C (2:41)

You've been gone for six months. You've been gone for six.

B (2:45)

You have to earn the attention back. I'm not saying you don't, like, deserve

C (2:49)

beer pong with 21 year olds. Shut up.

B (2:53)

Look, everyone deserves love and attention from their spouse, but you also have to earn it. And you've squandered all your Amanda capital and you've got to build it back. It's up to you to put in the work for her to start opening up to you again. She's hurt by you. Okay, so Sierra's like. She's like, telling the girls, so weird

C (3:14)

to be standing up for Amanda today. It really is. Even though I still will stand up for her. Like, I still want her to go. I still want her to go find somebody and be happy.

B (3:24)

Just not west and not at Sierra's expense.

C (3:29)

Yeah, exactly. So.

B (3:30)

But this is what happened with, with Scandal. We had to sit there and, like, defend Raquel and we had like, keep saying disclaimers. Like, we are responding as if we were responding. And, you know, watch as watching without knowing that Scandal guys.

C (3:42)

I remember watching that when Katie was. When they were on like a trip and all the girls. It was Katie and that girl who's not on that much, Stassi's friend. What was her name?

B (3:52)

The real Christina.

C (3:54)

Yeah. And they were being really mean to Raquel and, like, mean girling her. And I was like, this is the moment Raquel decided to fuck all of your boyfriends. This is it.

B (4:03)

This is it, this is it. So Sierra's telling Amanda, you are such a lover, but there comes a certain point where you can't be miserable. And to make him happy, she's like, yeah, but can I be miserable to make myself happy? I mean, I guess. Isn't that what you're always doing? You can't. Okay. I've never been married, but I do know that my own mom divorced my dad for some of the same reasons that Kyle displays. Like, the way he speaks to you is so unacceptable. If everything that you do pisses him off, then maybe he needs a break from you. And if everything that he does is just, like, reactive, impulsive towards you, then you need space too, to, like, figure out your own shit. And again, Sierra being a great girlfriend, as she has been for several seasons on this show.

C (4:48)

Yeah.

B (4:49)

Not that I point that out.

C (4:51)

Yeah. So Lindsay's like, well, like, what have you Let him see what it feels like without you. And Sierra's like, yeah, I mean, just. It's more productive if you just separate. You can stay with me. And Mia's like, yeah, we'll take care of you. You deserve to be taken care of. She's like, yeah, you don't deserve to do all this by yourself. We'll help you. Amanda. And she think, that's why I love you guys. Like, I just. Like, I don't. I don't know yet. I don't know. But, like, you guys are so supportive. You over.

B (5:19)

I know. Oh, it's so fake. It's so bad. It's so bad. It's so bad. So it's now 8:37pm Specifically, 8:37pm and the party is still going. And Sierra gets in the mic and says, hey, y'.

C (5:37)

All.

B (5:37)

How y' all doing? I hope you all had a good time. She's like, gotta go. And, you know, Amanda's in the background going, you don't have to. You don't have to go, but you can't stay. What's the thing she always.

C (5:50)

You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here. And Lindsay's like, but ask anybody if they have a plane or a yawn. So now Kyle starts his living room dj, and he's like, we're gonna fire the beast. And everyone stays inside so he doesn't cry today. And they dance. And then Sierra's jumping in the pool. And Jesse and Amanda are in Amanda's room, and Jesse's like, I think Kyle wants to have a conversation because, like, Wes basically, like, he didn't yell at him, but, you know, he was like, dude, this is. And, like, I was really proud of West. He literally told Kyle off. And he said that Kyle has to apologize to you and not say anything else. Oh, yeah, These guys and their talk of guy code. Why would you do that? Why would you say, we're forcing your husband to apologize to you?

B (6:41)

They're trying to earn brownie points because that's what they do. They're always trying to be, like, the good guys. But also, I like Jesse saying, Wes, he, like, didn't, like, yell, but he was, like, really, really good. Like, implying that Wes came was, like, a shade lower than yelling. I'm like, west stared at a stain on the floor and basically was like, you're being, like, really mean to Amanda. And, like, you shouldn't do that anymore. And, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Am I getting trouble? I mean, it was like, they're making it sound like Wes came in. There's like, listen here, Kyle Cook, you better treat your wife with some respect. And it was like, not like that at all.

C (7:16)

Yeah. And Amanda's picking her underwear out of her butt, saying, I love you guys. You guys are the best. And that's why I keep coming back. Like, I don't come back for Kyle. So in the kitchen, west is throwing oranges at kj, and he hits him between the legs. And he's like, oh. So KJ's on the ground holding his nuts, and then Lindsay is gonna go take off her tits. And Mia goes, you want a TED Talk? She goes, no, I said, I'm taking my tits off.

B (7:44)

Yeah. He was like, because I'm ready to do a TED Talk. So people are taking off their costumes, and they're just sort of, like, sort of winding. Not really winding down because some of them are gonna go out, but Dara's making out with KJ on the bed. And Kyle's like, I'm lighter now. And Jesse is talking about, like, going out. And Amanda's like, kyle, you're staying here. He's like, why? You cannot go out looking the way you do right now, Kyle.

C (8:15)

So he's lying on the bed, and she starts, like, cleaning his face off and taking care of him and stuff. And Kyle's like, oh, my God, are you serious? Because, yeah, like, we're gonna need to get the rest. We need to get the rest off tomorrow, Kyle. But just relax.

B (8:32)

He's. Isn't this Kyle's birthday weekend? Also, I feel like. I mean, he should want to spend his girl. His. His birthday with his wife. But also, it's his birthday. I think he should be able to go out if he wants to.

C (8:47)

I just wish you would love me. It's like, oh, well, maybe if you were nicer to me, Kyle. And he's like, but we're going through a lot.

B (8:55)

Who,

C (8:57)

you and me? Yeah. I feel like we're in, like, trouble. Amanda. She's like, yeah, me too. I'm sorry about last night. But then why did it take you so long to say something? And, like, it's not the first thing you said when you woke up this morning. Why do you have to be told to apologize to me by guys outside named Weston Jesse, who are like, only have my best feelings at heart, unlike you, Kyle.

B (9:19)

I know we need to talk about this when we're both fully sober. Ah, I don't want that. You don't want to talk about it? No. I don't want to be sober. I drink more.

C (9:31)

So KJ and Dara standing too, and he did go to bed, and he's like, thank you for being so beautiful inside and out. And she's like, you don't have to thank me for that. Stupid.

B (9:43)

Just kidding.

C (9:43)

I love you. That was bully. That was. That was my bully. Good night.

B (9:47)

Thank you for being a huge pussy inside out. Just kidding. I love you, actually. So. So Ben and Jesse and Wes go out and they party, and they come back and they. They're back in the house, they're hungry, and they're sitting around, and Wes is like, guys, I said to Kyle, I go, did you apologize for your behavior last night? And then I hid behind a napkin until he went outside the room.

C (10:14)

And Carl's like, yeah, well, I talked to Carl, too, mostly about business stuff, you know, like brick mortar, etc. And we also talked about soft bar. You know, same thing. And I mean, like, my biggest concern is always, like, within the last couple of years, he's never had to face a big thing in his life. And, like, I worry it's like, kind of coming up to something like company folding or, I mean, his relationship folding. Kyle, Carl, this has been happening for years. Have you just not been here? Like, he's. He's been losing lover boy for years. He was complaining about the same thing last year, and he's been losing his marriage since the moment he made it. He was. He was almost divorced before he even got married.

B (10:50)

He cheated and almost lost Amanda. I think he's dealt with big things, but that's fine.

C (10:57)

Badly. I mean, he's dealt with. But he's dealt with big things poorly.

B (11:00)

But I think that maybe what Carl is really saying is he's never. Kyle has always had things kind of go his way. At the end of the day, it all just sort of works out for. For Kyle. And Carl's like, yeah, he's never really had, like, he's. He's. He's flirted with hardship, but he's never really had hardship. And the hardship is on the way. And Ben's like, well, everybody's kind of coming to a point with this. And. And Ben makes a triangle with his hands just in case no one knows what a point looks like. Like, okay, everyone, you're lucky you have a model here who understands geometry. When you put your fingers together in a triangle shape, it makes a point. And that is actually the point that I am making. Thank you, person at the window. Thank you. Thank you.

C (11:45)

Thank you, model. Clap it's time for a come.

B (11:50)

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A (12:25)

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C (12:56)

Commercial. It's time for a crappens commercial. So the next morning, west has slept with Sierra's boobs. Hope you enjoyed those, because that's the last bit you're ever gonna get. And Lindsay's like, did you guys share a bed? Darren? K.J. like, or did you sleep in separate beds? And she's like, we did not sleep in separate beds. The Mormon route was on the mind. And in the end, we chose cuddles.

B (13:22)

So what? So then Dara and KJ are cooking, and she's like, I always know that I like a guy when I start cooking for him because the best way to bully a man is make him delicious pancakes, especially when he has abs, because he knows he can't have too many of them bullied. So cooking with him is just like, I don't know, it's just. It's just better. And I knew that he didn't cook. And he also eats like a psychopath. He doesn't even put salt on his eggs. You don't season your eggs. I was like, that's actually a deal breaker for me. You need to be, let me season your food. And then he relented. And besides that, I haven't seen any glaring red flags. I mean, salt is a pretty bad one. And he's super hot and super cool and super fun. So let's let it roll. Like, wait a second. I kind of like this girl. I like her. I like her commitment to seasoning food.

C (14:05)

She talked about eggs. You're like, I'm in.

B (14:07)

She Was. I was like, wait, you should have led with the fact that you like to season your food. And also what is talked about seasoning.

C (14:14)

Stan. Dara. Stan.

B (14:15)

Okay, Dara, you've made. You. You've won. You made it. You made it. I know last week I dinged you pretty hard for the way you did a fake laugh and then said no. And I didn't like the sitcom energy of that, but you've fully won me over this week with your. Your commitment to seasoning and teaching kj why you should always salt your eggs.

C (14:35)

So now Lindsay is trying to teach west how to whisk eggs, and she's like, no, you have to whisk in, like, you know how to jerk off, right? And he's like, but I use my left hand for that. Just. Then use your left hand.

B (14:48)

And I'm sorry. Can I tell you something? As long as we're in a real, like, down on west moment in pop culture, like, he. This guy's 31, and he doesn't even know how to whisk a liquid. I mean, come on.

C (15:00)

I thought you were gonna jerking off, jerking off criticism.

B (15:05)

He knows how to jerk off. I can tell you that much. I would. In fact, I would wipe down those boobs he slept with last night. But I have to say, like, the thing with Wes is he's really good at presenting himself like he's 24, sort of like, not fully ready for the real world, but can. Can sort of navigate it. Kind of a young hip. And you're 31. Like, half the things that you acting like I'm scared about, like, you should start to be able to handle in your life. I say this as someone who's an immature 47.

C (15:39)

Yeah, whisking, right?

B (15:42)

No whisk, no reward.

C (15:45)

Exactly. West, get with it. Get whisk it. So breakfast is served, and there's some cream of wheat. And Sierra goes, is this cream of wheat made with milk or made with water? And Katie goes, milk. And she's like, okay, all right. Well done.

B (16:04)

Glad we settled that.

C (16:05)

It passed the past the Sierra test. She's like, okay. So Lindsay announces she's having a housewarming, and west is going to be gone because he's going to Italy for the week for one of his boys from high school. It's going to get married.

B (16:19)

And how many people does this cast know getting married in Italy? They have gone to, like, 10 at this point. I know that's like, a lot of Italian weddings, but also, I feel like

C (16:28)

people our age got married really late. And people their age are getting married younger and younger. Right. Like, I didn't have very many friends getting married in their 20s. It was like late 30s.

B (16:38)

Yeah.

C (16:38)

Early 40s. And now they're like, oh my God. Now, now we're 50. And everyone's like, I'm getting my eggs done. Okay.

B (16:44)

I got batch, I've had batches. There was like the, the, the people got married when I was like 24 or 24 to 26. And then there was like the 31 to 33. And then there was like a weird like last minute spurt of like the 38 year olds to like 41 year olds. But I'm not questioning that he's going to a lot of weddings. I'm just, I, I just feel like they're, they, they're constantly going to Italy for weddings.

C (17:06)

Would love straight, straight people with money, you know, do it. Poor people are not allowed in these friend groups. Like, sorry, Danielle, we're getting married in Italy. Yeah. Danielle's still catching.

B (17:19)

She's like, she's catching the train. She's like, I'll see you on the train.

C (17:24)

The train with a laptop. She's like, well, my app. My app. So now Jesse's like, wait a minute, you're inviting a guest to Lindsay's housewarming? Ben? And he's like, well, I've asked for permission for a plus one. No guarantees yet. Hope to meet her. Who said it's a her? And Amanda's like, I was just gonna say. So what else does everyone have going on this week? Sierra is going to go to North Carolina because she's going to meet with an architect for her house because they're going to start a renovation process. So she bought a house in April and she says that it's her grandparents house and when they pass, she bought the house from her dad and his siblings.

B (18:08)

And it's actually a very touching story. She basically says how like growing up she was always in all these different houses, but this is the one house that was like the constant one and that it was also her grandfather built it and that's where her dad and his siblings grew up. And you know, it's like, it's also like wrapped up in like the idea of generational wealth and it's all a really lovely story and that she is going, that she got it. It took a lot of work to get it, a lot of back and forth and that like this is such a big deal. And Mia gives this a really lovely speech. Being like, I know this is really hard I feel like you're being really humble about this, but this is a really wonderful thing that you're doing. And you're, you're downplaying it, but, like, it's a big deal and I'm proud of you. And Sierra's crying and it's actually, it is. This is a really tremendous thing.

C (18:55)

Yeah.

B (18:55)

And I thought it was like, you know, it's on these shows we see so much of, like, I am starting a skincare business. I'm so proud, guys. I am starting a candle business. Oh, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm going to. I'm going to make staplers. But these are staplers for girls with big breasts. You know, it's like. And everyone's like trying to do their entrepreneurial thing and it's actually really lovely that Sierra is saying, no, I actually saved up my money. I'm not trying to cash it in for some get rich quick capitalization off of summer house. I'm actually trying to give back to my family and, you know, keep this house in our family. I thought, like, it was pretty great.

C (19:34)

Yeah, it was cute. And the house I think is going to be cute when she's done too, because it's like a mid century house. Yeah, it's got some promise, kid. So then back at the table, Carl's like, oh, if you need us to come visit, let us know. Because you know what houses are made out of. Don't say it, Carl. Brick and mortar. Just saying, just, just saying. Just putting it out there.

B (19:54)

There's no bricks in this house, Carl. It was just wood frame and stucco.

C (19:57)

Oh, I didn't know, Diamond. I've been stymied. Stymie me softer, please,

B (20:06)

with horse Darko.

C (20:09)

So now west is like, wow, I know what that means to her. But like, you know, it's like weird not knowing, like, how to deliver it, I guess, or like how to tell somebody, like, you're super proud or like, happy of them. Like, when the relationship is just so strange.

B (20:25)

God.

C (20:26)

Boy who doesn't know how to navigate relationships. Oh, shit. Can't hold your hand closer. God.

B (20:33)

Yeah.

C (20:34)

Say, congratulations, I'm proud of you. I know you've worked hard for this, you loser.

B (20:41)

Everything has to be an existential crisis about this. And also, don't drag us through every single minutiae that goes through your brain about, like, how did you. Oh, my God, how do I say, like, congratulations? Like, when I don't even know, like, I'm really happy, but I don't know. I'm like, really, you're really. You're so happy. That's why you're going to wind up having a relationship with Amanda. That's the thing. That's what's so annoying. That's where to me, Wes really drives me nuts is that we're sitting here while the moping being like, what do I say? Because she doesn't want to hear me say I'm happy for her, knowing that it's all just bullshit. Like, you don't care about her that way. You don't care. You're trying to make it seem like you're being so overly considerate about her feelings. But if you were overly considerate about her feelings, you just would never have ever even opened the door to having any sort of secret relationship with Amanda. So don't give us this.

C (21:30)

He's just doing this act on TV to be like, oh, look how victim and how scared I am of scary, scary Sierra so he can use his ass pass. That's all. That's all he's doing. So, by the way, I just want

B (21:44)

to say something else. If you're going to have a cheating scandal on reality tv, don't do it while prices are up because we're. We're extra mad when world events are bad. This is where we channel our rage onto so good. Good luck West. Good luck.

C (22:01)

Yeah. So they talk about Lindsay asked who else has a house at the table. And Ben's like, I've got mine and Ben's. Ben owns his apartment, apparently, so Lindsay also high fives everybody. And Amanda's like, yeah, and then you have your Nashville house. Lindsay and I still don't have a house in New Jersey. That's crazy. God, it's like life decisions like yours investing your money and doing stuff in mine. Marrying Kyle. God's crazy. That one worked out and one didn't. Cause I feel my deposit down on lover boy. That's pretty good. We're basically living in that. I mean, the walls are lined with it. It's like box is a lover boy after the. You know, they wouldn't have to pour so much out on the grass probably if they weren't serving that.

B (22:46)

Yeah, seriously. So Amanda's like, oh, that's. Oh, Kyle. That's funny. He's like, no, I know, but it's like, kind of outfell. It's like, it's okay. We're good. I'm just making a silly. Kyle. Oh, I'm sure everyone's just, like, totally exhausted by these two. So now it's Sunday. Clean everyone's cleaning up, and they're cleaning up this party, and. And Ben is looking for a clutch, and it's exciting.

C (23:13)

So they're asking him. So. So Sierra asked him. So you're bringing this girl to the housewarming? And he's like, well, we'll see if she wants to. I'll talk to her later this week. Have you been communicating? Well, not really, but I'll keep thinking about it. So her name is Sabr. Sabrina. My plan is to reach out to Sabrina. Hopefully she responds. I don't believe you. You've been talking to her this whole time, you liar. So he's like, yeah, I'm gonna invite her. And I'm just so nervous because, you know, she said, you know, she said, I love you, and then I just ghosted her. I mean, stolen storyline.

B (23:49)

My favorite are are the people who ghost people and then act like they're the victims. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I don't know if she'll like me again because I ghosted her. You ghosted her? You ghosted her? Like, we're not going to feel bad for you. Okay.

C (24:01)

Yeah, but she is a teenage witch, so would she really be that mad?

B (24:05)

Oh, I thought she was a carpenter.

C (24:09)

Oh, sure. The new one tries to take away the witchy, the witchiness. When I go to old Navy now I look at the models on the wall posing, and I'm just waiting to see Ben so I can throw things.

B (24:21)

Yeah. Sabrina Carpenter has a song out that I heard the other day and was like, when did you get hot? I was like, sabrina Carpenter is so funny. She's like, when did you get hot?

C (24:34)

I'm like, I was texting my girlfriend on tick tock and what did. When did you get high? Sabrina Carpenter seems like an older person making fun of younger people.

B (24:48)

I agree.

C (24:48)

Like, she feels like she's parodying younger people, which I think is really funny because she's young herself, but she's like a household, I think. I think she's just fudgeing with everybody.

B (24:58)

I know. I feel like she'd be our friend. Sabrina, if you're out there, be our friend. Okay, so Sierra, like, yeah, our niece. Our niece friend. She does sort of feel like that

C (25:09)

you want to be like, hey, school starting soon. Let's go get you some new clouds.

B (25:15)

I just can imagine her getting onto her bed and, like, she has her little pink phone that would have, like, a corded phone, of course. And she just have her, like, you know, on her stomach and her Knees. Like, her legs would be up, you know, and she'd just be calling you. She's like, auntie Ronnie, how do I tell the boys that I'm hot now? And then I'd call, like, well, Sabrina, I think you should actually, like, focus on some of the quiet, Ben. Talk to Auntie Ronnie about this. And then you guys would talk, and I just sit there and I'd be

C (25:41)

like, even in your fantasies, you're being, like, passed over.

B (25:45)

I'm a third wheel in the Sabrina Carpenter fantasy. I have to admit it. Honestly, we all know she's gonna like you more. Oh, God, Ben, you're ridiculous.

C (25:55)

I love that your fantasies are all about me sliding you in some way

B (25:58)

in a social interaction. No, it's not you sliding me. It's that I just know that Sabrina Carpenter will, like, try to connect with me, but she just won't be able to because I'll be like, so actually, board games are, like, really cool. Like, it's like my last hobby to convert you. Like, you should play.

C (26:13)

Uncle Ben, I'm sick of talking about whisking, okay? I'm getting hot. That's the point.

B (26:19)

I'd be like, there's actually this, like, great new cookbook by Kalu Henry called Better at Home and you should really try. She's like, that's nice.

C (26:25)

Merry Christmas, honey. Open it. I can't wait for you to see it, Galette.

B (26:32)

It's a great cookbook called Galette Galette.

C (26:35)

I don't eat carbs, Uncle Ben. I don't eat carbs right now.

B (26:39)

So, Auntie Ronnie, I was wondering. There's this boy you don't want to talk about the glets, the Galactic.

C (26:45)

I'd be like, I'm sending you birth control. Take it or I'm showing up there. Take it like it's a vitamin.

B (26:52)

Socially, your birth control, but not my galettes. That's fine.

C (26:55)

Okay, so Sierra is still asking Ben questions. She's like, so do you love her? Or you just weren't there yet or you're not there yet? Like, what is it? Is it. I was caught off guard. Well, I think that if you had this conversation with her and we're like, honest, but, like, you. You, like, you have to open the door. Like, it's on you now. He's like, okay, so guys are so stupid.

B (27:15)

Seriously.

C (27:16)

She's like, don't it up here. And he's like, yeah, I got one shot. I got one shot. So she passes KJ's room. It's like, wait a minute. Where Are my tits in here?

B (27:28)

The question one always asks. And Dara's like, oh, I thought you left them on his bed as a prank. I was just gonna leave him there just because I knew it'd make him feel bad. Bully. She's like, no. So then, yeah. So everyone packs up, everyone gets their trash. And Kyle goes, amanda, can I get a hug? She's like, yeah, I just don't understand why you waited until last night to see that. You were sorry.

C (27:52)

Oh, you two, both of you, just off with this already. I'm so sick of both of you. Just shut up. Oh, another thing Dave Portnoy said in that video is, I. Yeah, you know, so these two commanding. Kyle thought, what? What, they're dating or something? I said, no, they're married. I said, what? Why would you be married? Enough. In a fucking shouse in the Hamptons. What the fuck kind of show is that? Exactly. It's been 10 years. Thank you. Thank you for saying what we've all been thinking for 10 years. So Kyle's like, amanda, let's sit down. I need time to think and process if I can be dishonest. Like, Friday. I don't. I don't know what got into me, Amanda. Thinking process. You've walked past me and said you, Kyle.

B (28:33)

I know. And I needed time to figure out why I said that. I needed time to figure out why you made me say that. And I said what I said because I'm an. But I'm also like, I don't feel like you want to be with me.

C (28:46)

Wow.

B (28:47)

She's like, well, we're in a weird place right now because you said you to me Friday night, and you were, like, talking negative about me in the beginning of the summer. Like, the way that you speak to me and the things that you say to me is the issue. And I just really feel disrespected constantly. It's like, I'm sorry our relationship is in troubled water. God, I wish we were at apology dune right now. Be so much easier to do this.

C (29:11)

The only question is, what are we gonna do about it? Because I feel like it needs to be a we, Amanda. It needs to be a we. She's like, yeah. Cause, like, I'm literally stuck by your side through thick and thin, through all the rumors, like, after our first date and, like, through all the yelling and through all the name calling, like, I've been here, but I can't do this live. He's like, yeah, you know what? There's times where I don't think you Care and like, you know, like, would you go into gobbles therapy? She's like, yes, I've been asking you to go. Kyle.

B (29:45)

Just want to announce that the slideshow on my desktop has switched from Ariana to just. It says now. They put up a caption that says, back in the day. This is April 3, 2019. And it's just a random picture of Kyle Richards. And she's looking smugly at the camera like, now who's the worst, Kyle? Not me.

A (30:17)

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C (31:17)

So they hug, and they both just want to feel loved.

B (31:20)

Guys.

C (31:20)

Okay, so now everybody's saying bye, and Carl's like, oh, bye, Sierra. You're my MVP this weekend. Unbelievable stuff, Karma. Unbelievable.

B (31:32)

Yeah, she'll be back. Don't you worry about her. Oh, I hope so. Hey, let's see what's going on with all of us this week in the city. I pass it to you. West, my guy, you're in the mix. So then we see west is in Amsterdam, and he's drinking a Guinness. He's on a layover. Before he goes, he's like. Like, we're in Amsterdam. An accidental layover. I'm just having a nice beverage. You know, I'm cute. And there's ducks and bikers and prostitutes. What more can you ask for?

C (32:00)

So Tuesday Dare is at the pet store with her dog, and Carl and KJ are running outside. And Lindsay's setting up for a housewarming. And so she's in a new place, and she's like, this is like completely transitioning my entire life into a big, beautiful apartment. And I Feel so proud, and it feels really good. And no matter what happens, sugar daddy or not, I've got a piano now, and I'm going to bother everybody with it every time they come over.

B (32:24)

Yeah, this apartment's gorgeous. It's also huge. And I'm like, this is. Like, this is. This is. This is expensive. This is expensive. This is expensive because she has a piano in the foyer. People walk in, and there's a pianist right there. I'm like, lindsay does not play the piano. You know, I guarantee.

C (32:44)

Yeah, she says she doesn't play. She just hires pianist to come play it. I love that.

B (32:48)

That's an expensive, you know, prop for your foyer. I have to say, Lindsay, one thing

C (32:54)

I really love about a person, and especially a reality star, is just confidence to the level of almost delusion, where it's like, I will always be making this money, and I don't give a. I'm getting the nicest apart because I don't have that. You know, I'm like, if I spend this, God, what's gonna happen? What happens if Bravo goes away? What if Ben realizes that he's hated me this whole time? That's why he's dreaming of me being friends with Sabrina Carpenter and ignoring him. Like, what's gonna happen? But Lindsay's like, I don't give a. I live like a rock.

B (33:25)

Sabrina Carpenter on the podcast

C (33:29)

Watch for Carpenters. So, yeah, I love that confidence, for sure.

B (33:38)

The confidence of not thinking about consequences is what you're trying to say.

C (33:42)

Yeah. People are just like, who gives a. I'm spending a million dollars a year on an apartment that I don't own. Yes.

B (33:48)

Nailed it.

C (33:49)

Or maybe she does own it. I don'. But still, it's just like, I will always be making summer house money, baby.

B (33:56)

Yeah.

C (33:56)

So there's a penis there, like we've said. And so everybody who walks in is like, oh, my God. Jesus, this place is so nice. Why are we here? What's going on? Like, everyone. Everyone's very confused. Sierra and me are first. Like, what the Is this?

B (34:10)

Yeah. I like. I like Kyle walking in saying, oh, my God, is this a foyer? Because, you know, like, Manhattan apartments don't have foyers. There's, like, room for foyers, you know? He's like, wow. Oh, my God. Wow. Oh, my God. It's beautif. Wow. This is legit. Look, as a bartender, you look legit, man. You want to serve some lover boy? And Carl's. Hey. Whoa. Big ceilings. Wow. Look how tall those are. It's a lot of Brick and mortar to get those up there.

C (34:36)

So he goes up to Lindsay, he's like, oh, got you a gift. Yeah. Thank you for having me. Beautiful home. I just wanted to give you a little something for the housewarming. So I got you a little something. Oh. She's like, thank you. Is it non alcoholic? It's actually regular. She goes, oh, my God, thank you, Carl. And then I never got anything for Gemma, so I got her this little baby outfit that says, my mom's a bitter whore. And that's why I left her.

B (35:05)

So. Yeah, it's from a kid store in Brooklyn Wall.

C (35:10)

Oh, so she could be a little hipster.

B (35:12)

Yeah. And I think the book will be really cool because she was born in New York and it's a book about New York and you know, the whole thing.

C (35:20)

Yeah. Okay, cool. Thanks for drawing those dots together.

B (35:25)

Yeah.

C (35:26)

She's from New York, so I got her a book about New York. Well, she'll. She can't wait to read this, I'm sure.

B (35:34)

Okay.

C (35:36)

Someday Wuthering Heights. I heard it's a pretty good movie. People from New York, we get. So she's gonna love it. It.

B (35:44)

Well, I got this book because she was born in 2004 and that's. Or 2024. And that was about 40 years after 1984. So I got the book 1984. It's a good, good read. Good read.

C (35:57)

I got a. A book for her so she would understand our relationship before she came into being. It's called Les Miserable Places. Okay.

B (36:04)

All right.

C (36:04)

A lot of books.

B (36:05)

It's called the Opera Film. The Opera. It's about a guy who tormented by his ex and wears a mask. So there you go. Enjoy it. Drops a chandelier on something.

C (36:16)

I'll be back in the seawards if you need me. Okay. So he's like, I'm so touched if she would like, even invite me to this because, like, I was invited on group chat. So maybe she didn't even originally intend for me to be here. But I'm here with a book about New York.

B (36:33)

Carl, this is just a brochure showing the metro lines.

C (36:36)

Oh, exactly.

B (36:38)

Yeah. It's like a novel, right? You're welcome. So the producer's like, well, what did you think about the place? Oh, it's incredible. I'm proud of her. But I will say, when I walked into the house, I saw little pieces of memories. For example, I got Wesley stripes. So hot. And she got the trash can from the bathroom, so. And I think that was his shade. But I'M like, I think she got the better deal. She got the trash can. Like, what are you gonna do with Wesley Stripes? Aside from jerk off to it? I want those stripes. Zebra.

C (37:10)

Wesley Stripes is at home with Sierra's fake boobs on it. So now Kara KJ and Kara Kajera. KJ and Dara arrive, and they're like, oh, my God. Jesus Christ. This is some not. What is this? Is someone passing me champagne. What? And the kids.

B (37:30)

The kids at the adult apartment, you know? Yeah.

C (37:33)

And Lindsay's like, well, it's not me playing piano. I don't know how to play piano. So everybody's saying hi to them now, and they're like, oh, my God, you guys are showing up places together now. Oh, you're a couple.

B (37:47)

And then Bailey and Levi arrive, and Levi's like, okay, I love that they are. They show up. Bailey walks in and just goes right in. And Levi is just, like, closing the door behind. It's like, oh, cool. Thanks for waiting for me, Bailey. Okay, I guess I only have three seconds left on this show.

C (38:03)

Bailey's the only one who's like, do not care about the piano. Do not care about the champagne. I'm here to have a flirting storyline, so let's get to it. So Levi's like, okay, well, I want to hear about last weekend. And Bailey's like, yeah, what? What did we miss? Guys, I want to know, like, how was your first real weekend there, everybody? Dara. They're talking to Dara. And so Levi's like, yeah, I'm so intrigued. So there's like, well, honestly, like, I wanted to talk to you a second, because the only upsetting thing that happened was, like, I'd gotten. And then the energy was really weird, and, like, I went to put my stuff in KJ's room, and he kept staring in the refrigerator and, like, reorganizing cheese. And he was a little bit distant. And I was like, this is how you close your refrigerator door. I almost crushed his hand in it. What a wuss. But then, you know, I just didn't know what to make of it.

B (38:50)

What do I come into this? Was there a sweet green salad? He's like, well, you had mentioned to Lindsay that when I was there the other weekend, that I was, like, alone in Ben's room for, like, an hour. She was like, like, did you guys not go into Ben's room? She's like, no. And then we see a flashback of, like, Dara and Ben's room and Ben saying, hey, have you texted me yet? She Goes, you are trouble. So, back to present.

C (39:10)

I was surprised by this. What did you think? I didn't think Dara was just gonna straight up lie. I thought she was gonna say something like, listen, I was not in his room for an hour. That's a weird thing to say. And I went in to chat with Ben and left. I wasn't even dating KJ Yet. Why are you trying to make something out? I thought it was going to be something like that. Like, why are you trying to make me look bad to this new guy I'm dating? But she just straight up lied. She was like, I didn't go to his room.

B (39:36)

Yeah. And Billy goes, oh, well, I don't know where you were then. I was wrong. It's like, oh. Oh. To be continued. Bailey just takes instant accountability.

C (39:49)

Yeah, I was surprised at that. And I know date DJ Ronnie, KJ and Dara are still together from what we can see. So I guess they got past that. But that seemed weird that she's just gonna straight up lie. I kind of liked it. I was like, oh, Dara, she salts her eggs and she lies. It's a winner.

B (40:10)

She's a winner. Well, that was it for that. So thanks, everyone, for listening. We appreciate you, and I guess we'll just continue to cover this scandal as it unfolds. Also, I can't wait for someone to name the scandal. I've tried to come up with some. Some puns. There. There are none that I can think of that are really good. It's gonna be hard to be scandal, but, like, looking forward to whatever we call it.

C (40:31)

All right, everybody, thanks for being here. We'll talk to you next time. Bye.

B (40:36)

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C (40:42)

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C (40:54)

Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella Etchells. We never miss her. Call, it's Diane. Call. Sunday in the park with Dylan Clark. Big yay. It's Emily Gaultier.

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Jamie, she has no last namey. Sipped some Scotch with Jessica Trotch.

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Kristen the Piston Anderson. Que sera sera Whatever will be will Lauren Sills be she gets a name from us. It's Lindsay D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry.

B (41:44)

Aren't you glad? It's Marianne Arens.

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Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.

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She sure is swell. It's Raquel.

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C (42:04)

Darn skippy. It's Tippy. And our super Premium sponsors. She's VVIP It's Amanda V. Can I have a Kavanaugh?

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It's Anna Kavanaugh. Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD

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we're taking the gold with Brenda Silva.

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C (42:21)

Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses. It's Christine Hogel. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides.

B (42:32)

Who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish. My favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo. Let's get savage With Laura Wildman in the study with a candlestick. It's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron. She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthy Always killing it. It's Lola Al Kalani. Roger that. It's Marla's Rogers the incredible edible Matthew Sisters.

C (43:00)

She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose she's the lady of the house It's Rachel Charouse. There's a chance of meatballs. It's Rebecca Cloud. She's our princess It's Rebecca Prince.

B (43:11)

Maximum love for Sandy Maximoska. She's the queen bee It's Sarah Lemke.

C (43:16)

We cannot tell a lie. It's Sarah Tell of son Shannon out

B (43:20)

of a can and Anthony, please don't stop. It's solely and pop let's take off with Tamla Plain.

C (43:26)

Strike a pose. It's Tori Rose. She ain't no shrinking violet Coutar. We love you guys.

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