Watch What Crappens

Dwell Hello #509: Sex Wax on the Beach in Noosa

Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Date: April 25, 2025

Overview

In this episode of Dwell Hello, Ben and Ronnie recap and hilariously dissect the House Hunters International episode “Sex Wax on the Beach in Noosa” (Season 156, Episode 8). The show follows Erica, a 25-year-old Canadian nurse looking to start a new, “more adult” life of surfing and grown-up living in Noosa, Australia—accompanied (and often undermined) by her surfer friend AJ and Canadian realtor Ian. Ben and Ronnie bring their signature wit, skepticism, and Bravo-influenced commentary to every odd adulting moment, questionable roommate scenario, and the eternal tension between share-house squalor and solo sophistication.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Introduction & Episode Setup

• Title Clarified: Despite the provocative name, there’s no sex—just “sex wax” for surfboards (02:54).
• Vocabulary Lesson: Ronnie teases Ben’s East Coast roots:
  • “Sex wax is what you use on surfboards. What kind of California boy are you, Ben?” — Ronnie (03:09)

Erica’s Journey to “Adulting”

• Erica’s Background:

  • Young, but already a surgical nurse.
  • Craving independence after five wild years of backpacking and share houses.
  • Wants a work-life balance, to adult and to surf—a lot.

• Debate: What Is Adulting?

  • Ben: “I think when you start really focusing on dinner parties… trying to buy your own house…” (04:28)
  • Ronnie: “You pay your rent, you go to a job; that's all I really require. So I'm like, you're an adult.” (05:00)

• AJ the Surfer Friend:

  • Described as “a stereotypical surfer dude who looks like a Lord of the Rings character… in some light, really cute… but is he protecting a ring from a monster in a volcano?” — Ronnie (05:17)
  • Their supposed “friendship” is endlessly winked at by the show's editors, but the hosts see through it:
    • “The show’s like, winking at us the whole time. Like, are they fucking?” — Ronnie (06:35)

House Hunt Recap & Commentary

House #1: The Dream Pad (Two-Minute Drive to Beach, $1,500/mo)

• Modern, Clean, Stylish:
  • “There is not a single thing wrong with it… This is a wonderful choice.” — Ben (20:19, 21:01)
• But...
  • Erica dithers over the cost; AJ undermines her excitement.
  • “He does not want her to like this. He really is… a big underminer.” — Ben (22:18)
  • Memorable moment:
    • “She’s not like a remote control, you know? She’s not built for your convenience, sir.” — Ronnie (22:29)

House #2: The Basement Suite (15-Minute Drive, $1,200/mo)

• Spacious But Distant:
  • Further from beach and “cafe culture.”
  • “I actually do think 15 minutes is a little bit… it is a little bit far away. And you are in the suburbs.” — Ben (28:49)
  • Relatable tangent: moving just 15–30 minutes away in Austin or LA can feel like social exile (29:25–30:46).
• Adulting Considerations: Erica debates if isolation means more “adult” routines—grocery shopping, barbecuing, and laundry (“Can you barbecue books? Let's try.” — Ben, 32:21).

House #3: AJ’s Sharehouse (2 Minutes from Surf/Shop, $900/mo)

• Party House Nightmares:
  • “There’s the corner we masturbate in… there’s the TV we masturbate to.” — Ronnie (37:12)
  • “There’s a drum over there, and there's a big collection of pubic hair with a hole that you pee into.” — Ronnie, satirizing student lifestyles (37:12)
• Literal Red Flags:
  • Erica: “There were campers parked on the lawn and people in and out of the bathrooms in the bedrooms constantly… that’s a pass.” (38:02)
• Air Conditioning Debate:
  • “If you’re still hot, just go outside.” — AJ (39:09)
  • “Who escapes the summer heat by going outside?” — Ronnie (39:28)

Decision Time & Financial Real Talks

• Erica, with push from AJ, crosses off the “Dream Pad” as too expensive—a decision Ben and Ronnie treat as sacrilege.
  • “There’s never been a more perfect studio… just $300 over.” — Ben (44:13)
• Math lesson: Ben breaks down how saving $10 a day could have bought her the dream apartment (44:41–44:59).
• Erica chooses the basement suite—safe, serviceable, not exciting but “adult.”

Fast Forward: Three Months Later

• Erica’s settled, has a hospital job, and starts to “adult” for real.
• “She keeps it clean. She goes, I’m able to go grocery shopping like an adult would…” — Ben (46:35)
• She’s less wild party girl, but still not a full “adult” (by Ronnie’s definition, which is mostly just paying rent).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Surfer Stereotypes:
  • Ronnie: “I feel like he likes ren faires and turkey… those big old turkey legs.” (05:45)
• On Budget Expectations:
  • “$1200? There ain’t even a McDonald’s by here.” — Ronnie (15:52)
  • Ben: (on Americans abroad) “They just always assume when you leave America, everything is cheaper.” (15:57)
• On Househunting with AJ:
  • “I came here to help Erica, but I didn’t realize how hard it was going to be because she brought a vagrant along for the house hunt.” — Ben, as Ian (36:15)
• Ultimate Sharehouse Dissent:
  • “No house with a drum set in the kitchen is ever this clean. I just don’t believe this. Like, one of their moms came over.” — Ronnie (38:59)
• Budgeting Wisdom:
  • “If she saves $10 every day in a month, she can afford her dream pad. That’s called being an adult.” — Ben (44:41–44:59)
• Final Thoughts on Adulting:
  • “I’m an adult now. The other day for dinner, I ate a book.” — Ronnie (46:35)

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment/Theme | |-----------|--------------------------------------------------------| | 02:54 | Clarifying the episode title and sex wax confusion | | 03:24 | Cohost banter on what counts as “adulting” | | 05:17 | Description of AJ and speculation on his motives | | 06:06 | Opening scenes: Erica’s motivations for moving | | 08:22 | Erica’s plans for a “better work-life balance” | | 14:56 | Introduction of Canadian realtor Ian and search criteria| | 20:13 | First house tour: “Dream Pad” | | 22:18 | AJ’s undermining of the modern apartment | | 27:04 | Second house tour: Basement suite | | 29:25–30:46| Ben & Ronnie’s tangent on living just outside the action| | 37:12 | Sharehouse horror stories, masturbation jokes | | 39:09 | The “go outside if hot” air conditioner moment | | 44:13 | Erica crossing off the dream pad and hosts’ outrage | | 46:35 | Erica’s “adult” life update, three months later |

Tone & Language

Ben and Ronnie maintain their trademark blend of affectionate mockery and deadpan recaps, consistently breaking the fourth wall, riffing on “adulting” culture, surfer stereotypes, toxic male energy, and the uniquely grimy reality of share houses. Their tone is irreverent, sarcastic, and full of Bravo-inspired pop-culture references. Their conversation flows like a live, unfiltered hangout, with honest reactions and playful judgment at every turn.

Conclusion

This episode of Dwell Hello delivers everything Watch What Crappens fans crave: a perfect mix of sharp snark, parasocial therapy, absurdist detail, and real-world wisdom (occasionally). Tune in if you love watching (and judging) people’s questionable real estate choices—with a side of tales about sex wax, sharehouse disasters, and the eternal struggle to become a grownup without giving up your surfing dreams.