Podcast Summary: You Are Not Broken

Episode 348: The Sex Doctors – AKA Two Urologists and a Sex Therapist Have A Chat
Host: Dr. Kelly Casperson, MD
Guests: Dr. Abraham Morgentaler (Urologist), Dr. Marian Brandon (Sex Therapist)
Airdate: December 7, 2025

Episode Overview

In this lively and insightful episode, Dr. Kelly Casperson welcomes Dr. Abraham Morgentaler and Dr. Marian Brandon—married co-hosts of The Sex Doctors podcast—for a wide-ranging conversation about the intersections of urology, sex therapy, medical myths, and the realities of sexual relationships in midlife and beyond. Blending personal anecdotes, evidence-based science, and candid humor, the trio breaks down how sexual health knowledge changes (or stubbornly lags) in the medical world, what people get wrong about men and women sexually, and how couples can navigate desire, boredom, and communication roadblocks.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introducing the Guests & Their Podcast

• The Sex Doctors podcast:
  • Six months old; celebrated for being short, playful, and grounded in science.
  • Kelly: “I’m obsessed with it. I love that it’s flirty and playful and brings hard science into actionable tips.” [01:45]
  • Guests reflect on their early podcasting journey with humor.

2. History & Evolution of Testosterone Wisdom

• Medical dogma on testosterone and prostate cancer:
  • Dr. Morgentaler recounts the origins of the myth that testosterone causes aggressive prostate cancer.
  • Cites misleading research from the 1940s-1980s, based on very limited and flawed patient data.
  • “It turned out amazingly that it was based on just one patient…” [05:03]
• Paradigm shift:
  • Modern medicine now recognizes informed consent and individualized risk-benefit analysis for testosterone therapy, even post-prostate cancer.
  • Kelly draws parallels to hormone counseling for breast cancer survivors.

3. Changing Medical Culture & Advocating for Women

• At the FDA:
  • Kelly shares her experience addressing the FDA, pushing for a female-dosed testosterone product without male-centric restrictions or DEA regulation.
  • “I asked for when we get the female dose testosterone, I want a DEA exclusion on this... This is not a nefarious performance enhancing drug.” [10:18–10:32]
• Obstacles & Real-world consequences:
  • Physicians are sometimes targeted for prescribing female-dose testosterone, an inefficient use of resources that chills good care.

4. Meeting & Collaboration: Origin Story

• How Drs. Morgentaler & Brandon met:
  • Met at a conference where Marian was inspired by Abraham’s contrarian, positive perspective on men’s sexuality.
  • Initially collaborated on academic writing before romantic involvement, complete with jokes about “physicians’ handwriting.” [15:11]

5. Male Orgasm Myths and Communication Gaps

• Do men fake orgasm?
  • Abraham: “In college studies, the numbers were huge. 20% plus...”
  • Motivations are similar to women: sparing feelings, ending an encounter, etc. [15:53–17:16]
  • Case study: helping a man with orgasm difficulty via associating sensory cues (French perfume) from formative sexual experiences.
  • Kelly: “A challenging thing... in a 10-minute visit, you can't get to the French perfume part...” [18:03]
• Doctors, time constraints, and referral culture:
  • Marian recommends physicians develop referral networks to sex therapists and specialists to address the nuances beyond generic advice.

6. Problematic Medical Advice & Myth Busting

• Common but poor advice:
  • Kelly relates that a major cancer center advised cancer survivors to use Crisco as a lubricant—drawing disbelief and laughter.
  • This highlights the gap between modern science (e.g., vaginal estrogen) and clinical guidance actually given. [19:18–19:50]
• Should testosterone be a screening test in men?
  • Abraham: “Every man who turns 30... should probably get a testosterone level.” [20:08]
  • Debunks the myth that blood draws must be before 9am; his studies show timing is mostly irrelevant outside very rare circumstances. [21:48–27:31]

7. Barriers for Women: Testing & Treatment

• Sexist lab practices:
  • Kelly reports a major US lab refused to check a female patient’s testosterone level simply because she was female, shifting excuses when challenged. [27:44–28:19]
• Call for simplification and sanity in hormone practice.

8. When Sex Gets Boring — What Now?

• Standard advice falls short:
  • Marian: “Try something new is everywhere, but eventually, people run out of things to try.”
  • Mindfulness is the secret weapon: focusing on body sensations creates a new experience each time, no matter the activity. [28:27–30:56]
• Epic quote: Kelly: “Buy a new piece of lingerie, which has probably solved zero people's problems long term, but is great for the lingerie industry.” [29:11]
• On mismatched adventurism in couples:
  • Marian suggests exploring new tech, VR porn, or toys for compromise when sexual curiosity/desire mismatches exist. Advocates for communication and creativity.

9. Good Sex Tech & Resources

• Sex toy and tech resources: Marian recommends sexualityresources.org, and Amazon for “a whole lot of stuff.” Her Psychology Today blog is also mentioned as a good general resource. [34:32]

10. Understanding Sexual Misconceptions in Men & Women

• What women get wrong about men:

  • Marian: “Women think men should be like they are... Men and women have different sexual instincts.”
  • Kelly: “We tend to think everyone thinks like us. But in sex, the whys are often very different.” [35:13–36:19]
  • Even in couples, partners often disagree on seemingly factual questions like “when did we last have sex?” [36:45]

• What men get wrong about themselves:

  • Abraham: “Men are supposed to always want sex, always perform. If not, both partners often assume something is wrong with the relationship or the man.”
  • Many men internalize erection or desire issues, not realizing how much environment and context (stress, for instance) matter. [37:12–38:46]

• Objectification and Desire:

  • Women often want to be desired but not objectified—“not a repository for your sexual need” [41:50]
  • Marian offers a nuanced perspective: the difference is in presence and connection, eye contact, not just the act itself. [39:37–41:15]
  • Abraham clarifies that this language is often foreign to men, who benefit from actionable, simplified feedback.

11. Wrap-Up: The Never-Ending Journey

• Sex, says Kelly, is a lifelong personal growth and spiritual journey—never the same topic twice. [43:53–44:29]
• Mutual appreciation closes the episode, with Kelly promising to keep supporting their podcast and teasing future collaborations.

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• “I fell off my dinosaur to do some of that work.” – Dr. Abraham Morgentaler on his longevity in urology [03:00]
• “It was based on just one patient… followed for only 18 days.” – Dr. Morgentaler, exposing the weak foundation of testosterone-prostate cancer dogma [05:03]
• “We can change things. We can relook at the data… medicine is not set in stone.” – Dr. Kelly Casperson [08:12]
• “I want the DEA restriction off… I can’t make a woman a gold medalist pole vaulter by giving her physiologic female T doses.” – Dr. Kelly Casperson [10:18]
• “The average guy objectified me, he would think that was so... to them it’s like a gift.” – Dr. Marian Brandon on male desire for objectification, as fantasy [42:05]
• “There’s so much more to seduction than your genitals.” – Dr. Marian Brandon [41:01]
• “It’s not the flaw, it’s the default software.” – Dr. Kelly Casperson, on the wandering mind during sex [30:14]
• “A challenging thing... in a 10-minute visit, you can't get to the French perfume part.” – Dr. Kelly Casperson, on the time constraints in medical practice [18:03]
• “Try something new is everywhere, but eventually, people run out of things to try.” – Dr. Marian Brandon [28:28]

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment | Timestamp | |-------------------------------------------------|-------------| | Introduction & Podcast Praise | 01:45–02:19 | | Testosterone History & Myths | 03:00–08:12 | | FDA Advocacy for Women & Testosterone | 09:10–11:28 | | Drs. Morgentaler & Brandon: How They Met | 13:01–15:13 | | Do Men Fake Orgasms? | 15:53–17:16 | | Systemic Issues: Poor Medical Advice | 19:18–19:50 | | Should Testosterone Be a Screening Test? | 20:08–21:48 | | Time of Day for Testosterone Testing | 22:10–27:31 | | Barriers for Women (Labs, Biased Practices) | 27:44–28:19 | | Sex Gets Boring? Mindfulness Over Novelty | 28:27–30:56 | | Adventurism Mismatches & Sex Tech | 31:52–34:04 | | What Women Get Wrong About Men | 35:13–36:16 | | What Men Get Wrong About Themselves | 37:12–38:46 | | Objectification and Connection | 39:37–41:58 | | Closing Reflections: Sex as Lifelong Journey | 43:53–44:29 |

Resources Mentioned

• The Sex Doctors Podcast: Hosted by Drs. Abraham Morgentaler & Marian Brandon
• Sexuality Resources: sexualityresources.org
• Marian Brandon’s Blog: Psychology Today (search for Marian Brandon)

Final Thoughts

This episode is a master class in bridging the science and humanity of sexuality, debunking outdated myths, and advocating for nuanced care and open-mindedness—whether inside the bedroom, physician’s office, or at the FDA. Kelly, Marian, and Abraham’s humor and candor demystify the medical and relational complexities of sex at every stage of life, reminding listeners: you are definitely not broken.