Dwell Hello #319: Fertile Vs. Futile on the Sunshine Coast

Summary

Podcast Summary: Watch What Crappens

Episode: Dwell Hello #319: Fertile Vs. Futile on the Sunshine Coast

Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Date: September 27, 2023

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Episode Overview

Ben and Ronnie recap and comically dissect an episode of "House Hunters International," specifically Season 166, Episode 2: "Fertile vs. Futile," where a South African family relocates to Australia’s Sunshine Coast. The duo gleefully mock, praise, and riff on the oddities of the house hunters—Joe, Allison, and their daughter Lucy—focusing on their contrasting personalities and the hilariously theatrical dynamics between them as they debate rural versus city living. The recap is steeped in Watch What Crappens’ signature campy, Bravo-obsessed energy, blending House Hunters critique with sharp improv and running bits about clowning, acting, and dog theater.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Meet the House Hunters: Joe, Allison, and Lucy

[01:23-08:10]

• The family is introduced on a dog beach in Australia after moving from South Africa.
• Joe: A former edgy, "rock star" type turned accountant (nicknamed “J Crunch”), with a deep desire to "live off the land."
• Allison: A quirky, drama-loving working actor known for outlandish costumes and passion for children's/dog theater and clown performances.
• Lucy: Their daughter, characterized as outdoorsy, often left to wander "feral" in the woods.

Memorable moment:

• Ronnie on Allison: “I knew that this was going to be an actory person because she does karate chop talk… like she’s separating dough.” [05:40]

2. Joe vs. Allison: Competing Visions for the Move

[08:10-17:16]

• Joe dreams of a large, rural property like his childhood in South Africa, wants isolation, space, and land.
• Allison craves proximity to community and culture, a cosmopolitan lifestyle, and convenient, “turnkey” home.

Quote:

• Ben riffing: “I just want any animal smaller than a golf cart in my neighborhood.” [04:28]
• Ronnie, mocking the nostalgia: “What is with the man-children on this show? Every place… has to remind them of home. What did your mothers do to you?” [16:54]

3. Meet the Relocation Specialist: Zoe Griffin

[14:25-18:34]

• Zoe, the realtor/relocation specialist, is suspected by Ben and Ronnie to have secret community theatre ambitions, as she’s overly theatrical in her approach.

Quote:

• Ronnie: “Please stop doing the box step while you’re talking, while you’re doing your House Hunters intro.” [14:57]

4. Touring the Three Homes

• House #1: Modern Beach Home (Noosa Heads, $900K)

  • Close to amenities, small plot, pool, “community vibe,” modern and move-in ready.
  • Joe is surprisingly content despite small land, but Ben jokes that TV rules require him to pretend dissatisfaction for drama.
  • “I’ll grow corn in that pool.” [24:51]

• House #2: Giant Rural Modern Home (Karoiba, $915K)

  • Massive house on two acres, modern appliances, media room, pond on property (scary and “croc-infested” per Ben).
  • Ideal for Joe's Back-to-the-Land fantasies.
  • Banter about the previous owners’ fate in the creepy pond.
  • Ben: “Joe’s that typical guy, 'I want to live off the land,' Joe’s going to poison you. I just don’t trust J Crunch to live off the land.” [36:02]

• House #3: Small, Outdated Rural House (Palm Woods, $850K)

  • Aging, “fixer-upper,” 10 acres, corrugated metal patio.
  • Ronnie: “For the price difference, they’re only really saving $50,000, which is nothing, for the difference in style… You’ll have to spend a lot to fix it up.” [40:11]
  • Both hosts are incredulous at the cramped bedrooms and lack of privacy.
  • “It’s like actively ugly.” [42:20]

5. Allison’s Career Aspirations: The Clown Doctor Audition

[28:38-31:34]

• As the family settles in, Allison auditions for “Clown Doctors,” an Australian program for entertaining sick children.
• The banter escalates with Ronnie and Ben roasting the idea, joking about traumatizing Lucy and hospital staff alike.
• Ben: “Dr. Nincompoop is just trying to go from CPA to CYA: See ya.” [29:32]

6. Decision Time: Which House Did They Choose?

[44:22-46:57]

• Hosts predict the large rural house (#2) is the “right” answer.
• SHOCK: Family chooses House #3, the outdated small house with lots of land, eliminating the most expensive and spacious option first.
• Ronnie: “You’re gonna share a bedroom door with poor Lucy. Lucy’s never gonna make out with anybody.” [46:45]
• Ben: “It was literally the worst. I was shocked. I’m always so shocked when they choose the worst one. And yet it happens so consistently on this show.” [46:52]

7. 6 Months Later: Life on the Land

[46:57-48:51]

• The family seems content; Lucy runs wild on a rope swing, launching herself into the questionable pond.
• Joe brags about his farming success: “I’ve already harvested 40 kilograms of jalapeno chili.” [47:30]
• Hosts mock the impracticality: “For the next six months, all we’re eating is jalapenos.” [47:53]
• Allison is now officially a hospital clown, and Ronnie apologizes to the sick children of Australia.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Joe's Accountant Past:
  • Ben: "He basically gave up his fun, edgy ways to be a CPA…" [07:41]
  • Ronnie, as narrator: “Let’s stop acting. You didn’t move to a treehouse in the middle of Guatemala…” [13:14]
• On Allison's Theatrical Leanings:
  • “We actually did an old clown dog version of Angels in America…” [12:29]
  • “Every time we sing ‘Ring of Keys,’ the dog started crying at the front door.” [21:56]
• Preview for the Next Episode:
  • Ben (mocking House Hunters setups): “One of them is allergic to cats, but he’s going to move in with his boyfriend who loves cats.” [49:43]

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Segment Timestamps

• Family Introduction & Background: [01:23–08:10]
• Dreams & Dilemmas: [08:10–17:16]
• Real Estate Agent Introduction: [14:25–18:34]
• Touring House #1 (Beach Home): [18:45–27:30]
• Touring House #2 (Country Estate): [27:30–36:43]
• Touring House #3 (Fixer Lower): [39:01–43:02]
• Allison's Clowning Audition: [28:38–31:34]
• Decision & Result: [44:22–46:57]
• Six Months Later Check-In: [46:57–48:51]

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Tone & Style

As ever, Ben and Ronnie maintain a fast-paced, sharp-witted, and joyously mocking tone—threading Bravo in-jokes, pop culture references, and self-aware tangents throughout their recap. Their affection for House Hunters-style oddballs is paired with barbed critique and recurring clown/acting sketches. They bring humor to every twist, bemoan every “bad” house-hunting decision, and lovingly roast every cast member, including the realtors.

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Final Thoughts

If you missed this episode, you missed a parade of character voices, improv bits (clown Hamlet, dog Angels in America, and Dr. Nincompoop), and the cathartic mockery of people who always, always pick the house with “the worst kitchen” and “the craziest clown doctor energy.” The episode is a classic Watch What Crappens blend of Bravo-sphere snark, Theater Kid nostalgia, and affectionate eye-rolling at the human condition.

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For more Bravo satire, find the podcast on all major platforms or support bonus recaps via Patreon.

Transcript

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[C]

Ding dong.

[A]

Ding dong.

[C]

Ding dong.

[A]

Ding ding ding ding ding dong.

[C]

Hello. Well, hello and welcome to Dwell. Hello, I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there. Hi, Ben.

[A]

Hi, Ronnie. How's it going?

[C]

Great, my little honey pie. How's everything going with you?

[A]

So good. Just happy to talk more. House Hunters with you as usual. As usual.

[C]

Yes. Welcome to our House Hunters show. Today is House Hunters International. Actually it is season 162, episode two, fertile versus futile. You can find this on Max. The best way to find these episodes is just to go on Max and if you have Max and search that title, fertile versus Futile. Because as you know by now, all of the different services list House Hunters under different seasons and different episode numbers make it as confusing as as possible. But this one is on Max. Fertile versus futile.

[A]

Was it season one? Was it season 162 or 166?

[C]

166, episode two.

[A]

Okay, great. Perfect. Yeah, but I mean, like Ronnie said, just search virtual versus futile and you're pretty much going to find it. Yes.

[C]

So welcome to the show, everybody. Okay, so we begin on the beach.

[A]

And.

[C]

And it's a mom, dad and a daughter. The daughter and the father love stupid straw hats. I'm gonna forgive the stupid straw hat. Cause it's a beach and you need them in this kind of sun. And just because I don't like hats on Kyle Richards all the time doesn't mean that nobody else can wear hats. So I'm gonna go ahead and just get off my hat hate train for a little while.

[A]

We're gonna make a hat exception for Joe and Allison. And Linda comes in and says Jo, Alison and their daughter Lucy are leaving South Africa for a complete change on the Sunshine coast of Australia. But they have vastly different visions of what that looks like. One vision is in clown makeup, and the other is just in CPA garb.

[C]

One place has gorgeous elephants, and the other place has dog shit all over a beach where they are currently sitting right now because they're on a dog beach, and we see their other home, and it's like a giant elephant. I mean, I don't know. I know what I'd choose. Of course, dogs do poop everywhere. Elephants probably poop a lot more. I'm gonna go ahead. And also, if a dog stepped on you, it wouldn't be that bad. Whereas if an elephant stepped on you, that would be mad. Also, I don't think dogs take revenge on people. Whereas elephants. Remember when elephants took revenge on that old lady in the village who was taunting the elephants, and then they came to her village and found her ass and stomped her dead? Do you remember that news story?

[A]

I. I don't, but I believe it, because an elephant never forgets. Yeah. By the way, so don't mock crows, because they remember.

[C]

Don't with crows.

[A]

Don't with them. Just be happy. Just, like, wave high to them and just keep. Keep it moving.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah. But in other words, I actually support the move now. Elephants, great in pictures. Don't sound great in my neighborhood.

[A]

Not good.

[C]

Okay. For the dog beach.

[A]

I don't want an elephant in my neighborhood. I'll tell you that much. I don't want anything. I don't want any big animals. I don't want any animals larger than a golf cart in my neighborhood.

[C]

Or.

[A]

Honestly, I don't want any animals. Maybe as large as a small children's vehicle. Like a. Like a little thing, a little play vehicle that you. Fred Flintstone around the driveway.

[C]

So the mom's like, I think that was the longest flight I've ever been on. And the dad's like, oh, that was super long. Well, they're those people. You're sitting on a fucking beach. Stop talking about your flight. You won.

[A]

Okay? Yeah. So they are in the. I don't know. Is it the Natal region? The Natal region.

[C]

But. But we have Joe Natal babies everywhere. People are like, God, I wish I had a baby right now. Just must be being in the Natal region.

[A]

So Joe's like, we are from South Africa. And Allison's like, our relationship began 20. 20 years. 20, 20 odd years ago. Emphasis on odd. We actually have a very odd relationship, specifically 20 years ago, but odd. It's been an odd 20 years.

[C]

And I knew that this was going to be an actory person because she does karate chop talk. Like, it's like a mixture. It's not karate chop, like, horizontally. It's like karate chopping vertically. Like she's separating dough. She's dough dividing while she talks. Kind of a Shannon Beador type thing. I was like, yeah, as a very dramatic person, you know, she's like, it's been a dream for a long time. We share dreams. That's why we're both in such blinding patterns. I've got one blinding pattern, he's got another blinding pattern. We're basically like every season of Old Navy crashing up against each other in a marriage.

[A]

And we see a picture. We see a picture of them when they first met. And, like, she was like, young and hip, and he was. Both were kind of like, young and hip, sort of, like, edgy. Looked like they were. They would go to, like, no Doubt concerts and stuff like that. And Joe's like, it was love at F. And she goes, we got married and had a beautiful girl Lucy we love Lucy, Lucy, don't you love the love that we give you? Shut up. Mother called. She's wonderful.

[C]

They have very different versions of what a dream looks like, and it's hard to pick a side because they both dress like nightmares. So it's been real rough for us here in the editing room. So they're walking on the beach, and Jo Allison's like, like, oh, I love that ocean over there. Isn't it beautiful? And he's like, I wonder if I can grow corn on it, Because I love land. I want to live on land. Land where you can grow things. Things grow on land. Can't wait to live on land, you know?

[A]

I knew I wanted to own my own business one day, so I became an accountant. And I was like, oh, this is sad. Not because it's sad to be an accountant, but just because when we see that photo of them looking, like, young and edgy and like, yeah, we're. We're like rock stars. We're gonna see the world. He's like, that's when I knew I'm gonna become an accountant. I was like, oh, so this is how it happens.

[C]

Yeah, that's why it's better to date people. Like, never start dating till you're really old, because people have already given up their original dream, and you see what the real them is now, you know? And.

[A]

And so he basically gave up his, like, his fun, edgy ways to be a cpa. And Allison says, you know, they called him J Crunch. And towards the End of high school, I really got into drama and theater. I was like, wait, I can't even talk about your high school J Crunch because he crunches numbers.

[C]

I crunch numbers? No. Well, also, he eats the cereal very loudly. You don't want to be near it. You'll be splitted in filth.

[A]

Yeah. He actually gets tickets for J Crunching. The only person in South Africa who gets j Crunching tickets.

[C]

So I really got into drama and theater, and I really found my seat and my passion from there. And so from that. Oh, I've made a living edicting. I was like, oh, really? Prove it. I don't believe you. And then they put up her dress like a park ranger, but, like, with a frog eye headband on top of her big straw hat. And then rosy cheek blush, like baby Jane, like a.

[A]

Like a clown park ranger with a froggy hat. And then there's also. When she's talking about acting, she's like, I really found my passion for it. They show her dress as a mime, and first she's, like, holding a red flower, like, here's a whimsical flower. And then she's just holding up an empty picture frame and looking through it in her mime makeup. It's like it was like every, like. Like waiting for guffman moment. It was like Catherine o' Hara's character and waiting for guffman, you know?

[C]

Yeah. She's like, I've got my homework set out for me. Learning about Australian theater. I was like, you sure do.

[A]

They show a picture of her in doggy makeup with, like, a little headband that has the ears. She's like, you know, before, you know, I have to see where the best place for me to do my doggy hamlet production.

[C]

Yeah. You know, everyone's heard of children's theater, but does this place have dog theater? Right. We're gonna find out. And I was like, well, during my accounting career. Jesus Christ, Crunch. Why do you have to about with my acting segment? All right? You can't just go from acting to bragging about counting things. All right?

[A]

I was just about to explain all the motivations that went as Went into me dressing up like a clown reporter. Okay? People need to know, all right?

[C]

It's different segment. Different segment. All right? During my accounting career, I've managed to save money, and so that stood us in good. Stand in good stead for getting a leg up in getting to Australia. You said leg up Now. Now a dog's pissing on you. All right? Don't give a dog Its cue at a dog beat. All right.

[A]

It's called method. It's called method. These are. This is my trip. Okay? I understand the way they work.

[C]

So she's like, my sister lives in Perth, and I've always just found Australia so beautiful. But when we came to Brisbane to visit Joe's uncle, we said, wow. I mean, that's a hand on me bum. Am I right? Fresh uncle is fresh men.

[A]

I have to say, when I would walk down the streets in Brisbane in full clown makeup, I was so impressed with the way people didn't just look at me strangely and call them police. I really like the city.

[C]

I decided to change careers. My uncle is a builder on the sunshine coast. And it's more in line with where I want to be, which is outdoors, on land, in nature, which has land and possibly gross corn. We want complete change. On land.

[A]

Yeah, I'd like to learn how to crunch, but on land. So be a land cruncher.

[C]

See, just doesn't really crunch. Know what I'm saying?

[A]

So he's like, well, so we're leaving South Africa to go to Australia for a complete change. Also, we got in trouble with the South African mafia. So, anyway, go on to Brisbane.

[C]

So, you know, we want a complete change, basically what Allison works for. How dare you. I'm a working actor.

[A]

Listen, I've done two black box performances in the past three years, so, you know, don't talk to me about change.

[C]

Kiss Me dog. So one of the productions we did.

[A]

Kiss Me dog, I was actually in the dog version of kids, so.

[C]

It was still called kids. It was very confusing when people showed up.

[A]

Honestly, we got a lot of bad reviews on that one.

[C]

I'm telling you, we would have gotten better reviews had Mr. Mustofully not kept licking his own wiener.

[A]

I'll tell you, Peter Trevors actually came down to our production in jburg and said, what the hell's going on? This old dog's supposed to be kids. That was the headline.

[C]

Let me tell you, when we did a chorus kit, it was really obnoxious trying to get a bunch of dogs to line up, you know? And why was it called the chorus kit when they were all dogs? No one really understood it, but that's part of being an artist, you know.

[A]

We definitely had a hard time breaking through the audiences when we did an old clown dog version of Angels in America. But other clown dogs. But I still think it's a powerful show that needs to be put on dogs in America.

[C]

Dog. Angels in America. One dog came down with bones and it became an epidemic.

[A]

Yeah, I don't think Lin Manuel Miranda appreciated when we did Dog Hamilton. I thought it was lovely, personally.

[C]

All right, so let's get back to this. So Joe's like, we've given up our home. We've given up all career. I was like, okay, okay, Joe, you moved. You. You're moving to Australia. Let's.

[A]

Let's stop acting. You didn't move to a tree house in the middle of Guatemala, which I've also seen on this show.

[C]

And Al's like, it's now in Eva. We're gonna only be this age now. We're only gonna have this much money now. And the sunshine coats. Who knows? The Sunshine coast could be not sunshine tomorrow. What if it's the Dark coast tomorrow? What if it's the Moonshine coast tomorrow? You know?

[A]

You know, the sun's only out half the day, so it's literally. We got to go there now, because by the time we get there, the sun might be out.

[C]

So, you know, this place is crazy because it feels like the Sunshine coast is a vacation spot. And that's weird because it feels like you're on vacation when you're here. Isn't it something? But you know what? It's where you live. You're not on vacation because you live here. It's crazy.

[A]

Yeah. I'll give you a moment to wrap your mind around that. Living in a holiday destination. So Joe's like, well, there's wilderness here. It's unbelievable. I love it. I'm like, you were living in Africa, by the way. So Zoe is.

[C]

I know. The. The previous picture of your home was of an elephant, so.

[A]

You could just do that. So now we meet the realtor, who doesn't seem to. She's a relocation specialist.

[C]

She does. Not actory at all.

[A]

She's like, hello, I'm Zoe Griffin. You know what? The Sunshine coast offers a lifestyle for everyone, even clowns who dress like dogs. Dog clowns, if you will. If you're an activity or an outdoorsy person or I guess a clown person, there's a club or. Or group or part of land to do it on. You can just do it on the land. I'm like, please stop saying you can do it on the land.

[C]

Please stop doing the box step while you're talking, while you're doing your House Hunters intro. Okay, we get it. You're very dramatic. I think that this realtor knows what's her buns from the community theater or something. Allison.

[A]

Yeah, I think that she actually is the one who's like, she works at the box office, the community theater, and.

[C]

You can tell that she really wants to be the actor and not just the box. Not. I shouldn't say just the box. I'm sorry. Every role is important. Mine more than you, which is why yours is called supporting. Eh? But you can tell she wants to be an actor not in the box office, because she's like, guys, here we are meeting in a park. All right, now, let me ask you. What's the feeling we get in this home? What's the feeling? How do we want to feel in the home? Oh, okay. Actor studio. Just get me a roof.

[A]

I learned everything about real estate from Utah Hagen.

[C]

So.

[A]

So now. So Joe and Allison are with Zoe, and Zoe's like, yeah, so what are you looking for? Where do you want to do it? What do you want? Because you can do it anywhere you want to on the Sunshine Coast. So Allison's like, well, I want turnkey and modern. It doesn't have to be an actual key, because I'm actually trained in mime. So if we just go up to a door, and I could just turn my fingers and make it look like I'm turning a key. That works for me, too.

[C]

So Joe's like, well, we could live in a shed. Listen, here's what's the important part. It's got to be on land. We've got to get away from the hustle and bustle, and we're looking for a piece of land that's got good water on it, all right? That means pooper. I want a good pooper. It's. It's private, it's secluded. There's no neighbors. Similar to what? I know you've never heard this on this show, but I want something similar to what I grew up with as a child. Of course you do, you fucking man Child. Of course. What is with the men? Children on this show, every place they get, they have, it has to remind them of home. What did your mothers do to you?

[A]

I'm not saying I'm unhappy in life. I'm not saying that I'm pining for a nostalgic piece of my childhood because my adulthood hasn't panned out the way I wanted it to be. I'm just saying that I'm someone who used to go to no Doubt concerts, and now I'm a cpa. And now, all of a sudden, in the age of mid-40s, I want to grow things and live back in my childhood, so I'm really happy. And this marriage is in A great.

[C]

State and not attack away from what Joe is saying. But I mean, he is called J Crunch. So that's, you know, let's put as bad as much stock in that as we should, shall we? All right, now listen, I want to be close to neighbors, not an hour away. And we can be by the beach. You know, we could take dogs for a walk. We can grip coffee. Plus I'm hot on my right. We're in Australia. Am I right? Hold on, hold on one second. Let me put a wall between me and the seats. All right. Flatten the hands out and there's a wall there. All right, I'm gonna go down into the basement. Here I go.

[A]

Yeah. You know, it's really important for me that I be around people. I need to go to the gym. Something I really love doing is, you know, like, you know, finding some stairs and getting some exercise. And they don't have to be real. They could be invisible. I just go up and down those stairs all day long. People really enjoy that when I do that. It's mainly a downstairs rhythm. Merely go down into the sand and she's like.

[C]

And also a pool. And so the realtor is like, so what's your budget here? Pattern eye pokers. And my eyes hurt. Really? It's got very strong patterns on. But that's something, you know, I love people who can not only speak with their personalities, but also with the clothing. And let me just say, as someone who speaks in words. Ow, my eyes hurt. Right.

[A]

So. So Zoe's like, well, I think there'll be a little bit of butting of heads in terms of how. How far they're willing to compromise in terms of the land versus the home. So they get into their cars and also they want.

[C]

Their budget is 900,000. That's very important, Ben. Got to get that in there.

[A]

That's right. I'm sorry, yeah. 900. 900K. So they're in their cars and they're heading to a world renowned beach on the sunshine coast. And she says, my strategy with bringing Joe and Ellie into this home in Noosa heads is to show them that. Exactly the type of cosmetopolitan style of new saheads. You know, I think that's what Ellie is really looking for, you know, and it's gonna work amazingly well for Lucy in this cosmopolitan corner of the city. And it's just like houses.

[C]

Yeah. And the realtor's like, welcome. Here we are. Lights up. Lights up on beach home. In exterior, modern beach home. I hope I get it. I Hope I get it. How many tenants does it need? How many boys? How many? Right. There's from chorus kit. Love your work, by the way. All those dogs playing kids in a chorus line. Wonderful work there.

[A]

Yeah. You know, it's a shame because our version of Little Shop of Horrors just really didn't quite, you know, didn't really take off because it turns out people are not as excited about a man eating dog as they are a man eating plant.

[C]

So you plant that ate dogs? You know, people got much more upset than they were watching humans getting eaten. It's kind of unfair, really, if you think about it.

[A]

We got protested by Peter, and I thought, wow, this is amazing. We're actually gonna get some national news because of this. But it turned out it was just someone threw some Peter through our window.

[C]

Actually, I once did a production of Peter Dog, and we actually got protested by a bunch of people named Peter because they just didn't like Peter Pan being played by a dog. So, you know, it's the access life.

[A]

I think they also didn't appreciate that during this, the, you know, when we're singing I'm Flying, that it was just actually just. I was just walking around on the stage like a dog and pretending to pee on a hydrant. I said, I'm peeing.

[C]

So modern beach home. I was like, oh, feel so welcoming. Oh, yes. It's a community vibe. Four bedrooms.

[A]

Poo.

[C]

Obviously, living closer to the city means smaller land size, but that might be one of the. The compromises here. I want you to about it. You're not live, you're not on a stage. You're. You're in a. What do you call the round stages?

[A]

What are those called?

[C]

In the round? You're in a theater in the round, basically, everyone can see you. But it's kind of the point, isn't it?

[A]

It's like you're in fun home, but you're actually in a fun home right here. See, look, you're by the ocean, you.

[C]

Know, so fun home. Starving, starring J. Crunch. I mean, and it's kind of. Kind of fighting there, isn't it? You know, we actually did do a.

[A]

Dog version of Fan Home. Turns out people were really crying when I sing Ring of Ring of Keys. And I had it in my mouth like a little dog. Good little doggy. People like, this is supposed to be a song about lesbian love, and you turned in about a dog. We're fetching keys.

[C]

Every time we sing Ring of Keys, the dog started crying at the front door. Really awkward. Really hard to Keep an audience.

[A]

You should have seen when we did the band's visit. We actually had humans at that one. And all we dogs. When the bands showed up, we just. We all just ran up to the end. Up. Ran up to the band looking for treats. It was wonderful.

[C]

And the dog played on, let me tell you. That was a depressing one. All right, let's get on with it. All right, so beach house. And just like, what's the price of this one? $900,000.

[A]

And.

[C]

And does that include your commission? Oh, how about you let me do the work before you try to stiff me for it, you cheap? All right, let's go take a look. Let's go take a look.

[A]

So Joe's like, where the land size is very small. Not quite what I wanted in the way of acreage request. Zoe and the neighbors are very close, which is a bit of a negative for me. I'm like, negative for you? It's negative for them. They're the ones who have to, like, look out the window and see clown school happening next to the accountant.

[C]

No kidding. They've got to watch juggly breath exercise puss over here. Allison, you know, she's out there every day. Like me more mama moo.

[A]

All the world's a stage and all the. All the men and women merely players.

[C]

So, Jo, Alison's like, it's massive, isn't it? Oh, it's so cool. I already feel relaxed here. I can finally breathe out. All right, well, couldn't shoot a. Two different notions, aren't they? Would you like a stick of gum, dear? All right, now look here. There's greenery going from every single window in here.

[A]

And it's nice. It's actually a really nice house. Has, like, a nice open layout, like, modern appliances.

[C]

It's. It's nice, and it's really nice.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

This is a really nice house.

[A]

It's great. And so Ali is like, nothing has to be done. You're like, you're in the kitchen, which is where you always are when you're in the kitchen. We know when you're in the kitchen. You're always in the kitchen. And then there's, like, a lounge area, and there's an outside area. And then Lucy's in the pool. I can see her in the pool. And then I'm in the kitchen pretending I'm in the pool, miming that I'm swimming. Have you ever done the breaststroke mime? It's actually one of the easiest mimeries you can do out there.

[C]

And now I'm Flying now. I'm flying over a city. How am I flying in the kitchen? Kids, we don't know.

[A]

Hey, this kitchen island, I love that it comes with its very own elevator going down. Gotta look at my watch.

[C]

Mama will provide. Please get off the island here. I'm doing once on this island, right?

[A]

More like once going below the island, because again, miming an elevator at this moment. So Joe is like, well, this is great. It's a lot better than I expected. Wow. This is kind of amazing. Look at this. This is great. I actually love it. This is exactly what I wanted. I don't think we have to go any further. Joe, guess what? We're doing a TV show, so you have to not like something just like, perfect.

[C]

Sold. I'll take it. Yeah, it doesn't really have wilderness, but guess what? I'll grow corn in that pool. All right. I don't really care. I'm done shopping. This is it. This is the one.

[A]

So they go. The. The bedrooms are good.

[C]

The.

[A]

The. The primary bedroom is huge. It has a lot of light, and it has, like, a really big walk in robe, which I guess is slang from wardrobe. Yeah, walk in robe. That's just a robe. You just walk into it. I'm clothed.

[C]

So just like, you could. You could even get all of your clothes in here. Not that I would get any in there. Oh, I'm just a man. But there's a. There's two sinks. And realtor lady Zoe is like, I'm starting to think Farmer Joe. Oh, hold on. Let me. Let me do some hoe in here. Farmer Joe. Henry the hoe. He might not mind a cosmopolitan lifestyle.

[A]

It just goes to show that the farmer and the cowman can be friends. Oh, the cow farmer and the cowman can be friends.

[C]

So they go outside. There's a pool, there's a garden, there's a fire pit. I want to move here. Why am I living in this place? It's 5,000 degrees. Okay, did I tell you I had a centipede here the other day that was. I mean, I have a video of it. I'm gonna send it to you. It is huge. What am I even doing here? There were snakes out here. I had to call, so I had to call a snake wrangler.

[A]

Oh, God. Who?

[C]

I can't. I'm obsessed with his Facebook page. He's like, guys, no one cares about the snakes but me. Anyway, why am I. If I'm gonna deal with that? I might as move. Might as well move to Australia.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, Australia has Scary things, but like, you know, Texas is up there too, to be honest. This place looks gorgeous.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So. Yeah. And this backyard, I mean, yeah, it was a smaller yard, but it's like a bigger than a yard that I have. My yard is the size of a thumb, so I would like it personally.

[C]

So smaller, but it looks enormous to me. I mean, listen to all that stuff I just listed. Pool, garden, all those things. What's the other thing?

[A]

There was like a fire pit. There was a patio. There's everything. It's beautiful. It's like within budget, right? It's $900,000. It was right in the budget. Yeah. There's neighbors around, but guess what? Don't do anything that, like, you'd be embarrassed for a neighbor to see and you'll be fine.

[C]

Yeah, but you're not in the thick of the wilderness, are you? Location is bang on, Joe. It's just so close to what we need, which is basically a lunch. A bunch of buildings with business names on them. They could be really anything. What we call them is an escape from J Crunch. Am I right? Close to civilization. We'll take it. Yeah.

[A]

So now they got a house, too. And Joe is like, you know what? I'm giving up the seat and tie. I'd like to have a crack at living off the land. Because in South Africa, my parents owned a game farm. It was absolutely phenomenal upbringing and a privilege to live in that environment. And basically my life is a dead end and did not fulfill any of the dreams I wanted. So I'm just going to regress to childhood.

[C]

Yeah, a game farm. So that's where you're shooting them for fun. That's. That's really great, Joe.

[A]

Oh, is that what that is?

[C]

I'm assuming so. Or is the game just like gaming or meat?

[A]

I thought it was like gamey or meat. That's what I. That's what I assumed. I didn't look into it. Or they were just like farming Settlers of Catan. Like, they're literally farming games, guys.

[C]

It's just a farm, like, where they grow games. Like. Well, we just finished a crop of Scrabble. All right, let's move on. It's season of Monopoly, guys. I don't know what a game farm is. I don't know why I'm offended. I'm just. I'm just. That's how I am.

[A]

So then, speaking of game farms, you know what's funny? We did an all dog version of chess. It's very. It was a very, very dramatic experience, didn't get good reviews, though.

[C]

Yeah. So Al's like, well, I'm an actor, and I'm auditioning for an organization called Clown Doctors. So we see her. We cut to her getting dressed in a dressing room, and she's putting on the clown nose and everything. And another terrible pattern, which I love. It's. This one's tied out. I love that even when you're in character, you're like, but you know what? You need to keep one part of yourself, and that is babe Haydens. All right.

[A]

Yeah. So it's actually clowning for a good cause because it's to distract kids in the hospital from being in the hospital. So we see her audition, and she's like, hello, My name is Dr. Nincompoop. Nice to meet you. Dr. Nincompoop is so happy to be here because Dr. Nincompoop lives with a CPA. A CPA who dreams of being a farmer. Do you know how hard that is on Dr. Nincompoop? Yeah, it's really difficult. Where's my clown?

[C]

Dr. Nincompoop is just trying to go from CPA to CYA. See ya. One day she'll get enough courage, hopefully at a beach somewhere, that she'll be.

[A]

Living close to Dr. Nincompoop. Where did you get your medical degree? Oh. Oh, I didn't realize we're gonna role play that hard little girl. Okay, Well, I got my. I. I actually did a. A term at Cornell Medical School and was. Unfortunately, I couldn't deal with the weather in Ithaca, so I transferred over to nyu. Unfortunately, it was a little bit difficult for me, so I actually. It's really. The doctor is more of a. It's more of a ornamental title for me.

[C]

I'm gonna need to internalize this, if you don't mind. All right. And she's actually doing this in front of a sick kid, which is such a weird audition.

[A]

Really? Was it? Yeah.

[C]

They showed a kid in the bed, and the kids just like, oh, my God. My disease feels better for the moment, but unfortunately, I'm infected with cringe. Can somebody please get this mum out of my room? The clown knows.

[A]

Hi. Dr. Nincompoop has given me the night terrors. Do we have any medicine for that? Can I have some my morphine drip, please.

[C]

While we've got doctors in the house? Listen, I know I'm a sick child, but I would love if someone could sew up my eyes and my ears so I didn't have to deal with this anymore. All right? This should be illegal. I can't get out of this bed. And you're putting this in front of me. Is there a remote control?

[A]

So. So then Ali is basically saying, yeah, she just likes to be a distraction for these kids. And then she says, and you know what? I think that Lucy will be the most adaptable out of the three of us. She's living in nature, and she knows she's always out there with bare feet out in the woods every day. You know, she's that kind of gal. And then we just see this little girl just like. She's like Nell, just, like, bouncing around, like, in the woods, stepping on, like, a stump, prancing around. Child of the. Child of the forest. Definitely not me.

[C]

We just see her climbing a log. They're like, look at her, so outdoorsy. So the realtor is like, well, the major conflict is location. Ellie would do the coast, but Joe's just happy on the land. Joe, what do you like land tools?

[A]

Yeah. So we're gonna head to Karoiba. Oh, I love that restaurant. No, not Karabas. Karoiba. Don't get too excited.

[C]

I feel like we're sort of heading into the countryside. This feels great. And Al, Alison's like, oh, I feel like we're moving quite a distance from where I need to be. Oh, God, I just feel so much artistry behind me. Where the audience is here. Exactly. Do they even have sick children in Karoiba?

[A]

Do the actors here actually use their voices? Is there no invisible elevator or escalator available now? Strange.

[C]

All right, well, this one's on two acres. It's got two bed bathrooms, two bed beyond rooms, and it's $915,000. Now, I know that's a lot, Joe. All right, it's maybe a lot, but it's huge. Where do you see the back? I may even have a water source for.

[A]

Joe makes it sound like there's, like an outhouse back there. And I like the little information. You know, the little. The little dossier on the left is like, four bed, two bath, two acres, bottom turnkey. And then it's, like, too secluded.

[C]

Like.

[A]

Okay, okay, you don't need your editorial opinion. Just give me the stats. So they walk in, and by the way, this house is enormous. We see a lot of aerial shots of it. It's like a huge house. And you walk in and it's like this big, giant white space. And it's. It's huge. But then it's like you also have to furnish all that space. That's a lot of space to furnish it Is.

[C]

But, you know, I mean, I just love it. It's, like, so big, and it has, like, tile floors, and it's fairly new. Looking for being that big.

[A]

It's still nice. Yeah, it's nice.

[C]

It's just enormous. And Allison's like, oh, my God, you could imagine having friends. You could imagine having neighbors. It's like, no, I don't think so.

[A]

I'll just stand outside the window and be like, I'm your neighbor. I'll hold a little fence over my face. Just like that show. And then. And then Zoe's like, and look in here. There's a. Look at this dark purple room. This is for media room. It's this. It's dark when you watch your tv. Hey, listen, you've been on TV before. You're an actor, right? You've been on tv.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm gonna have to ask you to stop that right now. We talked about. We're not going to discuss. About the television career. Okay?

[C]

So let me see here. Joe's like, oh, my God, we're in the wilderness. And look, there's a beach out there. It's like a pond. It's like, look, we've also got the water for you. Can't wait to go swimming in there.

[A]

That. By the way, that pond looks disgusting. It looks like all the crocodiles are in that pond. It looks. I would never go 10ft near that pond. That is a death trap pond, if you ask me.

[C]

It is. That is like the previous owners are dead in that pond somewhere.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Like you need to drain it.

[A]

But by the way, this house, first of all, it had also an amazing stovetop in the kitchen, like, a beautiful range. And second of all, I don't know if that show Instant Hotel is still on, but this would be a great house for Instant Hotel.

[C]

Do you remember that show? Yeah, I love that. I love that. I'm scrolling through my notes a little lost, but, yeah, I did love that show. I wish I would come back. Remember the ladies from Bondi Beach? The mother and daughter.

[A]

Because my daughter's name is Bondi, because I love that beach. And then I was, like, rooting for them to win at the end, too. That's the funny part.

[C]

Well, they grow on you after a while. They almost did, didn't they? They got. They almost got really close. Didn't they win?

[A]

No, they came in second.

[C]

Let's say who won? Just in case anybody hasn't watched it. Go watch it. It's on Netflix. So good.

[A]

The Bondi Bandai and her mom are terrible. It's not that they grow on you. It's just that everyone else wears on you. Like, everyone else just becomes so awful over the course of that series that by the time it's over, you're like, just please just give it to Bondi.

[C]

Just give it to the people who are already out of the closet. Terrible.

[A]

Yeah. So. Yeah. So this big, giant house with a nice plot of land, the big bathrooms, bedrooms are big. Everything is just, like, big. There's a lot of space. I feel like they're getting a huge bang for their buck with this. With this house. I really love the first house, but this house is also really, really, really good. Like, I. I think, like, whichever one they took of these two, I would totally. I would fully support them.

[C]

Yeah. So Joe's like, I feel like a duck in water. And he's like, we could probably push the boat out on that part. No, you can't, Joe. Joe's an idiot. And also, I would not trust someone like Joe because Joe's that typical guy, is like, oh, just want to live off the land. Joe's gonna poison you. Like, he's not gonna do anything. Right. I just don't trust him. Joe. I don't trust J. Crunch to live off the land.

[A]

For me, no, I don't want my CPA to also be, like, my farming sustenance provider. So no offense to CPAs. I just feel like everyone has their lane. And if your lane is doing my taxes, I don't feel like your lane is also farming necessarily open to being changed, though. So there.

[C]

I just don't want him in charge of my well because he keeps saying, like, I want a water source. Like, he really wants a well. Those take a lot of work. Like, there's so much chemical balance. And, yeah, there's all this. I just don't trust Joe. Joe. Now Joe, get away from my well, Jay Crunch. So anyway, he loves this place, and he leaves and kicks up his heels. Like, he really loves it. He loves every place they've seen.

[A]

He loves it.

[C]

It's like, I'll take this one, too. So now they're doing the driving thing, and they're. They're talking to each other via phone in their different cars. And the realtor's like, so tell me about you guys headed this beautiful bad pet and romance star.

[A]

Well, I was traveling in England and staying at a house here with my brother, and then him and my brother were friends in South Africa, but I never met Joe. And then we went to a mutual friend of his Party. And he was like, who was that sexy lady pretending to go down an elevator? And I said, hey, who's that sexy man doing tax returns by the punch bowl? And then romance blossomed.

[C]

Then we banged in the closet, and boom, here comes it. Here comes my baby.

[A]

He said, do me, Dr. Nincompoop. And I said, sure will.

[C]

So the realtor is like, we love a good love story. Now, listen, these two, they're like chalk and cheese, but they go together quite well. Joe crunches cereal on your face. And she dresses like a napkin. Right? Match made in heaven.

[A]

Do we have any pictures of Alison dressed like a clown chef that's also a dog? No. Okay, we can work on that.

[C]

So, do you know, that is actually impressive, how many sick children have left the hospital after Allison's performed for them?

[A]

They found the wheel, the will to heal themselves and get out of there.

[C]

They didn't heal necessarily, but they did run, you know, and once you. Once you see the sick child run like that, you've got to really give credit where credit is due, you know?

[A]

Apparently, though, there's been a large uptick in. In therapy sessions around the hospital. Some. Something called a Dr. Nincombeep has. It used to be slender being used to plague all the children, but now they say something about a doctor Nincompip.

[C]

All right, so now we go to a new place. I think this one's called Duck's House.

[A]

It's at Palm Woods. I don't know if it's called Duck's House or not.

[C]

I don't know. I wrote that, so I don't know acreage. So there's that. And she's like, and this does. Now this. You do have nightbus here, but they're not on top of you. All right, this one's 20 minutes to the beach.

[A]

Yeah, 20 minutes to the beach is two bed, one bath. And this is a smaller house. And so Ali is like, oh, you're not going to tell me this is the house right here. Well, you're not going to tell me you're real actor, are we, sir? I guess we all have our limits. Anyway, the price is 850. $50,000, which gives you a little bit of cash left over to fix up the house.

[C]

She's like, I don't want to fix up a house. She says, well, it's not ready to, you know, Allison's like, this isn't ready to go. That's a downside for me. I'm married. A fixer upper. You think I want to move into One as well.

[A]

Yeah. So they walk in and there are high ceilings in this place. It's not as crappy as you would think. It's not like dilapidated, but it looks dated. It looks like it's late 90s, early 2000s or something. And compared to the other houses, it's definitely very small. But like, you know, there's, there's nice counters, I guess, in the kitchen. It's not great. It's not great.

[C]

It's just, it's the other day, and I think for the price difference, I mean, they're only really saving 50 grand, which is nothing, for the difference in the style and the, and what you.

[A]

Get for monthly payments, that's not, not a lot of, of change.

[C]

Right. And they're gonna have to put a lot more than 50, 000 work into it to make it as cute as the other places. Don't you think?

[A]

Yeah, because it's not cute. It's very generic looking. And in fact, there are. I, I saw several doors and windows that sort of had like a chain link thing going on where I was like, is the chain link there functional to keep robbers out or is it just chain link? Because someone liked the look of chain link. Either way, it was sort of not great. And we, we go through. Of course, Joe likes it. And Ali's like, you know, Joe is just like a chameleon. You know what, I'm the actor here. I'm the one who's had. Who can play different roles, but he keeps on changing one house. He's like, I love the groove. And now we're like, now he's like, oh, it's a shed. Who cares? Who cares about a house? I love a shed. You know, he's just one big chameleon who does Texas. It's very strange.

[C]

So we look at the house bathroom.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Did you like it? I think it sucks. But Allison's like, this is sweet. I'm like, it's a shitter, Allison. Where you're acting, it's a bath. It's like a plain bathroom. So she's like, there's no bathing here. And this is the worst part. To me, their daughter, this is a two bedroom. First of all, this is a ripoff. I wouldn't even move it. We've already said that. But the daughter's bedroom shares a wall with the parents bedroom, and they're both tiny. And who wants to sleep wall to wall with her parents? Gross.

[A]

Yes, it's very.

[C]

Who wants to sleep all the while with their kid? Gross. Gross on all Accounts.

[A]

And then, I mean, I guess the. Obviously, the selling point of this place is that it's got 10 acres of land, which is huge. But also it has, like, a nice patio area, but, like, not nice at the same time, because when you go outside, there's a whole big outdoor area. But, like, the. The roof over the porch or the patio is, like, corrugated tin metal, which is sort of looks very, like, ramshackle. It's so I. I feel like it's like, act. It's, like, actively ugly.

[C]

Yeah. It's like making an effort to be ugly.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So Joe's like, well, the land is fantastic. I love land. Now, the house is lovely and intimate, and it'll draw a family close together, and the price is pretty good. But you know what? I love land.

[A]

I love taking a piece of dirt and saying, guess what? This is your tax return. It's land. So, Zoe. Zoe. Even Zoe's like, I don't know. She's like, huh? Well, what is it? Everything I show them is too small. It's too big. I don't know. I'm confused. What a dramatic impasse that we're at. I'm like, stop trying to sell us on this, Zoe.

[C]

Zoe's really working hard. So we go to the family on the beach, back to the beach, and Joe's like, have you noticed the sand squeaks here when you walk on it? And they're like, now, Joe, there's a crab just stepping on.

[A]

Joe, you just stepped on an eel. J. For crying out loud.

[C]

God, they're gonna start calling you Jay Crunch even here. Joe. Joe, you stop stepping on living things.

[A]

Joe, you just stepped on a beached whale's fin. Come on. That's insensitive.

[C]

He's like, they call me Joe the Crunch. J. Crunch for a reason. We know, Joe. So the narrator's like, Joe and Alice, Joe, Allison, and Lucy are leaving their life Africa for a complete change on the sunshine coast of Australia. But Jo and Allison have different ideas of what's best for their daughter. Might I give them a hint? Not embarrassing them with your terrible clown work and your nickname from college.

[A]

Jo and Allison have different ideas for what's best for a new life for their daughter. Here's my suggestion. Send her to Sydney so she can grow up around normal people.

[C]

I'd like to just take one moment to show something with more personality than any loser in this family. Let's go back to the elephant, okay? Let's all look at that for a second.

[A]

Lucy, if you're having night terrors, about Dr. Nincompoop. Just blink one eye slowly. We'll come save you.

[C]

So they're talking about the homes 1, 2, or 3. And she. They're like, well, let's see what Zoe thinks. There's Zoe now. One is great. It's on budget. It's a nice house. I could see myself in the kitchen. I could see Lucy in the pool. Or I did once on this island. On the island. That was fun. I got rave reviews from me.

[A]

House number two, you know, it's really enormous. It's the largest house I've ever played in. It's quite literally a house I've played in. So that's exciting. And there's house number three. It's a shed on lots of land. So what's not to love about that? I love how they're doing that thing where they're like, let's ask Lucy, because she's the one who. Who matters the most. I'm like, you didn't even bring her onto the house tour. She doesn't matter at all.

[C]

No. Poor as four. Lucy, she's like. Declares house number three. Was the first thing that your mom said to me when I was naked. A lot of bush. So we get the D.

[A]

So I am my favorite song Jam.

[C]

At this point, whenever it plays, I'm like.

[A]

It's like me. Every time Postmates arrives, I'm like, aren't they going to find my door? So at this point in my mind, I'm thinking, I think they're gonna go for the giant house in the middle because it has land for farming. It's huge. It's a great deal. It's not quite as in town as what Allison wants, but it's not that far. And Allison is not giving that energy of, like, this is what I want. So I don't think the episode is gonna end, like, at the end of the day. I just want to make my wife happy. I think she's going with the flow. Sounds like this is the best deal. It's a really good house. It has a creepy puddle in the back. But, like. Like, this is clearly the one that should be chosen. Then after this, maybe they'll go for the one that's in, like, the quote, unquote, cosmopolitan one. That's what I thought.

[C]

And these idiots choose number three. And not only that one there, they.

[A]

Eliminate the big house first. They're like, that seems like a little bit too big of a house for us. So let's get rid of that one.

[C]

That was the best one. That was Definitely the best one. And they take. They get rid of the night. Well, the nicest one was the first one. The best one as far as big house was the second one. And the third one was by far the shittiest. What an ugly house. What an ugly outdoor. What an ugly everything. You're gonna share a bedroom door with poor Lucy. Lucy's never gonna make out with anybody.

[A]

It was literally the worst. I was shocked. I'm always so shocked when they choose the worst one. And yet it happens so consistently on.

[C]

This show every time.

[A]

They always take the worst one.

[C]

They literally do.

[A]

So we come back six months later.

[C]

And.

[A]

I was cracking it up. They're like, six months later. Let's see what this wild child is up to. And it just cuts to Lucy just, like, doing Cirque du Soleil on her rope swing over this bog. And she's just like. Like those legs, those arms are swirling around. She just hurls herself into the water.

[C]

This pond, and an alligator eats her. And we never hear from Lucy again. What the hell is dangerous?

[A]

Yes. This child is not me growing up, that's for sure.

[C]

Okay, so what I said about not trusting Joe to farm or do anything, this is why. This is what Joe tells us. Yep. We've been here six months, and I've already harvested 40 grams of jalapeno chili. The. You gonna do with 40 grams of jalapeno, dude?

[A]

Well, it was kilograms, to be fair, so it was a little bit more than that, but still, I don't know.

[C]

I don't know if I can speed. I don't know.

[A]

Okay, we're going to live off the land, so guess what? For the next six months, all we're eating is jalapenos.

[C]

Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. What are you going to do with all of that jalapeno? Who needs that much? That's ridiculous.

[A]

Maybe he sells it at, like, a farmer's market. It's like, not enough to sell at a farmer's market, but not enough to use for. It's, like, too much to use for yourself.

[C]

Fucking Joe. You know? It's like, oh, my God, we can finally make our own food on the land. I'm going to make jalapeno for life. Like, wow. Thank you for making an occasional topping.

[A]

Joe and Lucy's like, I love our new home. It's got docks and there's a team, and it's so big for exploring. And I've got an imaginary friend back there. But I've heard sometimes when I go into the forest. I hear a voice that says, follow Dr. Non Dinkompoop. Follow Dr. Nincompoop. And that's too scary for me. So I run back to Mummy. Although I go on the rope swing first.

[C]

The house may have been $850, but the tetanus was free.

[A]

And then Allison's like, and guess what? I got the job as the clown doctor.

[C]

I'm so sorry. Listen, I feel like I haven't said sorry enough to six children in general. Like, I'm so sorry, sick children, for what you're dealing with now. I'm like, three times as sorry. Because this is a lot.

[A]

This is. This is when you gotta say, hey, Nintendo, you gotta start donating some switches to these kids because otherwise they're stuck with Dr. Ninc. Boop.

[C]

Okay? It just takes a spotlight sometimes to really show you what people are dealing with. And I am going to go help some sick children.

[A]

Now we get to stare them off. We may have to step in here. And then it ends with Ali saying, you know what? You only have one. I'm encouraging people to go for it. You only have one life. Live it. And the last shot is her sitting on, like, some stage with a guy wearing, like, a little crown. Like they're about to do some, like, Richard III or whatever, but like, the clown version.

[C]

So that brings us to the end of this. But I was watching the previews for the next episode, which we're not really recording, but I thought it was so funny because it's just so. This show. It's a gay couple, and it's like Adu and Nerdita are taking a break from fast paced San Francisco. They've never been to Mexico, but they're going to move there. And one of them is allergic to cats, but he's going to move in with his boyfriend who loves cats.

[A]

That is so the show. That is. It's like Raul and Tommy are both on the run from Brazilian officers, which is why they've decided to move to Rio de Janeiro just to risk it.

[C]

We're next to a police station.

[A]

It's like, okay, okay, that's. Then they're gonna complain. Well, this is T class, the police station, and we are on the run.

[C]

Oh, well, thank you so much, everybody for joining us. We will see you in a couple of weeks. Bye. Bye.

[A]

Acast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend.

[B]

We all have bad days and sometimes bad weeks and maybe even bad years. But the good news is we don't have to figure out life all alone. I'm comedian Chris Duffy, host of ted's how to Be a Better Human podcast, and our show is about the little ways that you can improve your life. Actual practical tips that you can put into place that will make your day to day better. Whether it is setting boundaries at work or rethinking how you clean your house, each episode has conversations with experts who share tips on how to navigate life's ups and downs. Find how to be a better human wherever you're listening to this.

[A]

ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com.