Watch What Crappens – "Dwell Hello #506: A Fresh Start in Singapore"
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Release Date: March 13, 2025
Platform: Watch What Crappens Podcast
Main Theme & Purpose
In this episode of “Dwell Hello,” Ben and Ronnie recap a House Hunters: International episode titled "A Fresh Start in Singapore," recommended by listener Melissa. They bring their trademark blend of loving mockery and chemistry to the retelling, focusing on an Australian couple, Tristan and Michelle, whose sharp, often savage banter and “love language of hatred” drive both their relationship and the entertainment value of their house hunt in Singapore. The hosts revel in the couple's dynamic, lampooning their quirks, and gleefully riff on every scene.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Couple’s Dynamic: “Couples Who Hate Each Other, Our Favorite!”
-
Ben and Ronnie instantly latch on to Tristan and Michelle's years-long tension, describing their marriage as “positively built on shade and passive-aggression.”
-
Memorable moment:
- “Some of us are fine just being pissed.” (Ronnie, 03:27)
-
They compare the couple’s relationship origin story—falling in love as pizza shop coworkers—to a “John Cougar Mellencamp song” (Ben, 06:56) and muse on how life’s mundanity has curdled their youthful romance.
2. The Narrative Setup: From Rut in Sydney to a Risk in Singapore
-
Tristan and Michelle are moving to Singapore for his job, but their real hope is that a fresh locale will fix their relationship rut.
-
The hosts highlight the inherent doomed optimism (“If we move somewhere new, we’ll hate each other less—newsflash: it never works!”).
-
Notable quote:
- “By rut, I mean deep, deep fucking hatred.” (Ronnie, 04:17)
3. Budget Battles and the “Singapore Dream”
-
Tristan wants a “resort lifestyle” condo; Michelle is more concerned about affordability and mocks his financial reality every chance she gets.
-
This recurring argument leads to a series of explosive and hilarious exchanges.
-
The hosts roast both the Singapore market’s high cost and American expectations vis-à-vis rent.
-
Memorable moment:
- “This man puts the poor in Singapore.” (Ronnie, 04:58)
- “If he wants that lifestyle in Singapore, it doesn’t come cheap!” (Ben, 05:04)
4. The House Tour: The Three Apartments
Apartment #1 (Orchard, “The Penthouse”) [18:14 – 24:37]
- Modern and sleek but absurdly tiny (580 sq. ft.) and over budget ($3,500/mo).
- Michelle eviscerates the space (“Is there a steep ledge without a railing? Because I’d like to push Tristan off that.” – Ben, 18:22)
- Tristan insists it’s “cozy,” Michelle rebuts with barbs about waxing his back or seeing him at the pool.
- Host highlight: Stories about their own “penthouse” apartments and bad neighbors. “That’s penthouse living.” (Ronnie, 20:19)
Apartment #2 (Bugis: “The Dated One”) [32:06 – 35:13]
- Older, more spacious, but dated and without amenities, closer to Tristan’s work, within budget ($2,300/mo).
- Michelle discounts its “charm,” but both are forced to acknowledge its value.
- Ben and Ronnie predict it’ll be the winner for its practicality.
- Practical tip: Michelle checks water pressure—Ben calls this “veteran apartment hunting” advice (35:13 – 35:58).
Apartment #3 (Tanjong Rhu: “The Noisy One”) [42:30 – 43:58]
- Modern, with great view (even of Indonesia), but far from work and adjacent to massive construction noise.
5. House Hunters Deep Dives and Miscellaneous Banter
- The boys riff on everything from Chinese zodiac signs (hilarious detour 26:06 – 28:59) to their mutual fondness for pizza, with Ronnie noting, “Pizza shop relationships are made to last!” (06:30)
- They mock the couple’s “optimism” regarding the move and jab at their wedding in India, “Talk about a Katie and Tom” (Ben, 13:27).
- The psychic/numerology reading becomes a comedy centerpiece, with Tristan delighted by generic compliments and squirming when the psychic drops hints about a secret lovechild (41:15 – 41:54).
6. Decision Time: “Do We Even Like Any of These Apartments?”
- Over crab dinner, Michelle and Tristan continue to bicker, more focused on food than emotional labor.
- Michelle is adamant about needing a tub, criticizes all three apartments, but they settle on the practical second option.
- "They actually hate all three of them." (Ben, 45:33)
- Three months later, they're "making it work" and seem content enough—proof that “some people thrive on a little bitterness.”
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “Resort lifestyle? I’m already living my ‘last resort.’” – Michelle, [11:18, paraphrased by Ben]
- “The move itself is more me pushing Tristan into it because… who wants to see you sit by a pool all day?” – Michelle, [10:54]
- “Well, I like the idea of you being able to go down anywhere. But that doesn’t happen, does it?” – Michelle, [24:37]
- “This is a room of dead dreams. Love it already!” – Michelle, [35:13]
Timestamps for Important Segments
- [03:01] – The hosts lay out their love for couples who argue and explain what draws them to shows like House Hunters.
- [06:56 – 07:13] – Ben likens the couple’s origin to a Springsteen-esque ballad.
- [13:27] – Wedding certificate drama and a “Katie and Tom” comparison.
- [18:14] – [24:37] – Tour and takedown of Apartment #1 (modern penthouse segment).
- [26:06 – 28:59] – Hilarious exploration of Chinese zodiac signs.
- [32:06 – 35:13] – Review of Apartment #2 and apartment hunting advice.
- [41:09 – 41:54] – Psychic segment with fortune-teller faux pas.
- [42:30 – 43:58] – Apartment #3 and “Can you see Indonesia from here?” jokes.
- [45:10 – 46:00] – Decision-making process at the crab restaurant.
Flow & Engagement
The hosts’ banter is organic, affectionate in its snark, and full of asides—personal stories, speculative jokes (“Can I talk to the manager of the Zodiac?” – Ben, 29:41), and side quests into subjects like laundry machine mold and bizarre animal facts. Their keen eye for hypocrisy and emotional subtext (especially in reality TV couples) is as sharp as ever.
Conclusion
Ben and Ronnie deliver a hilarious, affectionate evisceration of “A Fresh Start in Singapore,” using Tristan and Michelle’s house-hunting experience as a springboard for broader commentary on relationships, expat dreams, and the realities of moving abroad. If you love watching couples who argue (but in a loving way), and hosts who turn every detail into comedy gold, this episode is a can’t-miss.
Suggestion Callout:
“If you have a House Hunters episode you think we’d love, email us at watchwhatcrappens@gmail.com, subject line ‘Dwell Hello suggestion’—ideally 30 minutes long and available on Max or YouTube TV!” (Ben, 46:27)
