The light and dark of Ted Danson (encore)

Summary

Wild Card with Rachel Martin: The Light and Dark of Ted Danson (Encore) Release Date: January 16, 2025

Overview

In this encore episode of Wild Card with Rachel Martin, host Rachel Martin engages in a profound and revealing conversation with acclaimed actor Ted Danson. Breaking away from traditional interview formats, the episode employs a unique card-based game to explore Ted's memories, insights, and beliefs. This in-depth discussion delves into Ted's personal experiences, his approach to life and death, his professional journey, and the intricate balance between his public persona and private self.

---

Introduction

Rachel Martin opens the episode by highlighting Ted Danson's recent achievements, including his new Netflix show A Man on the Inside and a Lifetime Achievement Award at the Golden Globes. She commends his versatility not only as an actor but also as a successful podcast host. Ted joins the conversation with enthusiasm, setting the stage for an intimate and engaging dialogue.

[00:57] Ted Danson: "I had so much fun doing a classic spy that halfway through it, I went, oh, don't die. And then I go, wait a minute. What you're really saying is you are so happy to be doing what you're doing, having so much fun. Don't take it away from me. Life."

---

Part 1: Memories

1. Teenage Rebellions

Rachel initiates the first round by exploring Ted's formative years. When asked about his teenage rebellions, Ted reminisces about his rebellious streak involving smoking cigarettes, despite strict "No Smoking" signs near his father's museum.

[06:35] Ted Danson: "I guess that's where Bella. Yeah, even then."

He reflects on how these acts were his early form of resistance and self-expression, hinting at his later environmental and conservationist passions.

2. Choosing Different Paths

The conversation shifts to pivotal moments where Ted could have chosen a different path. He recounts his deep involvement in basketball during his time at Kent School for Boys, emphasizing the life lessons learned from his coach, Jim Wood.

[09:17] Ted Danson: "My coach taught me the joy of team, that it's not about you, it's about the team. And it's very much so in acting."

Ted draws parallels between team sports and acting, highlighting his preference for ensemble work over solo endeavors.

---

Part 2: Insights

1. Decisions and Regrets

Rachel poses a thought-provoking question about regrets and do-overs. Ted candidly shares his lack of desire to redo past decisions, acknowledging his mistakes and the growth that followed.

[12:37] Ted Danson: "If I did something differently and I took a different path, I wouldn't be with my wife, Mary Steenburge."

He emphasizes the importance of embracing one's journey, flaws included, as integral to personal development.

2. Longing and Contentment

The discussion delves into the concept of longing. Rachel expresses her desire to "stop longing" for external validation and to find contentment within herself. Ted offers a counter-perspective, advocating for gratitude over fear.

[17:24] Ted Danson: "This very second is your life. Do you really want to be worrying... Or not grateful for this moment?"

He suggests that focusing on gratitude can shift one's mindset from fear to joy, enhancing overall well-being.

---

Part 3: Beliefs

1. Shifting Bedrock Truths

Rachel explores whether Ted has ever discovered that a fundamental belief in his life was untrue. Ted reflects on his spiritual journey and the profound impact of his mother's passing.

[23:28] Ted Danson: "I do not know, and I became happy with not knowing. And I'll find out in due time."

This revelation marks a transition from seeking absolute truths to embracing uncertainty and living authentically.

2. Sacred Places and Relationships

When asked about sacred places, Ted poignantly identifies his life with his wife, Mary Steenburge, as sacred. He narrates a deeply personal memory of a canoe ride that solidified his love and commitment to Mary.

[31:48] Ted Danson: "That canoe ride was... magical. It changed my life. Our lives."

This story underscores the sanctity he places on his relationship and the profound impact of shared experiences.

---

Prize and Conclusion

As the game concludes, Ted is awarded a symbolic prize: the opportunity to revisit a cherished moment from his past. He chooses the aforementioned canoe ride with Mary in Mendocino, a moment that epitomizes their deep connection and mutual growth.

[33:37] Ted Danson: "It was one of those magical days. It was a tidal river... Mary kept wanting to go around the next bend... that canoe ride was... our lives."

Rachel and Ted share heartfelt final remarks, emphasizing the therapeutic and uplifting nature of their conversation.

---

Closing Remarks

Rachel Martin wraps up the episode by acknowledging the depth and warmth of her conversation with Ted Danson. The episode not only sheds light on Ted's multifaceted personality but also offers listeners valuable insights into embracing life's complexities with gratitude and authenticity.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Ted Danson on Life and Death:

  "This very second is your life. Do you really want to be worrying or angry or sad or not grateful for this moment?"
  (00:57)

• Ted on Love and Relationships:

  "Mary was in the front seat with a straw hat on... It was one of those magical days."
  (33:37)

• Rachel on Personal Growth:

  "I long to stop longing... to just be okay with where I am."
  (17:02)

Final Thought:
This episode stands out as a testament to Ted Danson's introspective nature and Rachel Martin's skillful hosting, offering listeners a nuanced exploration of life's light and dark facets.

Transcript

[Rachel Martin]

Support for this podcast and the following message come from Dignity Memorial. When your celebration of life is prepaid today, your family is protected. Tomorrow, planning ahead is truly one of the best gifts you can give your family. For additional information, visit dignitymemorial.com hey, it's Rachel. We're bringing you a special encore episode this week from one of my very favorite guests. Because it seems like he's everywhere these days. Ted Danson is in a new show called A Man on the Inside on Netflix. The the other week, he got a lifetime achievement award at the Golden Globes. And it turns out he's really good at being a podcast host, too, because the show he launched after we talked to him last summer is a big hit. So, yes, I am riding shotgun on the Ted Danson bandwagon, which means we're putting my conversation with Ted at the top of your feed. Enjoy. How often do you think about death?

[Ted Danson]

Oh, a lot. I had so much fun doing a classic spy that halfway through it, I went, oh, don't die. And then I go, wait a minute. What you're really saying is you are so happy to be doing what you're doing, having so much fun. Don't take it away from me. Life.

[Rachel Martin]

I'm Rachel Martin, and this is Wildcard, the game where cards control the conversation. Each week, my guest chooses questions at random from a deck of cards. Pick a card, one through three questions about the memories, insights, and beliefs that have shaped them.

[Ted Danson]

I will say, teddy, Teddy, this is your life.

[Rachel Martin]

My guest this week is actor Ted Danson.

[Ted Danson]

This very second is your life. You really want to be. Not grateful for this moment? No.

[Rachel Martin]

I started watching the Good Place with my kids. It was sort of born out of my own guilt that I didn't take them to church, honestly. So I decided, at the very least, and I mean the very least, I. To prevent complete moral decay, was to watch a show that sandwiched real ethical questions between jokes about frozen yogurt and the infinite nature of the universe. What really captivated my kids was the idea throughout the show that people are both good and bad. We are both things all the time. Some of us are a little more of one than the other, but you get the point. Ted Danson is one of the best representations of this. He plays Michael, who's a bad guy playing a good guy who actually becomes a good guy who's still a little bit bad. In that lies the real joy of a Ted Danson performance, because you can see this duality in so many of his roles. He's a Happy go. Lucky guy with a quick wit and a quicker smile. And then you start to see the cracks in that sunny demeanor. There's a darkness underneath all that goodness that gives his characters a certain depth. Sam Malone on Cheers. Hank Larson in Fargo. Even when he played a version of himself in Curb youb Enthusiasm, he's all light and fun. And then you see that little twinkle in his eye, that unforgettable smirk, how he literally skips into scenes, and you have to wonder if everything is as it appears. So we're gonna try to find out. Ted Danson, welcome to Wildcard.

[Ted Danson]

I'm very excited to be here, especially after that introduction.

[Rachel Martin]

So yay.

[Ted Danson]

Come on, dark, please, Ted, have some dark, please. Don't be bland. Don't be bland.

[Rachel Martin]

You are never bland, my friend. I will tell you that as a longtime observer of your work. And so I'm super happy that you're here. Thanks for doing this.

[Ted Danson]

My pleasure.

[Rachel Martin]

I actually said that you skip into scenes. I've noticed that you actually do do this a lot in movies.

[Ted Danson]

Is it a skip or a sashay? I can do both equally well.

[Rachel Martin]

And now that you mention it, I feel like it's more sashay. I feel like that's your natural default, is like a sashay. What's up with that?

[Ted Danson]

Well, it's just my feminine side coming out. I just want to make it clear.

[Rachel Martin]

When I walk in a room that you encompass multitudes. Ted Danson, you've got a new podcast out. It's called where everybody knows your name. A nice little shout out to Cheers. So do you like it? Do you enjoy being a podcast host?

[Ted Danson]

I do, which is so odd. I would never have pegged myself as somebody who would really enjoy doing a podcast because I'm the opposite. If I'm not acting or have a script or a function or something. If I'm at a cocktail party, talking is like pulling teeth. I can be kind of surfacy and shallow and cocktail chat. But I tend to be a little more of a wallflower than you would think. And here I am spending half hour, hour, 90 minutes talking to somebody nonstop and finding out who they are. And I find it. I'm scared in the beginning, always. But I find it such a gift. What makes you tick?

[Rachel Martin]

I'm into it, too.

[Ted Danson]

Who made you you? How did that happen? Fascinates me.

[Rachel Martin]

I've got a deck of cards in front of me. Each one has a question on it that I'd love for you to answer.

[Ted Danson]

So you too will be surprised about the question. You don't know what question is. Okay.

[Rachel Martin]

Because. Keep listening, Ted Danson.

[Ted Danson]

Okay, sorry.

[Rachel Martin]

I'm gonna hold up three cards at a time, and then you pick, and there are a couple of rules. You get one skip. So if you use your skip, I'll swap in another question from the deck randomly. You get one flip. You can put me on the spot and ask me to answer one of the questions before you do.

[Ted Danson]

I'm there.

[Rachel Martin]

Good student. Okay, we're going to break it up into three memories, insights and beliefs with a few questions in each round. And because it's a game, there's a prize at the end.

[Ted Danson]

Oh, thank God. Maybe an award or a statue or something.

[Rachel Martin]

It's a golden statue with your name on it. Danson Lifetime Achievement for Life. No, it's not that, but I think you're gonna like it.

[Ted Danson]

Great.

[Rachel Martin]

I can already tell. Okay, so you ready?

[Ted Danson]

I am.

[Rachel Martin]

You said you were. Okay, so here we go. This is round one. Memories. Three cards I'm holding up before you. And you pick 1, 2 or 3.

[Ted Danson]

3.

[Rachel Martin]

3.

[Ted Danson]

Yep.

[Rachel Martin]

What was your form of rebelling as a teenager?

[Ted Danson]

I'm not 100% sure I ever rebelled as a teenager. I brought my parents to their knees when I was 45, but as a teenager, I smoked cigarettes. Yeah, it's rebellious. Yeah. My father's museum had this big, huge hopi bowl full of sand right outside the door and said, no smoking. People would drive up from Phoenix, get out of the car, and we'd watch them from our hiding place, and they would come out, light a cigar or cigarette, walk five feet and go, well, hell, and have to stick it out. They would go inside and we'd scamper up, grab the cigarette before it was put out and run back into the canyon and smoke. I guess that's where Bella.

[Rachel Martin]

See, you were a conservationist. Yeah, even then.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah.

[Rachel Martin]

Right.

[Ted Danson]

See, I'm milquetoast, but I'm telling you, it came later.

[Rachel Martin]

Yeah, but you're. So now I have to go there. I have to go. Even if you were 45. What, you brought your parents to your. To their knees.

[Ted Danson]

Well, I went. I won't be too specific, but I. I didn't really grow up emotionally until I was about 44, and I was a bit of a liar in my relationship. I'll leave it at that. And I started to work on myself very seriously around that time, going to clinics. And I had a mentor, psychologist and a mentor. And I worked very hard to not be that person who hid his emotions and just went out the back door. And so that was all kind of messily in the press, and my parents, poor parents, were going, what? You know, And I finally called them and they were very sweet, and they came to support me and everything, but it was. The press sounded horrible. The work underneath the press was invaluable. And I'm very glad for that time, even though it was, you know, messy. Very messy.

[Rachel Martin]

Thank you for that. We're still in memories. Three new cards. One, two or three?

[Ted Danson]

Middle. Let's go middle.

[Rachel Martin]

Two.

[Ted Danson]

Two. Sorry. Two.

[Rachel Martin]

Yeah. What was a moment in your life when you could have chosen a different path?

[Ted Danson]

Wow. A different path. I suppose there was a while where I so misguidedly thought, ah, basketball, you will be. Yup. At Kent School for Boys, I was on a basketball team, and it meant the world to me. I mean, I was not an academic. And the only thing that got me through this intense private school period was basketball. And my coach, Jim Wood, saved my life. In what way saved my life in that he gave me purpose, he taught me things. He taught me, you know, basketball. And my coach taught me the joy of team, that it's not about you, it's about the team. And it's very much so in acting. This is not about you scoring points as an actor. It's about the play. The play is the thing, and I firmly believe that. And I've gotten the most joy in life out of being part of an ensemble, and not just by myself. You never know if that's choice, that you're not Tom Cruise, like, career, or whether there was just no way you were going to be that. But I love ensemble. I love being part of a group.

[Rachel Martin]

Yeah.

[Ted Danson]

Hey, can I ask you, is this like your lazy version of running a podcast? Because all you have to do is pick up some cards. This is not fair, Ted. Shh. Do not tell people I'm gonna use this. This is good.

[Rachel Martin]

Zip it. Zip it. Ted Danson.

[Ted Danson]

That's funny.

[Rachel Martin]

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[Rachel Martin]

This podcast and the following message come from Dignity Memorial when your celebration of life is prepaid today, your family is protected. Tomorrow, planning ahead is truly one of the best gifts you can give your family. For additional information, visit dignitymemorial.com this message comes from Viking.

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[Rachel Martin]

We'Re into the second round.

[Ted Danson]

All right, give me the title of this round.

[Rachel Martin]

Insights, things you're learning now.

[Ted Danson]

All right.

[Rachel Martin]

Okay.

[Ted Danson]

Yep. Number two.

[Rachel Martin]

New cards. Number two.

[Ted Danson]

Yep.

[Rachel Martin]

If you got a do over for one decision in your life, what would it be?

[Ted Danson]

Oof. I wouldn't. Next question, please.

[Rachel Martin]

You're skipping that one.

[Ted Danson]

No. Oh, no, no. I said I wouldn't.

[Rachel Martin]

You wouldn't?

[Ted Danson]

I wouldn't look for a do over. No, I wouldn't. And there are things that I'm deeply embarrassed about, ashamed about, automatically. Yeah. Because if I did something over, I'm being a little bit tricky here, but if I'm, you know, if I did something differently and I took a different path, I wouldn't be with my wife, Mary Steenburge.

[Rachel Martin]

I know. I get that. But I also think that it is. I think people get hung up on. I have no regrets because if I did anything differently, I wouldn't be who I am today.

[Ted Danson]

All right. But let's.

[Rachel Martin]

There are things I definitely wish I had done differently.

[Ted Danson]

Oh, me too. But that, you know, that's numerous. I probably can look back at this podcast and pick one that I wish I hadn't done. I have cringers. I am, you know, I am horribly embarrassed about many things, and I. It's cringe worthy, you know, but that's my life.

[Rachel Martin]

Were you always so accepting of that, or has that been an evolution for you to look back at your life and those mistakes and embarrassments and errors and say it's okay?

[Ted Danson]

Well, I wish I hadn't become a liar and walked out the back door, you know, early in life, I wish that hadn't been me. But even your wounds, you kind of have fondness for. If you've gone through them and lived through it and. And acknowledged it and made amends and all of that stuff, then you don't want to not have those in your life. Although they're horribly cringe worthy.

[Rachel Martin]

Did your wife Mary have a hard time accepting those wounds, or was that.

[Ted Danson]

No, no, no. I spoke to Mary. I mean, first off, I'M one of those people that obnoxiously vomits their life out on people, you know?

[Rachel Martin]

So, like, on your first date, you just.

[Ted Danson]

Literally. The day I met her, first off, we both realized, individually, we said to ourselves. I said to myself, I'm incapable of being in a marriage, a relationship, because I will mess it up, you know, and it's on me. And she was saying the same thing to herself that, I know I look like I should be good at relationships, but I'm not, you know, we both had come grinding to a halt and also had, in my case, been working on myself to be honest and real.

[Rachel Martin]

And she accepted you for all the things.

[Ted Danson]

So from day one, in essence, I was like a convert, you know, to truth. So I, you know, I had to, you know, layout the drunk on the. Yeah, the drunk on the street knew who I was because I'd stop and tell the drunk on the street who I am. But our life is so empty of secrets, you know, and if there's even a momentary one where, shoot, I didn't exactly tell the truth, it's so devastating that to me, for me, that I immediately grind to a hall and say, I gotta talk to you. You know, so being truthful is such a. It just greases the skids of life, man. Being truthful, our life together doesn't mean we don't deal with hard things. But our life together is very full of laughter and joy. Yep. We're very blessed.

[Rachel Martin]

Thank you.

[Ted Danson]

Yep.

[Rachel Martin]

For that. I also think that's a good lesson for everybody. Okay, this is the last one in the insights round. One, two, three. Three new cards.

[Ted Danson]

Are these three new cards so I don't have to.

[Rachel Martin]

Three new cards every time? They're three new cards, so you're not picking the residuals.

[Ted Danson]

Gotcha. One. I'll take number one.

[Rachel Martin]

Is there anything you long for?

[Ted Danson]

I'm gonna flip it. Just because I'm tired of talking. What do you long for? Ha. Rachel, you're on camera.

[Rachel Martin]

What do I long for? I long to stop longing. I don't mean that to be, like, oh, so meta. But I long to just be okay. I long to just stop.

[Ted Danson]

Okay with yourself looking.

[Rachel Martin]

Yeah. Stop looking for external validation. And stop looking for. To meet other. Other people's definition of success. And. And to just be okay. Just be okay with where I am. And that's.

[Ted Danson]

Well, it's so interesting that you say that because you present the exact opposite. You totally present the exact opposite.

[Rachel Martin]

I mean, thank you. I'll take that as a compliment. But I think all of us struggle with that. Like, you know, it's learning to appreciate things and not look at something and say, if only X would transpire, then I would be happier. And if only Y would happen, then this relationship would be better and then I would be more content and that relationship might never get better. And it's just. It's just I long to stop longing. Yeah.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah. All right. Wow.

[Rachel Martin]

What you got?

[Ted Danson]

Thank you. Yeah, that's very cool. This interview just got really interesting. No, really, thank you. It's. It's good to share stuff with other people. That's cool. That was real. Wouldn't it be funny if I went? Well, I'm going to skip it. You can't.

[Rachel Martin]

When you flip, you can't skip.

[Ted Danson]

Oh, okay. So wait, ask me again.

[Rachel Martin]

What do you long for?

[Ted Danson]

Right. Huh? Longing is kind of a lovely word. It doesn't feel bad, morose, you know, hopeless. It feels. No, it feels wonderfully.

[Rachel Martin]

It's kind of warm.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah.

[Rachel Martin]

I don't know.

[Ted Danson]

Longing. Very little. But let me. I don't want to.

[Rachel Martin]

I think that's a lucky thing.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah, it is. But I will say that being 76 and no matter, and I'm not dooming myself to a certain amount of time left on this earth, but you do, at this age, start to go, oh, you have less years ahead of you than you do behind you. And it's much easier for me to catch myself when I am into longing, meaning I wish that or I'm worried, which all kind of come into that longing for something other than what's going on right this moment. I will say, teddy, Teddy, this is your life. This is your life. This very second is your life. Do you really want to be worrying or angry or sad or not grateful for this moment? No. And it's not to be a goody two shoes, it's to make my body feel better. If you're grateful, all of a sudden, you got joy running through your veins. Feels good. So I think it's good to have these desires and it's good to visualize what that would be like and then behave as if you're already there. Not like an idiot, but dabble in allowing yourself to feel, yes, I have that as opposed to, no, I don't, and I wish I did. And then be joyful and grateful in this moment and behave as if you did have what it is you're longing for.

[Rachel Martin]

I love that.

[Ted Danson]

It's much more.

[Rachel Martin]

Imaginations are powerful, aren't they?

[Ted Danson]

Yeah. Yeah. I do think they manifest. And even if I'M wrong. I feel good, right? You know, I don't think I've answered one of your cards, but I have babbled.

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[Rachel Martin]

We are now into beliefs. Okay, three new cards.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah.

[Rachel Martin]

One. Two, three.

[Ted Danson]

Three.

[Rachel Martin]

Was there a bedrock truth in your life that you found out wasn't true?

[Ted Danson]

Was there a bedrock truth in my life that I discovered wasn't true?

[Rachel Martin]

Right.

[Ted Danson]

Are beliefs, does that mean you think something is absolutely real and true and factual? Is that a belief? Because there's faith? I have faith that there's an afterlife. I have faith in that there is something godlike or supreme like other than just what we see in front of us. I have faith that love can change. I have all these different faiths, but if you call them beliefs then I don't want to defend them. Because beliefs all of a sudden are like belief is so and so believes this because of their religion and now you can't have a conversation or I'm not interested in arguing with somebody over beliefs or put my belief out there with the assumption that I think it's the way to go. No, everybody gets to have their own beliefs and their faiths and all of that.

[Rachel Martin]

Has your faith ever been challenged?

[Ted Danson]

No, not challenged. I do remember watching my. You know, I've read Alan Watts. I've read all my different philosophy books. And my mentor took me years ago when I was in my 40s through all sorts of different spiritual explorations. And I went to church with my mom, who was Episcopal, then converted to Catholic. And I had all of that information. And then I was sitting with my mother while she was dying. She chose to die, Came home because she had pneumonia she couldn't shake and didn't want to go have tubes in hospitals. And she was 88 or 89. My sister and I took different shifts. I did the nighttime, she did the daytime. But I remember sitting there when she had mostly was no longer able to talk to us or, you know, she had been, for all intents and purposes, she was no longer there. Her person, her body was still going. And I remember thinking, oh, I don't know. All my beliefs and faiths and things went flying out the window. And I had this deep realization that I do not know. I think that maybe she knows at this moment, or she's about to know, but I don't know, and it doesn't matter. I became happy with not knowing. And I'm getting back to the good place. Just try to be a little better every day. Try to be more nurturing to those. Try to be more kind. Try to be more understanding and loving and real and all of those things. Just try to do it a little bit better every day, and that'll do. I don't need the big beliefs, you know, because I don't know. And I'll find out in due time.

[Rachel Martin]

Thank you. So now three more.

[Ted Danson]

You do know that I'm being totally guarded and just putting out the kind of glorious part of. Ted.

[Rachel Martin]

What now? You just told me that you realize you just said that out loud.

[Ted Danson]

I know.

[Rachel Martin]

I have to.

[Ted Danson]

No, but it's kind of true. I mean, if I were sitting here with Mary, we would laugh at all of the, you know, at all the.

[Rachel Martin]

Stuff you weren't saying.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah, yeah. And we would poke fun of each other. We delight in each other's foibles because we love each other and we want each other to grow. But we delight in going, wait a minute. You know, not so fast, Mr. Perfect. Mary. Mary keeps me in check. She's glorious and celebrates me nonstop. It's a wonderful thing.

[Rachel Martin]

Oh, we should all be so lucky.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah, we should.

[Rachel Martin]

Yeah. Okay, here we go. Still going.

[Ted Danson]

Yep.

[Rachel Martin]

Three more.

[Ted Danson]

Yep.

[Rachel Martin]

One, two or three?

[Ted Danson]

Three.

[Rachel Martin]

Okay. Oh, well, how often do you think about death?

[Ted Danson]

Oh, a lot. It's usually a version of, I mean, not literal death. But see, I flip my brain. I've trained it and I like it. And it may not be real, but my brain immediately tries to contextualize and spin myself away from fear. I don't like living in fear. And I have tons of it. You know, it comes up. I had so much fun doing a classic spy that I just finished for Netflix that halfway through it I went, I was going, oh, don't die.

[Rachel Martin]

Let me finish this yourself. That's what you were saying.

[Ted Danson]

You know, I have my. Something hurts, you know, oh, does that mean I'm, you know, I'm incapable of finishing this, you know, but. And then I go, wait a minute. What you're really saying is you are so happy to be doing what you're doing. You're so joyful, having so much fun. Don't take it away from me, life. So instead of being fearful, just say, oh, my God, thank you, thank you, thank you for this blessing that I have. Thank you for this job, thank you for whatever. Because then I can live in gratitude, which is more joyful and I don't have to live in fear. I will contextualize my way out of fear as much as I possibly can.

[Rachel Martin]

That's smart.

[Ted Danson]

There are times Covid. Covid was like a brick wall for a while. It was like, damn, I can't spin my way out of this.

[Rachel Martin]

I got no context. I got no context. So I guess I have another question related to this because you did. You have talked publicly about suffering from plaque psoriasis for a long time. And I wonder if that experience made you think differently about your body and your own kind of physical fragility.

[Ted Danson]

Oh, definitely. And I could never look at myself in the mirror. I was born without a chest muscle. I was 6 foot at 13 and weighed 120 pounds. And then when I was 25, I got psoriasis. I was never able to go, you know, oh, what a glorious creature you are in your Speedo. I never had that self affirming reflection in the mirror. So I think it made me, I think self deprecating humor came out of that. My mother also was, you know, was very. She dealt wonderfully with the light things of life. Joy and gratitude and excitement and all of those things when things were dark, which life has. She had trouble with that. So there were things like phrases like pride goeth before a fall. You know, that kind of stuck in my head. And so it's like being prideful, even though I am. It was something that I tried not to be because I didn't want the fall. Even having a conversation with you today where I'm kind of forcing it to be on the higher level of the joy meter because that's what I like to hear back.

[Rachel Martin]

That's where you like to live? Yeah, I do.

[Ted Danson]

That's where I like to live. But I am also very aware that I will step out of here and directly into a pile of karmic poo because that's just the way life. The way life works. Mr. Ted, who thinks he's so wonderful dancing, you know, will get a reflection of the truth. But that's fun. That's funny.

[Rachel Martin]

Last questions.

[Ted Danson]

Yes.

[Rachel Martin]

One, two or three?

[Ted Danson]

Three.

[Rachel Martin]

Last one in beliefs. Three.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah.

[Rachel Martin]

What is a place you consider sacred?

[Ted Danson]

Wow. I don't know why you're bringing tears in my eyes. I don't know. My love for Mary. Sacred? Well, my life with Mary.

[Rachel Martin]

I may meet your hope. That's a beautiful thing that not many people assign that word to a relationship.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah, I'm very blessed. I'm very blessed. Yeah.

[Rachel Martin]

So with that, Ted Danson, you've won the game. With Mary's help.

[Ted Danson]

This has been really fun. I hope you feel better.

[Rachel Martin]

I do feel better. Every time I feel better.

[Ted Danson]

Oh, I didn't mean feel better from playing the game with me. I just meant I know you were.

[Rachel Martin]

Oh, my. Cold.

[Ted Danson]

A little under the weather. Sorry. I hope you feel better being with me.

[Rachel Martin]

I do. Your presence.

[Ted Danson]

Yeah, Send me your presence really lifted my spirit. Karmic pose. Coming my way.

[Rachel Martin]

You made it to the end, so there's a prize. Remember?

[Ted Danson]

Yes.

[Rachel Martin]

Okay. This is the prize. Ted Danson, a trip in our memory time machine.

[Ted Danson]

Okay.

[Rachel Martin]

Okay. So for your prize, you get to revisit one moment from your past. This is a moment you wouldn't change anything about. You would just like to linger there a little longer. What do you choose?

[Ted Danson]

Sorry, I'm editing like mad.

[Rachel Martin]

Oh, I like that one though. Yeah, whatever one made you laugh.

[Ted Danson]

The canoe ride I took with Mary. That by the end of it, without anything necessarily happening other than being together in the canoe ride, I knew I was in love.

[Rachel Martin]

Where were you?

[Ted Danson]

Mendocino. We were shooting a film and we were both knew we were incapable of relationships. So I wasn't. But I thought, well, this will be romantic in the way that it'll be beneficial for the acting in the film. It's old fashioned romantic. We'll go on a picnic in a canoe and up we went. And it was one of those magical days. It was a tidal river and so you had sea otters on their back, you know, cracking oysters or clams or whatever. It was. Blue heron. Mary was in the front seat with a straw hat on. And we just kept going and we paddled in sync. We didn't talk for, you know, minutes without it being self conscious. It was one of those things where, oh, wow, we are so totally in sync. And Mary kept wanting to go around the next bend, you know, and that's kind of. She actually wrote a poem about this moment I'm describing that became our vows. It was part of our wedding vows, but it was also kind of like our life. I'm always the one going, oh, are you sure we should go around this corner? All right, I will do it. I'm with you. I'm behind you paddling, but, oof, this is scary, you know? So that canoe ride was. Was huge. Changed my life. Our life. Our lives.

[Rachel Martin]

Ted Danson. His new podcast is called where everybody knows your name. Ted, thank you so much.

[Ted Danson]

Thank you, Rachel. Have a great day.

[Rachel Martin]

This episode was produced by Lee Hale and edited by Dave Blanchard. It was fact checked by Susie Cummings, Cecile Davis Vasquez and Jane Gilvin. It was mastered by Robert Rodriguez. Wildcard's executive producer is Beth Donovan. Our theme music is by Ramtin Arablouei. You can reach out to [e-mail] we're going to shuffle the deck and be back with more next week. See you then.

[Unknown]

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