
Just days before his late night show was suspended by ABC, Jimmy Kimmel sat down with Ted Danson to record this episode. They spoke about Jimmy’s daily routine, the time he hosted a dinner party for Woody Harrelson and Owen Wilson, going from radio to hosting Jimmy Kimmel Live, how faith compels him to speak his mind, the indispensable role of family in his life, and more. Like watching your podcasts? Visit http://youtube.com/teamcoco to see full episodes.
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Ted Danson
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Jimmy Kimmel
I don't think of it as courage. I think of it as just obvious. I think of it as having really no choice but to talk about these things.
Ted Danson
Welcome back to where everybody knows your name. If you've been paying any attention to the news this month, you probably have an opinion about today's guest, Jimmy Kimmel and his recent suspension. We recorded this episode six days before he was taken off the air for courageously speaking his mind. Personally, I'm grateful he's back on TV where he belongs. Whether you think he's a hero like I do or disagree with him, what's indisputable is that Jimmy is a hall of fame broadcast talent. Since 2003, he's been the host of Jimmy Kimmel Live on ABC, making him the longest serving current late night host on television. An incredible streak and one we shouldn't take for granted if we've learned anything from these events. Just a lovely, generous gentleman and I'm thrilled he took the time to come straight from his show to record ours. Jimmy Kimmel, everyone. Are you a cook?
Jimmy Kimmel
Oh, yeah, I cook. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ted Danson
Italian.
Jimmy Kimmel
Oh, that's one of the things. Grill. I grill. I barbecue. I cook Italian. I am most things.
Ted Danson
And are you the cook or Molly?
Jimmy Kimmel
I am the cook in the house. Yeah. I make breakfast. It's like I'm like a short order cook. Every morning. I'm, I make waffles, I make pancakes, I make eggs. Everybody wants something different every day and so I'm in there making it. I make the dog eggs every morning. And yeah, I make all the meals.
Ted Danson
I do breakfast dog. I do dogs. Well, Mary would say correctly that she chips in on all of these, but I love making breakfast. I love bringing coffee to Mary in the morning. I love feeding the dog. And I'm great at lunches. I'm great at opening up the refrigerator and finding something and making something good.
Jimmy Kimmel
Out of what's good. That's what I like to do.
Ted Danson
Also, I'm not a dinner guy.
Jimmy Kimmel
Not a dinner guy.
Ted Danson
I'm not a cook.
Jimmy Kimmel
I love the challenge. I love like an 11:30, boy, I'm hungry type of situation.
Ted Danson
But that's.
Jimmy Kimmel
You wait 11:30 at night, you know, it's like, my wife will get hungry. Maybe we've been out and it's been too long since we ate. She's like, I'm hungry. And I'll like, let me figure something out. I go in the cabinets and I'll usually put together some kind of. I always have like a chicken broth in the refrigerator. And from there I can always put some kind of pasta together. I'll add a little tomatoes, some garlic, some little tiny ditalini pasta. Maybe I'll go out in the garden and get some kale or something and put it in there. Maybe I'll mix a little bit of. I'll mix an egg in with some polenta or semolina and drizzle it into the soup and make kind of an Italian egg drop soup. I get very serious. I don't kid around.
Ted Danson
Wow. Did you notice that when you said at 11:30, I went, you mean lunch? Because 11:30, I've been asleep for at least two and a half hours.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah.
Ted Danson
Your life is so different.
Jimmy Kimmel
I don't stay up that late typically, but on the weekends, like if we go out or something like that. Yeah, we're usually up till midnight.
Ted Danson
But you just came from work.
Jimmy Kimmel
I did. I just came from work. Just did the show. Sean Penn was on the show.
Ted Danson
Oh, wow.
Jimmy Kimmel
This kid Owen Cooper was on the show. And I was thinking about you. And I'm going to tell you why I was thinking about you, because this kid, Owen Cooper, and by now we'll know. He seems likely to win the Emmy for best supporting actor in a limited series for Adolescence on Netflix. And the. The kid who has the youngest person ever to win the Emmy, do you know who that is? No. You worked with her in a TV movie called Something for Amelia or something about.
Ted Danson
Something about Amelia.
Jimmy Kimmel
Amelia, yes.
Ted Danson
Wow.
Jimmy Kimmel
Now, she won the Emmy for that when she was 14 years old. And so I was just looking through the research and looking at it, and I saw you, and I noted that I looked up the plot of this TV movie, Something about Amelia, where I.
Ted Danson
Played the incestuous father.
Jimmy Kimmel
You play the incestuous father. And I started thinking about this. I'm like, oh, yeah, Cheers is already on the air. It's a big hit. You're Sam Malone, everybody's favorite guy, and somebody comes to you and says, we'd like you to play a man who rapes his daughter. And you're like, oh, that would be great.
Ted Danson
Let me correct you. He was very loving. Sorry yes.
Jimmy Kimmel
It was horrible.
Ted Danson
Yeah. No, it was so well done. Glenn Close was in it.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. Is that what sold you or did you sell her?
Ted Danson
Randa Haynes was the director, an amazing director. Glenn Close, really thoughtful script, so that it wasn't exploitive in any way.
Jimmy Kimmel
Did you feel like it was a risk like that maybe I shouldn't do this? No.
Ted Danson
I mean, because I was more actor at that point than. Than TV star kind of thing. I was still going to be with Glenn Close. And a really good script. He was a playwright. The guy wrote it in. In New York. So everything about it was perfect. It was so well done. I will toot their horn that laws were changed around the world as a result of the show. Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Wow.
Ted Danson
Yeah. I mean, literally, one Scandinavian country reconvened parliament the next day.
Jimmy Kimmel
No more your kids.
Ted Danson
No. Oh, see, you just. You just hung my face on that phrase. Roxanne is all.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yes, that's right. Okay. Youngest Emmy winner, Right? So.
Ted Danson
So as I was preparing for this, you know, as the actor, you know, what if? What if, what if. And you could. And I spoke to people who had not committed incest, but people. People who had worked with those people or tried to talk with them. And everybody told me that it was such a taboo that you could understand people's motivation right up until the line that they crossed. And then they're goners. You can't get anything real from them. But Ted, the actor was going, trying to get there. And most I could come up with is just tell the truth, don't be bad acting. So that people can discount the story and say, well, that's not me. That's not. So then flash forward to. We were out in Malibu, and we had a house that was next to Steve McQueen's son and Steve McQueen's son. And I'm blanking. I'm sorry. On his name. Would have young, beautiful people all over on the weekends. His part of the beach. And I was on a balcony looking down, and I was. This was before I met Mary. This was, you know, whatever, 40 years ago. And I looked down, I went, wow. Oh, my God, look at that girl. Oh, my God, she's gorgeous. Cut to later walking down on the beach. And that gorgeous girl came running up to me and said, hi, Ted, it's Roxanna Zahl. And I flushed with so much shame, I went, I now understand what I was trying to act.
Jimmy Kimmel
This was many years later, 40 years later.
Ted Danson
Oh, my God. Shame.
Jimmy Kimmel
Wow. That's what I think they call that full circle.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, yeah. Well, I was impressed. I was impressed because that seemed ballsy to me. But now that I hear your story, it seems more actory than anything.
Ted Danson
Yeah, it was. So I just can't fathom your day. What time do you go to work?
Jimmy Kimmel
I go, I don't go. It's. My day is regimented and every like, 15 minute period is accounted for. So I wake up, I will make the family breakfast. I then exercise a couple of times a week. I then will go through the written material that's emailed to me.
Ted Danson
Time is it, please? By the clock now.
Jimmy Kimmel
I get up at 6:45, we get the kids off to school, I go to the gym. I then go to my email. I look at about 30 pages of jokes and material, scripts that has been.
Ted Danson
Written by Molly and Company, our writers.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yep, yep. I whittle it down to about five pages. I rewrite stuff, I send it to them. We then have a segment producers meeting over. Zoom. We talk about the guests that night. I drive into work.
Ted Danson
What time?
Jimmy Kimmel
At 11:15, I go to rehearsal. At 11:30, we have rehearsal. We go up to my office.
Ted Danson
Rehearsal means going through whatever skits or bits or the monologue.
Jimmy Kimmel
And the monologue and looking at about 30 clips from the news and deciding which ones we're going to use. We figure out what order we're going to put them in for the monologue. And then I work with two other writers and we write the monologue for the night. I put makeup on, I go downstairs.
Ted Danson
Somebody makes a mistake of turning on CNN and going, oh, shit.
Jimmy Kimmel
And then if something happens, we start over again. And the truth is, it's a huge pain in the ass. But it's fun. It's fun because you're suddenly in a race against time to get these jokes on the air. And if it's a big, you know, Trump does crazy stuff and you're like, well, we can't not have this in the show. And also the east coast shows will not get that stuff a lot of times because they've taped earlier than we have. So it gives us a little advantage. So we really want to make the most of it and we try to. And then we put the show on, we tape it, and I go home.
Ted Danson
Now, your wife, Molly, she does work there, right?
Jimmy Kimmel
She works there.
Ted Danson
She's an executive producer and writer.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, head writer, Executive producer.
Ted Danson
Does that mean she has to go in earlier than you, or.
Jimmy Kimmel
No, she goes in. In fact, I'm there more than she is yet. Yeah, she goes home a little earlier than me. She watches the Monologue and goes home.
Ted Danson
Okay, I have to just stop and say, in our household, Molly and you, I'll get to you in a second. But Molly is, like, heroic. And I think she did a. I don't know that this is true, but at the Oscars, when you all had the previous Oscar winners present or not present, but just right when she was executive producing the Oscars, every nominee would be talked about by a previous Oscar winner in that category. So I do believe, and Mary does that Molly said, oh, let's get Mary to introduce Emily because they're great friends.
Jimmy Kimmel
That is absolutely true.
Ted Danson
Emily meant so much to Mary.
Jimmy Kimmel
Oh, how nice.
Ted Danson
Hugely. And I don't know if Mary's had the opportunity to thank Molly directly, but this is us thanking Molly indirectly. I will pass that along, please.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. Well, I think Molly talked to Emily and said, who do you really have a relationship with? And she said, oh, great, Mary. Perfect. All right, let's do it.
Ted Danson
She's still heroic. And what I loved about that Oscar, that was the first time that happened. I do believe.
Jimmy Kimmel
I don't know.
Ted Danson
I think it is. But what it made us all in the audience feel was a sense of community. It wasn't just, oh, someone, you're going to have a winner, and you're going to have a bunch of losers in the next few minutes. No, you're going to understand that all of these amazing actors are, you know, celebrated by all of us in the room, as opposed to holding your breath to see who wins.
Jimmy Kimmel
It's interesting that you say that, because I have, like, similar. But maybe the converse of that, in some ways, the roasts, like, you know, how the roast used to be so much fun. And you'd see these, you know, these Don Rickles and Bob Newhart and these people who were friends. Yeah. Milton Berle. Roasting each other. And then it was like that, I think, when the roasts revived at the end of the 90s and like, you know, early 2000s. But then they became such a. It became like a business thing. And you'd have these roasts with these subjects of the roast being roasted by people they. They never even met because they were just booking the show. And it just. That's when I was like, you know what? I don't want to do these anymore. And I think maybe they've come back around to only using people who know each other. But it's weird when, like, they just go out and get, you know, somebody. Some comedian or some actor who's famous and they know is a good name. To have on. On the bill to roast somebody that they've never met before.
Ted Danson
They don't have license to do that. Really?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. There's no chemistry. There's no relationship there. Yeah, like, there was.
Ted Danson
I love our community and I love that you were part of that. Bringing that back. That was pretty cool.
Jimmy Kimmel
Well, thank you. And I. I just have to say. Cause I was drove. Driving over here and I was thinking about this, and, you know, I try to, like, remember the opportunity to sit here and talk to you for an hour is very exciting to me. And if you told me this when I was like 17 years old, I don't even know. I don't think I would be able to complete my life. Like, I'd be. First of all, I'd be telling everybody, you know, about 40 years I'm going to be sitting with Ted Danson in a room and just chatting about stuff. And it is exciting to me because you really are one of my favorites. And I will also say that we have recently started binge watching the Good Place with our kids. And we love it, and it's so, so good. And you're so great in it.
Ted Danson
And Mike Shore.
Jimmy Kimmel
It's so amazing, right?
Ted Danson
Yeah. Okay. This is embarrassing. That meant a lot to me. I soaked it up and I'm good. Thanks.
Jimmy Kimmel
Okay, good. That's the way to do it.
Ted Danson
Nice to see you.
Jimmy Kimmel
It is funny because I know that, like, some for some for me, anyway, sometimes. And I have friends who host podcasts, and I have people that I admire who, if they ask me to be on, I'll come and do it. And it's fun because you get to have a real conversation. I mean, of course there are people listening, so it's a little different than the conversation we might have alone. But you really get to have. I mean, there's. And there's nobody bringing food, and there's none of that stuff that clutters the mind when you do. And I like that. My first time I really spoke to Conan was on his podcast and we had a great conversation and we've become friends since then.
Ted Danson
I don't know if this is true for you, but I don't hang out with guys.
Jimmy Kimmel
You don't?
Ted Danson
No. I have great work relationships. I love going to work and hanging out with friends and doing something together. And I love them and I will love them forever. So it is a relationship. But, you know. Do you want to go have a beer? Ah, no, I want to go home to Mary, you know, to be honest. And. Well, I remember so this is wonderful.
Jimmy Kimmel
I think maybe you mentioned this to me when we were talking about the podcast on the show, that one of the reasons you're doing it is because you don't get to see Woody Harrelson anymore.
Ted Danson
Yeah, still don't. By the way, you see that little sign? Ted Danson and Woody Harrell. Sometimes we're thinking about crossing that off and saying rarely.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. Because, you know, Woody's all over the place. He doesn't like to be pinned down.
Ted Danson
But he's also working nonstop.
Jimmy Kimmel
He's working wonderful. He is working a lot. Woody and I are friendly. Woody came over to my house once, and this was really one of the funniest things that ever happened to me. I have to say.
Ted Danson
I love Woody's stories.
Jimmy Kimmel
I like to cook, as I mentioned, and I know Woody is a vegan, and so I was prepared for that. And it was. Woody and Owen Wilson were coming over. It was the afternoon. It was a rare, like, afternoon visit. I was like, you know what? I got a pizza oven. I'm gonna make these guys some pizzas. So I fire up the pizza oven, and they come over, and they're a lot of fun. They're immediately. They're, like, competing with each other, very competitive. It just, you know, it's really, like. It's remarkable. They're like children, adults, you know? And Woody is talking to my wife, and I'm out in the backyard cooking, and. And he says, hey, do you. Do you mind? What's the address? I want to order Domino's and Molly. This is Woody is Woody. And Molly says, what? And he said, yeah, I just want. I want to. Give me the address. I can order Domino's. And she says, listen, I just have to tell you, Jimmy's going to be really upset if you order Domino's. He's very serious about his pizza. And, you know, he's been. He's cooking for you. And Woody and Owen, like, looked at each other like, he's going to. He's going to be upset. They didn't understand at all.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Turned out they wanted to order the game. Dominoes. Somebody to bring a game of dominoes over and that. This is like pre Instacart. So even the idea of ordering a game was alien to us, and luckily, it turned out to just be that.
Ted Danson
But you were making the vegan. He's past vegan. He's in the air.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. Then I learned that he wasn't even eating bread. But I think just to be courteous, he did eat. He did eat some of it. Yeah, yeah. I don't know what he eats, but he manages to find something.
Ted Danson
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Jimmy Kimmel
So there you are.
Ted Danson
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Jimmy Kimmel
I have a prank going at work right now, and I feel comfortable sharing this with you because by the time.
Ted Danson
Because that guy or girl won't ever listen to this podcast is what you're saying?
Jimmy Kimmel
No, but by the time you put this out, I think it will be over. It's getting close to being over already. But we got these two guys at our show, both riders, Danny and Josh, and they're very good friends. Danny's kind of a snappy dresser. He's a. He's a sca kid, and he's. You know, he wears. He. He puts a lot of thought into his dress. Josh does not. And Josh got promoted. And Danny said, you know, Josh, maybe want to start dressing a little nicer. And Josh was offended by this, and. But Danny stuck with it. And he said, you know, it's like, what do I should dress like you? And he's like, yeah, no, but, you know, just start, you know, look like an adult rather than a college kid, you know? So now I spent the next couple of months studying Danny's clothing and purchasing every item of clothing that he owns, duplicating it, ordering it, stockpiling it. I go away for the summer, we come back for the summer, and now we get a tip every morning of what Danny's wearing to work. And Josh wears the identical outfit. And we're on day three of this now, and Danny has lost his mind.
Ted Danson
Total innocence. He knows he's been pranked, but not how.
Jimmy Kimmel
He is certain that I'm behind this somehow, and he's threatened to sue. And he's become very paranoid, accusing various people in his life of being in on it. He cannot understand what's going on and how we know what he's wearing. We're looking at his ring cam is the real answer.
Ted Danson
And as he exits.
Jimmy Kimmel
As he exits his home, that's a.
Ted Danson
Scramble to get it all assembled.
Jimmy Kimmel
It is a scra. Well, no, because we were storing it all in my dressing room at the office. So he comes into work, and he changed into whatever Danny's wearing that day. And then we converge at rehearsal, and Danny looks at Josh, who sits next to me on stage and goes, what the fuck is going on here?
Ted Danson
That's great.
Jimmy Kimmel
It's real psychological warfare. Yeah, it's kind of a win win. Because Josh gets new outfits and Danny learns not to trust people. Yeah, we have fun.
Ted Danson
You're good friends with John Krasinski, if.
Jimmy Kimmel
You know what, honestly, that 11:30 at night meal thing was mostly for John, who lived across the street from me for a long time. And he would come over every once in a while and go, you got anything to eat? And I'd be like. Like he was my son. I'd be like, sit down at the counter, pull out the garlic and start cooking.
Ted Danson
He. I love him. I miss him too. Haven't seen him for a while. Did he ever tell you the George Clooney. We'll get off this kick in a minute. George Clooney, the definition of crazy fans. This is the topic of this story. Yeah, he's making leatherheads with George and they're in a small town somewhere in the south or something, and they've kind of taken over Main street as they're, you know, want to do movie companies. And it's lunch. They have blocked the traffic and they call lunch. And George is being walked over by, you know, I don't know, security or something back to his trailer. This is all starting to happen in the same moment. John's across the street starting to walk to catering, and they release traffic. And that moment then takes place wherever George is walking. And a car, a lady soccer mom, normal, maybe in a suv, drives by and sees George and screams. George opens the door, runs around towards George, is tackled or restrained by. I mean, because she's really over the top by security. She's not put the car in park. So the car is still driving down the street with the door open. Some smart, fast thinking. AB runs after the car, leaps into the moving car, slams the brake on, turns around, and there's a baby in the baby seat in the back of this car. That's how crazed that woman was to see George Clooney, that she ran out of a moving car with her child still in the backseat. Isn't that the most astounding kind of fan story?
Jimmy Kimmel
And it wasn't like John was the baby or anything like that. It was. No, no.
Ted Danson
Oh, yeah. They're just the witness.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. I think George Clooney has that effect on people.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. Although that child should be taken away from that woman. I mean, no matter how much he loved George Clooney.
Ted Danson
It would have been interesting to describe. Hear her conversation with her husband that night. Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Wow, that's crazy. Yeah, I don't get anything like that. I've never had that Nor I. No.
Ted Danson
Okay, my turn. Mary and I talk about you a lot when we watch and see you. You are very funny.
Jimmy Kimmel
Thank you.
Ted Danson
You are very funny. You're very real and approachable and genuine. Whether you are or not, you certainly come across that way. And the courage you have when you share your personal life, your sadnesses, your things, and that makes you so accessible and then the courage you have to take on things that are just wrong and people, some of us, you know, are trying to look the other way and you look directly at it and you go after it, whether it's this administration or what. And that courage is really admirable. I really admire you.
Jimmy Kimmel
Well, thank you. I appreciate that. I don't think of it as courage. I think of it as just obvious. I think of it as having really no choice but to talk about these things and to say these things. Just the way I was brought up. I think it makes perfect sense. It especially bothers me being brought up Catholic in a very. In a very positive Catholic environment, that Christianity is something else has been co opted and, and perverted in such a way. And that, that, that I find especially upsetting and that I think about what Jesus would think of this stuff, you know, and, and I mean, it seems pretty plain that he wouldn't. He wouldn't think it's great, that he wouldn't approve of nannies being yanked out of the park and thrust into a van to be returned to their home countries because their paperwork is not in order. That just all really seems very obvious to me. And I think that it is to almost. I think it is to most people, but it's become this us versus them. It's been come almost like sports where I root for the red team and you root for the blue team and everything the blue team does is good and everything the red team does is bad and vice versa. And I just sometimes I hope, and maybe foolishly, that it will resonate with at least those people who don't have their minds completely made up.
Ted Danson
Yeah, I don't know. I keep asking people sometimes on this podcast, you know, how's your heart? How are you dealing with this? I mean, it feels like you have a platform to draw attention to it and do it in a humorous way. So that must relieve some of the pressure on your heart. But it still just feels like. And I don't know whether my. I don't know what to do is reminiscent of other people who'd let things go too long around the world throughout history. And then all of a sudden we're in a really bad place. I don't know.
Jimmy Kimmel
Well, I don't know what to do either. But I think we start by acknowledging the truth. And you know, it's interesting when you know people, when you get to know people, like for instance, like when Ellen came on television, most people in the Midwest, I shouldn't say this, but a lot of people who are watching that show in the Midwest maybe didn't know somebody who was openly gay. Right, right. And so they are against gay marriage. They see it as, you know, against their religion or whatever, for whatever reason, and they're against it. But then they get to know somebody like Ellen and they go, well, she seems okay. And then they say, well, now I feel like I have a friend who's. Or you know, one of their children comes out and they suddenly have a different perspective on that. It seems like the perspective this like, we've gotta stop. The immigrants are coming from places that don't have a lot of them. You know, I mean, I know for me and living here in LA for the last 30 something years, I know a lot of people who, who came to this country illegally, if you want to call it that, and who are great people and who. Not only are they not a drain on our society, they're contributing a great deal to our society. I mean, even if you look at this issue selfishly, which I think a lot of people do, you know, even if you look at it selfishly, it does not make sense to kick these people out. Besides the fact that it's just like, how can you go to church on Sunday and think this is okay to do to these families, to do to these people and to be so cold about it and for there to be. Now, listen, okay, I get it. There's. There are things, you know, I would understand if I'm an immigrant who followed all the rules and came into this country and, you know, jumped through all the hoops that I might be somewhat resentful of somebody who, you know, snuck in in some way or whatever. But, you know, people are just looking for better lives. They're just trying to improve their lives for their families, for themselves. They come here, they work hard, they, when you want to believe it or not, they are paying taxes. You know, everything that they, they bias taxed. And anybody who's not paying them in the proper way is part of whatever the problem is. It's like if you choose not to pay regular income tax, Social Security tax to your employees or whatever, you have no right to say you need to be out of this country. I mean, it's hypocritical. It's anti. Everything that I personally believe. It's heartless. It's cruel more than anything. It's just cruel. And I just don't.
Ted Danson
And it has nothing to do with, I mean, does immigration need to be fixed? Yes. And there was an attempt to do that in the Senate and then it was stopped because that wouldn't be good politics. So it has nothing to do with trying to fix the problem. Clearly there's an issue, but it isn't about fixing it.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. And since when are we so since when are Americans, I thought we don't follow the rules. Like, you know, a gumption. And you figure out a way to make it and you figure out a way to do this and you, you know, this is part of our personality as a country. And what could be better than these people who really want to work, who want to send money to their families, who want their children to be born in this country and to be educated and to have a better life and to contribute and all? What's the, what's bad about that? I, I just don't get it. I, I, I just don't get it. It just seems mean. It's just mean.
Ted Danson
And here we are.
Jimmy Kimmel
And here we are and it's, you know, it's, and it's going to pick up again. And you go, what can I do? And you know, and boy, I admire these people who will be out there and they see this happening and they intervene and they, and they, you know, do their best to protect these less, these vulnerable people, their neighbors and whatever. I really admire that. But then they get arrested and then they have to deal with this. And it's just, it's just really, you know, this idea that, like, states rights are, is, you know, conservative ideal that the states have, you know, can make their own decisions. It seems, it's very, they cherry pick that. Yeah, a lot. And you know, it's like, hey, listen, you know what? I think if you polled Californians, we want these people in our country, in our state, you know, we want them here. They are. We have positive experiences with them. We want them here. It doesn't make any sense to me.
Ted Danson
All right? And then I look at myself and go, and what are you going to do? You know?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, yeah. Well, it's tough. You know, I think, well, I think we've, I think we both done our best to make sure the right people were in charge and we didn't win. Unfortunately, I don't feel like we've done nothing. I think that's the most important thing you can do is make sure there are decent people running your. Your neighborhood, your city, your state and your country. And I think we do a pretty good job of that in California. But on a national level, we seem to have screwed that up. And now most Americans, I think, would agree. I mean, I think that, you know, if you were to believe these polls, I don't think people are happy with the way things are going. I don't think anybody ever imagined when he talked about sending these criminals, I mean, everybody's like, yes, if they're in Ms. 13, yes, of course they shouldn't be here. They shouldn't be committing crimes in this country. But now we're like, you know, penalizing nannies. It's sick.
Ted Danson
I should be asking Stephen, not you, but how did that go down? I kind of peripherally heard about him being let go of and whatever amount of time is left. Walk me through that, can you? I mean, psych.
Jimmy Kimmel
I mean, I can tell you what I guess, you know, I don't think anybody will ever know what the.
Ted Danson
So we don't know for sure that he was fired because of quid pro quo kind of thing.
Jimmy Kimmel
We don't know it for sure. But I do know, I mean, what I do know for sure is that some of the information that has been released by the people who let him go can't possibly be true. There's no way he's losing $40 million a year. There's no way it's even close to that. I know how the finances of late night television shows work, and it's just ridiculous. It doesn't make any sense at all. So when you hear things that are obviously lies, you have to assume that there are more lies behind it, right? Yeah. And that's what I think.
Ted Danson
I'm going to go on a show when we do publicity for A Man on the Inside coming up second season. And I probably. I discovered that I'm. We're related.
Jimmy Kimmel
You are.
Ted Danson
We're distant cousins.
Jimmy Kimmel
Wow.
Ted Danson
Yeah. Do you ever watched Finding your Roots?
Jimmy Kimmel
I've been on it. Yeah, sure.
Ted Danson
Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know how at the end they say you are. You know, scientifically, I could see that. Yeah, right.
Jimmy Kimmel
You guys have a similar. You, you have a. I'm the slower. Similar spirit, I think. Yeah, I'm a little slower.
Ted Danson
He's the fast joke, I'm the slow joke.
Jimmy Kimmel
You know who I found out was my cousin on that show.
Ted Danson
Who?
Jimmy Kimmel
Martha Stewart.
Ted Danson
I love that.
Jimmy Kimmel
Have you might explain me in the kitchen together, you mean? What do you mean by that? Have we been together?
Ted Danson
No. Have you had the opportunity to tell her that?
Jimmy Kimmel
You know, it's funny, I was on her show, the show she did with Snoop Dogg. The cooking show, yeah. And I told him, I said, listen, this is something that I learned on Finding my roots. And it did not make the episode. It was on the cutting room floor. And I'd like to tell Martha I want to surprise her with this information when I come out. I said, so please don't tell her, but I want us to be a surprise. And they were like, okay, absolutely. I was like, don't, because I just don't tell her. Okay, we will not tell her. Segment producer brings me out, I step on stage, he goes, so I hear we're cousins. And I look over the segment. He's just off stage. And I look over, I just shoot an icy glare. I was like, yeah. Yes, we are. Anyway, yeah, it's funny because my mother, like, when Martha Stewart became a phenomenon in like the 80s, my mom couldn't get enough of it. Like, my mom was like making her own scotch tape, that kind of stuff. She was really into it. And I was like, oh, my mother with this Martha Stewart, it's ridiculous. And then come to realize she's through. My mom related to Martha Stewart. So there might be something running through our blood that makes us interested in this sort of stuff.
Ted Danson
Hi, I'm Roman Mars, host of 99% Invisible. It's a podcast about all the thought that goes goes into things most people don't even think about. You're going to see stories everywhere. Follow and listen to 99% invisible wherever you get your podcasts.
Jimmy Kimmel
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Ted Danson
To review and approval.
Jimmy Kimmel
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Ted Danson
You were Arizona boy for a while.
Jimmy Kimmel
I did. I went to Arizona State. I lived in Tucson as well.
Ted Danson
Arizona State. What is that? Tempe?
Jimmy Kimmel
That's in Tempe. Yeah.
Ted Danson
Yeah. I was a Flagstaff kid.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. Would you go to nau or you just grew up there?
Ted Danson
No. Just grew up there, yeah. Wow.
Jimmy Kimmel
I don't know. I don't know too many people. I have some Friends from Flag, as we call it.
Ted Danson
But did you go up to ski ever up in the ski.
Jimmy Kimmel
No, I'm not really a skier, but I would go up to visit my friends at nau. A friend named Darrell Brown, who let me when he was in college, I liked to draw. You know, I was gonna be an artist when I. When I was in college. And he said, yeah, will you draw all over my room? And so I drew all over all of the walls of his room. I put cartoons on the whole thing. And him and his roommates, they loved it, and they had it for, like, three years. And then when they had to move out of there, I think he said they had to put, like, six coats of primer over it to get, you know, to be able to rent the place out again.
Ted Danson
And what were you doing then? Were you. Did you know that you wanted to be, you know, a radio host?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. You know what I did when I was in high school? I was working a clothing store called Miller's Outpost. Do you remember that stuff? Yes. And there's this other kid who worked there, and he worked at the college radio station, KUNV in Las Vegas. And he said, you know, you're funny. You should come be on the radio. And I was like, oh, I'd love to be on the radio. And at the time, I loved Howard Stern. My uncle would send me cassette tapes of Howard, and I'd listen to them, and I said, I'd really love to be on the radio. So he set me up with a meeting with the program director, and the guy hired me. He said, what I want you to do is find local people who are well known in the area and make fun of them. And I was like, okay, that sounds great. So I would call people who did local commercials, these guys, and have them on the show and lightly goof on them. And the first time I did it, I found this guy named Fred who was a used car dealer in the area, and he'd say, if I can finance him, and I will, I can finance you. You know, that was his big tagline. So I had him on, and, you know, we had a funny interview. And then I went home, and my mom and my dad and my Aunt Chippy were all, like, sitting in the kitchen. I walked in, they all clapped, you know, and. And I was like, wow, this is really. This is something like, you know, I grew up in a very loud family where everyone was talking at once all the time. And I think it was just like. Like, oh, somebody's list. Now, this is a way for them to listen to me, like to actually have their undivided attention. And I fell in absolute love with that. I mean, still to this day, like, going into a radio station is very exciting to me. And I. I just. I started meeting, like, local disc jockeys and they would put me on the air here and there. And I wound up getting a radio show in Seattle with one of those local disc jockeys. He said, I got a job doing a morning show in Seattle. Do you want to come with me and be my sidekick? And I went up there. It was called the Me and Him Show. He'd say, I'm me, he's him, let's go to the phones. And we did this morning radio show. And I was in love with it. And that's what I did until I wound up on television.
Ted Danson
And David Letterman. David Letterman, huge for you, right?
Jimmy Kimmel
And he started in radio. That was also part of why I was interested in it. Yeah, there's nobody.
Ted Danson
Why. What is it about everybody says this and especially in your line of work.
Jimmy Kimmel
That he was at my age too. Yeah, yeah. Because Johnny Carson was such a fixture in our lives and so beloved not just by parents, but by everyone. Right, right. And it just seemed like that was Johnny Carson. That's the, you know, late at night, that's the greatest thing you could ever have. And then this guy comes on afterwards and he's just doing like this weird version of the show. And I remember thinking, like, this is from me. This is. I. I found it. Whatever I was looking for, I didn't even know, but I found it here on this show. And the first person I ever talked about, I think the first month I watched Letterman, I didn't mention it to anyone. Nobody. I just stay up late and I was transfixed. And I mentioned it. My. My grandfather, actually, I went over my grandpa's house and he goes, you ever watch this guy Letterman? My grandfather would stay up till like 4 o' clock in the morning, watch TV and watch working on art projects. And I was like, yes, are you watching? He's like, yeah. And we bonded over this love of Dave. And then I. Then it became like a thing. Like it's, you know, I had Late Night with David Letterman. Like, the chemistry book was my book cover. I. My license plate on my first car said late L8 night. And I never thought, like, I want to be a late night talk show host. I never imagined there would be other late night talk show hosts other than Johnny and Dave. You know, this is before everybody started getting talk shows. And I never even thought about being a. Like, it never occurred to me that you could be a writer. If I'd ever had that thought even one time, that would have been my goal. But it never came to me. And I didn't know anybody in show business. You know, I didn't, you know, we weren't from a show business family, and I didn't have any connections or really no plan for college. College was like the 13th grade for me. You know, I was a good student in high school, but, you know, like in August, after I graduated, it's like, so I guess I'll go to unlv, you know, and they're like, yeah. And I went to UNLV for a year and followed by Arizona State and got involved in radio. And the way I wound up on television, I never intended to be on television. I would have been perfectly happy being on the radio. But I was on, in la, I was on this radio station, kroq, with these guys, Kevin and Bean, and they were very popular. And people would listen to the show who were producing TV shows. And from time to time I would get a call like, hey, you're funny. Do you want to come audition for this or that or whatever? And I, you know, I was always looking for a little extra money. I made no money. So I would say, yeah. And I wound up on a game show called Win Ben Stein's Money.
Ted Danson
Right.
Jimmy Kimmel
I remember that on Comedy Central. Wow, that's funny that, you know. And that was. That's how it started for me, your show.
Ted Danson
Now, what was that moment when somebody came to you and said, do you want to do this?
Jimmy Kimmel
Well, it was the same guy who hired me for Win Ben Stein's Money, like eight years later. Michael Davies, he was an executive at abc. He's the producer of who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Which I now host. I know he's a, you know, he's just a guy who recognized my talent when I was young. And he said, he went to Lloyd Braun, who I think, you know, who's the president of ABC at the time, and he said to Lloyd, listen, I got this guy. I know you're looking for a late night show, which none of us knew.
Ted Danson
Who was in that slot?
Jimmy Kimmel
No one.
Ted Danson
No one.
Jimmy Kimmel
No one, really. Nightline was in the slot. And then Bill Maher show, Politically Incorrect followed it. And then Bill Maher wound up upsetting all the affiliates and they wanted him off the air. But the truth of the matter is, I think Bill likes to say he was sacrificed in the way that Colbert. But the truth of the matter is they'd offered that slot to Letterman already and Letterman said no, he went to CBS instead. So they were in the market for something in that slot. They wanted a traditional late night talk show in that slot, which nobody knew. They were almost about to hire Jon Stewart. And John and I have the same manager, James Baby Doll Dixon. And James was about to close this deal for John to host the show. And Michael said, I want you to watch a tape of this other guy. And Lloyd watched the tape and he was like, I think this might be the guy. And he brought the tape to Bob Iger. And Iger said, yeah, I think this might be the guy. And they called me in for a meeting under false pretenses because they couldn't.
Ted Danson
Did you know anything of this was going on?
Jimmy Kimmel
I didn't know any of it. I knew none of it. And they called me in and they said that they wanted to meet with me about a Thursday night variety show, which I was not interested in. And they said, come on, meet the president of abc. I went in. We never talked about me doing a show. He just asked me a bunch of questions about Letterman. And we talked about letterman for like 90 minutes. And then he decided that I was going to host the show. And I found out about it because my wife happened to be friends with his secretary who was married to my partner on the air, Adam Carolla. And she called and said, hey, they're going to offer Jimmy the late night talk show at abc. She's like, they're going to offer you the late night talk show at abc. I was like, what late night talk show at abc? There's no late night talk show there. But it was a very strange thing because John and I had the same manager. Now he's in the difficult position of having to tell John, like, you're not going to abc, but Jimmy is going to abc. And, you know, I. That was a mistake. By the way. They definitely should hire John if I'm in that position. There's no question. I hired John 100 times out of 100. But they, I think the Bob later said, Bob Iger. I said, like what? You know, what was it like? Why? This is quite a leap that you guys made. I was, you know, I was on the man show I was doing football picks on on Fox, NFL Sunday. Like, what was it? He goes, well, you were cheaper. And everybody laughed, but I knew he wasn't kidding. So that's, you know, just it. Sometimes it pays to be cheaper.
Ted Danson
And then you had you were hand. Did somebody, a very smart producer come along and guide you? How did you put together that first night?
Jimmy Kimmel
We screwed. Everything on the first night was we thought we did well. But looking back, I mean, like my vision of hell, like when I watch the Good Place, I think my vision of hell is being forced to watch my first year of shows.
Ted Danson
I hear you.
Jimmy Kimmel
Because it is just as painful as anything could get for me. It took us a long time to figure it out, and we were very fortunate to get a long time to figure it out and somehow we wound up getting good ratings. I still don't know how that was, but though they were good enough to keep us on the air, even though I was causing trouble once, every like two and a half months, some major thing was happening.
Ted Danson
That came out of your mouth.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, yeah, something that came out of my mouth, you know, and. And caused the whole thing. And, you know, it was like just tumultuous. And the show was live at the time. You know, the first few years, first couple of years we were on live, as we kept the title Jimmy Kimmel Live, even though the show's not live because we don't want to change everything. But didn't you.
Ted Danson
I read something that some guy, I can't remember the actor's name, who was so filthy or whatever that they put in that delay.
Jimmy Kimmel
The actor's name was Thomas Jane. And we had a delay, but he cursed so many times that he, you know, the delay only works once and then it's got to catch up. He cursed so many times that the affiliate said, this show is either going to be on tape or it's not going to be on. And. Yeah, and so we were forced to. And then we said, okay, but we want the show to be as timely as possible. So instead of taping from 9:05pm to 1,005pm, which is what we did, we're going to tape from 8:05pm to 9:05pm this is on the. On the west coast, of course, and. And then the show will start airing the moment that we wrap the show. So it was essentially live because we had no time to edit.
Ted Danson
Right.
Jimmy Kimmel
But we could bleep if we needed to.
Ted Danson
They could bleep?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, bleepers, Right. Standards and practices bleep. And we kept them very busy at that time.
Ted Danson
Obviously you did look back at that first year.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah.
Ted Danson
Do you recognize Likable Jimmy, or were you tight Jimmy?
Jimmy Kimmel
I think that's all I had.
Ted Danson
But see that. No, that's a big thing.
Jimmy Kimmel
It is a Big thing. Yeah. It's probably the most important thing.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah.
Ted Danson
You're a nice man.
Jimmy Kimmel
I think also there was an element of people feeling sorry for me and, like, kind of rooting for me because I seem to be dying on television.
Ted Danson
He's a nice kid. All right.
Jimmy Kimmel
Let's give him a chance. He's drowning.
Ted Danson
Yeah. And your parents, were they just crazily, happily happy for you?
Jimmy Kimmel
It's weird for me because my dad at that time was the age I am right now.
Ted Danson
Oh, wow.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. And I now try to imagine, like, one of my kids launching something like that. And how I just. I don't know. They never seemed that nervous. I don't know what they. Somehow I bamboozled them into thinking that I knew what I was doing, but I didn't know what I was doing. And I would pray that they canceled the show sometimes. I didn't want to quit because I didn't want to disappoint all the many people who worked for me. But I couldn't. I was just. I couldn't do it anymore. It was like. Like we didn't have guests many times. Now, keep in mind, this show was on, you know, we go on, on the air live at midnight at 12:05, and there were times where it was 5:30 in the afternoon and we didn't have guests for that night's show. And I would just have to pick up the phone and call my friends. And, like, that's not how you go into a show, you know, like, you can't operate that way because this wasn't an institution that I in. This is just the time slot that we filled, you know, and so I would have to. You know, sometimes we'd have the same guests on, like, you know, on a Wednesday and then again the next Tuesday, you know, because we just needed somebody and they were my friends or my girlfriend, Sarah Silverman. I asked her to come on a lot.
Ted Danson
I love her.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah. And, you know, we. We just. We just go. David Allen Greer, Adam Carolla, Kathy Griffin, Anthony Anderson. They were just on over and over and over again. God bless them, because I needed them. And they were always ready at a moment's notice to come on and eventually, eventually stabilized and we figured out how to do it. And you start building running bits, which helps keep you afloat and all these things that we didn't have. How did Frank, my Uncle Frank, Uncle.
Ted Danson
Frank come into being?
Jimmy Kimmel
So my Uncle Frank is my uncle. He was actually divorced from my Aunt Chippy, who's my mom's sister. And I always thought he was a character. And he was always just this funny presence in my life.
Ted Danson
He was a policeman, right?
Jimmy Kimmel
He was a policeman in New York for 20 years, and then he retired. They decided they were going to move to Florida. They went to Florida. They stayed with some friends. They put a deposit on a house. They went back to the friend's house. They looked out in the backyard, and there was an alligator in the swimming pool. And my Aunt Chippy, we were living in Brooklyn at the time, my Aunt Chippy said, I didn't raise three daughters to have them eaten by a fucking alligator. And they decided. They lost the deposit and decided to move to Las Vegas, where he got a job as a security guard, first at the Frontier Hotel, and then later at Caesar's Palace. He became the Italian security guards at Caesar's palace would almost automatically get assigned to Frank Sinatra.
Ted Danson
Was that back then?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, back then. Oh, wonderful. Yeah. This was like 1975, probably, and he got assigned to Frank Sinatra. And my grandparents lived there with them. They moved out there with him. And our family's very close. It was only a matter of time before we followed them out there. And we did follow them out there in 1977. And it was a great place to grow up. It was exciting. And I. But I realized my Uncle Frank was this character. I mean, he's just like. Like fun. Like he's this old man, even when he was young, you know? And I started putting him on the radio when I was on the radio, like, if we do a show, if we go back to New York and do the show, he'd move back to New York, I'd put him on. And my. I remember my co. I never was sure if other people would find him as funny as I did, but Kevin and Bean, my co workers, just couldn't get enough of them, you know, they was like, this guy's unbelievable. So when I started doing the show, I knew I would need support. I knew I would need people to go to. And I called my uncle.
Ted Danson
Was he day one there?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, he was there day one. I called him, I said, I want you to move out to LA. He's living in New York, working at St Patrick's Cathedral as a security guard. I said, I want you to move to LA and I want you to be a security guard on my show. And he's like, he didn't understand what I was talking about. He didn't understand that he was going to be on the air. He just didn't get any. He just didn't know what I was talking about. He was kind of open to it, but somewhat reluctant. And what really clinched the deal was he found out that the bank where he had a checking account had a. A branch near the apartment my cousin had found for him. So he's like, okay, is he going to want to transfer his bank account account? He moved to LA and he was a hit immediately. He was like, people loved him immediately. He was funny, right?
Ted Danson
I did. I probably was trying to look hip, like I knew or something. But the first time I went out of my way to greet him as I came in or something. But from then on, he was so genuinely nice to me.
Jimmy Kimmel
He was a very nice guy.
Ted Danson
I'm sure he was nice to literally everybody, but he was like an important ambassador.
Jimmy Kimmel
He only arrested six people in 20 years. He would just tell them he didn't want to arrest people. He would say like, don't do this again. Get out of here. One of the arrests was by accident because the guy had stolen a lamp from a store. And he was running out with the lamp and my Uncle Frank happened to be on his beat and he's like, stop, stop with that lamp. And the guy froze and he goes, drop the lamp and get out of here. And the guy wouldn't run because he thought my Uncle Frank was gonna shoot him. And my Uncle Frank's like, he was forced to arrest the guy. Never gave a ticket. He had rules like, this was New York too. New York. He'd say, I never give a ticket to a woman. Never give a ticket to a parent. Never give a ticket. And by the end of his list of qualifications, there was nobody that got a ticket. He was like, never give a ticket to anybody. Driving, you know, it's like, it was crazy. So he was a character and he was loved immediately by everyone, everybody. And then he was joined by Guillermo, who is my security guard now, who I adore, who is, you know, also treasure.
Ted Danson
Very funny.
Jimmy Kimmel
Very funny and genuinely funny. I mean, people don't even realize how funny he is. Like, he does impersonations of everybody we work with. Like they're hilarious. Or like Guillermo's version of our standards in practice guy, Guillermo's version, you know, you name it.
Ted Danson
How did you find Guillermo?
Jimmy Kimmel
He was in the parking lot. God sent him to me. He was in the parking lot. Our announcer Dickie and our warm up guy, Don, knew him from just mingling. You know, they didn't have a lot of work to do in the day, so they chit chat with Guillermo and they're like, this guy's funny, you know? And Guillermo would sleep in our announcer's car while he was supposed to be working. He'd say, hey, leave the keys. And he would take a nap. Well, he's supposed to be guarding the parking lot during the show because everybody's in watching the show, so he sleep there. And they tricked him. One day, I got a new car, and Dickie and Don are like, hey, we want to check out the car. Give us the keys. So I give him the keys. I'm like, I'll be down in five minutes. They go down, and they say to Guillermo, like, hey, come sit in Jimmy's new car. Check it out. He doesn't know I'm coming down. I come down, there's this guy security guard that I've never seen because he's from the other lot sitting in my car. What's going on? And he looks terrified, you know? And I look at him, and, like, he's terrified. And I was like, there's something funny happening here. I don't know what. And they're dying laughing because, you know, they've done this. And I had a bit that. That we were going to do on the show, or Michael Jackson's chef was selling a cookbook. He was. He'd written a cookbook, and he was a Latino guy. And we're going to do bit. And I said, well, let's get that security guard to play the chef. And it was a live bit. And Guillermo comes on the air, and he is so terrified because he's obviously never been on television before. He's white as a sheet, and he's just terrified, and everybody's dying laughing. The name of the book was the way you make my meals, you know, after the Michael Jackson the way you make me feel. And he's trying to deliver his lines, and it's. I remember thinking. I remember this so vividly, thinking during the bit, this guy's gonna be on a lot. Like, this is the first time we've seen this guy. He's gonna be on the show all the time. And now it's, you know, 23 years later, and he's on the show every year.
Ted Danson
Boy, his life changed. It did?
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah.
Ted Danson
Hugely, rightfully so.
Jimmy Kimmel
It did.
Ted Danson
I watched a bit on YouTube this afternoon of him going down that plastic, clear plastic slide on the 80th or 90th floor.
Jimmy Kimmel
He's very afraid of heights, and every once in a while, we have him confront his fears.
Ted Danson
Yes, but he was very funny.
Jimmy Kimmel
You know, it's funny with him. Because we do have him confront his fears sometimes. And they say once you confront your fears and you know you're not afraid, he's still just as afraid, maybe even more now. He doesn't like snakes. He doesn't like heights. He doesn't like. Once we put him on a diving board on the show Wipeout, they had like, a diving board is 25ft in the air or something. He climbs reluctantly. Hours it took for them to convince him to get up there. He climbs up, he goes out on the diving board. He lays down on the diving board, and he's like, I can't move. And hours go by. We're like, jump off the board. He will not move. He won't climb down. He's just laying on his diving board. It was insane. But he's great. He's really, like, become one of my best friends.
Ted Danson
You know, what's cool is to hear about your family and how much clearly, they meant you and you to them and all of that. I think that's what you create, too, on your show. I think that's one of the things that comes across, is you are family. You appreciate family. You understand. You literally have it.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah.
Ted Danson
Visually for all of us to see.
Jimmy Kimmel
I have a. I have a great family.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
They always say this show's like a family owner. Our show is. Yes, literally a family. And, like, when my Uncle Frank died, there were so many stories about how involved he was in almost everyone at our show's lives. I mean, like, he knew everything about them, and it was crazy. And, like, I didn't even realize it until we spent, like, four hours eulogizing him, how involved he was. And because he was just there every day and he, like, cared about people, and PAS would drive him home, and he was just like, just such a character. Like, he. He went to. We went. We all went to a wedding of one of our writer's assistants at the time. And it was downtown la. And Uncle Frank was excited because he was going to take the train. And he was always on time, always more than on time, hours early. I mean, just like. And he wanted to take the train downtown to go to this wedding. So he takes the train and he tells me the story. Because I drove there and he tells me the story. He says, I'm on the train, and he sees this man in a wheelchair. And the guy's in a wheelchair and he's sitting on the train with a cup. My Uncle Frank gets out $10, and he walks over to him and he puts the money in the Guy's cup. And the guy looks up at him, goes, that's my coffee. Guy was not homeless. He was just in the wheelchair. Oh, I'm sorry. Buy yourself a new coffee at the end of the week. My uncle Frank, every at the beginning of the week, he would take $200 out of the ATM to exactly $200 at the end of the week. He wanted to have no dollars in his wallet and start over with a fresh $200. And so whatever he had left, which was often, you know, $147, he would just give out to people. He would just give to people on the street, people at the show, you know, low paid workers, you know, whatever, just hand out money.
Ted Danson
Kind of an angel. Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
Really a character.
Ted Danson
Who's left in your. I hate to put it that way.
Jimmy Kimmel
Oh, my aunt Chippy is one of the funniest people in the world. My cousin Sal works on the show, my brother, my cousin Mickey, my aunt Chippy, who is an unbelievable character and we pull pranks on her. I've been doing stuff to her since I was a little boy. Really? Like, really since I was loading her cigarettes, putting little explosives in her cigarettes when I was like 12, you know, and. And it continues now. I have like budgets to really do. I don't know, maybe you've seen, but it's a pretty popular prank, something I've been. I worked on for years. I. I got a Waymo and I had a actor playing the driver. You know those cars, driverless cars, pick her up at the airport. Now she doesn't know about a driverless car, you know, So I have the driver come, he opens her door, he gets her in the car. He says, will you excuse me? I have to go use the restroom. She's like, yeah, go ahead, you know, whatever. Closes the door. And off goes the car with no driver. And she goes, why? She is going, just absolutely, for sure. Cameras mountain everywhere, customer service reps, you know, coming over the speaker. She's just screaming and just doesn't know what is going on. And that to me is when I'm at my happiest. It really is. It's my happiest.
Ted Danson
Does it take time for her to forgive you or.
Jimmy Kimmel
No, she. You know what? We're in a perpetual. She will never forgive me for all this stuff, but she loves me. That's what's most important.
Ted Danson
That's so cool.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, I love doing stuff there. Once we did, we had. When her daughter and my cousin Mickey was pregnant. She'd never seen a sonogram before because Mickey was the first of her daughters to have a baby and she just never seen it. And so Mickey said, do you want to come see my sonogram? She's like, yeah, I'd love to. You know, whatever. She's not seeing this technology. She doesn't know anything about technology, you know. So we made, we had a whole fake, we set up a whole fake sonogram thing. We had a monitor with like videos in there. And like she was looking at this fetus and she's, you know, tearing. And then the fetus starts doing jumping jacks. And then the fetus starts doing karate and giving her the middle finger and she's just like, she's going nuts. Then the fetus is me.
Ted Danson
Yeah.
Jimmy Kimmel
We do a lot of fun stuff with her. Yeah.
Ted Danson
Can I ask you how Billy is?
Jimmy Kimmel
Billy's great. Thank you for asking. My son Billy is eight years old now. He's had three open heart surgeries and one arthroscopic surgery. We don't think he'll need any more surgeries, which is great. And he's just one of the funniest, weirdest little people. I mean, he's just like nonstop. I know everyone thinks their kids are funny, but like, I go to school and everybody's like, this kid is really funny, you know, my dad, who's seen a lot of like, you know, grandkids and whatever, he goes, this one's the weirdest one. And I'm a grandfather now. I have a three month old granddaughter from my oldest daughter. Yeah. Had a baby, which she told us she was not gonna have any kids. She's not interested in having kids. And I was disappointed, but like, okay, well, you know, that's your decision. And she came over with one of those little printouts of a fetus and it took me like a good four minutes to, you know, to digest it and to figure out what was going on. So now Billy is an eight year old uncle. Uncle Billy. Well, he likes to be called Uncle Bill. Uncle Bill wants to be called Uncle Bill. Every. In every other scenario, he's Billy. As far as his uncleship, he is Bill. That's great. We don't know why, but it's funny.
Ted Danson
And how old is your grand granddaughter is.
Jimmy Kimmel
Her name's Patty and she's three months old. Isn't it super cute and. Yeah, very exciting. Yeah. I have an 11 year old daughter, Jane, who's funny and my, my son Kevin, who's. Who will be 32 any day now. And he's great. We have I have great kids. I'm lucky. Yeah.
Ted Danson
And they're. And the older ones adore the younger ones.
Jimmy Kimmel
They do. And vice versa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. It's like something. I didn't think about it that, you know, I didn't think about that part of it, but it's really. Yeah, it's very special.
Ted Danson
We went on a trip just recently. Just got back. There were nine of us, just kids. Their mates and four grandkids flew to go see Charlie McDowell and his wife Lily, who were in Paris because she's shooting Emily in Paris and Nice. And it was. There were like 11 of us. The table.
Jimmy Kimmel
We're about to take a trip like that. 17 of us. Oh, we're going to Ireland for my dad's 80th birthday. All going to spend time with our Irish family, my dad's family, who he tracked down on Ancestry.com and got in touch with and now has become very close with it. Every weekend he's got. We have Irish cousins visiting la. It's like every weekend someone is at their house visiting, and they just get such a kick out of it. And they live on, like, the land that our family lived on in the 1700s.
Ted Danson
Oh, wow.
Jimmy Kimmel
Crazy.
Ted Danson
Oh, wow. That's amazing.
Jimmy Kimmel
I've never been there, so I'm excited.
Ted Danson
Did you. Did you trace back with Skip Gates back to that family?
Jimmy Kimmel
Oh, yes. Yes, he did.
Ted Danson
You should take that with you so they can see it.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah, well, I've shared it all with them already. Yeah. Yeah.
Ted Danson
They're.
Jimmy Kimmel
We're. Yeah, we're. We've. You know, it's. It's. The Internet has changed that, you know, it's like you really can have just. You can be in close contact with people who live 5,000 miles away.
Ted Danson
Amazing.
Jimmy Kimmel
Yeah.
Ted Danson
I'm so grateful for you to come and talk to me. You're so sweet to be here after a full day's work.
Jimmy Kimmel
I think I actually asked you if I could be on the show. Right.
Ted Danson
They didn't tell me that. Well, I told you they like me to be scared and nervous.
Jimmy Kimmel
I asked you. When I said I didn't ask. I offered myself up. And then it was a long time. I was like, oh, maybe he doesn't want me on the show. So I was grateful when.
Ted Danson
I just can't fathom.
Jimmy Kimmel
I don't know you that well personally, but I'm a great admirer of yours. Not just your work as an actor, but you as a human being, you see. And Mary, you guys seem to be great people and everyone I know that knows you confirms that enthusiastically. Including my friends John and Emily. John and Emily, my former across the street neighbors. John and Emily. Yeah.
Ted Danson
Who I adore as well. This seems like a good note to go on. Okay.
Jimmy Kimmel
You know.
Ted Danson
All right.
Jimmy Kimmel
Why not?
Ted Danson
Thank you.
Jimmy Kimmel
Thank you.
Ted Danson
Please, please, please pass on our respect to your wife.
Jimmy Kimmel
I will do that. She'll be very happy to hear it for real. Hopefully I won't forget it on my 11 minute drive home.
Ted Danson
I'll call her.
Jimmy Kimmel
Okay.
Ted Danson
Huge thanks to Jimmy Kimmel for making time for us. You can catch him on Jimmy Kimmel Live weeknights on ABC at 11:35pm Eastern Standard Time. I hope we can count on that for years to come. That's all for our show this week. Special thanks to our friends at Team Coco. If you enjoyed this episode, send it to someone you love, subscribe on your favorite podcast app and maybe give us a great rating and review on Apple Podcasts if you're of a mind. If you like watching your podcasts, all our full length episodes are on YouTube. Visit YouTube.comteamcoco See you next time. Where Everybody Knows your You've been listening.
Jimmy Kimmel
To Where Everybody Knows yous Name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson Sometimes. The show is produced by me, Nick Liao. Our executive producers are Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and myself. Sarah Fedorovich is our supervising producer. Engineering and mixing by Joanna Samuel with support from Eduardo Perez, research by Alyssa Grohl, talent booking by Paula Davis and Gina Bautista. Our theme music is by Woody Harrelson, Antony Yen, Mary Steenbergen and John Osborne.
Ted Danson
Hi, I'm Roman Mars, host of 99% Invisible. It's a podcast about all the thought that goes into things most people don't have even think about. You're going to see stories everywhere. Follow and listen to 99% invisible wherever you get your podcasts.
Jimmy Kimmel
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Episode: Jimmy Kimmel
Date: October 22, 2025
Host(s): Ted Danson (Woody Harrelson not present in this episode)
Guest: Jimmy Kimmel
This episode features an in-depth, wide-ranging conversation between Ted Danson and late-night host Jimmy Kimmel, recorded a few days before Kimmel was briefly suspended from his show for outspoken political remarks (a topic both reflect on during the episode). The conversation navigates Kimmel’s personal life, family, comedic roots, the risks and responsibilities of being a public voice, behind-the-scenes stories from late-night TV, and the deep bonds of friendship, work, and community. The tone is comedic but heartfelt, moving seamlessly from laughs to vulnerability.
Kimmel’s Perspective on Outspokenness:
Ted’s Intro Contextualizes the Episode:
Kimmel’s Love of Cooking:
Danson’s Take:
Kimmel on Ted’s Dramatic Role:
Danson’s Process and Motivation:
Regimented Routine:
Family at Work:
On Comedy Roasts:
On Community and Friendship:
Danson Praises Kimmel's Courage:
Kimmel Pushes Back:
On Immigration:
Early Influences and Radio:
Transition to TV:
Uncle Frank & Guillermo:
Workplace as Family:
Billy’s Health & Family Expansion:
Danson & Family Traditions:
Authenticity & Courage:
Power of Community and Family:
Impact Beyond Entertainment:
Joy and Silliness:
Deeply human and often moving, the episode offers a rare, behind-the-curtain view of two major public figures simply being themselves—flawed, earnest, and very funny. For Kimmel fans, late-night devotees, and those interested in the intersection of comedy, conscience, and community, this conversation is rich and revealing.