Do Squirrels make good pets?

Summary

Who Smarted? — “Do Squirrels Make Good Pets?”

Date: March 30, 2026
Podcast: Who Smarted? (Atomic Entertainment / Starglow Media)
Host: Adam Tex Davis (Narrator), Jerry Colbert, with characters Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn) and Ratso the Rat (Mike “Ratzo” Privetti)

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Episode Overview

In this lively and humor-filled episode, Who Smarted? explores a kid-favorite question: Do squirrels make good pets? Packed with fast-paced banter, animal trivia, and a clever game show, the episode investigates the similarities and differences between squirrels and rats, common misconceptions about both, their role in the ecosystem, and why feeding or keeping squirrels as pets might not be such a smart idea after all.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Squirrels vs. Rats — Just Fuzzy-Tailed Cousins?

• Setting the Scene: The narrator tries to relax in a park with pizza, only to be approached by Cecily the Squirrel hoping for a snack. Ratso the Rat interrupts, teasing Cecily and pointing out their similarities.
• Initial Question: Are squirrels just rats with bushy tails? The hosts use this playful rivalry to set up their animal comparison.

2. Rodent Relatives — Same Order, Different Families

• Key Fact:
  • Rodents include both rats and squirrels, but they’re in different scientific families despite being in the same order.
• Quote:
  • “While both rats and squirrels are rodents, that means they belong to the same scientific order, not family. Evolutionarily speaking, their families split tens of millions of years ago.” (Narrator, 05:10)

3. “Rat vs. Squirrel” Game Show

• Format: The narrator quizzes Cecily and Ratso (and listeners) on differences and similarities.
• Major Questions/Answers:

  • Size: Squirrels are typically larger. (06:32)

  • Activity Time: Squirrels are active during the day; rats are nocturnal. (06:45)

  • Diet:

    • Rats eat anything, often raid garbage, are known for carrying food away (like the viral pizza rat).
    • Squirrels prefer nuts, seeds, fruits, and insects, often burying food for winter.
    • “Our sense of smell is so good, we can find snacks under a foot of snow. ... Some of our stored nuts end up growing into big, beautiful trees.” (Cecily, 07:31)

  • Teeth: Both have continuously growing incisor teeth. (08:24)

  • Self-Cleaning: Both groom themselves often; “Rats actually aren't that dirty—in fact, they clean themselves more thoroughly than cats do.” (Narrator, 09:01)

  • Disease-Carrying: Both can carry and spread diseases; not just rats. Squirrels can carry Lyme disease, and rats are famous for their alleged connection to the bubonic plague.

    • “Both. While rats are better known disease spreaders, squirrels can carry some dangerous illnesses, like Lyme disease.” (Narrator, 09:49)

  • Speed: Squirrels win—they can run up to 20 mph and make impressive jumps. (10:30)

  • Pestiness:

    • Rats: Damage inside houses, chew groceries and wires.
    • Squirrels: Damage roofs, yards, and even cause power outages (10–20% of them!). (11:01)

4. Should You Feed Squirrels? Make Them Pets?

• Key Advice:

  • “One thing you definitely shouldn’t do is touch them. Of course, the same goes for any wild animal.” (Narrator, 03:32)
  • “Many wildlife experts say you shouldn't feed squirrels. That's because:
    • You'll attract more animals (and potential disease)
    • Human food is bad for squirrels
    • They can become dependent on handouts
    • They might lose their fear of humans and get aggressive
      ...Actually, all of the above.” (Narrator, 12:28)

• Humorous but Cautionary Ending:

  • Cecily disappointed she can’t have pizza; the narrator’s pizza gets stolen by Ratso the Rat, reinforcing the lesson about food, wildlife, and city critters.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Are squirrels just rats with fuzzy tails or are they something else? What makes them such good climbers? And is it a good idea to feed them?” (Narrator, 02:46)
• “Our sense of smell is so good, we can find snacks under a foot of snow. ... Some of our stored nuts like acorns end up growing into big, beautiful trees, which are great for the environment.” (Cecily, 07:31)
• “While squirrels are known to be some of the cleanest rodents, rats actually aren't that dirty in fact, they clean themselves more thoroughly than cats do.” (Narrator, 09:01)
• “Squirrels can scamper over twice as fast [as rats], reaching speeds of up to 20 miles per hour. Squirrels are also great jumpers.” (Narrator, 10:30)
• “Squirrels cause a lot of damage, too... They even gnaw on power lines, causing 10 to 20% of all power outages!” (Narrator, 11:01)
• “Sorry, squirrel. It’s actually all of the above.” [On why you shouldn’t feed squirrels] (Narrator, 12:28)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:47 — First encounter between narrator and Cecily the Squirrel
• 02:20 — Ratso the Rat makes his appearance
• 03:32 — Why people like squirrels more than rats
• 05:00–05:10 — Are they related? Explanation of rodent order vs. family
• 06:02–11:35 — “Rat vs. Squirrel” Game Show (differences, trivia, pestiness)
• 12:00–12:32 — Should you feed squirrels? Multiple choice and full explanation
• 12:54 — Classic pizza rat scene and humorous New York send-off

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Tone & Style

• Fast-paced, funny, clearly aimed at keeping kids engaged
• Features zany character voices and city-centric humor
• Encourages critical thinking with interactive “game show” and quiz elements
• Blends science and social advice with playful banter

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Takeaways

• Squirrels and rats are both rodents but come from different families.
• They have key differences (habitat, diet, behavior) but also many similarities (teeth, intelligence, even cleanliness).
• Feeding squirrels or keeping them as pets isn’t smart—for their health, your safety, and broader ecological reasons.
• Squirrels, while cute, can do real damage and shouldn't be tamed, touched, or fed by people.
• Learning is way more fun when it’s a little goofy—and a lot smart!

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For Listeners

If you or your kids ever wondered, “What’s the real difference between squirrels and rats?” or “Is it OK to feed that squirrel in the park?”—you’ll find answers, laughs, and probably crave pizza just like the city’s rodents by the end of this episode.

Transcript

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

And now it's time for who's Smarted?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Psst.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Hey there, smarty pants. We here at Whosmarted spend a lot of time working in the big city. It's an exciting and fun place to be.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

Hey yo, get out of the road. Go narrate somewheres else.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Sorry. Between all the cars, trucks, buses, delivery guys on scooters, construction, emergency vehicles and you get it. The city can be a little noisy and overcrowded. Which is why I like to grab a slice of pizza for lunch and head on over to the park. Ah, much better. I'm just gonna find a park bench away from the people and enjoy the peace and tranquility.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Hi there.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Uh, hi.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

What you got there?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Nothing much. Just a little lunch.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Ooh, looks like you got yourself a big old slice of pizza.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Maybe.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Are you gonna eat all that crust? Maybe you'd like to share some of it with your cute little new best friend.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

And who would that be?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Me.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

I'm sorry, I didn't realize we were friends.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Are you kidding? I'm a squirrel. I'm everybody's friend. The name's Cecily. What you got for me?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

I really don't think I should be feeding squirrels.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Oh, a little pizza crust won't hurt. Come on, what you say? Everybody loves feeding the squirrels.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Oh yeah? Tell them what you really are.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Huh? Who is that?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Oh, that. No one important. So about that pizza crust.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

I'm telling ya, she ain't who you think she is.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Smarty pants. That strange voice is coming from an overflowing garbage can at the end of the path. What do you suppose is speaking to us?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

I'm telling you, don't worry about him.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Why? Cause I remind you of me. You and me, we's a lot of like you see.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

What?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Don't be silly.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Oh, now I see where that other voice is coming from. Smarty pants. Did you guess? It's similar in size to a squirrel. But it's not a squirrel. Why, it's a rat.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

That's right. The name's Ratso and I'm a rat. But guess what? So is she.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Hey, I'm not a rat, I'm a squirrel.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Yeah, keep telling yourself that. But as far as I'm concerned, you're nothing but a beady eyed, tree huggin, not hoarding, fuzzy tailed rat.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

You take that back.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

I will not. Narrator. What do you say?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

I say you're not very nice rat. But you might have a point, smarty pants. What do you think? Are squirrels just rats with fuzzy tails or are they something Else, what makes them such good climbers? And is it a good idea to feed them?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Of course it is.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

We'll see. It's time for another whiff of science and history.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

On who smarted, who's smart, who's smart? Is it you? Is it me? Is it science or history? Listen up, everyone. We make smarting lots of fun. On who's smart and

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

smarty pants. Whenever you're sitting in a park or walking through the woods, there's certain animals that you get used to seeing. Birds, chipmunks. And, of course, squirrels. Perhaps you'd like to watch them. Or maybe you want to feed them. And we'll get to whether that's a good idea later. But one thing you definitely shouldn't do is touch them. Of course, the same goes for any wild animal. But if you're like most people, you kind of enjoy having squirrels around. They're cute, they're playful. They seem like harmless friends. But what? If you see a rat? Look out, it's a rat. Run. So why do most people find squirrels adorable and rats repulsive?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

It ain't tough to figure out, Trusty. We looks the same. Cept for our tails. Squirrels have cute, big, bushy tails, while my tail looks like an ugly whip.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Hold on. We're a lot more different than that. For one thing, you don't have people skills.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Huh?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Like begging for scraps? I ain't down with that. I know where to find the goods on my own. You would, too, if you acted like your family.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

I?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

My family?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

That's right. Your mother was a rat, your father was a rat, and so are you. Face it, that fuzzy tail ain't fooling nobody. So let's get to the sewers where you belong.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Hold on, hold on. Let's get to the bottom of this, smarty pants. True or false? Rats and squirrels are part of the same family.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

I say true, I say false. But only because I really want it to be false. What is it?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

The answer is false.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Phew.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

While both rats and squirrels are rodents, that means they belong to the same scientific order, not family. Evolutionarily speaking, their families split tens of millions of years ago. So they're related, but more like cousins, not brothers and sisters.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Ha. I knew it.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Order, family, same difference. Bunch of sciencey gobbledygook. Face it, squirrel. You're a rodent just like a rat. Besides the bushy tail, we ain't much different.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Um, is that true, trusty smartypants? Do you think squirrels are much different than rats? I say it's time we Game show this Thing. Hello, everyone.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

It's time for your new favorite game show, Rat versus Squirrel. Please welcome your host, the trusty narrator.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Thank you, thank you. Here's how to play this game, smarty pants. I'll either ask a question or make a statement, and you shout out squirrel, rat, or both. But answer quickly because the rat and squirrel will be buzzing in with answers too. Okay, ready? Let's go. First question. Which are typically larger adult squirrels or rats?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Rats.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Nope. Squirrels tend to be a bit larger. Next. Which animal is active during the day?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

That's easy. Squirrels.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Correct. Rats are nocturnal, meaning they're active at night. Rats often surprise people in the dark. Just one reason why they're not particularly well liked.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

I can't help it if people are such scaredy cats.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Next. This rodent usually eats whatever it can find. Meats, cereals, fruits, you name it. It might even raid your garbage or kitchen.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

That would be rats. We'll go anywhere for a good meal.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

That's right. It's another reason why rats don't get much love. They're often found digging in the trash. While squirrels also eat a variety of foods, they tend to get their meals from wooded areas and parks. Their favorite foods are nuts, fru seeds and insects.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

And to prepare for winter, we bury food to dig up later. Our sense of smell is so good, we can find snacks under a foot of snow. But we don't dig up all the food we bury. And because of that, some of our stored nuts, like acorns, end up growing into big, beautiful trees, which are great for the environment.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Big whoop.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Rats hide our food too. You remember seeing that subway rat carrying away an entire pizza slice? I mean, who needs nuts and berries when you can have pepperoni? And you ain't gonna have trouble finding that in the winter.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Personally, I can't begrudge any animal that likes pizza. Okay, next question. Which animal has top and bottom teeth that never stop growing?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Um, both of us.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Correct. All rodents like rats, squirrels, chipmunks, and mice have teeth that grow throughout their lifetimes. That's how the teeth stay sharp, even with gnawing. These creatures do. In fact, the word rodent comes from a Latin word meaning to gnaw.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

I knew that.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Who doesn't?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

And both squirrels and rats are known to be pretty smart too. Okay, next question. Which animal often cleans itself?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Squirrels, of course. Rats are filthy.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Ooh. The answer is actually both.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Haha. Take that, squirrel.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

While squirrels are known to be some of the cleanest rodents, rats actually aren't that dirty in Fact, they clean themselves more thoroughly than cats do.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

I am not a fan of cats.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Me neither. And dogs aren't any better.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

That's because cats and dogs chase both of you. Next question. Which rodent can carry and spread disease?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Rats?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Squirrels.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

The answer is coming up right after this quick break. Now back to who smarted? Okay, the question was, which animal can carry and spread disease?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Rats?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Squirrels.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

I'm sorry, but the answer is both. Both. While rats are better known disease spreaders, squirrels can carry some dangerous illnesses, like Lyme disease. Historically, rats have been blamed for the deadliest pandemic ever, the bubonic plague that killed about 25 million people in Europe during the 1300s.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Yeah, but now some scientists believe the humans spread that plague, not rats. So quit pointing your fingers at us people and take a look in the mirror, smarty pants.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Which rodent is faster?

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Rats?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Squirrels.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Yep, it's squirrels. While rats average good speed, squirrels can scamper over twice as fast, reaching speeds of up to 20 miles or 32 kilometers per hour. Squirrels are also great jumpers. Their padded feet help them jump from up to 20ft or 6 meters. Now, here's the final question. Which rodent is a bigger pest?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Come on, it's gotta be rats.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

I'm gonna agree. You shouldn't mess with us.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Actually, it's hard to say. Rats tend to do damage inside, building nests in walls, eating through groceries, and chewing anything they can find. But squirrels cause a lot of damage, too. Usually outside. They dig holes in yards, chew through roof shingles and siding, and even gnaw on power lines, causing 10 to 20% of all power outages. So, technically, you both make a lot of trouble. And that concludes another episode of Rat vs. Squirrel. How'd you do, smarty pants? Great.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Say, narrator, you're still gonna share your lunch with me, right?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

That's not a good idea.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

What?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Why not, smarty pants? Even though squirrels have a bit in common with rats, they're also very different in many ways.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

See?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

I told you our tails aren't the only difference.

[Ratso (Mike Ratzo Privetti)]

Whatever. He's still not gonna share his pizza crust with you.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Is that true, trusty narrator?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Yep.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Aww. Why not?

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Smartypants, can you guess why many wildlife experts say you shouldn't feed squirrels? Is it, A, you'll attract more animals and potential disease? B, human food is bad for squirrels, or C, squirrels might become dependent on handouts and stop hunting for food. Or D, squirrels might fear humans less and turn more aggressive, attacking with their sharp teeth?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Uh, none of the above.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Sorry, squirrel. It's Actually, all of the above.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Whoa.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

And I get the feeling you're starting to become dependent on people like me. Maybe you should stop begging for my lunch and go look for food in that tree instead.

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Fine. Catch you next time, trusty.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Ah, now I can enjoy my pizza in peace. Hey, where'd my pizza go?

[Cecily the Squirrel (Charlotte Cohn)]

Hey, look.

[Narrator/Host (Jerry Colbert)]

That rat's got an entire slice of pizza in its mouth. It's headed to the subway. Welcome to New York.

[Narrator (Adam Tex Davis)]

Oh, rats. A squirrely shout out to Ellie in Calgary, Alberta. You told us you love learning new things and want everyone to know that who's Smarted is never boring. You're absolutely right. Boring is bad. Laughing and learning is awesome. Thanks, Ellie. This episode Squirrels was written by Dave Bushy Tailed Beaudry and voiced by Squirrely Charlotte Cohn, Mike Ratzo Privetti, Adam Acorns Davis and Jerry Colber. Technical direction and sound design by Jumpin Josh Hahn. Who's Smarted is recorded and mixed at the Relic Room studios. Our associate producer is Max Pizza Crust Kamaski. The theme song is by Brian Flying Squirrel Suarez with lyrics written and performed by Ash Adam Tex Davis. Who's Smarted was created and produced by Adam Tex Davis and Jerry Colbert. This has been an Atomic Entertainment production.