Host (3:07)

So prior to that, clean bill of health.

Courtney (3:09)

Yes. Nothing. Yeah.

Host (3:11)

Okay.

Courtney (3:12)

Like, I was, I was perfectly healthy. I was, I. Every time as I went to the doctor, they're like, oh, yeah, you're good, right? I'm like, you're fine. And I third and I would be like, oh, okay, well, I'm fine. And they say I'm fine, and I'll just believe them. Yeah.

Host (3:29)

You're not gonna question it?

Courtney (3:29)

Yeah. Especially when you're young. Yes. I'm like, I'm, I'm especially like, I'm not gonna, like, question my, like, my doctors because obviously I'm like, they're the professional on this, and I'm not. So I, I'm like, oh, well, I'm fine. So. And yeah, growing up, I just had a normal childhood. I had a, it was not anything out of the ordinary. I, My parents did get divorced, which, you know, should have happened. You know, like, they just did not, like, work out. They were just. I love them both, but they do not mix well together. It happens. Yeah. So, like, I'm like, it's, it's fine. And it's, it's, it's better now. But when I, in 2019, I graduated from high school, I was just like, you know, starting my life, like, going to college and, you know, figuring what I wanted to do in this life. And I, at the time, I didn't know really what I wanted to do. I didn't know, like, what I wanted to do, like, pass, like, for a job or anything. And so I just was, I was just thinking, maybe I'll just take a gap year of, like, you know, just figuring my stuff out before I actually go to college. And, or maybe I was like, maybe I can do my generals, get that over with and then, like, figure out what I want to actually do.

Host (5:09)

Yeah.

Courtney (5:09)

And so that was like, my thought process, process of it, because I was really like, I don't know. I don't. You really have no idea what I want to do. And so I graduated in May, at least end of May of 2019. And in. Earlier that year, my, my great aunt passed away, my grandma's sister, and I. I was very, very close to her. I, Like, I. It was just not. It was somebody that was very close to me. Some people aren't very close with, like, you know, great aunts or great, like.

Host (5:55)

Like someone that's not.

Courtney (5:56)

Yeah.

Host (5:56)

Immediate.

Courtney (5:57)

Yeah. Like, you're not even, like, your cousins. It's like, it's. It's just. But our family, we were. I was very close to her. We would always go to, like, power together, and we'd always go over there to their house for Christmas Eve, you know, because they always did, like, a Christmas. Christmas Eve party, and they would always host it, and we would, like, all of our family, like, even extended, like, would go and be there, and they just loved Christmas. And so did I. And so did myself. Like, so did we. And we would always just go and spend it with them and. Yeah. And. Yeah, she died that. She passed that same year, and we. In August, they were planning on going down to Lake Powell and, you know, spreading some of her ashes around Lake Powell. Like. Yeah. Because that was her favorite place to be. And so in August, they were planning on doing that. And I. I was like, I want to go. I want. I want to be there for all my family, because I know that all of, like, the rest of my family, like, my. My cousins, aunts, uncles, and all of them were all. All going. My. My mom and my. Wasn't going because my sister was actually getting married two weeks after that trip or even, like, even after that trip when it was done, it would be like a week until her wedding. So they're just planning on staying back. And my brothers had sports that was going on during that time, so they didn't, like, end up going either. So I was just the only one that was able to go with, like, for my family. Like, I. I was just the one to be able to, you know, go for us. And I was. I was glad and, like, I was able to go because I love, like, Powell, and I love, like, all the things that you get to do there, like boat, like, water ski, water awake, board, wake, surf and tubing. I just loved all of it. I loved doing all the things that you get to do down in Lake Powell. And, like, it wouldn't get to spend time with, like, family, too. That, like, it's a really special thing for me to, you know, be there with family. Because my gr. My grandma was coming, and my grandma and grandpa were coming to, like, for, like, a couple days for, like, the spreading of her ashes and. Because obviously that was her sister, and so she came Came down. She, she was, well, she's, she's still old, but she was very old at the time. So being outside all the time wasn't with no air cond. Wasn't like, you know, a lot. Yeah, a lot for her and then, but she really wanted to be there for her sister. And I, to this day, I still very much admire my grand grandma for that. And the day where, you know, the whole stroke happened, I remember waking up and I felt pretty, pretty, like awful. I didn't feel good. I just started my monthly cycle. A monthly cycle. So I was like, maybe it's that I, I'm like I, maybe I'm just being dramatic and I, I just don't know. Like, I just.

Host (9:45)

What were the symptoms that you were feeling?

Courtney (9:46)

I just felt like sick to my stomach. I felt like not right, if that makes sense. Like I knew something wasn't right, but I was like, maybe it's yeah, like me starting my monthly cycle. My, my and because I don't have like, I always get very sick when that happens. So I just try to play it off as like, oh, it's just, it's just that.

Host (10:20)

Yeah.

Courtney (10:20)

And so my grandma and grandpa were going home that day, planning on going home. And I was just thinking, my, like I don't feel good and I, I miss home and I miss like my family. I, I'll go down to the dock where we're dropping off my, my grandparents off to their car so I can be able to call my, my, my mom and see like if I should go home or not. Because where like we parked our houseboat, we don't have any service there. And so we had, when we have to get service, we have to go to the dock to, you know, get service and you know, talk to everybody. And so I went, my aunt was taking my, my grandparents down to the, to the dock and letting them, you know, like, helping them get to where they need to go. And so I just asked, oh, like, can I join? Is it possible for me to join? And they're like, yeah, sure. Like you're, you know, you're free to like come with us. And so I was like, oh, okay. And so my aunt, my uncle, my, my grandparents, and then my, my cousin Jordan and then my cousin Scott were all like much older than me. I was at 18 at the time. They were like almost 24, maybe 25. And then the other one was like 28, 29, something like that. I, I, they are very like much, much older than me. So all, all of us collectively like, got together and went to go drop them off, and I just remember, like, feeling like, oh, I don't know. I don't know, like, what I want to do. I don't if I should go home or should, like, if I should stay. Like, me, I'll probably get my answer for from, you know, calling my mom and seeing what she wants me to do longer.

Host (12:39)

Were you supposed to stay?

Courtney (12:41)

I had, like, two more days, and then I would. I. We would be going home anyway. But I was like, I am, like, not feeling good. Yeah, not feeling good. But also, I'm, like, very homesick. I'm a person who, like, I. I get very homesick when, like, my. My family isn't there. And, yeah, I'm just like, I'm the same way. Yeah. No, like, I'm like, I love. Yeah, like, I love to be home. I love, like, Like, I would love to. When my family gets, like, you know, to be there, and I. Even though they were my extended family who I got to hang out with, and I love, you know, spending time with them, I, I. I still was like, I just miss my. My family. And so I. We get to the dock and dropping my grandparents off, and I remember calling my mom and be like, hey. And she was at, like, Costco. And I was like, hey, like, can you talk? She's like, yeah, I'm just with Haley. Haley's my sister, getting stuff for the wedding. It was, like, at this time, I was coming up in, like, a week and a half or something like that, like, two weeks. And they're like, hey, we're like, how are you feeling? How are you doing? And I was like, oh. Like, I'm feeling kind of sick. I'm feeling kind of homesick as well. And I'm like, I don't know, like, what I should do, if I should, like, go home or, like, not go home. And because I only have two more days left. And she's like, my mom was like, yeah, you should stay. You should, you know, spend time with, like, your. The rest of your fan, like, rest of the family, because we don't get together that often at that time.

Host (14:32)

Hi, guys. Just a reminder that my merch is live and you can use code INSANE10 for 10 off your order. All you have to do is go to we're all insane dot com.

Courtney (14:43)

So she was like, yeah, I'd like to be there for our family. And you only have two more days left, and they can just come home. But if you. If the sickness continues, then obviously you can come home. Like, I don't want to, like, push you, but I think. I think you only have two more days left. And you might feel better by, you know, that like the closest to the end of the day. Like, you know, you never know. And so I just thought, like, yeah, like, I only have two more days, and I love being at Lake Powell, and I, like, get to do all the things. And so I. I just thought, you know, like, I can just tough it out. And at this time, we was like, 10am in the morning, like, something like that. Like 10, 11am and I was like, yeah, like, I'll just stay. And so we drop off my grandparents. And at that time, we. It was just my. Me, my aunt, my uncle, my. My aunt, my mom's sister, my uncle, and my two cousins, Jordan and Scott. And we were just thinking, oh, like, what should we do? Should we, like, you know, two. Should we, like, wake surf? Like, what should we do? And we heard that the other boat that had some of my other family on it that were using that boat to wake surf. And so we're like, oh, like, we should do. Be the tubing boat. So if, like, anyone wants the tube, they can, like, leave off of that boat to come over here. If you want to wake surf, they can. You can go on to that, like, other boat and we can just switch off whichever, like, one you want to do. And so we were just thinking, oh, yeah, we can. We can do that. And like, I'm like, we're down for tubing. And I remember thinking, like, I'll be tubing with, like, people who are much older than me. I like, they're always. And they. They like to go fast. And I was. I was like, I like to go fast, too. And so I was like, I. Telling my aunt and uncle, I was just like, you don't have to, like, you know, slow down just for me. I like to, you know, I can keep up. Yeah, I can keep up with them. Like, I, you know, you don't have to worry about me and I'll be fine. And they're just like, okay, like, we won't do that. Like, we will just, you know, go. And then if it's not too much for you, you can just say, like, you know, don't do that. You can, like, you know, slow it down. And so I was like, okay. And so we start, you know, getting the tube out, and then you setting it up, and we start, you know, starting to tube. And then I remember we were going. And we had this like. Like a wipe, like A pretty big wipeout and where we're, like, all, like, laughing, you know, like, wow, that was, like, so crazy. Like, Like, I was just so insane. Like, that's just what we were thinking. They're like, oh, like, that was so fun. Even though we wiped out, but, you know, it was still fun to me. And so we had two tubes. We, like, one had my cousin Jordan on it, and then one of them had me and my cousin Scott on it. And then we would just jump from tube to tube, like, going, you know, like, doing your thing. Yeah, doing our thing. Like, we just, you know, playing around and. Yeah, but, like, that's what we were doing. And I remember, like, our second time after our big wipeout, we start going. We weren't going very fast at all. We're just, like, starting to go and, you know, getting, you know, started. And so I remember, like, the beginning. I just remember, like, I feeling very, very weird. Like, not. Not right at all. I just remember, like, like looking around, being like, this doesn't feel right. This doesn't feel real. Like, I don't know what's happening. I. I don't know what's going on, but I don't want to, like, worry my family. So I try to, like, not tell them, because I was like, oh, like, maybe it'll pass. Like, maybe it'll just. Yeah, yeah, maybe it'll just figure itself out. And so I just, like, you know, remember just, like, feeling. Yeah, not. Not right. I felt like all the energy was being drained from my body, like, super fast. And I just remember, like, it got so hard to, like, stay awake. And I. I was. I just was. I. I don't even remember if my cousin, like, was asking me if I was like, okay, I died. I was just so. I don't know. Even though at that point, like, what was happening. And I know that we were going very fast. And then I just remember my right arm stopped working, and so it let go of the tube. And so, like. And then I, like, crashed into my. My cousin Scott. And then I, like, flew off of the tube, which was, like, very unlike me because we weren't going, like, fast at all. We weren't, like, had no bumps. We weren't doing anything, but, like, I just fell off.

Host (20:38)

And you literally had the stroke while tubing.

Courtney (20:41)

Yeah. Yeah. Like, I, I, I got. I wiped out. I, like, landed into the water. Thankfully, I had a life jacket on, so I was able to. To stay afloat. Because if I. If I didn't have the life jacket on, I don't know if I would have been able to. I probably would have sank because I had no idea what was, like. I. I had no idea. And, like, I probably would have, like, you know, at that point, I. I was just, like, so close to, like, passing out. I don't even know what. What. What would happen.

Host (21:16)

Yeah.

Courtney (21:18)

And, yeah, thankfully I had the life jacket. And they came around my aunt and uncle, and they came and picked, like. Were trying to, like, come pick me up. Like, are you okay? That, like, you. You wiped out. And we are going very fast, like, are you okay? And I. I tried to say yes, like, I'm okay, and, like, speak to them, like, to know that, like, I'm okay, but I couldn't. I couldn't say anything. I tried to get words out, but I. I physically could not. Yeah, I knew what I want to say, but I couldn't.

Host (22:00)

Right.

Courtney (22:00)

Like, I felt like.

Host (22:01)

Did you feel like your whole body was paralyzed, basically, or was it just the right side?

Courtney (22:06)

I. I felt like everything was, like, at that point was, like, shutting down.

Host (22:12)

Yeah.

Courtney (22:12)

And so I was. I tried to, you know, say it, but, like, I couldn't.

Host (22:18)

Yeah.

Courtney (22:18)

And so I just shook my head and, like, to say, yeah, I'm like, I'm fine. And so I just shook my head yes. And they're just like, no, we're gonna need a verbal answer for, like, we need to know that you're okay. And I. But I couldn't. I couldn't get any words out. So I just. I. I just said. I shook my head, and I. I couldn't say yes. I. I couldn't say, like, no or I couldn't say anything. And that's when my aunt was like, yeah, like, maybe we'll, you know, get back on the tube, and then we'll pull you in and we can, like, yeah, assess you and, like, let you take a breather. And I, like, that's just, like, what we're. We're planning on doing. We, like, let's just. Let's just take a break. And so I try to get back on the tube from the water, but I couldn't because, like, everything was, like, shutting down. So my. My cut. My cousin Scott had to lift me back on the tube. And when I got back on the tube, like, I just remember, like, at that time, I was like, yeah, like, I need to lay down. I need to lay down. So I was, like, laying on the tube, and. And they were, like, pulling us in. And I just. I just remember, like, after that, nothing, Like, I. I passed out, like, when they're pulling us in. Because I didn't. It was just a point. I, like. No, like, everything was, like, gone. Like, I felt, like, everything.

Host (23:53)

Scared.

Courtney (23:53)

I. Yeah, I feel like I felt scared because I didn't know what was happening and didn't know. I've never felt this ever. And so I. I was like, am I dying or am I not? Or am I just, like, having, like, a weird episode, like, what's happening? And I, I. That's when I, like, passed out. And I just remember waking to my uncle, driving super fast on the water and waking to my other uncle that was on the other boat. They went and picked him up when I was, you know, out, and I was passed out. And they went to go pick him up because they didn't know what was happening with me. And so they wanted, you know, help from him as well.

Host (24:51)

Yeah.

Courtney (24:52)

And he. He is my mom's brother, so they. They just wanted some extra hands. And, you know, like, because they. When I was passed out, they were trying to, like, you know, revive me, and they saw, you know, the droop started to happen and, you know, on that one side of my body. And my aunt knew what was happening, but she didn't know for sure because she's not a doctor or anything, but she was like, oh, no, this is, like, serious. She's, like, out. And we. Because at the first. Like, at the beginning, they're like, oh, maybe she just has a concussion. Like, maybe it's up. And then they saw the droop started to happen, and they're like, no. And my aunt was thinking to herself, like, oh, this is, like, serious. So they're. They're like, we gotta get to the doc and get her some help. We had to call an ambulance. We gotta, you know, we have to do this. We have to call our mom. And, like, I have to call my sister and we have to do all this. And so I was like. At that point, they were just getting water from the lake and dumping it on me to try to, like, you know, awake me. And Because I was still out. And then by doing that, it. I did. Oh, like. Like, that did wake me, because I just remember them dumping water. And I was just like. And like, no, no, I just remember. And they're like, oh, hey, we need to stay awake. Like, like, are you okay? Like, we. We need to just, like, to stay awake. We. We can't have you going back. Like, you can't. Having you pass out again on us. And it was so hard for me to stay awake. It would. I just. I again, I felt like all the energy was being drained out like, still. And I was like, I. I can't like it. There's no way that I'm going to be able to stay awake. And I just remember my, My cousin Scott, he was like holding me and while we're on the boat and then they just can continue to dump water on. On me. And so I felt like that also had like a. They that helped me stay awake. Because having cold water dumped on you, I don't know. Yeah, okay. Yeah. Prevent it. They definitely prevents it for me. And I remember at that time, if you know anything about like Powell, it was like 12, 1pm and at that time, like, the waters are just so crazy because everyone's out doing stuff. There's like out like, you know, tubing, like, you know, like getting their houseboat, like taking it in, taking it out. They don't like, they're all like. People were like always up in doing something. So the waters are always so crazy during that time. But I remember it being just so like smooth and glass like, and like it was, it was just so crazy how. Because if it's, you know, choppy and like crazy as it would have been during that time would have been much harder for my uncle to drive fast so like they can get me to, you know, help. Yeah. Get me help. And. But it was just, yeah, like, it was like last. It was. It was. It was so clear and smooth and it. They were able to drive like much faster than they thought they would. And by for one thought that was a miracle and in its own right. And. And then my aunt, she was trying to find service. But you know, if you know anything about like pal, you only places that you can get service are dogs. Okay. And that from where we were, that was not the case at all. We were not close to a dock at all. And my Mike, I just remember my aunt trying to find service and then. And she was just like, oh, yeah, I know I'm not going to get service, but I'm going to check to see if like God is out there and you know, and like, maybe they'll give us service. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. And then, well, for whatever reason she was, she was able to get service. Like two or three bars were usually like every like 99.9 of the time, there's no service at all. And she got service and.

Host (29:52)

And that was when they were driving you on the boat.

Courtney (29:54)

Yeah. And to. To get me to the dock and get service and she was able to get service before then, and so she was like, oh, my gosh. And so she was able to call an ambulance for me. So she. She was able to call that. And. And then she was able to call my mom, who was four hours away. Four or five hours away. And then from what my mom was telling me, she just remembers my aunt being, you know, has, like, hysterical being, like, you, like, not hysterical, but, like, acting scared and being like, you need to get down here now. And I. I don't know what's happening with Courtney. She may have had a concussion, but she knew what was happening. But with me, and she knew it was a concussion, but she. She. She didn't know. It's like she. She just, like, was just.

Host (30:55)

I feel like, too. It's like, a big thing to be like, oh, she's having a stroke without actually knowing. It's like you can, you know.

Courtney (31:02)

Yeah.

Host (31:03)

Think it, but not be sure.

Courtney (31:04)

Yes. And like, she's. Again, she's not a doctor. Her fan. Like, her not. Yeah.

Host (31:11)

And it's hard because you were doing an activity, so it's like, naturally you'd think, oh, maybe something happened.

Courtney (31:17)

Yeah. And, like, I, like, I crashed into my. Yeah. My. My cousin and, like, flew off. And they're just like, maybe they hit heads or.

Host (31:26)

Right.

Courtney (31:26)

You know?

Host (31:26)

Yeah, something.

Courtney (31:27)

Something like that. And so they just. My mom was just telling me that she called me, like, called her, and she said, you need to get down here now. And she's just like, where? Where? And they're like, well, I like that we're getting her an ambulance right now. I don't know where they're going to take her, but I. Yeah, I just need you to just start heading here now. And so my mom hopped in her car, you know, as fast as she could, you know, getting stuff from home. And then I coughed in a car and was starting to drive down to Lake Powell because she really didn't know what was happening. If I was gonna stay there, if I was going to, you know, either the closest hospitals were in either Nevada or Arizona. We heard you. Nine years of bring back the snack wrap and you've won. But maybe you should have asked for more. Say hello to the hot honey Snack wrap. Now you've really won. Go to McDonald's and get it while you can.

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Courtney (32:37)

Smart move.

Advertiser/Announcer (32:38)

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Courtney (32:59)

Or St. George. Yeah, Arizona or St. George. So she's like, I'm just going to head to Lake Powell and tell. I hear something different. And we got to the dock, I remember, and there was nobody there. Nobody there. And they're just like, not even. The ambulance wasn't. The ambulance. Ambulance wasn't there yet. And they're just like, we need to find somebody. We need to find somebody. And the only. They found somebody and there was the only two people on the dock. And they're like, we need, like, like your help. Like, my. Something's happened to our niece and we. We need your help. And they came and, you know, starting assessing me and they're like, like, do you. Do, you know, like, any medical stuff? And they're like, oh, like, they were a father and a daughter and they're. They both were. The father was a. A doctor and. Wow. And the. The daughter was a nurse. That's crazy. Yeah. And so they were able to, like, you know, come assess me and, you know, like, do all these things, you know, to, like, try to figure out, like, what was happening. And then they're like, yeah, you need to get an ambulance, like, Like a life flight out here. Like, now. Ambulance here. You need to get a life light out here. She needs to. She's having a stroke. And that my.

Host (34:35)

So they knew.

Courtney (34:36)

Yeah. And the. And my. My aunt, remember, was just like, I knew it. Like, I. I knew it. And like, I. I wasn't going crazy. I wasn't going crazy. But, like, they. She needs to get to a hospital for them to confirm what. What's happening. But she looks like she's having a. Look, she looks like she's having a stroke. And so she's like, oh, my gosh. Oh, like, we need to get like, ambulance out here. And then a couple minutes go by and the ambulance arrived and they got me into the ambulance, and I just remember feeling like the energy wasn't being drained out of my body, but I still wasn't able to talk.

Host (35:22)

Yeah.

Courtney (35:23)

And so I was like, I just remember getting into the ambulance. I couldn't walk or anything, so they had to, like, you know, put me on a stretcher and, you know, like, put me in. And then actually it, like, start assessing me. I get into the ambulance, I start doing all these Things like, oh, what, what's your name? Like, where are you from? Like, do you know anything, Any of that? And then I, I couldn't answer. I get an answer like, what's my name? I. I only could shake my head yes or no, but at this time, like, I knew that all the energy wasn't being drowned out of my body. So I'm like, oh, I'm fine. I'm like, I'm fine now. Like, I'm. I'm fine. I don't need, like, all this. I feel like this, this all is, like, crazy. But I mean, to stroke me wasn't being like, oh, like, wasn't on the head, like, right in the head. Because, like, I was, like, thinking, I, I, I couldn't talk. And I'm like, I know that, like, shouldn't have been nor, like, a normal thing for me. So I'm like, maybe you, you probably did. Yeah. You need people there. Like, you need all that because you can't talk. Yeah. And this whole thing just happened to you, and you still can't talk, and you don't know, like, really what's going on. And I can't really, like, move my right side, like, my right arm, like, my right leg. I can, I can move it a little bit, but, like, not as much as you would think. And so I, I don't know. Just at the time, I was like, oh, I'm fine. I don't need all this. Like, it's. I'm fine. And then they, after they were done assessing me, they're like, yeah, we're gonna get Lifelight out here. She needs to get to hospital. And. Yeah. And then they're like, do you know where, like, you're sending her? And they're like, they're probably going to send her to Saint. St. George Regional. It's a hospital down in St. George, Utah. And they're just thinking, my, my family's from Utah. We're from Utah. So, like, they're going to be the closest hospital in St. George, Utah, so they're probably going to be sending her there. And they're like, okay. So my, I. My aunt called my mom, and they're like, they're going to be sending her to St. George Regional. The life. Lighting her to the hospital. And so that's where you need to go. And my mom was like, oh, my gosh. Like, that's, that's so far away. Like, I'm gonna be driving for four hours. Like, she's gonna get there and have nobody at the hospital because my uncle was who was with me at Lake Powell. Like, tried to ask the life flight if. If the Ish. If he could have come with me. Because I remember at the time he would. It was. He promised me like, while everything was happening that to not like, leave my side and not, you know, he would, you know, do everything in his power to not leave me. And they. They just were like, no, it's like already too full with everybody on board, like all like the paramedics on. On flight. And it's just. It. It's not gonna go. It's not gonna work.

Host (38:45)

And how long was the flight to the hospital?

Courtney (38:47)

It was like an hour. I feel like.

Host (38:51)

Okay, so it was far.

Courtney (38:53)

Yeah. And like, I don't think maybe 45 minutes. I. It was a very fuzzy to me, like, Like, I don't know, but I just remember it not being like a super quick flight. I really don't remember how long it was, but I'm thinking maybe 30 minutes to like 45. 30 minutes. 45 minutes. Something around there. So my mom had the bright idea to call my, My. My aunt, my. Her sister that. Who lives in Vegas and Vegas from St. George is like an hour and a half and St. George sub where I live, Syracuse is like four hours. And so she had the ride I did to call her her sister and to get on the phone and be like, you like, something's happened to Courtney. You need to like head there right now. She needs somebody there with her while everything is going on, like, while everything is happening. And so my aunt drops everything and you know, head starts heading to St. George. And I just remember being like the, like my, My uncle, he was giving. Trying to give me a blessing and he was asking if anybody. If anybody out there was a. Like holds the priesthood that could help him give me a blessing for my time and need, you know, to be able to feel comfort, feel peace. And holding the priesthood means that you like, like, are given the like the ironic priesthood, the Melchizedek priesthood. In this case, I think it's the Melchizedek priesthood that you need to like, need to hold to be able to help give me a blessing. And so that's like the highest, you know, on like, highest thing that a person can hold in our religion. And it, It's. It's not something that you. You can get like, very easily. It's something you have to like, you know, continue to work for. And my, My. Two of my, My cousins at the time, the. My Jordan and Scott weren't didn't hold The. The priesthood at that time, so they weren't able to, you know, help give me a blessing. But when he asked if there was anyone out there and one of the Lifelight paramedics was. Was like, I hold the priesthood. I can help you give your blessing. So they both gave me a blessing while I was on the stretcher and before I got into the. The helicopter and the life flight. And so I just remember him, I. He just telling me, I. I can't go with you. I can't. Like, I know I promised to be with you, and. But I. I just know that they need to get you somewhere safe and we need to get you help. And they. That's what they're gonna do. Like, I'm like, I. There's no room for me. And I. I bet your. Your mom's on her way. I. I will. You know, because we still had everything on the boat. We. I saw all my stuff on the boat. Like, all, like all my. My suitcase on, like, everyone's suitcase because there's so many people, like, so many. We like food, you know, suitcases, like pillows, like. Like, we had so much stuff on the boat that were. They had to go clean the. And the houseboat off and then do all those things. So they. They couldn't just, like, leave it.

Host (42:46)

Yeah.

Courtney (42:46)

You know, leave it out where they were. So they're like, we. We have to go take care of this, and then we can. After that, the men can. We'll come see you. And I just remember being like, okay. And then I. I just remember getting into the. The life flight and looking out like, like on the mountains and remember, like, thinking, still, I'm fine. I'm fine. I don't need all this. I'm like, I'm. I'm. I don't feel like I'm gonna pass out anymore. I don't feel like. Like feel like anything. Still couldn't talk. Still couldn't move my right leg or right arm. But I'm. I was thinking in my head, yeah, I'm fine. And I don't know why I thought, like, I'm like, I'm fine, but I just was crazy back then. I don't know. I don't know. But still was like, thinking. I just. They're. With all the. Like, they're working on me. I'm like, I don't. That I don't need all this. Yeah. And then I remember, like, actually, like, focusing like, on my right leg and arm. Like, I was like, oh, I. I can't actually move my Right arm. This is one, like, the first time I was noticing, like, oh, I can't actually, like, move it. I. This is so weird that I'm not able to move it. Move these. Both of both extremities that I have, and I've always been able to use. I'm like, this is. This is not right. And I'm like, this is like, what's happening? And then a couple minutes go by, and then I just remember moving my right foot and, like, just a tad bit. And I just remember. That's when everything, like, clicked in my head. I was like, oh, like, I'm not fine. Like, I'm. I'm in, like, I'm in a life flight right now. I'm getting worked on by these nurses, these doctors, these paramedics. Like, you. Like, I'm not right. Like, what. I. What just happened? And that's when I, like, started, like, to freak out. Yeah. Panic. And I just remember, like, crying. And I started to cry and, like, freak out and, like, be like, what. What's, like, happening to me? And that at that moment, like, after I realized that, like, everything clicked. That's when I was able to start talking, but not. It wasn't coherent at all. Okay. And so I was trying to, like, talk, but it was a. Like, people weren't understanding what I was saying, and they. They were just. Bless their hearts. But they were trying so hard to, like, decipher what I was trying to say. But I. I'm like. During that moment, I wasn't. I was, you know, trying to talk, but I couldn't, and I had a droop, and it. It just was not coming, like, coming out. And they're like, oh, we'll get you to help. We're getting you to help. And they're just trying to calm me down.

Host (45:52)

Yeah.

Courtney (45:53)

And I just was. I. I was just not having it because I was like, I. At this very moment, I was like, why was I able to. Wasn't able to talk until now? Like, why? And then why is nobody understanding me? Why, like, what would I. I was just very, like. It's frustrating. Yeah. Very frustrating because I was trying to, like, talk and, you know, say stuff, and they weren't understanding what I was trying to say. And I was. I was. It's very frustrating when. Whenever that happens, because if, like, you were speaking another language to somebody. Yeah. And they're just like, huh? And you're just like, like, what. What. What am I. You. I even can't, like, you can't, like, communicate with anybody. So. Oh, yeah. Freaking out. Yeah. I just remember getting to the hospital and I just remember them like rolling me into saying. Oh. I just remember Saying like an 18 year old, you know, had like an accident, like, you know, and they rolled me to the er. They were assessing me in the er. And I remember this one nurse was, you know, carrying, caring for me so much and I, you know, I just, I just felt like she, I had a maternal wave go over her because I, I felt like, no, this isn't any, any kind of nurse. She was actually scared for me and like, you know, wanted to be there for me because I, I, again, I got there all alone.

Host (47:38)

Yeah. And so you didn't know what was happening?

Courtney (47:41)

No. And she didn't know who I was, but she, her maternal instincts kicked in and she was just being my mother when my mother wasn't there and they were still assessing me. And then I remember calling my, getting my phone like, getting my, like my dad on the phone on FaceTime. And I don't remember who called them. Yeah, I don't know who like did all that, but I was just, I remember seeing when I'm like, I start like again, sorry to freak out. And I was like, like, I don't, don't know what's happening. I don't know, like what's going on. And he just was like, oh, like some, something really wrong happened. Like something has happened that is not good. So. Yeah, I just remember talking to him for a little bit, like, trying to, you know, talk to him at least, even though, like my words weren't coherent and you know, I knew what I wanted to say, but I couldn't get the words out. And I, I, that was very, that, that in itself was very, very frustrating because when you knew when you know what you want to say but you, you can't physically get the words out and like say, like say sentences.

Host (49:04)

It's like your body's going against itself.

Courtney (49:06)

Yeah. And it, and it's like, you like, I, I knew how to do this like an hour ago and I can't do this. Like, it's so weird to not be able to do this.

Host (49:20)

It's scary.

Courtney (49:21)

Yeah. Like, it's nothing that I've ever, like, experience. Yeah. And I, I just remember being so frustrated at that that we could, I couldn't get any words out and. Well, I couldn't, I could get words out, but I couldn't get, like it wasn't coherent and he couldn't understand what I was trying to say and so I couldn't speak sentences because it like, was all jumbled in my head and I was like, I don't know how to like, speak sentences. So, like, I would only say one word if I wanted to say something. And so like, I had, or like, even to write. I had to write with my left hand because I'm a, I'm a righty. But like, this hand was not, like, this arm wasn't working, so I had to like, right with my left. Yeah, right words. What I was like, actually like trying to say. So I remember being in the ER for like 30 minutes at that time. And then my aunt who lived in Vegas came and I would. She was there and I just, I just remember being like, oh my gosh, like, I have, I have somebody now. Like, I have somebody there that, you know, I, I know. And I just remember her being there and they're just saying, oh, we're going to take her for ct. We're going to take care for an mri. We got to figure out, like, what's going on. We have to confirm like, what's, what's going on. And so they got me to a CT that we did the CT and then got me to the mri. And I just remember being in the MRI machine and it's super loud if you've ever gotten one. It's like very loud. And like, at that time I was very scared of like, you know, the situation. And that just made it like an. At the all time high because you're in this like, tube. Yeah, tube that like, goes around and like is very, very loud. And it's not a quick, like, procedure. Like, it's, it takes a bit. And so I, I just remember like crying and then having them like, you know, tell me. Oh, like, you. When we need you to calm down. But I was like, trying to like, like calm down. But then like, I wasn't, you know, it was just a lot. And so they had to like, do things like over and over again because I still was like, you know, freaking out. And so they had to like, do things like, over and over again. And, and then once they were done, I remember like going out of the Mr. MRI and then that's when I first saw my mom. She, she was there and I again, I just started freaking out and like crying and then like, I don't know what's happening. And then my mom just saw the droop and she's just like, oh, my gosh. I don't. Oh my gosh, like, what, like what, what's happening? And she Just saw, like, how I can talk. I can. I can talk, like, coherently. Like, she was like, what? Like, she was just. We were just talking on the phone.

Host (52:41)

Yeah.

Courtney (52:41)

Earlier today, like, and, like, what happened? Yeah, what happened? And they get me to an ICU room, and I just remember doctors, like, nurses, like, so many of them filling my room.

Host (53:00)

Yeah.

Courtney (53:01)

And also.

Host (53:01)

Because you were so young.

Courtney (53:02)

Yeah. Like, what the heck?

Host (53:04)

Yeah.

Courtney (53:05)

And they were like, is. Is she on birth control? Is she on birth control? And then she's like, no, she's not on birth control. And apparently that can cause what? Birth control can cause clots that can, you know, travel up to the brain and you can have a stroke from, you know, so scary. From birth control. And so. But then. So that's why they were asking, is she on birth control? And my mom's like, no, she's not. And so she. They were just thinking, oh, like, then what. What happened? Like, why did she have the stroke? But, yeah, back to all this. All the. The doctors, the nurses, the. So many people, like, just filling my room all at once. And they. They just sat. You know, had a. Try to sit my mom down, and they're like, hey, like, can we, like, talk outside? And so I. They took my mom outside, and that's when the. They said we. You know, we looked at the mri, we looked at the ct, and it looks like she had a stroke and it's the clot. We. She had an ischemic stroke.

Host (54:25)

Stroke.

Courtney (54:25)

Which means that what. It was a blood clot that cut off the brain's blood supply and get. Or hammer. Hemorrhagic that you can have. You can also have a hemorrhagic stroke. That means that the brain is bleeding and. But it was just the. A clot went up to my brain.

Host (54:49)

So do they know what caused the clot?

Courtney (54:52)

Yeah. Okay. No. Well, at the time. No. Okay.

Host (54:55)

Because they just knew it was from a clock.

Courtney (54:57)

Yeah.

Host (54:57)

Okay.

Courtney (54:58)

This. Knew there was a clot was in my brain. And that's, you know, ultimately happened. What happened? And my mom just was just so, like, in shock. Like, she just told me, like, she just fell to her knees, like. Like she couldn't believe what she was hearing. What they were telling her. And they were asking, like, how did she have the stroke? And they're just. We're like. We don't know ultimately, because we. Why we asked that she was on birth control is because birth control can cause clots, and that can travel up to the brain.

Host (55:33)

Right.

Courtney (55:35)

And she's not in birth control. So we're just, we're like why does she have one? So we're, they're like we'll do everything we can until like to figure out like what, like why she had the stroke. And I, if you get to the hospital in time, like I think six hours after, like six, like before six hours is like the max. You can get this medication like it's called TPA or TKA or something like that you can take and it can reverse all the, the defects that.

Host (56:18)

Wow.

Courtney (56:19)

That stroke caused. Okay. And. But my timeline since I had to be you know. You know, driven by boat, looked at and assessed. Yeah like assessed at like the, at Lake Powell and again also assessed and looked at Lake Powell and then being flown and then looking look being looked at and then assessing the ER and then, then going to do all these tests and then, then at that time I was past the six hour mark. So I wasn't able to get that medication that could reverse all these defects. I was, I was, it was too late and they were just saying like it was past that mark and we like we, we don't know exactly when she started the stroke. So like we can't give the medication to her. And my mom was still like in shock and you know, she didn't know how like how to handle it. My, and my, my dad and my, my stepdad were driving down separately from. Because my mom left when she found out like what was happening and she left before. Like my, she said that if it's nothing, I don't want you to come if, if it's nothing but if it's something that I'll give you a call and I'll give you know, her dad a call as well. Some she called my, my stepdad and my, my dad and saying like you need to get down here and they, my stepdad and my dad weren't like all on the best of terms because you know it's like when they did get divorced and yeah they just like it's weird and like it's just you know, they, they. He didn't. My, my dad didn't like my stepdad because you know it's just how it goes and I just, I just remember them telling me that like they just got into the car, started driving and then like they started to talk and I actually like cry and you know having to heart to heart because you know about like this whole situation was like so much for both of them because I've had my, my stepdad in my life since I was 11. So at that time, eight years. And I've had my dad in my life forever. So, like, both of them, like, I. I just love dearly, like, so much. And so, like, it was just hard for them to, like, to hear what was, like, actually going on. And they were able to, like, drive together and have no issues whatsoever. And so I would. That in itself, I feel like, was a miracle, you know, having them just like, being like, so softened. They're like, their heart enough to, like, come together and be like, I. Like, we will get through this together. And I just remember that night, like, after my stroke happened and like, I was there, I. And my. My dad and my stepdad got there and I just. All I wanted, you know, was water. I wanted water so bad. And I was trying to say, like, water, like, because I couldn't say, like, I want water. I didn't know how to speak senses, so I had to say water. I had to try to say water. Like, there's like, videos of me because a nurse told my mom to document everything from now and everything from now until, you know, a couple years go by because. So I could look back and see my progress and see how far I've come. Because obviously I'm gonna have to, like, go through rehab. I'm gonna have to go through, like.

Host (60:35)

So when you have a stroke, it completely is resetting. Like, like everything.

Courtney (60:39)

Yeah. I had to relearn how to talk, eat, swallow, a walk. I couldn't, like, I really couldn't. I couldn't even walk.

Host (60:50)

How long did it take you to relearn those things?

Courtney (60:53)

Like, to the point where I was able to be like, on my own, like, don't need nobody in like two years. And it took me, like, having to do rehab for like, those two years, like, non stop. Because I did rehab in the hospital, like inpatient rehab for like three, like three times. So occupational, speech and physical therapy, all three, each one, one hour a day. And so that would be three hours each day. And so they would just come to my room and they're like, all right, that's your time to do your rehab. And so I had, like, had to do that every day, no breaks. And yeah, the. They're just saying, like, we. We ought to get her, like, after she's. That after she's like, able to get out of the icu, we need to transfer her to, like, a rehab center, like a neuro rehab center, so she could do inpatient rehab. And my mom, like, like, like, okay, I'll try to, like, do some research and like inpatient rehabs, inpatient hospital rehabs, neurorehabs that are close by where we live. And so she was just doing that, doing her research. But yeah, I was. That first night, I just remember, like, wanting water so bad. Wanting water so bad. And I was finally able to get the word out, like, water. And then they were able to get me some water. But then I, like, started to, like, cough it up. I couldn't swallow. I couldn't swallow. And that's when they, like, realized my. I could, like, my swallowing ability was also taken.

Host (62:55)

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Courtney (63:22)

Now.

Host (63:26)

Kids, they grow up so fast. One day they're taking their first steps, and the next, they don't fit into the tiny sneakers they took them in. You blink your eyes and their princess dress is two sizes too small. And their dinosaur backpack isn't cool anymore.

Courtney (63:41)

More.

Host (63:41)

But don't cry because they're growing up. Smile because you can profit off of it. For real. There are a bunch of parents on Depop looking for the stuff your kid just grew out of. Download depop to start selling.

Courtney (63:56)

And so I had to get a feeding tube because. Because I need to get, like, you know, nutrients, like water in me, but I couldn't swallow, so they had to put a feeding tube in. And I was. The feeding tube wasn't for like a week, week and a half. And because until, like, I, I had to do re. Rehab to, you know, learn how to. For those muscles to, you know, start to work and how to do, like, all these things, like, blowing into, like a, like this thing. I don't. I don't even know what it was called, but, like, this rehab thing, I had to blow into it and then I had to, like, swallow, like, swallow, like, my spit. Like, trying to learn how to, like, actually, like, using those muscles. And yeah, I was just trying to drink the water and I, I couldn't. And I was, like, so upset. But then I remember just thinking, I just, I. I want to walk. Like, that first night, I was like, I just want to walk up, like, prove to anybody, like, everybody, like, I could walk.

Host (65:01)

I can, like, and probably for yourself too.

Courtney (65:03)

Yeah. At that point, it's like, I just.

Host (65:04)

Want to get out of here.

Courtney (65:05)

Yes. I just want to like, you know, walk and then so that they're like, oh, like, oh, like, okay, we can try to like get you to walk. And so I, my mom just said to me, like, she just remembers me ripping the cords out, like out from the wall that was connecting me to all these stuff. Like my IV is like my, my heart monitor, my, like all. I ripped everything out. And so then they got me a walker and then I just started to walk. And you know, I was, you know, emotional at the time because again, I wasn't the same. I, I couldn't walk the same. I. It was very hard for me to walk and I was using a walker too. And I, I had to like two CNAs with me by my side, you know, helping me to walk. And I just remember being like, oh my God. What? What? Like, I, I don't understand, like, why, like, why what? What's happening? Like, why can't I walk normally either? Like, like everything's not right. Like, everything has just been. It has changed everything.

Host (66:21)

Yeah, in a second.

Courtney (66:22)

Yeah, in a second. And it just like became so, like, became too much for me. And so like, that's when I started to cry and like, again, just a lot for me. And yeah, I just started to walk and I have a video of me trying to walk and all that. It's, you know, me like crying because I can't walk normally. And it was, yeah, it just was too much for me, too much for me to handle. I was 18 and I, I thought that I had my whole life ahead of me. And now I'm, I'm childlike again where I had to learn, relearn how to walk, talk, eat like everything. And I didn't know how to handle that at the time because I'm like, again, I was. Even though I was 18, I was, I'm. I'm just a kid. I was barely 18, like two months of me being 18 and I was like, I'm. I. Even though I'm considered an adult, I'm not an adult. There's no way that like you. There's no. I still, I'm 24 now. I'm like, I'm not, I'm not an adult. I'm still, I'm a 24 year old teenager. I'm like, I, like, I'm still.

Host (67:49)

There's always so much to learn.

Courtney (67:52)

Exactly. So I'm like, I'll probably be married and have kids where I'll probably be like, I'm not, I'm no adult. I'm like, I'll Probably. I don't even know when I'll get to that point where I'm like, yeah, I'm an adult, but. And, yeah, at that time, I definitely did not feel that I was an adult at all. And they, you know, got me back to my room, and I was able to rest, but then they were just trying to figure out why I had the stroke in the first place. Because usually people who have this kind of stroke where blood clot goes to the brain and cuts off the blood supply, it's usually an older person, like an elderly person that has a stroke. You. You only hear people who are, like, older have these types of strokes. If the. Because usually this doesn't happen very often. But people who might. Or my age or younger that have strokes, it's usually from the brain bleeding. Okay. And. But I had the clot, so they didn't. They're like, why? Like, why. Like, she's not on birth control. She, like, why is she, like, had this. You know, why. They're trying to figure it out. And, you know, a couple days go by, and I started. My brain started to swell, and it almost got to a point where my brain was starting to swell so much that they were. I. They almost took out a piece of my skull to let my brain continue to swell and. But have, like, room for it to, you know, continue to swell. Because the, you know, at that point, like, I, like, with. When my brain started as well, I lost all, like, ability to move. Like, my. I was able to move, like, like, a little bit of my right. A little, like, right leg, a little bit of my, like, right. But when my brain started to swell, that's when I lost everything. It couldn't move it. I couldn't move it at all. Like, my right side was paralyzed.

Host (70:11)

And I'm sure that was even scarier, too, because then you're like, I'm.

Courtney (70:15)

I'm here.

Host (70:15)

I'm supposed to be getting better.

Courtney (70:16)

Yeah. And then it feels like you're, like, digressing or, like, even worse. And. And so I'm like, what? Like, I'm losing, like, everything. And then they're just like, doctors were there trying to assess me. And then a nurse that was down in the er, I got my mom's number and was like, you know, because she had that maternal instinct being like, hey, if you, like, you need anything, you can text me. Like, you can. You can call me with anything that you need. And. And also, like, I had this stepmom, and that was a nurse, and so my mom, like, was you know, friends with her as well. And so she, like, got on the phone with her and she said that if she starts losing all ability from her brain starting to swell, there's a medication that they can give her to, you know, not like, to have it, you know, calm down and, like. Like, lose, like, all of her ability.

Host (71:31)

Yeah.

Courtney (71:31)

And then. So they weren't giving this medication, but I've, like, lost everything. And. But we were just so confused. And my mom, I was talking to the doctor and was like, why aren't you giving her this. This medication? Like, why? She's like, well, she's not really, like, losing any ability, really. And she's like, yeah, she is. She was able to move her right arm and leg, and now she isn't. Like, she's lost everything. So you give that. Her. Give her that medication now. So. And they gave me that medication and they calm everything down, and my brain started to, you know, to unsoil or, like, you know. Yeah, go down. Yeah, go down. And so they didn't have to take out a piece of my skull to, you know, let it.

Host (72:19)

Wow. Like, that's crazy. Yeah, they had that. You guys had to tell them.

Courtney (72:23)

Yeah, exactly. And so they're like, yeah, like, she hasn't lost any ability, so it's fine. But my mom was like, yeah, right, she did. So we, like, I was like, you know, thankfully that I got that medication. So they were trying to figure it out since, you know, birth control was out the. Out of the picture. They're like, we just need to, like, do some more tests and, like, trying to figure out, like, why she had this type of stroke. And then, like, the next day, that's when I started to run a fever and really, a really high fever. And they're. They're like, the doctors were thinking, she has an infection somewhere. She has an infection somewhere, but we don't know where it's coming from. We have to figure this out. Like, they did some, like, tests or whatever, and they're like, yeah, like, she's septic. She's septic. And that means that, yeah, like, I have an infection in my blood, and some, like, some of, like, it can be fatal. Sepsis can be fatal sometimes. And so they're like, we need to, like, figure out, like, where this infection, like, where it's happening and so we can figure this out. Like, and, you know, she doesn't. This doesn't end up fatal. And so they were, like, discussing, and they're like, like, let's just, like, look, like, closer at like, her heart. Like, let's just look closely at that and, like, see maybe if that's, like, where the infection is happening or coming from. And so they. They did, like, the scope and where they put me to sleep, and then they put this camera down my. My throat and so that you could, like, fully, like, have a closer look at my heart. And because they didn't ultrasound, but then, like, they said it was fine, but then they're like, we need to, like, actually look at it, like, closer. Like, not just an ultrasound. We look at it closer. And so after that procedure, you know, happened where they look closely at my heart, but this little camera down my throat, that's when they found out that I had two holes in my heart that I had never known about. Never known about. And they were saying, yeah, she has two holes in her heart. One which is a pfo. What's they call it? It's called a pfo, which essentially everyone has. It either closes or doesn't when they take their first breath of life when they're born. Either closes or it doesn't. And it. You can have, like, a full life with no complications if it doesn't close. It was just the problem was that the other big hole in my heart, it was an esd. That was the problem. That. And they were, like, right next to each other, too. And that's when they're like, yeah, this is probably why she had the stroke, because blood clot was traveling through her body and then went through the. Both those holes and then went straight up through your brain.

Host (75:42)

Okay.

Courtney (75:44)

And so, like, this is probably, like, probably the cause of the. The stroke. And if we wouldn't have found these holes, she would have been in heart failure and drop dead by the time she was, like, 35. 30. So, like, it's crazy. Yeah. Like. Like, I know this is, like, a weird thing to say, but, like, like, they were just saying that it was, like, a blessing. Yeah. A blessing in the size. Yeah. And so we were like, oh, awesome. Like, like. Or not awesome that she has these holes, but, like, thankfully we found, like, the reason why she had this joke, and thankfully we were able to, you know, fix the problem. So.

Host (76:35)

Did you have to get surgery on your heart?

Courtney (76:36)

I did. So, like, after a month after I got out of the hospital, I got. I had to have heart surgery.

Host (76:44)

And they close both holes or just one?

Courtney (76:46)

Both. They closed it because they were able to put the. The. The device. Because there's a device in my heart now, but they were able to close both of them. And not like, then, like, they were able to close both of them at the same time with closing.

Host (77:04)

How was that surgery?

Courtney (77:07)

It was like, I remember, like, them putting me to sleep, but, like, I remember not fully being asleep. I. Like, it was weird. It was like in and out, in and out, but I didn't feel anything. But like I said, I was like, I'm awake and I. It's like a weird feeling when, like.

Host (77:26)

You, like, you had to recover from the stroke and heart surgery. Yeah, at the same time.

Courtney (77:33)

Yeah, heart stroke, heart surgery, and, like, being septic. And so they had put me on, like, major, major antibiotics so that, like, I. That were giving to me in this. In this PICC line. That. A PICC line is like, essentially like a bit like a tube that goes straight to your heart and administers the. The antibiotics. But it's like this tube that goes from my arm and goes all the way to, like, my. My heart. And it. It's like, essentially like a. Not like a permanent iv, but, like, because you can take it out, but, like, you don't have to, like, keep. You know.

Host (78:24)

Yeah.

Courtney (78:24)

You know, it's just there. And so I had that. I had to get that procedure, so I was able to, you know, have that PICC line as well, because that is. It's an easy procedure, but, like, it's still a procedure. And so, like, I had that and, like, I had to recover being from being septic and having all these antibiotics, like, put into my body. And. And that's when, like, I. I remember being neural rehab and from all these antibiotics, like, putting my body. It was killing the. The, like the bad bacteria, but also the good bacteria in my body. It was killing everything. And so what happens is, like, the longer you stay at the hospital, the more likely that you're gonna get sick. So I got sick again in the hospital because, again, the antibiotics was just killing everything.

Host (79:21)

Yeah.

Courtney (79:22)

And so, like, the. Ultimately the bad in the hospital took over. And that's where I got C Diff. C Diff is it's like a intest. Like an intestinal and test. Am I saying that right?

Host (79:40)

Intestinal.

Courtney (79:40)

Yeah, intestinal disease.

Host (79:42)

Yeah.

Courtney (79:43)

And it just, like, like, causes you to, like, feel pain in your. Your intestines and, like, go to the bathroom constantly. Like, and, like, I remember, like, going to the. To the bathroom every two minutes because I. Every two minutes I couldn't sleep because I had. I had to go to the bathroom, like, every two minutes. Like, every time that I would come back into my bed, like, walking with my iv, Like, IV Pole. Getting all that settled into my bed. I'll be in there for, like, two minutes, and I'd be like, I have to get back up again. And my mom had to, like, oh, like. Like, she had to help me because I couldn't walk by myself. And so she didn't get any sleep either. So I also got that, too. And that was so painful in itself where I'm like, there's just so, like, so much that has happened where I'm like, I just want to, like, die. I'm like, I. Please. I'm. I'm like, this. Like, this. It's too much for me to handle. I'm. I'm like, I just would rather you just, you know, take me out and, you know, we can call it a day. Because I'm like, I don't know if I could, like, live with this. And they couldn't figure out what's going on with me either. With the C Diff before, they were like. Like, I was sick. And then they're like, what's happening with her? And they're just like, I don't know what's happening. Like, they're trying to figure it out. They're doing all these tests to see what. What's happening. And then my. My mom was telling, like, the nurses, like, my. My stepmom, who was a nurse, and then the other nurses that we grew. Grew close to at St. George Regional, because at that time, I was transferred over to imc, which is in Murray, Utah, which is, like, a. Like, 45 minutes away from my house. But she was like, I don't. Like, she's so sick. We don't know what's going on, though. And then, like, explaining all of her, like, my symptoms, and they're just like, she has C Diff. That sounds like C Diff. Like, have them check for Sita. And she was like, oh, okay. Like, then I'll tell, like, the doctor and, like. Or the nurse is like, this is what they need a test for. And so she went to the doctor and said, oh, you need a tester for C Diff. And that's probably what she has. And they're like, yeah, I don't think she has that, though. Like, it's like, it doesn't. It just doesn't make sense. And I. I really don't think she has this. And then they kept doing, like, all these other tests and couldn't figure. Still couldn't figure it out.

Host (82:40)

And of course, that's what it was.

Courtney (82:41)

Yeah. And, like, still gonna Figure it out. And then I. I, like, at that point, like, I. I could not eat. I could not, like, I could not drink or anything. I. I was like, I wanna, like, I. I wanna die. Like, it's too painful. And then my mom was, like, so fed up. It was like 4:00am of me just, like, staying awake because I. I couldn't, you know, sleep. I couldn't, you know, get, like, a night's good night's rest because I was up and going to the bathroom constantly. And so she's just, like. She left the room and then, like, went up to a nurse's station and she was. She was demanding. She was demanding, you get the doctor here now and test for his seat. If I'm done playing this game of all. Like, we don't think she has it. Like, test her for it now. Yeah, like. And so they. They tested me. And what did it come up? I had cdf and I was able to get the. The medication for that. And that's when I started to feel better after. Sorry. That, like, feel like the. The medications start working and, you know, kicking in. And I. My mom is my saving grace. She's like. She was my son of voice. Yeah. In the hospital. Because obviously you didn't have one. Yeah, I didn't have one. She, like, was with me every step of the way. Like, that woman never left my side. She. When everyone told her, like, we can stay with Courtney, you need to go shower. She would. She would fight. Be like, no, I don't need to. I don't need to, like, do this. I can sleep here. I can, like, it's fine. I don't need. She. We can't. We became super close, and during that time, because we were with each other, like, constantly. And I, I'm. I'm very. I'm, like, so blessed for that time that I. I got with her during that time, because, yeah, we. We became so close. And I, I, I, like, I know that was, like, a not so great thing that happened on, but a good, like, a great thing happened, like, came out of it, you know, getting that relationship with my mom. And I just remember just, like, being after the stroke, being so, like, all, like, the bad and of my life being stripped away from me because in the hospital, my mom said that, like, I was, like, childlike again, being like, like, saying hi to everybody that we, like, like, wheeled past, like, because I would be in a wheelchair. Because whenever I would. I'd go anywhere, would be you in a wheelchair. Her. They'd. I would say hi to everybody. And, like, I would. I was so happy in the hospital, like, even know, like, this. These things were happening to me. I was so happy. And, you know, and she said that she felt like she was. She was talking with Jesus, you know, like. Like a. Like, I. Like I was so close to him at that time that I. My. Like, everything was just shining through and this horrible heat thing happened to me. Yeah, for sure. But I. I wasn't focused on that. And I was able to look at the positives. I was able to, you know, like, that's what I focused on. And I was, like, so blessed to be able to, like, be that way, you know, like, during that. Like, because some people, like, you know, when things get hard or something, they just shut down. They. They just, like, they're just saying, like, it's too much. Like, I. I can't. Like, they. But I was able to, you know, shine through the bad. And. Yeah, my mom talks about that with me all the time, and she just was like, I just. You were just so happy, and through this, through that hard time, and I'm. I like it. I look. Looked up to you. I still look up to you, because you went through this hard thing and so many hard things, and you were. Weren't mad. You were. I was sad, but, you know, with all the things that happened to me. But I wasn't angry yet, you know. God, for having this happen to me, you know, And I was also grateful that I was able to bring peace to, like, my family and, you know.

Host (87:34)

Yeah.

Courtney (87:36)

Because they're. They're all just, you know, worried about me and all these things. But I was able to bring some peace knowing that, like, I wasn't, you know, struggling mentally. I was able to feel, like. Feel the good in a mostly bad time, you know? Yeah. I don't know. Like, explain that, though.

Host (88:00)

I think, too, you know, sometimes we realize the reality of life when the worst things happen. And it's sad sometimes that it takes something traumatic or scary to happen, but I feel like sometimes it's in those times that we really start to notice the small things, the things around us, what's important, what matters, what doesn't. And I think that that really can bring people together.

Courtney (88:26)

Yeah.

Host (88:27)

You know, and I think that, like you said before, it's. It was a horrible thing that happened and terrifying, but at least your life is saved. Yeah, it could have been. You could have been healthy your whole life, and then all of a sudden, you know, with the holes in your.

Courtney (88:41)

Heart, you could have had kids so you got like, it could have been married. Like I. And then they just lost their mom, you know, like it would have been like worse. Yeah. Worse. Yeah. So I, I, you know, and then.

Host (88:58)

Now are you, do you feel like you have fully recovered or are you still in any type of rehab or anything or. No.

Courtney (89:06)

At this point the. They. My insurance stopped after two years paying for on my rehab. So I just, if I want to do like some rehab, I'll just like go the gym.

Host (89:20)

Okay.

Courtney (89:20)

So like, you know, here and there, like try to work on some things, you know, walking, lifting weights, stuff like that. But yeah, after two years you're like, yeah, she doesn't need it anymore. Like, my answers was like, yeah, she's fine.

Host (89:35)

Do you feel like you've fully recovered from it or not yet?

Courtney (89:38)

I, I feel like I'm 90 better. I feel like there's like 10 where I can be like a hundred percent, but I would say I'm mostly better. So like, like. Right.

Host (89:55)

And it's amazing, you know, like.

Courtney (89:57)

Yeah.

Host (89:57)

Because you would never know from the no looking in, which is. I always think that's so crazy and interesting and something that people need to remember that just like you're a case where you would never know.

Courtney (90:08)

Yeah.

Host (90:09)

Or what has happened.

Courtney (90:10)

Exactly. I, you never know and you don't know like what other people are going through or happen through you.

Host (90:17)

Yeah.

Courtney (90:17)

And my stroke from where I was at the beginning, like I had like a major stroke. Where to be where I am right now is a blessing in itself.

Host (90:28)

Yeah. Right.

Courtney (90:29)

And like how long did it take.

Host (90:33)

For the drooping to go away?

Courtney (90:35)

Oh my gosh. That took like six months.

Host (90:38)

Really?

Courtney (90:39)

Yeah.

Host (90:39)

Were they. Did they know if it was going to go away or not?

Courtney (90:42)

The. They were like, yeah, like she has to do like when she does speech. Like my speech rehabby would be like you working these muscles on like the right side of my face, you know, try to like get them to, you know, start working and doing those muscles. Like working those muscles like, helped me to build it. Yeah. Build it more. I still like, I still feel sometimes I do still have like a droop. I, I. Because like it's my face and I'm like, yeah, there's. There's something like not right about like, you know, me talking. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Just that makes you feel. No. Yeah, makes me. Yeah.

Host (91:18)

No, like I feel like never know.

Courtney (91:20)

Yeah.

Host (91:20)

And then the right side of your body, like your, your right arm and leg. Do, do you feel like that's pretty much all better or do you feel like there's still like some weakness on that side.

Courtney (91:29)

I feel like there's some weakness still on that side. But the. The only thing that really bugs me about the set is my nerve pain. I developed, okay. Very severe nerve pain from the stroke. And the nerve pain is constant.

Host (91:46)

Okay.

Courtney (91:47)

And never goes away. And even taking medication for it, it doesn't take it away. So I feel this pain all the time.

Host (91:56)

Sorry.

Courtney (91:56)

No, you can.

Host (91:57)

So. And there's nothing that they can do about that because the medicine doesn't work.

Courtney (92:00)

No. They're just like the. It's like again with the brain. Like.

Host (92:06)

I know.

Courtney (92:06)

They don't know.

Host (92:07)

Complicated.

Courtney (92:07)

Yeah. They're like, you could either go away or it doesn't. We don't know.

Host (92:11)

That's crazy.

Courtney (92:12)

And it's been six years.

Host (92:13)

Yeah.

Courtney (92:14)

Of me having this. And I'm like, well, I don't know if, like, maybe it's going to go away or not.

Host (92:19)

Yeah.

Courtney (92:20)

And so I'm like praying to heaven almighty that it will go away. But, you know, if it doesn't, I.

Host (92:27)

Do think it, like, I feel like it is. At least for me. It would be so reassuring to know the cause.

Courtney (92:33)

Yeah.

Host (92:34)

Because I feel like, you know, if you just have something like that happen, you don't know why. I feel like you're living in this fear every day of like, could it happen again?

Courtney (92:41)

Yeah.

Host (92:41)

But I feel like the fact that they were able to find that cause of it.

Courtney (92:45)

Yeah. And like fix the holes in my house.

Host (92:47)

Yeah. Like, I feel like it kills two birds with one stone. You figured something out that could have affected your future and then it, you know, it's. It's scary, but. And I think it's interesting when you were talking about how you kept thinking you were fine, I feel like that was your body probably trying to protect itself with your mind because if not, you go into shock and panic.

Courtney (93:07)

Yes. Cuz like right when you can't move. Yeah. You're like, right. Because like when I, like right when I moved my right, right leg for the first time, that's when everything clicked and that's when I started to like. Yeah, it's going to panic.

Host (93:22)

Like when you lose control of your function, of your body and you know, we take it for granted, like so many small things, you know, And I mean, people realize that even when they get sick with like a cold or something and you're like, oh, I just.

Courtney (93:35)

Want to get better.

Host (93:37)

But you know, when you lose function and you can't do simple things anymore that, you know, seemed like just Part of your everyday routine. It puts things into perspective.

Courtney (93:47)

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Host (94:18)

This is your fix. I am your host, Stassi Schroeder.

Courtney (94:23)

Welcome to Tell Me Lies, the official podcast.

Host (94:26)

What's the most unhinged thing of season three?

Courtney (94:29)

Steven. Because he's so evil.

Advertiser/Announcer (94:31)

I do think he is misunderstood.

Courtney (94:33)

You see every. Everyone face consequences. It's intoxicating.

Advertiser/Announcer (94:36)

The writers just know how to trick.

Courtney (94:38)

Yeah.

Advertiser/Announcer (94:39)

There's always a twist in this show. Tell Me Lies, the official podcast, January 6th. And stream the new season of Tell.

Host (94:44)

Me Lies January 13th on Hulu and Hulu on Disney plus, for sure.

Courtney (94:49)

Because, like, I was 18 and, like, ready to start my life and, like, ready to be an adult, and. Because I was barely an adult and. But to be transformed back into a kid again, relearning how to do things, it's just.

Host (95:03)

It's interesting.

Courtney (95:04)

Frustrating.

Host (95:05)

It, like, physically sets you back, but I think mentally pushes you forward because you're going through something that people your age don't typically go through.

Courtney (95:15)

I had to grow up fast.

Host (95:16)

Yeah.

Courtney (95:17)

And grow up super quick because, like.

Host (95:21)

It'S mentally challenging, to say the least. It's like, you were right. I mean, so many people could probably relate to just wanting to give up and be like, just kill me, seriously, because this is hell.

Courtney (95:33)

Yeah.

Host (95:34)

That's horrible.

Courtney (95:36)

It, like, one. I was just keep. Like, when I caught, like, getting sick and sick and, like, in the hospital, I was like, all right. Right.

Host (95:44)

What's next?

Courtney (95:44)

Yeah, Like, I'm like, you just. If you're just gonna. If you're gonna take me, just take me. Right? Like, just.

Host (95:50)

And everything was so different. Like, one thing after another after, like, it's that. It's terrible.

Courtney (95:55)

Yeah. And I. I was just like. At that point, I was just like, I. I don't. Yeah, I'm done. I. I can't handle another thing that's gonna happen to me.

Host (96:03)

I'm like, did you end up going to college after?

Courtney (96:05)

I. I am in college right now. Graduate. I graduate in two years. Okay, two years. So I just barely started because, you know, doing rehab for two years and, like, you know, yeah. It takes time and you know, you have so much time ahead of you. Yeah. And like what you want to do. I am going to school for nursing. Okay. Amazing. I. That the reason why I am going to school for nursing is because when I was in the hospital for my stroke, the, in the neuro icu, I had this one nurse. You know, there's like nurses out there that are like, you know, not softies. They're just start. Yeah, no, like they're just not softies. They're just like, you know, they're just there to like work and you know, do their job and you know, not like, yeah, like after the, the work day is done, like go home. You know, like she's, she was very like not like hard hearted but like, you know, like very cold. Not cold but like it's like when.

Host (97:25)

Like just like to the point.

Courtney (97:26)

Yeah, yeah, to the point. And when I, she, she like I want to. Was her patient one time. I, I like I just, I just softened her. I remember just softening, softening her and to the point where she would stay after her work days, like 12 hour days, you know, to come and talk to me and my family, you know, see how it was doing. Like, see how like I was progressing. Like any, like she would come and talk to us for hours and hours or like I wish I. She was helping me shower one time and I got dressed back dressed and she would like help me dress. And then I remember her brushing my hair and you know, after the shower and she was putting the leave in the conditioner in my hair and brushing my hair. And I remember like looking up her and being like I love you. Oh, I love you. And she's just like I love you too. Like I like I love you. I just remember her like softening her like her heart and she brought her makeup from home, you know, and her makeup brushes, her makeup palettes and came and did my makeup one time because you know, I wasn't able to like, you know, get dressed up there. I was just, I was in a, in a gown and like I like have videos of her, you know, just doing my makeup and me saying, trying to say palettes. And she's just like what? And I'm like palette, palette. And because it was her makeup palettes and she was like, oh yeah, like palette. Like even though we couldn't really talk on like, like I couldn't talk to her, I. We still like connected in like an emotional way, like a mental way. And I, she showed me that what I want to do is be a nurse. Like, because after high school, I really, again, I didn't know what I wanted to do.

Host (99:28)

Yeah.

Courtney (99:29)

And she showed me. Oh. Like, this is, like, my path. This is what I want to do. Because in high school, I didn't take any, like, anatomy classes. I didn't like there. I had no idea that I wanted to go this route right until then. And I'm so. I'm so thankful for her. I'm still in contact with her to this day because I'm sure, like, you know, checking in. Because, you know, checking in with her, like, I just. We, like, I have visitor, like, every time that I go up to St. George, like, I would go visit her.

Host (100:05)

Yeah.

Courtney (100:05)

And I. I just. I'm like. And the. When I was staying in that neuro rehab down in Murray, that the nurse in the ER that was, you know, was. Was maternal over me, came and brought her son and, you know, came and visited me, and she came down here and, you know, came and visited me and took the time out of her day to, you know, come see me and come say hi.

Host (100:35)

That's so sweet.

Courtney (100:35)

And I was also grateful for. For both of them.

Host (100:39)

Absolutely.

Courtney (100:40)

Both of them. And they both showed me what I wanted to do is. Was health care.

Host (100:45)

Well, I think, too, like, in those times when you are struggling and you're in need, of course, it's great to have your family there as support, but I think having medical professionals that also make you feel like you're important.

Courtney (100:59)

Yeah.

Host (101:00)

And like, you're at home, that can be really comforting and make you feel very safe. And it is important to have that.

Courtney (101:06)

Yes.

Host (101:06)

Scary.

Courtney (101:07)

It is scary.

Host (101:07)

When you're in something like that, you're terrified, you're frustrated, you're confused. So to have somebody that knows what they're doing kind of support you through that and. And also be there to.

Courtney (101:18)

Yeah.

Host (101:19)

Soften the situation. It is helpful.

Courtney (101:21)

Yeah, it's very. It made a. I don't know, like, what would have happened if, like, I didn't have that? Because it was. It. It changed. They changed my life. And I'm like, I want to do the same for them because I know that they did. They changed my life, like, completely. And you do that for others. Yeah, I want to do that for somebody else.

Host (101:46)

Yes.

Courtney (101:46)

And use my story to, you know, tell everybody that, you know, you. You can get to, you know, where I am. Like, you know, if, like, I had to. Like, I worked in a spinal cord rehab as a CNA after my stroke, because I got my CNA right After, like, you know, when they showed me what I wanted to do, and I was like, this is what I want to do. So I got my CNA certified certification and I started working as a cna and I worked in the spinal cord rehab department. And I remember just having, like, people there just, you know, doing therapy because, you know, they lost function in their legs or their, you know, their arm. Like, everything like, you, like, it's either, you know, one or the other. And I remember having this one patient, you know, talking to me that they, like, were skiing and they had an accident and broke their neck. And now they're here and he doesn't know, like, he didn't know how to, like, you know, take it and like, he like, doesn't. Because everything was, he was fine one second and the next he wasn't. And I, I was able to be like, I use my story to my advantage, but I was able to say, I know this. I'm not, I, I, I, I didn't have, like, the same thing happen to you, but I once was, you know, normal, happy, and nothing wrong with me. And then one second everything was taken for me and I was able to be like, I had a stroke and I had to relearn how to do everything. Like, I was in rehab for, I was in the hospital for over a month learning, relearning how to do everything.

Host (103:37)

And I think that is so important and incredible when people can relate to somebody and be like, I truly do get it. Yeah, I had to relearn too. And I think that that makes it even more special that you are, you know, wanting to help people and helping people that are going through similar things like that because you, you genuinely get it. You're not, you know, and it's okay. Some people do treat their job just like, in and out, you know, they're there for that. But I do think that, you know, people like you are even more important in the sense when you can just like, give that, that relatability. That's what people need most. I mean, we are meant for human connection.

Courtney (104:15)

Yes.

Host (104:16)

People need that connection and they need that helps them get through things.

Courtney (104:20)

No, I, I agree with you a hundred percent. Then when I first left the hospital, the, the rehab center, I went over, over to the re, like the hospital to say hi to everybody. Like, all my therapists, my nurses and, you know, doctors there just like, say hi. And there's this one therapist that was like, we have a patient here who's from France. She's was over here, you know, going to school and. And she had a stroke and she's in. In this room. And I. I feel like she would benefit from you talking to her about your story and how, you know, how you're progressing. Yeah. So I was able to, you know, go chat with her. I. Even though, like, we didn't speak the same language because obviously she's from France, but I was able to connect with her emotionally and be like you and then the. Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, tell her and like, tell her it's gonna. It's gonna be okay. It's a long road, but it's gonna be okay.

Host (105:33)

Yeah.

Courtney (105:34)

And, like, I, like, if you need anything, I'm here. And like, after she got out of the hospital, she, like, I like, her. My mom would talk to her mom because her mom, like, flew down from France. So, you know, be with her in the hospital, and then when they went home, they. She would send me stuff. I would send her stuff. So we would email back and forth and I'd get pictures of her, like, doing stuff. Like, she loves, like, horseback riding, you know, and I. I loved it. I. I loved, you know, it makes a difference. It makes a difference for sure. And I was. I was glad to, you know, bring some peace to her and her mom, you know, because again, she, like, has had a stroke and she was young, she was in college and in a different country. Her mom wasn't there. Her mom was back in France. Right. And I was able to bring her some. Some comfort. And I was. I'm very, very blessed to be able to be that person for. For her as well. Because even though you wouldn't think, like, oh, she wasn't doing anything for me because I was the one talking to her, she. But she changed me as well, of course.

Host (106:51)

And it also helps you not feel like your situation was like, that you're alone, even though through it. It doesn't mean that you don't think about it or still have it there that, like, you. It's part of your story and journey as well.

Courtney (107:03)

Yeah.

Host (107:03)

That's going to help you just as much.

Courtney (107:05)

Yeah, no, definitely. And I'm so thankful for all of the. The people that I've, you know, met because of this. And I am just like. So like, even, like opportunities or like, you know, experiences that I've happened in my life, and I'm. I'm also grateful for that as well. And when my mom was told that, you know, you should probably like, you know, record her doing stuff or, like, talking, you should, like, you know, so she can See her progress as she. She goes along. So if she gets frustrated, one day you can be like, remember how you were the first day or the second day or the third. You're not like that now. You're so much better than where you were now. And that would make her, like, make her feel so much better. Yeah, she would. Yeah, like, record me doing stuff. And then she decided one day that she wanted to post one on. On Twitter, and she just wanted, like, you know, like, at least she just wanted prayers for me. You know, she just wanted to put something out there to people because she had, like, five followers. She was just. She. It was not like a po. Like, she didn't post on there. She was just there to, like, stalk her children. And she just posted since, like, saying, like, this is my daughter. She had the. The stroke. Like, if anyone out there who's following me, just, like, please pray for her. And, like. Like, a couple days go by, and one of her friend, like, her friends who she saw a couple days later, like, have you been on Twitter? Like, have you. Have you looked at your Twitter? And she's just like, no, she's like, your post about Courtney went, like, Is going viral. Like, it's so. Like, so many people are, like, retweeting it, like, favoriting it, and, like, reaching out to her, and, like, you should go see it. And so she went to go see it, and she had, like, so many people try to, like, reach out to her. She had, like, a basketball player on the Cavaliers, like, want. Wanting to, like. Like, you know, see how I was doing, and then wanting to send me stuff, and he sent me stuff, and a football player from the Denver Broncos wanting to send me stuff, and, like, so many, like, all, like, I. Let's get. She was getting messages from all over the world saying, like, I'm praying for you, praying for your daughter. And she was like, I would, like, the. Like, this is insane. Insane. Like, how many. Like, how people. How people are reaching out. Yeah. Like. Like, come together and, you know, praying for this girl that people. They. They don't even know, but they, like. Like, they're, you know, DMing her their stories and, like, saying, like, oh, like, I'm. I'm praying for your daughter. And, like, God, this is what I went through. And, like. Like, she was just so grateful for all that she had. It was seriously, like, all over people, all over not messaging her. And I was also, like, very, like, grateful for all those people who reached out to me and my mom and, yeah, you know, I couldn't thank them enough. And then that's when I started to, you know, get into, to tick tock and I was like, oh, like maybe I could like, you know, start posting my story on there. And that's when I started, you know, getting a following from my story because, you know.

Host (110:53)

Yeah.

Courtney (110:53)

It's not like a normal thing.

Host (110:54)

Right. And people love to connect and hear.

Courtney (110:58)

Yes.

Host (110:58)

What people have gone through.

Courtney (111:00)

Yeah, exactly.

Host (111:02)

And never stop sharing it. I always tell my guests, like, if you're open to sharing your story, never stop sharing. No, because it always helps so many people.

Courtney (111:11)

So many people. Like I've had so many people like reach out to me, talking to me about their, like their stories and like it makes me feel close to them, you know, and I love like hearing, you know, their experiences and on their stories and that I, that's probably one of my favorite things about having this, you know, people following is people reaching out to me and saying like saying like their story. And I love it. I, I love it. I, I, that's yeah, my favorite thing about it. And, and it turned it to this thing of like, you know, you know, posting and like about my story or like my days of like, you know, as a stroke survivor, you know, and the, you know, like about my heart surgery. Like, like all these things, like I, it's just some place where I can just like, you know, vent if I wanted to and then.

Host (112:09)

But also help people and help yourself.

Courtney (112:11)

Yeah, exactly. It's the best of both worlds.

Host (112:13)

It's perfect.

Courtney (112:14)

Yeah, it's perfect. Yes. And like obviously, like there's hate, but obviously it's fine. It's everywhere.

Host (112:23)

It's the part, it's the downside of social media.

Courtney (112:25)

Yeah.

Host (112:26)

Those people, you know, I always say this. Somebody that can have first of all negativity and anger, that's its own demon. But yeah, somebody that can hate on somebody that, I mean hating on someone in general is so stupid. You have to be a miserable person.

Courtney (112:41)

They really. Yeah.

Host (112:42)

Doing that for somebody that is just trying to share their story or, you know, show their life or whatever it might be, you know, if you don't like it, don't watch it.

Courtney (112:50)

Yeah.

Host (112:51)

But if something is triggering something in you to have a negative, mean reaction, that's only a reflection of you.

Courtney (112:57)

Yeah, no, like it's like that. I totally agree. I had this one time because I had to relearn how to drive obviously because how to get my driver's license again because I lost that function until. Because you know, I never really learned how to do Everything. So I relearned how I. I got my license again when they said, oh, like you're. You're like, you're pretty much better. So I think you can get like, get. Have your license back. And so I got it and then my neurologist gave me like a, like a handicap parking because it like walking for me, like places. If I walk for too long, like I get super tired and like it's just like at Disneyland, if like we're walking around, I. I get like tired. Like way more tired than anyone else.

Host (113:55)

Still went through something.

Courtney (113:56)

Yeah.

Host (113:57)

So traumatic that it's like, even if you are better, it's normal.

Courtney (114:01)

Yeah.

Host (114:02)

Like unexpected. That you might have to take things slower and easier.

Courtney (114:06)

Yeah. I'm like, I just.

Host (114:08)

So what people had something to say about you having a handicap?

Courtney (114:11)

Yeah.

Host (114:12)

Yeah. Tag.

Courtney (114:12)

Yeah. I. I had a handicap and I parked in the handicap and spot and I was like, I think it was going to like, you know, a store like Target or something like that. And I remember somebody saying, are you sure you're able to park there? And you look fine to me. And I was just like, but once.

Host (114:34)

Again, that's a prime example of somebody looking at you from the outside and judging. That's why we should never judge other people. Who cares?

Courtney (114:41)

Yeah.

Host (114:41)

You know what I mean?

Courtney (114:43)

I'm like, I don't need to explain something to you because I don't even know you.

Host (114:47)

Is parking there and they are fine. That's their karma.

Courtney (114:51)

Yeah.

Host (114:51)

Not yours. Don't worry about it.

Courtney (114:53)

You know what I mean?

Host (114:54)

Like, people are just outrageous with those kind of things, but never let that deter you.

Courtney (115:01)

No.

Host (115:01)

Obviously what you haven't. But always keep sharing and letting people know. You know, the ins and outs. Obviously within your comfort level. But that just helps so many people. It's so important. I think that it's amazing that we have platforms that people can share their stories and. And connect with people through an online platform where it doesn't have to be face to face.

Courtney (115:24)

Yeah.

Host (115:25)

It makes the biggest difference. It makes people feel like they aren't struggling by themselves. You know, there's nothing like relating to somebody who's gone through something, especially if it's somebody that's younger and like it. Because especially if something like that happens, you could feel like, well, this only happens to older people or like, yeah, you would think. But being able to find other survivors that that's happened to it. It really. It makes you feel better.

Courtney (115:50)

Yeah.

Host (115:50)

In your situation.

Courtney (115:52)

Because like before the stroke, I had. I heard nobody. Nobody. My Age have having a stroke ever. And then after, then I started to hear, like, so many other people, like, yeah, like, open, like, opened up like a major door to me. Me feeling I'm not the only one out there. I'm.

Host (116:13)

I.

Courtney (116:13)

Because at the beginning I was like, I know, like, this happens, like, right. Nobody. Yeah. Like, this should, like, what. This happens to nobody. And then like, after time goes on, like, after, like, time went on, I'm like, oh, there's so many other people out there that I didn't know about that have had the same thing happen to them. And that made me feel, made me feel peace. Yeah. And like, I not like, not saying, like, I'm so grateful that you had that happen to you. And, like, we're able to share that, but, like, I'm just grateful for you to, like, be, to be able to share that with me.

Host (116:52)

Yes.

Courtney (116:52)

And I, I'm very glad to, like, you know, make you feel comfortable enough to, you know, open up to me too, because just, it's just not something that you want to, like, share louder than the world most times. But, like, for me, I'm like, I, I do because I'm like, I, I, Yeah, it's my story. And I, I, I want people to know that I, I didn't just get here just because I, I got here from work hard and determined, like, hard work and determination. And I, I just know that not having, like, the competitive nature that I did have, like, you know, playing sports and all that, and it didn't, I wouldn't feel like I didn't, Wouldn't have that drive that I did.

Host (117:46)

Yeah. Have that makes sense.

Courtney (117:48)

And to, you know, fight. Yeah, fight. And to get better to where I, I was. And I was grateful for me to, you know, like, also have that as well, you know, to, you know, have that fight in me and wanting to get better.

Host (118:03)

Yeah, absolutely. Well, you did amazing.

Courtney (118:05)

Thank you.

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