We're All Insane — Episode Summary

Podcast: We're All Insane
Episode: Forced Into Child Labor
Date: November 10, 2025
Guest: Tana
Host: Unknown Author

Episode Overview

In this profoundly raw and unflinching conversation, Tana recounts her harrowing upbringing as a child forced into labor on her family’s cattle farm, her experience with parental and sexual abuse, severe neglect, and educational deprivation. The episode traces the trajectory from survival and trauma to her pursuit of academic excellence and eventual healing, providing a firsthand look at how cycles of abuse, family secrecy, and systemic failures shape and scar—but also how resilience and compassion can persist. Tana’s story is unscripted, intensely personal, and shared in her authentic voice.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Early Childhood & Family Tragedy

   • Tana was born into a large family on a cattle farm in Arkansas, relocating to Oklahoma after a family farm accident that resulted in the death of her toddler brother—a moment she witnessed. ([00:00]–[02:12])
   • “I essentially witnessed my dad run over my little brother. It was a really horrific thing to witness, especially as a four year old.” — Tana ([00:38])
   • Immediate aftermath of the accident included neglect and further trauma, as Tana was left alone with a farmhand who had been abusing her.

2. Family Structure & Dynamics

   • A controlling, abusive father and a mother similarly caught in a pattern of domestic violence and powerlessness ([03:07]–[05:17])
   • Home births, financial struggles, and deep rural isolation; little to no exposure to the world outside family and the farm.
   • “My dad was like, I can do this. And the rest of us were born at home with like a midwife. Wow. … It was very dangerous.” ([06:35])

3. Forced Child Labor & Educational Neglect

   • After relocating to Oklahoma in 2000, all children stopped going to school at age six, becoming full-time laborers responsible for dairy & beef cattle, farm maintenance, chores, and domestic labor. ([03:07]–[05:14])
   • “Our entire lives were wake up, work, serve, a little bit of sleep. That was our entire lives. We didn’t get to like, study. I didn’t do any schoolwork.” ([08:12])
   • No homeschooling; oldest sister tried to teach her to read; often failed attempts amidst exhaustion and “parentifying” roles.

4. Escalating Abuse & Psychological Control

   • Frequent, brutal physical punishment for minor infractions; harrowing example: being beaten with a hammer for not keeping horses away from hay. ([10:59])
   • The guest recounts calculated deprivation, humiliation, and “spousification”:
   • “My dad jumped out of the pickup and grabbed me and was like, I can replace you, but I can’t replace that baby calf.” ([09:39])
   • Sexual abuse begins to surface, both from the farmhand and, later, her father—emergent memories, shame, and isolation are prominent. ([13:24]–[15:47])

5. Routine Neglect & Dehumanization

   • Poor hygiene, lack of medical care, irregular meals, and explicit emotional and bodily shaming.
   • Exposure to animal abuse as both a threat and a model of “replaceability.”
   • “The level of anger that I witnessed towards animals was insane.” ([15:51])
   • Children forced to eat raw milk out of necessity; “bacteria milk saved my life.” ([76:02])

6. Attempts at Escape, Family Dissolution & Systemic Failures

   • Mother, motivated by escalating violence and grandparent pressure, escapes the marriage with the children, resulting in transient periods hiding from her ex-husband. ([26:01]–[29:50])
   • Family court and custody battles fueled by small-town bias, bribes, and weaponized accusations; ultimately, the father regains custody—leading to renewed and intensified abuse, now without the mother as a buffer.
   • “All the things that I told the judge in confidence, my dad was able to get that information.” ([39:50])

7. Continuing Abuse, Isolation, and Failed Adult Interventions

   • Despite repeated, visible injuries and attempted disclosures, school staff, CPS, and therapists largely ignore or dismiss the reality of abuse ([45:33], [47:41]).
   • Family, community, and religious complicity; the guest highlights the duplicity of her father’s public persona versus home reality.
   • “He was like, I am God on this farm… you don’t think, you act.” ([48:10])

8. Sexual Abuse & Psychological Strategy for Survival

   • Detailed reflection on years of sexual, emotional, and physical abuse; prolonged periods of being forced to sleep in the father’s bed ([57:54]–[95:02]).
   • Powerless to resist, she internalizes “play the game or kill yourself”—survival through emotional compartmentalization.
   • “He kind of, in a sense, spousified me. I was a child.” ([63:02])
   • Frequent mention of being drugged, manipulated, and parentally abandoned by those who could or should have intervened.

9. “Escape” & Academic Transformation

   • At 14, after intervention by new DHS workers, Tana is finally able to leave, re-entering formal education as a freshman in high school ([93:02]–[104:17]).
   • Overwhelmed but fiercely determined, she overcomes social isolation, academic gaps, and stigma, eventually going on to community college, and later, a university degree in animal science.
   • “I buckled down and went to tutoring every morning and every afternoon. … After a week of being in high school, I was like, I’m not going back to this.” ([104:19])
   • Notable teacher support and peer relationships—“She made school safe for me”—become new foundations for resilience ([110:04], [114:12]).

10. Cycles of Trauma and Recovery in Young Adulthood

    • Ongoing exposure to violence through family ties, and later, tumultuous romantic relationships echo dynamics from her upbringing ([128:58]–[137:24]).
    • Encounters with sexual assault, continued manipulation, and eventual breakups prompt further trauma but also spur personal boundary-setting, introspection, and growth.
    • “That was like probably one of the most liberating moments of my life. … Best thing ever. And yeah, now I’m hopefully going to get my PhD in a year.” ([150:24])

11. Finding Voice & Healing—Legacy and Future

    • Therapy, advocacy, and education become methods for breaking generational cycles of silence and shame.
    • The “gift of fear” and radical empathy: awareness of trauma, listening to intuition, and reclaiming narrative and community as superpowers.
    • “A victim with a voice is empowered. … The damn it. The worst part’s over. And now it’s all about healing.” ([157:00])

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• On shock and childhood trauma [00:38]:
  "I essentially witnessed my dad run over my little brother. It was a really horrific thing to witness, especially as a four year old." — Tana

• On forced servitude as a child [08:12]:
  "Our entire lives were wake up, work, serve, a little bit of sleep. That was our entire lives. We didn’t get to like, study. I didn’t do any schoolwork."

• On dehumanization and replaceability [09:39]:
  "My dad jumped out of the pickup and grabbed me and was like, I can replace you, but I can’t replace that baby calf."

• On community complicity [51:20]:
  "My dad, like, the way he is with people is. It’s trippy. So in public, he’s this, like, charming guy ... but then as soon as you, like, got him on his turf or, you know, tried to like hurt his image ... it was like a different human came out."

• On compartmentalization and survival [52:22]:
  "It was like, okay, so you have to play the game or you kill yourself. And that thought process started happening probably around the time I was like 8."

• On the cost of telling the truth [93:43]:
  "Every other time you all left, I literally got my ass beat because of what? Because of telling the truth."

• On reclaiming perspective and power [157:00]:
  "A victim with a voice is, like, empowered ... The worst part’s over. And now it’s all about your healing. ... Even if it just, like, inspires somebody to keep going, I’m like, that’s what’s worth it."

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:00] – Tana’s introduction & family tragedy
• [03:07] – Farm life: forced child labor, “school” ends
• [10:59] – First beating, realization of value as laborer
• [13:24] – Child sexual abuse surfaces
• [21:45] – Social isolation; siblings’ experiences
• [26:01] – Mother’s escape; family on the run
• [29:50] – Return to school; custody battle, father regains control
• [41:45] – Post-custody abuse escalates
• [57:54] – Spousification by father, sexual/psychological abuse
• [76:02] – Enduring starvation, malnourishment, and survival methods
• [93:02] – Rescue and removal: new DHS, return to school at 14
• [104:19] – High school transition, academic struggles and wins
• [128:58] – Strangulation and near-death experience
• [137:24] – College escape, abusive relationships, path to PhD
• [147:35] – Learning self-trust in relationships & academia
• [152:50] – Writing, therapy, and advocating for others
• [157:00] – The power of voice; message to survivors

Closing Reflections

Tana’s account is equal parts harrowing and inspiring, marked by a relentless honesty about the horrors of her upbringing and the complexities of trying to break free. Access to education, the power of supportive peers and mentors, therapy, and her willingness to claim agency over her story ultimately provide a path away from the isolation and silence that enabled the abuse. The episode is a testament to the resilience of survivors, the necessity of visibility and advocacy, and the enduring importance of listening to one’s instincts.

For listeners, Tana’s concluding message is clear:
Not only does sharing her story serve her own healing, but “all it takes is one little person to make you just see something differently…to know this isn’t normal.” ([156:10]) Her hope is that no matter how alone, silenced, or trapped listeners might feel, there can be hope, connection, and transformation through speaking out.

Content Warning:
This episode contains explicit accounts of childhood abuse, sexual abuse, and violence. If you or someone you know are affected, please seek support from qualified professionals or survivor networks.