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Podcast Host
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Brendan
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Podcast Host
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Brendan
Watch what happens. Watch what happens. Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens? Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens?
Craig
Well, hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens. This is is part two of a two part recap. If you're like, hey, wait a minute, I didn't hear part one, guys, it's because we put out a lot of recaps. Go back and listen to part one. Okay, it's before this one. Bye. Enjoy the show.
Brendan
Now is the time actually when Daisy, she radios downstairs to the kitchen and she, she's basically, I guess asking about lunch or something. And the radio is off and then Daisy's like, all guests are at the table. And because Ellie turns on her radio and she's like, Daisy, Daisy, galley, what's the update on the guests? Even though Daisy just gave the update, but the radio was off, now she's acting as if Daisy wasn't doing her job.
Craig
Yeah, she's like, well, I'll be down in a minute. Don't you worry about it. We can start right now. Meanwhile, the guests put their, their feet in the hot tub and they're like, oh my God, we said cold. This is hot.
Brendan
This is hot water.
Craig
Okay, so you overflowed it and you turned on the WR temperature on the water. Come on. So now some food is coming and drink orders, all that stuff though Ben is in the galley and he's like, why are they not taking the lobster salad? Guys, radio. Radio. Guys, guys, you need to take the lobster salad. It goes first. It's a salad. And Ellie's like, exactly.
Brendan
So Daisy, who's so annoyed because of all this radio stuff, goes, yeah, well, if you want to do it, you can bring it up yourself or get your assistant to bring it up. Which does not feel professional on Daisy's part, but it was very funny.
Craig
And they all hear it on the radio and D's like, oh, that's not going to be good. And Jason's like, that's not good. So now in the galley, Ben's like, what the is her problem? She spoke to me. Like, it's my fault.
Brendan
Well, I hate the way they speak to me on the radio like I'm doing nothing. It really drives my mud.
Craig
Well, it's not my department because if it was my department, we would have our together. It's not my fault because he did it because I made the lobster salad. It's your fault because you want to eat text too.
Brendan
So Ellie starts to bring up the food and then she's like, where are the girls?
Craig
Not the secret person is here.
Brendan
So she presents the food and they're also happy, like, oh, my God, it's Ellie. Ellie, save us from the hot jacuzzi water, please. Oh, my God,
Craig
I cannot do that. I cannot save anybody from incompetence. We are drowning in incompetence. Did they fill the hot tub up with incompetence? Because they are basically marinating in it right now. Questionable.
Brendan
So then Jenna and Daisy, am I
Craig
responsible for hot tub being hot? Questionable.
Brendan
So meanwhile, Daisy and Jenna are just like, making fun of Ellie, like, like,
Craig
oh, wow, I made the sushi. That's so excited.
Brendan
I made a sushi. And Ellie is like, well, Ben, guess what? They said the sushi deserved multiple Michelin stars. I'm like, oh, yes, this California roll and this spicy tuna roll. I mean, go Ben. And Ellie might as well just enroll in the Boku's door at this point.
Craig
Well, to be fair, I don't know how many Michelin starred restaurants they've been to when they can't fill it. A fish. Still. Still really worked up on that one. So it's anchor time. Lifting up the anchor. There's comment cards I have to fill out. And Ellie's like, I hope Barbie gets a promotion. That would be great. She's been here five minutes.
Brendan
She deserves it would really ruffle a few feathers. You know, as Chief Sue, Daisy can't be promoted. So I think we should demote her and then she might try harder. And they're like, ha.
Craig
Oh, yeah. So Joao hears this because he's walking by and he's like, oh, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. Me being friends with Ben. And I have feelings for Daisy. So trying to navigate with two very hard headed people. It's a tough zim. It's a real tough sim. So now the boat's docked and everybody has to, you know, go smile. And then they're saying bye and they get a tip and we don't get a gardening. I thought it was gonna be like, guys, you know, in my line of work, you plant some seeds, you wait for them to spout, then you shape them into a penguin. And that's what you guys did to my spirit. So here.
Brendan
You deserve all of this.
Craig
You deserve all of that.
Brendan
Or maybe in my line of work, we see a lot of hoes, but I can assure you that you are all top of the year. I don't know, I really. I really peaked when I said the hoes joke. And then I didn't really know where to go with it because, you know, we're gardeners basically. And so hose is what you use to till the soil. Like, yeah, we get it. That's. Thank you so much for the tip.
Craig
Oh, so Jason is reading the comment cards and they're good. Overall, five stars. Incredible. Team Dawning experience. Five stars. Amazing. Genuinely. Such a talent. Going to work on a hose joke later. I'm giving that five stars before I even make it. Pretty good. Pretty good so far.
Brendan
Wow. Wow. It worked out really well for us. So tip meeting. Righto. Charter eight. Okay, so, like, you guys hit all these great things. $23,000 and the helmet. 80. When you go out tonight, this is your time to keep this on your head. Even though the helmet only comes down to your basically a forehead line. But that's okay. Got a very long head. Anyway, look, at the end of the day, you truly get nothing for nothing. And Jenna took the fall for a lot. And I know it wasn't just Jenna. And it takes a few to tango, but only one woman to get a demotion. So that's for sure. So you. Your career is impacted. You. You wear a goofy helmet. There we go.
Craig
And it literally does not take a few to Tingo. That's crazy. It's crazy talk. He's like, all right, we've got one more title left. You know, let's stop. You've got to stop. Thinking about girls. All right, Eddie, let's stop bringing our personal things into the workspace and that's that. And then he's like, no new relationships anytime soon for this guy. You don't have to tell us.
Brendan
I know, right? So then Jason's like, all right, you guys should actually be proud of yourselves, even though you had such a shitty chart. I had to demote one of you right then before. But anyway, the charter starts tomorrow and we've got 24 hour turnaround, so let's hit the ground running. No, Alicia, you don't have to actually get on your knees and slap the floor. That's a. It's an expression. Hit the ground running. Okay, she's slapping the floor and she's pedaling her feet at the same time. Someone please help Alicia.
Craig
Seconds, two seconds, two. I'm running towards the seconds, too. So Daisy's like, all right, interior team, bring your drinks. Let's go to the cabins. And so they get up and go. And meanwhile, Ben's like, I'm gonna read these comment cards. This is a good one. Look at this. Without the crew, this experience would not have been the same. Can you imagine? Just eight rogue charter guests. Of course you need the crew.
Brendan
Idiots. And Daisy's like, oh, by the way, can someone grab the comment cards for me? Barbie, will you go down, please? So Barbie goes to the main salon. She's like, hey, guys, can I please take those? Like, Ben's like, no, we're reading them. She's like. So I tell Daisy, no. He's like, yeah, that's right. She had enough requests. Tell her that. There's enough requests coming out of her. This one's about Daisy. We'll hide this one.
Craig
So she goes back and she tells her. It's like, wait a minute. He gave you pushback? You're kidding me. Well, they said that you had enough requests. Oh, Jesus fucking cries. I'm going down there. So she storms down there like, can you please give me these for five minutes? I want to crack down with work. Crack on with work, and then you can have them back, Ben. He's like, what do you think I want to do, Ben, Can I please have them for five minutes? I'm sure you're not going to start working as fast as we are. I think we can all guarantee that.
Brendan
Meanwhile, Joao is just sitting there. Joao, who's doing his whole, I'm caught between a rock and a hard place, when Ben is clearly being unprofessional here, and he's being really rude and Joash this is the point. Joao should step up and be like, ben, give her the. Give her the. The comment cards. But Ben is. You know, I'm glad you don't think,
Craig
because I would have been like you. No one needs you to cape here, buddy. No one's.
Brendan
No, it's not about caping. It's not about caping. It's just all this, like, oh, I'm stuck in the middle. It's like, actually. Or you can just do the right thing, which is be like, ben, give her the cards. It doesn't even have to be a caping moment. It be like, give her the cards. You know, so. But he doesn't, because he's just being ridiculous about this whole thing. And Daisy is like, can I just have the cards? I just want to have the cards. I'm gonna get back to work. And then Ben is like, no, no. Oh, this is about you. You're gonna love it. She's like. She's like, oh, yes, Because I'm the mvp. Sorry, Daisy. I was the MVP of the charter. He's taking, like, this victory lap because he, like, put out sushi and, like, whole fish that had to be massacred in order to be served.
Craig
Well, that's shocking, considering you weren't for the rest of the season. He's like, well, she thinks the world revolves around her, and it doesn't. Last time I checked, the boat was not cold. Daisy.
Brendan
That's a weird. Weird, like, oh, the boat's called Daisy. So therefore, we have to do everything the Chief sue says now. Yeah, but, like, he. But. And yet the common theme with Ben is that the world actually revolves around him. He's so fragile. He is.
Craig
So I think that they're both ridiculous. I think Daisy's just pissed off at Ben, and so now she's going to make an issue out of every. Like, every little thing is getting to her to a 10, you know, and I don't really, like, who cares? They're sitting up there having a little drink before they start work. It's not like there's going to be anything in the comment cards that's groundbreaking. She can just get them after Ben and be like, okay, the comment cards said, do better on the bathrooms. I mean, it's not that big. Maybe I think it's just a huge deal because Ben. She's just pissed at Ben.
Brendan
Yeah, but rightfully so, because if he had said to Barbie, we're just finishing reading them, and we'll bring them down to Daisy when we're done. Just give Me, like, five minutes, it would have been one thing. But he says, too, she's had too many requests. And like, I'm sorry, I, I have to imagine when you're a woman in a workplace and you're dealing with a pig like Ben and you're dealing with this all the time, and there's clearly like, a boys club that's happening, you know, like, where the guys get upset and her stew gets demoted. You know, things like that. And you're dealing with this as like, oh, too many requests. It's like, shut the fuck up. You know what? Not only now am I going to make the request to get the common cards. I'm making it a priority because it's so condescending and so demeaning to be like, too many requests out of her. That's such a loaded thing. I, I, I feel like that's such a loaded thing to say to a woman in the workplace, because I just feel like women have had to deal with so much from us men all the time that, like, I think Daisy has every right to be absolutely furious at Ben in that moment for saying that.
Craig
Yeah. But he has a right to be annoyed that he's sitting there reading comment cards. And Daisy's like, go get the comment cards for me. They're mine. It's like, it's, it's just weird. They're both acting like children. And as far as the demotion thing, Daisy didn't stick up for that girl getting demoted either. So she's on my shit list for that too. So I think they're just both acting like babies. I'm certainly not gonna say that sexism doesn't exist, especially in this industry and especially on this boat. Like, Ben is a little shit, but I think he was just like, her. Like, why does she get to boss me around? It's like a little boy. You know, they're both, they're just both acting like children, and they shouldn't be acting like this to, to each other in front of the staff either. Both of them.
Brendan
Well, maybe not.
Craig
If I was a parent, I'd be like, you both get in the way back.
Brendan
But also, Daisy was having a department meeting, and she's like, I need to have the comment cards so we can go through this and discuss. And. And now she sends Barbie to get the comment cards, and Ben's like, no, no, no. Tell her there have been too many requests from her. It's like, bro, yeah, all that you did initially. Yeah, all he did, all she did initially was say, can we have Crew lunch at 11. And then that has what has set him off for the past 24 hours. And he's just got to get over it. And he really can't complain about requests when he's going to later on, as he has been all season, go take over one of the guest bedrooms.
Craig
I mean, talk about, oh, God, every time. So I just don't want to hear, yeah, he's a. He's a baby. So. So Daisy's pissed, obviously, and Alicia's like, why would he not give them to you? She's like, because I asked. It's just to push back all that time. Well, I love how she wanted to take them the first time we ever got a mention. God, she wanted to take away my. Basically, this is a Tony Award for being on a ship. Someone likes the breakfast turkey rolls down there.
Brendan
They always talk about the food. And I, like. Ellie goes, yeah. I mean, you're not the general manager. Hotel manager. Chill out. Good hotel general manager. Zing.
Craig
I love. I love that little bit of history for Ellie. Like, you know, that Ellie. The law was really laid down for Ellie in some hotel somewhere. The general manager I know was like, listen here, lady. I'm a hotel manager and I'm not taking the shit from you.
Brendan
Who do you think you are? Bob Newhart in Vermont? Come on.
Craig
What, are you going to wake up and it's all been a dream? Well, thank you for wasting eight years of my life.
Brendan
Okay, well, let me chill out. Hector Elizondio in Pretty Woman. Am I right, everyone, listen here.
Craig
All of the Golden Girls in Golden palace, except for Dorothy. Except for Dorothy, who went away to purge her genetics with a deserving man.
Brendan
Listen here. All the Golden Girls, except for Dorothy, but also, strangely enough, Don Cheadle in the Golden Palace.
Craig
So Joao brings the rest of the comment cards to Daisy. She's like, I don't even want them anymore. All right, let's read them. Phenomenal charter out of this world. Beyond professional. The garden party was amazing and so thoughtful. I was stoked with that one. God, the garden party. You did great with service. The fish was a up. But that's not all my fault, so I'm not going to take that.
Brendan
So Ellie's like, I'm sure that D
Craig
is going to come for us.
Brendan
Sort of like an episode three at
Craig
the golden palace when Estelle Getty went
Brendan
for Cheech Marin and said, why don't you work harder around here?
Craig
I can sense it's going to happen. He's like, I'll be ready for. I'll be ready. I'll be ready to cry and take a blankie somewhere. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin commercial.
Brendan
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Craig
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Brendan
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Podcast Host
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Craig
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Podcast Host
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Craig
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Podcast Host
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Craig
So Joao, Eddie and Betul are in the main salon and Joao's like, do not get complacent. We need to help interior or where we can help them. They're in a good place, but they'll still need some help. Everybody got it? Handsome Joao, thank you very much. Back to work.
Brendan
So they are all cleaning and stuff and Daisy's asking Joel where where Ben and Ellie. And Daisy's like, they should be working. He's like, yes, they should be working. And guess what? Ben is in bed and he's snoring and he is not working at all.
Craig
Right, let's. Oh. So then Daisy and Joao have a moment where he's like, oh. She's like, I was. I'm tired. You were snoring last night. He's like, was I? You snore all night long, lady. She's like, ha ha ha ha ha. Catch yourself. And then you stop yourself. It's so cute. Oh, that's going to be cute until about six months into this relationship. And then you're going to be envisioning ways for each other to die. So snoring works.
Brendan
You're need one of those. What do you call those machines? Oh, I'm blanking on the name.
Craig
Cpap.
Brendan
Cpaps. Cpap.
Craig
That's not much better than you're sleeping next to.
Brendan
That's Vader. Yeah, it's nice white noise. So Daisy, I'm advocating for CPAPs did that was time for a final preference Sheet of the meeting. All right, everyone, here we go. Charter nine. Well, we've thrown a lot of gays at this cast all season long. Pretty much every chart has been some games, really. And they've all been really lovely season.
Craig
Really.
Brendan
It really is. They've all been very lovely. So they haven't irritated you the way that we were hoping that they would. So we decided to go back to an oldie but a goodie. Please welcome back returning below deck nuisance, Brandon. So I think this is like his third time being on this.
Craig
No one gay is this season. So we're sending you the worst gay of all time, Brandon.
Brendan
He tried to make an appearance on Potomac, but that didn't really work out. So he's back here. And Brandon, Brandon is back.
Craig
You gotta hand it to this guy. He tries and he tries hard. Very hard.
Brendan
Yep, yep, he is back. So I really do think this is his third time being on the boat. At least. At least.
Craig
Yeah, he's around all the fucking time. My God. So we see Brandon in his home scenes and he's with his friend Carmen. And they're walking into the steak. They're going to the steak restaurant, like dressed like they're going to the Oscars and just like waving at people as they come in. They're like, oh my God. Hi. Medium rare today. I knew it. Bobby, good to see you. Hi, Mr. Mayor. Hi. Yeah, I know. I don't approve of that sprinkler law. What is it, an orange day? I can't.
Brendan
And it's like so like it's. It's so like that region in terms of like the restaurants. From what we've seen on Potomac, every restaurant they go in looks like the back of my little set here. There's always like some sort of like fuchsia lighting element. Like there's an accent light behind like a white curtain. Usually. I feel like every time the women of Potomac go to a restaurant, there's always a sheer curtain with a purple light coming from below it. It's very circoded. And like I said, also my room currently, but I'm also not a restaurant. I'm allowed to have it in my room. And it's okay, but I just think it's so funny as they go to this restaurant with like the purple lighting as usual. And he's saying how he'. Like, like I am like a top selling real estate agent. I also host nightlife events. And Carmen's like, yeah, we're the perfect pair. We travel together. We can do everything but have Sex. We do, of course, love looking fabulous. And if we're gonna travel, we're gonna travel well and on a budget, which is why we go on below deck. And if we're gonna go out and eat, we're gonna eat well. And actually, I mean, he's a child. He likes chicken fingers and French fries. So I'll eat well, yeah. He goes, yeah.
Craig
The two of us. I mean, we are the energy, right? I mean, you got his neck breaks caught, probably to put themselves out of misery. So annoying. So Jason's like, well, joining Brandon and Common are their friends. Lena, Pat, Dina, Libby, Gina, Anna, Pina. Every other name's gonna rhyme with Lena.
Brendan
That's how the gays. I'm sorry, Sheena, you're not allowed on this. Really?
Craig
But even this is allowed, right? God, nobody requested you back here.
Brendan
She's just gonna go on a ferry somewhere. Well, I couldn't go.
Craig
You got any comment cards? Snake's hot dog was a little dry.
Brendan
They wouldn't allow me on. They wouldn't allow me on a yacht, so I went to a ferry instead. So Daisy's like, how are these Charger guests? Last time Jesse goes, well, the primary, I nearly kicked him off the boat. And we see that famous episode where he went swimming.
Craig
And like, what do you mean, I can't go swimming? Fine, I'm gonna go swimming. I'm swimming. It's a funny batch.
Brendan
She's like, say a lot of time. Come back. Well, they're genuinely really nice people, and. But they do like their drinking. And we feel like you as a crew are this close to really snapping. And we thought, let's see if we can get there.
Craig
Right. All right, well, Brandon would lock a Seven Deadly Sins inspired evening. Who chooses that? What are we? Why is. Why are the gays so biblical? We just had Garden of Eden, and now we have another group of gays and are bringing the Bible back in again. Can we stop? What is wrong with us?
Brendan
Shouldn't it be like Noah's Ark because you're halfway there to the decor?
Craig
No, because they only allow two of each animal.
Brendan
What about Jonas and the whale? And that way they can throw someone overboard. Jonah and the whale. Is it Jonah or Jonah? No, Jonah.
Craig
Yeah.
Brendan
Jonas is a brother, so Jason's reading Patrick's requirement, so I'm a simple guy. I only like burgers, pizza, pasta, French fries, chicken nuggets, and everything has to be plain. So glad he's spending all this money to come onto a yacht. Yeah, he could go to a drive
Craig
through Ben's like, what a nightmare. Oh, just you wait, sir. So people clean the boat, and then we go to Daisy and Joao, and she's still fuming about the Ellie possibly being promoted thing. And she's like, well, he says, I'll let him do it. Just let him do it. She's like, yeah. Unfortunately, it affects me directly. So, you know, she's gonna be sous chef, and then she's gonna insist on standing in line in front of everybody else while we greet people for one more charter that's gonna directly affect.
Brendan
Do you know that if I have to. If I have to step six inches down the line, that could affect everything. Sun could get in my eyes. I could get blinded. I could fall off the pier. I could die. I could get drowned. I could get stung by a stingray like Steve Irwin. All because I had to stand six feet. Six feet away than I wear from I normally stand.
Craig
Yeah. And he's like, bro, don't. She goes, are you gonna back me up? He's like, don't say it like that. I back you up if it's warranted, you. You know. But everything you do is warranted, right? My little Snorri. Snorri.
Brendan
Meanwhile, the tool is in the crew mess, and she's just playing with her belly button. And Ben's like, what are you doing? She's like, I have to play with my belly button. Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.
Craig
So now we get another little fight over that rainbow penis thing. And the girl's like, that's mine. Now it's mine. Now it's mine. And now Barbie and Ellie are talking, and they're like, we love each other. I love you. I love you, too. Wouldn't it be weird if I just had to hang out with Jenna the whole time? Oh, she's actually grown on me a little. And she's like, yeah. Or Barbie says that. And Ellie's like, yeah, I think. I think Jenna's trying to redeem herself. That's why she's so nice to everybody. Wasn't that what you're doing? And isn't that the way to do it? What's wrong with that?
Brendan
See, if we'd had. If we had had four more charters, this relationship, this friendship would be done. So because Barbie would become friends with Jenna and then Ellie would have a fit and.
Craig
Yeah, she's testing the water.
Brendan
Chaos.
Craig
She's definitely testing the water. Like, well, you know, I kind of like her, y'.
Brendan
All.
Craig
So when people who are jerks suddenly start being nice
Brendan
yeah. So then it's time for dinner. They go out to Foxy Jacks, which is basically right there in the pier. And Ben and Barbie are seated across from each other. And the way it is is this big group table is like actually several tables pushed together. So they. They toast to meeting each other. They're being sort of flirty. And meanwhile, Alicia sits next to Joao, and Joao's like, well, something I heard from you today when you were talking to Barbie, and you were like, right, we're gonna do this and we're gonna go get to the room, so I'm gonna do this. And she was like, yes, yes, yes. And I was like, oh, yeah, she's grown. Honestly. You have. Okay, now you just put a Shirley Temple on your forehead. Why are you trying to balance a Shirley Temple in this restaurant? Never mind. I take everything back.
Craig
Do well. Wow, look at you. You were giving orders today. You've really grown. Oh, please. She's been giving orders the whole time. She just doesn't know how to do the orders.
Brendan
She doesn't know how to be getting orders. She's been giving orders. It just so happens she's been giving orders to a bottle of Canada Dry. And it's so. It's just been ineffective. But, you know. Yeah, you know, she's learning.
Craig
She's like, I've been like this the whole time, though. So then Eddie and Ellie are talking, and Eddie's like, how are things with you and Daisy? Because I know there's been some, like, tension there. Oh, it's one sided because I don't have an issue with Daisy. Whatever. You have a problem, come talk to me. If not, let's move on. Come on, move it along.
Brendan
Yes, a very one sided issue. I. That's what I detect when I watch this. I'm like, look at Ellie being very chill about the things that Daisy's doing
Craig
so behind Ellie's or Daisy's back at all and riling Ben up. Every time I'm supporting Ben, she's just like one of those. She's acting like Rod, I'm. This is so old. But she's acting like Roz from 9 to 5. The one he just follows the boss around and kisses his ass like, oh, shut up, Roz.
Brendan
Oh, I was really hoping you were going to say Roz from Night Court.
Craig
No, not the same vibe, but definitely from 9 to 5.
Brendan
She doesn't really have a Marcia, whatever her last name was. Okay, I've reached the limits of my sitcom references for today. If it's Marshall's by the way, if it's Marsha Warfield. Marsha Warfield. Marsha Warfield's birthday today, I feel like it's gonna be. This is a special. I have to go look up birthdays now. I'm sorry. You keep talking.
Craig
Look at Marcia.
Brendan
May 26th. I'm saying what. There's got to be a sitcom character who is person.
Craig
Her birthday was March 5, 1954, so it's not that far away. But it's not even the same sign.
Brendan
It's 100. Not close to this at all. It's like. It's like an M month, maybe.
Craig
Oh, yeah.
Brendan
I was really hoping that would. I feel like one of these days we're gonna mention a. Like, we're going to mention someone from one of these sitcoms from our youth, and it'll be like, yes, it is their birthday today. But all we have is on a bottom Carter.
Craig
What do you mean? That's all we have? That's amazing. Birthday. Whoever's birthday today is amazing. It's Helena Bonham Carter, Lauryn Hill, Hank Williams. I mean, that's great. And Stevie Nicks.
Brendan
Oh, shit.
Craig
Great day. Joe is a great day. God Disick. Pam Grier. Great.
Brendan
Pam Greer.
Craig
Habits. I mean, come on, this is a good day to be born.
Brendan
I'm not saying it's not a good day to be born. I'm just saying I was hoping there would be a great, like, 80s sitcom Persona who was born today, and we don't. We don't have that.
Craig
I was hoping it'd be like, lists anymore. You know what I mean? We do have French Spanish actress Astrid Burger. Frisbee,
Brendan
actually. Peggy Lee and Miles Davis. This is a big day for music. Big day for music. Birthdays.
Craig
Yeah. Okay, so back to this. Where was I Don't even have my notes up anymore.
Brendan
Where are we?
Craig
The show's over. Bye, everybody.
Podcast Host
Thank you.
Craig
So Eddie checks in with Ellie. Okay, so then Daisy and Alicia and Betool go out for a smoke. And this is where Alicia. Alicia has a. Gets a couple of drinks in her and she gets, like, volatile.
Brendan
She gets.
Craig
She always wants to fight with people. So she's like, Daisy, I have to ask you a Pinnacle question. Just roll with it. I'm gonna say my piece and you say your piece. All right. I've always thought that you champion Jenna as your second, but you would never think of me as a second. What do you see in her that you don't see in me? I mean, that's what really pisses me off. Daisy. She Goes calmness, for one. She's like, well, but I'm doing so much behind the scenes that I'm not telling anyone about it. Okay, well, the person who's moving the furniture on the stage is not also going to sing the 11 o' clock number lady. Okay,
Brendan
seriously, I just. I love. Daisy has to be the mom again. Because this is the. Why does.
Craig
What?
Brendan
Like, why does the. Why do they get to go out to the movies but I have to stay home? It's like, because you're 12 and they are 17, right?
Craig
Yeah.
Brendan
It's like, Daisy. It's like, all right. She's like, but I'm doing so much. Daisy goes, alicia, this is where this needs to drop. I'm not gonna sit here and say, you could be seconds to go back to your room and finish your homework. But I want. I don't want to take a place. I just want to be as valued. Alicia, I want you to listen to me. No, but you need to understand. Alicia, stop, Stop.
Craig
I'm never gonna be the person who inflates ego. Are you kidding me? It's like, but you've never even proposed me a second. She goes, alicia. And I'm working my balls off. Daisy. Daisy's like, is this crazy lady kidding me? She almost. She quit. She almost quit once, and then she almost got fired. Seriously.
Brendan
And I. And I love that, like, we're so used to, on these shows, when someone says this and says that. Usually what we're used to hearing now is your feelings are totally valid. And I understand why you feel that way. Unfortunately, at this moment in time, we can't do anything more. But I do love you, and you're doing such great work, but we can't accommodate that. I just love. Daisy just goes, stop, stop.
Craig
Just stop it. You're ding a ling. And I also like that she told her, you need to calm down. Just by being frantic doesn't mean you're working harder, which is so funny and so true. And so then Alicia is like, I needed that. Sorry to bring it up now. Thanks for that. And then they hug.
Brendan
I needed. I needed someone to be my mother and remind me that I have no worth in this field. Thank you so much.
Craig
So back into the relationship. I'm sure we're all completely buying. Joao kisses Daisy's hand, and she's like, I'm trying to be more affectionate with you. You asked for consistency, and I listen to ya. He's like, thank you. Means a lot. We've only got a few days left, so let's enjoy it now.
Brendan
Well, guess what? You can come into my bed now. You can find out what it sounds like to have the snoring reverberating off of my own pillow.
Craig
Oh, really?
Brendan
Great. So they kiss, and meanwhile, Ben is like, I don't have a good feeling about these guys being together. I've heard about couple power couples, but Joa took J. Daisy's side when they were not in a relationship. And if they're in a relationship, I can't even imagine how terrible it will be for me. So he's totally paranoid right now because actually, Joao had up until this point, really hasn't even had Dave's back, I believe. So Ben and Barbie start doing this thing where they're, like, shimmying the table away from the group, which I think is actually pretty obnoxious. They're like, being. Oh, my God. It's, like, funny. We're like, on a date.
Craig
Yeah. And they're like, oh, let's get away from this gross table. Right? So meanwhile, Eddie zeroes in on Jenna and he's like, cheers, young lady. Well done for getting through that charter I tried to get you fired off of. I'm proud of you. Well done, you. She's like, this is so much about sexy. I'm there for responsibility and only have good things to say about you. Ellie, on the godsend. What's up? Your mustache, your haircut, your personality, your socks, the smelly socks once. You ever wash your socks, Ellie.
Brendan
Alicia's like, addie, Jenna, I want you both present this evening.
Craig
Yes. You guys need to stop bringing the vibe down. We need to stop bringing the vibe down, right?
Brendan
Oh, my God. Enough already.
Craig
Jesus Christ. That was a joke, babe. Baby, it was a joke. Jenna's like, I'm not about the entire Earth, man. Every crew night out has been all over your. Every single crew night out. Just because it's. You are bringing the vibe down.
Brendan
It was a joke. What was that? There's a fire over.
Craig
Over across the island and Mr. McPhee's house, and someone's trapped in the well. We have to get there immediately. No, just saying. Be quiet.
Brendan
Oh, never mind.
Craig
Well, you make a drama and it is not okay. It is not okay. So Daisy's like this.
Brendan
Check.
Craig
Creating scenarios that don't exist. She's a little shit stir over there. And Ben thinks she's going to be promoted to sous chef. I cannot sit here and listen to this anymore. Going to go yell at Ben now.
Brendan
Yeah. So Joao's like, oh, my God. Ben and Barbie did you guys split the table? I love that.
Craig
Ha ha.
Brendan
Barbie's like, I don't know what you're talking about. Oh, have you got space for six Zimbabweans coming to sit with you?
Craig
So Daisy walks up to Ben, and she's like, ben, I want to talk to you. And he's like, what? What do you want? Don't draw me into something I don't know about. All right, here we go. It's the bullshit thing you're gonna do to deflect. I actually want to call you out for your bullshit. And I was actually coming in really nicely. It's just something that's been harboring me for days now. He says, no, no, no, no. You cannot sit down. Sit down. What do you want to talk about? Is it work? We'll talk about it in the morning then. Thank you. That's enough.
Brendan
Well, of course that's work. Well, because I'm not working right now. This is like. Well, I. I don't have the time to. Well, I think you can find two minutes tomorrow. All right, sugar tits. I. I couldn't stand this. I could not stand how he's like, I'm not working right now, so you can't talk. You can't address this with me, but you are happy enough to talk shit about Daisy and. And impact her work life when you're not working. So she has to deal with this when she's not working. So you should have to be able to deal with it as well when you're not working.
Craig
You know, I'm breaking with you a lot today, but I just feel like Daisy's drunk, first of all, and she's. They're all out drinking and. No, I mean, I think that you're. I think it's totally within his rights to be like, I'm not fighting tonight. I'm not. And she's standing over him, kind of telling him off in front of everybody at the table, which is like, you know.
Brendan
But she came in nicely. I want to talk with you. She said, I talk with you. And he was like, no, no, no. Get out of here. I'm not doing this. Sorry. I just. It was like he was the one being the dick in the situation.
Craig
I think they. Again, I mean, I think I. And I know I yelled at you offer is both sides thing, but I just think they're both being such babies. I mean, I think going up to somebody to confront them when you're drunk on a night out, when you're supposed to be partying in front of everybody isn't just. It's just not really a good mood, especially when, you know, it's Ben. It's just like, oh, God, just stop. Although I do love it because it's a TV show, so I'm like, yeah. Part of me is like, yes, but,
Brendan
like, it's gonna be a fight no matter what. And she's like, I don't want to have this fight when I have to be cleaning the rooms. Like, tomorrow when we start working, I have to be working. I can't be having these stupid fights. And I have to address this with him because he was being a dick earlier, and I needed those comment cards to help me with my things, and you're undermining me. And, like, I have to talk about it now because this is the only time that it works for me because
Craig
I actually have to work at work. Like, they were just on the boat. That she should have been like, you know, we need to talk before we go out or something. But, like, having a few drinks and then doing it, I think is just not.
Brendan
Well, being drunk is probably not the best way to do it. For sure. I understand him.
Craig
I understand it's not the most professional. I'm just saying. I'm just saying, like, I see what you're saying. I'm just saying that neither one of them is acting particularly professional. And I like Daisy more than Ben. Like, I'm always going to root for Daisy more. And I think Ben is a total prick to Daisy, but I think she acts really unprofessional sometimes. And this is one of the times when it's like, just walk away. Like, you don't. It's so unprofessional to be, like, fighting in front of your crew over and over again. Drunkenly.
Brendan
Yeah. I think this was still the best time for. Well, I mean, the best time would have been for her to talk about this with Ben before they got the. Before their night, for sure. Like, it should have been dressed on the boat, But I still think that she went to pull him for a chat because, yes, she is. It's. She is off the clock on the boat. She is on the clock on the reality show. And this is the time when they always talk that's true to each other about things. And not to even make it so meta like that, but I just. I do think it was, like. I imagine in her mind that it was like, you know what? We're drinking. The vibe is warmer now. It's nicer, and we can have, like, a conversation. We're not, like, wrapped up in the tension of the boat. And he just like, came at her, like, just really hard and I'm sorry. He started it. He started it and now he doesn't want to talk about it. He started like both tonight, but also over this entire charter. He was the dick first. He was the one who was being like, starting with the fish and one thing after another, undermining little comments in the galley, saying obnoxious things, being petty. She's getting angrier and angrier. She's like, I got rid of Mike. I thought I didn't have to deal with. Deal with children anymore.
Craig
And.
Brendan
And he's also. He is actually winding Ellie up in a way that is insubordinate, I think, to her, to her superior. And I just think that, like, she still went over to Ben calmly and was like, I want to talk to you about this. And then he just like dismisses her so rudely. I just thought it was inappropriate. He could have just said even more politely, like, I know we have to have a talk, but I'm having such a good night. Can we talk later? Can we talk tomorrow morning? But he just was like, oh, get the out of my face. I just thought it was totally inappropriate. Not. Not.
Craig
Yeah, I was. But it's also inappropriate for her to be coming over like, we need to talk and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then starting to like, act like, raise it up in front of everybody too. I mean, I just think they're both so unprofessional, you know? And like, he's been, yes, he's been riling Ellie up against her, but she's also been with her staff, like, Ben's doing this and Ben's doing that, and he's going to get.
Brendan
That's true.
Craig
And he's got, you know, so she's constantly riling up her side against his side and they're just both fucking children. And you can see why he's so triggered because he's like, she's. I feel like a 6 year old with a really bolty Irish nanny. I mean, stop telling me what to do because, you know, that actually happened.
Brendan
Him, like, he's. He's speaking.
Craig
He's speaking from experience. And she is like this snotty ass guy, thinks he's this rich little fuck, thinks he's better than everybody else, which she's right as well. You know, they're just so different. She's like ready to, like, go to blows. And he's like, oh, no, I'll manipulate everybody against you instead.
Brendan
So he's like, daisy, why don't you just skedaddle? Thank you. Cheers.
Craig
Good chat.
Brendan
I don't give a shit. I don't care. Thanks, Daisy Skad. And she's like, oh, you now you're going to put this back on me. He's like, I'll talk to you in the morning. She's like, oh, go yourself. So then Ben leaves. Cuz the thing with Ben is this. He puts up a big, like, puts up a big front like, oh, whatever, get out of here. I want to enjoy my night. But it always sinks in. And then he always feels guilty and sad because he's so insecure. So now he. He goes and skulks off. He goes back to the boat because he's like, now my night's ruined. So he goes off to the boat and then Jenna follows him back to the boat because.
Craig
Oh my God, Jenna, just stay. Stay out. Jenna, what are you doing? Jenna. You just got demoted. Jenna. So it's like, it's a night out. I don't want to be yelled at by her. I happen to know she doesn't run a good department. And we run one. A way better one than her and Jenna. Say, wait, wait, you saying that she doesn't run a good department? Well, I don't even know what that means, but I left. What's that, man?
Brendan
It's like, why are you. You're saying that to the department? You know all those stes in that department are shitty.
Craig
You suck. Right? Like, I left the boat to get away from her and now what, you followed me? She like, I came here because your sous chef wanted me.
Brendan
Just stop following me.
Craig
How about that one? No, do not do that. Hey, wait a second.
Brendan
And Ben go starts heading to the guest cabins. So I guess the difference all season is that when he's been sleeping the guest cabins, it's because they've been unmade up or whatever. No sheets. But now the guest cabins have been cleaned and prepared for the guests for tomorrow.
Craig
So Jenna's like, do not go to guest cabins. I'm a muffin. This is so disgusting though, that he's going in there every charter and sleeping on just a raw matt. You know, the sheets aren't only there to protect you, they're also there to protect the other people who sleep on the bed. That's so unsanitary. I can't believe he's doing that. It's just gross. I mean, put some sheets on. Put some clean sheets on the bed and then go wash them in the morning. Like.
Brendan
Yeah, so she follows him up to the guest cabin and he slams the door in her face.
Craig
She's like, man, open up.
Brendan
So then he's like, I feel like I'm a sitting duck down in the cruise quarters. I know I'm gonna be disturbed, so I'm trying to, you know, avoid any drama and see if I can get a good night's sleep. It's like, oh, my God, you sense of an ass wanker. Like, oh, if I. If you are in your bedroom, everyone's gonna come and attack you. Well, don't be a dick. You know, like.
Craig
Well, it's also not true because he's done it every single night. So that's not the reason he's doing it. He's doing it because he feels like he's entitled. He's like, I've been here forever. I'm like the. I'm one of the OGs and I'm gonna fucking sleep in a guest cabin. Bye.
Brendan
Mm. So. So everyone finishes their dinner and Jenna's just like, sobbing and because, like, everyone's so mean to Jenna in these past few charters. And the crew comes back and basically Eddie is like, hey, wow, Ben's not in my cabin. So I presume he's in your made up guest room, by the way. Oh, Alicia, you should know this. So then Alicia finds out that. That Ben is in a made up cabin and Jenna's like, yeah, he is. And now they're all getting really upset. Yeah.
Craig
And Lisa's like, he shouldn't be there. Really? Because I've been trying to get in there the entire time and all I was upset was because I was back in dances and. Damn. And that's why I'm upset. I'm over odd. Daisy, you need to listen. Seriously. Ben is sleeping in a made up cabin, so go pull him out.
Brendan
So we keep seeing shots of Ben and he's like on top of the bed, on top of the sheets, just sort of like pass out. So Joao's like, do you want me to get involved in this? So finally, Joao has decided that he is going to step up. And Alicia's like, yes, we have a guest tomorrow. It just affects our team and. And everyone about us. Like, he can go himself. So Joao gets out of the hot tub where he's been marinating, and Daisy's like, I personally think you're opening up a huge can of worms. I'm so upset. I don't think it's worth giving the sunny attention to wild. But now Joao's gonna do this to do something yeah.
Craig
And she's like, you know, Ben hasn't respected me for charters. He's not going to do it now. Like, what is he going to do? Come out and say, I'm sorry? And I was like, well, he shouldn't be sleeping in a bed that's been made by your ladies after everything we even had to help with today. So I don't think it's right. And I want us to be in an alliance. And she's like, okay, I support you. So he's going to go for it. So, Ed, he's like, long story short, we're waking him up then. And so now Joao's like, whispering outside the engineer's room. And he's like, oh, sorry to bother you, mate. Where are the keys to the rooms? Dun, dun, dun. So he's going to just walk right into that locked room. Wow.
Brendan
Yeah. He woke up the faceless engineer. So Joao's like, ben thinks it's his yacht and it's not. He's crossed to the point of no return, being disrespectful to Daisy. Ben should absolutely know better. Disregardless of our friendship, I will take work first in this occasion.
Craig
So.
Brendan
Wow. He. He unlocks the room and wakes up Joao wakes up Ben. And when Ben gets startled awake, he, like, does this, like, old timey 1930s boxing thing with his fist, like a little kangaroo.
Craig
He's like, it's the. It's the Irish nanny. Irish N is coming to spike me. No, not this time.
Brendan
I'm going to give little. Little puppet punches, marionette punches.
Craig
You can't sleep in a bed that's already. Already been made for Charterbud. Come. He's like, what the fuck are you talking about? Get out of here. They can make the beds again. He's like, no, you get out. What are you. What do you want a chef? Or do you want to make a bed again? Are you joking? No, I'm not joking. Piss off, Joao. Get the fuck out of here. Please.
Brendan
No, don't fucking talk like that to me ever again. I am from Zimbabwe. I'm trying to do what I need to do. And Ben's like, oh, you don't even know what you're talking about right now. Here, look at this. Come here. See, look, check this out. He starts stripping away the shoes and he starts pulling. He undoes the bed. And I was like. Dom and I were watching, like. And I just love that this show below deck can make taking sheets off of bed like this high stakes, like. Like line in the sand. We're like, oh, my God. He pulled the sheets off of the bed. I cannot believe what I just saw.
Craig
And it's also unsanitary for him to just be sleeping on the top of the bed and then expect the guest to sleep in that bed the next day. You can't do that either.
Brendan
With his hair grease, like, he's got like. He's so greasy.
Craig
He's like. He's got to be seeping out. Wine smell and cigarette smell, you know?
Brendan
Yeah, yeah. And all the stuff in his hair. So then Ben pulls everything off the bed and draws like, was it worth it? Because now it's unmade. Because you've done that. It is an unmade bread.
Craig
Oh, what a terrible shame. Stop the world. I'm not going to be your friend because you messed up Daisy's bed. I'll just get the out of here. Would you please Jo get out?
Brendan
So then Joao's like, I'll lock you in so you won't get out.
Craig
Don't worry.
Brendan
And I was like, oh, that's funny. This is very Captain Carrie with a drunk guest. But then Ben opens the door anyway because it unlocks from the inside. I was like, damn it, that was so good for that one second.
Craig
Go yourself, you wanker. Go back to the out there. Okay? It's like, be careful, Ben. You don't want to get me Zimgri. Oh, really? You be careful, you. You. Because there's a national emergency, you prick. Now piss off. Or remember this, you wanker.
Brendan
He slams the door. Which I was like, ah. I guess. What is next week? The season finale? I think it is.
Craig
I think so, yeah.
Brendan
Because med starts in two weeks, so. Which by the way, I guess, I guess, I guess our gay is pretty chill on this charter because it's only gonna be a one episode charter, but. Yeah. Wow. Wow, that was crazy. Like I'm. I'm generally like, have no idea what's gonna happen, like, because you can't get fired. You're not going to get fired. But like, that was so shitty. That's so shitty. What? What Ben did. Like, beyond, above and beyond. I made me so angry. I was like, wow, it's a little.
Craig
But that's what you get for letting him sleep in there every day. Why has nobody ever pushed back on Ben taking that every single day? That's not fair. They shouldn't never. They shouldn't let Ben just, you know, go in there and take the guest cabin every single time. Nobody else gets to do that. That's some boo. Yeah.
Brendan
Huge Huge bullshit.
Podcast Host
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Brendan
Wayfair.
Craig
Every style, Every home.
Brendan
Hey, sweetie. Your mother showed me this Carvana thing
Craig
for selling the car. I'm gonna give it a try.
Brendan
Wish me luck. Me again. I put in the license plate. It gave me an offer. Unbelievable. Okay, I accepted the offer. They're picking it up Tuesday from the driveway. I haven't even left my chair. It's done. The car is gone. I'm holding a check anyway.
Craig
Carvana, give it a whirl.
Brendan
Love you.
Podcast Host
So good, you'll want to leave a voicemail about it. Sell your car today on Carana. Pickup fees may apply.
Craig
Well, we have gone really long today. We are an hour and 50 minutes into this. But you want to do a quick fish report? For a fish report, it's my turn. So there are no fancy graphics this week. Sorry, everybody. So really good last week. Let me move this up so we can see this mess of a huge. I mean, it is just is riddled with skin disease.
Brendan
It's like, guys, I'm totally camouflage. Assuming Bette Midler at the end of big business will be walking by in her polka dot address.
Craig
Guys, no one wants to hang out with me because of my fashion. And also because my ears look like eyes.
Brendan
Guys, one thing that's great about being a fish is that you can be camouflaged. All sorts of exciting things. For instance, if anyone wants to make some confetti out of charcoal, I am ready to hide.
Craig
Now, I don't know this eel, but I do know this about it. It does not moisturize.
Brendan
Moray eels are really. They. They. They could use some skincare. They always for sure craggly.
Craig
Yeah, the laser resurfacing something. Okay, so. Oh, but look at how cute he is when he smiles. You know what? You just. What? Mary. Are you Mary Tyler Moore? Because you just turned the world on with your smile. My opinion is totally different now. You are adorable. Look at him.
Brendan
You are an adorable. I mean, I know that Moray eels are vicious and unkind to scuba divers. But look at this. This guy's adorable. It's just. What a sweetheart. What a sweetheart. Sweet, sweet guy.
Craig
Absolutely adorable. He looks kind of like a dolphin with cute little eyes. Yeah, I love him. Now you want me over. Now that's. I like this baby.
Brendan
And I like those eyeballs on his nose. Like. Yeah, I can see through my nostrils.
Craig
It's like, do I have eye boogers or nose boogers? Who even. Who even needs to know the difference? Eating both of them?
Brendan
Wait, you can see my eye? Damn it. I was hoping it would blend in with my dots.
Craig
Oh, well, it's the point of having a polka dot eye if it doesn't blend. Okay, so next up is. Now this fish. This is the Jennifer Coolidge of fish.
Brendan
Yeah. Seriously, these lips.
Craig
What is even happening with this fish?
Brendan
I love this statement. Yellow. It's going. It's going for, you know, this. It's like, in a life full of mustard, in a life full of ketchup fish, I'll be the mustard.
Craig
This is a bunch of red Florida culottes that it's wearing these lips. It's got really turquoise eyes, which are pretty, and then these big, huge pink lips, and it looks like it's making a face. Like, pretty, cute fish.
Brendan
I love it. It looks great.
Craig
Okay, next up, we have this fish a million times.
Brendan
This grouper.
Craig
Yes.
Brendan
This grouper is sort of like when you meet, like, a lady from the Upper east side who's had just, like, a little bit too much surgery. And it really hasn't helped at all. It's like it's. Now it's too late. Yeah, now it's just. Just increasing distortions.
Craig
Well, we just had the Jennifer Coolidge fish. This is what happens years later when you get all that work done. This is kind of what happens. This is your trajectory, this fish. This reminds me of. Look, I'm so happy and in my middle age, and it's like, no, this is what happens to you.
Brendan
Yeah. Do you remember Elise Sloan?
Craig
Of course.
Brendan
I'm sort of getting at least Sloan vibes, but without the wig. Like, if you put, like, black hair on it, like, long black hair and bangs, I'd be like, it's Elise.
Craig
Also, you forgot to put your teeth in. That's. That's embarrassing. See, the straight up.
Brendan
You know, I think you can make your. By the way, I think you can make your. The controls smaller. I think if you. If you click on the lower right, the.
Craig
Of the. Yeah, well, that didn't make it smaller. I just made the screen bigger. So that's what I did.
Brendan
And then it's not the controls that got smaller is that the screens got bigger.
Craig
Normally, Desmond did that, and also now that I look at it, so big. His eyes look like pots, like, for plants.
Brendan
Oh, yeah.
Craig
That's so weird. Okay, let's check out the next one.
Brendan
For a moment, I thought it was a slide. I was like, well, look at that goofy fish.
Craig
I don't like when they're showing cutting sushi right next to the fish. Look, I was wondering, is it. It's like, what the bro?
Brendan
I was wondering if the sushi was gonna make it into the fish report. But sometimes we have to draw attention to the atrocities that are our scaly friends must face.
Craig
Yeah.
Brendan
Basically so happy.
Craig
We're watching the fish, watch the news. They're like, oh, God, another atrocity down there. It was terrible.
Brendan
They will. Gina, fishing hider over there is just swimming along, trying to get the fish. Marshals guys want to go to the Empire Center.
Craig
These fish aren't that fascinating, but they're adorable. They're like two little twin yellow fish.
Brendan
But they've also heard about the concept of sushi. They're like, did you see what the news last night? It's terrible. I'm putting up a yellow square on Instagram.
Craig
Like, we are so angry. We're gathering in the square.
Brendan
Their eyes are like, oh, my God. They're these. They look traumatized. I think they can see the sushi happening.
Craig
Yeah. Why the long face? We're watching our brother get chopped
Brendan
by a sous chef. Not even a galley hand.
Craig
All right, now this stingray thing is like, did I fart? I didn't.
Brendan
You farted. You fart. It's definitely giving, like, Fast and Furious Stingray Edition. It's like doing donuts in the parking lot somewhere.
Craig
Yeah. What is this thing next to it? Do you see this fish that I'm circling here?
Brendan
I think that's that buffer. We've seen this one. That's. That's the secretary fish that has become like, excuse me, you've got a call. Mr. Mushnicky got a call, line five.
Craig
He's like, get someone in here to clean this office. Yeah, but you're throwing stuff around the office. Yeah, that's the point. That's why I need someone to get over here and clean it. Stupid.
Brendan
Yeah. She normally doesn't appear in other people's other. Other people's other fishes screens, so it's sort of funny that she's doing a Collab with this Ray right now.
Craig
Just chilling. She's like lying on the ground just watching him. Like, oh my God, I could watch him do this all day. It's my job. What are you gonna do?
Brendan
You're gonna. You're gonna wear out your tires making those donuts. You gotta go to just tires.
Craig
Oh, guess. You know what? I'll get the duster. I'll get the duster. You gotta wear that suit for the rest of the day.
Brendan
I think she's actually not on the. She's not sitting on the. On the floor. I think she's actually swimming above this ray. Cuz look, look what happens. She. She starts to.
Craig
Oh, you're right. It was a trick of the eye. I thought she was just like sitting down at her desk. She's like, I've never seen that.
Brendan
She's like, I gotta. I gotta slam on the brakes. This guy's doing donuts in front of me.
Craig
Sir, do not threaten me with your stinger. Okay? You. We've been through this before. It's against HR policy. Put it away. Put it away.
Brendan
Look, there's another one back there that's doing the same thing. She's like, oh, my God, so many, so many donuts happening all at once.
Craig
It's embarrassing. Okay? I just put this plant because it made me think how delicious it would be if churros were plants. I mean, look at this thing.
Brendan
God is for a giving pipe cleaner. Today though, we've seen this plant several times, and today it's sort of reminding me more of a pipe cleaner than a churro.
Craig
You know, now that it's big, it does look more like a pipe cleaner. Maybe I was just hungry when I watch this. This turtle gives. No, it's just like I'm. I'm just floating. I don't care. It's just like floating to the bottom of the ocean.
Brendan
It's trying to impress everyone by. By saying like, hey, everyone, look at my amazing swan dive. Like, it doesn't count if you're already in the water.
Craig
It's facing away from Eddie's terrible haircut. It's like, I can't look. I can't.
Brendan
I can't look at those. That strange transition on the side of your head from like a zero blade to a no blade
Craig
to just hand chopped.
Brendan
It's like, I can't.
Craig
I can't deal with you. This is another person without sheets on their bed. But they're probably just washing them at this point, so I'm gonna let that go. Now look at this turtle. Look at the gorgeosity of this turtle compared to this turtle. This turtle's given up on life. This turtle's, like, going out and I'm getting laid. Okay.
Brendan
Yeah.
Craig
Look at my cat eyes. Look, I did smokey eyes.
Brendan
This turtle's got everything going on. Colors on the shell, big, beautiful patterns. I mean, it's just a gorgeous, gorgeous turtle.
Craig
It really is. It's like. And armpits. Even my armpits are good.
Brendan
It's doing the crawl. Yep. Like, this is called freestyle.
Craig
This turtle was like, listen, I'm going out tonight. I want to look like a terracotta tile. So anything you could. I want to look like I'm on a roof in Italy. Just anything.
Brendan
I. I love when fish try out their camouflage. Like, you can't see me. Right. Maybe you should put some lipstick on. I don't know. You were close to being camouflaged.
Craig
It's the Britney's mom of fish. It's like, just give me white lipstick
Brendan
and I'll put it on. It really is. I love. I love all the footage they found this season of fish just sitting around, hanging out, not actually swimming anywhere. It's like, yeah, I'm just going to sit here. I'm going to hang out in the coral.
Craig
I honestly don't know that fish relax like this. I never knew until I watched this show. It's like, I didn't know that horses. No, I think I knew horses did, but I don't think I knew that cows lied down. Isn't that weird? And I grew up around cows, and I just never saw them lie down. So I didn't know until I saw some western. I saw a cow lying down. I was like, oh, I thought they always stood.
Brendan
Yeah, at some point.
Craig
Okay. What? My dog.
Brendan
Sometimes your dogs are barking, you know?
Craig
That's true.
Brendan
Oh, I love this fish is, like, not even scared, this fish. Like, we are coming in so close. This fish is like, I'm not. This is a good seat. I'm not giving it up. Yeah, the Apple store opens up tomorrow, and I'm going to get that new model of iPhone. I'm not giving up my spot in this line.
Craig
I'm getting the iPhone air. I don't care if the battery is five minutes long. It's thin.
Brendan
All right, everybody, face. It looks like it has a face. Wait, it does. Look where its eye is. You see where the eye is? And to the right of the eye all the way. Move your. Move your cursor right there. Doesn't that look like the. Wait no, to the left. To the left. Yeah. Doesn't look like a nose and a mouth and like a little like. Like this. Yeah.
Craig
Right where?
Brendan
Right where you're right there. Doesn't look like a little nose and a mouth. A human nose and a mouth? Yeah.
Craig
Like a profile.
Brendan
Seeing it. No, no, no. It's like looking at. It looks like the mouth is saying, hey. Hey. There's like a lower lip, an upper lip and a nose. You see? I wish I could point to it maybe. I wish you could see my cursor.
Craig
Yeah, it does look like it's talking at the side of its face.
Brendan
Like. Hey, what are you doing?
Craig
The mouth.
Brendan
Yeah, yeah, I see it now.
Craig
That's funny. All right, fish report. Fish report. This has been the fish Report. All right, thank you so much for. I've removed the wrong fish. I removed myself. Thank you, everybody, for being here. We will be back tomorrow and the rest of the week before we're off to New York for live streaming tickets to forbidden Housewives cabaret June 3rd and June 5th. Go to watch what crappens.com and we'll talk to you guys next time. Bye.
Brendan
Okay, bye. Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. She answered the call. It's Adia Paul. Ain't no thing like Allison King.
Craig
Our way is the Amber way.
Brendan
It's the Foster and the Furious. It's a man Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Auto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.
Craig
Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, She's a Daniella Etchells. We never miss her call. It's Diane call. Sunday in the park with Dylan Clark. Big yay. It's Emily Gaultier.
Brendan
Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no Trickolus. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go. We all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no less namey Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch.
Craig
She's a total knockout. It's Katie Manok.
Brendan
She's our favorite streamer. Caroline Peacock.
Craig
Kristen the Piston Anderson. Que sera sera Whatever will be Will Lauren Silsby. She gets a name from us. It's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry Macy. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.
Brendan
This is living with Michelle Vivian.
Craig
I love Aya Olivia Williamson.
Brendan
She sure is swell. It's Raquel.
Craig
Yes, we canna.
Brendan
It's Savannah Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman let's share with Sharon Eldridge.
Craig
Darn skippy. It's Tippy. And our super Premium sponsors she's VVIP
Brendan
it's Amanda V. Somebody get us 10cc of Betsy MD we're taking the gold with Brenda Silva let's get real with
Craig
Caitlin o' Neal Put us on a stretcher It's Charlotte Fletcher Hogle your horses. It's Christine Hogle don't get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides who, what, why, where?
Brendan
And Gwen Pentland Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish.
Craig
It's Jen Plish have a kebab with
Brendan
Kate Rob My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo let's get savage with Laura Wildman in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock we're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthi always killing it. It's Lola Al Kalani. Roger that. It's Marla's Rogers the incredible edible Matthew
Craig
sisters She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose she's the lady of the house A train Rachel Sharous There's a chance of meatballs It's Rebecca Cloud she's our princess It's Rebecca Prince
Brendan
she's the queen bee It's Sarah Lemke
Craig
we cannot tell a lie It's Sarah
Brendan
Telliff son Shannon out of a can and Anthony please don't stop it's solely and pop let's take off with Tamla
Craig
playing Strike a pose. It's Tori Rose she ain't no shrinking violet Cootard. We love you guys. Days,
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Episode #3380 | Released May 26, 2026
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
This lively installment of Watch What Crappens is the second part of the recap for Below Deck Down Under S04E17 (“So Sous Me”). Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam hilariously dissect all the yachtie drama: radio miscommunications, mid-charter simmering tensions, sous chef shenanigans, and the crew’s escalating beef—particularly focusing on Daisy and Ben’s ongoing feud. Signature razor-sharp commentary, sitcom references, and a highly entertaining “Fish Report” round out the episode.
Daisy’s attempt to coordinate lunch with the galley goes awry when Ellie's radio is off, leading to confusion and testy exchanges.
Hot tub mishap:
Daisy snaps on the radio, telling Ellie to bring the food herself or get her assistant, sparking laughter from the hosts but concern about professionalism.
Daisy and Ben’s friction intensifies:
Ongoing undermining:
Debate over who’s right: Both hosts agree Daisy and Ben are acting like children, but cannot ignore the “boys’ club” undertones.
Ben reads guest feedback aloud, stalling Daisy from her department debrief.
The exchange underlines the simmering department rivalries and gendered workplace microaggressions.
Next group: a familiar, “notorious” Below Deck guest, Brandon, returns. The hosts relish the idea of his “biblical” Seven Deadly Sins–themed party.
The hosts lampoon the “gays go biblical” trend and the very basic food preferences from these yacht charter guests.
Dinner at Foxy Jacks:
Interpersonal Tensions:
Joao and Daisy’s budding romance gets affectionate but foreshadows future drama.
The Daisy vs. Ben Confrontation (35:41–40:39):
Guest Cabin Drama:
Ben sneaks into a made-up guest cabin for the night, breaking boat protocol.
Joao, after much deliberation, retrieves the room keys to expel Ben, who melodramatically rips the sheets from the bed in protest.
Comedic dramatization of the face-off, including Joao threatening to lock Ben in.
This episode delivers a classic Crappens blend of high-energy recapping, biting social observations, and Bravo-flavored camp. Daisy and Ben’s mutual sabotage spills from the boat onto the dock and back again, sparking a spirited (and sometimes serious) exchange among the hosts about gender, workplace respect, and who exactly is the bigger baby. The radiant absurdity of Below Deck’s workplace drama and social hierarchies is put under a comedic microscope, with guest shenanigans and marine life both serving as perfect fodder.
If you missed the episode, you’ll walk away knowing why the lobster salad sat unserved, what’s so loaded about a comment card, and how a grouper can be compared to an Upper East Side socialite. There’s tension, there’s comedy, and there are fish with lips for days.
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