---

In Memoriam: Tribute to Departed Bravo Personalities

[69:49–74:51]

• Musical moment: Jennifer Tilly sings "Wind Beneath My Wings."
• Heartfelt tribute to Bravo cast members lost or departed, including special nod to Robert Cosby Jr.:
  • “We didn’t want to add this into a jokey thing, but obviously we’re heartbroken about Robert Cosby Jr. So sending all of our love to you, Mary Cosby.” (74:39, Ronnie)

---

Bravo Liberty of the Year

[75:06–82:19]

• Presenter: Ariana Madix (Love Island USA)
• Nominees: Gabby (Traitors), Jennifer Tilly (RHOBH), Kristen Doute (The Valley), Paige Desorbo (Summer House), Rob Roush, Stacy Rush (Potomac), Zach Wickham (The Valley)
• Winner: Stacy Rush (Potomac)
• Style: Ariana, beloved former guest and now a star herself, does awards with heartfelt and humorous grace.

---

Best Bravo Show of the Year

[86:26–87:02]

• Finalists: Married to Medicine, Next Gen NYC, Real Housewives of Miami, Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Summer House, The Valley
• Winner: Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
• Celebratory closeout: “Thank you so much for being here. It’s been an amazing year. We look forward to seeing you in 2027.” (87:02, Ronnie)

---

Notable Quotes & Iconic Moments

• “People just poop in the shower...They really, really do. I think they just think we have money, we can do what we like.” – Serena [Below Deck] (06:57)
• “Like, this party is about Todd, you dingalings.” – Ben (08:32)
• “She’s guilty as shit, guys.” – Serena [as Bravo Docket’s Sassy] (11:52)
• “You’re never gonna hear those words again in a sentence.” – Serena [as Rachel Lindsay], on “Haitian mortician fight” (23:00)
• “I went out on top. My kids are amazing. My husband and I love each other, and the fans have been so nice.” – Serena [as Katie Janela] (39:51)
• “We shouldn’t have to have an abusive piece of shit category, but we probably need one after this year.” – Ronnie (51:45)
• “I could watch them make chicken salad and I would just be in love.” – Ben, on Summer House (62:51)
• “You bring us so much joy. You make us feel seen… What you do, you make it seem effortless and it’s so hilarious and joyous, but I can only imagine the amount of work it actually takes.” – Serena [as Elizabeth Day], presenting a special thanks to Ben & Ronnie (31:12)

---

Structure & Flow

• The episode balances sketch comedy, panel banter, and real-life Bravo analysis.
• Awards are delivered via parodies, with both sincerity and camp.
• Each category is introduced by a notable guest (often Bravo-connected), and nominees are given colorful, humorous context.
• Memorable quotes and standout conversations are seamlessly woven with satirical skits and musical numbers.

---

Timestamps for Major Segments

• [01:19] Below Deck awards & Serena's appearance
• [08:05] Real Housewives of Miami skit & defense
• [10:50] Bravo Docket’s Sassy Alvarez & DJ category
• [17:54] Best Fight, Rachel Lindsay guest
• [24:24] Married to Medicine/Real Housewives of London skits, Best Travel Drama
• [34:57] Katie Janela presents Best Scandal
• [45:19] “Old Rony Club” parody song
• [48:47] Diallo Riddle & Biggest Villain Award
• [59:37] Non-Housewives Show (with Ryan Bailey)
• [64:38] Two Judgy Girls & Most Memorable Bravo Moment
• [69:49] Jennifer Tilly In Memoriam
• [75:06] Ariana Madix presents Bravo Liberty of the Year
• [86:26] Best Bravo Show of the Year announced

---

Tone & Language

• Warm, irreverent, and self-aware with heavy use of sarcasm and affectionate mockery.
• Frequent in-jokes and callbacks, both to Bravo’s content and the podcast’s own lore.
• Hosts and guests play up absurdity but remain endearing and supportive of the community.

---

Closing

The 2026 Golden Crappies is a rollicking love letter to Bravo fandom—affectionately skewering its absurdities, rewarding fan favorites, and creating a tight-knit, hilarious community space. The night’s biggest honors go to Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and Stacy Rush, but the entire event serves as a lively Oscars-for-Bravo with plenty of shade, laughter, heartfelt moments, and reality TV drama.

Transcript

[Ben]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the name your price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try [e-mail], progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law. Not available in all states.

[Ronnie]

Mom, dad, I just have to say

[Serena]

it breaks my heart watching you stress over dinner every night. This year I don't want you doing the fridge. Staredown hot take. With the new Blue Apron, eating healthy is easy. They've got pre made and one pan meals. Plenty of balanced nutrition, no subscription needed. You could be plating like a chef

[Ronnie]

instead of negotiating with leftovers.

[Serena]

Make it your healthy, tasty and easy 2026 dinner resolution.

[Ronnie]

Just saying.

[Serena]

Get $50 off your first two orders plus free shipping with code STIR50. Terms and conditions apply. Visit blue apron.com terms for more.

[Ben]

Watch what happens. Watch what crap is. Who cares what happens when there's so much. Hello and welcome to watch what happens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. This is part two.

[Ronnie]

Okay, now our next category. Ben. It's a show we love.

[Ben]

We love this. It's time to celebrate all things below deck. And here to help us do that. Chefs arena.

[Ronnie]

Yes, Yes, madame. Love it. Whichever you want me to hold your bag here, I'll put it on this.

[Ben]

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

[Serena]

Thank you for having me.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God. Love seeing you here. Yes. Serena, I feel like this is the

[Serena]

only below deck category.

[Ronnie]

Well, it kind of is because below deck can take over. You know, we gotta, like, relegate you guys to your own category.

[Serena]

Yeah, sometimes I didn't know why so many people liked it.

[Ronnie]

Oh, yeah, people love Below Deck.

[Ben]

Below Deck is huge. The other thing is that sometimes Real Housewives steals the spotlight. Below Deck is a behemoth in its own right and it deserves a spotlight on this show and many other places.

[Ronnie]

It's the highest rated show on Bravo and it's also the bridge in so many marriages.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

To Bravo. The husbands are like, I'm not watching this bullshit anymore. And then they put on Below Deck. They're like, okay, I'm here.

[Ben]

I can't tell you how many times I've encountered people. They're like, oh, you do a Bravo podcast? Like, yeah. Oh, I don't watch that. No, I mean, I do watch that yacht show and then I know every single detail of every single Below Deck.

[Serena]

I had it the other day. I went into an art studio and this man was like, I got my wife into below deck. And I've never heard that before.

[Ronnie]

It's like he's talking about, like, fuz fuzzies, you know, I got my wife into it. It's below deck. You don't have to be ashamed. So tell me, are you watching the Current season?

[Serena]

I'm actually not. I've been really busy, but I think I might start watching.

[Ronnie]

You have to, because it's the. It's the second chapter of Alicia.

[Serena]

I know. And I. I've heard. At least she was calling me, and

[Ben]

I was like, oh, girl, I'm so sorry. You got Ben.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God.

[Ben]

I. I have a question. I have a question. I feel like when Alicia was working under you, she seemed like a pretty all right sous chef. She was able to cut vegetables and put things in things. And this season, like, something happened to her. She was, like, doing crazy stuff in the kitchen. What do you know? Like, did something happen to poor Alicia?

[Serena]

She works really well with kindness, and if you're gonna put pressure on her and be.

[Ben]

Yeah, she gets frazzled, you're not gonna

[Serena]

be able to do it.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, yeah. You're supportive, right? Yeah. Well, I mean, I don't work well with kindness, but I know that people do. Like, you know, I get it. Like, I don't drink gas, but cars do, so I support it still. So there's a rumor on Reddit, actually, that Alicia is not even Alicia, that she's actually her twin sister on this

[Serena]

one, and that's why they don't look that much alike. And I'll tell you something, Alicia's twin sister's even crazier.

[Ronnie]

All right, so that's out. So how have you been doing since. Since the show?

[Serena]

I've been resting.

[Ronnie]

Have you? Right on.

[Serena]

Yeah, I took a little bit of a break from the otting industry, and I'm actually really, really loving it.

[Ben]

Really? What are you doing instead? Aside from resting?

[Serena]

I basically turned into a Jewish housewife.

[Ben]

Oh, I love that. I love that member of my tribe.

[Serena]

Just been cooking three meals a day. I got a kitten. I actually have a life.

[Ronnie]

Nice.

[Ben]

Love it.

[Ronnie]

It's crazy. Well, don't.

[Serena]

It's been really, really nice.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God.

[Ben]

You deserve it. You deserve it.

[Ronnie]

Serena breaks down. All right, well, taking a break. Okay, so let's go through these below deck moments. Most below deck moment with Serena.

[Serena]

I'm not wearing my glasses. You didn't warn me about this.

[Ronnie]

Oh, okay, well, here, I'll tell you, and then you tell me if you have Opinions. Okay, okay. So the first one, Drunk lady screams at Democrats before Captain Kerry traps her in a room below deck.

[Ben]

That's a picture of me this morning.

[Serena]

I feel like an all inclusive hotel.

[Ben]

I would be exactly the same.

[Ronnie]

Joe makes out with Kizzy while V is sick and alone on her birthday, which is also the one year anniversary of her boyfriend's death. Below deck. Men.

[Ben]

That was bad. That was bad.

[Ronnie]

Kyle has sex with a stranger on the floor of a bathroom stall. Below deck.

[Serena]

Well, I'll tell you something. There's not many places to get down and dirty on a boat. And there's been some very imaginary places that people do it. And I actually think on my season, Colver and Jamie, who went into the dirty bilge, was probably the worst.

[Ben]

Oh, I forgot about that.

[Ronnie]

Where's the craziest place you've had sex on the show?

[Serena]

On the show.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Have you not?

[Ben]

No.

[Serena]

In a bed.

[Ronnie]

You're like me. I'm crazy. You want to have sex in the bed?

[Serena]

Missionary.

[Ben]

Next nominee is Max pets a jellyfish, then touches his eye. Below deck Med. And then this is a. This is one I think none of us will ever forget. The poop shower from below deck Med.

[Ronnie]

Waffle stomp.

[Serena]

I'll tell you something, though, that happens in normal yachting all the time.

[Ben]

Does it really?

[Serena]

It shouldn't happen that much, but it does.

[Ronnie]

Really? People just poop in the shower.

[Serena]

They really, really do. I think they just think we have money, we can do what we like.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Wow. All right, so what would you pick out of these?

[Serena]

I think poop in the shower is probably the worst.

[Ronnie]

Poop in the shower.

[Ben]

Yeah, that was mine. The poop shower. The waffle stomp. That, to me, that stayed with me. That's my. That was the most below deck moment for me.

[Ronnie]

All right, the winner of most below deck moment.

[Serena]

Drunk lady screams.

[Ronnie]

Yes. Drunk lady screams at demons. Democrats. Democrats. Chef Serena.

[Ben]

We love you, Chef Serena.

[Ronnie]

Gorgeous. Probably look at my paper here. Okay. And now we'd like to present the third nominee for best show on Bravo. Best show of the year.

[Ben]

Real Housewives of Miami. Which if Bravo knows what they're doing, they'll bring back to us very soon.

[Ronnie]

Yes.

[Ben]

Welcome to my narcissist party.

[Ronnie]

Finally. So much like throwing a party.

[Ben]

Like, I understand, like, this party is not about you, Larsa. You're such a narcissist.

[Ronnie]

See, this party is, like, about me.

[Ben]

Like, this party is about Todd, you ding a lings.

[Ronnie]

But, like, when is there gonna be a party for me?

[Ben]

Like, this is very Narcissistic, Larsa. Very, very narcissistic.

[Ronnie]

Are you guys confusing me on purpose? Like, why does everyone keep calling me that and saying it's not my party life?

[Ben]

Oh, well, you know, like, Todd is a narcissist, and he broke up with me and never let me talk to him again, ever.

[Ronnie]

All right, ladies, let's throw a trip so Alexia can forget Todd.

[Ben]

Wait, can Todd come?

[Ronnie]

No, that's the point of the trip. It's supposed to be.

[Ben]

But I love him. I love Todd.

[Ronnie]

He's a narcissist.

[Ben]

How dare you call Todd a narcissist at his own narcissist party. I'm Stephanie. I'm new, and I'm rich. And if you're not nice to me, you can't fly on my private plane.

[Ronnie]

All right, well, I don't want to have to sit next to Adriana. Oh, why don't you fix your wrinkly knees, you old whore?

[Ben]

Adriana, behave yourself. You're acting like Goat Kiki.

[Ronnie]

Put my age on the cake. Stop being ratchet, Kiki.

[Ben]

You are too old to be talking like that.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God, she called me old. This is bullying.

[Ben]

But you called her ratchet.

[Ronnie]

No, I did not call her ratchet. I called her a ratchet. Like the tool.

[Ben]

That doesn't make sense.

[Ronnie]

I called her a hatchet.

[Ben]

No, you did not call her a hatchet.

[Ronnie]

I called her a palace.

[Ben]

That's not even a word.

[Ronnie]

Okay, well, you're an arm.

[Ben]

Narcissist.

[Ronnie]

You're a narcissist, Adriana.

[Ben]

Oh, so now she gets a party too. And scene.

[Ronnie]

Real Housewives of Miami. Kind of rooting for that show. You know, that show doesn't get enough respect. They're spreading rumors that they're gonna cancel that show. Don't you try it.

[Ben]

Don't do it.

[Ronnie]

I've actually gotten out to protest a little bit more the past couple of years, I would say, because you know the world. But you will never see me protest like you do if you cancel that show. I'm warning you right now.

[Ben]

That's right. Well, our next guest, we love because there's so much legal shit on Bravo at all times that we're like, hey, is that illegal? Hey, what's the deal with that lawsuit? Thankfully, there's a podcast to break it all down for it for us, and she is one of the co hosts of it. Please welcome from the Bravo docket, Sassy Alvarez.

[Ronnie]

Gorgeous. Gorgeous. And very Miami coated as well. Thank you, buddy. Cecila. Cecila, we love you. Love the Bravo docket. Love you both. Love you too, Angela, wherever you may be in Texas.

[Ben]

So, Sassy, how's. How's life going on the Bravo docket? What is the law. What is the law thing? The legal thing that is taking up your brain space right now, probably.

[Serena]

Wendy.

[Ben]

Wendy.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. So what do you think's going to happen?

[Serena]

In my legal opinion, which is my opinion, she's guilty as shit, guys.

[Ronnie]

Oh, no, sorry. Well, I mean, as my opinion, as someone who reads emails that are published. Same.

[Ben]

Yeah, sorry.

[Ronnie]

What do you think is going on with the Erika Jayne stuff? She's, you know, this season she's back talking like, oh, my God, they're trying to get me.

[Serena]

They're all out to get me.

[Ronnie]

I'm like, well, yeah.

[Serena]

And Kyle's like, she doesn't have the money. Well, no shit. She spent it all, guys.

[Ronnie]

So she's got the. The one of the bankruptcy trustees suing her. And then what's going on with the Marco. Marco one? Do you know?

[Serena]

Oh, man. Marco. Marco's still going. She really. Those guys over?

[Ronnie]

I know.

[Serena]

Really up.

[Ronnie]

So how's it looking? Good. How's it looking for her in these cases?

[Serena]

I think she's gonna get her moment. Yeah, it's coming.

[Ben]

Wow.

[Ronnie]

Huh. Interesting. She's done a pretty good job of rehab, so it'll be interesting to see how we react because a couple of years ago I was like, take her down. I'm like, I know. She's great.

[Ben]

Love her. I love her.

[Serena]

Again, keep chanting plane crash victims.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, yeah, for sure. I know. Keep in the game. Keep your head in the game.

[Serena]

I'll remind everyone.

[Ronnie]

Gas explosion. Gas. Okay, so.

[Ben]

So naturally we have you here to present the award for best DJ of the year.

[Serena]

I'm just as qualified as them. I have a Spotify premium membership.

[Ben]

Absolutely.

[Serena]

Let's go.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

True. Okay, so to read off, the nominees for best dj, dj, Maddie Reese from

[Serena]

Southern Hospitality, probably the most qualified.

[Ben]

Yes. I mean, she opened for James Kennedy once, so, you know.

[Serena]

Yeah. Dorinda Medley, probably the least qualified, but no one wants to tell her she's bad because they're afraid of her.

[Ronnie]

And nobody want a glass to the face on that one. You just do it.

[Serena]

Meredith Marks. Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

[Ben]

Winky Wingy.

[Ronnie]

Whitney. Whitney, Whitney, Whitney, Whitney. Bitch.

[Serena]

Probably the only DJ to wear a blazer.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Yep.

[Serena]

Maybe me next. Who knows? Randy the Butler, Southern charm.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Yep. Very qualified man.

[Serena]

Yeah, he's probably the best. And he doesn't even know how to use a computer.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Randy it's just record. It's the actual records, but he does it old school. Yeah.

[Serena]

Riley Burris. Next gen nyc now.

[Ronnie]

All right, I want.

[Ben]

I want to say something about this category. I want us. I want to say something. Those are the nominees. When I was showing Ronnie that these were the nominees, you went, oh, my God, did we forget to nominate Kyle? The answer is none of you guys voted for Kyle Cook. He was there, and he literally came in last in the qualifying round. Our poor Kyle.

[Ronnie]

Y' all hating Kyle after we, as

[Ben]

a community destroyed his marriage.

[Ronnie]

Oh, he did that himself.

[Ben]

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Ronnie]

I'm not taking responsibility for that. If I destroy a marriage, I will put a sticker on the back of my car with pride. Okay, I had nothing to do with that one. Okay. Who do we. Who do you think? Who are you going to vote for?

[Serena]

My votes for Meredith. She gives out caviar bumps. Where's the blazer? Yeah, it's very low energy. Probably on Xanax. I love it.

[Ronnie]

Exactly. I. I'm going to go for Meredith just because I really like Meredith and I think she had a shitty year. And I also am impressed with how many people she's pissing off across the country. There's always a Reddit thread like, I got fucked over at a Meredith Marks show because I paid for a VIP and someone spit a booger in my eye or whatever it is, you know, And I'm like, this is really impressive.

[Ben]

Yeah, I'm gonna go. Meredith Marks also, just because she's an icon.

[Ronnie]

Icon. Literal mother.

[Serena]

Best dj.

[Ben]

The winner is.

[Ronnie]

The winner for best DJ is.

[Serena]

Meredith Marr.

[Ben]

DJ Meredith Mars.

[Ronnie]

How dare you?

[Ben]

She did it.

[Serena]

Kidding.

[Ronnie]

Sassy, everybody.

[Ben]

Sassy. Thank you so much for coming.

[Ronnie]

Please go check out the bravo docket with Sassy and Angela. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin commercial.

[Ben]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Shifting a little money here, a little there, and hoping it all works out well? With the name your price tool from Progressive, you can be a better budgeter and potentially lower your insurance bill too. You tell Progressive what you want to pay for car insurance and they'll help you find options within your budget. Try it [e-mail] progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law. Not available in all states.

[Ronnie]

Hi, it's Mark Bittman from the podcast Food with Mark Bittman. And I'm here to tell you that the Whole Foods Market Cocina Latina Sales event is going on right now. Enjoy a fabulous selection of Latin American inspired flavors. From grab and go mains to great snacks, all at low prices. Whole Foods Market has the quality, convenience, and flavors everyone wants and appreciates. You can save on empanadas, burritos, soups, and more. Plantain tostones, Peruvian potato chips, tamales, taquitos. The list is almost endless. That's the Cocina Latina event going on at Whole Foods Market right now. Next up, to present the award for best fight. Oh, my gosh.

[Ben]

Oh, we love this. This woman from the morally corrupt podcast, Rachel Lindsay.

[Ronnie]

Rachel. Rachel.

[Serena]

I heard back that ass up and I was like, keep going. Thank you for not saying Bachelor, but that too.

[Ben]

Oh, my God. You're always so beautiful. It's crazy.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. I never know how anybody feels about, like, the past in general. Just in general.

[Serena]

Litigate the past on this stage.

[Ronnie]

Yes, we do. You know, like, if you say the Bachelor, some people. We don't talk about that anymore. We talked to Joanna Krupa once on a podcast. I don't know, some recap podcast, our podcast. But she was like, I'll talk to you about anything except Real Housewives.

[Serena]

I'm not Joanna Krupa. And like, be gone. Like, thank God she's not on Miami. It's thriving without her. You can ask me about my past. It's part of my story.

[Ronnie]

You know what I mean? Love it.

[Ben]

That's right.

[Ronnie]

I love that.

[Serena]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Well, we're really happy that you're here because best fight is one of the most important categories. It defines Bravo.

[Serena]

Verbal or physical?

[Ben]

Anything, Anything. Whatever. Any sort of clash. How have you felt about Bravo lately? Do you have any, like, favorites of what's going on? Any shows that are really, like, speaking to your heart?

[Serena]

Speaking to my heart. I mean, you just like. We keep referencing Miami. Miami is gold.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Serena]

Miami is amazing.

[Ben]

Good.

[Serena]

I think it's a telltale sign that they ripped it off a peacock and immediately put it on network because it was like, what are you doing? Miami's great. Potomac ended great. It ended great. It ended great. Come on.

[Ben]

I love Potomac this season.

[Serena]

It ended great. Like, Colorado saved it.

[Ronnie]

Oh, it did. Yeah.

[Ben]

I thought that the Colorado. I thought the season finale was so amazing. I thought them just driving around that state for an entire hour while a timer took down to them to go to the airport. It was perfect.

[Ronnie]

I travel around a lot with Ben, and Ben loves nothing more than proving somebody wrong on a. On a Google map. Loves it. Be like, but there is a gas station two Miles in the other direction. So

[Serena]

it saved it. It saved the season. Potomac's great, Miami's great. What else am I loving right now? Summer House is great right now.

[Ben]

How do you feel about the new people on Summer House?

[Serena]

I'd like to. The new people are fine. We don't know enough to talk about it, but like, you know how we were singing the song? Like, what would Jesse Solomon do? Yeah, we have to rewrite the lyrics. It's what happened to Jesse Solomon?

[Ben]

Yes.

[Serena]

Like, what happened? It's. He's failing us. I could go on a whole rant about Jesse. I don't know what happened there, but

[Ronnie]

it's, you know, Jesse Solomon has sucked

[Serena]

for a long time category up here.

[Ronnie]

He's got a good way of making you forget. Like, he's got enough charm to be like. And then you forget the last year and all the he had going on.

[Serena]

He is present this year. There is no charm.

[Ronnie]

And I think also now he's like being a Spotify singer and it's like, I think we just had enough.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Like, it's. That's what. You've gone too far.

[Ben]

The fact that it says Jesse Solomon musician. I just. I'm not.

[Serena]

Is that what it said? Summer house is great.

[Ben]

So let's move on to best Fight. Will you please do us the great honor of reading the nominees in this prestigious category?

[Serena]

I'm so honored to be reading Best fight. I feel like I'm so qualified.

[Ronnie]

You are.

[Serena]

To read the nominees. Okay. First up, Adriana and Marisol's inter yacht argument. Real Housewives of Miami. The Cash. Second up, Cash tries to confront Emmy about Will's southern hospitality, which is a season long fight.

[Ben]

I mean, take that image in. If you don't watch Southern hospitality. Look at that. Look at that.

[Serena]

It's the whole season. That's the whole season right there. Third up, Cole McBee versus A. Hill. McBee Dynasty. I don't watch McBee Dynasty, but anybody who's fighting with an inanimate object, I'm down. That might be my boat.

[Ronnie]

He literally punches a hill crying.

[Serena]

I've heard enough. A garden part or next up, garden part Party fight. Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Sorry, I'm four shots in.

[Ben]

That's okay. We appreciate it.

[Serena]

Next up, Georgia and Charlie fight about Bluetooth speakers on Next gen nyc. Too good. Next gen. It doesn't get enough. It doesn't get the credit.

[Ben]

I love that fight.

[Serena]

You know what's coming up next? Haitian mortician fight. Real Housewives of Miami. And last but not least, the whisper fight of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

[Ronnie]

Class. All right, who would you pick?

[Serena]

I mean, you're never gonna hear the words Haitishan. Haitian.

[Ronnie]

You're right.

[Ben]

You will not.

[Ronnie]

That's. If the Haitian and the mortician were dating, that would say their couple name.

[Serena]

Haitian mortician fight. You're never gonna hear those words again in a sentence. I have to give it to real housewives in Miami.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

The most unique for sure. God, I love that show. Please don't take that show from me. Okay, here you go. And the winner. Did you have a guess for best fight?

[Serena]

Oh, did I say heytician? That's a new word.

[Ben]

I'm with you. I'm with Haitian mortician. I mean, all these fights. Haitish Hatician. Honestly, I'm also. This may be shocking. I'm also just, you know, I'm well documented on how much I hate the McBee dynasty, but Cole versus the Hill was pretty good.

[Serena]

An inanimate object's great. Okay.

[Ronnie]

All right.

[Serena]

And the winner is. The Haitian mortician.

[Ben]

Mortician.

[Serena]

We will never have another.

[Ronnie]

Killed it. Rachel Lindsay.

[Ben]

Rachel Lindsay, thank you so much.

[Ronnie]

Thank you, honey.

[Ben]

All right, you know what's crazy, by the way, is that I will say that second place on that was the whisper fight. It lost by 12 votes. Every vote matters.

[Ronnie]

What was it?

[Ben]

Whisper vote.

[Ronnie]

Oh, wow.

[Ben]

Whisper fight.

[Ronnie]

Okay, and next up for best show of the year, Mary. To medicine.

[Ben]

Married to medicine.

[Ronnie]

Okay.

[Ben]

We are gathered here today in this big Lots parking lot to introduce you to your future Congresswoman for District 19. Heavenly times.

[Ronnie]

Thank you, quad. This is Quad Lunsford, everybody. Ladies and gentlemen, Quad Lunsford. Great job, Quad. Great job.

[Serena]

I am not Lunsford.

[Ben]

I. I left that man ages ago. He disrespected the core of my very soul.

[Ronnie]

All right, well, Quad Webb, everybody. Quad Webb, everybody. The most respected woman in politics.

[Ben]

That man tore my heart out of my desk and served it up on a platter for breakfast.

[Ronnie]

All right, take a seat, Quad. You're just a campaign manager.

[Serena]

Robbed me of my innocence.

[Ben]

Stole my peace.

[Ronnie]

Hello, citizens. Hello, citizens. I'm Heavenly Karms. I'm here to represent all of our needs in the government and our mouths, because I am a dentist as well and a wig seller. Now, are there any questions on dentistry, government, or wigs?

[Ben]

What do you plan to do about the state of the justice system in our city?

[Ronnie]

Your mama needs a justice system.

[Ben]

Uh, how are you gonna be a congressperson when you curse people out all the time.

[Ronnie]

At least my husband doesn't have a tiny dick. Shut the fuck up, Toria.

[Ben]

See, everyone, see, she can't be the president.

[Ronnie]

Your mama can't be president. Toya. Shut your goddamn mouth.

[Ben]

As a doctor who sells vibrators, I would like to remind everyone that we are sisters.

[Ronnie]

I object on the grounds that. That one man took my confidence.

[Serena]

He put it in a blender.

[Ronnie]

He made a smoothie out of it. A smoothie. I demand respect.

[Ben]

See you at the polls.

[Ronnie]

Everyone married to medicine. Oh, heavenly. Please never leave my television. Please. I love you so much. Now, to present the award for best travel drama, a friend who traveled very far and wide to be here. Elizabeth Day, ladies and gentlemen, author and podcaster, Come to me, Elizabeth.

[Ben]

Elizabeth Day, everyone. Welcome to the stage recently seen on Watch Happens Live just two days ago.

[Serena]

Tough cookie with a big old schlong.

[Ben]

The beautiful Elizabeth Day, everyone.

[Ronnie]

Elizabeth Day, the gorgeous. God, you look incredible.

[Serena]

No, sorry, I'm not having that. You look incredible.

[Ben]

Oh, stop it. Stop it.

[Serena]

I know that 95% of people here won't know who I am, but all you need to know is that I was once informally approached to be a Real Housewife of London.

[Ronnie]

Oh, why didn't you do it?

[Serena]

I didn't do it because I love watching these shows so much that I didn't want to see how the sausage was made. And I'm extremely conflict avoidant, and I just couldn't take the heat on social media.

[Ronnie]

You are. They would have really eaten you up then, huh?

[Ben]

I want so desperately for Bravo to bring Real Housewives of London stateside, because we watched the first episode and it was like Chef's Kiss. It's what we need. Is it the Rest of the City season as good as that first episode?

[Serena]

Yes. In the first few episodes, there is a cat fight over dentistry. And that, for me, is just like peerless Real Housewives content.

[Ben]

You also have.

[Ronnie]

And it's a child. It's child dentistry, right?

[Ben]

It's child dentistry.

[Ronnie]

One of the kids went to the dentist.

[Ben]

That's right.

[Ronnie]

Yes. And she's like, I wrote a Google review about it.

[Serena]

Don't mention the children.

[Ben]

And you also have a new book out, right? One of Us. One of Us. One of Us.

[Serena]

One of Us is like a mashup of the Talented Mr. Ripley Succession and the OG Real Housewives of New York.

[Ben]

That's so good. Everyone better get it. So we have you here, Elizabeth, for a very, very important category where lots of intrigue happened in the world of Bravo. This is the category of Best or best travel drama.

[Ronnie]

Yes. How are you? Are you ready?

[Serena]

The nominees for best travel drama are. Kristen Doughty acts chaotically while Luke tries to propose to her on a boat. The Valley.

[Ben]

By the way, I just love hearing your British accent say Kristen doute. Kristen Doughty. It's like I've never heard Kristen sound so elevated in my life. Kristen Doughty.

[Serena]

Lisa Hochstein arrives two hours late to sprinter van Real Housewives of Miami.

[Ronnie]

Y

[Serena]

Meredith Marks has unconfirmed emotional reaction on flight while watching crazy rich Asens. Or did she? Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

[Ben]

It's an emotional movie.

[Serena]

The season finale, roaming around Colorado. Real Housewives of Potomac. And finally, Stephanie oversees private plane logistics. Real Housewives of Miami.

[Ronnie]

All right, so what's your. Oh, Stephanie getting some booze or logistics? It's. I'm not sure what. Fuck logistics. I've had it. What would you say? What's your vote?

[Serena]

I have a tie between the roaming around Colorado because those were three of the best episodes of reality TV I have ever seen.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Serena]

And when angel was like, the experience is still available to you. And they had. They had 10 minutes to get to the airport. And I was freaking out because I'm someone who likes to get to an airport at least two hours in advance of my flight. And I was like, they've got the flight departure on the countdown, but they don't have the check in time. So that was stressing me out.

[Ben]

Me too.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God.

[Ben]

I was like, is this when they have to be at the airport? Is this when they have to have check in or is this when the plane leaves?

[Serena]

Exactly. Okay. And then. And the joint equal as Meredith Marks has unconfirmed emotional reaction because in a way that has shaped so much of the culture of our last season of reality tv.

[Ronnie]

Oh, yeah.

[Serena]

Before we announce the winner, can I just say we are here at the most incredible awards show of the year. Yes. Forget the Oscars, okay? And everyone else is getting an award. But I want to give an award to you, Ben and Ronnie, because you. You mean so much to me personally and so much to everyone here. You bring us so much joy. You make us feel seen. You make us feel part of a community. What you do, you make it seem effortless and it's so hilarious and joyous, but I can only imagine the amount of work it actually takes. And I just want you all to give it up to Ben and Ronnie. Thank you. Cheers. Cheers, everybody.

[Ronnie]

Cheers. Thank you.

[Ben]

I couldn't do it without Ronnie. I really couldn't. She's the best partner.

[Ronnie]

Okay. Do you agree with her choice that

[Ben]

we're the best ever?

[Ronnie]

No, she chose me. She said Ronnie. Ronnie went out of Ronnie and Ben. I choose Ronnie.

[Ben]

I would also choose Ronnie and I would also. Best travel drama, I have to say, partially because it was actually filmed. I'm going to say Colorado, Potomac.

[Ronnie]

Wow, y' all are crazy. I mean, that was fun and everything, but you're overselling that. It is Meredith Marks on the plane. Are you kidding? That is going to shape TV for the next decade, people. There's Whitney's going to be talking about that in the old folks.

[Serena]

Meredith got drunk on a plane and

[Ronnie]

got me to Britney.

[Serena]

And can I just say quickly that I've watched crazy rich Asians on a plane and I can't remember the ending. Am I hooked on Ben?

[Ben]

Someone.

[Ronnie]

Someone finally got good at mahjong.

[Ben]

And that was mahjong. Yeah. And Michelle Yeoh is fabulous. That's all you need to know.

[Ronnie]

All right, here you go.

[Serena]

The. Wait, how do I.

[Ronnie]

Girl, look at those nails. Those nails are incredible. Are those like tiger's eye nails?

[Serena]

Those are tortoiseshell nails.

[Ronnie]

God, that's beautiful. All right. The winner for best travel drama.

[Serena]

Meredith Marks has unconfirmed emotional reaction on flight while watching crazy Richie.

[Ronnie]

Yes. Meredith Marks.

[Ben]

Congratulations, Elizabeth there for your kind.

[Ronnie]

Her book One of us is out now. Go get it. Oh, my goodness. Is it this?

[Serena]

That feels right.

[Ronnie]

Okay.

[Ben]

Yeah, this one.

[Ronnie]

In a ceremony held earlier this evening, we awarded things that just couldn't fit tonight. So please, in a ceremony earlier this evening, we would like to congratulate the winner for best vote throwaway vote.

[Ben]

The Bill Gates awards for excellence in charitable giving goes to. Britt Eady for donating one pack of toilet paper to hunger hungry children on a Real Housewives of Atlanta.

[Ronnie]

The best tasting substitute for a personality. Adam's tabbouleh on the the Valley Persian style tabouli.

[Ben]

The because we didn't have a category for most terrifying mother with a psychiatric psychiatry degree award, Reba from Real Housewives of Beverly Hill

[Ronnie]

Business least likely to gain a single customer after being featured on national television Wonderland outdoors. The Real Housewives of Potomac. Congratulations to all of the winners.

[Ben]

Congratulations. Congratulations.

[Ronnie]

And now someone is here to present best scandal who was actually involved in one of the best scandals of the year. And I think a lot of us are still pretty pissed about it. Please welcome to the stage the gourd, the absolutely stunning. I can't even oversell that. Katie Janela from Real Housewives of Orange County. Katie. Oh, My God. Over there too.

[Serena]

My lovely husband is here.

[Ben]

There's Matt.

[Serena]

He actually was better at shade than I was. But I will say I'm the artist formerly known as the only Asian on Orange County. Probably the only one there will ever be.

[Ben]

I was gonna say Katie. Unfortunately, we are going to have you take a lie detector test tonight.

[Serena]

And is it a real lie detector, though not an actor?

[Ronnie]

No. Yeah, that was pretty shady. And then they found all the IMDBs of the lie detector.

[Serena]

Actually, I did. He gave it to Jen and she's, you know, an idiot. But. Okay, listen, for my. For my payment for being here, I need you to do an impression of Emily because it's literally the best.

[Ronnie]

What are you talking about? I don't do anything like Emily.

[Serena]

You have to wear jeans.

[Ronnie]

But how could you give me a size 8?

[Ben]

I've got a taco in my pocket.

[Serena]

Do you know what's great? Can I just say, Emily is talking about tacos all the time. And you know the only housewife that has a deal with Taco Bell.

[Ben]

Oh, really, Katie?

[Ronnie]

Taco Bell deal?

[Ben]

You will have a dill. You have a taco. You have a taco contract.

[Serena]

I'm obsessed with Taco Bell.

[Ronnie]

Oh, the best revenge is served.

[Serena]

Cheesy with a brand deal.

[Ben]

Congratulations. Yeah. What's life been like now in the wake of all this madness that happened on your tenure with Orange County?

[Serena]

Well, when I was fired, they called and said that I didn't fit in. And aside from Tamara, you're right, I don't. Because I have taste. And my husband likes me. Me.

[Ben]

I. I have to. Okay, I. I have to ask a question. What's so crazy is that like, when this whole like maelstrom started, it was cuz Tamara started it. And then somehow though, Tamara's the only one that you end up being friends with. How did that happen?

[Serena]

Okay, so when I was. I don't know if you guys watched, but the episode of Heather Dubrow's birthday party, I was outside fighting with Tamara and I was getting her wrath, right? And I looked at my producer and I was like, you know what? I can respect her because she keeps the story going. We don't have a housewife without Tamara, to be honest with you. And even today, she text me today and asked how I was doing and I offer her nothing. I'm not on the show. She's actually been very kind to me.

[Ronnie]

Maybe she likes tacos.

[Serena]

Maybe she wants my Taco Bell gold card.

[Ben]

You're like, I have nothing to offer except tons of free tacos.

[Serena]

You have to eat a double decker taco.

[Ronnie]

Do you really have a gold card?

[Serena]

No, I'm putting it out in the universe. I'm manifesting it.

[Ben]

Yes. I was getting so manifesting.

[Ronnie]

Where's my gold card manifest?

[Serena]

It's my moment. It's my moment.

[Ben]

Would you ever go back if they said we want you to. You know, what we actually want? Want you to come back or maybe go to Beverly Hills or show up? Would you ever do it? Is the door still open for you to go back to Bravo?

[Serena]

If.

[Ben]

If they came back to you?

[Serena]

You know, this season, my dear friend Kathleen Martinez was casting and she is an incredible immigration attorney. And I would go back if we could go together.

[Ben]

Okay, great.

[Ronnie]

Oh, wow. Right on. Oh, and we'd have some attorney versus attorney.

[Serena]

She actually turned it down. They called her and gave her the role and she turned it down because she said, I am never replacing the only woman of color that was fired.

[Ronnie]

Wow. Oh, wow. Right on. So how's it been? Are you glad it turned out the way it did in a way? Like, did you. How do you feel about it? Because I don't know, some people. Some people try that bullshit line when they're like, oh, my God, Stepping away.

[Serena]

I was really upset at first because it was something that was taken away from me without my chew choosing and I'm controlling. But now looking back, it was probably best. You know, I feel like I went out on top. My kids are amazing. My husband and I love each other, and the fans have been so nice. So I'm.

[Ronnie]

Okay. Okay, that's good. Right on.

[Ben]

Well, Katie, will you. Will you please read the nominees for Biggest Scandal?

[Serena]

Oh, I hope I'm in here. Oh, I am. Okay. Okay, the first one is Adriana and Julia slept together. Real Housewives of Miami.

[Ben]

That. That was a thing.

[Serena]

I mean, I record everything. I E. Shannon. So where's this. Where's the footage of this?

[Ben]

I know, right?

[Serena]

Okay. Galena maybe kills chickens, maybe destroys cars, definitely drives off road. McBee dynasty.

[Ben]

These are all things that happen.

[Serena]

She's actually so nice. I met her at Brava Cox. She's lovely. Yes. Okay. Georgia doesn't wash her hands.

[Ronnie]

Ew.

[Serena]

Next gen nyc. Ew. Maga. Gretchen Rossi. Social media. Rhc.

[Ronnie]

Boom.

[Serena]

Wear a red hat. Gretchen. Wendy and Eddie arrested for fraud. R H, O P. I like Wendy.

[Ben]

I love Wendy.

[Serena]

She's so nice and she's gorgeous. Even her mug shot is pretty.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. And it's a shame too, because Wendy actually had probably her best season on the show. I think everybody loves even people who didn't love Wendy before. Like, I love her, you know, and then the. Then you go to jail or whatever. So that sucks. Okay, who would you pick?

[Serena]

Well, I want Gretchen Rossi to win.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, she should.

[Serena]

She needs to be held accountable for something.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

What do you think I would do for. Honestly, I love Georgia doesn't wash her hands as a scandal. That was my favorite. I loved that.

[Ronnie]

I'm gonna go for the newbie here because I think Galena is an icon and the mess that she got into to in just one single season, especially like being a Russian American and coming here with nothing and working as a maid. And look at her now. She's the star of my life. She's earned it.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

So I'm going to go as Go. Fantastic. Okay.

[Serena]

The Oscar goes to Wendy and Eddie arrested for fraud. Yeah.

[Ronnie]

That was a big one.

[Ben]

That's a big one. Katie Janela, thank you so much for everyone. Give it up for Katie Janela.

[Ronnie]

Thank you so much, Katie Janela from the Real Housewives of Taco Bell. Love you, Matt. And if you don't believe that Matt is one of the best husbands on the earth, that man is down there doing all of her pictures for her. He even has a light that he like. I mean, that's a good man right there. They don't grow them on trees, that's for sure.

[Ben]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds of Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it. So your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations.

[Serena]

Have you ever been stuck on a weight loss plateau? Trying everything and anything you can to lose that extra weight and reach peak health? We've all been there. But Noom's unlocked a secret to reaching the mountaintop. Go in Micro. The Noom GLP1 microdose program starts at $99 and is delivered to your door in seven days. Start your microdose GLP1 journey today at Noom.com that's n o o m dot com Noom micro changes big results. Noom GLP1 RX program involves healthy diet, exercise and support. Individual results may vary. Meds and personalization based on Clinical need not reviewed by FDA for safety, efficacy or quality. No affiliation with Novo nor Nordisk Inc. The only U. S. Source of FDA approved semaglutide. Not available in all 50 US states.

[Ben]

The scandal category. We have a lot of we. I mean, we're just always getting scandals.

[Ronnie]

We.

[Ben]

I mean, we just barely got out of one.

[Ronnie]

Well, that Jill Zarin thing, I mean, wow, that was a big one to happen. Jill Zarin coming out and doing the whole, like, oh, my God, that bunny. Like, what am I supposed to to do? Am I supposed to understand this? Where are the white people? Turn around and look at the room you're in, you dumb ass.

[Ben]

But it did. It did make me wonder. I started to think about that show, the. The golden life that they're going to do. And I. I had to imagine what it must have been like for Ramona when she got the phone call that she was coming back to television.

[Ronnie]

Man, I would love to see what it was. Was like when you were imagining it. Maybe you should sing about it, Ben.

[Ben]

Maybe I should.

[Ronnie]

Whoa.

[Ben]

I know you wanted me to stay But Bravo said I'm more tone deaf than Luann's Cabaret. And I heard that there's a special place where women support women every single day. I'm having wicked dreams of leaving NYC I hear the sunshine stay it's where I gotta be I'm still hot and ageless so caduce to me Camera's coming soon let's grab the Peanut Rouge. Whoa, where do I go? I'm an old Roni girl Dancing at Mar a Lago and I'm just having fun I'm hitting my prime get ready, it's turtle time at the old Roni Club I'm gonna keep on dancing at the old Roni Club I'm gonna keep on dancing down in West Palm Beach I'm gonna keep on dancing at the old Roni Club Old Ro. Don't think I've left Bravo behind just because I've moved to E. You're always on my mind. I've got a lot on my mind, okay? There's a lot of things going on in the world. It's a Super Bowl. Jill Zarin got upset. Bad bunny. I saw a homeless person. He was very scary. He didn't have a job. He had no money. I was like, you know what?

[Ronnie]

I'm sorry.

[Ben]

I'm sorry. Get a job, okay? Do something with your life, okay? Ben or Ramona, whatever you are, we

[Ronnie]

need to move on.

[Ben]

Let's face it, Jill Zarin went astray. Calm down. Take a Xanax. Dorinda's here.

[Ronnie]

Okay. Wow.

[Ben]

Bethany.

[Ronnie]

Wow.

[Ben]

I'm an old Roni girl But I look younger than Avery now I'm like a fine wine I get better with time Mario, get in line. At the old Rony Club I'm gonna keep on dancing at the old Roni club? Club I'm going to keep on dancing West Palm Beach I'm going to keep on dancing at the old Rony club Old Rony club One more time. Old Rony Club I'm going to keep on dancing at the old Rony Club I'm going to keep on dancing down at West Palm Beach I'm going to keep on dancing down at old Roni

[Ronnie]

Club oh, old Rony club.

[Serena]

Whoa.

[Ronnie]

Sword.

[Ben]

Tag. Sword. So, yeah, I think that's probably what happened, you know, when Romana got that call. Yeah.

[Ronnie]

E wishes. E wish wishes. Our next category is best villain. Biggest villain.

[Ben]

I guess I should say biggest villain.

[Ronnie]

And here to serve the award is one of our favorite, most gorgeous men and very, very talented writer, Mr. Diallo Riddle.

[Ben]

Diallo Riddle, everyone. Beautiful couture. Beautiful Diallo.

[Ronnie]

Check, check.

[Ben]

Diallo. Thank you for writing that wonderful Trader song earlier.

[Ronnie]

Oh, no, thank you. And can I just say, as one, obviously on loan from my friend Bronwyn. Can I just say that that song is amazing. Your song is amazing. I mean, make some noise for the Watch what happens crew. They are so talented.

[Ben]

Thank you.

[Ronnie]

Working with you guys this week, it was like being in theater camp. Like, I just. You guys are so talented. I just.

[Ben]

I'm.

[Ronnie]

I'm.

[Ben]

I'm.

[Ronnie]

I'm just a big fan of your show. Thank you, Dialo. We love you.

[Ben]

Thank you, Dialo.

[Ronnie]

All right, so what are you working on right now? What am I working. You got some pretty good ones coming down the pike, eh? Like professionally? Yeah. Oh, what was around your house? I was like, my wife and I have a babysitter tonight, so I'm going crazy. Got a boy. A lot of. Lot of boos backstage. A lot of boos out there. Yeah, apparently. And. And, you know, I'm.

[Ben]

So.

[Ronnie]

I got to present best villain.

[Ben]

Best villain. Yeah, we're in that. We're in the final stretch here. We're in the big categories.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

And we thought, like, especially because the character you play on Sherman Showcase, where you've got that amazing eye patch, you. I mean, you have to present villain.

[Ronnie]

The best villain I have coming up is I. I'm on the Amazon series, Barbershop Producers by Kevin Hart. And I will say This. I play a prosperity preacher.

[Ben]

Oh, okay.

[Ronnie]

And that has been a lot of fun. I was trying to point to Amanda Francis.

[Ben]

Like Amanda Francis.

[Ronnie]

It's like the barbershop version of Amanda Francis. Is your character. I love it. Bringing a little Beverly Hills. Well, congratulations. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. I'm so excited. This is such a fun category. I think like, you know, let's get into it.

[Ben]

Yeah, let's get into it. Let's get the biggest villain. It's a really strong category this year.

[Ronnie]

Well, first of all, let me. I'm so sorry. Yes. I have to say Janet from the Valley. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. Got super pissed.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

Because she is included with a bunch of abusive men. Okay. I actually will give Janet this.

[Ben]

We'll give her the credit for that

[Ronnie]

because that is pretty shitty. But the way that it worked out, we just named a ton of shitty people and Ador America picked the abusive men and Janet.

[Ben]

But maybe next year we'll. We'll separate out like the villains versus the pieces of.

[Ronnie]

We shouldn't have to have an abusive piece of shit category, but we probably need one after this year. So anyway, go ahead. Sorry, Janet. Let's get into it. This is the. These are nominees for biggest villain. First up we have Erin from Denise Richards and her wild things.

[Ben]

Right off the bat. Right off the bat. Yeah. He sucks.

[Ronnie]

By the way, How. How great did Denise look on that recent episode of Beverly Hills? She looked great, didn't she?

[Ben]

Absolutely.

[Ronnie]

Absolutely. Oh, here comes a good one. Next up, we've got Colton from the Traitors. Strategic gameplay hits different. When we know what we know. Yeah. When we know what we know. Yeah.

[Ben]

We were trying to get a really good image of him with the pearls, but you know what?

[Ronnie]

I know. Let's not all those pearls. Can I just say though, that whole thing where Michael Rapoport was using C adjectives, you know, conniving, commiserating. Colton. It was just like commiserating is not a bad thing, bro. A nun, drum. Cubic. He was like custodial, congenial.

[Ben]

It's like Michael Creative.

[Ronnie]

That doesn't really work. Fabulation, all. How does. How does Brahma live like this?

[Ben]

I don't. I'm not sure. You know what?

[Ronnie]

When God closes a Todd door, he opens a Rihanna window.

[Ben]

That's right.

[Ronnie]

All right.

[Ben]

I love that.

[Ronnie]

Janet Caperna. The Valley Janet, my sister calls her. My sister calls it the self appointed hall monitor of adulthood. Yeah. And I love that. I love that. Uh oh, this Is one Jax Taylor, the Valley

[Ben]

now an evergreen nominee. Yeah, he's.

[Ronnie]

Jax has been in this category every single year he's been on television. He looks high there. Yeah, he. He looks like. He looks like when. When personal growth is optional.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

You give drugs a bad name.

[Ben]

So what is.

[Ronnie]

What would.

[Ben]

What's your pick for best? Phil or big? Not best. We'd actually. Oh, we got one more.

[Ronnie]

There's one more. There's one more.

[Ben]

There's one more.

[Ronnie]

We got one more. We got one more. We got the front door of Summer house. All right, so who's your vote? This is a tough one. I mean, obviously, Aaron is the real villain. He's. There's nothing. Almost nothing funny about him. The friend. You know, I'm gonna. I'm gonna. I'm gonna think it's. I think it's Colton. You think it's Colton? No, not. Because he is the biggest. I mean, like, look, the biggest villain. Villain is Aaron. But, you know, we. I come from a traitor's family. We're traitors together.

[Ben]

And it's like he's the. He was like the villain in terms of, like, storyline villain as opposed to, like, too real. It's like, almost uncomfortable. Villain.

[Ronnie]

Right.

[Serena]

Right.

[Ben]

Sort of. Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Because then in a way, you're kind of awarding like an abuser.

[Serena]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

It's weird. It's a weird position. It's a weird position we put ourselves into.

[Ben]

I'm just going to put my. My money on the front door. Be done with it.

[Ronnie]

I agree.

[Ben]

Front door. We vote for the front door.

[Ronnie]

I'm going to go with Jax because I feel like Jax is the biggest asshole. But it's also been. He's a person that we've been waiting to see go down for years.

[Ben]

Yeah. And, I mean, Jax has gone down many times.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. But this was good. All right, well, there are a million envelopes up here, so I don't know. Oh, here we go. We're a very organized award show going on here. Here we go. And the award for biggest villain goes to.

[Ben]

Jack Taylor. Jack Taylor, everyone. The biggest villain of 2020. Sit.

[Ronnie]

Congratulations, you loser.

[Ben]

Riddle. We love you.

[Ronnie]

I will accept it in his dishonor. Yes. Thank you so much. Love you. Thank you for having me.

[Serena]

Cheers.

[Ronnie]

The alo. Riddle, ladies, gentlemen, and. And gentlemen. Stole my look. Yes. Double Bronwyn. Katie. Looking good. Katie Kazorla and Walter, the crabbers, ladies and gentlemen. You guys are killing it. What's that going crazy about? Zach needs his award. It's like, give me that damn award. Yes, Zachary. Zachary has stolen an award.

[Serena]

Your email address.

[Ben]

All right, all right.

[Ronnie]

Oh.

[Ben]

Appropriately, it's time for our fifth of six best Bravo show nominees. The Valley.

[Ronnie]

The Valley.

[Ben]

The Valley.

[Ronnie]

Jax, you need to go to rehab. I can't have our baby turning out like you.

[Ben]

He wishes. He doesn't even have any Instagram followers.

[Ronnie]

Get out of my house, Jax.

[Ben]

Why do I have to go to rehab? Danny's the alcoholic.

[Ronnie]

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm not an alcoholic. I'm a dad. I've got three under three.

[Ben]

You're drunk, Danny. You grabbed our friend's butt and you told her, get Daddy a drink.

[Ronnie]

Hey, hey, that's not alcoholism.

[Ben]

That's sexism.

[Ronnie]

Give me a little credit.

[Ben]

Stop being mean to Danny, Janet ka ka.

[Ronnie]

I'm not mean. I'm fun. I had my birthday party at Dave and Buster's.

[Ben]

Hey, Instagram. It's me, Jax. Welcome to Jax Cam. I'm in rehab and I need my son. You guys, hold on. Hold on a second. I got a call on the other line. Hold on.

[Ronnie]

Jax, what are you doing on Jax Cam? You're supposed to be in rehab.

[Ben]

I am in rehab.

[Ronnie]

Then why is there techno music playing? And what's on your nose?

[Ben]

It's rehab powder.

[Ronnie]

You guys, let's have a party to celebrate. Bungee. Wait, hold on. I'm getting a call. What do you want?

[Ben]

Hey, where's my invite?

[Ronnie]

Jax, what are you doing on Jaxx Ken? You're supposed to be in rehab.

[Ben]

I am in rehab.

[Ronnie]

There's literally a stripper sliding down a pole behind you, Jax.

[Ben]

So strippers can be sober now also, right? This is my show.

[Ronnie]

It hasn't been for the last three months. Boom. Mic drop, bitch.

[Ben]

Hey, hey, Kristen, look over there. It's a dolphin. It's a dolphin.

[Ronnie]

Dolphin, dolphin. It's your mommy.

[Ben]

Kristen, will you marry me and live in Colorado with no running water or Internet? Oh, my.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God. Wait, hold on. I have a call. Jax,

[Ben]

am I coming to the wedding?

[Ronnie]

How did you hear about my wedding? Jax, you're supposed to be in rehab.

[Ben]

I am in rehab.

[Ronnie]

Then why are you riding a dolphin? Hey, get up of my dolphin.

[Ben]

And soon.

[Ronnie]

The Valley. The Valley. Ladies and gentlemen, the Valley. Okay, and next up to present Non Housewives Show, It's Ryan Bailey.

[Ben]

Rob Bailey.

[Ronnie]

Get your booty out here, clown. Money can buy your cl. So good. It's bad with br. And also, soon to be a dad. Soon to be a dad.

[Ben]

Soon to be a dad. Are you so excited? Also, I just Asked Jason and Chris if they had their penis pump with them. Oh, it would be great to bring. No. Also, it is so dark to watch you talk about Jax, and it's like the Ghost of Christmas Future for those guys.

[Ronnie]

I know, I know.

[Ben]

It was. It was. It was weird. It was weird talking about Jax, I gotta say. So you have a baby on coming on the way. Yeah, Four. Four weeks away. We are due. It'll be our baby's first summer of Carl

[Serena]

Soc.

[Ben]

Are you going to name your child a Bravo? Like after a Bravo? Liberty. Yeah, what is it? Sheena Marie Parks Valette.

[Ronnie]

Amber. We have Amber Jr. Right.

[Ben]

No, her name. Her name's going to be Romy, not non Bravo.

[Ronnie]

Romy. Well, it's close, Romy.

[Ben]

It's actually very close.

[Ronnie]

Miami. Real Housewives of Miami.

[Ben]

I gotta go.

[Ronnie]

You didn't even realize you did it. As Miami leaves, Romy will take the scene. She's going to come out and be like, work on your wrinkled.

[Ben]

You old. My dad was always so weird. He would never let me be on a reality show.

[Ronnie]

Exactly.

[Ben]

Well, I think Romy's actually a really cute name. And we wish nothing but the best for you, Michelle. Yeah, actually. And I know, by the way, I know everybody said this, but I went to the first crappy awards, like, for me, right before the Pandemic, and I never seen anything like it where I was like, this is like a WWE wrestling match where I thought the audio. I was like, people are, like, tearing their chairs up and like. Yeah. So amazing.

[Ronnie]

You guys, like, so much. Played a key.

[Ben]

I met your parents tonight.

[Ronnie]

That was.

[Ben]

Yeah, you saw. That's right. You got the whole thing aging. Yeah. Look how formal we all are, by the way. We're all sitting here in our formal wear. Normally when we meet up, we're all just sort of like schlubby, you know? And here we're like, I'm still. No, you're not schlubby.

[Ronnie]

Where'd you get your suit?

[Ben]

Actually, at the Fashion District.

[Ronnie]

Oh, nice.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

That's good. That's more.

[Ben]

This was like a Bravo Con suit. And I've already gained weight from Bravocon. Me, too. Because we've been eating ice cream every night. Good for you. So I can barely fit into this.

[Ronnie]

Well, we got ours on our Amazon live. Thank you. Thank you.

[Ben]

Live purchase here.

[Ronnie]

All right, let's do best Non Housewives show. Ryan, baby, what do we got?

[Ben]

We're gonna start here. Okay. Yeah, it's all you. Next gen nyc.

[Serena]

See?

[Ben]

Southern hospitality.

[Ronnie]

It's a good One.

[Ben]

Oh, here we go. Summer House. The traitors.

[Ronnie]

Doing well.

[Serena]

Four under four.

[Ben]

The Valley.

[Ronnie]

Yes, he is four under four now. All right, what's your choice?

[Ben]

Okay, I gotta go. Summer house. I. For some reason, I love that show so much. Even though it's in deep misery with Kyle and Amanda.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

But, like, they could just. I could watch them make chicken salad and I would just be in love. I love it so much.

[Ronnie]

That is literally what you're watching.

[Ben]

You are watching chicken salad. I know. Carl's in the mix. He's in the mix. He's in the mix. Carl's in the mix.

[Ronnie]

You might see me a little more. I'm in the mix now.

[Ben]

A soft mix. So, Ronnie. What? I actually think that for my pick, this is a really strong category. I mean, it's really hard because the Traders just ended last night, so we're all in Traders mode. But if I have to realistically think about the whole year, I'm actually gonna say the Valley was my favorite non bravo. And I'm not saying that because we have Valley people here. It was, I think, an amazing season. It was. Are you nervous about season three? I'm always nervous about new seasons.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Yeah. And not because of non Jacks. I don't know why. I don't know why I'm nervous.

[Ben]

Are you ready to have Brittany date on camera?

[Ronnie]

I'm so excited to see a new chapter for Britney. I'm. I'm ready for a different, like. Ready for, like, tears over a different guy. Yeah.

[Ben]

All right, let us. Let's find out the best Non Housewives show. What do you guys all think it's going to be? Follow me down into the dead of night where all the flowers bloom.

[Serena]

The traitors.

[Ben]

The traitors.

[Ronnie]

Come here. It's amazing.

[Ben]

It's an amazing show. Thank you so much, Ryan Bailey.

[Ronnie]

Bailey, we love you, buddy. All right, Ryan Bailey.

[Ben]

All right, we're getting into one of our. We're getting to the real big categories now. We only have a few left.

[Ronnie]

Yes. Everybody, we know you're so patient out there. We love you so much.

[Ben]

You guys are really patient.

[Ronnie]

Okay, next up to present best Bravo moment of favorite two judgy girls, Courtney and Mary.

[Ben]

Two judgy girls. Everyone.

[Ronnie]

Looking gorgeous. Here you go. Just grab whichever. Oh, let me grab a chair. Here, take mine.

[Ben]

Take a chair. We'll get another one. Ronnie's getting the other chair in the meantime. Hi, guys. Welcome to the Crappies. If you guys are not subscribed to two judgy girls, you should be cuz. They are fabulous. How is it going for you tonight?

[Serena]

What a blast. I'm having the best time.

[Ben]

Well, thank you so much for joining us. We had so much fun with you at BravoCon.

[Serena]

Literally a dream.

[Ben]

What was your. What was your favorite part of Bravocon, by the way?

[Serena]

Can we talk about day 0?

[Ronnie]

Day 0 was probably the crazy, craziest

[Serena]

night that we've ever had. Literally no expectations, met all these Bravo labs, I was like, I could go home now. I couldn't, but I could.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Was there a Bravo Liberty that, like, really stood out to you that you met Joe Gorga?

[Serena]

He. He double Dutch for us without the ropes. What was my. Everything. He's like, you gotta talk to your family. It's about the family. Just adore him.

[Ben]

Can I say something? Something? Last weekend, we went down to Miami, and some of you guys may have heard this, but we went down to Miami, and I was just sitting there on a lounger, and who walks by are Joe and Melissa Gorga.

[Serena]

Was Backgrid following them?

[Ben]

What'd you say?

[Serena]

Backgrid? The paparazzi.

[Ben]

Oh, yeah. Yes.

[Serena]

Seemingly they're always having backgrid follow them in Miami specifically.

[Ben]

So I felt very lucky. And then the next day, we just ran into, on the street, Lisa Hoxtein. So that felt very sp. That was like Bravocon for us last weekend.

[Ronnie]

Wow.

[Serena]

Where are the photos? Because I heard they're on her phone.

[Ben]

Lisa Hochstein took. We took a selfie with Lisa Hoxtein. It's on her phone. We messaged her, hey, so great running into you. Could you send us the photo? And she goes, yes, loves. And that was it.

[Ronnie]

So that's all we got. And the same thing happened at Bravo. She came up and said, oh, my God. Why you do my voice like that? I was like, I don't know. She's like, let's take a picture. Let's take a picture. Never sent it to me. I mean, what the hell?

[Ben]

She.

[Serena]

Her facetune wasn't working that day.

[Ronnie]

I guess her face actually looks face tuned in real life. Like, I don't think she uses a filter.

[Serena]

That's like. Mora.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Yeah, Mora. Let's get into most memorable moments, shall we?

[Ronnie]

Memorable moment, ladies. Take it away, would you?

[Serena]

All right, let's do this. Adriana accuses Julia of sleeping with a

[Ronnie]

Haitian mortician

[Serena]

of Miami. Jax gets fired, goes to fake rehab, gets fired again. The Valley. Paige dumps Craig Summerhouse. The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Slash Below Deck down under crossover. Sandoval sings Doll Songs over the phone, the traders that was ad libbed. And finally, Zach stands up to Jax at Benji's party. The Valley.

[Ronnie]

All right, who do you guys want?

[Serena]

Who do I want? I think I want Paige dumps Craig because why? Mary? Craig is what, the biggest gaslighter on Bravo tv. Yes, I've said it for weeks now.

[Ronnie]

Yeah,

[Serena]

I like the Sandoval sings doll songs over them. Can you please repeat that again? The good.

[Ben]

All right, let's see.

[Serena]

Terrifying.

[Ben]

Who the people voted for for most memorable moment.

[Serena]

And the winner is. Adriana accuses Julia of sleeping with a Haitian mortician. Donating coffee maker.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Oh, wow.

[Ben]

Congratulations

[Ronnie]

for the Miami.

[Serena]

Where's the sponsorship?

[Ronnie]

Seriously, Where's Nespresso?

[Serena]

Where.

[Ronnie]

Where is Mr. Coffee or Funeral homes? Where are you? She's got it all. Courtney and Mary, we love you guys. Thank you for being here.

[Serena]

Yes. We love you guys.

[Ronnie]

Love you.

[Serena]

Thank you. Jakey, Come on.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. No, he is. All right, let's please welcome Jake back to the piano. Sorry.

[Ben]

All right, you guys, we're very close the end of the show. But before we close out the show, you know, we would like to take a moment to reflect on those who are no longer on Bravo.

[Ronnie]

And you know, whenever we do this, we'd like to have something really special sung because there's been a lot of loss this year. So today we have the beautiful

[Ben]

Jennifer Tilly, everyone.

[Ronnie]

Thank you. Thank you so much. It must have been called There in my shadow. You never have the light on your face. You were content to let me shine for so long. A beautiful smile to hide the pain. Did you ever know that you're my hero? You're everything I wish I could be. And I could fly higher than any go. Cause you, you are the wind beneath my wings. In memoriam, mia,

[Ben]

brynn, raquel, jt, gabby, brit, will austin, jacqueline, becky minkoff, sweet tea, ryan, taylor, imrel bailey, lexi. All these below deck people. Tj, gretchers, jill, zarin, nicki minaj hosting reunions. Jax, jax's bar below deck. Sailing yacht, roni reboot, denise's lizard, masha's chickens. Uni emily, stylist, georgia and omar, michelle and aaron, ariana and hudson, quad and king, sienna and shep. Ralph in the upstairs, joel and shannon, lisa and jody, mj and tommy, bronwyn and todd, katie, janela, uba, hassan, jenna lyons, jenna aiden, avi, paige, tesorbo, Garcelle,

[Ronnie]

bove,

[Ben]

kaimanda, Candy and todd.

[Ronnie]

Fly,

[Serena]

fly,

[Ben]

fly away.

[Ronnie]

You let me fly so high. Thank you. Thank you too. Thank God. For you, the winds beneath my wings,

[Ben]

Miss jennifer tilly.

[Ronnie]

But in all seriousness, we didn't want to add this into a jokey thing, but obviously we're heartbroken about Robert Cosby Jr. So sending all of our love to you, Mary Cosby.

[Ben]

Let's welcome this room to Mary Cosby.

[Ronnie]

Rest in peace, sweet Robert. Oh, my gosh. Jennifer Tilly, though, seriously, what a get. And also, what a babe.

[Ben]

All right, it's our second biggest category of the night, and we had to bring someone who's been at every Crappies in some form or another for the past several years. Please welcome to the stage the host of Love island usa, Arri Automatics.

[Serena]

What? Gentleman.

[Ben]

Hi. Yes.

[Serena]

Hi.

[Ben]

An icon.

[Serena]

We love you.

[Ronnie]

So life has changed quite a bit since the last time you were here, ma'. Am.

[Ben]

How are you?

[Serena]

Do you remember that time we had the crappies in the most torrential downpour?

[Ronnie]

Yes.

[Ben]

I will never forget that.

[Serena]

What a time.

[Ronnie]

They called it the LA blizzard. And there were literally cars floating down the street.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Remember, we walked outside, there were like cars going down the street.

[Serena]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

It was also three days before.

[Ben]

Like three days later.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. So it was a great. It was a great luckier all the way around. So good to see you. You're killing it.

[Serena]

Thank you. You guys, putting me at the end of the show has given me so much time at the open bar tub.

[Ben]

Good for you.

[Serena]

So it's been quite fun.

[Ben]

Ariana, we feel like we are your aunts and we've watched you grow up through the years. And I actually think it's so amazing that you host Love island now that you went from fan to host. And on top of that, you're like a good host.

[Serena]

Thank you so much. It's the most fun job ever.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. And you're back and you've been here for a couple of months now. You've actually had a. A break because weren't you do. You were doing one after the other. Right. You were doing Love Island.

[Serena]

Yeah. Then Games and Games was insane. It was. I was there every single day hosting challenges and challenges. When you watch the show, it looks like it happened in maybe like two hours. No, that's just like 12 hours sometimes. And I'm like, they're in sneak. I mean, granted, they're covered in slime and making out with everybody.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Serena]

But I'm like, I'm in heels, yo, for like 12 hours. And sometimes I get a little bit of slime too. Like, it's intense.

[Ronnie]

Do they still have you do like the full, like, Dress and, like, glamour shots where you're walking really slowly, and it's like, here comes Ariana, and you're, like, really slow. Takes 10 minutes to walk. And do they still do that on you?

[Serena]

Yes, of course.

[Ben]

I love that.

[Serena]

I mean, we couldn't not do it

[Ronnie]

right to do it.

[Ben]

I love when you say how the challenges take 12 hours. The reason why I know that is because there was that one challenge, I think. Was it last year maybe, where Paige desorbo was, like, a guest, and it was like, your guest, Paige Sorbo, and she asked, like, three questions, like, what would you. What's, like, the funnest thing you would do with your partner? She asked, like, three questions, and then all of a sudden I was like, paige, do. Sorbo had to leave. I was like, oh, they were shooting this for eight hours, and Paige is like, I've got to go.

[Serena]

I feel so bad because the. The area where we do all the challenges is up on a hill, so it's, like, wildly hotter than down in the villa. And then she had to do, like, lumberjack theme.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Serena]

So she was in suede, so, like, everything was just working against her in that moment to give her just a full blown heat stroke.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Was. Was it surreal the first time you got into the villa and you were like, wow, Somehow I went from being a fan, and now I'm like, somehow in charge of this.

[Serena]

Oh, yeah, absolutely. I did a couple of guest hosts during season five, and when I first walked in the villa, I was like, oh, it's fucking. It's real. And they kind of just. I mean, they set you up for success, but there's nothing that can prepare you for it because you can't do a dress rehearsal because the islanders are living in there, and there's cameras everywhere. So it's a little bit of, you know, here's a bit of the script. Here's a bit. A bit of what? A bit of what you're doing. Okay, now go walk down this hallway.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Good luck. Yeah.

[Serena]

I was like. I was terrified. And those wood decks are not even.

[Ronnie]

I know. And they put you in, like, serious hills.

[Serena]

Yeah. I have to, like. It's like, you know, that meme of Rihanna and the heel is just almost going through the New York City. Great. It's that every single time. Every time.

[Ronnie]

It's harrowing. Well, we have loved you for a long time, and thank you so much for being here.

[Serena]

Oh, my God. I love you guys.

[Ben]

Thank you for.

[Serena]

I love you guys so much. This is. I know it's award season in. In la. This is the award show that fucking matters.

[Ben]

We really.

[Serena]

We really is the one. How many times has she done this, though?

[Ben]

I know, honestly, like you, if you have not been able to come, you've always sent in a video. We've loved watching your star rise three times. It's amazing every time, whether it's in New York, wherever. We are so proud of you.

[Serena]

I love you guys. We still have to do our Hot Honey Rag musical number One of these Days.

[Ronnie]

Hell yeah. I know. We were supposed to do it last year and you were busy. We did it anyway, though. We'll. We'll figure it out. Okay, let's read them off, Ariana.

[Serena]

All right, let's get down to business.

[Ronnie]

Bravo, Liberty.

[Serena]

Oh, there it is. Okay, Gabby. Windy the traitors. I love Gabby. I love her.

[Ben]

Gabby's great.

[Serena]

Oh, she's so funny. Okay. Jennifer Tilly. Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. She's very popular. Okay. I think my personal favorite, Kristen Doty. The Valley.

[Ben]

Seriously? Seriously.

[Serena]

We love her. We love Dodie Paige Desorbo. Summer House. Rob Roush. The Traitors. Love island usa.

[Ronnie]

Rush. Rob Row. Isn't it Rob Ross.

[Ben]

No, no, this one's rough.

[Serena]

Stacy Rush.

[Ronnie]

Oh, Stacy.

[Serena]

Real Housewives of Potomac. And Zach Wickham. The Valley.

[Ronnie]

Wow.

[Serena]

Bravo. Liberty of the Year.

[Ronnie]

Who are you gonna pick?

[Serena]

Who am I gonna pick? Listen, my close personal friend, Kristen Doute. I can't not prick Kristin and had a good one.

[Ronnie]

Okay.

[Serena]

Okay. Bravo, Liberty of the Year. I better hear a drum roll. I want to hear a drum roll.

[Ben]

Drum roll. Jake.

[Serena]

I think Ariana should get it again.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Ariana wins.

[Serena]

Wow. Stacy Rush. Real Housewife of the Potomac.

[Ronnie]

Amazing. Nice. Congratulations, Daisy Rush. Thank you very much. Ariana Maddox.

[Ben]

Give it up for Ariana Maddox.

[Ronnie]

I want to trip over my skirt.

[Serena]

Thank you.

[Ronnie]

I know they're close to living. Yes. Oh, they will be spray painted again, my friends. I just got lucky on TEMU recently. All right. And now for our final nomination for the best show of the year, Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

[Ben]

Welcome aboard Motor Yacht Katina. We hope to make you wet.

[Ronnie]

Oh, you've already made me wet. Captain Jason.

[Ben]

You had sex with Captain Jason?

[Ronnie]

Not sex. We made love.

[Ben]

Oh, we didn't though to a buffet.

[Ronnie]

We love eating as friends.

[Ben]

I want to go to your buffet.

[Ronnie]

Captain, the buffet is closed. Mm.

[Ben]

Sorry I'm late to the cast trip.

[Serena]

Mm.

[Ronnie]

Captain, we have a problem. Pool floaty is talking.

[Ben]

That's not a pool floaty. That's a lady. She's just wearing a pool floaty.

[Ronnie]

You exploited the pool floaty?

[Serena]

Uh huh.

[Ben]

Uh huh. It's called fashion. And someone.

[Serena]

Mm.

[Ben]

Has been leaking stories about me being a felon. Mm.

[Ronnie]

I didn't leak anything. Why is everybody always blaming me for stuff? So I'm friends with news corporations. I'm not allowed to talk to my friends anymore.

[Ben]

If there's any criminal here, it's you, Lisa Barlow. You have lawsuits against you.

[Ronnie]

Case dismiss. Case dismiss. Scout dick sucker.

[Ben]

Lisa, you think you're better than everyone else here.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, but so does Blake Lively, so you know what? Take it up with Blake Lively then. Do you need her number?

[Serena]

I have it.

[Ronnie]

I have it if you need it. Wait, wait.

[Ben]

Meredith got wasted and attacked Britney on an airplane.

[Serena]

How dare you.

[Ronnie]

You are disguing.

[Ben]

We all saw it, Meredith. The entire sisterhood. You stabbed Britney in the face on the plane.

[Ronnie]

I was watching Crazy Rich Asians. It couldn't have been me.

[Ben]

I am Greek. You started her on fire on the airplane. We all saw. Yeah, she was. I watched it with her.

[Ronnie]

Oh, yeah, you watched Crazy Rich Asians? Then how did it end, Meredith?

[Ben]

Well, the crazy one told the Asian one to stop talking about my husband.

[Ronnie]

That was Rambo.

[Ben]

Fine. Well, the Asian one told the rich one that Britney is disgusting. Fatsy T. Okay, I'll give you a hint, Meredith. The captain fell in love with the Latter Day Saints. Tell all celebrities.

[Ronnie]

Um, that did not happen.

[Ben]

He fell in love with her. Book out now.

[Ronnie]

Ding, ding, ding. I'm upset too. What about me?

[Ben]

Shut up. Brittany and Sid.

[Ronnie]

Real House Swives of Salt Lake City.

[Ben]

Well, everyone.

[Ronnie]

Did they quit? Get up. Come on. Get out.

[Ben]

Get back up here. Katie, get back up here.

[Ronnie]

What are you in a union now? You don't get a break. Get your ass back up here. Okay, and now for the final category of the night, being presented by us. So take that. All right, guys, this is a big one. You have been the most patient crowd of all time. We love you. All right, let's get her done. Best Bravo show of the year. Married to Medicine Daddy.

[Ben]

Next Gen. New York City.

[Ronnie]

Real Housewives of Miami.

[Ben]

Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

[Ronnie]

Summer House. All right.

[Ben]

Summer House and the Valley.

[Ronnie]

All right. And the winner is. Oh, I kicked him off.

[Ben]

The winner.

[Ronnie]

The winner is.

[Ben]

The winner of best Bravo show of the year is.

[Ronnie]

Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. All right, everybody, thank you so much for being here. It's been an amazing year. We look forward to seeing you in 2027. Thank you, Walter. And you, Katie, the beautiful Jake. All of our guests and everybody here helping us out tonight. These gorgeous eyebrow twins, Chris and Jason.

[Ben]

Come on up here, guys.

[Serena]

Thank you. Thank you to Hobby Lobby. Thank you to Hobby Lobby.

[Ronnie]

All right, Katie, close us out.

[Ben]

Thank you guys for coming and thank you all for coming to watch Rock Rapids. The Golden Graphics. Good night, everyone.

[Serena]

Watch what happens. Watch what happens who cares what happens

[Ben]

when there's so much that happens?

[Serena]

Watch what happens. Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens Fake you. Hobby Lobby for my helping. Here's what happens when there's so much that crap.

[Ronnie]

Watch what crab is.

[Serena]

Who cares what happens when there's so much that grabens. Watch what happens.

[Ronnie]

Watch what grabens.

[Serena]

Who cares when Ben is where. Bring that jacket. Watch what happens. Watch what happen. Thank you for coming out tonight.

[Ronnie]

I hope you enjoyed the show.

[Ben]

Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King.

[Ronnie]

Our way is the Amber Way.

[Ben]

It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.

[Ronnie]

Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, She's a Daniella Etchells. We never miss her call. It's Diane Call Sunday in the park with Dylan Clark. Big yay. It's Emily Gaultier.

[Ben]

Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no Tricolus Hava Nagila Webber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go we all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no less

[Ronnie]

Namey sipped some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

[Ben]

She's not a McBee, she's a McBride. Jess McBride she's our favorite streamer.

[Ronnie]

Caroline Peacock, Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a B in your bonnet with Lacey B. Que sera sera. Whatever will be will Lauren Silsby. She gets an A from us. It's Lindsey D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry.

[Ben]

Aren't you glad It's Marianne Arens.

[Ronnie]

Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.

[Ben]

This is Living with Michelle Vivian.

[Ronnie]

I love Aya. Olivia Williamson.

[Ben]

She sure is swell. It's Raquel.

[Ronnie]

Yes, we can. It's Savannah.

[Ben]

Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.

[Ronnie]

Darn Skippy, it's Tippy. And our super Premium sponsors She's VVIP

[Ben]

It's Amanda V. Can I have a Kavanaugh? It's Anna Kavanaugh. Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD

[Ronnie]

we're taking the gold with Brenda Silva.

[Ben]

Let's get real with Caitlin o'. Neal.

[Ronnie]

Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses. It's Christine Hogle. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides.

[Ben]

Who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish. My favorite Murdo. Karen McMurdo.

[Ronnie]

She's a total knockout. It's Katie Manock.

[Ben]

Let's get Savage with Laura Wildman in the study with a candlestick. It's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron. She's a whiz. It's Liz Sarthie. Always killing it. It's Lola Al Kalani. Roger that. It's Marlis Rogers.

[Ronnie]

The incredible edible Matthew sisters. She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose. There's a chance of meatballs. It's Rebecca Cloud. She's our princess. It's Rebecca Prince.

[Ben]

Maximum love for Sandy Maximoska. She's the queen bee. It's Sarah Lemke.

[Ronnie]

We cannot tell a lie. It's Sarah.

[Ben]

Tell of son Shannon out of a candle. And Anthony. Please don't stop. It's solely and pop. Let's take off with Tamla Plane.

[Ronnie]

Strike a pose. It's Tory Rose. She ain't no shrinking violet. Cootar. We love you guys.

[Ben]

The longer you stay alive, the longer you can enjoy Boost Mobile's unlimited plan with a price that never goes up. So here are some tips. Do not parallel park on a cliff if you want to enjoy an unlimited plan with a price that never goes up. Do not mistake a wasp nest for a pinata. If you want to enjoy an unlimited plan with a price that never goes up. Do not microwave a hard boiled egg. If you want to enjoy an unlimited plan with the price that never goes up, Stay alive and enjoy Unlimited Wireless for 25amonth. Forever with Boost Mobile. After 30 gigs, customers may experience lower speeds. Customers will pay $25 a month as long as they remain active on the Boost Mobile unlimited plan. Here's how to stay alive longer so you can enjoy Boost Mobile's unlimited plan with a price that never goes up. Do not mistake a wasp nest for a pinata. Stay alive and switch now at boost mobile. After 30 gigs, custom may experience slower speeds. Customers will pay $25 a month as long as they remain active on the Boost Mobile unlimited plan. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all.