Episode Summary: ReThinking: Living each day like it’s your first with Suleika Jaouad
WorkLife with Adam Grant | November 11, 2025
Overview
In this deeply reflective and engaging episode, Adam Grant sits down with writer, memoirist, and cancer survivor Suleika Jaouad. They dive into what it really means to live fully—challenging the often-repeated maxim “live each day as if it’s your last,” and instead proposing the radical, gentler alternative of “living each day as if it’s your first.” Drawing on Suleika's experiences with illness, creativity, and journaling, the conversation explores how to balance ambition and presence, transform adversity into a wellspring for joy, and build authentic connections. The episode is both practical and philosophical, offering listeners inspiration and actionable wisdom for reimagining work, creativity, relationships, and daily living.
Main Discussion Points & Insights
1. Challenging the “Live Each Day as If It’s Your Last” Mindset
(Starts at 04:27)
- Adam and Suleika discuss the problems with this popular life advice:
- Adam: “My first thought is nothing meaningful would ever get accomplished. People would just live in the moment and there’d be no planning or building or creating for the future.” (04:45)
- Suleika expands: Not only does this advice feel unhelpful, it’s actively harmful—especially for those confronting mortality or uncertainty.
“What I’ve had to shift to is a gentler mindset. Because when I’m living every day as if it’s my last, it’s so much pressure. ... That is just a spiritually exhausting way to move through your life.” (05:47)
- Alternative: Living each day as if it’s your first—emphasizing curiosity, playfulness, and awe (06:25).
2. Balancing Ambition with Presence
(07:47)
- Suleika shares how, before her illness, she was “too future focused,” striving under immense pressure to honor her immigrant parents’ sacrifices.
- A cancer diagnosis upended her need for forward momentum, teaching her to enjoy the present.
“There is [not] infinite time to finally get to a place where you can enjoy your life... It’s so easy to focus on doing rather than being.” (09:21)
- Living “for the eulogy virtues” (who you are, not just what you accomplish).
3. The Power & Practice of Journaling
(03:27; expanded 14:37, 16:19)
- Suleika describes her eclectic journaling:
“People use journaling in all kinds of ways. ... Sometimes my journal looks like a painting, sometimes it looks like one sentence or a grocery list.” (03:40)
- During cancer treatment, journaling adapted as needed—including a “visual journal” (painting fever dream images when she temporarily lost her sight) (12:58).
“You really have to surf the waves of uncertainty without trying to direct or control what’s happening.” (13:44)
- Journaling as a space for processing, intuition, and self-knowledge:
“It’s where I get to show up for myself, without expectation... and just see what happens.” (16:19)
- Shared journaling with husband Jon Batiste: writing daily letters, deepening their relationship with surprising honesty (14:44).
4. Reflecting, Not Just Recording: Journaling vs. Phone Photos
(19:28)
- Journaling prompts us to observe our own lives and pay attention to subtle joys, versus “jolting” ourselves out of the experience by snapping photos.
“It’s also training the eye...I find myself seeking those details out in the world.” (19:51)
- Citing Mary Oliver: “To pay attention is our endless work.”
5. From Private Writing to Collective Sharing
(23:09; expanded 27:22)
- Suleika credits her journal with helping her name and share fears—especially with John, facilitating honest conversations about mortality and commitment (25:00).
“When I find that I’m able to be in conversation honestly with myself on the page, then I have deeper conversations with the people around me.” (25:59)
- Experimenting with “journaling clubs”: groups gather to write privately, then share whatever emerges—without exposing their “deepest, darkest secrets,” but sparking unusual, meaningful conversations (27:22, 29:14).
- “I’m interested in gatherings that aren’t anchored around small talk, that make space for unusual conversation.” (29:14)
6. Rethinking Journaling Prompts
(32:09)
- Adam admits to disliking prompts; Suleika reframes them:
“A prompt allows you to twist the chamber ever so slightly so the light falls differently...It’s what allows me to stay consistent.” (32:09)
- Prompts can be vehicles for dialogue—with oneself, others, or the voices of thinkers and writers we admire (34:15).
7. Contribution Journals vs. Gratitude Journals
(35:10)
- Adam’s research with Jane Dutton found that recording one’s contributions (rather than just gratitude) builds a more active sense of meaning and agency.
“When they wrote about what they were grateful for...it also left them feeling passive...Whereas when they wrote about their contributions, it created an active sense of ‘I matter.’” (35:44)
- Suleika’s practice during illness: focusing on “three things I can do today,” later reflecting on “the three things that mattered most to me.” (36:25)
8. Holding Both Levity and Gravity: Fun Age and Play
(40:48)
- Adam notes Suleika and John’s unique “dual” soulfulness and playfulness.
- Suleika: “[Our] fun age is both 80 and 8. Yes, we are total boring homebodies... And we’re also little kids.”
- Prank calling, playful absurdity: “I’ve never laughed harder in my entire life.” (42:16)
- Example prank: Calling novelist Jonathan Franzen, pretending to be from the Alabama Football Association, asking for a kidney donation (43:16).
- Importance of cultivating childlike wonder, humor, and delight—especially amidst adversity.
9. Lightning Round—Quick Wisdom
(45:25)
- Dream dinner party guests: Questlove, John Green, Elizabeth Gilbert, and Barbara (their adopted aunt/former police detective/ceramic artist) (45:32).
- Bad advice: “God doesn't give you more than you can handle” and “Everything happens for a reason” (46:05).
- Unpopular opinion: “I love a cold call. I hate trying to make a plan over text message.” (46:35)
- Final question: What would your first day look like? For Adam, it’s about discovering what brings his kids joy and leaning into “fun over fear.” (47:14)
Notable Quotes
-
On Living Differently:
“I really believe in some ways [‘live each day as if it’s your last’] is the worst advice...I’ve come to believe that it’s bad advice. … Instead, I’m trying to live every day as if it’s my first—to wake up with a sense of curiosity and playfulness and wonder that a little kid might.”
— Suleika Jaouad (05:47–06:25)
-
On Journaling:
“For me, it’s the most direct channel I have to my intuition and to my subconscious. … It’s where I get to show up for myself, without expectation, without pressure to be anything other than my most unedited, unvarnished self.”
— Suleika Jaouad (16:19)
-
On Creative Adaptation:
“You really have to surf the waves of uncertainty without trying to direct or control what’s happening.”
— Suleika Jaouad (13:44)
-
On Play and Levity:
“For both John and me, our fun age is both 80 and 8. … We’re also little kids. … We really intentionally cultivate and try to tap into that sense of not just childlike wonder but complete absurdity and hilarity.”
— Suleika Jaouad (41:50)
-
On Noticing & Savoring:
“It’s so easy to move through your life in a blur without actually pausing to note the things that are happening around you. The really simple things.”
— Suleika Jaouad (19:51)
-
On Contribution:
“What were the three contributions that made me feel most nourished, most in integrity with myself? Most successful? And not in the conventional sense of success, but in the sense of feeling like you’ve done good.”
— Suleika Jaouad (36:25)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Living each day as your first, not last: 04:27–07:47
- The curse/blessing of ambition: 07:47–10:42
- Adaptive creativity and journaling practice: 12:58–16:19
- Shared journals & deepening connection: 14:44–15:55
- Journaling vs. snapping photos—training for noticing joy: 19:28–20:49
- Private reflection to dialog & “Journaling Clubs”: 23:09–29:14
- Prompts as permission and creative shift: 32:09–34:15
- Contribution journals vs. gratitude journals: 35:10–37:44
- Levity, fun age, and pranking: 40:48–45:24
- Lightning round Q&A: 45:25–47:49
- Closing reflections: 47:50–48:29
Memorable Moments
Overall Tone
Gentle, playful, philosophical, and deeply personal. The conversation swings between gravitas and lightness, balancing honest talk about mortality and uncertainty with stories of joy, surprise, and connection. Both Adam and Suleika are candid, occasionally irreverent, and always aiming to help listeners see life—and their work lives—in a new, more compassionate light.
This summary was created to provide a rich, engaging synthesis of the episode, capturing all main themes and highlights for listeners and non-listeners alike. All timestamps are formatted MM:SS for easy reference.
