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Who cares what happens when there's so much of crappiness? Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens?
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Well, hello and welcome to crappy hour. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben Uni over there. Hello, Ben.
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Hello, hello, hello. How are you?
B
Good. How are you?
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Feeling great. Feeling great.
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Well, welcome to crappy Hour, Ben.
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Well, no. Welcome to crappy Hour, Ronnie. How's it going?
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Good. Everybody, welcome to the show. This is our live show, bi weekly show where we talk all Bravo headlines and Bravo news. We will not be doing crappy hour until June 8th. This is our last one until June 8th. Sorry, but next week is a holiday. And the week after we're going to be in New York City rehearsing for our cabaret. If you want to stream our cabaret, it's June 5th and June 3rd. There are three shows that you can stream. You can buy tickets for that now. You can get tickets on our website. Watch what crap ins. You can buy the tickets up until showtime and then they won't be available anymore. But you can still stream it for a week after the show.
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So go get some. Go get some tickets.
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Stop sitting on your. Stop sitting alone in your room. Come hear the music play.
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Okay?
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It's gonna be so fun. It really will be fun because, like, Ronnie just played for me one of the songs that he worked on and it was really funny and I'm just laughing. I just think it's gonna be hilarious and it'll be so low rent and so silly and we're just gonna have the best time. So I'm really excited for. So I'm excited to do. To do it.
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I'm excited too.
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And scared. Yes.
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Yes. I'm excited and scared as well. My little Goldilocks. So today. Yeah, on cr. Lots been going on on Bravo. Of course, one of the biggest things was that Bravo caused a stir when they released their announcement for their upfronts. 20:26 Bravo unveils new series Vanderpump Rules, Lisa Las Vegas and Secret Lies Texas Wives alongside several fan favorite renewals, Secret
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Lies Texas and Texas Wives.
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No, there's not even a hand. It's just Secret Lives and Texas.
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No, they bungled lives and the headless Wives.
B
Okay.
A
Yeah, yeah. Gosh, I feel like Bravo. I mean, obviously Bravo has built its brand off of like ripping off the names of other shows, but I don't like it ripping off the. The names of other reality shows that. That are like, less. That are made more poorly. I mean, I really like Super Lives of Mormon Wives or At least the. The season and a few episodes that I watched. It was obviously really good. But, like, I feel like they should be ripping off Bravo. Bravo should not be ripping off Hulu personally.
B
But they have one called Secrets and Wives on Bravo.
A
They did. So they did. Wait, if Secrets Live in Texas Wives,
B
Chicken to the egg. Which came first? The hair parted in the middle or the Mormon? Okay.
A
I would be so happy if Secrets Lives in Texas Wives had some of the cast members from Secrets and Wives.
C
Honey, I'm gonna do an Insta. Max, I'm gonna do an insta.
B
That show was a train wreck and I loved it.
C
You just got lizard.
B
Wasn't that. That.
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I'm paralyzed. I'm literally paralyzed right now.
B
All right, so some of the new shows that they have. Vanderpump rules. Lisa, Las Vegas. Lisa Vanderpump has been ruling over the Las Veg for years now. Has she now? I mean, she's there, that's for sure. But ruling over. I don't know. This is about her hotel, I believe. Right? Let's see now. She is expanding her Vegas empire through the opening of a high profile namesake hotel. In this limited series, we follow behind the scenes dash to make the property worthy of the Vanderpump brand.
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Oh, are they going to install leaks into the ceiling?
B
And will we smell bar rot when we walk in?
A
Just want to know, will there be an oversized pendulum that will swing through the restaurants and you have to avoid it? Like that one America's Next Top Model challenge.
B
Jax is just going to come into your room, snort coke off your wife's ass and steal something.
A
Yeah, it's just part of the experience. Will any restaurant ever be able to aspire to the Vanderpump brand? Hard to say. Maybe the Vanderpump brand is just some boxes and packing tape, because last time we checked, a bunch of the restaurants have closed.
B
Yeah, I don't know. I'm. I'm excited to see because, you know, Nicolaine's gonna be there and she'll be doing the whole, like, oh, I. I love this chandelier, but I'd like to replace it with the chandelier inside of a cage inside of a chandelier, inside of a cage inside of a chandelier until everything's just, you know, box, box, chandelier, box, box, tiny little light in the middle, you know?
A
Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I mean, I'll be, I'm, I'll be happy to watch this one. You know, we both enjoyed the Vanderpump Rules reboot, but notably the Vanderpump Rules reboot was not one of the shows that was given a green light for a second season that was announced. And so people are thinking, oh, is it not coming back? Is it not coming back? But I had heard that it was coming back, so. And then apparently its numbers on Peacock were really strong. So hard to say what's happening, but people are in a tizzy that this is going forward. But not classic Vanderpump Rules.
B
Wait, is it not announced here in this thing? They didn't add Vanderpump Rules on here.
A
It's not announced. It's not one of the renewals. It's jumping ahead a little bit, talking about what's workout renewed and what didn't, but it's not one of the ones. And Ladies of London was conspicuously off the list as well. Although I think that I would not be surprised if Bravo was taking like a little bit of a wait and see because Ladies of London did not get amazing ratings, but it had amazing chatter. So I don't know. I mean, I think that Bravo would be just absolutely foolish to not bring that show back. It was just so good.
B
Yeah.
A
But, yeah, I don't know. I don't know what's happening right here with Vanderpump Rules. I mean, what do you think about Vanderpump Rules as it exists on Bravo right now? Like the Lisa Vanderpump thing and exploring the world of Lisa Vanderpump. Does it still have that same excitement? I'm obviously there's a. We know it doesn't have the same excitement, but. But in a time right now, we're in such a Summer House moment where we're so dominated by Summer House and that sometimes when Summer House is really thriving, Vanderpump Rules seems almost dated. But then when Vanderpump Rules thrive, sometimes Summerhouse feels dated. It's almost like they can never be thriving. At the same time, I feel like, I don't know.
B
I mean, I don't think this is like a real show. This is just one of those, you know, we're going to spend six weeks watching Lisa open her hotel. It's like when one of the housewives gets married and they have like a little minute long spin off thing.
A
Oh, like a three episode.
B
Yeah. I don't think this is like a real show, so I ain't worried about it. But also, it's never been about the Lisa Vanderpump world. I mean, that's a little part of it. But it's always about whatever crazy people you cast. And I don't think this is that. I think this is following Lisa around, picking out, you know, acting like she's designing a hotel. Yeah. You know, going places with Nicolain and being like, oh, Ben. Or not Ben. Sorry, that's my, that's my face of honored. Ken, sit on this bed and see if it's comfortable. I'll sit with you. Oh, it's the first time. Time I've done this with Ken when it's not his birthday. Get it? It'll be a bunch of that, I think. So the next one is very controversial, which is the Secret Lies, Texas Wives. And I'm sorry, but they're not saying. And here, even in this, even in this area, they're saying secrets, comma, lies, comma, Texas Wives, comma.
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Oh, you know, you're right.
B
It's very.
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Maybe that was a typo. Maybe that was a typo earlier in the, in the. The article. And I fault Deadline for not raising their standards with their truly or not
B
lowering them enough to understand a true Bravo title. So Secrets Lies Texas Wives. And then it says in parentheses, wt, which means white. Right. And I don't think it does. And I, I don't know.
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I think, I think, I think the WT stands for what the.
C
What the?
B
Because apparently, and this is just a rumor, this is not announced by Bravo, but apparently they cast Aaron Greez in this. Did you hear that? No, they wouldn't.
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From Big Brother.
B
I heard on Reddit, no New source. That Aaron Greece is rumored to be in this. She better not be, because for those of you who don't know who that is, she was one of the most racist people to ever be on Big Brother. And that's saying something for Big Brother. Okay, that's actually quite a contest. And it got so bad that they had to change a bunch of rules in the way that they did stuff, so.
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But this WT is working title, by the way. I also think it could stand for Secret Lives, Secrets, Lies, Texas Wives, Parentheses.
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Well then.
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Well then
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what?
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So in the heart of Texas Hill country is the picture perfect town of Bernie. Oh, God. Where wealth, beauty, faith and family reign supreme. Centered on a tight knit circle of glamorous women, this series follows their lives as they raise families, run ranches and farms, and manage sparkling social calendars in a town rooted in rodeos and tradition. Behind the polished smiles and Sunday sermons, however, there are intimate relationships and forbidden romances that test loyalties and marriages, jeopardizing the Town's pristine, forbidden romances. Who's that?
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I hope someone's dating a. A cactus. I forbid you Melbatoast I for I forbid you from dating that cactus.
B
Let's see. This is produced by Wheelhouse Spoke Studios. So what the is that? I don't know. I'm going to look up and look and see what they produce.
A
I don't know.
B
I.
A
What can you do? You know, as. As the resident Texan of the podcast. You know what the deal is with Bernie. Bernie?
B
Yeah. City Bernie is a rich town. And where do they make their money from? They were talking about. We were talking about it the other night during canasta that they're having a show in Bernie because it's rumored that there's a Real Housewives of Austin being filmed and didn't. Bravo keeps denying it or they won't. And so I assumed that this was it. Bernie's not Austin. It's a little out. And I was like, we're robbed if it's Bernie. But apparently the rumor is. You heard it here first. You heard it.
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Okay.
B
That they are filming in Austin and that they are centering it around the wife of the football coach at ut and she's really glamorous. I looked her up. She's a beautiful black woman and she's like an influencer and looks like a model. She looks like a housewife for sure. So apparently that's being shot, but I don't know when they're going to announce that. I hope soon, because this Bernie thing has me worried.
A
Yeah, you know, I. I'm very intrigued by that. People are on the. In the comments have repeatedly suggested. Is this also a reference. Is this going to be Bravo's play on Hunting Wives, which I still haven't seen. But that's like. That show was kind of like MAGA Real Housewives, but scripted people. I think that's the pitch that's been given to me. So maybe this is trying to cash in both on the vibe of Secret Lies, of Mormon Wives Hunting Wives. Put it in Texas, because didn't someone. Did Andy say this or did someone say it recently that Bravo has tried to get Real Housewives of Chicago going, tried to get something going on in Texas again. They've been trying different cities and they've just not been able to make the cast work. Isn't that what Bravo says? I feel like Andy said that recently. Maybe people in the comments can.
B
I don't know. I didn't hear that. I did read Francis, the head of Bravo head of Head of chairman of Broadway. What is. What is her? I know I always want to call her Frances McDormand. What is her last name?
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Frances Berwick.
B
Yes. Francis always like, hey, Francis. Hey, girl. Frances Berwick. I do always in my mind she's Frances McDormand. But I read an article that she did, I think it was on Variety last week, and she was saying, oh, you know, the landscape has changed. And, you know, she was Talking about how McBee dynasty does so well and that they are going to start catering to that kind of crowd more. And I started cracking up because I know that's your favorite show, but I wonder. It looks like this is kind of a play in that direction.
A
I just want to reiterate. I am comfortable watching Right Wingers on reality tv. I am comfortable watching it. It's not my favorite, but like, I can watch the McBees, but I'm not comfortable is watching a show that is produced like an A and E show. If it's going to be on Bravo, it has to have Bravo standards of how it is produced and filmed. I. I don't want shitty music cues. I don't want shitty editing. I don't want, like, scripted scenes where it's clear that they just told Muscles McGee to. Muscles McBee to come in and have a fight. Like, they. They're not doing their lines well. And like, Bravo shows are better than those other shows and I watch them for a reason. So, like, fine, give me the McBees, but don't give me the A and E's. Okay, okay. Keep it simple.
B
Don't give me the the mctlcs, okay?
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Don't give me the mctlcs or the mc eights or the McDonald McDisco or the. The mchistory channel, which, by the way, has nothing to do with history. But, you know, it's not.
B
Well, neither does history, really.
A
The Mick Learning is an adult.
B
Neither do our history books. Growing up, I'm like, wait a minute. That doesn't sound right. Well, let me tell you this. Wheelhouse Spoke Studios, who produces the show. It's not looking promising for you, and here's why. Here's what they produce. Buying Beverly Hills, Netflix, King of Collectibles, Love and wwe, Million Dollar Secret. Secret Chef. Nothing but a good time.
A
Wait.
B
Gotta get out. Hype House, Duck Dynasty, the Revival Assembly Required and Last Bite Hotel.
A
So these names, what is. You know, now I know why people are like, how do you watch that show? Because people, like, they think all these shows, all reality shows like this. I need to know What Secret Chef is about, I want. Is this, like, a coming out thing? Mom, I know I've been telling you I've been working on Wall street for the past several years, but I have to tell you, I perfected my flambe. I'm a Secret Chef.
B
No, we thought you were just a heroin addict. Oh, most disappointing thing we've ever seen.
A
Well, I mean, I do that.
B
Why you got that bacon tattoo for your bar mitzvah, darling. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin commercial.
A
So here's what we've learned from people. We've said it before. What we've learned from people that we've met who work in production on the Bravo shows. What they. What they tell us is that Bravo notes them to death, meaning that whenever they turn in a cut of an episode, Bravo comes back with paragraphs upon paragraphs. They inspect every single thing. They're like, why is this shot here? Why is this glance here? Why is it not there? And makes all their lives a pain in the ass, which is good for us. That's actually why I sincerely believe this is why the Bravo shows are so good. And they're very, very careful about their brand and how their shows look and sound and feel. And so I kind of actually believe, even if you do have a production company that is making Duck Dynasty and Secret Chef and, like, Last Bite Hotel and, you know, incredible cockroach killers, I do believe they'll still be able to do the show properly because Bravo won't let them to do it. Let them do it otherwise. But then the McBee dynasty comes along. I'm like, this is USA tone. And I understand the first season was on USA, but we're on Bravo now, and I'm like, no, lower their standards. It was on Peacock. Well, either way.
B
So I think that because it was on Peacock, it was like a different vibe. And then they just transferred that vibe
A
over kind of, and they were like, we don't want to change the vibe, because that's what the show originally was. Okay, you've had your practice thing. I. I just. I know I sound like a stickler, but I really do believe that Bravo puts out the best reality shows, you know, and they. And they. Even Netflix. Netflix does a pretty good job and Hulu does a pretty good job. But, like, you can see the way in my mind, their pacing is just, like, different and just not as good as Bravo. And I just. I hate seeing this network that I love just drop their standards of how to present a TV show and a narrative for something like the McBee dynasty. So, like, secret, secret lies, Texas Wives. As long as you're presented to me the way I have grown accustomed, I'm like, kelsey, please maintain the lifestyle to which I'm entitled to, we'll be all good.
B
Yeah, look, you know, we don't want to k hit in the nuts right before it's come because we love. I'm in Texas, so I love some skewering of some, some Texas people. And we loved Real Housewives of Dallas until it went to complete towards the end. That was a good show for a long time. So we love that one. So, you know, it's not a Texas thing. It's more of a please don't be another McBee dynasty thing. So. Returning series Bravo has ordered season renewals of many beloved docu series, including Housewives of Rhode island, the Valley, Persian Style Wife Swap. I don't know about. I don't know that I need another version of that. Below Deck, Down Under, Married to Medicine, Southern Charm, Summer House, Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Top Chef, along with previously announced Below Deck, Real Housewives of Potomac and New York City, Jersey, and watch what happens live are also included. And Jeff Lewis returns to Bravo was still flipping out, premiering later in 2026. So do you think this is just because this is 2026 and maybe they'll announce more because there's a lot missing?
A
It could be, it could be because. Did they say Potomac? I mean, Potomac's already filming, so they don't even need to say that. But yeah, I, I, I think this is just, this is just it. And sometimes I'm like, are. Sometimes I feel like they leave stuff off intentionally to rile people up and to create chatter about it, you know, see if it. Yeah. They say that Summer House is shaping up to be the most watched summer house they've ever had. They also said that this is. They said the current season of Top Chef is set to be its most watched since season, since the 2021 season, which is a little surprising. But, you know, hey, it is what it is. I mean, I don't know why I'm being negative. It's like, I really like the season of Top Chef. I thought it started off really slowly, but I'm, like, really into it now.
B
I think it's fine. I'm so used to covering it, so if we're not recapping it, I don't pay attention to things the same way, you know, Like, I don't find it as funny. If we're not talking about it. So, yeah, I mean, it's fine. I get bored. I don't need an hour and a half of Top Chef, but I don't need an hour there.
A
I, I. It makes me sad. I mean, the. The dance card is so full for us right now. And as much as we love Top Chef, like, it does sort of break my heart that we can't cover it just because when we do cover it, we do find comedy that's, like, not even there. And then, like, once it's. Once we sort of, like, find it, it's, like, so funny to watch it. Just, like, the little idiosyncrasies of just, like, the way people act and the way they do things and say things. And so I was sad that, like, it just. It just was. We just couldn't make it work this year. It just was too hard.
B
Well, let's get on to some Bravo headlines for the week. I think the biggest story this week has been Bethany Frankel versus Dina's daughter Lexi. That has been hilarious. So Dina's daughter Lexi. I don't know. I don't know why I can't just call her Lexi. Because when I say Lexi, I think Lexi. Oh, Andrea's girlfriend Lexi, or fiance or wife, whatever, but Lexi. So Lexi comes out with some TikTok, and she's like, okay. So I sent. I have a shoe company. I send Bethany Frankel a pair of my shoes. She wears my shoes. She's photographed of my shoes. She posts a photograph of my shoes. But then she doesn't tag the shoes. She says she tags another pair of shoes that look kind of like them that are an affiliate link on Amazon. So Bethany used her shoes and then publicized Amazon shoes and then got the money off the affiliate link. And she was like, you're a fucking weirdo lady. Like, who does that? So Bethany came back with a video where she.
C
All right, all right, listen to me. I'm so busy. Like, I'm doing this in my car, all right? Like, you know, there's some influencer or whatever who has a shoe company and, like, comes after me like, listen, I've said it once. I've said it a million times. I'm under no obligation. You send me shit. Like, I'm under no obligation to do anything for you, okay? That's not how this works. And you want to. You know, you could have played the long game. You're playing the short game right now. You want to have, like, a little attention and have this little video and get Mad at me, fine. But you could have played the long game, you know, because I push product. I'm a product pusher, all right? You should ask Melissa Gorga about her cookies. Like, how many cookies did I push? All right, all right. Like. Like, ask Harry Hamlin about his ragu or whatever. Like, how much of that did I push? All right, I'm a pusher. I'm a pusher. So you know what? You're welcome. You're welcome.
B
And then she hangs up. It's like, oh, damn. Defensive Bethany. That's weird behavior to post an Amazon someone else's shoe, you fucking weirdo. She's correct. You're a weirdo.
A
I. I feel like it is a really weird thing. And Bethany did actually post a video where she was wearing the shoe, and she credited the shoe. This went up, I think. I don't know. She. She posted something where she was like,
D
okay, well, apparently I did.
A
This is two days ago.
D
Apparently, I didn't post this fast enough. Okay, because if I posted up sooner, you would have gotten.
A
You would have gotten the reference to it. I don't know if she actually linked to the other thing, but when she
D
said, okay, keep playing the short game. Congratulations, you've been to Bridge.
A
Well, like is best is. Bethany's best example of success is that she sold more sprinkle cookies for Melissa Gorga. I mean, Bethany, you're better than that. I mean, I know you are. Like, you are still Bethany. You get, like, why is that where you start with, like, the sprinkle cookies, but also, like, her lecturing about how to do business and, like, why. Why? You're like, don't. Don't play the short game. You gotta play the long game, the long game. What happened to your Mark Burnett contract? That fizzled up. That doesn't sound like there was some long game moves made there, huh? You know, everything. Everything with her has been short game, talk show, Shark Tank talk, like, reality show, all these things. Short game, short game, short game. Okay? And like, reality reckoning. Reality reckoning is the epitome of the short game. You're like, wait a second. Bravo didn't go for my pitch. Okay, I'm coming for Bravo. I'm doing the reality reckoning. I'm gonna take them all down. Where's that now? Okay, the short game is. Short game is you're playing the long game on the short game. That's what you're doing.
B
Yeah, it was a mess, but it was funny watching. Watching people just get so pissed off at Bethany and then just Watching Bethany get so ruffled was really funn.
C
How dare you? You come after me. You don't come after me.
B
Who are you? You're some influencer. Get over yourself.
C
Like I'm a pussy. You don't come after me. You could play the long game. You could have won. You could have had successful shoes if you were nice to me.
B
Like, okay, Bethany, okay, I'm gonna buy some Lexi shoes. Damn.
A
She played the. Lexi played the smart game. Like, this was. Lexi learned. Because you know what? No one would have given a shit about Lexi shoes. No one would have known about them. Bethany would have worn them. There would have been a link. There would have been an uptick in sales. It would have gone back. People would have been like, oh, Lexi sells shoes. That's nice. Now it's been in the new cycle and Bethany keeps on keeping in the news cycle. And I guarantee the next video that
D
she puts out will be like, you're welcome. You're welcome. Because guess what? I'm keeping it in the news cycle. So you're getting the sales. That's because of me. So congratulations. Congratulations.
C
You did it.
D
So, you know, you know, I. I expect a free pair of shoes again a second time around because I kept you in the news cycle.
C
Yeah, send me another pair.
B
So Spence T. Graham on Instagram says, it's contradictory.
C
I'm under no obligation to tag you. Then you should have played the long game, because I would have tagged you.
B
Yep. We're pretty much like, does Bethany not
A
remember selling her, like, whole grain cookies in Whole Foods? Does she not remember how hard that was for her and how she was? We saw her with her little table. We saw her on the Apprentice. You want to talk about a long game? My brain is the long game. I've seen your entire reality TV career. We know where you started, ma'. Am. Okay. And you're going to start as someone here is trying to get their. Their shit out, and you put it on and you wear it and you don't even give them credit. You give credit to something else. That way you can get your money for it. With the Bethany who sold her bird feed cookies in Whole Foods be saying the same thing to someone who did that to her? I don't think so. I don't think she would have appreciated this.
B
Yeah, well, it's Bethany. And I was thinking while I was putting the headline up there that it's amazing how crazy Bethany can make us, but she's still in, like, every other crappy hour at least. I mean, she really knows how to keep herself in the news constantly. She really does. She.
A
I guarantee.
B
Did you see the clip where she was. Oh, I'm sorry.
A
I would say, I guarantee. She sends, like, media blasts to page Six every single day. And page Six is like, we got nothing going on. But in the Bethany story, I guarantee that's what it is. And honestly, the crazy part is I'm ranting about Bethany, but I was thinking this morning, I was like, she is such a fucking crazy person. God, I want her back.
B
Bring her home. Bring her home.
A
Yeah. Cause I was gonna say, come back, Bethany. I'm not even joking.
B
There are other people who get the PR person, and they're constantly blasting PR out, and it's just so annoying. And one example is Erin from Real Housewives of New York. I mean, she. Her PR person is overtime. And it's like you're reading something every day in these. In the Bravo news links about what Aaron's doing. It's like, Aaron, you know, bought a new leather jacket today. Aaron's tequilas really taken over her household or whatever. And I'm always thinking, wow, what a good PR person. Because who cares about Aaron? You know, this is obviously somebody just, you know, working for her, plastering the stuff everywhere. But then you have people like Bethany and they're plastered everywhere, but at least they're funny, you know, I laugh. Did you see the one this week where she was on a red carpet somewhere and she was with her new guy and someone. Someone. Someone said something like, and who do I have the pleasure to. Who do I. I might be getting confused with Vanderpump because they both had this moment in the past couple of weeks that some kid was like, so who do I have the pleasure of speaking to?
C
She's like, you don't know me. What? Whatever. If you don't know me, you better ask around.
B
And then she, like, kind of fell as she stumbled away.
A
I didn't see that, but I saw the Vanderpump. The Vanderpump video of that, which was very funny.
B
Yeah, it's like you don't know who I am. Then you better ask somebody, because I've started every restaurant in this town. I've got millions of teenagers, shows, you know, whatever. It was pretty funny, too. But anyhow, she's all over. But at least they make me laugh every time.
C
I'm a pusher.
D
I'm a pusher. I'm a pusher.
A
Benji Fajeel in the comments says, Ben Mandel, Cur is cringe. Where have you been? Like, hello, that's my brand.
B
K. Byrne says, did anyone see Luann's IG post? Basically making fun of Bethany. And someone commented, you're jealous. And the one said, jealous of what? Her ugly chicken salad.
A
Classic. Yeah. So it's good to see that Bethany is still in, like. Like, one stupid controversy after another. Like, it's. It's wild. The sort of, you know, one moment she truly is in a chicken salad fight. Now she is in a, you know, free shoe fight. I mean, it's. It's really sad where she's falling into. And this is someone who.
B
Fun for us.
A
I know. It is so fun. It is so fun. But she did used to have a show on HBO where she would be
D
like, okay, everyone does how you do business. Okay, here's how you be a mogul.
A
And now she's out here getting into fights with like, well, that show is crazy.
B
Wasn't the whole point of that show, like, the whole prize for the show was to be Bethany's intern. Isn't that what it was?
C
Yeah, it's like, be my intern. She's like, you went to yell. Oh, yeah? Then why should you be here?
B
I went to yell, why are you trying to be Bethany Frankel's intern in this rented mansion? It was so weird.
A
Yeah. And they're all standing out there in the cold, and they were shivering. And then she comes out on the
D
balcony and she's like, okay, hi. Hi. Hi.
C
Hi.
D
Guess what?
C
Don't cry for me. I'm a pusher.
A
All right, all right, that's it.
B
I don't want to sing the rest of the song.
D
I'm under no obligation to hire any of you. Okay, bye.
B
I've tagged none of you in this post.
A
Commercials.
C
Here comes one right now.
B
Okay, so Real Housewives of Rhode island is actually getting a lot of news. Blurby headline thingies lately. I've been watching interviews with Rosie and Kelsey where they're dissing each other, and Rosie is saying Kelsey never even lived in, that. She hasn't lived in that mansion for two years. She broke up with a boyfriend two years ago. She's been dating this other guy. She's faking this whole storyline for the show. And then Kelsey really isn't saying anything that coherent. But it's pretty funny watching them diss each other in interviews. Dino was Dino, who is Kelsey's ex, who's inexplicably rich, and I think the son of that famous judge. That TV judge.
A
No, no. Kelsey's ex is the son of the judge.
B
Yeah. Oh, so this is Kelsey's other ex. Because Kelsey did date Dino, right?
A
Well, she, like, hooked up with him, and then he stalked her.
B
Right. So this isn't the mansion X. This is. He's not the son of the judge. This is the one that she hooked up with before Liz hooked up with. Okay, you're right. Yeah. This is Liz's best friend, Dino. Dino is facing life in prison after he's charged with dealing cocaine. My question is, was he dealing it on a fishing boat?
A
Three weeks out of four, Does. Does he know where Carol's husband is from? Tiger King. Wow. This is crazy. So Dino, Okay, this guy, he's like, I the camera in his photos, he's like, I'm threatening you, but I'm also gonna make love with you.
B
He's like, you want to go to the water wall? You want to go to the seawall?
A
Seawall.
C
I got one.
A
So. Wow. So, yeah, he's 48. Wait, this guy's only one year older than me. Get out. I'm just, like, shocked by everything. Candy burris just turned 50.
B
I thought this picture, everybody looking at me. He's like, oh, yeah, Should I murder
A
you, have sex with you at the seawall? He's actually in the left photo. He's definitely doing the Countess Luann mugshot face.
B
Whoa, whoa. Breaking news. Breaking news. Breaking news. Carrie Shut says they found that Tiger King guy. He was alive. What?
A
What? What is that?
B
Did Bethany find him? Do we not know? Because Bethany didn't tag him.
A
That forced me into a Tom Colicchio response. What? He's alive? Is he a mythologist? Looks like this guy who's been dead for 20 years and came back to life is still doing more than my son.
B
Yeah. So, Dino, big shocker to everybody who's been following Rhode Island. I don't think any one of us would have gu that he was a
A
coke dealer from an unknown Caribbean island smuggling it in. Yeah, that. And then all of a sudden, they're on TV and they get rid of the boat, the gypsy. Something is like, you know what?
C
Now that we got a lot of
D
cameras around us, we decided to get rid of our boat.
B
I don't know whys exactly. Well, that's what was happening when they were getting rid of that boat so quickly. I was like, what's this is fishy? That suddenly she's like, oh, yeah.
C
Overnight that we just. We just have to get rid of the boat. I don't know. He told me we gotta pack it up.
B
Like, you sure even supposed to be Filming scenes on here. Because I think this is about to be impounded.
A
I know, but you know what, though? You know what, though? So if this turns into, like, a real. Like a real criminal thing, what I like about it is the idea that, like, maybe Alicia gets caught up into it by accident. Like, Alicia walks in on something, and now the mob is after her, but so are the feds, and she's just on the run because she's the sort of type that would be in, like, an 80s comedy movie. You know, the 80s comedy movie where, like, like, someone's dating a guy, and then she walks in on the guy and the guy's actually like, a mobster, and now she's like, runs off with the bag, and then all the cops are following her because she's got the bag. The mob's going after her, and she's got to figure it out. I feel like that would be Alicia.
D
She's like, I gotta drive out of here, but she has to, like, drive
A
over bridges, and she's really scared.
D
Like, oh, my God, I gotta drive over the bridge.
A
And the car is going all over the lanes and everyone's laughing in the theater.
B
Yeah, that just need a cracker.
C
Oh, my gosh.
B
That's her tagline.
C
I need a cracker. I'm too old for this cracker.
A
She's with a parrot that's going, probably want a cracker. And then they fight over the crackers while they're on the run from the wall. It's great makeup.
B
So in more Real Housewives of Rhode island news, Alicia shares cryptic posts about. About her spouse taking money without asking. Oh, okay. Well, he's not her spouse, but a spouse. So let's see. This is from reality Blurb. The last one was Page Six. So thanks to everybody, we're stealing the shit from before quickly deleting her cryptic messages. Okay, let's just go over the messages. She wrote asking for a friend. Do you think it's okay if your spouse takes your buddy and pays your bill and pays bills without you, and you never see a buddy or you check and then in another message says,
C
ask him for a friend.
B
Do you think it's normal for someone to put your face and use your image and story for a business that you don't see a dollar from?
C
You think that's okay?
D
Asking from a friend? Are you supposed to say the asking for a friend at the first part,
A
or you're supposed to end with asking for a friend? Just wondering.
B
Yikes. So just not going very well for her and her guy, wow. He takes her money, like her housewives money and just puts it into the till and, and doesn't let her control over the accounts. That's nuts.
A
Yeah. You know, you got to be careful. You got to be, you know, because, you know, if, if like she's now got a taste of fame, she's got a taste of empowerment, she's got people telling her, you don't actually have to live like this. And Billy, Billy had a sweet thing going on and now suddenly she's woken up and she's like, wait a second.
D
All those crackers, I've been paying for them all this time.
A
I thought Billy was paying for them.
D
He's made me pay for them.
A
She's woken up and so now watch it. Your. Your days are numbered. Billy. Pizza mama's coming for you.
B
Yeah. One of the comments on Twitter was saying she lives in a common law marriage state. They've been together 10 years. Even if she leaves, she still gets half. And this is what I find interesting because, you know, people are like, well, why won't she? Why is she not wanting to marry him? She says she doesn't want to marry him because he wants her to sign a prenup that says she'll get nothing, basically. And she's like, that doesn't seem fair. And I was pointing out recently that if they've been together long enough, she'll get half if she doesn't marry him. Right. Because it's common law. So I guess that's interesting too, because Kelsey was saying, you know, well, I'm entitled to half of the. This boyfriend stuff, even though I've never been married to him. So I don't know why it's so weird that I'm letting him pay for my apartment. And I was saying, I don't know that you are entitled, but I guess that's true if it's a common law state. And maybe you are.
A
Yeah.
B
Although it was less than 10 years, I think that Kelsey was there. I think, I think the boy went to the nine year mark and was
A
like, see ya, boyfriend's like, yeah. By like an old queen of the bar told me that they were broken up before the season even began. That he was kind enough, quote unquote. Quote unquote, kind enough to let her film the first part of the season pretending like they were still together. And so maybe that was like right before the 10 year mark or something like that. I don't know. Who knows?
B
Yeah.
A
Who knows about these old queens
B
at the bar? Well, yeah, that's what. That's what Rosie's has been saying all over the place. So let's see what else. Brian Pontarelli. That's the cheater. Melty faced cheater of Rhode Island. His rumored mistress, Beth Walker, sues him following his breach of contract lawsuit. Accuses Rula of making disparaging remarks on Watch what happens live. Ma', am. If you are a mistress and you are walking around flaunting your fucking the someone's husband all over the place, you get whatever disparaging Mark remarks are thrown your way. I'm so sorry, but you're crazy now. Soon.
A
Brian is great though, but Brian, Sue Brian. But also, like, this lady is so thirsty, she doesn't even get a photo in this reality blurb article. That's the saddest part.
B
Good for me.
A
I still don't even know what this lady looks like. That's the crazy. I don't know. And she's trying so hard, she's trying so hard to get on our radars.
B
She.
A
You know what she needs to do?
B
She's a happy hour. She's. She's the human equivalent of a happy hour at Applebee's. Just think, think about that.
A
Yeah. You know Brian, the more I look at him, I've always felt like Brian looked like a capybara. But now that I look at him, he sort of has that like Wallace and Gromit look as well. He's like a Wallace and Gromit take on a capybara. Does that make sense?
B
Yeah, it does. Actually. He's wearing a T shirt in this picture with. Here, let me show people this picture because it's hilarious. He's wearing a T shirt that has a crown and it has R and R backwards with the diamond in the middle and it says Real by ruler, real by rule.
A
Up. Isn't she. Doesn't she do like mortgages or something? Like, yeah, he has a. Congratulations, you got a good interest rate. You get a T shirt. It's called RNA Real by rule. It's a. It's a real interest rate.
D
That's what it means.
B
But don't worry, guys. I know you guys are worried about Brian being evil, but do not worry. He's wearing a giant crucifix. So he's a good person. Don't worry about it, guys.
A
Thank God. I just want to show. Here's a picture of Brian and I really feel like this is, this is who he is. He is just actually, it's disrespectful to capybaras. I was trying to zoom in, but it actually somehow made it worse.
B
I will say that Brian does have very nice forehead skin. Look at that. He's been. That man has been through a bowling ball buffer. He's been through it, and it looks great. I'm like, I should. I should have skin like this, you know?
A
Why does his blazer look like the stage or the mermaid number? In Little Mermaids, when all the sisters sing a song in the beginning, they feel like they are all gonna appear on his chest and good. And do, like, some Busby Berkeley mermaid dancing.
B
So, yeah, Brian deserves what he gets, I think. But this lady being, like, rule of his, mean to me. I watch what happens. Yeah, you think? My husband. So what else? Here. Any of these you want to go for?
A
Yeah. The other thing that people were talking a lot about is that Danielle from Summer House and now in the city is pregnant with Owen's baby. Well, it's really her baby. I was really their baby, but they are pregnant. So everyone. Everyone was very, you know, congratulatory to them. So there. That's. That's the big news on that front. I don't know if there was any major. Was there any major. I mean, the other major news on the. On the whole, you know, west and west and what's it called, Amanda Sierra thing, there was just more Jen Fessler stuff. Jen Foster was on Jeff Lewis and of course, was denying everything. Like, wow. Like, I can't. That. You know, Michael Beck was saying, you should reach out to her. You should. And she's like, I don't have a number. I.
D
Well, what am I supposed to do?
A
I don't have a number. I'm still just so amused that Jen Fessler got dragged into this thing. It's.
B
Oh, she was just getting so pissed.
C
I'm stuff sick. Everybody's talking about it all the time. I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything to this girl. Why should I?
B
She's getting so defensive, and Becky was just like, you know, just speaking for the people. Jen, maybe you should make an effort
C
to, like, calm this down and not
B
threaten to sue people.
C
It's like, whatever.
B
So, yeah, I think it's pretty funny, too. I don't know why she's getting so offended. I think that people. I mean, I get that she's married and blah, blah, blah, but her husband doesn't really seem to care. I think that people online are just really mean. You know, they're like, you've slept with that old lady and stuff like that. Listen, Old people are allowed to, too, you guys. Jeez.
A
I mean, Jen Fessler has never had this much attention in pop culture. Like, people are making montages. They are pulling footage. They're doing all this stuff. I mean, the woman has. Has never. Has never been, like, in such a white hot moment. It's. It's crazy. I feel like she's. I think on some level, she's actually really enjoying it. I think she has to. She has to pretend to be, like, offended and horrified because she's in this marriage with Jeff Fessler. But I think deep down she's like, suck it, Teresa. Look who's in the headlines now, ladies. The friend of the friend of mine.
C
If you think I stopped at James Gandolfini, well, I didn't. I still got it, baby.
B
Yeah, but also to have your big, like, sex story come out. Like, oh, Jen Fessler had sex with Wesley the same week that West Wiener picks came out. And everybody was like, that's the grossest weiner I've ever seen. It's like, can you. Can you let me have my moment? You know what I mean? Can we save the West's penis is gross for, like, another week when I'm not, you know, trying to celebrate my sexuality nationally? I mean, come on, Seriously.
A
There was also a story that I really enjoyed, and I don't know what the follow up has been because I saw the video, but is that pk? PK involved in a little bit of a hit and run, A little fender bender. He basically backed up his car into someone else's car, blatantly hit it, and then drove off.
B
Yeah. Was a total about it. Of course. He's like, well, I thought it was, like, the Range Rover trying to tell me that I thought it was the auto brakes on the Range Rover. Please. I barely hit your car. What do you want from me? Sorry.
A
Yeah. Fix the car. Fix the car.
B
This is his quote. I genuinely thought the new Range Rover had automatically braked for me. It wasn't until I got home and noticed the world's tiniest mark on my car that I realized I'd very gently nudged the neighbor's bumper. I went over, apologized, and offered to pay. Entirely my fault. Although, in fairness, trying to reverse while subconsciously searching for paparazzi hiding bushes is probably not recommended by Land Rover. Okay, so in this, he's like, barely. Barely bumped you. You're a wuss. And I have paparazzi, so suck my dick.
A
Yeah. Also, it's not our fault and not the paparazzi's fault. That. That you're, like, looking around in bushes. Okay, sir, safety first. Safety first. You should be so lucky that a paparazzo wants to take a photo of you. Okay?
B
Yeah. Speaking of this classy couple, Doritos is in trouble because apparently she is showing up late for book signings. Huge shock there. Huge shock there. Dorit is not showing up to barnes and noble on time. Chronically late. Dorit Kemsley garnered mixed reviews for book tour signings being held on dorit standard time.
A
Yeah, that's no good. That's no good. You have to show up on time for the people. You're not Madonna, Dorit. Okay? Like, people don't want to actually read your book. They just want to say. They just want to have it and then laugh that they got it. So don't make them wait.
B
I've got news. Dorit is going to be in New York for a book signing at the same time we're going to be there for a cabaret. Should we ask her to do a number?
A
Yes, we should. And then she'll show up late, and we'll. We'll be embarrassed.
B
She'll be in an entirely different cabaret. She'll be in someone else's show.
A
She'll just show up at cats. Guys, I'm here to do my number. Yeah, that's. That's crazy. I feel like Dorita's in no place to be showing up late to her book signings. Okay. Like, I don't. I don't think people are really clamoring to read about. Read unburdened, personally. Yeah, you know, I thought, listen, I really enjoyed to read this season. I really, really did. But, like, you gotta. You gotta show up on time.
B
Well, Dorit's people reached out to us and said, hey, you know, we're promoting Dorit's book. Would you guys like a copy of the book? And I was like, yes, we want a copy of the book. Here's our addresses. And we never got the book. And I was like, this is so dorit. Yeah, we would have been reading it right now. We'd have been reading the chapter. Send it over.
A
Yeah, we would have been. We would have. We would have been burdened with it.
B
But I'll be burdened with that.
A
That. Yeah, I know. So, yeah, that's. That's unfortunate. Now, another thing here. I felt like there was some other really big, like, summer house story, and I just cannot remember whatsoever. But I just seen this headline right here. Exclusive insider confirms if Wendy aseppo stopped filming Potomac after Giselle allegedly Caught her in a lie. And I am very intrigued about what this is all about. So this article from Reality Blurb says a rumor began circulating on the Internet that Wendy had stopped filming because Giselle caught her in some sort of lie. And allegedly Wendy has taken a break after Giselle caught her in a lie. That's the quote which we probably could have gathered from the lead up to that quote which said the exact same thing. And then someone else said that this insider said they felt it was stupid for Wendy to even film and this could hurt her case. Dun dun, dun, dun, dun. So the rumor is false. Well, this is a stupid article. Wendy, I guess, is still filming, so.
B
Yeah, but.
A
But Monique Samuels has also come back and is filming again, according to this insider, which is the real takeaway here. That makes sense.
B
Okay, well, yeah, that's good. Well, it's time to talk to you guys, the listeners. We're gonna move over to chat. But before we ended, I just wanted to say rip to Archie, Shannon's dog, Archie. Archie has passed away. And life on that show will not be the same or life in regular life. God bless you, Archie. We love you, you little ball addict.
A
Yeah, that was so sad to see. But, you know, we love Archie and yeah, love to Shannon and her family because I know the daughters came in from abroad for it and it's so sad. What a sweet dog.
B
Yeah, little Archels. So if you guys want to talk and come on camera, we will put the link up up to come talk to us. For everybody who's listening to this on audio, thank you so much and we will talk to you on June 8th when we return for Crappy hour. Bye bye.
A
Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. She answered the call. It's Adia Paul. Ain't no thing like Allison King.
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Our way is the Amber way.
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It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carlie Clapp.
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Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella Etchells. We never miss her. Call, it's Diane Call. Sunday in the park with Dylan Clark. Big yay. It's Emily Gaultier.
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Erin McNicholas. She don't miss no Tricolus. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go. We all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no less namey sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch.
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She's a total knockout. It's Katie Manock.
A
She's our favorite streamer. Caroline Peacock.
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Kristen the Piston Anderson. Que sera sera Whatever will be will Lauren Silsby. She gets a name from us. It's Lindsey D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry. Megan Burgundy. You can't have a burger without the Burg.
A
This is Living with Michelle Vivian.
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I love Aya Olivia Williamson.
A
She sure is swell. It's Raquel.
B
Yes, we can. It's Savannah.
A
Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.
B
Darn skippy. It's Tippy. And our super Premium sponsors she's VVIP
A
it's Amanda V. Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy and AMD we're taking the
B
gold with Brenda Silva.
A
Let's get real with Caitlin o'.
C
Neal.
B
Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses. It's Christine Hogle don't get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides.
A
Who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish.
B
Have a kebab with K. Rob, My favorite Murdo.
A
Karen McMurdo. Let's get Savage With Laura Wildman in the study with a candlestick. It's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron. She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthy, always killing it. It's Lola Al Kalani. Roger that. It's Marlis Rogers, the incredible edible Matthew sisters.
B
She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose she's the lady of the house. It's Rachel Sharratt. There's a chance of meatballs. It's Rebecca Cloud. She's our princess. It's Rebecca Prince.
A
She's the queen bee.
B
It's Sarah Lemke we cannot tell a lie.
A
It's Sarah Tell of son Shannon out of a cannon. Anthony, please don't stop. It's solely and pop let's take off with Tamla Plain.
B
Strike a pose. It's Tori Rose. She ain't no shrinking violet Coutar. We love you guys.
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Release Date: May 19, 2026
This lively episode of Crappy Hour delves into Bravo's newly-announced shows and renewals, the chaos and controversy surrounding the network's Upfronts, and delivers scathing (yet affectionate) commentary on the latest headline-generating Bravo-lebrity feuds. The hosts blend their signature brand of sharp humor and Bravo insider info to mock and celebrate Bravo’s ever-evolving landscape—highlighting new projects, the future of fan-favorite series, and the week’s juiciest reality TV scandals.
[02:00–05:55]
New announcements:
Vanderpump Rules: Lisa Las Vegas: Focuses on Lisa Vanderpump’s expansion into the Vegas hotel scene.
Secrets, Lies, Texas Wives (WT): Set in Bernie, Texas, promising glamour, ranches, and “forbidden romances.”
Notable Snubs/Uncertainties:
[13:00–17:11]
[17:11–19:49]
[19:49–25:49]
Lexi vs. Bethenny Shoe Drama:
Memorable Moments:
[29:08–39:30]
[39:30–46:44]
[45:30–46:44]
[46:44–47:19]
True-to-form, Ben and Ronnie blend biting sarcasm with passionate fandom, balancing insider knowledge with take-no-prisoners humor. Their playful banter and exaggerated impressions—especially of Bethenny Frankel and Bravo execs—lead to both sharp commentary and laugh-out-loud riffs.
This episode is a must-listen for Bravo fans craving updates, laughs, and irreverent recaps on all things Real Housewives, Below Deck, and beyond—delivered with unwavering love for the messy, cringey, and brilliant world of Bravo TV.