Erica (32:12)
That was great. Teaching segment. All right, we're doing our teaching segment. I saw something on LinkedIn the other day called the Charisma Wheel, and I really liked it, so I wanted to share it as part of our teaching segment. So what the Charisma Wheel does, and we'll show it here, is it has, I don't know, about nine things in it, which helps you have presence and helps you connect with other people. And I think regardless of how smart you are, how senior you are, how accomplished you are, how many people report to you, how long you've been in your job, if you can harness your own charisma and create a connection with other people, you can be really successful. I often marvel at work. I saw something on Instagram the other day that's like, the longer you work, do you think the more you think people are idiots? I 100 million percent think that's true. But the other thing that I always come back to is it's always the basic stuff that people miss, which is connection and communication. So the Charisma wheel looks at 10 things. First is using people's names. So if you want to create a sense of presence, if you want to create a sense of connection, remember the person's name. Right? Just say their name, remember their name, use their name. Sounds stupid. It's not. The second is to mirror body language. So I don't know if anybody's seen this, but if someone's meeting with you and they're crossing their legs, if you cross their legs and mirror how that person is facing you and presenting themselves to you, it creates more affinity between you and that person. Ask real questions. So I think one of the things, whether you're interviewing for a job, whether you're advocating for yourself, whether you're trying to make a point, having substantive things to say always matters. Whenever I try to go into a conversation where I have to get something done, I always write it down beforehand. I think anybody who knows me knows that I never say more than three things, but I always try to say the three things in different Ways and in different combinations to make the same point. And I always, always, always try to have the things have substance. And substance is defined by the person and means something a little bit different to everybody. But making sure that you are making value out of a person's time and making sure that when you have something to say, that that. That something is worthwhile is super important. I had a PLL board meeting yesterday, and there's a lot of people talking about this, that, this, that, this, that. And I was like, God, I haven't said one thing in this entire board meeting. And then I was starting to feel like, a little bit badly, like, ooh, am I offering value? And then what I realized is I'm like, no. When I say something, I want it to have purpose and I want it to have substance, and I want it to have meaning. And it's not worth saying something if it doesn't take the conversation further, or if it does, forward the progression of the conversation or the meaning of the meeting overall. Speak more slowly. So slow talking. I struggle with slow talking, but by not rushing through your words, it can help people understand them. And by choosing your words thoughtfully, that can have a huge, huge meaning. So use people's names, mirror their language. Ask real questions. Speak more slowly. Don't fill up the silence. So own your pauses is the next one, which is don't fill the void. Let there be an uncomfortable silence. Let there be a break. Let there be a moment and a gap so that someone else can jump in with what they have to say. I think this is one has taken me a long time to learn, but it always, always, always works, which is, say less. Tell a short story. Be relatable, be meaningful, Create an analogy. Be human in the conversation. Match people's energy. If someone is coming to you, high energy, be high energy. If someone's coming to you in a softer, quiet energy, be thoughtful and soft in your own energy. I'm the least bought into this one. I think you have to have your own energy. I also think sometimes when people come into a conversation really hot or angry or crazy, that you being calm and centered can actually be a better way to have that conversation. But in general, I think charismatic people have energy and charisma and passion, and if you can meet and match that, it will give you more presence with those people. Adjust your posture is the next one. So making sure I saw something else the other day of if you're public speaking, if you're trying to convey a big point like plant your feet and have something to Say, I think dancing around and fidgeting around is distracting. I remember I gave this huge presentation at Yahoo. It was like the first sales conference I'd ever been a part of. And I was nervous. I was very, very, very nervous. And I moved. Like, I kept pacing when I was talking instead of planting. And I remember going to talk to the CEO after, and she just like, blasted me for pacing. And I was like, ah. It made me feel so small and insignificant. But it was a good reminder that if you can plant and hold steady, your words can carry more meaning. Compliment the details. Pay attention to the details and compliment them. Smile genuinely and with warmth. And that's it. So Those are the 10 things. Do with it what you will. All right, strategery. All right, we're back to strategery. We are choosing burnout as our strategery word today. Okay. Okay. We are agreeing that burnout is a maybe an old word, but it's an old word that has taken on new meaning with a vengeance. So burnout in a work context refers to a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion caused by prolonged or excessive stress. It's characterized by feelings of cynicism, detachment, and reduced professional efficacy. Burnout is considered an occupational phenomenon, specifically as a syndrome resulting from chronic workplace stress that hasn't been successfully managed. All right, so my two cents on this is this. What I just described is real. I'm not sure burnout is real if you haven't been in the workforce for more than, I don't know, 10, 12, 24, 36 months. And two, if you've decided as a result of it, you have to take to your bed from that 10, 12, 36, 48 months. So I think burnout is one of those words that's gonna get thrown around a lot, which is really dangerous because one, I do think there are people who are burnt out. I do think there are people who are in workplaces that are chronically stressful. And I do think that that level of stress can have a very negative impact on your psyche and a very negative impact on. I think the problem here is that burnout is going to be Kleenexed. Like, everybody's going to use the word burnout when they've had a rough week or their boss yells at them, or they're hungover on a Thursday. Like, the burnout word kind of becomes a catch all for being dissatisfied and tired, when in reality, it's actually a pretty serious situation. So that's my. My advice would be to not use the burnout word, unless you are, in fact, burnt out. If you are burnt out, you should talk to somebody like a professional or someone in healthcare or a doctor. And I think if you are just feeling unfulfilled, unsatisfied and hi. Oh, you look pretty today. If you're just feeling unfulfilled and unsatisfied or stressed and tired, I think in a lot of ways those things are very solvable. And you either have to solve things within yourself or you've got to solve where you work. Work. All right. So not measuring yourself by an old yardstick, big topic in my head right now. I also, Danielle from our Work Like a Girl Advisory Board, had a great thought today that she shared that she and her partner always share, which she said, if not this, then something better. And I think my parting thoughts today beyond don't measure yourself by somebody else's yardstick or your old yardstick is that if you're in a tough spot and if you're not happy with where you are or you're feeling stuck or overwhelmed or you're in a situation that isn't good, there is always something better. And I think it's good to keep in mind because I think a lot of us default to if this is bad, whatever else is out there has to be worse or it's going to be worse. And the reality is that's most often not true. And that I wrote about this and nobody cares is that most people are optimists and you're going to say it worked out anyway. So I really loved both of those things, which is a constant reminder to be good to yourself and to set new standards and accept where you are and where you want to go. And then the second piece is that if it's not going great or you are struggling or things are hard, that if you don't want to do this, you can go do something better. If this doesn't work out, there's something else out there. So that's it for this episode. We'll see you back here next week. Give us a rating or give us a review. Go to work like a girl. Slack if you haven't. And we have a big event coming up on August 5th with Schoolhouse, which I think is sold out, but we will do another one called At Home at Work and we will see you back here next week.
