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Ronnie Karam
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Ben Mandelker
Who cares what happens when there's so much. That happens? Well, hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker. Joining me today is the one and only, the joyous, the joyful and the beautiful Ronnie Karam.
Ronnie Karam
Hi Ronnie.
Ben Mandelker
How's it going?
Ronnie Karam
Hi.
Ben Mandelker
Hi. Ronnie and I are doing something cray cray in June, which is we're going to New York City and we're putting on a cabaret. It's Forbidden Housewives, a watcher, Crappens Cabaret, a crap array. And it's going to be on June 3rd and June 5th. Two shows. Seating is limited, small, small venue, and a lot of tickets have been sold. So if you want to come join us, the link is on our website and it's also on our social media. So come join us. I think it's going to be a really, really fun and funny time. We're just going to be laughing and singing songs and making fools of ourselves and having a good old time. So can't wait to see all of your faces there. And fun fact, Ben Rimmelauer is the one who reached out for us to do this. And Ben Rimmelauer is also the man who is behind Luann's first cabaret. So this is as authentic.
Ronnie Karam
We made it. Basically.
Ben Mandelker
We made it. We made it. What else is going on?
Ronnie Karam
Come check that out. June 3rd and the 5th. And if you want this video on re if you want this recap on video or you want bonus episodes, this week was Top Chef. Last week with Survivor. Who knows what next week is going to be? Who knows? I don't go over to our patreon. That's also where you get our free weekly blog. Read what crappens and that's really fun. So you can sign up for that for free and that's that. What were you gonna say?
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, I was gonna say I just want to make sure everyone knows this episode of Watch what Happens will not have any stunt cameos by Mr. Beast. So you're a. Okay, you're safe. To all the Survivor watchers out there, no Mr. Beast on this episode.
Ronnie Karam
Why? What's Mr. Beast on? Is he coming on this week?
Ben Mandelker
He was on last night's episode of Survivor and oh, I have to watch
Ronnie Karam
it the next day because I have YouTube TV and it won't show it to me here. It'll show me on my other time zone where I live. So I have to wait for it. So I haven't seen it, but I heard that it's going to be extended because of Mr. Beast. I can't take. Remember that last one with the country western guy and he's like, I'm Luke Bryan or whoever the that guy was. And we had to sit there and watch him talking about spearfishing for half an hour. Come on.
Ben Mandelker
Mr. Beast was much better than Zach Brown. Mr. Beast was not there to be like, this is what I do. We didn't have to watch Mr. Beast to go spearfishing. Mr. Beast introduced a twist and it cost sort of. There's a lot of wax.
Ronnie Karam
Real men spearfish. Why teach them? Why feed a man fish if you could hand him a spear and watch him spear fish? And they're like, oh my God, you're so amazing. Sing us a country song. And he'd be like, my fish. My fish is in a pickup truck. My fish loves that pickup truck. It's like, oh my God, this you're slowly killing me episode.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, that was probably one of the worst moments in Survivor or I should say one of the worst of the non problematic moments in Survivor history is watching 20 minutes of Zach Brown spearfish and talk to us about how important Survivor is in his life. But yeah, last night's episode was two hours, but you could fast Forward over, like, a good chunk of it. Unless you want to sit and watch people bouncing balls on things. But. But it was a good episode. It's a good episode. We probably won't recap it because it was so long and, like, we need to, like, spare our ourselves sometimes with these super long episodes. But it was a funny one. And, yeah, you'll enjoy it. You'll definitely enjoy it. That's for sure. This.
Ronnie Karam
All right. But today it's Southern hospitality. Season four, Episode nine, Sun's out, Shade's out.
Ben Mandelker
And this one is going to be about Maddie's birthday. Last time was about Joe's birthday, but this time it's about Maddie. So let's see what everyone's doing. TJ is making breakfast and sort of feeding a sausage to a picture of Mia. And. And then Lake is at a grocery store trying to figure out vegetables. She's like, I can't have too much cheese because then I'll be on the. And now we have the boys, Michaels, and Brad and Joey bottles, and they're playing golf. And basically they're like, oh, my God. Like, Michaels, you hitting that ball. That's the straightest thing I've ever seen you do. Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
You guys, this is, like, really good therapy right here. Like, going from emo night to golf. Yeah, we're doing it.
Ben Mandelker
I loved it. Like, I'm so grateful. Like, how into it you guys got. Like, that meant it meant the world to me. Which is so funny because I just realized that Joe says that all the time. It's like you giving me that straw right now for my coffee, that meant the world to me. Thank you so much.
Ronnie Karam
About the world. Well, I think I was being a little dramatic about the Whole30 thing because, like, I don't even feel any different. And I'm 30 now. Should I feel different?
Ben Mandelker
My bump, it still looks the same. My skin still is only 22, so being a little bit dramatic, but it meant the world to me that you guys all were patient with me.
Ronnie Karam
I. I know I made a lot of the about this whole month because it's my birthday and Maddie's a Leo, and I feel like deep down, it's like, kind of eating her up that, like, you know, where's my birthday party? So my buddy's getting us on a yacht, and I'm gonna have, like, a crazy pirate themed yacht party, and I'm gonna surprise Maddie with it.
Ben Mandelker
Another year, another booty.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah, I don't know about this. Maddie has probably already told him 20 times. I don't Want to do anything, Joe, for my birthday? I don't want to do. That's what I want to do. But don't you want to do something? No, Joe, nothing. And he's like, we're going to have a giant party. A giant party for Maddie.
Ben Mandelker
Joe, tell me lies. Okay, the sky is red. No, I want to watch Tell me lies in bed all day for my birthday. Oh, why do you want to be told lies in your bed, Joe? It's a TV show. I can't follow.
Ronnie Karam
So now it's time for night shift at Republic. People are partying and M. Mia shows up with a bunch of ladies. A bunch of sexy, sexy ladies. She like, hey, everyone, these are my beautiful friends. What everyone likes to do, hang out with their friends where they used to work, Right, ladies? They're like, yes.
Ben Mandelker
Hey, ladies, you want to meet a bunch of guys in Tommy Bahama? Follow me. Okay,
Ronnie Karam
please do not put us by the older ladies again. Right. Hey, Maya, you want to come sit by us? We're getting sparklers again. Those things are fun.
Ben Mandelker
I was really upset, and I have been upset that all season long we have not seen the Clores Leachman waitress. And especially I'm upset because it turns out that today would have been Cloris Leachman's birthday. So I felt like they should have thrown us a bone today. And also, amusingly, yesterday, what popped up in my social media timeline, because I guess I talk about it enough that the bots have listened and are serving me this important information. Yesterday was the 31 year anniversary of the final episode of Empty Nest.
Ronnie Karam
Wow.
Ben Mandelker
On Twitter. Wow, your algorithm really does know you. Geez. Yeah. It's like on this day in 1995, the last episode of Emptiness ever aired. And then there was like all these people that were like, what is this show?
Ronnie Karam
But it doesn't know you well enough to serve it to you. Like, on the 30th anniversary, it's only this random one. Like, the 31st anniversary.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah. Stupid. So.
Ronnie Karam
So they come. She comes with a bunch of her friends, and Lake is at the door and, like, hates Mia. So she's like, oh, do they have a table? Okay, why are you stressed? Why are you stressed about this lake? It's like, they don't have a table. I don't want to put them somewhere. Mia sucks. I mean, it's like, everybody VIP this way. Whatever, lake, whatever. Okay, okay, whatever.
Ben Mandelker
Mia's like, I have the haircut of the 45 year old Cougar. And so. And you have the personality of a 13 year old girl. So between the two of those things, I'm just gonna ignore you right now. Okay, bye.
Ronnie Karam
And Justin's like, calm down, Link. Like, no, they don't have a table. You're not Beyonce, bitch. Like, typically, when you reserve a table, you're gonna call ahead or email ahead. Don't walk up here in VIP thinking you got a VIP table. This is Republic. So, like, this is real. This is. It's full. Like, we have seen you guys. We saw you drag in eight octogenarians last week.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
Off the street. Please stop acting like Republic is always full. We know. It's not.
Ben Mandelker
It's. It's not. Yeah, Lake is kind of being annoying now. Like, I've been, like, a big fan of, like, for a long time, but she's being kind of annoying now. So Mia's like, I think she's forgetting who she's talking to. I used to be at the front door, and I used to be selling tables. And this job is not rocket science. Le. Like, oh, maybe she forgot because she only worked for five seconds. My. Both of you guys, shut up. I'm not interested in your feud. It's not. It's just not good enough.
Ronnie Karam
Just. Welcome to the bar, you guys. So they're taken inside, and meanwhile, Emmy's in the back, and she's like, what's up, pooky? You know, like, hi, Michaels. Like, you look like you have a thought or two. Like, what are you thinking? Only it's just me. Fun Emmy. It's very. And he just ignores her. And she, like, it is very obvious when Michaels, like, has a problem with anyone. And I, I, I, I, I don't. I don't even know why.
Ben Mandelker
Like, so Michaels tells us, after emo night, I was getting a lot of spam text messages from Emmy, like, freaking out, and, like, oh, my God, like, here we go. And then he's like. She shows this, like, wall of text from Emmy. Like, like, not even paragraphs. It's just one long paragraph. And then there's some attachments and this and that. It just goes and goes and goes. And he's reading. He's like, I'm being, like, goslit and feeling like I wasn't allowed to feel unsave and like, I had every way, every right to feel the way I did. And then she sent me, like, some chat GBT screenshots. And then, oh, my God, I can't even read this. It's, like, too much. Like, it's too much. And Emy's, like, not thinking about how things that she's saying are, like, damaging to Brad's reputation. It's just, like, selfish at this point.
Ronnie Karam
Jeez, Emmy.
Ben Mandelker
God. So she really is a disaster.
Ronnie Karam
I mean, seriously. So you're texting another black guy to what, excuse your micro. Microaggressions against the other black guy? Come on.
Ben Mandelker
She's basically trying to get, like. She's trying to get someone of color to co sign her to be like, see, I'm not racist. Because Lucia said it's okay, and Michael said it's okay, so it's okay, right? It's like, me. Yeah. Like, it's. It's actually staggering how much she's been digging her heels into this. Like, most people on TV have enough media savviness to realize, oh, okay, I should walk away. I should walk away from this dance right now. And she is just, like, doubling and tripling down. And I actually don't even like when people are like, it's because Will and her mom are getting in her ear. They may be, but this is also. She is a independent person. These. This is on her. This is on her. That she has.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah.
Ben Mandelker
Really problematic stances. And it's extremely disappointing. As someone who has been a fan of her in the past, it's, like, really disappointing that she cannot get past this. Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
She learns nothing. Instead, she shows up and it's like, hey, guys, listen. No drama today, okay? I don't want no drama in my life, okay? Oh, God, Emmy.
Ben Mandelker
I learned that from a song.
Ronnie Karam
Start quoting black people now. She's like, guys, guys, guys, give me a break. I sure could use it. Trying to make it to the top. Am I right? It was like,
Ben Mandelker
guys, rock the boat, Work the middle. Am I right? Am I right? Please don't do that.
Ronnie Karam
Guys, I don't want to fight. I'm moving on up to the east side, okay? To a deluxe apartment in the sky. You guys.
Ben Mandelker
Wow. Your accents is really limited to black music. Emmy.
Ronnie Karam
She's like, I went from Mary J. Blige to just sitcom theme songs.
Ben Mandelker
She's like, guys, guys, this place used to feel like home for me. And there's no place like home, doo doo. When your family's around, you ain't never alone. Am I right, guys?
Ronnie Karam
Am I right? So now it's a new day. Everyone's going to their pirate boat. They're all dressed like pirates. And Brad's wearing another wig. He's like, this is my second wig in a week. Like, three days. Like, two wigs in three days, huh?
Ben Mandelker
It's Crazy.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah. This show's really, really killing it. So then at Maddie's, we see Joe bringing her a birthday smoothie in bed, and he's like, happy birthday. She's like, yeah, there's the dog. Or whatever. Yeah, she's a Leo. It's her birthday too. So, like, here's Olive. She's like, yeah, honestly, Joe, like, I felt like it was already the worst day of my life. Like, waking up 9 in the morning, I was like, oh, my God. Especially after your birthday weekend. So, like, I'm birthdayed out. The last thing I want to do is anything for my birthday. I just want to lay here in my bed and eat Uber Eats and bedrot.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah. Or we could go on a boat and you could be surrounded by people engaging in the thing that you swore you'd never do again. So. So how about that? Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
So he doesn't. He. Any intelligent person would be like, listen, I'm so sorry I made a huge mistake and planned you a party.
Ben Mandelker
What should I do?
Ronnie Karam
Do you want to go to the party? Should I just cancel it and tell them to enjoy the boat? Like, what should I do? I feel terrible. But instead he's like, no, you know what we should do? Like, you should get out of bed and then we should just go, like, have a romantic day together, because we haven't spent a time together in a long time. She's like, oh, my God, Joe, that is so romantic. Joe. O. I'll get out of bed if I get to spend time with you. Just one on one time with Joe, which I haven't had in so long. Like, okay, you're making it worse. Joe. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial.
Ben Mandelker
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Ben Mandelker
You know, I'm sorry, I've been preoccupied because I'm just trying to imagine the process, like the, the thought process of Maddie Reese naming her dog Olive. Like Olive is not a crazy name for dog whatsoever. It's some people are just named Olive. But for Maddie Reese specifically, that she decided to name a dog Olive is like a very funny concept to me. The more I think about it, like Maddie Reese finds a puppy. It's like Olive. Like I don't know why. Like I just don't see her naming a dog Olive. I see her naming a dog Avicii or something like as a tribute. But like, I don't know, I like the more I think About Maddie Reese, Jesse, Jess. I think the more I think Jazzy Jeff, it's Big Bopper. I don't know why. It just says, like, I may be alone in this, but if you really think about it, if you think about Maddie Reese, thinking about olives, it's just a funny concept.
Ronnie Karam
Well, it's also a drink garnish. So it's kind of a weird thing for a sober person to name, you know? It's like, just things you're missing, like a twist. My other cat is named Twist.
Ben Mandelker
Rind, Shaker, Pearl, Onion. Wait a second. Someone say Pearl? There's no place like home. Emmy, get out of here.
Ronnie Karam
I'm so excited to have a romantic day with you, Joe. Okay. Thank you so much for that, for not having a party for me. He's like, oh, okay. Well, happy birthday. So on the boat, Mia's like, oh, my God, she's gonna be so triggered when she sees this. Don't let go of those balloons, okay? Please. We do not need a Maddie being triggered over balloons flying away thing, which I'm surprised we didn't see another scene of, because they really love showing that.
Ben Mandelker
They showed it.
Ronnie Karam
Oh, they did.
Ben Mandelker
They showed it. Yeah, they showed it. I think you blocked it out. Or maybe you're distracted by Ali Bali.
Ronnie Karam
I was gonna say someone who could grab hold of those balloons and just fly away. Ali Bali is on the boat. Ally is really trying. I mean, she moved to Charleston. She's doing her best to hang out with this crew and get on tv. And God bless her, she just doesn't. She's just not very interesting. She can't even get on here.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah. Part of me felt like this was a soft launch for her to take over Grace Lily's spot because apparently Bella really is not working out. I didn't even realize that Bella was on the cast poster. It was like, the entire cast looking all sexy around, like, you know, like Leva and everything. And then Bella's there.
Ronnie Karam
I was like, bella, you can't play. Replace Grace Lily with Ali Bali. Like, Ali Valley has the personality of, like, a dish rag, you know, no offense, like a very nice dish rag.
Ben Mandelker
But Williams and Oma. Dish rag.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah. But, yeah, Grace Lily is Grace. Like, you need. There's no replacing that.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah. So Lake is telling us Molly and Mia are just, like, the popular, mean girls that like to think that they run shit but actually know nothing. And, like, my chakras are telling me to stay the away. I'm like, you're the one who came at them. You Guys exhibit things in your personality. And you did this all because of Jordan. She was mad at Molly because Molly advocated for Mia to go on a date with Justin. She's mad at Mia for going on the date with Justin. She's just getting mad at these people all on behalf of Jordan. And Jordan's just sitting there, you know, Girl crying under trees. Is that what you said? Is that what you said a few weeks ago? She's just a girl crying under trees.
Ronnie Karam
Stand at the tree, just give her some sympathy rouge and just watch her dab her face to death.
Ben Mandelker
Like, what are you gonna do? Let her go back to her. Her young adult novel, and you can go forward and have fun on the pirate ship.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah. So Lake is bitching to Ally. She's like, oh, my God, she hates me anyway. And Allie says, yeah, I feel that energy. So, yeah, I feel it. So Mia's like, yeah, I've never seen a girl be so mad at me for, like, no reason. Like, it's ridiculous. Like, what the. And Emmy's like, maddie doesn't even drink. And this is a booze cruise. It's like a booze cruise. It's a booze cruise for somebody that doesn't even drink.
Ben Mandelker
I mean, that was one of my first thoughts. I was like, they're all gonna get drunk on a boat for Maddie. I was like, that doesn't make any sense because Joe.
Ronnie Karam
Joe is just not a very. He's sweet, he's thoughtful in that he's gonna throw a party for somebody, but not thoughtful of, like, what kind of party they would enjoy or, you know, anything. Anything like that.
Ben Mandelker
He's. He's thoughtful, but maybe not diligent or thoughtful, maybe not detail oriented thoughtful, but not.
Ronnie Karam
He's thoughtlessly thoughtful, if that makes sense.
Ben Mandelker
He really is, like, the sweetest guy. We met him at Bravo Con and he was, like, so sweet. He's like, I gotta thank you guys, like, because, you know, like, no one was, like, watching us at first. And you guys really were at our back and, like, it meant the world to me. And he was just so lovely. He's like a sweet, sweet guy, but I think he doesn't know his connect dots.
Ronnie Karam
No, he's not a dot connector. So Michaels is. Everybody's like, she doesn't want this party. Like, why are we doing this for her? And Emmy's like, yeah, I wouldn't kill Will if he did this for me. Well, thankfully, Will will never do anything special for you. So you're. You're lucky there. Okay.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, the if is a big if. I mean, the closest you got was getting, you know, driven around on a speedboat last year, like, under the bridges, under, like, the Ravenel Bridge. So that way, Will could prove to America that he isn't cheating on you. But. Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah.
Ben Mandelker
I don't see Will commissioning any yachts for Emmy anytime soon.
Ronnie Karam
Nah. So they're like, yeah, maybe Joe should just take her on the boat alone or something. Meanwhile, Maddie and Joe are in the car coming over, and she's like, oh, my God, Joe. All summer, we haven't done anything romantic together, so I'm glad we finally get to do something romantic. He's like, yeah, you're gonna love this. It's gonna be amazing. It's just gonna be me and you, and you're gonna love it.
Ben Mandelker
We're gonna go kayaking. Like, you know what's also sad is that, like, why not just lie and say, I got us, like, an afternoon cruise around the harbor, you know? Like, the kayaking is like, you're not even going to. There's not even gonna be a kayak visible. You know? It's like, there's not. You're not gonna get like, there's no kayak.
Ronnie Karam
Sure enough, they start walking up, and she goes, I'm not seeing any kayaks, Joe.
Ben Mandelker
It's like, think it through. Imagine what's gonna happen when she approaches the dock. He's like, no, I think the kayaks are on the other side of the boat. Just on the other side.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah, we're going hot air ballooning.
Ben Mandelker
So you're gonna love this.
Ronnie Karam
We're just gonna go to the boat dock.
Ben Mandelker
We're gonna go on a helicopter ride, but first you have to go to the docks.
Ronnie Karam
So they all hide on the boat to surprise her. And they do. They surprise her, and they start screaming, and they're all pirates. And she's like, oh, my God, Joe. I did not want this, Joe. Like, Joe, I wanted a private thing, like, after your weekend. I just really wanted to chill. He's like, but I planned it a long time ago, so come on, just do it, babe.
Ben Mandelker
I love this show. It's so funny, the stupid things that they do. So Maddie is like. She's like, I do not like surprises. And if there's a surprise, I want to be warned. Okay? Michael's like, oh, my God. Come on, get your booty up here. So they, like, get on there. And he's like, huh, I think I might be walking the plank on this one. Power joke. Yeah. She's like, I really Thought we were going kayaking. I thought we were going to the boat marina to go kayaking.
Ronnie Karam
I don't want to say that Joe Epic failed because, like, I'm sure he put, like, a lot of work into this, but, like, yeah, he failed. He failed.
Ben Mandelker
Don't say that in front of lava, though. Oh. So they get on board, and there's balloons and everything. And man's like, okay, fine. So where's my pirate outfit? Did you get me a pirate outfit? He's like, please tell me there's a pirate outfit. Show. Joe, did you think to get me a pirate outfit? This is my truck. Because I thought we were gonna go back to the truck afterwards. Why did you not put it in your day bag and be like, yes, well, those. Or why don't you have one of. Like, why didn't you have Emmy bring the pirate outfit there so that way she had something to change into?
Ronnie Karam
Like, come on, Joe.
Ben Mandelker
I was honestly thinking about this the entire time. I was like, how's she gonna get into a pirate outfit?
Ronnie Karam
It's like, I'm not gonna lie to you. Like, I kind of understand how Grace Lily feels right now because I'm the only person here not in costume at a costume party. And, like, it's. It sucks. Told you. Nine feet. Dumb Grace Lily just floats by on
Ben Mandelker
another boat, a tulum boat. So Joe's like, oh, God, I'll put this on. Like, a power ranks of how Joe? Up, like, right below the balloons, and I'm about to jump overboard. So Bella's like, that's okay. You look pirate. Enough. Who are you? I'm Bella. I thought you were Ella. No, I'm. I'm Bella. Ella's back. It's fine. Just call me Ella. It's okay. It's. I'm just happy to be here.
Ronnie Karam
She has a point, though, because Maddie does kind of dress piratey anyway. Like, she loves a headscarf that matches her outfit, you know? So the boys are all sitting around, and Justin is holding an inflatable sword, and he's like, this looks like a dick, Justin.
Ben Mandelker
Like, a what? And he's like, yeah, like, tell me when it stops, tj. Because he's, like, putting his finger on to be like, how big is it? Is it this big? This big? This big? And, you know, Michael's like, oh, my God, no. So tell me, like, what's going on with, like, Charlie? And he's like, yeah, I think Charlie's the one. I think I'm gonna propose to Charlie. Really? All right, we'll talk to you in about, like a month. You just got TJ'd.
Ronnie Karam
Charlie told him that she really likes him, but let's see how Dr. Goes. So wait, they're Leos, So that means their birthday. This is like July, right? So when was Southern Charm shooting? That's what I need to know. Like, was she. Was this when she was dating Craig? I want to know the timeline.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, all right. All right, Mark Anthony, I need to know. So Brad is. Yeah, I don't. I actually really don't remember. Well, they had a July. Did they have a July 4th party on Southern term?
Ronnie Karam
Well, they had a.
Ben Mandelker
No, they had a Memorial Day party. They had a Memorial Day party, remember?
Ronnie Karam
So that's in May, right?
Ben Mandelker
So I feel like Southern Charm finished in June. Somewhere in June. And then this show picked up.
Ronnie Karam
Okay, okay, so that makes sense. I just didn't know if I had to fight for Craig because I will not see my innocent little Craig and be cheated on. Okay? Because, you know, this audience, these. The Southern charm audience is vish. Like, they will come for Charlie. They will rip her to shreds.
Ben Mandelker
Something about being bullied.
Ronnie Karam
Sure.
Ben Mandelker
He put. It was like just the other day, it was like, okay, so it was Southern Char charm star. It was in a Forbes article two days ago. He says he's opened up about being severely bullied as a teenager, which he says helped him develop resilience against modern online trolling. So this is something he'll be talking about in his book. So, guys, when you see Craig screaming at a woman every season, just know, hurt people. Hurt people.
Ronnie Karam
He was bullied, you guys. It's really hot being a young, wealthy,
Ben Mandelker
hot, fake lawyer, straight guy.
Ronnie Karam
So hard. So Joe is attempting to put on an eye patch, but he can't do it and somehow breaks it. And they're cracking up. So they're all congratulating him on at least making an effort. And the balloons start mo. He's like, no, no, no, they can't blame the balloons on me. Oh, my God, Please have. Does anybody have proof that I just saved the balloons? Please tell Maddie. Tell Maddie who saved the balloons.
Ben Mandelker
Save the blondes. So they give her some non alcoholic rose. And Maddie's like, 28 motherfuckers. And Michael's like, yeah, no, you're pushing 30. And Lake is like, yeah, she's 28. Like, what are you doing tomorrow for your actual birthday? He's like, oh, she's. We're working at Republic. Okay? We are. Are you serious? Are you serious? I'm DJ fucking Maddie Reese, are you serious? I just turned 28. Yeah, well, because we're going on the trip. We're gonna have fun next week. It's a trip for your DJing, but I'm gonna make it into, like, a trip for me, so get ready.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah. So they talk about planning the trip, and his family's there and growing up, he would go over there in the summer and stay in the houses grandma owns because they have a bunch of mango trees. And Emmy's like, mango trees. Oh, my God, I'm. I love mango, you guys. But he hates her, so he just, like, gives a little pause and just looks at her like. Anyway, back to my. My. Back to my story about growing up in the Doctor. So, yeah, our next. I love going to the Doctor.
Ben Mandelker
I love going to the Doctor. We're connecting right now, Michaels. We're connecting. Right, right, right, right. Doctor. Doctor.
Ronnie Karam
Okay, so the next door neighbors, their daughter and their son used to come in our backyard and, like, steal the mangoes at night and.
Ben Mandelker
Oh, my God, I love that skit on Saturday Night Live. Mango. You want the mango? Oh, my God, it was so funny. Right, right, Michaels. Remember, we're friends.
Ronnie Karam
High five. High five, Michaels.
Ben Mandelker
High five. No.
Ronnie Karam
And my sister was, like, obsessed with the mangoes, and she would, like, fight the girl off because she would come in the backyard and try to steal our mangoes.
Ben Mandelker
Oh, my God, I would do the same. I would do the same, cuz I'd be like, oh, my God, give me my mango. Give me mango. I'd be like, no, you can't take my mango right now. My God, look at me. I'm a white lady talking to a black man. Okay, I can. I can do it. I can do it. I can do it, guys.
Ronnie Karam
He was like, I think the anchor was put down. And he's like, oh, my God, I love anchors. Don't you? Don't you, Michaels? I have so much in common with the community.
Ben Mandelker
Oh, my God. My favorite anchor, Don Lemon. Right, right?
Ronnie Karam
Guys, give me a break.
Ben Mandelker
I mean, please stop.
Ronnie Karam
So they. They all go frolic in the water and stuff. And Emmy talks to Maddie. She's like, Michael is clearly upset with me about something. I mean, like, he's pushing me away. Like, it hurt. Like he pushed me away. It was like abuse. It was like abuse how he pushed me away. Like, I could have fallen over. He tried to murder me. I could have fallen over the boat. I could. I could be drowned right now.
Ben Mandelker
It was. I felt unsafe. He was, like, stalking me with his hands on my Chest. So Emmy's like, I am experiencing firsthand what Michaels did to Lake. He has a bad habit of going quiet, giving people the silent treatment. And I am on a phone dressed as a pirate. I'm on a boat dressed as a pirate. Do we really have to ignore me today? And then they show that she's actually not dressed as a pirate at all. She's just dressed like normal. Emmy,
Ronnie Karam
do you even know everything that went down on, like, Joe's birthday, Mary? Did you even hear about it? And she's like, no. But, like, I did see me and Lake, like, fighting and, you know, going at each other. And then he's like, yeah, I wasn't part of that. But, like, Julia, like, Julia pulled me into the alley. It was terrifying. And just, like, started, like, going at me like baseball bats. There was, like, a whole gang of people back there. Like, they put a bag over my head. I. Like, I was in a warehouse. I was like, where am I? Make a video for your mother demanding money. You know, it was terrifying.
Ben Mandelker
Maddie goes, but the fact that you didn't react is really good. And I say that as someone who has no idea what happened back there. She goes, well, I did. I mean, I called her a fucking cut fitness when she walked away. And the entire night, Michael didn't talk to me at all. And then he sat next to Brad and Julia and Mia and the ent night, like, I don't know.
Ronnie Karam
I.
Ben Mandelker
Like, I. I don't know. Well, have you tried to text him or talk to him? Yeah, I mean, I texted him and I expressed to him. I was like, everything. I was like, why won't you talk to me and please stop making me feel unsafe? And then this is, like, Michael's, and, like, you know, you're like, my best friend, and you're supposed to be, like, a ride or die. Like, you're supposed to protect me, okay?
Ronnie Karam
Protect me. Maddie says, yeah, but, you know, like, I feel like this hits home for him, like, personally. You know what I mean? Do you understand what I mean by that? And Emmy's like, I mean, what? What? And she says, yeah, I don't know how Emmy expects Michaels to defend her when he's someone of color who's also personally affected by this. I mean, loyalty is important, but, like, blind loyalty, like, you just run into walls. Like, no one chooses that, you know? So I'm not doing that. And Emmy's like, you're on my fucking list. My wedding. Like, that's how you treat me. Like, it's like, if I'M saying, like, two plus two is five. It' five.
Ben Mandelker
Oh, God. I feel sorry for anyone who is part of Emmy's bridal party. Yeah. Because the fact that she's like, it's my wedding. If I say two plus two is five, then you do it. If I say jump, you say, how high? I'm like, bye, we're not friends anymore.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah.
Ben Mandelker
Goodbye.
Ronnie Karam
During your wedding, have fun in your miserable marriage with your cheater husband. And Maddie says, wait, but two plus two equals four, right? She. That's my point. That's my point. Don't you understand? Why does nobody understand me?
Ben Mandelker
So then, oh, my God, why isn't Molly. Why isn't Mia a real pirate? Because she has no booty. Haha. And now Emmy is like, well, you know what? I know this might not be the birthday party of your dreams, but, like, we should go downstairs and hang out with everyone. So they hang out, and it's like, oh, my God. And Maddie now is dressed like a pirate because she basically took some tablecloths and turned it into a pirate's hat. And they're like, wow, you did it, Maddie. We did. She's like, yeah, of course I did. Of course I did. So that's the end of the birthday party. It was a fun time, but now it's time to pack for Punta Cana and.
Ronnie Karam
PK's favorite place. Here we go. The Punta Cana, babe.
Ben Mandelker
That's the way you go. Wait, Punta Cana, was that. Yeah, that's where you go. Punta Cana. Punta Punta. So everyone's packing and everything, and it's like, oh, my God, this Speedo, like, it doesn't even have a liner. Like, everyone's gonna see my junk. Oh, God, that's, like, scary. Oh. Like, it's a Speedo.
Ronnie Karam
Him and Maddie talk, and she's like, like, I don't know. Like, I. I originally brought this, like, net top thing, but maybe I shouldn't. No, he did. He's saying, I. I bought a net top, but I shouldn't have my pepperoni nipples out. So they're talking about what they're packing and how he's not talking to Emmy. And he's like, yeah, I've done a lot of, like, realization. Like, I just. I'm not gonna be your bodyguard or your mouthpiece, you know? And I'm over it. Like, I'll have a conversation, but after that, like, I'm having a fun trip.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, I'm Michaels. I'm known for, like, making sure things are fun. Okay, so it's gonna be a fun trap. Commercials. Here comes one right now.
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Ben Mandelker
So now we go to Grace Lilly and Leva and they're meeting up outside of Zachary Zachary's. Although at first I was like, is it called that? Or is it called Zach Zacks?
Ronnie Karam
Zack Snacks. Zack Snacks. To those in the know, it's called Zach Snacks.
Ben Mandelker
Okay, this is going to be an episode where Leva is is going check in on Grace Lilly and Grace Lily is going to talk about her struggles with substance abuse. And I'm so glad they're doing it at a Dakar establishment at a bar.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah, love is like, we will get some publicity for my scene, even if it's talking to you about your addictions.
Ben Mandelker
Yes.
Ronnie Karam
No, we cannot go get ice cream because that's what you do on Bravo when you have an addiction, you go get ice cream. Everybody knows that. But she's like, no, you will sit in front of 37 different churning brightly colored. And also is like, geared towards children. And Grace Lily is basically a child. It's like all these brightly colored things. So anyway, great. She's like, how have you been? Gray. She's like, oh, my God, I'm good. I'm taking it day by day. You know how life is. Life's always laughing. You wake up in the morning, it's morning out there. The sun came up. I said, hey, son, what you doing? Told me to off sun can itself. This is what I say. So what the sun do for me lately? Tried to give me cancer.
Ben Mandelker
You know what Life goes on, but so do we. Just how we do it is no mystery, right? Lava. Anyway, so Lev is like, yeah, well. Well, I didn't want to make any assumptions about what's going on with you, but, like, talk to me. And she's like, yeah, well, it's kind of hard to talk about, to be honest, but I feel louder being more honest about my past. And basically, Grace tells Leva that she is, you know, she hasn't been honest really, about what's been going on with her, but that she has been, you know, dealing with ketamine, you know, abuse and substance abuse, etc. And Lev is telling us that, like, Grace used to be full of sparkle in life and joy and. And all these wonderful things. And then she started a Darkness descended on her. She started become sad or she became unreliable. She got into a fight, they had to let her go. And Grace is saying that she's. Now she's sober, she's doing better. She's not in her bed sleeping all day. She's not depressed. She's sort of like, she's in therapy again and she's on the up and up.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah. And love asks if she's seeing someone. She's like, I am. I'm therapy again. So that's good. Well, I meant dating my therapist. Yeah, it's super healthy. So you're really the first one to know that I admitted to it, you know, like I admitted it to you, and you are the first one to know, so congratulations. It hasn't even gone out on the gram yet, so that's something. Good for you, you know? Good for you.
Ben Mandelker
You're like my big sister, almost like my second mom, almost like my grandma. I mean, you're so old, Leva. You're just like a big old granny. It's like you go to the Natural History museum and you see those fossils, but it's you and you're alive and you run a bar, but you're A fossil. That's what you are. So it really means a lot to me that you met me here.
Ronnie Karam
It's like, huh, okay, Grace, thanks. Yeah. And I respect you. I love Republic, I'm not gonna lie. You know, I love. I miss getting dressed up and like looking cute, walking in there, sitting on those tables, you know, and so if I were to come back to Republic, I really hope we can be cool again, you know. So my schedule. What's my most. My schedule. Like, I can't work on Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, this days and with the day, as they say, you know, but otherwise I'm just ready to go, ready to do this. So let's do this thing. Put some money in my pockets, get some lip liner. Come on.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, I don't think this is a great environment for you unless you're okay cleaning out a daiquiri spinner. But I think, unfortunately, yeah, I don't know, maybe we should rethink this. Hey, I'm getting a phone call from a. From a. That's a potato salesman. Gotta check on the potatoes. I'm just gonna back away from this very slowly. Grace, I let you have a scene. Talk to you. Talk to you later, Grace.
Ronnie Karam
Well, I've got another call coming in. Could you hold on? Listen here, potato seller. You better back off, Margaret. I'm having a conversation with Levis. Stop trying to ruin my. Wow. You know the potato seller. Hell yeah.
Ben Mandelker
So it's my therapist, actually, this is
Ronnie Karam
the therapist I'm so. Love is like. Yeah, I don't know if this is a good space for you to be like, you know, drugs and alcohol and then a bar, Chuck. Oh, but it is, it is. You know, it just wasn't at one point, you know, but I, I can manage it better now and I'll prove that to you. You know, however, you know, however you feel is what we're gonna go with. So you feel like putting me on the schedule? That's great. I'll go with that. I'll go with that. Sure. I'll work there again. Okay. Okay. Twist my arm. Okay, I'm back. Employee of the month. What? Yes. Okay, fine, I'll do it.
Ben Mandelker
You know, I miss you guys so dearly. I miss the group. You know, it's one thing, you know, one thing I kind of do get down and out about. I just feel so sad. She's like, yeah, I saw that you weren't at Joe's birthday. She's like, oh, yeah, and I wasn't at Maddie's birthday and haven't really been part of anything, but I'm hoping I can maybe hang out with some people tonight. Yeah, they're in the Dominican Republic. Like, oh, yeah, I wasn't invited to that, so I'm like, love it. Could you, like, not send her into a relapse, please?
Ronnie Karam
Love is just, like, twisting the knife. She's like, okay, well, you know what? I will save this for you. Card reading. You know, like, I. When I saw you card reading, I was like, whoa. I told everybody. I was like, that is something that Grace should, like, really go after. You know, something flaky. Doesn't actually have to have an education or any kind of real knowledge. You just sit there and make up and take people's money. You know, like, maybe you could do it in a day club. You know, day clubs that just, you know, have random people coming around asking for money. You could wear a headscarf. You know, they could have events. You know, less about VIP and more about the Grace experience. You know, just somewhere where you could just be, you know, yourself.
Ben Mandelker
And by the way, what happened to you and Joe and Maddie? Weren't they kind of like your people? Aren't you best friends? And I'm just like, oh, yeah. So there was this joke. I said that it's kind of taken out of joking terms. You know, where I asked if Maddie ever Joe in the ass, if she ever pegged Joe. So. And I said, I thought I heard that. Isn't he a boy? No, I'm not joking for real. He likes it up the butt. What's wrong with you? Are you in a lavender marriage? Things like that. She didn't really like that so much, so I don't really want to repeat it again because, like. Like, I don't want to hurt their feelings. So it was just something that came out, like word vomit.
Ronnie Karam
Yeah, I don't want to say anything that's gonna make Joe butt hurt, you know, because he's got enough of that because he takes it up the butt a lot. So, you know, I was just thinking maybe keep that between us. And Liva tells the story. She's like, you know, I've always really loved Grace Lily. I remember this one time we had her to a management meeting on Zoom, and she showed up in a string bikini. I just remember texting her and saying, grace, Lily, put. Put a. Put a shirt on. It was, yeah, Grace. Like, I can do this. I can do it. Okay. I can do it. It's like, yeah, well, look, you made a joke that hurt Maddie's feelings. Yeah. But have you said, can we talk? Well, I've text. I've text. You know, I've texted. I reached out, you know, even. Even the night after. Every day. Every day after, you know, I text her. Most of them say, you're a stupid. I'm gonna kill you in your sleep. But, you know, I mean, have you ever worn pajamas to. Have you ever worn not pajamas to a pajama party? It's her fault. It's hurtful. It's hurtful. Yeah.
Ben Mandelker
Maybe just, like, write her a letter. Like an old school letter. Okay. Like Q. No, no, no. Yeah. Like you actually take a paper and pen. Okay. G. No, when. Okay, when I say write her a letter. It's. It's. It's like a. It's a thing that you put in an envelope.
Ronnie Karam
Oh, Lily. G. Lily. That's the Alphabet. Nailed it. Okay. I will accept that. Right. Thank you. You know, it's been over a month since I touched ketamine. And of course, there's, like, maybe times where I get triggered, you know, or I resort back in old ways or whatever. But you know what I do now? I therapize. I journalize. I meditate. Eyes. Hula hoop. Give me a hula hoop. You know what I'm saying? Now, where's that? Where's that? Aa. Hh. Hula hoop. Hula hoop addiction, you know? That's what I got now. It's real good, you know? So, okay, I'll see you at work, Lava. She's like, oh, you're not hired. Okay, see, I will take over. I will. Zach said, grace little is daiquiris here I come.
Ben Mandelker
Doesn't rhyme. So then now it's travel day. Now it's time for everyone to go to Punta Cana. So they are meeting at the Charleston airport, and Emmy is like, I can't wait to get on this flight. We're going to Punta Cana. I want to go to dance. I want to go eat some tacos. And the producer's like. Like, it's not Mexico. Okay. I want to have some enchiladas. Still not Mexico. Fajitas, not Mexico. Gorditas, not Mexico. Burritos, not Mexico. Tacos. You already said that. Still not Mexico.
Ronnie Karam
Jerk chicken is jerk chicken, right? Like, no, that's not Dominican either. And she goes, okay, well, we don't talk about the food.
Ben Mandelker
Good to see that she's spreading it out out in different areas. Different. Like, you know what?
Ronnie Karam
She's not specifically targeting anybody. She's just awful to everybody.
Ben Mandelker
So, yeah, it's all just a big. It's all just a big haze to her outside of Charleston and her experience.
Ronnie Karam
Yikes. So now Maddie is packing, and we see them all get on the plane, and who's upgraded? Who's not upgraded? But here we are. We're in Puta Khan, Punta Cana. So Mia's saying, oh, yeah, I've never been to the Dominican Republic. Like, I'm a Caribbean girl. Okay? Like, my entire mom's side of the family is from Trinidad and Tobago, and I was born there, and I was raised there. And then I moved to Belize with my dad. He was living there, which is why I have, you know, wired that I fight with. I don't know if I mentioned that, but, yeah, like, being different cultures, it's like, who I am. I just. I love it. Absolutely love it.
Ben Mandelker
And Justin tells us, hey, you know what? I've never been to the Doctor, but a part of me thinks that I've been here vicariously because I've had a couple of Dominican girlfriends. I love Dominican food. So it feels right. Being here in Santo Domingo. They're like, you're not going to Santo Domingo then going to San Juan. That's in Puerto Rico. Cape Town, South Africa.
Ronnie Karam
Burrito. Nope.
Ben Mandelker
Zachary's Daiquiris.
Ronnie Karam
Jerk chicken. So now they get into the sprinter van, and Michael's is speaking in Spanish, and Brad's like, oh, yeah, he's going to be showing off this whole trip. What is that, Greek?
Ben Mandelker
Nope, I don't think it's him showing off. Not Greek.
Ronnie Karam
Mexican. Well, that's not really a language.
Ben Mandelker
So then they get like, no one gets it. They're all.00 people on this trip get it. They don't understand what's happening. So Michael says the last time he was in the Doctor was when he was seven, and he's really excited about it. And I mean, goes. It really sucks that Michaels and I aren't, like, on good terms because, like, this is his history. This is where his grandmother lives. This is where he buys all his shirts. You're not at the Banana Republic. You're at the Dominican Republic. Oh, oh.
Ronnie Karam
Side question. Why don't they sell bananas? I mean, you're walking through them all. You want a snack? You see banana, you go ask for a banana. They're like, we don't have that here.
Ben Mandelker
Well, I'm hoping I can show you guys a little bit about my family tomorrow. Guys, I was thinking about doing a thirst trap in my childhood home.
Ronnie Karam
So then they go to the resort, and it's gorgeous. Of Course. And they're like, so, are you guys coming to celebrate something special? And they're like, yeah, DJ Maddie Reese is in the house. Yeah.
Ben Mandelker
It's honestly hard for me to, like, truly have fun until the gig is over. Like, what if I go to press play and I hit pause by accident? What if I go to hit play and I hit stop by accident? What if I go to hit play and I just don't hit play? Or what if I hit play and then it plays properly? Like, it's a lot of things to think about. When I hit play, I have this
Ronnie Karam
dream that I press play and it, like, sets off the nuclear button. Like, what the hell?
Ben Mandelker
Really?
Ronnie Karam
This one up, Joe, you it up.
Ben Mandelker
Joe it up.
Ronnie Karam
So Michaels talks about how this is crazy different because they're in this gorgeous resort. And he's like, yeah, this is not how I grew up. He says, we were showering outside with the hose. Like, we didn't have a car. It's like, my grandma would drive her friends, or she would have her friends come pick us up on motorcycles, and we'd, like, ride on the back of motorcycles and stuff.
Ben Mandelker
And Justin's like, well, as they say in Spanish, Laplaya, like, okay, thank you. You read a word. So then Michael's like, I'm a bougie. I can't complain. I'm excited to be here. By the way, it's best to keep me and Lake separate because I don't need to be breaking up any fights in this trip, even if it's just, like, the. You know, like a cat fight.
Ronnie Karam
So Mia is. They're just. Mia is talking to TJ and Brad about how it's a good group and they're gonna have a good time, blah, blah, blah. And then Emmy is in her villa, and she's like, this is my dream vacation. Like, just you guys, nobody else. Just us and our good friend, local food. Burritos. Cannot wait. Cannot wait. You guys, I thought of a really good idea for this town called the Dominica Republico. Whatever it is, I am gonna bring them burritos. Did you know these are the only Mexicans that don't eat burritos? Like, what the hell?
Ben Mandelker
Did we ever figure out what Domini can do? What? Well, they say, like, Domini can, but, like, can what? Like, what can Domini do? Like, why don't you finish the sentence right? Okay. I mean, we're gonna send you back to Charleston
Ronnie Karam
and the other villa. Mia is asking where Michaels is, and they're, like, joking that he's going to be TJ the whole time. And Brad's like, so do you not want to hang out with the girls? Mia, what's going on? And Molly's like, well, the only person I feel awkward around is Lake. I mean, it's her issue with me that she's created. So I'm good. I mean, I have absolutely no idea why, like, doesn't like me. I don't know if it's because of me and Jordan, if it's because my resolved conflict with Jordan. I mean, emphasis on resolved. At this point, they should make a sport out of hating me. Molly is always talking like, she's got these amazing lines, but they never come out amazing. But she does deliver them very well.
Ben Mandelker
I think Molly thinks in actually, like, the nicest way possible, like, not in an obnoxious way, but I think she's getting feedback from the producers that she's, like, in the center of the season right now. And, like, she's just not. She's like, oh, my God. This. This feud with Lake. Am I right, America? And we're like, sure. She's like, I mean, it's really annoying that I got my ass handed to me for being a quote unquote, bad friend when you're going around to o' sheen someone who's not on this season and shows up for, like, a few seconds in an episode. Am I right, America?
Ronnie Karam
Yeah. And, like, like, called Jordan the other day and was like, people are finding out about Oshin and me and that girl having a threesome.
Ben Mandelker
They're like, what? And so here's the scandal, because it's like, okay, here we go. Mia, tell us everything. Okay, guys, let me get this straight. So a Sheen has a girlfriend, and Lake went home with him, but Lake is mad at me for going out with the On a date with a guy, Justin, who slept with Jordan, like, a couple of times. Not even boyfriend, girlfriend. Oh, my God.
Ronnie Karam
And Justin's like, the absolute hypocrisy. I mean, hello. Like, am I in the twilight zone here? Like, am I losing in here? And Brad's saying, yeah, I mean, she's holding all of you accountable because all of you are bad friends. All of you. But not her. He's like, okay, well, I mean, I guess, like, who has the longest term friends out of anybody running here? Okay, us. Us guys. We win. We win.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah. Serena's crew. So now the DJ coordinator, Juan, comes to meet up with Maddie and Joe, and he's like, okay, everyone, I want to explain about the event. Come on, follow me. He's like, go take a tour. And they look and. And Maddie's just, like, really excited to be doing this, getting back on stage, and she's gonna be, like, floating in the middle of a pool. They're gonna put a little podium up. And she's like, but what about my equipment? Is it gonna get wet? Which is her ongoing storyline. Like, my equipment can get wet, Joe. That's like, every episode. My equipment got wet. It's gonna get wet. It might get wet. Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
So now let's see. What do we do?
Ben Mandelker
Time for dinner. Reservation at 7pm and they're getting ready, and Michaels is gonna put on some jorts. And Justin FaceTimes with Charlie, and he's like, hey, what time is it in Charleston? I didn't even know if there was a time difference. And she. Charlie goes, well, there very well could be. I'm like, you know, there's a way to figure that out. You can share what time it is with you, and then you could share what time it is with you. And if there's a difference, then, you know there's a time difference. But Charlie's like, there could be a time difference. I guess we'll never know.
Ronnie Karam
No way of finding out. And Justin's like, yeah, as a single guy on vacation, be having a field day. But my connection to Charlie has just been so strong. I mean, it's been a week and a half, but her show's bigger than mine, so I'm gonna be cool to
Ben Mandelker
her because, yeah, it's 5:56 type, you know? 5:56, that's that time of day that I think about you the most. Did you know that 5:56, she goes, Really? 556. Yeah. Yeah. That's when I feel the loneliest at 5:56. Oh, God, this guy, the way he is just, like, full of at all times. He already admitted that he pretended to get locked out of his house so that way he could sleep with her. And now he's coming up with this line, yeah, it's 5:56. Oh, I wish I knew what time it was here in Charleston.
Ronnie Karam
Let's go to wacky silly times with TJ and Justin hiding in credenzas. So that's fun. They can, you know, fit in there, which is crazy. And Justin's like, whoa, Is this what it feels like to be trapped in the closet, T.J. how would I know? It's never in the closet.
Ben Mandelker
They don't even do this right. They, like, climb into the credenza, they hide, and then, like, Joe, come Like, Joe comes in, and then Brad is standing there. What Brad's supposed to do is just go to the other room to do something. And then the guy's supposed to startle Joe, but instead Brad goes, hey, look in the credenza. Kind of ruining it there, Brad. That's not how you surprise someone.
Ronnie Karam
Whoa, that was crazy, cuz, Like, I wasn't even expecting it. I'm like, there's no way. Like, you sick. Like, these guys are weirdos. They can get in credenzas.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah. Cuz. Cuz Joe literally. Literally is like, where are TJ and Justin? And Brad says, check the credenza. So he walks up really slowly, and
Ronnie Karam
it's like, oh, they're in the credenza. Yeah, Joe. All right, so now Michael's goes to Emmy's door, and he's like, hey, I wanted to ask if you wanted to go to chat before we go to dinner, because, like, I don't want a conversation across the dinner table. Yeah, let's go on the porch. Okay, go ahead. Go ahead. Oh, my God, you look so cute, by the way. That is so, so cute. Okay, go ahead, talk. You can say anything to me. You can say absolutely anything to me. Oh, well, not so loud. Not so loud. Well, God. Feeling attacked. Okay. All right.
Ben Mandelker
Okay, well, what I just, like, want to say is I think my biggest thing is that, like, I don't want what happened with Lake to happen with, like, me and Emmy, and I just would rather just, like, get on the same conversation. So. Okay, can you just, like, tell me what it is that I did that was, like, wrong and, you know, whatever. And then, of course, Joe interrupts because, like, this is his thing is, like, when people are about to have a constructive conversation or attempt at it, Joe appears out of nowhere, like, hey, guys, just want to let you guys know I got a new bump it.
Ronnie Karam
Guys, I just, like, I. I see you're. I see you're busy. I just want to ask you, does my hair look okay? Okay, I'll be waiting for you in here. Just if you hear spraying, it's hairspray. Don't worry about it. That, by the way, two guys fit in the credenza. So go away, Joe, we're talking. All right, I'll be in here.
Ben Mandelker
Okay. Can I. Okay, I'm gonna talk. Okay, I'm gonna tell you. Okay. This is the story, all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down. I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there. I'll tell you how I became the prince of A town called Bel Air. Okay, Emmy, please. Okay, enough, Okay? I. I'm here. Okay? It's just never, ever, ever been a time that I can remember that I've never once supported you because you're saying I don't support you. I always support you. Whether that be, like, all this you got last year from the whole entire group, you getting engaged. I was the first person you called, remember? And I just, like, being in New York with your fiance didn't show up on stage. I held your hand. Okay. And I wiped your tears. So for me, it's, like, really hurtful that you just, like, disregard our whole friendship the second you felt like I didn't offend you to Brad.
Ronnie Karam
So now everybody else is sitting down at dinner, and Joe's like, well, anyone's wondering where Emmy and Michaels are? I know they've kind of been having, like, some problems, but, like, they'll be here soon. The important thing is they both liked my hair.
Ben Mandelker
It's really important. Really important.
Ronnie Karam
Molly goes, I can smell someone's Axe Body spray from over here. Who is it? Admit to it. And they all just stare at her like, how are we supposed to pick just one? You're in Axe Body Spray neighborhood. I mean, every one of these guys is wearing Axe Body Spray.
Ben Mandelker
I know, but the camera then just goes over to Justin. He's like, hey, why do you guys look at me? So Michael's basically is like, you know what? You know, our friendship should not be reliant on me telling you whether you're right or wrong in the situation. And I've been a good friend to you, and, you know, I hope, like, I would tell you if you're wrong in the situation. I hope you would tell me if I were being wrong. And she's like, okay, well, I took what you said about how this is, like, Brad's his own, like, personal issues seriously. I just felt like, like, invalidated. Am I right to, like. He's like, yeah, you need to stop. Like, whether you feel invalidated or not, you're never going to understand what it's like to be my skin color. She's like, no, no, I won't. I, I, I absolutely. I won't. I won't, I won't. This is making me feel scared and unsafe. I was like, seeing you're doing it again. You're doing it again.
Ronnie Karam
He's like, so you don't know what it's like to be us? She.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
No, I don't. I mean, God. I mean, no. So when situations like this Happen. And I say, drop it. Just leave it. She's like, yeah, but, like, here's the thing. Like, because, like, look, I. I talked to Lucia at length about this because I wanted her to, like, tell me if, like, I've done something wrong. And then she said that his actions were unacceptable. So solved. Case solved. I. I know a person of color, and the person of color said that the other person of color was at fault. So, yeah, what more do you want for me? Yeah.
Ben Mandelker
And, of course, Emmy had. We see a flashback of her talk to Lucia and saying, like, he actively chose to text me, not my fiance and you, to go after me and scare me and be like, sleep with one eye open. And what the hell does that mean? Like, was that. Was that man have his door for me because he's a vengeful man, blah, blah, blah.
Ronnie Karam
You didn't say, sleep with one eye open. Did he?
Ben Mandelker
Not that. What we saw. We saw him saying, like, you know what? You're dead to me, too. Because she said, he's dead to me, and he heard it, and he said, you know what? You're dead to me, too. Like, whatever. But now it's like, sleep with one eye open. He was pounding on the door. I was in the shower. I was naked. It's like. It's. The hysteria is, like, getting bigger and bigger and bigger. Like, she is turning into the lady who harassed, like, the.
Ronnie Karam
The.
Ben Mandelker
The bird in Central park at the.
Ronnie Karam
She's janeting. She's janeting this situation right now.
Ben Mandelker
And I was actually, like, really bad. Like, it's really, really, really bad and scary.
Ronnie Karam
So Lucia. I was waiting to see what Lucia was gonna say, because we see Lucia's face, and she's looking at her like, you're crazy, right? But then she goes, wow, what a violation of privacy. So Michaels, of course, calls. I waxed my nose hairs the other day, and they're, like, growing in and is making my nose. It's so, so bad. Oh, it's making me crazy. I feel like a cokehead over here. So anyway, Michaels calls this, and he's like, well, yeah, she used Lucia to validate her own feelings. And I can guarantee you that Emmy only told her her side of the story, you know? So Emmy's like, there is no micro aggression, okay? Like, and I have a hard time moving on. Like, when a man stalks my hotel room, like, he threatened me. Like, it sent me those two impulsive texts. Like, that was terrifying. Okay? I like terrifying.
Ben Mandelker
So Michael goes, I'm confused. I don't really understand. Like, What's Brad's situation has to do with our friendship? She's like, because I would ride or die for you. And I feel like you didn't. Like, I don't think, like, you understand. Like, I had a panic attack in my hotel room when Brad was texting me. Like, well, was supposed to have a 9:30pm flight that he changed. He changed the flight. And Michael's is like. Michael says the thing that everyone's been saying online, which is this. You feel unsafe and your fiance's in the room. Girl, I would not marry a. That made me feel unsafe. If somebody's banging on my door, on my room, like, am I wrong? And he just stares at the camera. Yes, precisely.
Ronnie Karam
And so he says, so whether you agree with it or not, look, there's a double standard here. Just. I mean, look, I just want us to, like, align our opinions. Because, like, I mean, like, I get when they don't align, it's, like, hard for me. So, like, by line, our opinions, I mean, like, when I say something, I usually say, like, you're right, and then, like, tell, you know, call the police on him or something. Like, is that so hard to ask?
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, right. Like, why doesn't he help me with that? Because honestly, I think that for tonight, I feel like we should just be able to have, like, just, like, go to the table of conversation, because, like I said, I haven't been here in a really long time, and I just want the opportunity to be, like, to connect with my family. So. So basically, he's like, I'm not getting anywhere. Let's go to dinner.
Ronnie Karam
So, yeah, so at first, my first thought was, good for Michaels because he did not end up screaming at once, because, yes, that would have been his third time this season. So I was actually proud of him. Although it is. It is Emmy, and you don't want to get into a screaming match with Emmy because she will win in the screaming department. So he didn't. So I was like, good for him. Like, he's learning as the season goes on, you know? Know. So then we go to dinner, and Maddie is talking about how she's gonna have to DJ at the pool, and she's so nervous. And then drinks start coming to the table, and they start talking about their worst first dates. And Molly goes, yeah, I got hit by a car once on a first date. That wasn't. That wasn't good.
Ben Mandelker
Big trend on Bravo these days, apparently, between this and Rhode Island. So Michael's and Emmy joined them, and Emmy sits down and says, hi, Caramba. So Emmy's like, I'm happy that he heard me out. Like, now I can go dinner and. And, like, at dinner, we can keep this a private matter between Michaels, and I will just keep this very private, and no one's gonna know about it. Then Bella's like, guys, here's my worst date. My date was arrested on Valentine's Day. He was arrested on our date. They're like, wow, that's crazy. Who are you again? I'm Bella. Guy. Guys. I'm Bella.
Ronnie Karam
So then Joe is talking to Michaels, and he's like, what about you? Do you have a crazy date story? And Michaels is very upset. It's like he's moping, and they all see it, and they're like, oh, God, what's wrong, Michaels? Come on, Michaels. He's like, I'm fine. They're like, no, you're not. Obviously. He's like, the one time I try to get through to Emmy, she doesn't hear me. This, like, trip is important to me, but you only care about yourself. And so Emmy not getting it at all. It's like, where everybody get their outfits from?
Ben Mandelker
Mia's like, my outfit's from Cult Gaia. She's like, really? Oh, you're an expensive woman. Whatever, whatever. But Michael's is, like, he's, like, really hurting because he's, like, trying to get through to his friend. She won't listen to him. And, like, it's all I has to be compounded by, like, there's the fact that this is such a sensitive issue about microaggressions. And Emmy, he cannot get through to his best friend about this. It's got to make him feel like. Like, right now, like, it's gotta really be very hurtful to him. And so he's just, like, going through it. And TJ's like, well, oh, yeah. Well, you know, he's. He has a hard time opening up and everything. And so Maddie goes up to pee and Michaels goes with her. And she's like, what's going on? Like, you look like you're about to cry and everything. And meanwhile, Emmy is at the table completely oblivious. She's like, oh, yeah, is that Lioness? Is that not. No, no, that's not Lioness. Is that, like, Runway the label? Like, rent the Runway or the pre order, like, whatever it is, I love it. Oh, my God, so good. She's just, like, in her own world, completely oblivious. That, like, she is massively hurting her best friend because she's being so insensitive to his. Lived experience. Yeah.
Ronnie Karam
And he's crying in the bathroom to Maddie. He's like, she doesn't listen. She's like, yeah, you know why? Because she's Emmy. Like, he doesn't listen. And so he cries in the bathroom. The bathroom. And that's how it ends.
Ben Mandelker
And that's how it ends. Well, everyone. To be continued. We'll see what happens next week on this wacky and silly show that somehow manages to deal with very heavy, serious things, but also be a light, frothy show. We will talk next week about the next episode of this. In the meantime, get your tickets. We got a notification in the middle of our recording that our 7pm Friday show has sold out for the cabaret. So that's very exciting. But guess what? We may just add another one onto it. So we do.
Ronnie Karam
Saturday is really close. Or wait, Friday. Sold out, you said. Okay, Friday. Wednesday is the other show.
Ben Mandelker
Yeah, Wednesday is the other one. We have Friday, but we may be able to add another one onto it. So hopefully we can do that. In the meantime, thanks, everyone and we'll catch you on the next episode. Bye, everyone. Watch what crap INS would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King.
Ronnie Karam
Our way is the the Amber way.
Ben Mandelker
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Ronnie Karam
Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella Etchells. We never miss her call. It's Diane call Sunday in the park with Dylan Clark Big yay. It's Emily Gautier.
Ben Mandelker
Darren McNicholas she don't miss no Trickolus you'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go. We all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no less namey Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's not a McBee she's a McBride. Jess McBride she's our favorite streamer.
Ronnie Karam
Caroline Peacock, Kristen the Piston Anderson Que sera sera Whatever will be will Lauren Silsby she gets an A from us. It's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisalino Fresh as a daisy.
Ben Mandelker
It's Maisie McHenry Aren't you glad It's Marianne Ahrens.
Ronnie Karam
Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.
Ben Mandelker
This is living with Michelle Vivian.
Ronnie Karam
I love Aya. Olivia Williamson.
Ben Mandelker
She sure is swell. It's Raquel.
Ronnie Karam
Yes, we can. It's Savannah.
Ben Mandelker
Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldredge.
Ronnie Karam
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Ben Mandelker
It's Amanda V. Can I have a Kavanaugh? It's Anna Kavanaugh. Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD
Ronnie Karam
we're taking the gold with Brenda Silva.
Ben Mandelker
Let's get real with Caitlin o'. Neal.
Ronnie Karam
Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses. It's Christine Hogle don't get salty with Christine Pepper cat have a meal without the Emily sides.
Ben Mandelker
Who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo let's get savage With Laura Wildman in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthy always killing it It's Lola Al Kalani. Roger. Roger that. It's Marla's Rogers the incredible edible Matthew
Ronnie Karam
sisters She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose she's the lady of the house It's Rachel Charouse. There's a chance of meatballs. It's Rebecca Cloud. She's our princess. It's Rebecca Prince.
Ben Mandelker
Maximum love for Sandy Maximoska. She's the queen bee. It's Sarah Lemke.
Ronnie Karam
We cannot tell a lie. It's Sarah Tell of son Shannon out of a cannon.
Ben Mandelker
Anthony, please don't stop at Soly and pop. Let's take off with Tamla plane.
Ronnie Karam
Strike a pose. It's Tori Rose. She ain't no shrinking violet Coutar. We love you guys.
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Ben Mandelker
Up.
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Release Date: April 30, 2026
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
In this recap, Ben and Ronnie dive into "Southern Hospitality" Season 4, Episode 9, “Putting the Republic in the Dominican.” The episode centers on Maddie’s reluctant birthday surprise, personal conflicts among the Republic crew, and the gang’s big trip to the Dominican Republic—complete with all the chaos, Bravo-style friendships, and classic “Crappens” shade. The hosts highlight the ongoing Emmy–Michaels feud and Grace Lilly’s return, while lampooning the cast’s various mishaps and emotional blind spots.
Mia vs. Lake, and Mean Girls Energy (09:25–11:03)
Emmy & Michaels’ Major Rift: Race, Loyalty, and Microaggressions (11:28–14:21, 59:00–65:45)
On Joe’s Birthday Flub:
About Emmy’s Strategy:
Grace Lilly’s Wisdom:
Emmy’s Cultural Geography:
On the Ham-Fisted Drama:
Maddie’s Post-Party Reaction:
| Timestamp | Segment/Highlight | |-----------|----------------------------------------------------------------| | 05:31 | Joe’s misguided birthday plan for Maddie | | 11:28 | Emmy–Michaels texting saga begins | | 14:21 | Emmy’s “no drama” pronouncements spiral into more drama | | 25:31 | Maddie’s birthday boat surprise (and costume fail) | | 39:36 | Grace Lilly & Leva: Substance abuse honesty and return talk | | 48:17 | Airport and Punta Cana trip launch | | 59:00 | Emmy and Michaels attempt to resolve their rift | | 64:43 | Michaels’ powerful callout on safety and racial double standards| | 68:57 | Michaels cries in the bathroom over unresolved Emmy drama | | 66:47 | Dinner table: Worst date stories, Bella’s police date reveal |
Hosts’ Reactions:
Preview for Next Time:
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