
Loading summary
Jacqueline Ackerman
Foreign.
Mallory Erickson
This episode is brought to you by Idonate. Their Donor First Giving suite, including mobile pop ups, a B, testing recurring prompts.
Makes it easy to convert more donors.
Faster, easy to set up and publish with no tech team required. Launch custom giving forms that sync seamlessly with your CRM.
Smarter data, better donor journeys.
Check them out@idonate.com.
Jacqueline Ackerman
I do want to go back to your point about the scarcity mindset. We talk about this a lot at the Women's Philanthropy Institute, but we know that when women are giving they are also very relationship centered and they are very cognizant of trust and transparency. And so I would say that your approach of saying, hey donor, we are a great organization. This is also a great organization that might be aligned with your desires, your desired change that you want to see in the world that actually engenders trust in you as a fundraiser in your organization.
Mallory Erickson
Hey, my name is Mallory and I'm obsessed with helping leaders in the nonprofit space raise money and run their organizations differently. What the Fundraising is a space for real and raw conversations to both challenge and inspire you. Not too long ago I was in your shoes, uncomfortable with fundraising and unsure of my place in this sector. It wasn't until I started to listen to other experts outside of the fundraising space that I was able to shift my mindset and ultimately shift the way.
I show up as a leader.
This podcast is my way of blending professional and personal development so we as a collective inside the nonprofit sector can feel good about the work we are doing. Join me every week as I interview some of the brightest minds in the personal and professional development space to help you fundamentally change the way you lead and fundraise. I hope you enjoy this episode, so let's dive in. Welcome everyone.
I am so excited to be here today with Jacqueline Ackerman. Jacqueline, welcome to what the fundraising.
Jacqueline Ackerman
Thank you so much. I'm really excited to be here.
Mallory Erickson
Me too. Why don't we start with you just giving a little introduction to you and your work and then we'll dive in into the focus of our conversation today.
Jacqueline Ackerman
Awesome. Thanks so much. Well, I am Jacqueline Jackie Ackerman. I am with the Women's Philanthropy Institute. We are a small research institute that is located at the Indiana University Lilly Family School of Philanthropy and we focus on all things gender and philanthropy. So looking especially at women donors, which I'll talk about today with you, but we also research giving to women's and girls causes as well as women in the fundraising and nonprofit leadership stage. So really excited to be here and share Some of our insights on how to better engage women donors with. With your listeners.
Mallory Erickson
Amazing. And I'm particularly excited to talk about this because I feel like one of the things that I address a lot in my work are the limiting beliefs and assumptions and interpretations that we make as fundraisers that hold us back from being able to raise money from the right folks. And a lot of those assumptions and interpretations and limiting beliefs come from bias that we might have around who philanthropists are, what they care about, et cetera. So can you talk about all of that from your perspective?
Jacqueline Ackerman
Absolutely. I would say so much of what we do at the Women's Philanthropy Institute is myth busting. And we hear myths all the time about, well, women aren't generous. They don't give these big gifts, and they're not making the money when they're in households with men, so they're not controlling where the money is given. And these are all just absolutely mistaken beliefs. And they are kind of predicated on the idea that, you know, we know that kind of for so long, the standard philanthropist has been a wealthy white male. And so philanthropy and fundraising kind of grew around these major philanthropists. And so it's kind of still in that phase today, even though who a philanthropist is looks very different. And so we know our research of more than a decade shows that women are more generous in a number of ways compared to men. They're more likely to give. They're giving higher amounts compared to similarly wealthy men. And they are often spreading their wealth and their philanthropy around to multiple organizations and causes, which is one of the reasons why they don't get quite as much recognition compared to similar men.
Mallory Erickson
Okay, wait, talk to me a little bit about that, because I'm thinking about in my book, I talk about the. Some of the scarcity mindset beliefs that lead to these transactional ways that we have been taught to fundraise. And some of those are rooted in this idea of kind of competition or our donors being fearful. I share a story in the book about getting in trouble one time for bringing up another organization on a call with a donor because my boss was sure then that we weren't going to get the gift because we let them know about some other organization doing complimentary work. And so talk to me a little bit about that myth in particular and why it matters so much that we talk about.
Jacqueline Ackerman
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And there's so much about how and why women give that is different broadly from men. And so, for example, one of the things we learn as fundraisers is what can we offer a donor, right? If it's a really big gift, can we name a program, a building, et cetera, after them? And we know that women donors don't love that. They don't even love to be offered it. It's kind of like, how dare you think that I would be motivated by this? I'm motivated by the cause. We know that some major, major donors, like Melinda French Gates and other prominent examples have actually turned down naming opportunities. It's just not something that res with women donors. And what women donors are more focused on is the story. It's the end result, the cause. We hear a lot about ROI in philanthropy, and if I give a dollar, how much is going to the cause or how many people will be helped? And women want that, but they want that plus knowing the impact on an individual person, a program, you know, a student, for example. And so a lot of the transactional ways that we tend to approach donors are really, again, those kind of old fashioned, like they're speaking to men. It's, it's, you know, the old fashioned, like men speaking to men about money, and it is not resonating with women donors. And I will add other donors, LGBTQ donors, donors of color. We find a lot of the same principles for other donors who essentially have in common that they are not wealthy white men. And so, yeah, one of the myths that we bust is, first of all, that women aren't generous. But also, if you think that women aren't generous, you're probably approaching them in ways that don't resonate with them. You are probably bringing them rewards for donating instead of telling them stories and about who will be helped. You are perhaps, if they are in a relationship with a man, approaching the man first or assuming that whoever is the breadwinner is also making charitable giving decisions, which is absolutely not true. We know that women are essentially the CFOs in 90% of coupled households and that they are more likely than men to be making charitable giving decisions for their households. Mm.
Mallory Erickson
Okay. So there's so much in here to unpack. So I love hearing that about how women resonate with stories. And when you were first talking about it, I was like, this is making me feel like maybe women are looking for less transactional fundraising experience. Like everything you were saying, I was like, okay, this is really breaking outside of how we've thought about. And I'm thinking about it for board members too, right? We talk about, like, give, get, and we've talked about all these things in this super transactional way, which Hearing you talk, I'm like, yeah, no wonder like people aren't feeling, you know, women are, and basically non white men are not feeling kind of met in the moment when we keep defaulting to these practices that really only like felt aligned with one type of donor.
Jacqueline Ackerman
Yes, absolutely. Well, and I do want to go back to your point about the scarcity mindset. We talk about this a lot at the Women's Philanthropy Institute, but we know that when women are giving, they are also very relationship style centered and they are very cognizant of trust and transparency. And so I would say that your approach of saying, hey donor, we are a great organization. This is also a great organization that might be aligned with your desires, your desired change that you want to see in the world that actually engenders trust in you as a fundraiser in your organization. And we know that women may take a little bit longer to get to. Yes, they may want to learn more, they may want to see, see more background, see, hear more stories. But once they donate, they're incredibly loyal donors. And so even if you're giving them other opportunities or other insights into, you know, the causes that they care about, that doesn't mean that they're just going to up and leave. They might add onto their philanthropy, but they'll rarely just say, oh, thanks for the tip, goodbye. They're very relational, very relationship oriented and values driven. And that goes beyond like I, not a fundraising letter, so I'm writing a check and then I'm never going to hear from or about them again other than in the mail like that. It, that's not the paradigm that we're, we're talking about when it comes to women's philanthropy. It is so relationship transparency, collaboration based. And these are some things that yes, we see occasionally in men's philanthropy, but not overall.
Mallory Erickson
Okay, so I'm wondering about like, I don't know the right way of saying this, but I'm thinking about some of our practices or like some of what happens when we don't have ways of following up with folks who have given a one time gift. Right. So I'm thinking about like our kind of recurring giving crisis in this sector and how many people give to us that you know, don't hear back at least until the next solicitation and hearing everything that you're saying right now. I could imagine, but maybe this is my own like limiting belief or projection, but I could imagine that like women might have additional feelings or be more like kind of harmed by some of those practices then because the benefit that they're getting really is in that storytelling, is in that impact reporting. So I'm just curious, like, as you recommend recommendations that you're making for fundraisers in terms of their practices, like, how much more important is it even to make sure that you have this kind of these ongoing touch points that is so important.
Jacqueline Ackerman
I'm really glad that you brought that up because when we prioritize relationships with our donors and not just transactional asks, we are committing essentially to this deeper, more sustained engagement. And so we often talk about the tease of philanthropy. I'm sure most of your listeners have heard Time, Talent, Treasure at the Women's Philanthropy Institute, we changed it to seven T's. We kind of over committed to the T bit a bit, but it's a time talent, treasure, ties, testimony, transparency and trust. And so we find that women tend to be generous in all of these ways. So yes, they're giving money, but they're also volunteering. They also want to sit on your board, on your committees. They also want to tell their friends, their networks about your organization. And when they can't give, they want to prompt other people in their networks to give. They want to, you know, get to know you, but then trust you with, with their gift and not necessarily place a lot of asterisks on what that gift can be used for. And so I think when we think of, of women's philanthropy as money, plus, we all need money to run our organizations. I don't want to say like money is not important, but the way to retain women donors is to activate those other T's is to say, you know, we're having an event. We'd love for you to come join, meet your fellow donors. We are having a committee plan this event and we'd love to get you involved because we know that there's essentially a virtuous cycle. When you do one of those things, you want to do the other things. And so if you're giving money, you also want to get involved and give your time and give of your network. If you are volunteering, you are a prime candidate to become a donor. And so we just find that there's this virtuous cycle where one act of generosity leads to another. And so when fundraisers are focused so much on the revenue side, it really is to their long term detriment.
Mallory Erickson
Okay. There's so much in here that I feel like is important across, across so many different levels. And I feel like there's a myth we need to bust in what you're saying here, which is about that we're bothering donors, right? Like something I hear so often is, well, we just asked them for money. We don't want to ask them to come to this event or just ask them for money. We don't want to ask them to volunteer because we're feeling this uncomfortable power dynamic and we don't want to make too many asks. And what I hear you saying is like, those additional asks, invitations are what these donors are looking for. What makes it meaningful that they gave that financial gift and that we really need to get out. Because I feel like one of the reasons we have these lapse, like these big holes in communication, we only ask when there's a solicitation is because we don't want to bother people. And it's like actually what bothers them is only getting an email when you, when you're asking for money.
Jacqueline Ackerman
There we go. That's what I was gonna say is it's not so much about the repeated contacts as it is about what percentage is you asking for money. If it's a hundred percent, then sure, we get tired of that as donors and even women donors would get tired of that. But if it's an ask and then a thank you, and then here's an event you might want to attend or for donors giving this amount and above, we're having a special gathering. It's offering connection is almost never going to be unwelcome, especially by women donors, because that's what they're seeking. They're not seeking. They don't want to feel like just a wallet, like just a checkbook that you're constantly going back to. They want to feel like it's an actual relationship with give and take and that they have something of value. You, yes, their money, but something else. Whether it's their network, their time, encouraging their fellow friends, their colleagues, etc, to donate. They want to feel like you are reaching out to them for more than just that immediate check writing and that, you know, that they're bringing more to the table as donors. And I don't think that we are contacting donors too much. I think that we are not moderating the amount of the contact. That is a solicitation and only a solicitation. Like, we want to hear impact stories. We want to be invited to things. We want to know what you're doing. Not so that we can say, oh, I didn't give my money for that, but so that we can celebrate it and we can add to how we're supporting it. So, yeah, I think that overall, women Donors are all about connection and collaboration. And so it's less that contact is unwelcome and more like, what are you doing with that contact? If you have X number of emails or letters going out a year to the average donor, how are you using those? Because even we know the research says even a thank you note is essentially a solicitation in the effect that it has. Because people want to be thanked, they don't want to be solicited 100% of the time. And using your outreach in various ways can really only help you long term.
Mallory Erickson
Gosh, my head was, like, bobbing off. I was, like, in such agreement with everything that you were saying there. And I'm curious, like, how you think about or talk to fundraisers about, like, the lurking donors. So here's what I mean by that. That sounds really bad, and I don't actually mean it in a bad way. Like, I feel like sometimes, you know, fundraisers evaluate their engagement or interest from donors just based on engagement, right? Did they click a link in the email? Did they engage with a social media post? But we know that tons of people, and I'm speaking for myself here, too, are like, I think they call us like, lurkers, right? Like LinkedIn lurkers. Like, I'm so bad at engaging on posts, even my own, I'll write a post and I will, like, forget to reply to all the people who comment under it. Like, it's just like, I don't know why. My brain, it's just not wired for it. And so everything that you're saying, I like, I can hear nonprofits say. Like, I've, I've run into this with surveys, right? They're like, so few people responded to the survey. I'm like, yeah, but even the way they felt about being asked matters. Like, it's not just about that conversion on the survey from started to finish. It's like all these people had this feeling that you care about what they think and how they feel and what matters to them. And that has such a positive experience, even if they didn't fill it out. So, so how do you sort of recommend that nonprofits, like, maybe navigate that if they're starting to think about increasing the volume of their communication, but they're worried that every time they do, they, it falls on deaf ears? How do you sort of keep folks encouraged that those, that storytelling matters, those touch points matter, even if they can't see it reflected in the numbers initially?
Jacqueline Ackerman
Yeah, I think you're absolutely on the right track. And that's me as well. You know, I'll get tons of emails from organizations that I've given to once or I do give to regularly. But I'm like, yes, I trust that you're doing the thing. That's great. Delete, like, we'll read it if I have time. I don't have time. So I think that that's a very common experience and that you have to do the work even if you're not seeing the results immediately. Because maintaining that communication, even if it feels one sided, is so important. And I would say, you know, it can be a challenge when you're not a big shop in terms of your development department. But many development departments would have the capacity to tailor their messages and kind of a B test some different messages. So let's say you have two letters and one is focused on ROI and numbers of people that you've served and just really heavily hits that. And then another one has a little bit of that, but more about a story or two stories that really resonate. Test that out, see what kind of engagement you receive from each one. My theory would be that women would be more likely to engage with the second one and that that would perhaps lead to more clicks. But that is again, just a theory. So I think when you have the capacity, you can certainly a B test. I get a lot of questions from folks who don't have the capac, who are a one person development department or even like a one or two person nonprofit and their every minute counts. They, we put out a lot of research. They don't have time to read a research report. And so I try to focus on like, what is the one small thing that you can do to increase your engagement with women donors? And that might be making sure that your database actually credits women donors a lot of the time, credits women donors and calls them by the name that they prefer, et cetera. There are so many easy ways to make women feel heard. I can't tell you how many friends of mine I have heard say, oh, someone sent me a letter to Mr. And Mrs. His first name, his last name, and just such a turn off. Even if you identify with the cause, you're like, I don't want to reward this behavior. Even if I correct it, sometimes they still get it wrong. And so even a database setup and understanding how if a couple, a man and a woman together are giving a gift, whose name is it under? Who gets soft or hard credit for that? How are you documenting it is really her that has the motivation and has had all of the interaction. So when we send thank yous, we need to make sure we acknowledge her, we need to make sure that her email address is the first one, et cetera. So there are just some easy tweaks there. There are easy tweaks in terms of prospect research because when a woman and a man are perhaps giving the same AM to charity, but the woman is spreading it out around more organizations, she might come up a little bit less in terms of who you are lifting up to a major gifts officer. And so if we can look at metrics like loyalty, is she giving monthly or annually instead of one big gift? What's kind of the cumulative value here? There are just other ways that we can say, okay, we want to tap you for a more in depth conversation and just making sure that you have kind of a gender equal major gifts roster to go through. And I know I'm going on because there are so many little, little tweaks that people can make to do better with women donors. And it's, you know, if you're a major gifts officer, look at your calendar for the next month and check out all of those appointments that you have to speak to donors. And where there's someone who has a spouse, a partner, family member, you don't have to with work, force them into it. Just say, hey, is there anyone else you want to have involved in this conversation? Because often the default is I'm going to go meet Mr. So and so at his office or we are doing golf. Like I'll just ask him there. And that's how you're cutting out the real philanthropic decision maker and the person who has the capacity to really make this relationship with your nonprofit long term. So yeah, there are so many tiny ways to just start whether you are, you know, a 20, 50 person development department or just one person.
Mallory Erickson
Okay, I love that.
And I know we're, we're almost out of time, but I just want to double click on that because I think we often think that recognition and appreciation has to be in these massive, grand, sweeping gestures. But what you're saying is like paying attention to the identity of the person in all those micro moments too and how far along that goes. I know you have some resources to share with folks. We're going to make sure those are all in the show notes, but tell folks anywhere else you want to make sure they go to connect with you, learn more, download. I love that we ended with a bunch of quick tips.
Jacqueline Ackerman
Yeah, absolutely. Well, highly recommend that folks visit our website. Honestly, since we're at a university, it's easier if you just just Google Women's Philanthropy Institute, Indiana University but one resource I do want to plug, it's called Proven Practices in Women's Philanthropy and I'll make sure that folks have the URL. But essentially what we tried to do is take all of our research and insights that we've gathered over decades and put it into a really practicable way for folks to better engage women as donors. And so it based on you take a very quick assessment that helps you understand where you're already doing well with women donors and what's kind of the easiest jumping off point for you to start. And so is it that you're on board with engaging women as donors, but your leadership doesn't really care if you spend time on it, doesn't really want to invest that time and energy. It tells you how to kind of pull your own data and get your leadership on board. If you're fully on board and leadership is on board but you don't know where to start, it helps you pull together perhaps a focus group of your major women donors or women in the community that you would want to engage. And it's not just like, hey, you should do a focus group. It's like, here's an invite template. Here's how you decide who to invite and what questions you should ask them. And so it is just we want people to be able to plug and play and take these steps to better engage women donors without having to reinvent the wheel for how to do these steps.
Mallory Erickson
I love that. Thank you so much. I'm going to be going and sharing.
Those resources in other places as well. Thanks for sharing all of this wisdom with us today.
Jacqueline Ackerman
Absolutely. I'm so happy to. And thank you so much for the invite.
Mallory Erickson
I hope today's episode inspired or challenged you to think differently. For additional takeaways, tips, show notes, and more about our amazing guest and sponsors, head on over to Malloryerickson.com podcast.
And if you didn't know, hosting this.
Podcast isn't the only thing I do every day. I coach, guide and help fundraisers and leaders just like you inside of my program, the Power Partners Formula Collective. Inside the program, I share my methods, tools and experiences that have helped me fundraise millions of dollars and feel good about myself in the process. To learn more about how I can help you, visit Mallory Power Partners. Last but not least, if you enjoyed this episode, I'd love to encourage you to share it with a friend you know would benefit or leave a review. I'm so grateful for all of you and the good, hard work you're doing.
To make our world a better place.
I can't wait to see you in the next episode.
What if your next fundraising event wasn't about the perfect, perfect room or a flawless run, but about building real, lasting relationships with your donors? On September 8th and 9th, join me at the Raise 2025 conference in San Antonio, Texas, where I'll share how to reimagine events as spaces for connection, trust, and true partnership. And for a limited time, you can save $250 with my code RAISE25ME. Just visit raise.onecause.com and use the code RAISE25ME at checkout to save $250. I would love to see you.
Podcast Summary: Episode 252 - "She Gives, She Leads: The Generosity Myth and What We Get Wrong About Women Donors" with Jacqueline Ackerman
Introduction
In episode 252 of "What the Fundraising", host Mallory Erickson engages in a profound discussion with Jacqueline Ackerman from the Women's Philanthropy Institute. This episode delves into the often-misunderstood dynamics of women donors, challenging prevailing myths and offering insightful strategies for nonprofits to better engage and retain female philanthropists. Published on August 12, 2025, this conversation is a must-listen for nonprofit leaders aiming to enhance their fundraising approaches by embracing inclusive and relationship-centered methods.
Guest Introduction
Jacqueline Ackerman introduces herself as part of the Women's Philanthropy Institute at the Indiana University Lilly Family School of Philanthropy. She highlights the institute's focus on gender and philanthropy, specifically:
Challenging Limiting Beliefs in Fundraising
Mallory Erickson sets the stage by addressing common limiting beliefs and biases that hinder effective fundraising, particularly assumptions about who philanthropists are and what they value. She emphasizes the need to overcome these biases to reach a broader and more diverse donor base.
Bustling Myths About Women Donors
Jacqueline Ackerman dispels several myths surrounding women donors:
Myth: "Women aren't as generous as men or don't give large gifts."
Myth: "Women are not the primary decision-makers in household giving."
Myth: "Offering naming opportunities will motivate women donors."
The Importance of Storytelling Over Transactional Approaches
The conversation underscores the preference of women donors for storytelling and impact over transactional fundraising methods. Women tend to value:
Quote (08:00): "We know that women may take a little bit longer to get to [donate]. Yes, they may want to learn more, they may want to see more background, see, hear more stories. But once they donate, they're incredibly loyal donors."
Moving Beyond Scarcity Mindsets
Both Mallory and Jacqueline discuss the prevalent scarcity mindset in fundraising, which often leads to transactional interactions that do not foster long-term donor relationships. They advocate for:
Quote (25:16): "There's so much in here that I feel like is important across so many different levels. And I feel like there's a myth we need to bust in what you're saying here, which is about that we're bothering donors, right?"
Strategies for Engaging Women Donors
Jacqueline provides actionable recommendations for nonprofits to better engage women donors:
Personalized Communication:
Diverse Recognition Methods:
Tailored Messaging:
Inclusive Engagement:
Quote (16:50): "Maintaining that communication, even if it feels one sided, is so important."
Addressing the "Lurking Donors" Phenomenon
The discussion touches on the concept of "lurking donors"—individuals who support organizations but do not actively engage or respond to fundraising solicitations. Jacqueline emphasizes the importance of:
Resources and Practical Tools
Jacqueline Ackerman mentions several resources to assist nonprofits in implementing these strategies:
Conclusion
The episode concludes with Mallory and Jacqueline reinforcing the significance of adopting a relationship-centered approach to fundraising. By understanding and valuing the unique motivations and preferences of women donors, nonprofits can foster deeper, more loyal, and more effective philanthropic relationships.
Final Quote (25:34): "I hope those resources [from Jacqueline] inspire you to make meaningful changes in how you engage with your donors."
Key Takeaways
Additional Resources
For more insights and practical tools discussed in this episode, visit Mallory Erickson's Podcast Website. Here, you can find top tips, full transcripts, quotes, videos, and additional resources to support your fundraising efforts.