Why Work Stress Invades Your Dreams

Summary

WSJ Your Money Briefing
Episode: Why Work Stress Invades Your Dreams
Date: October 22, 2021

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Episode Overview

This episode tackles a relatable phenomenon: the persistence of work-related stress even after the workday ends—sometimes following us right into our dreams. Host J.R. Whalen speaks with WSJ Work and Life columnist Rachel Feinsig, as well as individuals who experience vivid work stress dreams, to examine why we dream about work and what—if anything—we can do to keep it from robbing us of restful sleep.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

What Triggers Work Stress Dreams?

• Common Roots: Most work-related stress dreams are tied to personal insecurities and a sense of falling short on the job, regardless of occupation.
  • Rachel Feinsig: “A lot of it is about our own insecurities, like places we think we're falling short. ... So much of it is about, like, I'm not good enough.” (02:23)
• Universality: These dreams cut across all roles, from waitresses anxious about forgetting an order to CEOs fearing missed deals.

Relationship Between Daytime Stress & Nighttime Dreams

• Dreams as Brain Processing: Dreams act as a continuation of daily thought patterns, helping “take some of the emotional sting out of events that happen during the day.” (02:53)
• Lingering Anxiety: Whatever worries you during the day is likely to resurface in your dreams, sometimes in surreal or exaggerated forms.

The Pandemic's Impact on Work Dreams

• Increased Anxiety: COVID-19 led to more anxious dreams, some nonsensical but deeply rooted in fears about health, job security, and workplace changes.
  • Feinsig describes bizarre pandemic-influenced dreams—walking on dirty carpets at work, being surrounded by plexiglass, or coworkers coughing (03:21).
• Work and Life Blend: Fears of layoffs or old bosses reappear, sometimes linked to early jobs or formative experiences.

How Stressful Dreams Manifest for Real People

• Ebony Anderson, Designer:

  • Dreams about project management: “Every time anything came up in this dream, the individuals pop up almost like Star Trek style. So my contractor pops up... I need to do, and inspections and deadlines...” (04:22)
  • Found inspiration in dreams: “I had this dream where I'm in this space that was a lot like the 1920s or 30s... all of the things that I was missing... And once I could feel it, then I can design it.” (05:23)

• Purpose of Stress Dreams:

  • Sometimes these dreams spark creative solutions or important realizations.
    • Feinsig: “People can come up with like brilliant ideas because they're kind of visualizing things in a new way... Inspiration and solutions coming to people in dreams.” (05:54)

• Godard Abel, CEO of G2:

  • Recurring anxiety dreams about being unprepared for key meetings:
    • “I've had this recurring dream that it's the middle of the day and all of a sudden I realize I have a big meeting with a customer and I've completely forgotten about it...” (06:34)
  • Physical reaction: “It's intense physical anxiety. My body feels very tight. I feel crunched up.” (06:48)

Strategies to Reduce Work Stress Dreams

• Advice from a Guru (Godard Abel):

  • No eating/drinking 3 hours before bed
  • Avoid screens and work, do something relaxing
  • Cold shower to “rinse off” stress
  • Meditation before bed
    • “By following these steps, I sleep much more deeply. ... I don't have these anxiety nightmares.” (07:17)

• Expert Sleep Tips for Everyone:

  • Focus your thoughts on what you want to dream about as you fall asleep (e.g., “I want to be in Bora Bora tonight”) instead of thinking “I don't want to dream about work.”
    • Feinsig: “There's about a 50% chance that that is what you will dream about. ... It's giving yourself a little bit of control over your dreams.” (07:58)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Work dreams are often the stuff of nightmares. But why do we have those kinds of dreams? And how can we train our minds not to have them?” – J.R. Whalen (01:52)
• “She'll wake up shouting like ketchup to table 43.” – Rachel Feinsig, describing how even small stresses show up vividly in dreams (02:37)
• “It's almost like the stresses are spawning a TV show in her dreams.” – J.R. Whalen, on Ebony Anderson's recurring work dream (05:02)
• “Once I could feel it, then I can design it.” – Ebony Anderson, describing how a dream informed her work (05:48)
• “At some point my mind is like, I hope it's just a dream. Wake up, wake up.” – Godard Abel (06:56)
• “Don't think to yourself, I do not want to dream about work tonight. Instead, think to yourself, I want to be in Bora Bora tonight.” – Rachel Feinsig (07:58)

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Important Timestamps

• 02:23 – Common triggers of work stress dreams
• 02:53 – Daytime stress and nighttime dreams connection
• 03:21 – How pandemic anxiety shapes dreaming
• 04:22 – Ebony Anderson shares a vivid recurring work dream
• 05:23 – Dreams leading to work breakthroughs and creative insight
• 06:34 – Godard Abel recounts recurring anxiety dreams
• 07:17 – Rituals for better sleep and fewer work nightmares
• 07:58 – Practical advice for steering dreams away from work

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Conclusion

This episode provides a revealing look into why our minds can't always leave work at the office, even when we close our eyes. Through expert insights, personal anecdotes, and actionable advice, listeners are offered both understanding and practical strategies for reclaiming their sleep from the clutches of work stress. The message is clear: while stress at work is almost universal, with the right tools and mindset, we can keep it from haunting us at night.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Here's your money briefing for Friday, October 22nd. I'm J.R. whalen for the Wall Street Journal. It may feel hard enough handling the stress of your job when you're awake, but for a lot of people, work stress follows them into their sleep.

[C]

Every time anything came up in this dream, the individuals pop up almost like Star Trek style. So my contractor pops up and he tells me all of the things that I'm missing or that I need to do and inspection and deadlines.

[B]

So what triggers stressful work dreams and what can we do to prevent them? Coming up, we'll hear from two people who've had recurring work dreams and how to work through the stress to get rid of them. That's after the break.

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[B]

Missing deadlines, old bosses making surprise appearances, standing up to give a presentation in your boxers. Work dreams are often the stuff of nightmares. But why do we have those kinds of dreams? And how can we train our minds not to have them? WSJ Work and Life columnist Rachel Feinsig has been looking into how the stresses of the workday linger long after we turn off the lights and get into bed. Rachel, thank you very much for coming on the show.

[D]

Thanks so much for having me.

[B]

So you know, Rachel, having stressful dreams about work isn't unusual. But what typically triggers these kinds of

[D]

dreams, a lot of it is about our own insecurities, like places we think we're falling short. And I saw this from people in all sorts of jobs. I mean, I talked to a waitress who dreams about, like, dropping a tray, or she'll dream about the one bottle of ketchup she forgot to bring to a table earlier in the day. She'll wake up shouting like ketchup to table 43. So it's just fascinating to me. We see it, like I said, in all kinds of careers, but so much of it is about, like, I'm not good enough.

[B]

So what's the relationship between our nighttime dreams and what we do during the day?

[D]

You know, one expert told me that dreaming is kind of just thinking in a different brain state or brain space. I mean, the idea is that whatever is kind of bugging you during the day is going to show up in your dreams. And there's also evidence that we kind of process things. We kind of take some of the emotional sting out of events that happen during the day by dreaming about them at night.

[B]

So you've spoken with experts who studied people's sleep and their dreams during the pandemic. How do they say the pandemic has worked its way into how people dream?

[D]

This stuff was so weird. I mean, it's like the general idea is just more anxiety in our dreams, whether they're about work or not. But some of the work dreams, you know, it's like you go back to the office and your company has installed a brand new carpet, but it is dirty and wet and they make you take off your shoes and walk across it, or all your co workers are coughing on you, or your company has installed plexiglass, but instead of separating your desks, it is encircling everyone all together in this diseased fest. So I mean, just like you can see people's anxiety about COVID people's anxiety about things like job loss. An expert told me that people were dreaming about being laid off by their first boss at their teenage job. All of this stuff kind of comes together in kind of nonsensical ways, but I think so much of it is about our fears and worries.

[B]

California resident Ebony Anderson experiences work related fears and insecurities every day in her job. She's been designing a cannabis speakeasy in Los Angeles. And Rachel, she told you the mountain of details have sparked some pretty intense dreams at night.

[C]

I have a reoccurring dream where I'm almost in this spaceship. I have a huge screen in front of me and I'm getting, you know, intel. But with this project, every time anything came up in this dream, the individuals pop up almost like Star Trek style. So my contractor pops up and he tells me all of the things that I'm, that I'm missing or that I need to do and inspections and deadlines. And then I have my business partner and she'll pop up and she'll tell me, you know, all of the things that we have concerns with around money and investments.

[B]

You know, Rachel, it's almost like the stresses are spawning a TV show in her dreams.

[D]

I know, it's pretty wild, right? We talked about how it was a combination of like her playing Tetris with these boxes or some kind of, kind of action movie playing in the background. And it's, you know, dreams are very, very vivid. They can help people see things that they otherwise just wouldn't have.

[B]

But then something interesting happened. Ebony says that amid those bizarre work dreams, she got some clarity about her job.

[C]

And even though I figured out the measurements and the colors and the light fixtures, I couldn't get the feeling that it was supposed to have. And I had this dream where I'm in this space that was a lot like the 1920s or 30s. And it was all of the things that I was missing. The smells and the feels and the feel and the ambiance of this space. And so I could feel it. And once I could feel it, then I can design it.

[B]

So, Rachel, it's almost like for some people, these stress dreams have a purpose.

[D]

This is really common. People can come up with like brilliant ideas because they're kind of visualizing things in a new way. They're not being held back by kind of some of those things in your brain when you're awake where you might, just might say, that's not possible. There's all sorts of examples of kind of inspiration and solutions coming to people in dreams. Or it can help you just come to a realization like, I really need to, to leave this job. This boss that has been haunting me in this recurring nightmare for the last month, like he is reason to leave now.

[B]

You also spoke with Godard Abel. He's CEO of the business software reviews site G2. He also has recurring dreams about work. And they're a little reminiscent of the dreams some of us had about being late for school.

[E]

I've had this recurring dream that it's the middle of the day and all of a sudden I realize I have a big meeting with a customer and I've completely forgotten about it and I'm completely unprepared. Or Even worse, it's 30 minutes into a 60 minute meeting and I've missed the biggest client opportunity of my life. And it's intense physical anxiety. My body feels very tight. I feel crunched up. And like these recurring nightmares, they keep cycling. I think at some point my mind is like, I hope it's just a dream. Wake up, wake up. But it takes me, I don't know, it seems like 20, 30 times until finally I can snap out of it and wake up.

[B]

But Godar did something about it. He felt that the stresses of his dreams were impacting his sleep and his waking hours. And so he got advice from a guru in India while on a business trip.

[E]

It involves about three hours before bedtime. One, you start by no more food, no more drink. And two, you start doing relaxing things. Reading a book, going away from screens, going away from work. And he also recommends taking a cold shower to really rinse off both the physical and mental baggage you have on your body and doing a meditation. And by following these steps, I sleep much more deeply. I don't have these anxiety nightmares. And I wake up what seems like much more quickly feeling much more refreshed.

[B]

Now, Rachel, most of us don't have a guru in India to consult, but experts you spoke with had some other tips so that work dreams don't affect job performance. What do they tell you?

[D]

I thought this was a really great tip. Apparently, if you just focus on something else that you want to dream about, something pleasant, as your head hits the pillow as you're laying there in bed, there's about a 50% chance that that is what you will dream about. So don't think to yourself, I do not want to dre about work tonight. Instead, think to yourself, I want to be in Bora Bora tonight. And just say it over and over and over again, and there's a good shot it'll happen. It's giving yourself a little bit of control over your dreams.

[B]

All right, that's Wall Street Journal columnist Rachel Feinsic. Rachel, thank you so much for being with us.

[D]

Thanks for having me.

[B]

And that's your Money briefing. I'm J.R. whalen for the Wall Street Journal.

[A]

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