You Betcha Radio Episode #349: New York City VS. The Midwest 🎙

Date: October 22, 2025
Hosts: Myles “You Betcha Guy,” Ryan, Tyler, Jerrod
Theme: Contrasting life, culture, and quirks between New York City and the Midwest, peppered with the crew’s signature humor, storytelling, and a deep dive into “sports parenting.”

Episode Overview

In this episode, the You Betcha crew explores the glaring differences and humorous similarities between life in bustling New York City and their familiar Midwest roots. Ryan returns from a trip to NYC, sharing fresh tales and observations, which spiral into a riotous conversation about urban living, Midwest values, culture shocks, and ultimately spins off into their comedic "guide" for being a top-tier (and probably terrible) sports parent. The episode is filled with lighthearted ribbing, cultural commentary, and the kind of relatable Midwest humor that regular listeners have come to love.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. New York vs. The Midwest: Stereotypes, Surprises, and Culture Shocks

(Timestamps below)

• Ryan’s NYC Vacation Recap

  • Opens with the misconception that “the city that never sleeps” now refers to Vegas, but historically, it's NYC. ([00:51])
  • “City never sleeps? Midwest cities are the ones that get the appropriate amount of sleep.” ([02:10])

• Public Transit: Subways vs. School Buses

  • NYC kids’ independence riding the subway alone is mind-blowing to the crew. In the Midwest, it was all about bikes or waiting at a bus stop. ([02:48])
  • Tyler teases, “We rode our bikes around town, they just ride the subway.” ([03:20])

• Living Situations & Green Spaces

  • The hosts marvel at tiny NYC apartments vs. the Midwestern dream of “a house with a yard.”
    • “In New York, you’re just a faceless number... In the Midwest, you’re paying attention to who you’re walking by or driving by.” – Ryan ([04:51])
  • Jokes about the luxury of having two rooms, or not smelling the toilet from your bed. ([04:33])

• Crowds, Skyscrapers, and Tourist Life

  • Difficulty adjusting to skyscraper neck strain: “Midwesterners need iPad-sized mirrors with handles so you can look down but see up!” – Ryan ([05:57])
  • Minneapolis vs. NYC: Not the size, but the sheer volume of buildings ([06:44])

• No Gas Stations in NYC & Everyday Convenience

  • “There are no gas stations, Tyler...They don’t drive.”
  • The bodega as the snack solution: “Most of my New York knowledge is from Marvel movies.” ([09:19])

• Attitude, Pace, and Sociability

  • Small talk struggle: NYC is rapid and transactional, while Midwesterners love to chat. ([10:44])
  • “Tried to joke with a store clerk, fun playful joke – she didn’t know what to do.” – Ryan ([11:13])

• NYC Diversity & Neighborhoods

  • “Every single culture you can think of is in NYC. It’s a block of Chinatown, then boom, you’re in Little Italy.” – Jared ([08:00])
  • Turf wars: “NYC’s turf wars are real mobs, Midwest turf wars are two dads trying to out-lawn each other.” ([09:00])

• NYC Iconography and Tourist Traps

  • The omnipresence of “I ❤ NY” stores, compared to if every 8th shop in Fargo was “I ❤ Wood Chipper.” ([07:05])

2. Memorable New York Experiences

(Timestamps below)

• Times Square & Photo Hustlers

  • Asking for photos = someone expects payment in NYC; in the Midwest, it’s an old lady with a finger over the lens. ([10:23])

• Superheroes on the Streets

  • “You can see every superhero in Times Square...and get your photo for sure.” ([10:18])

• Safety and Urban Chaos

  • Hosts marvel no one dies daily given the chaotic criss-cross of cars, bikes, and buses.
    • “In the Midwest, it’s blizzards; in New York, it’s traffic. How do people not die more?” ([12:04])

• Street Vendors and Scams

  • “The amount of fake watches, purses, and sunglasses getting slung around is unbelievable. Ended up with an Oasis CD when I thought it was OAR…” ([15:19])
  • Tourist scams, including fake Statue of Liberty ferry tickets, are impressively convincing. ([32:52])

• Sept 11th Memorial Reflections

  • Ryan shares a detailed and moving account of the 9/11 Memorial & Museum, expressing deep respect for both the experience and the stories of heroism.
    • “It was wild to be at... If you’re going to New York City, you should go to the memorial.” ([16:33–19:30])
    • Emotional takeaways: “A lot more people should have died, which is good but also sad. If it happened an hour later, thousands more would’ve been in the building.” ([19:44])
    • The ethics of 9/11 merch (“Never Forget” mugs): awkward or memorial? ([19:12])

• NYC Travel Nightmares

  • Ryan’s journey home included delayed flights, scramble for new tickets, and a late-night rental car drive from Minneapolis to Fargo. Rental car logistics after midnight get a laugh. ([22:33])

• Missed Iconic Spots

  • Didn’t visit the Statue of Liberty up close; just saw it from Manhattan. Imagines the impact for immigrants seeing “Lady Lib” for the first time. ([25:04])

• French Food, Chinatown Mishaps, Pizza

  • “French” restaurants are just American food with French ownership.
  • “Did see a guy just with his dick out, just pissing on a building. I guess that’s like the Midwest, just NYC is at 3pm not 3am.” ([28:01])
  • NYC pizza: “The floor is so high—it’s better than an average place here, anywhere you go.” ([27:26])

• Hotel Sizes

  • “We splurged for a more expensive hotel—13x13 room, a tiny bathroom, a 6x6 nook. What’s a ‘cheap’ room like?” ([28:34])

• Cops, Ambulances, and City Living

  • “Saw eight cops in a Dunkin Donuts—stereotypes come from somewhere!” ([35:56])
  • Ambulances in gridlock: “NYC must be the worst place to have a heart attack.” ([35:14])

3. Midwest Life: Small Towns, Sports, and Family

(Timestamps below)

• Friendliness and Small Talk

  • Midwest: “We can make small talk for five, ten minutes. In New York, it’s wrap it up, got stuff to do.” ([10:44])

• Parenting and Sports: The Satirical Guide

  • Massive extended segment (approx. [39:16]–[55:51]) lampooning “sports parent” culture—overbearing, hyper-competitive, living vicariously through their kids, obsessing over coaching, wins, and gear.
    • Memorable Satirical Quotes:
      • “If you want to be a good sports parent, you need to be insufferably negative to your child and insufferably positive to everyone else.” ([44:11])
      • “If you’re not first, you’re last” and “If you have fun, you’re a loser.” ([48:16])
      • “If your kid’s happy, you’re doing sports parenting wrong.” ([55:51])
    • Satire includes:
      • Projecting your failures and ambitions on your kids
      • “Live feedback” to kids, refs, and coaches (yell at everyone, constantly)
      • Goggles, sleeves, matching gear for maximum “drip” and “confidence”
      • Hilarious “travel” (playing in far-flung small towns) as a Midwest substitute for vacations

• Transition to Sports Grandparenting

  • The grandparent stage becomes the opposite: “With grandkids, it’s—‘You having fun, buddy? That’s all that matters.’” ([57:17])

4. Fun & Absurdity: The Great Job Site Blunt Rotation

([57:52]–[63:38])

• Dream Construction Site “Blunt Rotation”
  • The hosts design their “ideal” work crew: the wild card, third-party vendor, best friend, class clown, encyclopedic “Petey”, strong-man, ex-con, new guy, the boss, Luke from “Outdoor Boys”, and even Shrek.
  • “There’s nothing better than getting in an enclosed space with people and just letting her rip.” ([69:15])
  • “Ratchet strap the new guy, he’s gonna be getting freaked out...” ([68:37])

5. Rapid Fire Midwest Bits

• Debating the best way to put on belts—men vs. women ([78:01])
• The “curve” of a worn dress belt ([80:06])
• Mascot suit trauma (“it’s 115 degrees in there!”) ([76:15])
• The evolution from sports parent to “glory days” sports grandparent ([53:11])
• Question: "Fornicate, assassinate, elope" with Halloween family events ([72:23])
• Random fun fact: “At 40, we'll have more career NFL receiving yards than Brett Favre in his 40s.” ([69:55])
• Who won Super Bowl 1979? “Steelers beat Cowboys 35-31.” ([71:48])

Notable Quotes & Moments

[02:10] Ryan:
"If New York City is the city that never sleeps, Midwest cities are the cities that get the appropriate amount of sleep."

[04:51] Ryan:
"In New York City, you’re just a faceless number…In the Midwest, you’re at least paying attention to who you’re walking by."

[07:05] Ryan:
"Imagine if every eighth store in Fargo was an ‘I heart Fargo’ store."

[10:23] Ryan:
"In New York, if you ask a stranger to take a photo, they're going to try and get money out of you for it. In the Midwest, they’ll do it for free, but it’s some old lady with her finger over the lens."

[12:04] Ryan:
"In the Midwest, I don’t know how we drive through blizzards and not die more. It’s crazy."

[16:33] Ryan (re: 9/11 Memorial):
"It’s wild to be at…if you’re going to New York City, you should go to the memorial."

[19:44] Ryan:
"A lot more people should have died, which is good and also sad…if it would’ve happened an hour later, thousands more would’ve been in the building."

[28:01] Ryan:
"In Chinatown, I did see a guy just with his dick out, just pissing on a building. …His was at 3pm; ours is usually at 3am."

[35:56] Ryan:
"Saw eight cops in a Dunkin Donuts – stereotypes come from somewhere and I got to witness it firsthand."

[44:11] Ryan (on sports parenting):
"If you’re gonna be a good sports parent, you need to be insufferably negative to them and insufferably positive to everyone else."

[48:16] Unknown:
"If you’re not first, you’re last. And if you’re second…You’re just the first loser."

[55:51] Ryan:
"Basically, if your kid’s happy, you’re doing sports parenting wrong."

Essential Timestamps

| Timestamp | Topic / Segment | |-------------|-----------------------------------------------------| | 00:44 | Ryan’s NYC trip begins | | 02:10 | NYC sleep vs. Midwest sleep philosophy | | 02:48 | Subway kids & Midwest bus nostalgia | | 04:51 | “Faceless number” & personal connection | | 05:57 | Skyscraper-mirror bit for Midwestern tourists | | 07:05 | “I ❤ NY” tourist trap comparison | | 08:00 | Cultural variety, Chinatown vs. Little Italy | | 10:23 | Midtown photos & expectations | | 12:04 | Traffic, chaos, and fearlessness (city vs. blizzard)| | 16:33-19:30 | 9/11 Memorial review & emotional impact | | 22:33 | The journey home: rental car saga | | 25:04 | Statue of Liberty: missed opportunity | | 27:26 | NYC pizza reflections | | 28:34 | Hotel room sizes, cost, and expectations | | 35:56 | Stereotypes: "Eight cops in a Dunkin Donuts" | | 39:16-55:51 | Sports Parenting Satire | | 57:52-63:38 | Dream blunt rotation on a Midwest job site | | 69:55 | Fun fact: Outgaining Brett Favre (receiving yards) | | 72:23 | Halloween “Fornicate, assassinate, elope” lightning | | 78:01 | Belt orientation: men vs. women |

Tone & Style

• Authentically conversational: The group riffs effortlessly, layering on inside jokes, relatable lines, and running gags.
• Satirical, self-deprecating Midwest wisdom: Many segments are intentionally exaggerated or tongue-in-cheek, especially the “sports parenting guide.”
• Nostalgic but unfiltered: The crew doesn’t shy away from crude memories or urban Midwest comparisons.

For New Listeners

• If you’ve ever wondered how New York City looks through Midwest-tinted glasses, or if you want to vicariously experience city chaos and Midwestern camaraderie, this episode is for you.
• The show is best enjoyed with a sense of humor and familiarity with Midwest humor, sports culture, and, ideally, a beverage in hand ("sippy sip").

Listen For…

• “Mirrored sunglasses for skyscraper looking” ([06:15]) – classic Midwest fix-it creativity.
• Satirical “sports parenting” ([39:16–55:51]): Over-the-top, but rings painfully true for anyone raised with competitive parents.
• Honest, heartfelt take on the 9/11 Memorial ([16:33–19:30]).
• Absurd “blunt rotation” crew-building—with everything from job site wild cards to Shrek and Snoop Dogg ([57:52–64:00]).
• Miscellaneous Midwest bits: Dress belt curvature theories, mascot PTSD, and Halloween event hot takes.

In sum:
This episode is a love letter to everything “Midwest Vs. The Big City”—equal parts observational humor, cultural differences, personal travel logs, and unapologetic nostalgia. By the end, you’ll either want to visit NYC yourself or cement your loyalty to the land of green lawns and eight hours of sleep.