What We Spend Podcast: Episode Summary

Title: Trying, Really Trying, to Enjoy Spending
Host: Courtney Harrell
Guest: Helena, Marketing Director
Release Date: April 30, 2025

Introduction

In the episode "Trying, Really Trying, to Enjoy Spending," hosted by Courtney Harrell, Helena, a 27-year-old marketing director from Brooklyn, shares her intricate relationship with money. The episode delves into Helena's financial upbringing, her current affluent status, and her ongoing journey to balance responsible spending with enjoying her financial freedom.

Guest Background and Current Financial Status

Helena provides an overview of her financial landscape, highlighting her recent salary increase and her boyfriend Ollie's earnings. Despite her substantial income, Helena grapples with past anxieties surrounding money, stemming from a dramatic family financial event during her high school years.

• Notable Quote:
  "I just feel really grateful again that I do actually have an excess of money if I'm not treating people to things or if I'm not like doing something semi extravagant every month." — Helena [01:14]

Family Financial History and Its Impact

Helena recounts a pivotal moment in her senior year of high school when her parents disclosed that a substantial inheritance—estimated at $20 million—from her late grandfather had been entirely depleted by a family member who mismanaged it. This revelation transformed Helena's perception of money, instilling a deep-seated anxiety that has influenced her financial decisions ever since.

• Notable Quote:
  "That really informed, like, a lot of my life up until recently." — Helena [12:42]

Current Financial Practices and Challenges

Despite her high income ($173,000 annually before taxes and bonuses), Helena remains cautious with her spending. She details her monthly expenses, including rent, utilities, groceries, dining out, and unexpected costs like storage fees. Her boyfriend Ollie, a tech sales professional earning over $200,000 before taxes, complements her financial stability.

• Notable Quote:
  "Flexible payments, smart features and seamless checkout options all in one place." — Courtney Harrell [00:00] (Note: This appears to be part of an advertisement and may not be directly relevant to Helena's personal financial practices.)

Helena’s Spending Experiment and Financial Freedom

Helena embarks on a week-long experiment to redefine her relationship with money by allowing herself to spend more freely. This endeavor aims to alleviate the anxiety associated with money and embrace a more balanced financial lifestyle.

• Notable Quote:
  "I need to remind myself that I really try to take advantage of the fact that I have a remote job." — Helena [41:21]

Weekly Audio Diaries: A Detailed Breakdown

Day 1: Embracing Social Spending

Helena attends her boyfriend's cousin's engagement party, leading to a day of indulgent spending on meals and Pilates classes. She utilizes her employer-provided ClassPass, which offers her free access to various fitness classes, reducing her usual gym expenses.

• Total Spending: $87.87

Day 2: Balancing Work and Social Life

A productive day filled with work tasks is balanced by reconciling financial responsibilities, including paying off a significant credit card bill ($2,400). Helena reflects on her past anxiety towards money and recognizes a shift in her comfort levels.

• Notable Quote:
  "I didn't know what my friends allowances were, but I knew that I couldn't afford to do like a lot of the stuff that they could." — Helena [20:06]
• Total Spending: $2,514

Day 3: Generosity and Relationship Dynamics

Helena dines out with her boyfriend, choosing to treat him by comping the entire meal to foster a more relaxed approach to shared finances. This act of generosity marks a significant departure from their previous practice of splitting bills meticulously.

• Total Spending: $180

Day 4: Hosting and Social Events

Engaging in social activities, Helena hosts a Tiki Tex-Mex themed dinner party, incurring expenses on groceries and attending a Lakers game. Her willingness to spend freely reflects her evolving financial mindset.

• Total Spending: $204.90

Day 5: Prioritizing Social Commitments

Helena balances work commitments by skipping a workout class to focus on professional tasks. She indulges in ordering lunch and later hosts another dinner party, reflecting her continued journey towards financial ease.

• Total Spending: $106

Day 6: Generosity and Social Spending

The day involves generous gestures such as buying rounds of drinks for friends and contributing to communal meals. Helena acknowledges her shift towards a more carefree spending attitude.

• Total Spending: $676.92

Day 7: Reflecting and Preparing for Future Adventures

Helena spends the final day of her experiment reconnecting with her parents and preparing for an upcoming trip to Mexico. She reflects on the lessons learned throughout the week and anticipates maintaining her newfound financial balance.

• Total Spending: Minimal (Parents covered lunch)

• Total Weekly Spending: $3,769

Key Discussions and Insights

1. Financial Upbringing and Its Long-Term Effects: Helena's family's financial mismanagement during her formative years instilled a persistent anxiety around money, influencing her spending habits well into adulthood.

2. Balancing High Income with Financial Freedom: Despite earning a substantial income, Helena strives to find a balance between saving for future goals and enjoying her present financial freedom.

3. Generosity as a Path to Financial Ease: By embracing acts of generosity, Helena discovers a liberating aspect of spending, which contrasts her previous anxiety-driven financial behavior.

4. Evolving Financial Identity: Helena's journey highlights the importance of redefining one's financial identity to align with personal growth and changing life circumstances.

5. Impact of Relationships on Financial Behavior: Her relationship with Ollie plays a crucial role in her financial evolution, teaching her to be more relaxed and confident in her spending choices.

Concluding Thoughts

Helena's week-long experiment serves as a transformative journey from financial anxiety to a more liberated and balanced approach to spending. By confronting her past and embracing her current financial stability, she paves the way for a healthier relationship with money, emphasizing the importance of generosity, self-exploration, and financial literacy.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• "I just feel really grateful again that I do actually have an excess of money if I'm not treating people to things or if I'm not like doing something semi extravagant every month." — Helena [01:14]
• "That really informed, like, a lot of my life up until recently." — Helena [12:42]
• "I need to remind myself that I really try to take advantage of the fact that I have a remote job." — Helena [41:21]
• "I didn't know what my friends allowances were, but I knew that I couldn't afford to do like a lot of the stuff that they could." — Helena [20:06]

This episode of "What We Spend" offers listeners an intimate glimpse into the complexities of financial well-being, illustrating how past experiences shape present behaviors and the potential for growth and change in one's financial journey.