Searching for Soldier Dad: 5. Answers

Summary

World of Secrets – Searching for Soldier Dad: Episode 5 "Answers" (BBC, May 18, 2026)

Overview

In the powerful conclusion to the "Searching for Soldier Dad" series, journalist Ivana Davidovich pursues justice and closure for the children fathered by British soldiers during their deployments in Kenya—children whose fathers disappeared, leaving families without recognition or support. This episode explores the institutional and personal obstacles to accountability, highlighting the lived experience of those affected, recent legal progress, and systemic inertia on both sides of the UK-Kenyan divide.

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Key Themes & Discussion Points

1. Inside the British Army's Response

[02:48 – 15:41]

• Setting the Scene: Ivana interviews Brigadier Simon Ridgway, responsible for British Army training programs in Kenya (Batuk), at Warminster Army Barracks in England.
• Training in Kenya: Batuk is "fundamental" for military readiness and is described as a uniquely challenging environment with "demanding conditions." (Ridgway, [03:47])
• Kenyan Inquiry Findings: A recent Parliamentary report in Kenya accuses the British military of covering up abuses and neglect, stating “Batuk's immunity from Kenyan law effectively fosters impunity.” ([06:07])
• Pattern of Abandonment: Ivana exposes the long-standing nature of paternal abandonment, noting the "oldest child...is 70. The youngest is only 3. This is not about a handful of irresponsible dads." ([04:23])
• Official Stance: Ridgway insists paternity is a "private life issue," handled via channels specified in the bilateral Defence Cooperation Agreement. The Army “cannot comment further.” ([09:56])
• Accessibility Issues: Interviewers press on the difficulty for Kenyan women and children to access support or information, with Ridgway conceding the system is “time consuming and frustrating” but bound by UK-Kenyan agreements. ([11:10])
• Training or Not?: The Army claims to train soldiers on cultural awareness and “zero tolerance” of sexual exploitation ([12:46]), yet cannot confirm any specific training regarding obligations after fathering a child. ([13:33])
• Regret—but little change: Ridgway recognizes "misunderstanding, miscommunication in the past," and expresses "deep regret any negative impact from our presence in Kenya." ([14:23])

Notable Quotes

• Brigadier Ridgway: “All the issues to do with paternity, they're a private life issue and we are there to support and answer any...allegations that come in.” ([09:56])
• Brigadier Ridgway: “We need to respect the Defence Cooperation Agreement... It would be wrong of us to try and get round that agreement.” ([12:18])
• Andrew MacLeod (Australian lawyer): "For the MOD to now say this is a private matter is revolting beyond belief. The MOD should be...giving those British citizen children the rights that the Ministry of Defence is set up to defend." ([16:18])

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2. The Human Impact—Personal Stories & Legal Fallout

[17:48 – 44:15]

Kathy & Maggie

• Kathy ([19:27 – 23:14]): Now a young adult, Kathy is slowly building a relationship with her father (Phil) after being contacted through the DNA project.
  • On her dad: “Not exactly like someone I see as a dad...we're not yet there.” ([20:33])
  • On support: “I hope he does [support me]. I really don't expect anything, to be honest, because expecting things just ends up disappointing you.” ([22:36])
• Maggie ([23:46 – 25:28]): Reflects on raising Kathy alone, her heartbreak, and resilience. Was forced to sell her engagement ring to feed her daughter. “I can forgive him, but I can't forget.” ([24:41])

Peter

• [25:32 – 28:09]: After a joyful reunion, Peter finds himself emotionally distanced from his British father, expressing pain and dashed hopes.
  • On unmet expectations: “What makes me sad is I thought things would be different when I find him...But me, I just need my dad, that's all.” ([27:04])
  • After receiving a reassuring message: “If he needs time, I will give him time...I hope for the best.” ([27:56])

Yvonne

• [28:34 – 31:56]: Yvonne, orphaned young, has gone from believing her father is dead to seeking a connection after DNA evidence identifies him. Her father (Kieran) refused all contact, culminating in legal summons and reluctant court-ordered DNA testing in the UK.
  • On hope and loss: “If we happen to find him, then he denies I'm not his child...I wish this would have never happened because I had hopes that he will be found. And he's now found and he still denies it, I'll be much offended.” ([31:30])

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3. Legal Precedent & Systemic Change

[35:14 – 44:15]

• Groundbreaking Legal Path: London lawyer James Netto leads cases using commercial DNA databases—“For the first time, evidence from commercial DNA databases has been used in the family courts in the UK.” Over 20 cases have gone to court, with more pending. ([38:29])
  • On the court's surprise: “I cannot remember the last time I felt so flabbergasted...I think I said to you before I'd eat my hat if he showed up at court. My God, I did not expect him to be there.” ([37:29])
• Responsibility Unmet: None of the fathers so far have started to pay child support voluntarily; new cases keep emerging. ([39:27])
• Long-term Consequences: The precedent may allow tracking and holding accountable fathers of abandoned children worldwide, regardless of nationality.
• Charity Response: Kenyan lawyer Kelvin establishes "Connecting Roads Kenya" to support the affected children.
  • On possible bans: Kelvin rejects a “ban” on soldiers’ relationships, warning of racist undertones: “The only feasible solution is just to ensure that these men are held accountable when they father children while...training in Kenya.” ([41:46])
  • On love and disappointment: “Sometimes we want to love people who do not love us back and there is no way we can stop loving them.” ([42:22])

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• James Netto, lawyer:
  “You've got men being paid by the British taxpayer going out to Kenya and...getting hundreds of local women pregnant.” ([08:37])

• Andrew MacLeod:
  “For the MOD to now say this is a private matter is revolting beyond belief.” ([16:18])

• Kathy:
  “Not exactly like someone I see as a dad...we're not yet there.” ([20:33])

• Peter:
  “I just need my dad, that's all.” ([27:04])

• Yvonne:
  “I can't imagine being a girl's daddy, having my dad back.” ([29:29])

• Anthea (UK relative):
  “I just think blood is thicker than water. I suppose in my life, the age I am now, I feel perhaps this is my opportunity to help somebody.” ([34:19])

• Kelvin (Kenyan lawyer):
  “They've gone through that which most of us will never have gone through...And they've survived and come out of it alive.” ([41:20])
  “This process seems to be never ending. It seems to really never end. It's a chain. The end of one case signifies the beginning of another.” ([43:57])

---

Important Timestamps

• Interview with Brigadier Ridgway: [02:48–15:41]
• Andrew MacLeod's response: [16:18]
• Kathy’s story update: [19:27–23:14]
• Peter’s update: [25:32–28:09]
• Yvonne’s legal struggle and hope: [28:34–31:56, 35:14–38:29]
• Lawyer James Netto on legal precedent: [38:29–40:46]
• Kelvin on ongoing need and solutions: [40:59–44:15]

---

Tone & Atmosphere

The episode is investigative, empathetic, and unflinching—balancing rigorous scrutiny of institutional failings with intimate, often wrenching personal stories. The voices of Kathy, Peter, and Yvonne cut through legal jargon and bureaucratic language, revealing the deep, enduring impact of abandonment and the mixed feelings brought by reunification. The legal team and advocates express both hope and frustration, emphasizing the urgent need for systemic change.

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Concluding Thoughts

Ivana Davidovich and the World of Secrets team illuminate the complexities and consequences of paternal abandonment involving British soldiers in Kenya—an issue that could remain hidden without international pressure and grassroots activism. As legal avenues open and DNA technology brings new answers, this episode leaves unresolved the question of emotional healing for those affected, pointing to the need for accountability, compassion, and lasting change. The case is evolving; advocates like Kelvin and James continue to fight for justice, and personal journeys unfold, uncertain but no longer invisible.

Transcript

[Narrator/Host]

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[Ivana Davidovich]

Before we start, I just wanted to let you know that more World of Secrets investigations are in production right now. You won't want to miss them. So do follow or subscribe so you never miss an episode. Before we get started, if I could just give you the quick health and safety brief. We're in a nondescript one story block at Warminster Army Barracks in the southwest of England. As we drove in, we passed a huge military tank parked on the lawn outside. What I would ask, please, and this is really important, is you're on red

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

passes, so you have to be escorted

[Narrator/Host]

everywhere you go in this building, okay?

[Ivana Davidovich]

This is the British Army's key training hub for soldiers and officers.

[Narrator/Host]

Any other emergencies, don't worry about it.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

Just do whatever we tell you to do.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Up to now, we've heard from the children fathered by British soldiers Their mothers and one father. But there is one perspective we haven't heard. After months of communication with the UK Ministry of Defence, they have agreed to an interview with Brigadier Simon Ridgway, the commanding officer for the Collective Training Group. The producer, Josephine and I talked to the Brigadier as my colleagues set up our cameras. He knows the British Army Training Unit Kenya, or Batuk, as it's called, very well. He first trained there himself back in 2012 and he's been there many times since. Do you have any memories of when you were there?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

Yeah, you know, the fact that you wake up in the morning, you can see Mount Kenya in the distance, the wildlife that's there, you know, I think it's a pretty incredible place to go and I think everyone who goes there comments on the sort of the unique experience it is and, you know, what a privilege it is to train there.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Tell us a bit about what's the

[Interviewer/Reporter]

role of Batuk for the British military.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

So it is a fundamental part of our ability to train our people either to deploy on operations or to be held at readiness to deploy on operations. And the thing about Batok is the size of the training area that we have access to and the demanding conditions that people have to train in while they're there. There is nowhere else we can do the type of training we do.

[Ivana Davidovich]

I suppose it sounds to me like,

[Interviewer/Reporter]

for you, making sure that Batu can survive and stay in Kenya and that the host country is happy about it is quite important.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

It is absolutely fundamental. I mean, I think that is something that we take so incredibly seriously and is at the forefront of our minds at all stages.

[Ivana Davidovich]

The British military's training unit in Kenya is essential to its operations and they have invested huge amounts of money into vast training fields over decades. But in Kenya, there is hostility towards the British military presence and their future in the country is under scrutiny. For two years, I've been following a DNA testing project which has tracked down British soldiers who fathered children in Kenya and then disappeared. What we've uncovered is a pattern that spans decades. The oldest child of a British soldier in this project is 70. The youngest is only 3. This is not about a handful of irresponsible dads. This goes much deeper and I want to get answers about why this pattern has persisted from when Kenya was a British colony until today. Why mothers have been left without financial support and children left searching for their dads.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

If somebody hears your interview who is struggling to survive because they're trying to support a child on their own, do you think they'll Be heartened by your answers now.

[Ivana Davidovich]

This is World of Secrets season 12 searching for soldier dad a BBC World Service investigation. I'm Ivana Davidovich, a BBC journalist. Episode 5 answers Kenya has launched a

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

landmark inquiry against the Royal British army. Decades of human rights abuses and sexual abuses.

[Ivana Davidovich]

In December last year, a Kenyan Parliamentary committee published a 94 page report following a two year inquiry into the conduct of the British Army Training Unit Kenya, or Batuk. It covers the period from independence until the present day. The inquiry found Batuk's immunity from Kenyan law effectively fosters impunity. Particularly there have been reports of misconduct by Batuk sources. Community engagement by Batuk was found to be severely lacking. The report said that local communities had complained of killings, assaults, public fights and fatal traffic incidents involving British soldiers. The most infamous case highlighted in the report is that of Agnes Vanjuru. It's alleged that 21 year old was stabbed by one or more British soldiers, her body left in a septic tank. But no one has ever been brought to justice. It's one of the most chilling cases. But that report highlights a pattern of behaviour and concludes that the British Army Training Unit Kenya is increasingly seen as an occupying presence rather than a development partner with affected residents drawing parallels to colonial injustices. Kenya was of course a British colony until the 60s. And there's something repeatedly raised in this report which is much closer to our the children abandoned by British soldiers, children fathered by Batuk soldiers have been neglected by their British fathers. It's even included in the recommendations that UK and Kenyan governments should negotiate mechanisms to to hold soldiers accountable for child support for those born of relationships between Kenyan women and British soldiers. And this is not the first time this issue has been on the agenda of the British military. In 2003 the British military conducted an internal inquiry through which they identified 69 children fathered by soldiers. That was over 20 years ago. Now there are nearly a hundred documented cases of children born to British military personnel in Kenya who have grown up without knowing their dads. But the DNA project's lawyer in London, James Netto, who's been representing his clients in the courts in the uk, believes it may be more.

[James Netto]

You've got men being paid by the British taxpayer going out to Kenya and I mean, look, they're training in Kenya and in that time they're getting hundreds of local women pregnant. And you and I are paying for this. We're all collectively paying for this, bankrolling them to be there. So they've got a lot to answer for. The mod knows this all too well. Look, I've written to them, they've had inquiries. The Kenyan Parliament has been investigating this. They can't continue to turn a blind eye to this.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

Yeah, well, hopefully I am in a position to answer all your questions.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Yeah, well, at the MOD's training hub, I sit across from Brigadier Ridgeway. He's dressed in army fatigues and a beret and he shuffles through his notes.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Through our own reporting, we have heard numerous accounts of British soldiers fathering children in Kenya. And we know that these people, these children, these offspring, range in ages from 3 to 70. I think you would agree that British soldiers are representatives of the British state. What responsibility does the Ministry of Defence take for this?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

So I think all the issues to do with paternity, they're a private life issue and we are there to support and answer any or deal with any allegations that come in. I think the important thing is for people who have those concerns or allegations that they then go through the correct channels. There's the opportunity to engage with the Kenyan National Children's Service. They then engage with the UK and we then provide whatever support in terms of answering questions and dealing with those allegations as they come in. But I don't think I can comment any further on that.

[Ivana Davidovich]

As I listen to this, I think about Peter, the 34 year old who says he tried to ask for help seven times at the British military barracks in Anuki.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

We have spoken to several people who have said to us, they have tried to go to Batuk authorities, they've tried to access community liaison officers, they've been told that the one in charge is not around or they just couldn't really understand how to access any information they need. Do you not think that for the benefit of the local community and these children, you should make it easier for these people to access these offices?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

So we operate under the current Defence Cooperation Agreement, which is an agreement between the UK and Kenyan governments that stipulates that any interaction with us needs to be done through the Kenyan Ministry of Defence.

[Ivana Davidovich]

The Defence Cooperation Agreement is a pact between the Kenyan and UK governments which sets out the terms under which the British military is allowed to operate in the country. These agreements allow for the British military to train in the country. In return, they train Kenyan soldiers and the two countries cooperate on anti terrorism efforts.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

And so we need to abide by that Defence Cooperation Agreement. And that can sometimes be time consuming and frustrating. If we want to change that process, then that requires a request to go in to the Kenyan Ministry of Defence.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

So are you actually saying to me that because there is some wording in the Defence Cooperation Agreement that if there is a mother that has a one year old child and she's not getting any answers or support from the father of her child, that she needs to be petitioning the Minister of Defence of Kenya to speak with anybody within the army.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

We need to respect the Defence Cooperation Agreement which are the rules that regulate how we operate and work in Kenya. And it would be wrong of us to try and get round that agreement. That wouldn't be appropriate.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Tell me about the training of the soldiers. Do you think that pre deployment training should include what happens if a soldier fathers a child, what is expected from him?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

In response to a number of investigations and inquiries, we've introduced a whole load of new measures that we now conform to. That includes making sure that all those soldiers who deploy to Batak prior to departure and on arrival are briefed on their roles, their responsibilities, the customs, the regulations, the laws in Kenya and the culture to make sure that they understand what the consequences could be. And reinforcing the fact that we have a zero tolerance approach to sexual exploitation and abuse.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Well, having a child is not an offence regardless of the circumstances of conception or a relationship. Is there anything in the training that you are providing now that specifically talks about the obligations if a soldier has a child?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

So all that the training that is conducted highlights the fact that lots of this is sexual exploitation and abuse of people and that that is unacceptable.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

What do you tell them about fathering children? What is the part of the training at the moment? If you can tell me a bit more about it?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

So I'm not able to go into any of the details of that.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

As we stand right now, if somebody hears your interview who is struggling to survive because they're trying to support a child on their own, do you think they'll be heartened by your answers now?

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

So I can only imagine how difficult those circumstances must be. But we need to continue to abide by the rules and policies and regulations of the Defence Cooperation Agreements that we have with the Kenyan government.

[Ivana Davidovich]

I want to know how the Brigadier feels about that Parliamentary Committee report which said that the British army in Kenya is increasingly seen as an occupying presence.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

We're there at the invitation of the Kenyan government. We work incredibly hard with local communities and leaders to make sure that we're working to do the best possible training that we can, while also investing in the local economy and into making a difference with local communities. We've answered all the questions that were posed to us openly, honestly, transparently, We've supported any sort of investigation. Some of the details were perhaps incorrect or inaccurate. I think the response that we provided to the Parliamentary inquiry recognized that there were issues, challenges, misunderstanding, miscommunication in the past, and we deeply regret any negative impact from our presence in Kenya.

[Ivana Davidovich]

And what about that recommendation in the Kenyan Parliamentary Committee report for the two governments to begin immediate negotiations to establish mechanisms to hold British soldiers accountable for child maintenance and to support further DNA testing? That report was published four months ago. I want to know if there has

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

been any progress in response to the Parliamentary inquiry. There have been regular meetings between both the UK and the Kenyan Ministries of Defence to talk about what was highlighted in that inquiry and providing a response, and that work is ongoing.

[Ivana Davidovich]

After the interview, we followed up with the Ministry of Defence to request precise details of any training given to soldiers on their responsibilities if they father a child. They sent us an overview of their training on sexual abuse and exploitation, which did not include any mention of fathering children. After the interview, I spoke to Andrew MacLeod. He's the Australian lawyer who we met in Kenya and who had the original idea for the DNA testing project. I told him about some of the mod's responses and even over the video call, his anger was palpable.

[Narrator/Host]

For the MOD to now say this is a private matter is revolting beyond belief. The mod should be going out to Nanuki with DNA tests and say, anyone who claims that their father was a British soldier, please spit in this tube, do the DNA test and give those British citizen children the rights that the Ministry of Defence is set up to defend. The Ministry of Defence's role is to defend not just the land mass of Britain, but British citizens.

[Ivana Davidovich]

For the participants in the DNA project, now their fathers have been confirmed, many can begin the registration to become British citizens. But this project has always been about much more than passports. For many, it has provided answers to lifelong questions about who their fathers are and where they come from. And some are now in touch with their dads, hoping to build relationships. In November 2025, a year after the first DNA samples were collected, we go back to Kenya for a final time to find out where this story ends for Kathy, Peter and Yvonne,

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Is that you?

[Ivana Davidovich]

Hello. So nice to see you. I'm with Kathy at a rooftop cafe overlooking Nairobi.

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[Ivana Davidovich]

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[Ivana Davidovich]

Skyline how have you been?

[Kathy]

I've been good. Just living life. I've gotten a job finally and I'm just adulting right now, I guess, and surviving. Yeah.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Kathy's mum, Maggie, met her dad, Phil, when he was on a deployment in Kenya. They were engaged, but when Kathy was a baby, Phil left and never returned. Kathy spent years trying to contact her dad over Facebook. Since we met last year, a lot has changed for Kathy. She's finished school, moved to Kenya's capital, Nairobi, and started talking to her dad, Phil, who was located through the DNA project. We spoke to him in the last episode. He said he wanted to build a relationship with Kathy. Do you remember the exact day when you first heard from your dad?

[Kathy]

Yeah, it was awkward. We're not that close yet. We're getting there.

[Ivana Davidovich]

What do you make of him?

[Kathy]

I mean, he's cool, I guess. I mean, I haven't really, you know, been that deep with him yet, so I can't exactly place him somewhere yet. He's just someone I'm talking to right now. Not. Not exactly like someone I see as a dad or anything. Just. We're not yet there.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Have you had any difficult conversations about why he abandoned you?

[Kathy]

No, I'm not that. I can't say confident. I just don't feel like it's the right time to have a deep conversation with him. I'd like to get to know him first and at least establish a bond so that we can can go further into Such conversations.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Kathy's finished high school, but she doesn't have the certificate yet. Her mum hasn't been able to pay off the tuition fees for her final year, so she struggled to move on in her education or career. She's managed to find reception work at a high end gym, but her employer only pays her a small travel and food allowance of around $80 a month, calling it an internship. She's supplementing her income with some acting work in local soap operas. What are you hopeful for?

[Kathy]

I'm hopeful for starting school, maybe when I'm 21, and maybe getting to travel more and explore and I can finally know myself. I can get to know myself as a person. More expensive me than just one part of myself.

[Ivana Davidovich]

It's time for Kathy to start her shift at work, so we jump in a taxi and head over to the gym. She tells me that Phil has sent her and her mum some money over the last couple of months. Do you expect him to support you

[Interviewer/Reporter]

now or do you just hope he does?

[Kathy]

I hope he does. I really don't expect anything, to be honest, because expecting things just end up

[Yvonne]

disappointing you, so I just let things

[Kathy]

go in the flow.

[Ivana Davidovich]

He was very convinced when you talk

[Interviewer/Reporter]

that he sort of sees you two

[Ivana Davidovich]

as being quite alike in your mannerisms and your style of speaking. That's what he was saying.

[Kathy]

Kind of. Kind of, because there's parts where we'd actually laugh at literally nothing and I'd sit down and be like, why were we laughing again?

[Kelvin]

Do you still feel angry with that?

[Kathy]

I mean, I'm neutral right now, to be honest. I don't know exactly what to feel. So I just decided instead of feeling angry or sad or whatever, to just let it just pass by the way

[Yvonne]

it's going to pass by and we'll know later on.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Hello. Hi.

[Brigadier Simon Ridgway]

How are you?

[Ivana Davidovich]

You have different hair. You are very

[Maggie]

happy.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Next stop, Kathy's mum, Maggie. She's also moved to Nairobi since we last met.

[Maggie]

Things have changed since we met last year. At least I'm in a better position right now, I would say.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Maggie compared her and Phil's romance to Romeo and Juliet. There were love letters, even a public proposal at Nairobi airport. But then the heartbreak of his departure haunted her for years. Now that Phil has been found through this project, they're in regular contact. And when I met Phil, I was surprised to hear he had hopes they might get back together.

[Maggie]

Yeah, he's like, now he won't come back and like the other day he texted me and said, oh, I wish you were Here, I'm not rude, but I'm firm. I have my boundaries. Who is going to compensate me

[Anthea]

for

[Maggie]

the 18 years that I have done the work alone?

[Ivana Davidovich]

You know,

[Maggie]

then we are talking about me going through a lot because of him. So, okay, I can forgive him, but I can't forget.

[Ivana Davidovich]

As we're talking, I notice that Maggie's finger is bare. When I met her at the DNA testing in December 2024, she was still wearing the engagement ring Phil gave to her all those years ago. Not anymore. She tells me she sold it a few months ago when she and Kathy were struggling to buy food.

[Maggie]

It hurt me to sell the ring. I think. I was like, maybe one day he will come back. But I told him the truth the other day and he was like, he's fine with it. He'll buy another one. I'm like, so he's saying that he will buy another ring? Yeah, that's what he told me. Because I told him I sell because we didn't have food would mean your daughter.

[Anthea]

Yeah.

[Ivana Davidovich]

I wonder if finally having some answers about what happened to Phil after all these years of questioning will allow Maggie to move into a new phase of her life. She's hoping to start her own business in Nairobi. But will Phil be part of this new phase? Next, we're on the road towards Nanyuki and its cooler mountain air. We drive to Peter's family's avocado farm, where I first met him a year ago. Peter's mum raised him alone in poverty in Anyuki and suffered from alcoholism. Peter used to dream of finding his father, and through this project he did, the two of them were reunited on an emotional video call.

[Peter]

I hope we see us very soon. I still got love for you, dad.

[Ivana Davidovich]

But as soon as Peter and I start chatting, I can tell that the hope I felt from him before has faded.

[Peter]

Things didn't come out how I thought they would come out. I thought, when I find my dad, he will be there for me. But right now I don't feel like he cares about me because he don't talk to me much.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Peter says that they haven't spoken since their video call a few months earlier. Just the occasional message. On that call, there were promises made of adding Peter to the family WhatsApp group or maybe meeting in person one day. But to Peter, they're starting to feel empty.

[Peter]

What makes me sad is I thought things would be different when I find him. You know, maybe he thinks I'm after his money or I don't know. But me, I just need my dad, that's all.

[Ivana Davidovich]

As we're talking, I get a glimpse into this new relationship when Peter receives a message from his dad.

[Peter]

He just replied now. Yeah.

[Maggie]

What did he say?

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Do you don't mind me asking?

[Peter]

He told me, please rest assured that I do care about you. We all appreciate your message and respect your feelings. It's only been three months and we are still processing as a family. Please be patient. Love, dad.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Reading this message, Peter's whole demeanour softens. That hope is back in his eyes. Okay, so you feel heartened by this.

[Peter]

If he needs time, I will give him time. You know, let's see what will happen. Maybe next year things will be different. I hope for the best, you know.

[Ivana Davidovich]

This last year has been a roller coaster for Peter. The hope of finding his father followed by the pure joy of speaking to him for the first time, calling him dad. And then now there is a flatness of unfulfilled expectations. On their final trip to Kenya in December last year, Peter, there's one person still waiting to make contact with their dad.

[Maggie]

How are you?

[Ivana Davidovich]

Hello, you gorgeous girl. You've grown. Yvonne, the 18 year old budding journalist who grew up believing she was an orphan. Her mum died when she was a baby and she believed her dad did too. Her grandma told us that British soldiers had passed on a message to the family that Yvonne's dad had died. But the DNA testing project has since identified her father. We're calling him Kieran. But neither James, the lawyer in London, the court nor I have managed to make contact with him and it's getting serious. If he continues not to respond to James requests, the judge may take additional steps like summoning his mother to court or even issuing a warrant for his arrest. For Yvonne, she's gone from believing this man is dead to hoping for a relationship with him.

[Yvonne]

I can't imagine being a girl's daddy, having my dad back. I just knew like he was dead. I had no thoughts that would be found and heard the news that he's alive. I was feeling happy. I was happy.

[Ivana Davidovich]

You mentioned that term, daddy's girl. What does that mean to you?

[Yvonne]

Him giving me the love that I deserve. Like he appreciates me being in his life.

[Ivana Davidovich]

For Yvonne, this search for her dad has ignited the grief she feels for her mum.

[Yvonne]

Also miss her too. Even though I've never seen her, I missed her. I miss her too.

[Ivana Davidovich]

It's hard growing up without a mum, right?

[Yvonne]

Yeah, it's not.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Nothing really replaces that.

[Yvonne]

I just wish I was with my mom. Like everything will be A little bit better knowing that I have my mom on my side.

[Ivana Davidovich]

What is the in your dreams?

[Interviewer/Reporter]

What do you see if she was

[Ivana Davidovich]

still alive, you and your mom doing together?

[Yvonne]

Going for picnic with her, taking photos. Like enjoying every single moment. Yeah. With her beside me,

[Ivana Davidovich]

Yvonne has missed out on the love of a parent. And listening to her, I have a feeling of apprehension. Is this man who isn't responding to the court going to fulfill her dreams of a father, daughter relationship? Can you picture a scenario where you think, I'd rather I never had found him, you know, where things don't work out the way you want to and maybe you think I was actually more at peace when I thought he was dead.

[Yvonne]

You've. If we happen to find him, then he denies I'm not his child. Maybe I would be more desperate and I wish this would have never happened because I had hopes that he will be found. And he's now found and he still denies it, I'll be much offended.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Do you care about other family members? Would you be interested, though, to find out about them?

[Yvonne]

Yeah, I think I'll be interested.

[Anthea]

So you might like to see some of my granddaughter's artist efforts. And you see the pair of ballet shoes there because they both do ballet

[Ivana Davidovich]

back in the uk. I'm in a suburban house in the south of England.

[Anthea]

And then hearts. They love doing stickers and obviously an award there, but we're never quite sure what it's for.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Children's paintings are strung up on a piece of string across the kitchen wall.

[Anthea]

I did my DNA, so my husband's very keen on family history and I thought, why not?

[Ivana Davidovich]

We're going to call this woman Anthea, to protect the privacy of her family. She's in her 70s with short gray hair and a long blue dress. When I meet her, we've been talking on the phone for weeks and she's just as warm in person. She tells me that for months her DNA was sitting on Ancestry's database. Occasionally she'd get a notification about a third or sixth cousin somewhere in the world. But then her search for a long lost relative took a turn she never expected.

[Anthea]

I was a bit surprised, getting a letter from a lawyer on very official looking paper.

[Ivana Davidovich]

She calls the number at the bottom of the letter. It's for lawyer James Neto.

[Anthea]

When I had the conversation with James, I know one of the things he did, he did tell me the name of the girl, Yvonne.

[Ivana Davidovich]

This girl, he tells her, might be a relative.

[Anthea]

It was a huge surprise. And to begin with, I thought couldn't Connect anything with Kenya. And then I thought, ah, yes, that's right, that is my cousin that was out there.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Yvonne's dad, Kieran, is still not responding to the court and Anthea feels a sense of responsibility.

[Anthea]

Yvonne's a relative of mine, maybe not particularly close, but she deserves to find her family and perhaps get some help from her family.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Why is this so important to you

[Ivana Davidovich]

that you are engaging with this process, that you're doing the exact opposite of your other family members?

[Anthea]

I just think blood is thicker than water. I kind of feel, I suppose in my life, the age I am now, I feel perhaps this is my opportunity to help somebody. I would love Yvonne to meet some of my family. I'm from a big family and I would love her to be able to join in, in that. So hopefully one day that's going to happen sooner rather than later and hopefully, you know, give her an opportunity, perhaps with her further education, so that she can reach her potential. So I'm sure she's got ambitions and they'd be lovely to have those ambitions fulfilled. And I think she wants to be a journalist and wouldn't that be amazing?

[Ivana Davidovich]

Anthea doesn't have Kieran's address, so she can't help James locate him. The months roll by and there's still no word from Kieran, the man who Yvonne believed was dead for her whole childhood. Lawyer James has tried everything to track this guy down. Emails, social media messages, phone calls, court bailiffs have been sent to multiple addresses. He's even tried to contact Kieran via his mum. Kieran has now breached five court orders. James says that he can't recall any other case in which he's had to go to such lengths to locate an individual. For months, I've been turning this over in my head and I cannot think why this man would not respond to orders from the court. Yvonne is 18 now. He will not be liable for child maintenance. It just doesn't make sense. In February, I go to meet James back at the court in London. Today, he thinks the judge will issue a warrant for Kieran's arrest to force him to come to court. As we're sitting outside the courtroom, from the corner of my eye, I see a familiar face. Not somebody I've met, but somebody whose photo I've looked at many times. It's Kieran, Yvonne's dad. I can't believe it. Then suddenly, we're ushered into the courtroom. Kieran sits at the front and the judge addresses him. We have waited for you long enough, he says at the judge's. Request. Kieran agrees to a confirmatory DNA test to prove that he's Yvonne's dad. Outside the courtroom, I approach him. He seems polite, calm, with a gentle smile on his face. He shakes my hand and I introduce myself. I ask him how he's feeling now he might be confirmed as a father, his reply indifferent. He gives me his email address and I say, I would love to talk to him. He nods and then he's off. Next to me, James is bursting with nervous energy.

[James Netto]

I cannot remember the last time I felt so floored or so flabbergasted, surprised as I did today's hearing, having geared up so much to get an arrest warrant out for this gentleman. I think I said to you before I'd eat my hat if he showed up at court. My God, I did not expect him to be there.

[Ivana Davidovich]

A week later, the results come in from the DNA test. They're positive. Kieran is indeed Yvonne's father. James delivers the news to Yvonne on a video call.

[Yvonne]

I'm just saying I'm kind of excited.

[James Netto]

I hope he does. I hope he does the right thing. Yvonne, there's no guarantee. Can I ask you something? It's completely up to you. It's your decision. It's completely up to you. Would you like me to ask him whether you'd like. Whether he'd like to meet you?

[Yvonne]

If you want to meet me, then I also want to meet him. Yeah. I'm ready.

[Ivana Davidovich]

I find out that since Yvonne realized that this man is probably her dad, she has started using his surname at school, writing it on her notebooks. James emails Kieran to ask if he would like to meet his daughter. He replies, saying he's undecided. Then, not long after, James receives another message from Kieran. He says he doesn't want to meet Yvonne. For now, at least. I email Kieran to see if he'll speak to me, but I get no reply. I remember the niggling feeling I had as we left Kenya about the risks of finding people's fathers, bringing them into contact with men who, in many cases, knowingly abandoned them. For Yvonne, Peter, Kathy and Maggie, some of the answers this project has found don't provide the closure they hoped for. They beg more questions. But as we record this final episode, Yvonne is arranging to speak for the first time with her British relative, Anthea. This case has been unprecedented in the legal system in the UK. 20 cases so far have gone to court and many more are in the pipeline. For the first time, evidence from commercial DNA databases has been used in the family courts in the uk. The ramifications of this could be far reaching. It opens the door for the same method to be applied elsewhere to locate fathers of abandoned children anywhere in the world. And any man who has knowingly or unknowingly fathered the child might be found through these databases and could be made legally and financially responsible. So James, the lawyer in London, is now preparing for another set of court cases to demand child support for the children under 18. None of the fathers located so far have started to pay voluntarily.

[Kelvin]

This has been the most fulfilling case of my career and have worked with these children and the mothers and honestly they have been one of the most bright people I've come across.

[Ivana Davidovich]

In Nanyuki, Kenyan lawyer Kelvin has set up a charity called Connecting Roads Kenya to support the children of British soldiers. Kelvin grew up near Nanyuki and has been coordinating the DNA project on the ground. We spoke to him on the veranda of our hotel. Military helicopters from the army base circling overhead.

[Kelvin]

They've gone through that which most of us will never have gone through, even 10% of it. And they've survived and come out of it alive.

[Ivana Davidovich]

What if the simplest solution is that soldiers be banned from having any relationships with women while they're on deployment? Having seen all the havoc and heartbreak these relationships have caused, you might think Kelvin would agree with. But he doesn't.

[Kelvin]

This will be very racist in nature because you are asking predominantly white soldiers to avoid black women because they may bring them trouble. And the only feasible solution is just to ensure that these men are held accountable when they father children while during their training duration in Kenya.

[Ivana Davidovich]

As a Kenyan man, Kenyan black man, do you sometimes get annoyed that so many women from your community are attracted to this white man that treat them like trash? Some of them. Does that annoy you as a man?

[Kelvin]

You know when people fall in love, these are issues that even the law cannot litigate. So some things defy logic, they defy all reason. But I think these are the things that at the end of the day still make us human. That we sometimes want to love people who do not love us back and there is no way we can stop loving them.

[Interviewer/Reporter]

Maybe that should be the final sentence.

[Ivana Davidovich]

That might be the final sentence. That's not quite the final sentence. A few days later, I'm with Kelvin at his office.

[Kelvin]

And today we have three new clients who hopefully we'll be seeing their fathers in court.

[Ivana Davidovich]

He's taking DNA samples and helping with paperwork. Sitting, waiting is an 18 year old man. He says his dad lived with him and his mum until he was two and then never came back. It all sounds so familiar. What do you hope will happen? I hope maybe if he wants me

[Kelvin]

back, maybe it's okay. It really means that this is not just a past issue. Simply means that this is a continuous issue. I have a referral for a client who told me that she's three months pregnant of a British soldier's child.

[Ivana Davidovich]

Once the child is born, Kelvin will take a DNA sample and try to find the father.

[Kelvin]

This process seems to be never ending. It seems to really never end. It's a chain. The end of one case signifies the beginning of another.

[Ivana Davidovich]

This has been episode 5 of 5 of season 12 of World of Secrets Searching for Soldier dad from the BBC World Service. World of Secrets Searching for Soldier dad is a long form audio production for the BBC World Service. It's presented by me, Ivana Davidovich. The series is produced and written by Josephine Casserly. The Series Editor is Matt Willis. Sound design and mix by Tom Brignall and Rod Farker. The script advisor is is Lucy Proctor. Our Production Coordinator is Katie Morrison for BBC World Service Podcasts. Ann Dixie is Assistant Editor. Katie Davies is Senior Podcast Producer. The Podcast Commissioning Editor is John Mennell. We would like as many people as possible to hear our investigations, so please leave a rating and a review and do tell others about World of Secrets. Discover Top Rated Stays Loved by Guests Rated Highest by real guests through authentic reviews Verbo Book A Vacation Rental Loved by guests.