Watch What Crappens – Dwell Hello #318: Finding Family in Dublin

Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Date: September 14, 2023

Overview

In this episode of "Dwell Hello," Ben and Ronnie recap House Hunters International Season 187, Episode 12: “Finding Family in Dublin.” A Canadian couple, Sean and Terry, move from Calgary to Dublin to explore Sean’s Irish heritage and kick off a new chapter in their lives. With classic Crappens irreverence, the hosts roast, sympathize, and riff on everything from public exercise equipment and ice cream shenanigans to the peculiarities of the Dublin rental market. The tone is sharp, silly, and full of affectionate cynicism—perfect for Bravo and house hunt fans alike.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Intro to the Couple and Concept (02:15–04:59)

• Ben and Ronnie set the stage: a Calgary couple moving to Dublin—“Canadian Midwestern accents and Irish accents. I'm in.” (02:45, Ben)
• The couple, Sean (the smiling optimist) and Terry (the more pragmatic), are seen using public park exercise equipment, which the hosts immediately mock as a waste of tax dollars.
  • Ronnie: “My taxes are fucking paying for that. Fuck you guys. … I'm not paying taxes anymore. Disgusting.” (03:52)
• Terry gets ice cream on Sean’s face; he retaliates aggressively—prompting suspicion.
  • Ronnie: “That’s the first time I thought, he’s an abuser.” (04:59)
  • Ben: “Who does that?” (05:01)

2. Their Backstory, Friend-Suggested Life Choices, and “Trouble Ahead” (05:05–11:13)

• The backstory: they worked together in a newsroom, only realizing their chemistry because friends pointed it out (06:33–07:19).
  • Quote: “This couple only does things that their friends suggest.” – Ronnie (08:07)
• The move is prompted by a suggestion that Sean qualifies for Irish citizenship—and, again, a friend's advice.
• Terry’s previous international adventures also happened because of a friend (“I didn’t even know I liked croissants ... My friend said, you are going to like it.”) (09:03–09:38)
• The hosts anticipate disaster since the couple is ignoring the universal wisdom not to marry, change homes, and change jobs in the same year.
  • Ronnie: “This is a recipe for disaster.” (05:44)

3. Fish Out of Water and Relationship Dynamics (11:38–13:51)

• Ben and Ronnie riff on how Terry always listens to her friends' advice, from education to life choices—her decision to go back to school is also due to a friend's suggestion.
• Sean is labeled a “smiling Jack o’lantern,” as his positivity comes off as naive to the hosts.
• They riff on Canadian stereotypes, making jokes about bringing Avril Lavigne, Alanis Morissette CDs, and the joys of shuffleboard in Ireland.

4. The Relocation Specialist & House Hunting Begins (13:55–17:56)

• Enter Leslie Light, the “relocation specialist” with an incredulous name.
  • Ronnie: “Are you fucking kidding me? ... She’s not even a real estate agent.” (13:06–13:13)
• Sean prioritizes proximity to pubs over all else, whereas Terry wants "Irish charm."
  • Ronnie: “That guy would move into a keg if you’d let him.” (24:45)
• Ben and Ronnie mock the tendency of American House Hunters to demand overt local “charm” in their rentals abroad.

5. House 1: No Irish Charm “High Spec” Apartment (18:44–21:26)

• Modern apartment, $1,800, “no Irish charm.”
  • Terry’s concerned about the lack of character, and the hosts point out the irony given her choice in partner.
  • The kitchen is minuscule: “It’s like an airplane kitchen ... There needs to be laws, like dog crates. Your dog should at least be able to turn around the crate.” – Ronnie (21:05)
  • Sean claims, “How much space do we really need?” to which the hosts respond that Terry needs a place to hide from him. (21:05–21:22)

6. House 2: The “Mews” Property—Charm & Compromises (32:32–39:45)

• A converted stable (mews) with loads of character, $2,100, but only one bathroom—located through the bedroom.
  • Quote (Ben): “He’s like, oh God ... now if my parents come, they're gonna have to trample through the bedroom just to get here.” (37:15)
• Ronnie explains the real inconvenience of this layout: “It’s not only ... they might see me naked or whatever. It's that your mom is gonna ... linger a poop. And you’re just stuck ... with your parent poop in the house.” (38:21)

7. House 3: The Boring Suburban Option (43:35–46:56)

• Modern, further out, $1,900—a “meh” apartment that feels just like home, which no one wants.
  • Ben: “If you’re an expat, what’s the point of just moving to the suburbs?” (44:18)
• It’s low on “charm,” high on storage (“so much cupboard space!”), but the hosts agree the character is lacking.

8. The Choice & Three Months Later (48:02–50:47)

• After much debate over charm/location vs. functional layout, the couple choose House 1. The hosts think this is a mistake given Sean’s and Terry’s divergent needs, but concede House 1 is cute and well-located.
  • “He hates the bathroom situation [in House 2]. And so ... they go for house number one. I could not believe it.” – Ben (48:33)
• Flash-forward: Sean & Terry have made the apartment homey, are biking around Dublin, and Sean has made family connections.
  • Ben jokes about a pilfered mirror from House 3 showing up in their apartment.

Memorable Quotes & Moments

Classic Snark on Relationships:

• Ronnie: “If your family hates you so much in America, just go look for new ones in Dublin.” (05:15)
• Ronnie: “You married Sean, for crying out loud!” (19:40)

On House Hunter Tropes:

• Ben: “There’s always someone who’s like, ‘I just want this country in every single fixture around me.’ ... You’re in Ireland.” (23:50–24:09)
• Ronnie: “I feel like other countries aren’t like, ‘Wow, I just wish this place was more American.’” (24:21)

Irish & Canadian Stereotypes/Humor:

• “You can get to the Enya concert to the U2 concert in five minutes flat.” – Ben (14:57)
• “Our house in Calgary was built from 100 hockey net.” – Ronnie (35:11)

Hosts Venting:

• Ronnie: "Fuck your yoga and fuck your cold, plunging. ... Send me some Ben & Jerry's." (43:19)
• Ben on the couple’s pattern: “They only do things their friends suggest.” (08:07)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Couple’s introduction & mockery of park scene: 02:15–04:59
• Their backstory & “friends always decide” montage: 06:33–09:38
• Meeting relocation specialist & criteria for the move: 13:55–17:56
• House 1 walk-through & reactions: 18:44–21:26
• House 2 (the mews) walk-through: 32:32–39:45
• House 3 (the bland one) walk-through: 43:35–46:56
• Decision and three months later wrap-up: 48:02–50:47

Tone & Takeaways

The episode is a riot of sarcasm, affection, and reality TV satire. The hosts turn even mundane house features or wedding advice into comic gold, all while keeping up friendly mockery of Sean and Terry’s decision-making and personalities.
Listeners walk away feeling like they’ve just watched the episode themselves—except with all the best jokes and homeowners’ neuroses spelled out.

Final Thoughts:
The hosts conclude that, while the couple chose practicality over “Irish charm,” their story is relatable for any expat or couple making a big life leap—and that “as always, we mock because we love.” If you love house hunting, relationship drama, or just need a laugh about the perils of moving abroad, this is a Dwell Hello classic.