
Actor and producer Jason Ritter talks to his friend Ted Danson about the positive impact of sobriety on his marriage and other relationships, feeling a responsibility to those who miss his late father John Ritter, playing a villain in the reboot of Matlock on CBS, and more. Like watching your podcasts? Visit http://youtube.com/teamcoco to see full episodes.
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Ted Danson
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Woody Harrelson
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Jason Ritter
I started this pattern of running away at the first sign of confrontation and so without the alcohol and with Melanie, that was the first time that I just had to sit in it.
Ted Danson
Welcome back to where everybody knows your name. Jason Ritter is one of my favorite actors. He's incredibly talented. He carries the legacy of his family forward in everything he does, from Happy endings to the deal to Parenthood for which he was nominated for an Emmy. He's also currently starring in Matlock which airs on Thursdays on cbs. I've known Jason for years. My family adores him. All of our kids knew him and grew up when they were younger with him. Mary has worked with him several times. I worked with him, worked with him once. He is a super funny, creative guy and I can't wait for you to see for yourself.
Woody Harrelson
Jason Ritter, everybody. I can't tell you how many people in my family got the hugest grin and giggle and started reminiscing about you.
Jason Ritter
Oh, my God.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. Your best friend back then, Simon.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, Simon Halbert. Still, still great friends.
Woody Harrelson
So Mary, my wife Mary said that you were in our kitchen on prom night with Simon, right?
Jason Ritter
That's right.
Woody Harrelson
Yep. You guys were not a couple but you went to the prom together or did you have dates? I can't.
Jason Ritter
No. That year I believe we just went. We tried not to stress ourselves out. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Charlie McDowell sends his love.
Jason Ritter
Oh, my gosh, I love him so much.
Woody Harrelson
My daughter Kate, who doesn't know that I was talking to you today, would send all her Love.
Jason Ritter
I love Kate. Your entire beautiful family is just Lily. Lily, Alexis.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. Amazing. Amazing. And you all went to. Most of you went to Crossroads.
Jason Ritter
Yes. Yeah. Lily and Kate and I were in the same class.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. Yeah. Does talking reminisce? You know, is it like, oh, Lord, I have to now pretend to be that age again?
Jason Ritter
And no, I, I, it's so fun. I, I mean, I, I, I remember those days very, very well. And, you know, there were a lot of lovely people in our grade, a lot of who I'm still very close with, so.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
That's very cool. Simon especially.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, Simon especially. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
That's great. I don't even know where it kind of let me jump around, which is what I do. But the other huge connection to our family is you and Mary were in. Oh, Amber Tamblyn, and now Joan of Arcadia. Thank you.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
For like, three or three years. Four years.
Jason Ritter
I think it was only two. Two years. Yeah. There was a really. Yeah. Two seasons at least it might have been over the course of three years by the end. But, yeah. Yeah. Which was absolutely incredible.
Woody Harrelson
That was a great show.
Jason Ritter
It was a really great show. It really was meaningful. And also, you know, happened to come at the very difficult point in my life. And so to, to have lost my dad around the time that we were shooting that show and then get to see Mary every day was just so lovely and healing and wonderful. And, yeah, Mary and Joe just were. And the whole cast and everybody there was really there for me in that time. But I love Mary very, very, very much.
Woody Harrelson
And she. You. He also went to. Did you guys work on stage together?
Jason Ritter
Yes, yes. We did a play called the Beginning of August.
Woody Harrelson
Beginning of August. At the Atlantic Theater.
Jason Ritter
Yes. That was so fun. That. Very exciting. That was before Joan of Arcadia. So I was.
Woody Harrelson
That was you right out of. Pretty much out of NYU or.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, I was actually still going to the Atlantic Theater Company, but they allowed me to have to get credits for my diploma in rehearsal for that play.
Woody Harrelson
Right.
Jason Ritter
Which was so much fun.
Woody Harrelson
We're going to bounce. Keep bouncing. And my thing was, you and I, we didn't meet because I'd met you before, but you and I met at the airport going to work on the Larry Kasdan movie Mumford.
Jason Ritter
Yes, exactly.
Woody Harrelson
And I remember looking at you going, oh, Lord, I used to go to work with my friends. Now I'm going to work with my friends. Kids.
Jason Ritter
Yes. Yes. I remember that very well. I was so. That was my first job ever.
Woody Harrelson
Wow.
Jason Ritter
And my first professional job. I had done Plays and stuff in high school. But yeah, I was so excited. And I remember seeing you at the airport and saying hello.
Woody Harrelson
Who else was in it? There were other.
Jason Ritter
Well, Zooey Deschanel is in it. Simon Helberg also was in it.
Woody Harrelson
Oh, my God.
Jason Ritter
But it was Lauren Dean and Hope Davis and Pruitt Taylor Vince and Mary McDonnell.
Woody Harrelson
Yes.
Jason Ritter
Oh, there was so many. Priscilla Barnes. There were so many lovely people.
Woody Harrelson
And the amazing Jason Lee. Yes, thank you. And Larry Kasdan.
Jason Ritter
And Larry Kasdan. Yeah. Who was lovely. And it couldn't have been a better first experience. Oh, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Very exciting.
Jason Ritter
It was very exciting. And I really love that movie. I remember when it came out and we all took a little group to the theater and it was fun.
Woody Harrelson
I made the mistake of I was some sort of playing some sort of bit of a pompous, bit of an asshole and I was talking to somebody and I had a big snifter of brandy, supposedly.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
And a cigar.
Jason Ritter
Yep.
Woody Harrelson
And you know the rookie mistake of. And I wasn't a rookie, but the mistake of on the first take, you know, taking a huge bite of a sandwich that then you have to eat the rest of the night, I took a massive puff of my cigar, blew it into the brandy snifter and then inhaled it. I have never been sicker in my life.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah, yeah, I made that. I've made that cigar. Inhaling the smoke mistake.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Myself.
Woody Harrelson
It's going to look cool.
Ted Danson
This first.
Jason Ritter
Yes, exactly. It did look cool. It looked great.
Woody Harrelson
Take 40.
Jason Ritter
Oh, my gosh. I did the same thing with some dip. I had to have some dip. And instead of study. Yeah, well, I, I maybe could have done something else, but I was trying to be focused and real and then instead of spitting it out, I mean, instead of keeping it in there, I would spit it out every take and put a new one in. And I didn't realize that was like, you know, it's strongest at first and then it kind of wasn't. So I, I ended up throwing up after that show.
Woody Harrelson
I grew up in Arizona and all the cowboys and ranchers were into dip.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Hard days were. And bars.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah, yeah. The little thing.
Woody Harrelson
Molasses and. Yeah, yeah, that's tough. That, that's tough. I have been, you know, reading, looking, seen snippets of you here and there for the last two or three days. You're you. You are such a wise. From my point of view, because I was a late bloomer, such a wise, loving, caring, full blown human being. My Mother used to say, my wish for you, Ted, and my sister was to be fully human. And when I listened to you talk with your wife, Melanie, and about your dad, about acting about everything, there's such a rich kind of fully human part of you. And I'm assuming that. I'm assuming it was probably always there, but after sobriety, it probably became the full blown. You. Because with sobriety, all things are possible.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, I think that had a huge element to do with it. I think there was. I think the alcohol had. I think there was the side of me that I wanted to show the world, and then there were the parts of me that I felt embarrassed about or something, or the other sides of me that I was trying to push down or push away. And the alcohol was mixing it all up together. And I think in a way, after the sobriety, I was sort of forced to reckon with all of the different parts of me and make peace with the things that I didn't like. And I mean, as the prayer goes, work on change the things you can and have the serenity to accept the things you can't change and wisdom to know the difference. And that's been a huge thing. I've always tried to. You know, I've been to therapy many times in my life. I've always tried to get to the next level. I've. I've never. Anytime I found myself in a cycle, I've wanted to break out of it and. And figure something else out. And so I, I do feel like in this chapter of my life, I've. I've gotten to a place where I'm at least, I'm at least acknowledging. I don't know. At every age, I felt. You feel like now I get it. I was a kid then. I didn't really know, but now I really know. And I have come to this chapter to realize that that's probably a recurring thing throughout life.
Woody Harrelson
Now. I know you got it.
Jason Ritter
I got it. Yeah, exactly. And. And I love, I love growing and changing. It's exciting.
Woody Harrelson
That's my favorite quality in a person.
Jason Ritter
Me too. Me too.
Woody Harrelson
The willingness to keep growing, keep looking,
Jason Ritter
because it can be scary. You know, you, You. You found something that works on some level for you and to, to let some of that go. You know, having to let go of the, the party Persona that I thought that I needed in order to be around your brain.
Woody Harrelson
Your mind says, oh, you do, pal. Yeah, you do need it.
Jason Ritter
You do need it.
Woody Harrelson
Don't be doing this work. I'm here to protect you.
Jason Ritter
Just Listen to me.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Oh, are you happy? You're so boring now. Oh, God. But, yeah, I remember. I remember that. That. That voice in my head.
Woody Harrelson
Did you go through that? Am I gonna still be creative?
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Because there were. There were elements in which I felt like that was important and that. And in hindsight, it was. It was all just sort of Dumbo's magic feather. I. You know, in. In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have had alcohol on set if I had to be a little tipsy. But I. You know, there's all these ways in which you can tell yourself these stories about these brilliant people who were method or did this this way. And. And then I remember I worked with this amazing actor, Ryan Onan, and he has never had a drop of alcohol in his life, and he can play drunk better than anybody because he stayed sober and watched. Watched people. I went, oh, right, the observing part. No one's going to test my blood alcohol level after a scene.
Woody Harrelson
But that was full of shit. You were sober.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So it was. Yeah, I was very worried about that. And. And I worried because one of the things that I thought alcohol helped me with was my self consciousness. And so the only way to get out of my attention to myself was to obliterate myself.
Woody Harrelson
What was your self consciousness like?
Jason Ritter
Just very, very, very concerned about what anybody and everybody thought about me and trying to guess what they thought and trying to do a preliminary strike on their opinion of me and really feel kind of crazy if someone didn't like me. I remember there was this one time where I was at a party and I was telling a story and I got to the end of it, and the majority of people kind of laughed or enjoyed it. And one person went and rolled her eyes and walked away. I was like, excuse me, miss, can you please? What happened? What went wrong? Because I think there's. There's got to be some miscommunication here. It really drove me crazy, and it was hard for me to understand that, you know, people have other things that are going on and they're not necessarily thinking about you as much as you
Woody Harrelson
are thinking about, I think, nice guys, because I'm sure you would not. You're still. I think that before and after me, I was a hot mess right before I met. I was a hot mess all my life, but then finally addressed it when I was right. About a year before I met Mary, my wife. My silhouette probably isn't that much different, but I had to work so hard.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
To be that, Ted.
Ted Danson
I was Working overtime.
Woody Harrelson
I was exhausted. I couldn't even have a conversation longer than five minutes at most before I go. Hey, excuse me, I gotta, I'm gonna go smoke a cigarette or I gotta go to the bathroom. I'd make some shit up. Oh, yeah, to, to go catch my breath from performing, Ted.
Jason Ritter
Right? Socially, yes, absolutely.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Yeah. I mean, that's incredible. I still have an issue with disengaging from conversations. A conversation at a party will die a slow, natural death. And I'll go, so what else are you saying?
Woody Harrelson
That because you're watching me work right now. No, you bastard.
Jason Ritter
No, no. But it's just so funny, that sort of people pleasing thing as a tough one to kind of let go of and go, you know, the truth is, I don't want everybody to like me, you know, I mean, yes, I do, but I, but there are certain people where, you know, anytime I've gone on Twitter or something and someone has said, not like a fair criticism of me or something like that, but like one of the truly cruel and mean things when you look at their profile. I always do this. I always, like, look, I'm like, who is this person who's saying this very mean thing to me? And it's just a list of horrible things that they're saying to people all over the place. It would be very painful if it was like, they were such a nice and lovely person and it was all about, you know, what charities they're supporting. And then they just one jab to
Woody Harrelson
me, Jason, just pisses me off.
Jason Ritter
Exactly. But for the most part, you know, and so it's always this, this lake of negativity. And so I've been much better at sort of understanding that and going, I, I'm not going to be able to, to clean this lake up and help and get this person to like me and, and do what they, they don't seem like I would want to be around them, so why am I going, no, but just gotta change your mind about me. Okay. You just have to.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah, I, I was raised to be nice. I was raised to be sensitive. I was kind of my mother's confidant. You know, my father wasn't as in touch with his emotional side, so I, you know, so I was just really nice, kind, considerate, but I, and my mother had trouble with her dark side. She couldn't deal with petty, mean, anger, anything human.
Jason Ritter
Right.
Woody Harrelson
But on the kind of other side of the ledger. And I kind of grew up that way. And the wonderful thing to, when you start to realize you You're a dick. You're a mean dick. You're capable of horrible, mean things. Is then you get to choose. Right. And then being nice has meaning.
Jason Ritter
Right, Exactly. Because it's not just a performance of a scared person who's, you know, hoping you don't look beneath the mask. You're. You're actually, you know, you're aware that you have the capability of really hurting someone's feelings, and you're making the choice not and do. And absolutely. You can't avoid that. And I mean, I still have a list of every single person that I've, you know, hurt or disappointed in the back of my head. But. But I, you know, ignoring that doesn't make it go away. Just trying to be nice and offset the. The pain that I've caused.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. I often say about Mary, because I'm. I'm. I still go to my charming card, you know, play that. Even though I may not be. I think I am, you know, and I think I'm kind and nice. Yes, Mary is.
Ted Danson
Is kind. That kind of deep kind that changes people's lives.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
I make them happy in the moment. Mary has the ability to. To change people's lives with her kindness. And.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, my. My wife is the same way.
Woody Harrelson
I felt that when I was listening to you guys.
Jason Ritter
She really is. And I remember also when I got to know Mary, just thinking, like, if I could only be so lucky to be with someone this beautiful in every possible way. Just so genuinely kind and lovely and funny and incredibly talented and all of it. But just like.
Woody Harrelson
And you did.
Jason Ritter
And I did. I did.
Woody Harrelson
You did.
Jason Ritter
I really did. And it is so funny because it's like, like you said, I'm like, hey, do you like me? All right, see you later, Melanie.
Ted Danson
Good talking.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, good talking. All right. Keep that impression of me and I'll be over here. Meanwhile, Melanie, you know, is. Is forging these wonderful, beautiful, deep relationships and helping people through tough times. And, you know, not to say that I'm like a fair weather friend. I've definitely have been there for people in tough times. But. But yeah, the, The. The level of true kindness that both of our wives have is pretty inspiring.
Woody Harrelson
I love that. I love that you had to meet her a handful of times.
Jason Ritter
Oh, my God.
Woody Harrelson
Each time anew.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
Right?
Jason Ritter
Yeah. I mean, that's just my. I've learned a lot of things about my brain over the years.
Woody Harrelson
Have you ever at a party met the same person coming and going at the end of the party and said, how do you do?
Jason Ritter
Yes, I Have done that. Yeah. I always am just the guy who's going. Do I say? I'll just say, nice to see you, just in case. I don't know. I have no idea. I just woke up when I saw the movie Memento. I was like, that's what I feel like. What am I doing? I'm at a party. Okay. Did I meet you? Great. Yeah, we seem like we're friends. No, we're not friends. Okay, good clue. There was one time where I was crossing the street and I saw I was getting to the other curb and this woman looked over at me and she made a gesture like this. She opened her arms and opened her mouth and like this. And what I read from that was, we know each other. We went to high school together or something. And I gave her a big hug and as soon as I wrapped my arms around her, I felt her stiffen like this. And I went, oh, sorry. And she was like, I. I just. I watched this show that you had. She had just recognized me or something like that. But I. I assumed from the social cues that a hug was appropriate. And I was wrong. I. And I apologized.
Woody Harrelson
My saving grace is I find when I'm an asshole, it's kind of funny.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
I don't mean to no one else, but to me.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
You know, oh my God, what an asshole. You thought that person was waving at you and so you gave him a big wave and it's the person behind you.
Jason Ritter
Oh my gosh. I've done that so many times. But yeah, with Melanie, she showed me a picture of the brunch that we had hosted together a month earlier among other people. But yeah, it was. Yeah, that was an embarrassing moment.
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Woody Harrelson
You met Melanie many times, but then you really started to get to know her before you were sober.
Jason Ritter
Yes. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
And that was and impetus, if I'm reading that correctly.
Jason Ritter
Yes. Yes. When you were saying, you know, you had started this work about a year before you met Mary, or else she
Woody Harrelson
would not have even seen me. We would have been going down different hallways.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, absolutely. It was like that in reverse. It was about a year into us having an on and off relationship and before she went, you know what? I can't, I can't. You can keep drinking. Absolutely. But I can't be around. I will. Yeah. So totally up to you. And then there was a period of time where I knew that if I had even one more sip of alcohol, that I would never see her again. And I knew that that was a. That was a hard boundary that she had made and she was going to honor it.
Woody Harrelson
And it wasn't about, you're a bad person, which could have made you defensive.
Jason Ritter
No, it was painful for her. It was confusing. It was, you know, if I went out and I just. My phone died or, you know, something like that, her brain would be wondering and worried and, you know, all these things like this. So it was just. It was giving her too much anxiety, and she knew that it was unhealthy for her, and so she was like, I won't do it anymore. And it was interesting because I had tried to get sober a couple of times before, and then I would. And it is hard at the beginning because when you're one week in, you can relapse and be at that same place in a week. It's different when you lose years or something and you're starting over at day one, but you're like, oh, day one was just right there. So I'll just do day one again tomorrow, and you can do that. And I did that for a year or so. And I think, in hindsight, I think it was because I didn't really. I wasn't. I didn't really care about, like, myself that much at that point. And so at the beginning of that time with Melanie, I knew that if I took another sip and I started that thing over that I would lose this forever. And I just could never cross that line. And it was easier for me to not cross that line when it was for her than for me, which was. Which is weird in hindsight. And now I'm sober for myself.
Woody Harrelson
But initially, it's easy to not realize what's really, really at stake. And when you do, it makes all the difference in the world.
Jason Ritter
Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
And then finding out why and having empathy. Oh, I totally get why you did that.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
I'm so sorry. I get it. But feeling sorry for that little kid or person or whatever who thought this was the way to go.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, I know. And it was interesting as well, because I had always run away. That was sort of my. You know, emotionally or. I mean, definitely any potential physical fight. I was very fast. So anytime there was a.
Woody Harrelson
It did.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah. If there was, like, an issue at a bar or something like that or someone, you know, scooted their chair out, it was just like, hey, let's go to the other. I don't want to get into a fight with this guy, Whatever you think, you're fine. You're right. I'm. Let's go.
Woody Harrelson
Oh, I thought you were about to say the opposite, that you got into fights.
Jason Ritter
Oh, no, I never got into fights. I always would try to avoid it or try it.
Woody Harrelson
Let me make you laugh for a second.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And so, yeah, I always would run away. And, you know, there have been times where I would get into arguments with other people, and it would feel circular or feel like it would never end. And so I just. I would. I would. I started this pattern of running away at the first sign of confrontation. And so without the alcohol, and with Melanie, that was the first time that I just had to sit in it and go. I had to remove the tool of running as fast as I could out the door, out of my toolbox of ways to deal with things, and it was uncomfortable. And it really also helped in a lot of ways because you learn how to communicate differently with each person in your life.
Woody Harrelson
You're also blessed, as am I, that you're with a person who will look at her stuff.
Jason Ritter
Absolutely.
Woody Harrelson
You know that. So you're encouraged to look at your stuff.
Jason Ritter
Absolutely.
Woody Harrelson
Without thinking, oh, I better not let my guard down.
Jason Ritter
Yes, yes, yes. That is huge. And she. You know, she has. We've both grown so much from the time that we've met. And I often think that if she had. If she had been a little healthier when we met, we may not have ever. She.
Woody Harrelson
She would have recognized you.
Ted Danson
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Jason Ritter
So we kind of met at this perfect crossroads and then helped each other up and out of it. But. But yeah, I'm grateful for the work that we've both done.
Woody Harrelson
Without sounding old and not patronizing, but something. I'm so happy for you.
Jason Ritter
Thank you so.
Woody Harrelson
And I'm happy for her. I don't know her, but you guys get to witness each other and laugh and go through life and have a baby and all that stuff.
Jason Ritter
Yes. And our daughter is so funny and weird and strange and lovely, and she's the best, and we feel very, very, very lucky. But, yeah, you know, it's funny because you. The alcohol had told me all of these things about myself that I believed were true, that I couldn't be responsible. At a certain point. I thought I knew I would love to be a father, but I thought based on my behavior over the first 30 years of my life, I went, maybe I'm not responsible enough. Maybe I can't do it, and maybe I just have to Let that go. So the fact that once I took the alcohol away and then it was like that Bugs Bunny cartoon where the monster gets some powder sprinkled on, and then it's just tiny and very manageable. It's still there going, hey, y.
Woody Harrelson
True.
Jason Ritter
But I can go. All right. It'll take you a couple months to walk back. Yeah, exactly.
Woody Harrelson
So. What a hoot.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, I'm very.
Woody Harrelson
Also, something just stuck in my mind and we can edit it out. No, we won't. It sounds. Sorry. Boy, we can edit this part out, the stumbling part. But my thought was this morning driving and how. How proud your father is and your mother is about how you. Who you are.
Jason Ritter
Oh, man.
Woody Harrelson
You know, you reflect them really beautifully. Thank you for saying that.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, I, Yeah, I, I know my mom is proud of me, and I, I, I feel that my dad would be proud of me. You know, I, I, it's funny when someone goes away, you sort of. You can still kind of have conversations. You know them so well at a certain point that you can imagine what they might. How they might react to a thing here or there. And so I definitely, I definitely feel. I mean, he really loved all of us kids so fiercely and really believed in us in a beautiful and intense way. And so, yeah, I can definitely make myself feel it. There are also times where I just. I feel his absence so keenly, you know?
Woody Harrelson
His absence? Yeah, not his absence from your mind or your heart, but just his physical
Jason Ritter
absence, you know, like, oh, something amazing and wonderful will happen, and I'll just go, oh, yeah, I, you know, what if he was right here?
Woody Harrelson
How old were you?
Jason Ritter
When I was 23, and I was the oldest, so I, you know, everyone else got even less time, but, but, yeah, it was, it was a, it was a. It was definitely. I had to work really hard to understand that that was the whole story, that, that was the whole book of my time on this earth with him. And, you know, initially, it just felt like, no, there's got, there's more chapters. Someone ripped out the back, but I'll find that back somehow. And to sort of just see the, the beauty in the time that we had together was, you know, it was hard to get there. But I appreciate our entire relationship a lot more now.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. But, yeah, it must have been hard, too, because you weren't just dealing with your grief, your family's grief. You had to deal with the entire world.
Jason Ritter
World.
Woody Harrelson
You had to host the entire world's feeling of loss for your dad because it was so out of the blue. And he was so beloved, it. It shook people's. Oh, dear Lord, if it can happen to him. You know, kind of all of that. You had to host, too. Must have been. It is.
Jason Ritter
It's. It's amazing. I mean, there. There's. There will still be times where I'll meet someone and they'll. I'll know what's happening almost immediately. They'll usually say, your dad. And then they will well up.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
And I. I know that we're about to go back to this place that now I've processed more and I have ups and downs, and grief is such a strange boat to be in, but. But, yeah, where I experience it with someone who has fresh in it or seeing me somehow evokes this emotional reaction, and it's really beautiful. There are also some times, pretty early in my relationship with Melanie, we were on a date, and we were at this restaurant, and we were sitting at a bar, and this woman on the corner asked me if I was my dad's son. And I said, oh, yes. And she went, oh, my God, I loved him. And she did kind of get emotional, and she just started to say, you know, how much she loved my dad. And then she just went rip. And just, like, started talking, started talking to her friend again, but it was such a barrage. And then she just turned around, and Melanie was right there, and she had never seen that before. And so I spent about the next two minutes just talking to this woman's bag, going, oh, thank you so much for bringing it up. You know, I haven't talked to even some of my best friends about it, but, you know, I really appreciate you. This is so. I. You know, and I. I think my dad was really wonderful at finding the. The funny moments, even in the. In the midst of pain. One of the stories that I remember, which is very similar to this one, was when his father passed, a guy from his college went up to him and went, hey, man, I heard about your dad. Condoles.
Woody Harrelson
Oh, I have to.
Jason Ritter
Oh, it's condoles. I don't have time for the full. For the full word.
Woody Harrelson
I am that person. By the way, Mary's watched me go from bless your heart, not in that Southern phony way, but my mother always said, oh, bless your heart, and meant it.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
Then I went to bless you. And now she's saying, do you realize you just say bless.
Jason Ritter
Oh, bless. That's so great.
Woody Harrelson
I'm an asshole. Yes, I am. Let me add one more thing, and then we can move on. We'll start dishing on Your dad in a minute.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
No, no. Does your dad ever hop in when you're acting and go for a ride? Mine does. I can literally go, where the fuck did that come from? Oh.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Did you enjoy the ride there, dad? And he will. Literally everything will come out slightly like my dad.
Jason Ritter
That it? Yes, that definitely happens to me and often really would happen. Yeah. In. In auditions, you know, I would come in and I would do it the way I had practiced, you know, a hundred times, and it was probably kind of rigid and, you know. And then every once in a while, you know, a casting director would go, try it this way. And I go, oh, that's great. I have no idea what to do there. And I just sort of jump off the cliff and try it. And there have been times where those have been the best moments in my auditions. And I'm like, that didn't feel like I did that. And I also can see it sometimes, and I don't even. I'm not aware of all of the ways in which he influenced me. So sometimes I'll be watching Matlock or something and I'll go, oh, my gosh. That was just so his face. Which is weird because I've had people tell me that, but it's. I haven't. I'm seeing it more and more myself now.
Woody Harrelson
I mean, sometimes I do it purposefully or it just feels liberating to me if I. If I think of my dad all of a sudden, some boundaries or stiffness disappearing. But also, there are times where I swear, it's like. And I'm jumping in. This is too much fun.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yes, exactly. Absolutely. Absolutely.
Woody Harrelson
Matlock. Yeah. Very cool.
Jason Ritter
Very fun.
Woody Harrelson
And you had. Wait a minute. I was about to say. And nobody knows you're the bad guy.
Ted Danson
Clearly.
Woody Harrelson
They do.
Jason Ritter
Yes, they do.
Woody Harrelson
I wouldn't have known, but what was that like, keeping how long? Wait, when did you find out?
Jason Ritter
How long before I found out that Julian had hidden the documents about four episodes before the episode where you find out.
Woody Harrelson
Month or two.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, a month or two. Which was very exciting. And it's so much fun. It's fun to play a character that some people are just like, I hate this guy. Let's put him in jail. Melanie being one of them. And then other people going, no, his father influenced him. And. Poor guy. I love that there's varying opinions on him. It's really fun.
Woody Harrelson
Were you tempted to turn the corner and twirl your mustache?
Jason Ritter
I always am tempted to twirl my mustache, but I love you. Know, I think one of the things that I love about this character is he, for sure, he knows he made a mistake, but he cannot take in the fact that he did this horrible thing. Everything is sort of, you know, what we do, we justify it to ourselves or we blame somebody else, or we, you know, we don't take full accountability of our actions, or at least we don't take into stock the ramifications of what we did. So, you know, he's. Up till this point, he has up to the point in the first season when you find out he's been, you know, living his life being a pretty good dad. He has a very deep, dark secret that he's put way far back in the closet, and he's just hoping that his good deeds will offset that in the future.
Woody Harrelson
And pardon my ignorance, are you coming back as your character?
Jason Ritter
I am coming back. I am coming back. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
So you're to get your comeuppance.
Jason Ritter
Yes. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see. It's. It's. The finale's coming, coming right up, and we. Yeah, we just finished shooting all of it. So I know the whole story up to the end of the season two, and I don't know what season three is going to be like. I'm very excited to see what they come up with.
Woody Harrelson
It's just exciting to have season three.
Jason Ritter
I know. I didn't think it existed.
Woody Harrelson
Lord, nowadays, it's in.
Ted Danson
Thank you.
Jason Ritter
I know.
Woody Harrelson
No, it's a great show. Thank you.
Jason Ritter
Great show. I think we've had quite enough of that. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
I'm terrible at secrets. I've told this before. But on the Good Place, my character, you start off thinking he's one of the architects that's just in the Good Place, that I'm a good guy. And when it was pitched to me early on and to Kristen Bell, we were the only people. Not even the directors that were hired or any of the other actors knew that I was actually, no way torturing them, because I actually was on the dark side. And you'll find out at the very end of season one, I was told, so my friend John Krasinski, this is right before we started shooting, was going off to make some big, huge movie and become this big, huge movie star.
Jason Ritter
I know.
Woody Harrelson
And he said, so, what are you up to? What's going on with you? And wanted to impress my friend. Not that I'm competitive. I'm only competitive with people 30 years younger than. Than me. But I said, well, you know your friend Mike Shore, because you did The Office with Mike Shore. We're doing a show called the Good Place, and it takes place in heaven. And I'm the architect that builds and designs the heaven for the people who are coming. Passing over. And I saw him kind of nodding, going, okay, I got it. Behind his eyes. I thought he was saying, yeah, okay, it's the office, but in heaven.
Jason Ritter
Got it.
Woody Harrelson
And I saw that. I went, no, no, you don't understand. Oh, my gosh. And I had to pretend that I hadn't. We were called into the office and said, don't, you know, don't tell anybody. It'll ruin this. And I had to, like, eat it and finally confess.
Jason Ritter
We have to. We have to kill John Krasinski.
Woody Harrelson
Yes.
Jason Ritter
I'm sorry. Sorry.
Woody Harrelson
I did call. I said, please, my career's in your hands. Oh, my gosh.
Jason Ritter
Oh, I. I am also like that with secrets. I'm like that Kristen Wiig character who's just chewing on her sweater trying not to spill it.
Woody Harrelson
I'm more her character than, oh, yeah.
Jason Ritter
Molly Shannon.
Woody Harrelson
Molly Shannon.
Jason Ritter
So good.
Woody Harrelson
God, they're funny. Funny ladies.
Jason Ritter
Funny ladies.
Ted Danson
I've just learned about a serious but rare heart condition called attr. Cardiac amyloidosis, or attrcm. If you have attrcm, you may experience symptoms related to heart failure like breathlessness and swelling of the legs, but also have issues that seem unrelated, like carpal tunnel. There's a treatment option that may help. Called Atrube or Acharamatis. Atruby is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with ATTR CM to reduce death and hospitalization due to heart issues. In a study, a TRUBY helped slow the progression of ATTRCM and reduced heart related hospitalizations by 50% when compared to people not receiving ATRuby. Tell your doctor if you're pregnant, plan to become pregnant, or are breastfeeding, and about the medications you take. The most common side effects were mild and included diarrhea and abdominal pain. If you have attr cm, talk to your cardiologist about a truby or visit attruby.com that's att r u b d y.com to learn more. Brought to you by Bridge Bio Liberty
Liberty Mutual Ad Voice
Mutual customizes your car and home insurance. And now we're customizing this rush hour ad to keep you calm, which could help your driving. And science says therapy is great for a healthy mindset. So enjoy this 14 second session on us. I think you've done everything right and absolutely nothing wrong. In fact, anything that hasn't gone your way could probably Be blamed on your father not being emotionally available because his father wasn't emotionally available, and so on. And now that you're calm and healing, you're probably driving better, too.
Jason Ritter
Liberty.
Ted Danson
Liberty.
Jason Ritter
Liberty. Liberty.
Woody Harrelson
So did I read that you are here, that you just got cast in.
Jason Ritter
Yes, in the Last of Us.
Woody Harrelson
The Last of Us.
Jason Ritter
Sorry. Yes. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Well, that's exciting.
Jason Ritter
It's really exciting. I was a huge fan of the video games, and Melanie got a part in the first season. And I remember because she had just gone from. She had this period of time. It was pretty. It was like from six months after our daughter's birth. There was a period of time where she just was working one after the other. And the last of us came along, and she was like, I'm so tired. And I went, after this, you can just. You have to do this, and then. And then you can rest. But so she did it. And Craig Mason, the showrunner and one of the head guys over there with Neil Druckmann, who did the video games, he knew that I was a big fan of the games. And in the first season, he allowed me to be one of the infected clickers in this big stunt scene. And so that was really fun. And I kind of thought, well, my dream has been fulfilled. I'm technically in this game somewhere. So the fact that I get to actually come back as a character is just so, so exciting.
Woody Harrelson
When do you start that?
Jason Ritter
I've done two days already, and I have. I think I have another day in a couple weeks, and then I'm done.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. When do you do start, Matlock?
Jason Ritter
September. And that's just right here at Paramount, which is really lucky as well.
Woody Harrelson
I love Paramount.
Jason Ritter
That's so nice. It really is nice.
Woody Harrelson
Mary and I got to work together the second season of A Man on the Inside that Mike Shure.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Wrote and directed. He's amazing. But, oh, my God, it was just delicious to work with her.
Jason Ritter
Yeah. Melanie and I have gotten to work together a handful of times, and it's always just so fun. She's just so. She's so fun to work with. I mean, aside from, you know, being married to her. She's so funny. She's always so in the moment. And it's really fun. It's really fun.
Woody Harrelson
I hate people who are always in the moment. I'm 50. 50.
Jason Ritter
Me, too.
Woody Harrelson
Best.
Jason Ritter
Me too. I'm like, yeah, I'm in the moment. But I also planned a couple of things just in case the moment's not. Just in case the moment's not Exciting enough. Just got a couple things in my back pocket in case.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. Or just the fact that you say, boy, I'm really in the moment.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah, I know. Could that too. There was a time, I remember I got back from my first year of acting school in New York, and we were really talking about listening a lot. I remember I came back and a friend of mine was telling me this story, and all of a sudden I realized how much I was listening to him. And I was like, oh, wow. So this is what really listening feels like. I am just paying attention to everywhere. And then he asked a question and I had. I was so excited that I was really paying attention, that I had just fully taken all that attention and put it back on myself. It's hard. It's hard to just stay. Stay in the moment.
Ted Danson
How old is your daughter?
Jason Ritter
She's seven. She turned seven in December.
Woody Harrelson
Oh. Oh, you're in it.
Jason Ritter
I'm in. I'm deep in it. Yeah. She's a first grader.
Woody Harrelson
She's no longer under your thumb?
Jason Ritter
No.
Woody Harrelson
She's getting feedback from all over.
Jason Ritter
Oh, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.
Woody Harrelson
Wow.
Jason Ritter
She's.
Woody Harrelson
What is seventh? Is that second grade?
Jason Ritter
First grade.
Woody Harrelson
First.
Jason Ritter
She's still in first grade. And yeah, she's. She's. She still is very attached to both of us, but I can see the. The teenager starting to peek through.
Woody Harrelson
You know, there's people earlier and earlier. Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Kind of stuff.
Woody Harrelson
Any concept of what you do for a living, both of you.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, she sort of has an idea, but could care less. Yeah, she's a little bit. Like, there was one time where she said to us, guys, is it okay that I don't want to be an actor? And we're like, yes, of course. We're not, like, gonna force you into it. That would be so horrible. But, yeah, she has some idea of it. But then she'll also say things like, I wish your character would die on Matlock. And I'm like, no, you don't. Please don't say that. But she wants to spend much time.
Woody Harrelson
Dress you're wearing.
Jason Ritter
Yes, exactly. Very lucky. It's a very tough time out there right now, so let's just hold on to it as long as possible.
Woody Harrelson
Oh, we take our granddaughters. We have. Wow. 14, 14, 13. No, not 14.
Jason Ritter
Oh, my gosh. 14 year old.
Woody Harrelson
We have 14 grand. Our kids are very prolific.
Jason Ritter
I was gonna say, like, I thought I.
Woody Harrelson
We have five.
Jason Ritter
Yeah, that's. That's, That's. That seems right. That's the number I would have had
Woody Harrelson
in my head couple of one year olds. And then Lily has four and Charlie have 14 year old, 13 year old. Almost incredible. Yeah. And a eight, nine year old. And I just got them all wrong. But that's all right.
Jason Ritter
That's all right. You can air it. When they all are that specific age,
Woody Harrelson
but you think, oh, you'll take them to work and it'll be so cool for them to watch you work. And then you ask them later. Never has craft service been not the number one on their list reasons to go to work with you.
Jason Ritter
That was our daughter's favorite. She was like, so you're telling me that all of this candy is just free? I can just grab it and say, yeah. I mean, I don't think you should eat all the candy, but yes. Yeah. You can just go up to this
Ted Danson
booth and were you working early enough
Woody Harrelson
in your life that craft service went from donuts and coffee and bagels and cream cheese to this astounding spread that sometimes you eat instead of lunch?
Jason Ritter
Yes, absolutely. Yeah, it was. It was. Initially, it just felt like, are you a little bit hungry? Here's something. Here's something to put in your stomach until the real food comes. And now. Yeah, now they have all these options and choices and.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Yeah. I feel like in the craft service world, it's gotten competitive, so they have to really step it up. And a lot of people going, I need healthy options. So now there's healthy options there. And it's great. It's really great. And unlimited coffee.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah. Switching gears the world today.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
How are you doing? I mean, I wrestle with how I'm doing. Am I doing anything or enough? Is caring and spreading love and hope anything? No, probably not enough. Am I taking action here? Maybe not there. I'm always wrestling with it. Can I ask you where you are and we don't have to get political.
Jason Ritter
Yes. No, absolutely. I mean, you know, I. One of the things that I've felt is that it's. It's very hard to change someone's mind, even in. Even in your own family or. You know, a lot of people have to just have to, like, learn things for themselves and. And won't understand something or think you're lying or think you're telling. And so I never know what to do. I always feel like sometimes what I've done is basically just behind the scenes. I've donated and I've tried to do things here especially Twitter has felt like such a different place now that going on and saying something, it just feels like it's opening myself up to some of the worst comments from other people, and maybe that's not the worst thing in the world, but I just have felt like the hard thing is to know where to put your attention to affect the most change. And I also think that, you know, trying to. I struggle with all of this as well because I've always been a uniter and I've tried to make people get along and I've tried to add joy and laughter and kindness and. And it doesn't feel. It feels ineffective and it feels weak in the midst of all of this chaos. And so it's a constant struggle. I don't know what to do. I follow a lot of people and I listen and I watch them and I. And I don't know, I always feel like I should be doing more, and I don't know what that is, what the most effective way is, aside from trying to be the best person that. Or, you know, try to do instead of show. I guess that's. That's what I've. Where I'm at. And I. Yeah, I. I always. I don't. I never know. It's just gotten so crazy in the last couple years that I. I'm just hoping. It seems like every step down into the. Into hell we get, there are more and more people who seem to be going, wait a second. This doesn't seem like what I was promised. And I'm hoping that waking up keeps going.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
And I don't think my voice, and perhaps yours is the voice that, like you said, will change minds because we're predictable. You know, they've already made their assumption about us.
Jason Ritter
Right, Exactly.
Woody Harrelson
But people who are in the same world or have changed their mind or are going, wait a second, are probably the hope.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
But it doesn't mean that we. Because there's trickle down, there's, you know, there are ripples that. Kindness, love, joy, hope, nurturing, you know, kindness does have a ripple effect, and it's all I know anyway. I don't mean I'm saint, like, I mean. But it's the only thing I know that I care about putting out.
Jason Ritter
Yes, absolutely.
Woody Harrelson
And it is my lane. So, you know, for me to all of a sudden jump on the ramparts and start. That is throwing rocks is not.
Jason Ritter
Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
It's not my comfort zone, but it's also not something that I. Whatever. It's not me.
Jason Ritter
Yes, exactly. And I do feel like empathy seems to have become an undervalued quality, or at least I've seen so many people almost revel in Their lack of empathy to certain groups. And so even just to stand for someone who, to stand, to stand and to be someone who cares about people and doesn't want, you know, doesn't put one group over another or something like that. I hope people understand, you know, the end game of that. And, and, but I do feel like some people won't get that lesson until it happens to them. They, they, it's, you know, that people have a real, they can have a real sort of dog eat dog kind of view of the world. And, and I think, you know, the more that we help each other and want to help each other and say that having empathy for your fellow human is a good thing to have. But yeah, it's a really painful, dark time. I constantly feel like, is there more I could be doing? Is it effective? Am I being a coward? Am I, what can I do? And then on the other hand, there are these causes that I care very much about that are battles that are outside of that, that I, you know, am. That I.
Woody Harrelson
With people who get joy from fighting.
Jason Ritter
Yes.
Woody Harrelson
Fighting justified, you know.
Jason Ritter
Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
You know, the legal battle support that, you know. Absolutely.
Jason Ritter
Exactly. So, yeah, but I think in terms of, I try to make sure that people in, that I know personally and in my life and that, you know, and even people that I've forged friendships with online, that we are all being safe as possible and helping each other in the shadows. You know, it's a, it's a scary time where, you know, they say, like, hey, we know every single person who criticized this thing on Twitter. Now we have a list of you guys. It's scary as a father to think about that. So, you know, to be doing as much as you can behind the scenes is at least something. If not, you know, I just had
Woody Harrelson
this funny thought of somebody out listening to us going, oh, I guess what you're saying, Ted, is that it's hard to be a rich, old white male in America.
Jason Ritter
I know. I'm literally sweating. I'm so sorry. I know. I mean, that's the thing is I see so many people who are being so incredibly brave and, you know, don't have the privileges that I am in. Enjoyed and you know, and they're, they're braver and better people than me. So I try to amplify some of their voices sometimes, but, but yeah, I always am like, what I, I need to be doing more. I don't. I'm in a panic about it.
Woody Harrelson
Sometimes I ask people what their kind of North Star, what they're guiding you know, their moral compass. It feels like Melanie is a big part of that.
Jason Ritter
She is. She really is. She's incredible. She's fearless and fearless in her kindness and goodness and, you know, I think it's. I think she's. She's very resilient and in some ways that I'm, I am more fearful and, you know, not in ways that I'm proud of, but. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
I so like you.
Jason Ritter
I like you, Jason. I like you, too.
Woody Harrelson
I cannot thank you enough. I have no idea how much time we've spent, but I can't thank you enough.
Jason Ritter
Oh, my gosh.
Woody Harrelson
It makes me feel so happy.
Jason Ritter
I'm so happy. I'm so happy to see, see you
Woody Harrelson
and all our kids send much love and Mary and all that. And someday I'd love to hang with your wife and that'd be amazing.
Jason Ritter
I would love that. Could have a little.
Woody Harrelson
Yeah.
Jason Ritter
Hangout dinner party.
Woody Harrelson
We'll bring younger people, too.
Jason Ritter
So there you go. Yeah.
Woody Harrelson
Just in case you start looking over my shoulder. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much.
Jason Ritter
Thank you so much. That's so nice.
Woody Harrelson
Foreign. Thank you.
Ted Danson
Jason Ritter. Catch him in matlock. Airing Thursdays, 9pm Eastern Pacific on CBS. That's it for this week. Special thanks to Team Coco. If you've enjoyed this episode, please send it to a loved one. Subscribe on your favorite podcast app and maybe give us a great rating and review on Apple Podcasts if you're in the mood. If you like watching your podcasts, all our full length episodes are on YouTube. Visit YouTube.comteamcoco See you next time. Where everybody knows your name.
Nick Leow
You've been listening to where everybody knows your name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrison. The show is produced by me, Nick Leow. Our executive producers are Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and myself. Sarah Fedorovich is our supervising producer. Engineering and mixing by Joanna Samuel with support from Eduardo Perez. Research by Alyssa Grohl. Talent booking by Paula Davis and Gina Bautista. Our theme music is by Woody Harrelson, Anthony Yen, Mary Steenbergen and John Osborne.
Liberty Mutual Ad Voice
Liberty Mutual customizes your car and home insurance. And now we're customizing this rush hour ad to keep you calm, which could help your driving. And science says therapy is great for a healthy mindset. So enjoy this 14 second session on us. I think you've done everything right and absolutely nothing wrong. In fact, anything that hasn't gone your way could probably be blamed on your father not being emotionally available because his father wasn't emotionally available and so on. And now that you're calm and healing. You're probably driving better, too.
Jason Ritter
Liberty.
Ted Danson
Liberty.
Jason Ritter
Liberty.
Ted Danson
Liberty.
Release Date: April 8, 2026
Guest: Jason Ritter
This heartfelt episode of "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" reunites Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson with actor Jason Ritter, a long-time family friend and acclaimed performer. The conversation ranges from nostalgic reminiscences about childhood and early careers to deep dives into struggles with sobriety, family legacy, fatherhood, empathy, and the challenge of living authentically. It's a warm, vulnerable, and often funny reflection on growth, connection, and finding one's true self.
On Sobriety and Acceptance
“After sobriety, I was sort of forced to reckon with all of the different parts of me and make peace with the things that I didn't like.” [09:22]
On People-Pleasing and Boundaries
“Just very, very, very concerned about what anybody and everybody thought about me and trying to guess what they thought and trying to do a preliminary strike on their opinion of me and really feel kind of crazy if someone didn't like me.” [13:08]
On Empathy in the Modern World
“Kindness does have a ripple effect, and it's all I know anyway. I don't mean I'm saint, like, I mean. But it's the only thing I know that I care about putting out.” [56:15]
On Being a Parent
“I thought I knew I would love to be a father, but I thought based on my behavior over the first 30 years of my life, I went, maybe I'm not responsible enough. Maybe I can't do it...So the fact that once I took the alcohol away and then it was like that Bugs Bunny cartoon where the monster gets some powder sprinkled on, and then it's just tiny and very manageable. It's still there going, hey...” [30:46]
On Working with Family
“Melanie and I have gotten to work together a handful of times, and it's always just so fun...she's so funny. She's always so in the moment. And it's really fun. It's really fun.” [47:42]
This episode with Jason Ritter brings together three friends whose lives have been intertwined for decades, offering listeners an unusually open, vulnerable, and often humorous conversation about growing up in show business, dealing with legacy and loss, navigating sobriety and self-acceptance, and striving to be a better person in an increasingly fragmented world. Through stories of career mishaps, confessions of self-doubt, and moving reflections on love, grief, and kindness, Ted, Woody, and Jason remind us that the real reward in life is the honest work of being known—and knowing others—in all our imperfection.
Recommended for anyone who craves authenticity, a dash of nostalgia, and hope that growth and connection are lifelong journeys.