Women Might be Smarter Than Men 🎙 #321

Summary

Podcast Summary: You Betcha Radio - Episode #321: "Women Might be Smarter Than Men"

Release Date: April 9, 2025

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Introduction

In episode #321 of You Betcha Radio, titled "Women Might be Smarter Than Men," host Miles and co-hosts Ryan, Tyler, and Jared delve into a variety of engaging topics ranging from innovative product ideas to gender dynamics in friendships. True to their Midwest roots, the conversation is filled with humor, nostalgia, and candid discussions that resonate with their audience.

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Jared’s Translucent Chapstick Idea

Timestamp: 00:43 – 05:33

The episode kicks off with Jared presenting his ambitious idea for a new kind of chapstick. He proposes creating a premium chapstick with translucent ingredients and packaging, aiming to increase sales through frequent repurchase due to the product's visibility.

• Jared: "We make like one of the best chapsticks in the world, but we make everything translucent... people lose it and then have to buy more."

Discussion Highlights:

• Ryan expresses skepticism about the practicality, joking about losing the chapstick even faster: "I'll own that one for three hours, not three days."
• Tyler adds humor by suggesting enhancements like adding trace amounts of nicotine to make the chapstick addictive, further urging repeat purchases.

Notable Quote:

• Miles: "Why do we need premium ingredients? That'S like, it's got to be the best chapstick they've ever had in their life."

Despite the playful criticism, the team appreciates the creativity behind the idea, recognizing its potential in the market.

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Chapstick Usage Among Men and Wives

Timestamp: 01:02 – 05:56

The hosts transition into discussing chapstick usage habits, revealing that while Tyler and Miles rarely use it, Ryan frequently applies it but tends to lose it quickly. They observe that chapstick is predominantly used by their wives, highlighting a gender difference in grooming habits.

Notable Quotes:

• Ryan: "I use Chapstick very regularly, but then I lose the chapstick within a couple days."
• Jared: "My wife uses it all the time."

This conversation sets the stage for Jared's chapstick innovation, underlining the market demand primarily driven by women.

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Miles’ Vacation Story and Friendship Dynamics

Timestamp: 05:00 – 19:55

Miles shares an anecdote from his vacation in Cambodia, where he unexpectedly befriends a man named Rob in a pool setting. This story leads to a deeper discussion on how men and women form friendships differently.

Key Points:

• Miles describes the straightforward manner in which he initiated the conversation: "You just got... you just see you, I'm gonna have a conversation with you. And they are your friend."
• The group explores the idea that women might be more cautious and selective in forming friendships compared to men, who tend to bond quickly over shared interests.

Notable Quotes:

• Miles: "Women are just smarter than us, so they have their guard up a little bit more and need a little more time to ensure that someone has got good character."
• Ryan: "They're just way more careful than us."

The discussion touches on evolutionary psychology, suggesting that historical survival mechanisms have influenced modern social behaviors, making women more discerning in their friendships.

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Masters Week Bets and Golf Predictions

Timestamp: 20:00 – 27:10

As golf's Masters week approaches, the hosts engage in friendly betting on the tournament's outcomes, integrating humor and camaraderie into their predictions.

Discussion Highlights:

• The team discusses various golfers and their chances, with Ryan favoring Cam Young, and Tyler backing hometown favorite Tom Hoagie.
• Jared contributes by predicting a high stroke count for Bryson DeChambeau, adding to the lighthearted competition.

Notable Quote:

• Ryan: "You can lose the bet and still get 50 bucks."

This segment not only showcases their playful competitiveness but also invites listeners to participate through prize picks using a promo code, blending entertainment with interactive elements.

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Patron Questions: Leveraging Rewards and Real Estate Marketing

Timestamp: 27:00 – 36:10

Transitioning to listener engagement, Jared presents questions from patrons, prompting the hosts to offer creative solutions.

Key Topics:

1. Redeeming Leverage Points:

   • Patron: "Bucker9000. I feel like I've built up a lot of leverage with the old battle ax. What are some fun ways I could redeem those leverage points?"
   • Hosts humorously suggest redeeming points for personal favors, eventually advising leveraging them for major events like golf trips or hunting excursions.

2. Real Estate Marketing Ideas:

   • Patron: "I'm a Realtor and always hand out tchotchkes in the beer tent of my hometown festival. In years past, I've done koozies and golf balls, but need a better idea."
   • Tyler recommends using free beer as a marketing tool, proposing handing out personalized beers to attract potential clients and foster conversations about real estate.

Notable Quotes:

• Tyler: "Everyone likes the guy that gives you free beer."
• Miles: "Every referral you give me, I'll give you a free beer."

These exchanges highlight the hosts' knack for blending humor with practical advice, providing valuable insights for their entrepreneurial listeners.

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Style and Friendship: Sweatpants and Hockey Jerseys

Timestamp: 36:00 – 43:00

A light-hearted discussion ensues about fashion choices, specifically addressing a friend who consistently wears sweatpants and a hockey jersey. The hosts explore the dynamics of friendship and style influence.

Discussion Highlights:

• Tyler and Miles debate whether such attire signifies a lack of style or simply a personal choice.
• They humorously consider strategies to help their friend diversify his wardrobe, ensuring it remains a matter of personal expression rather than embarrassment.

Notable Quotes:

• Tyler: "Maybe he's trying to close with women and his buddies. Not being a great wingman."
• Miles: "You got to be with the guy the jersey is wearing though, too."

This segment underscores the balance between accepting friends as they are and encouraging positive changes in a supportive manner.

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Neighborhood Annoyances: Driving and Construction

Timestamp: 43:00 – 58:00

The conversation shifts to shared grievances about neighborhood nuisances, such as speeding drivers and ongoing construction.

Key Points:

• Ryan expresses frustration with a slow-moving school bus that frequently halts traffic: "Why are his buddies on his baby?"
• Tyler and Miles share similar pet peeves, including fast drivers like the Domino's delivery person and incessant home renovations disrupting peace.

Notable Quotes:

• Miles: "It's getting close, though. We're getting close."
• Ryan: "It's a nitpick because I really don't have a neighborhood with."

These relatable anecdotes resonate with listeners facing similar local challenges, fostering a sense of community and shared experience.

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Trivia and Toilet Paper Origins

Timestamp: 58:00 – 71:03

In a surprising twist, Jared shares an informative segment on the history of toilet paper, juxtaposed with humorous banter about its early, less refined predecessors.

Discussion Highlights:

• Jared provides a brief history: "Most early toilet paper was made from untreated wood pulp... people used corn cobs, hay, moss, wool shells, and even old newspapers."
• The hosts humorously reflect on the discomfort and impracticality of these early methods, leading to a more engaging conversation about modern conveniences.

Notable Quotes:

• Jared: "The first widely available toilet paper in the US came from Joseph Getty in the 1850s."
• Ryan: "He was just getting splinters in his ass. Dude, how did the industry even survive?"

This segment combines factual information with the hosts' signature humor, making learning entertaining for the audience.

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Closing Discussions and Future Plans

Timestamp: 71:03 – 73:37

As the episode nears its end, the hosts engage in playful hypotheticals about basketball matchups and future podcast plans.

Key Topics:

• Summer Basketball Series:

  • The team plans a "summer series" of basketball games, setting up friendly competitions and teasing future interactive content for patrons.

• Final Banter:

  • The discussion wraps up with humorous exchanges about potential game outcomes, emphasizing camaraderie and the ongoing fun among hosts.

Notable Quotes:

• Jared: "Would you rather lose to Ryan in a game of one on one basketball or lose to Charlie in a game of golf?"
• Miles: "I have been stumped."

Conclusion: The episode concludes with an invitation to listeners to join their Patreon for exclusive content, reinforcing community engagement and support.

Final Quote:

• Miles: "May your cobs be corned hold. And may your wife not shame you about making friends. That you talk to someone for 10 minutes, they are your friend. And that's what we believe. Cheers, guys."

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Takeaways and Insights

• Gender Dynamics: The episode explores how men and women approach friendships differently, suggesting that women may be more discerning and cautious in forming bonds.

• Entrepreneurial Spirit: Jared’s chapstick idea and the subsequent discussions highlight the hosts' innovative thinking and willingness to entertain unconventional business concepts.

• Community and Relatability: Through shared stories about neighborhood annoyances and practical advice on marketing, the hosts create a relatable atmosphere that resonates with their Midwest audience.

• Humor with Substance: Balancing humor with informative segments, such as the history of toilet paper, the hosts maintain an engaging and entertaining dialogue throughout the episode.

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Conclusion

Episode #321 of You Betcha Radio skillfully blends humor, personal anecdotes, and thoughtful discussions on gender dynamics and entrepreneurial ideas. With memorable quotes and a laid-back Midwest charm, Miles, Ryan, Tyler, and Jared create a captivating listening experience that both entertains and engages their audience.

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For more in-depth conversations and exclusive content, listeners are encouraged to join You Betcha Radio on Patreon.

Transcript

[Miles]

Welcome back to another episode of the you Bet yout Radio podcast. The coldest podcast in all the Midwest. I am Miles, you Bet you guy here with Ryan the T shirt guy. We are live. The boys are ready to rock and roll. And Jared, our boy, our guy, the. The glass man. He's a new homeowner.

[Ryan]

Hey.

[Miles]

He's a 00 times confirmed sex haver. He's a married man with a tree attendant.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

He stands at 5, 10.

[Jared]

You got it.

[Miles]

5, 10.

[Tyler]

He loves eating Chinese food the day before half marathon. Don't bring it up.

[Miles]

Why is that making.

[Ryan]

He got mad at me last time.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Jared the Glass man, ladies and gentlemen, has a proposed million dollar idea for us today.

[Jared]

So I think this will fulfill my retirement of this year with this idea.

[Tyler]

Just this year?

[Jared]

Well.

[Tyler]

Oh yeah.

[Miles]

Your.

[Ryan]

Your New Year's evolution.

[Tyler]

Duh.

[Jared]

So everybody uses chapstick. Most everybody.

[Miles]

I don't use chapstick.

[Ryan]

Ryan uses chapstick for two people, so he covers Jake.

[Miles]

Jake also used chapstick. Do you use chapstick?

[Ryan]

I use Chapstick very regularly, but then I lose the chapstick within a couple days, so. So I. I hit it hard for like three days and I lose the chapstick.

[Miles]

Got it.

[Tyler]

Hang on. Let's back up for a second. I rarely ever use chapstick.

[Ryan]

You talk. You've talked to me about you using Chapstick.

[Miles]

Talk about that. You always need a chapstick in your truck.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I have it in my truck, but I rarely ever use it. So, like in dire time. In like dire times.

[Ryan]

We for sure have audio of Ryan talking about chapstick on Patreon.

[Miles]

Someone will pull a tape. We'll move on.

[Tyler]

You can pull it. I never said I.

[Miles]

So all the time. Not great so far. He says he doesn't use it all the time. I never use it. And Tyler says uses it maybe how many days out of the year?

[Ryan]

32.

[Miles]

One month out of the year. Now, with that information, I will agree. There is a portion of the population that uses chapstick.

[Ryan]

My wife uses it all the time.

[Jared]

There we go.

[Miles]

My wife uses it all the time.

[Tyler]

My wife does too.

[Jared]

So does mine. So I think what my idea is really premium chapstick ingredients. So we make like one of the best chapsticks in the world, but we make everything translucent, including the casing and the chapstick itself. Like the wax. Whatever reason being is. So people lose it and then they have to buy more of our chapstick.

[Miles]

Okay. All right.

[Ryan]

That's going to Be really? Because I lose the regular shit that's not translucent. I'll own that one for three hours, not three days.

[Jared]

But we're going to make premium ingredients.

[Miles]

That would suck. I would never find it.

[Jared]

Yeah, that's my idea.

[Ryan]

It's completely crystal clear.

[Miles]

Why do we need premium ingredients?

[Jared]

So people keep coming back like, God.

[Miles]

That'S like, it's got to be the best chapstick they've ever had in their life. And they just have to deal with the fact that it's in a clear tube.

[Ryan]

How about. How about this? We put trace amounts of nicotine in the chapstick.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So they. People start tweaking out like they do. And they lose their jewel.

[Tyler]

Cuz.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Like, if my lip is cracked in the corner, I mean, that's instant nicotine straight into the bloodstream.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Miles]

That actually is maybe a better idea than your original one is nicotine chapstick.

[Jared]

I used to have the sunflower seed idea with nicotine.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Because that's like a classic replacement to nicotine is sunflower seeds. Why not put a low dose in the seeds?

[Miles]

I'll just put a dose.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

Full dose.

[Jared]

That could be a too.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

We could branch out if the cells are down.

[Miles]

This is definitely better than your air mail idea.

[Ryan]

Significantly.

[Miles]

It's gonna be hard to advertise.

[Ryan]

I mean, that's true.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Call a spade. Tough to advertise a product you can't see.

[Jared]

Word of mouth is the best advertisement, though.

[Miles]

Yeah. And they quite literally will be using it on their mouth.

[Ryan]

And then when people start to get upset that it's translucent and they're losing, it was like, we do this because we have nothing to hide. That's how good these ingredients are.

[Jared]

Or we could sell it even more premium chapstick that has like a stripe on it. Like one singular stripe.

[Tyler]

Yeah. So now we're going more premium.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

So like, even better ingredients than the one that we just talked about.

[Jared]

But like, I don't know. Spearmint in it. I don't know.

[Ryan]

Oh, could be.

[Jared]

I don't know.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And we could have a camo chapstick and we only sell it in rural areas.

[Miles]

I mean, basically your plan with this chapstick is just do the fire fest and just be like, we promise there's chapstick in my hand right now.

[Jared]

It's the greatest.

[Miles]

You can't see it. It's the greatest thing ever. But I promise it's the best chapstick you've ever had. And you'd be Going like this. And there would be chapstick in your hand. You can't see it.

[Jared]

Yeah. I originally want to do like a. Was a chameleon, how it changes with its original. Had that idea, but I thought that'd be too expensive to investigate that.

[Ryan]

Technology Smart.

[Miles]

Yeah. I wanted to train chameleons to spit out chapstick whenever you need it.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

We don't want to be running a chameleon slaughterhouse either. Grab their skin from them.

[Jared]

Yeah. So I thought, all right, translucent's better. Cheaper.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, I don't hate it. It's maybe $1,000 idea.

[Jared]

That's pretty good. I'll take that.

[Miles]

It's better than air. Way better than air was a $1 idea.

[Ryan]

Air mail was an idea.

[Miles]

It was just an. Yeah, you're right.

[Tyler]

It would be a great product to give out for free. Free, though, to get people to, like, understand how good it actually is. Because they're going to lose it and then they're going to have to come back and actually buy one.

[Jared]

Yeah, I've seen that marketing. Marketing wise, I've seen some people, like, they'll give out free water and just put ads on them. So we can maybe start by doing that and then branch out a little more.

[Tyler]

So you're trying to put ads from other people, Other people's business.

[Jared]

Yep.

[Tyler]

Even though it's translucent.

[Jared]

So right away we will.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's just to start. We'll put it in the little package you get at charity scrambles.

[Miles]

Well, what we need to be focusing all our energy on and is how to get people more people with chapped lips, whether that's more wind tunnels, you know, having food advertisements that look absolutely delicious so they have to lick their lips on a windy day.

[Ryan]

Well, we could just use this company also with our sunflower seed company with nicotine. Make them extra salty and nicotini.

[Miles]

Yeah. Chap it up. Yeah.

[Jared]

I don't hate that.

[Miles]

So. Yeah, I like that kind of.

[Jared]

Jared, I think it's got legs.

[Ryan]

Hey. Every idea you have has been getting better and better.

[Jared]

I think. I think you like this idea the most out of all. All of my ideas.

[Miles]

I would say I do like it the most. It was out of the. It was out of this. The tube thinking.

[Tyler]

And you're being genuine about how much you like it. Not just because he's a new homeowner now. So you.

[Miles]

I said it was $1,000.

[Tyler]

Okay, sure.

[Jared]

It's a lot of money.

[Ryan]

Sure. So you're willing to invest $1,000 is what you're saying I would give Jared.

[Miles]

000 if he could promise me that he came back with a completely translucent chapstick. Yes.

[Ryan]

With the best. The best chaps.

[Miles]

And the deal I would make is, I will give you $1,000 if you can promise me that if you can't follow through, you have to give me $10,000. And then we'll see if. If he put his money where his chapped mouth is.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

You have to come in now we're.

[Ryan]

In the idea stage.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jared]

It's not chapstick. It's an experience. You know, that's kind of what I'm thinking.

[Miles]

It's a lifestyle.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

It's huge. With magicians.

[Miles]

That is.

[Jared]

Hit that market.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Miles]

Well, thanks for sharing, Jared. No problem. Yeah. If there's anyone listening, I'd like to invest or think it's a good idea, let us know. One thing I forgot to talk to you guys about last week after being in on vacation in Cambodia in the bodes. So I was on vacation. I was sitting in the pool by myself because my wife was back in the room with our napping kids. So I got a little couple hours of free time for myself. So I was in the pool, just chilling out, maxing, relaxing, all cool, shooting some B ball outside the school.

[Ryan]

Was that one of the schools Ryan built? Nice.

[Miles]

Yeah. So I'm just chilling in the pool, and a guy comes out to me. It was the most guy interaction I've ever had in my life. He walks up to me as I'm sitting in the pool. He doesn't say hello. He doesn't say hi. He just walks up to me and says, you've been playing any golf? That was the intro. No, hey, what's going on? None of that. And I proceeded to talk to this guy. His name is Rob. I found out later, like, right at the end, it was classic. We just talk about golf, talk about vacation. He's like, oh, my name's Rob, by the way. Like, as you. You just got.

[Tyler]

You hopped into it right away.

[Miles]

And I find out that Rob is on his baby moon with his wife.

[Ryan]

Nice.

[Miles]

And so I was like, oh, that's cool. What are you guys planning on doing while you're here? And he goes, oh, I'm gonna go play some golf with some buddies tomorrow. I was like, rob, how do you pull that off? He's like, wow, I'm gonna hang out with her tonight.

[Jared]

Logical.

[Miles]

And then I tried to sound really cool in front of my new friend Rob. He's like, because I like, oh, I come to Cambodia like all the time. You know, it's crazy here. Like for generations been coming here. Dual citizenship on the way. Yeah, the whole thing. And so he's like, you know any good Mexican restaurants that we can get some food? Is that so funny?

[Ryan]

Because you're gonna, you're pretending like, you know, like, actually there's a really great place. It's John's down the street. They have great talk.

[Miles]

Well, no, so then I was like, I was like, oh, oh yeah, Mexican restaurant. You're gonna want to. And the thing that made me sound like I was super cool is I started using road names.

[Tyler]

Yep, yep.

[Miles]

Started using road names to tell them where it was at. So I was like, yeah, you're going to want to go to Las Consuelas. You want to get out on BOB Hope, go 111 right over there. He's like, okay. It was like, but if you want more like a modern Mexican restaurant feel, you're going to want to go to Mole down on El Paso Drive. He's going to hop out on Monterey, just head south right there. And he looks me square in the eyes and goes, dude, I'm just going to Uber there. So all of my cool sounding lingo of knowing where stuff was in this area just was. Fell on deaf ears. He was just like, stop telling me the road names.

[Jared]

Got me a pen?

[Miles]

Yeah, I'll just, I'm just going to yelp it and then get directions there from there.

[Jared]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

I think you still sounded cool for a second.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah. But you sounded cool right away. And then he kept going.

[Miles]

Yeah. Then he's like, okay, yeah, fucking tool.

[Ryan]

If you just told them what street it was on, that was probably enough.

[Tyler]

Or just the name of the restaurant.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

And why it was good.

[Miles]

You know, probably just golf, but yeah. Rob is a great, great guy. The only thing I know about him is he's a two handicap, golf wise.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah, Rob.

[Tyler]

Five or six.

[Miles]

He's kind of a semi retired golf caddy back home in Philly and that his wife is pregnant and all of that.

[Tyler]

Did you, did you say congrats on the sex?

[Miles]

I didn't. I. I did.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

It was a little early for that. Sure. Yeah.

[Tyler]

You didn't know if that was like, cool at the tire. Yeah. Too early.

[Ryan]

I think that's a great tester joke.

[Miles]

A lot of, a lot of jokes about how my golf game's gone to ever since I had a kid. And so it was a classic keep your handicap low while you can. My guy. But yeah. I don't know how Rob was able to pull off golfing two or three times with his golf buddies on his baby moon. But whatever he's doing, he's crushing it.

[Ryan]

Why are his buddies on his baby?

[Miles]

Well, I knew a guy that was in the area that he was meeting up with.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

So anyways, great interaction, great time. I was fully relaxed, went back to the room, talking to Anne. I was like, hey, and I made a new friend. And she was like, did you actually make a new friend or did you just talk to someone? And I was very confused. I was like, what is the difference? Apparently to guys. Because to guys, like, guys view a conversation as. That guy's my friend now.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Especially if it's a positive conversation.

[Miles]

Right. It's. It's. I was appalled that she was questioning whether or not Rob and I were friends just because we had a 10 minute conversation. Well, I mean, like, what do I gotta do? Like, get his whole life story, FaceTime his mom and say hello. I mean, for me, you're a friend of mine. If. If I see you, I'm gonna have a conversation with you. And if I just saw Rob, will I see Rob again? Probably not. But if I do see Rob, I will stop and have a conversation with him. And to me, that's friend for life.

[Ryan]

And you'd be happy about it.

[Tyler]

I was gonna say if you had. If you had crossed paths with him like say the next day or even later that day, you'd have cracked a joke at him or something or whatever. No, it wasn't the end. It wasn't the end of you guys.

[Miles]

Did Bobby, did you shoot low this morning?

[Jared]

How.

[Tyler]

How low did you go?

[Miles]

Yeah. Then we would adapt up and. And then my wife would have been just standing there completely jealous.

[Tyler]

Yeah. That you had a new friend. She.

[Ryan]

I think that's really why she was. She was busting your balls. She didn't make any friends.

[Miles]

That's probably true.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. I mean, is it harder for women to just naturally make friends on the spur of a moment like that? Is that the difference between guys and girls is. Can just. We're friends.

[Ryan]

Definitely in my.

[Miles]

Takes a little bit more time for girls to warm up to each other.

[Ryan]

Definitely in my relationship that, that is the norm. It's way easier for me to make. Make friends with someone than my wife. Like, she, like she needs to hang out with them multiple times to consider them her friend.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Why?

[Tyler]

Why is that?

[Ryan]

I don't know, trust thing? I think it's. We have A brotherhood.

[Miles]

Is it because women are smarter than men?

[Ryan]

Potentially.

[Miles]

Right. Like, we'll just. I. I just assume Rob's a great guy.

[Tyler]

Yeah. You don't even.

[Miles]

I don't know if he's in a drug cartel, got a body in his truck, but to me, he's a great guy. And if my wedding was coming up, I would have been like, if you want to swing through, come on through.

[Tyler]

Yeah, quick round.

[Miles]

And women are just smarter than us, so they, like, have their guard up, be like, well, this person could be a serial killer.

[Ryan]

That's a very fair point. Like, you don't know if Rob told you the truth one time.

[Miles]

No, no, I don't. But he talked about golf to start, and people who golf are trustworthy.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, that's what my grandpa would say. Like, oh, he's a golfer. Yeah. You can trust him with your life.

[Tyler]

And, you know, if he was trying to, like, recruit you into, like, a pyramid scheme or something, he would have had to give you the pitch. Like, at the end of the conversation, he would have finally had to reveal, like, yeah, right. Want to join Amway?

[Miles]

If he was going to scheme me, would have done it in that conversation.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But he did, right?

[Tyler]

He didn't.

[Jared]

By the way, I'm a Scientologist.

[Tyler]

Okay. Yes, exactly.

[Miles]

Well, no. Then I would have been like, no.

[Tyler]

You'D have been intrigued.

[Miles]

Okay. I was like, well, but it's like, everyone. You need to have a plethora of guys, and it's like, that's a hole in my guy game. Like, hey, I got a guy for this. I got a guy for that. I don't have a Scientology guy. So that would have been nice to acquire a Scientology guy that I could reference.

[Ryan]

Yeah. We would have had someone that we could text whenever we talk about Scientology on the podcast.

[Miles]

Correct. Yeah.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

How's Tom Cruise doing?

[Ryan]

Hashtag Stump.

[Miles]

He called them tc.

[Jared]

That's true.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Scientology trivia.

[Tyler]

He called him T Boy.

[Miles]

But, yeah, I think that women are just smarter, and so they have their guard up a little bit more and need a little more time to ensure that someone has got some good character. I don't know.

[Ryan]

They're just way more. They're more careful than us.

[Tyler]

And I think if.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's like, we'll just. We'll just run and jump and do something and think about the consequences as you're doing it, where they're gonna be like, yeah, that doesn't seem like a good idea. It's like the classic meme that there's a reason why women live longer than men. And then it's a video of a guy. I watched a video of a guy. It's a perfect example of this. He found, like, he had a drill with, like, a little, like, wheel on the end, and he was laying down on, like, the mechanics roller thing. You'd slide underneath to, like, change your oil or something. Yeah, you slide underneath the car. He was laying belly first, holding the drill, and he was. He was holding it full go. And it was spinning him around. And he's going fast and fast and fast, faster and faster. And, you know, that's why women live longer. Men, they're more careful. Yeah.

[Tyler]

I also feel like if women are gonna meet somebody new, they usually meet them through a friend that they know really well.

[Miles]

Yeah. They get more referrals.

[Tyler]

Yes. Yes. Well, we're kind of just flying by the seat of our pan, like, if. If we just run into somebody who we have no mutual friends in. Let's spark a conversation. Oh, you like golf? Me too.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Because if Anne would have been cool that you totally would have gone golfing.

[Miles]

With Rob that day, I probably would.

[Tyler]

You probably.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

He did. He invite. Did he. Was his tea time fuller. Did he throw it?

[Miles]

He was an invite to another thing, so I don't think I was gonna get the invite. I would have been the. The invite from the invite.

[Ryan]

If you would have seen him the next day, though.

[Miles]

Yeah, well, I maybe would have been like, hey, you want to maybe just pop over the course right here for nine later? Yeah, but it was already, like, 5:00.

[Ryan]

At night, so twilight round, cheaper.

[Miles]

So. Yeah. Yeah, I think. Well, and it's. It's probably goes back back to our ancestral roots of being hunter gatherers, in that, like, you see another tribe out there, you're gonna need to go talk to them, check them out, and you're gonna need to make friends with them or they may try and kill you. Whereas, you know, the. The back in the cave, the. The women were, you know, more protective of the family in there. And so I think that's part of it.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Instinctual.

[Miles]

We were natural salesmen back in the day.

[Ryan]

Cave to cave, cave to cave salesman.

[Tyler]

You had another new friend of yours you just had to part ways from, like, your old golfing buddy? I just didn't want to bring it.

[Miles]

Up, but I just can't make any lasting. Well, no, we're still friends. Actually. That guy texted me the other day.

[Tyler]

Nice. So she said, like, still doesn't live.

[Jared]

Here anymore, but he's actually making new friends.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

He's like, hey, I just. Random question. You ever meet this guy named Rob in Cambodia? I just. He's awesome.

[Miles]

What if we. What if that was, like, actually a triangle? Like, we all knew each other. I mean, wild.

[Ryan]

Holy.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Going on a golfing trip.

[Tyler]

So did you try.

[Miles]

That's. That's what just. It's one thing I love about guys is our ability to be able to make friends over some of the dumbest, seemingly innocent stuff.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

We just. That day, we just happened to both be in a pool, and I don't know if I had the look on my face that I like to golf or maybe a certain tan line where my forehead or what, but he just knew.

[Ryan]

Did you have the white hand from your glove?

[Miles]

No, I take my glove off in between shots. I can't stand a sweaty glove.

[Jared]

Had a tea in your ear?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I was reading Golf Digest, but I.

[Ryan]

Had a scorecard in my hand in the hot tub.

[Miles]

I was still wearing my polo.

[Ryan]

This was at a golf course?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. When I say pool, I meant I was fishing my ball out of the pond, so.

[Ryan]

Yeah. You're doing any golfing?

[Miles]

No, just mostly fishing for my balls.

[Tyler]

Is there anything that. With you guys obviously being like, you know, before.

[Miles]

Before I move on, the one quirky thing about Rob is he, like, came up from underwater at some point, but by the time I talked to him, his hair was still, like, matted down. Like, you know, you got, like. He had short hair, but, you know, you come up with water, and you kind of, like, get it out of your face. Yeah, his. He did not. I think he just came straight up like an alligator. And so his hair was just straight down on his forehead. But then there was, like, the tiniest little part. Right. And so for, like, the first two minutes, I was just staring at his hair, just wondering, like, did I just, like. You know, sometimes you see people that you just want to, like, brush their hair back for them.

[Tyler]

He just had water still dripping down his face halfway to the conversation. Didn't even wipe his eyes.

[Miles]

His eyes are just red from chlorine.

[Ryan]

Comes out of the wild. Play mermaids.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah. He just had the little tiny goggles on through the whole conversation.

[Miles]

He's got flippers and goggles on his hair. The little matted mini hair part.

[Tyler]

He's got skull cap on still.

[Miles]

I didn't have the heart to tell Ann about the hair, because then she'd be like, wow, you are. That's strange. But I just. I couldn't get past it for the first two minutes. Luckily I did, though. Kudos to me, because now we're friends. And now if I saw him again, I give him about his hair because we're good buddies.

[Jared]

Oh, so you fixed your hair?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

Did you send them out or did you give him, like, exchange email addresses or anything?

[Miles]

No. God, no.

[Tyler]

Sure.

[Miles]

We're not women.

[Tyler]

Maybe you wanted to keep in touch. Maybe you're headed out to Philly here soon.

[Miles]

If we're meant to stay in touch, we'll run into each other again.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Did you ask him, like, ask me anything about. About Philly. Like, hey, like, if I ever get to Philly, like, where's the best place to get cheesesteak at?

[Miles]

No, I. I respected him.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Miles]

To not make fun of his homeland like that.

[Tyler]

Well, I don't think I. I think it's more of an honor. They have best cheesesteaks.

[Ryan]

You gave him Mexican recommendations. You gave him Cambodian skin recommendation.

[Miles]

It would have been nice if he would have reciprocated, telling me where I can get a good cheese steak in Philly.

[Jared]

Go to Pats.

[Ryan]

And he started listen off street names. And he'd been like, dude, I'm gonna Uber.

[Miles]

I'm gonna Uber.

[Jared]

Ben Franklin Drive.

[Miles]

It was nice to make Ann jealous that I made a friend. She didn't.

[Ryan]

Poor Anne.

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah, poor Anne. She was on vacation and.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Soaking up the sun.

[Tyler]

Yeah, she's probably like it. You're gonna say, I'm watch. You're gonna sit back and watch the kid, and I'm gonna go out and meet friends.

[Miles]

Yeah, she. No, she did the same thing. Same pool and everything. No friends.

[Jared]

So it's like fishing.

[Miles]

Yeah. Except for I found the honey hole. I got a Rob.

[Ryan]

His name was Rob.

[Miles]

I. I still this day don't know if it's 1B or 2B's, but I think that's like a second conversation type of topic.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It all depends on if he's a Robert or not or if his parents went real weird and just named him Rob. Straight up.

[Tyler]

Does he go by Bobby again?

[Miles]

Second conversation type stuff, Ryan, it's too bad I don't have a mental list of stuff that I need to ask Rob when I run into him. Okay, So I will put that on the list.

[Tyler]

Good.

[Miles]

So you going with, like, Bobby or two B's? One B.

[Tyler]

Okay. Bobby. When you're young, you just transition to rob if you're 21.

[Jared]

Or I'll call you 2B.

[Tyler]

You get into some when you're younger. And you had to switch your name from Bobby to Rob anything like that. York for Amway.

[Ryan]

Guys, it is Masters week, and you bet your radio is throwing a lineup down on the Masters with prize picks. Use code YBR and get 50. $50 instantly when you use your first $5 lineup, Brian, that's 50 free dollars.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it's, It's. It's free money. And I don't think there's a bigger weekend in sports outside of the super bowl than Masters week in golf.

[Ryan]

You want to know the best part about the. The $5 bet to win $50?

[Tyler]

Please enlighten me.

[Ryan]

You can lose the bet and still get 50 bucks.

[Tyler]

Holy smokes.

[Ryan]

So obviously your boys are putting a lineup in. My pick, I think is a shoe in. I really like the lines of holes played because it's basically who's going to make the cut or not. So, Cam Young, to make the cut. Easy peasy.

[Tyler]

You picked the very first one under the holes. Played tab.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

You just. You looked at the very first where you're like this.

[Ryan]

No, I, I scrolled all the way through it. Tom Hoagie is the last one. Really? Go see who the last one is.

[Tyler]

Tom Hoagie is not the last one. But speaking of Tom Hogie, that's going to be my pick for this week. I'm going to go Tom hoagie. More than 36.5 holes play.

[Ryan]

He's making the cut, folks.

[Tyler]

Fargo native also. Yeah. Hometown boy.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Little local blood. Ryan or Miles and Jared are in Nashville, but they sent us their picks. Jared Self, admittedly, knows absolutely nothing about golf, so that means his pick will probably be the one right?

[Tyler]

One, probably.

[Ryan]

He's got round one. Bryson DeChambeau. More than 71 and a half strokes.

[Tyler]

Okay. And I don't. I, you know, I don't mind that. Granted, it's a 50.50 chance of hitting that bet. I don't mind it, though.

[Ryan]

I think. I think I'm. I am a betting man. I think Jared's dead wrong. But watch him be the only one, right? Miles, on the other hand, has another really good golfer playing bad. Jon Rahm. Less than four birdies. Okay, four birdies is a lot to.

[Tyler]

Get in Augusta, so, yeah, Augusta national conditions aren't the greatest. I don't know what they're going to be like on Thursday, but who knows? As the two, you know, golf connoisseurs in this office, this lineup is. It's fatable. I'll just say that right now.

[Ryan]

You could fade it. You very well could fade it, it's very fatable. Or you could ride with us, you could trust our guts.

[Tyler]

You could die with us too.

[Ryan]

And you should also use promo code YBR for $50 after your first five dollar bet. Go do it.

[Miles]

All right, Jared, we got some patron questions for, for the listeners. We do now I want to remind everyone that we have a [e-mail] you bet you radio. We post an extra episode every week over there on Patreon. You have access to the PCAs, you have the access to the wives episode. You have access to Ann on or that was on here.

[Jared]

Road trippers.

[Miles]

Road trippers. And just this last week, you will have full behind the scenes access to Ryan and I's summer series of basketball. The summer series, it's gonna be electric. So patron question prompted a who would win in the basketball game? Me or Ryan or something like that. And so the bet is on. We're going to play a best of three series. We're going to play three basketball games, one on, one to 11.

[Tyler]

Call your own fouls, twos and ones.

[Miles]

Twos and ones to 11.

[Ryan]

Jared's refing.

[Jared]

No, I'm not.

[Miles]

Call your own fouls. Each guy will get to pick a site that we get to do it at. And the third one will be decided by you guys or the Patriots.

[Ryan]

Yeah, you guys, not the Patriots.

[Tyler]

We'll be back at Cambodia.

[Ryan]

We need, if we need a third game, Jared and I will pick it.

[Miles]

Yeah, we won't need it, but if needed.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I don't think we will.

[Miles]

But I, I gotta let my game do the talking. And we're gonna play one game in June, one game in July and if needed, one game in August. So it's. The summer series allows enough time for the boys to recoup in between each game.

[Jared]

Ice.

[Miles]

Cuz we want us to be at our peak.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I want your best every. Every game.

[Miles]

And so that was decided last Patreon episodes. If you'd like to listen to that conversation, you can go check that out last week. But probably the games will get posted over there on Patreon. Absolutely.

[Tyler]

So yeah, well, we're gonna mic the net up too and we're gonna put.

[Ryan]

A shotgun mic on the rim.

[Miles]

So you're gonna get a lot of when I'm shooting and a lot of when Ryan's shooting.

[Tyler]

Well, I'm gonna pick a. My site is going to be with a chain net, so. Ching. Yeah, it's gonna be good.

[Miles]

It's hard to do a chain net sound anyways.

[Ryan]

Sounds good.

[Miles]

Guys, guys. A lot of stuff going over on Patreon, so go check that out. Without any further ado, Jared, you got some patrons questions from us? For us.

[Jared]

Bucker9000. I feel like I've built up a lot of leverage with the old battle ax. What are some fun ways I could redeem those leverage points?

[Miles]

Not giving us a lot to go off of. We knew some interests that you were interested in.

[Ryan]

Hey, I mean, you just cash them in for sexual favors as fast as.

[Miles]

Possible, so that's when Tyler's got ahead of it. You can't be doing that, though. You got to hold up all your leverage till after your vasectomy.

[Ryan]

That's true. Yeah, that's true. I was going to say the kind I'm thinking. She can't get pregnant.

[Miles]

I. You know, when I think about building up leverage, it's usually for some major events. You know, golf, guys trip.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

Extra hunting trip. Maybe.

[Tyler]

Yep.

[Miles]

Maybe even just like a day by yourself.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Just.

[Tyler]

Those are. They're underrated.

[Miles]

They're.

[Tyler]

Especially at our. Our stage of life.

[Miles]

Yeah. It's like I'm to the point where if I can get one day where I can be by myself to do whatever I want, I'm fully on board with it.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Whereas like, you know, when you're younger, you're like, ah, like maybe I should call my buddies, go to the bar or whatever. And I'm just kind of like. Might be kind of nice just to just chill out.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I gotta. I've had like, I got a honey do list stacking up, putting pictures and on the wall. And I. I keep. I keep telling my wife, I say, just give me one day. Just give me one day by myself.

[Ryan]

Kill.

[Tyler]

The entire list will be done. And I get. That's kind of relaxing to me because I'm like, I'm not really. I ain't got.

[Miles]

So the problem that I have with that is when I do that, I don't get all the stuff done in one day. And so it's kind of a boy who cried wolf situation if I use that. So know. Make sure you get your list done in the day.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Or time. Yeah. Time each to do on that list. And just, you know. Yeah. The Stairway pictures took me two hours. Thought they'd take me a half hour.

[Miles]

Yeah. You have gotta have receipts. Yeah. There was a. There was an unexpected stud I had to deal with which took an extra 45 minutes.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Yeah. I couldn't find the screws.

[Tyler]

I didn't have a metal drill. Bit.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Disaster.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Come to find out we have metal studs in our house and not wood, so I had to go find a.

[Miles]

I think another thing you should build up leverage for in a marriage is big purchases.

[Ryan]

I was gonna say buying a toy.

[Miles]

Yep. Side by side. Maybe a dirt bike, if you're into that.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Night vision scope.

[Miles]

Zero. Turned mower.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Maybe just a shed in the backyard. Just build up leverage for all that. You want her when you purchase this thing to go. You know, he's probably earned this. That's what your goal is with the leverage.

[Tyler]

Yeah. New over under or something.

[Jared]

NFL Sunday ticket.

[Tyler]

Sunday ticket.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Doesn't have to be that crazy a purchase.

[Tyler]

Yeah. You get. Yeah. Upgrade to Amazon Prime. Amazon.

[Miles]

Yeah. Well, that's more for her than you.

[Tyler]

That's true.

[Miles]

The amount of boxes coming through the household. Yeah.

[Jared]

Miller Time. I need your marketing expertise. I'm a Realtor and always hand out tchotchkes in the beer tent of my hometown festival. In years past, I've done koozies and golf balls, but need a better idea.

[Miles]

Beer.

[Jared]

What you got?

[Miles]

It's a beer festival, right?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jared]

My hometown festival.

[Miles]

Beer done like.

[Ryan]

Like his own personalized cans. You're saying no, just regular beers.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I think a beer with a koozie, you can throw a koozie on it with your.

[Miles]

And this is what you do. You go. The festival told me that if you're gonna drink this beer, you have to do it in our tent. You can't be walking around with it.

[Jared]

That's good.

[Miles]

So then you make it look one, your tent's gonna be the busiest.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Two, they're gonna have to stick around and have conversations with you. You can get in your sly marketing terms that you already use, like, charming. And it has a lot of curb appeal. Say, you can say stuff like welcoming. You can say stuff like escrow. To really show them that, you know, you're talking about. And that's how you win them over. Just keep them in the tent.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

You talk about how it's. It's a.

[Ryan]

It's.

[Tyler]

I mean, it's definitely a buyer's market right now.

[Miles]

Yep. Say stuff like that.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I. I don't even know if it is, but say it.

[Ryan]

What is a chotchki?

[Miles]

Chotchki.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I think it's like a knickknack.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

Trinket swag. Stuff we all get. And the other beautiful thing about handing out free beer is the Michael Scott gum rule. Everyone likes the guy who gives you a piece of gum.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Everyone likes the guy that gives you free beer.

[Tyler]

And so everyone likes the guy.

[Miles]

A couple cases of beer costs what, 40 bucks?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Boom, there you go. 40 bucks in marketing rather than better than all the US USB drives that you hand out with your company logo on it.

[Ryan]

Thumbers bring back thumb drives or those.

[Tyler]

And like, who doesn't want to talk real estate over a beer, you know?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You have to if you're going to talk about this real estate market. Am I right?

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

I'll drink to that.

[Miles]

Yeah. There we go.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Jared]

You only get one free beer.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, it's like, it's like if they want a second beer, they have to plug in their like email and in there. Not bad. Yeah.

[Ryan]

You have to agree to be part of my list.

[Tyler]

Not a bad idea.

[Miles]

Every referral you give me, I'll give you a free beer.

[Jared]

Not bad.

[Miles]

Not bad. What's that, like a. Less than a buck, a buck a lead?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Not bad.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I mean if you like, if you, if, if you help them buy a house or. You know, I always get my, I always give my clients a case of beer when they close.

[Miles]

Yeah. There's 30 more coming after this.

[Jared]

But then wink at them.

[Miles]

There's 30 more where that came from. Not bad.

[Ryan]

Yeah, not bad.

[Miles]

Not bad.

[Jared]

Chief Queef, how do you tell your friend he has no style? When we go out, it's just sweatpants and a hockey jersey pretty much every time.

[Ryan]

What do you mean no style?

[Tyler]

I think I mean that, that's just, that's a type of style style.

[Miles]

It's a style style.

[Tyler]

It's not Queef style.

[Ryan]

But if you're in college, that's perfectly acceptable.

[Tyler]

I mean, the guy wearing sweatpants and a hockey jersey is probably listening to.

[Jared]

Chief Keef type of Gilmore.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. Did he say he was at college?

[Ryan]

I don't know, but I'm just saying.

[Miles]

I don't think so. That's the concerning part. You know, I feel like that is a very college esque outfit.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And once you start, you know, getting a real job and maybe all your friends start getting married, if you're still wearing sweatpants and a hockey jersey, that can be concern of some people. I'm not saying it's bad, but I can see where he's coming from.

[Ryan]

I respect it. He's. He's so unconcerned about what people think of him. He's just being himself.

[Miles]

Yeah. Maybe you need to look at yourself in the mirror. Why are you so concerned with your buddy's hockey jersey?

[Tyler]

Maybe he's trying to close with women and his buddies. Not being a great wingman. He's just kind of looks like he woke up off the couch.

[Ryan]

That makes a buddy look even better then.

[Miles]

Well, there's two ways it could be taken. You, you know, it's the, you know, effect where if you're around a lot of good looking people, you look better looking. But it also could be like the same effect where, like, he looks so not put together that you look put together. Or it's like I'm associating myself with the sweatpants hockey jersey guy.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Could be disastrous as well.

[Ryan]

I mean, you could just pretend like he's a make a Wish and you're just taking him out on his last hurrah. A Make a Wish adult in his hockey jersey.

[Miles]

I was going to say, I think you got to be with the guy the jersey is wearing though, too.

[Tyler]

Like some sort of celebrity status. That's how Mega wishes you were. Unless Chief Queef is like, the rapper.

[Jared]

Does he have clout?

[Tyler]

Yeah, you're just clout involved with Mega Wish. Maybe not. Maybe I'm wrong.

[Ryan]

We don't know if Chief Queef has make clout or not.

[Miles]

All right? If he wants some real advice, what he should do is you should. What you got to do is go like, hey, dude, we're going out tonight. It's like a whole theme thing. We're all wearing, like, jeans and a button down, so here you go, dude. Like, I'll be wearing it too. It's gonna be a whole funny thing, like, whatever. And then he shows up and no one else is wearing that, and he just looks good.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Bar. Bars have an office hoes and CEO night. You know, it's like.

[Miles]

I don't know.

[Ryan]

It's a theme for, like, parties.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Is it really?

[Miles]

I'm totally in the dark about.

[Tyler]

I brought it up once before.

[Ryan]

No, office hoes and CEOs is like a theme you would have at a college party.

[Tyler]

Yeah. The guys dress in, like, suits and.

[Ryan]

Yeah. And the chicks wear, like, white buttons.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan]

Is this people dressed like.

[Miles]

I never heard of that before.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Tyler]

Thank God you're here, Tyler. Yeah, yeah, that one would have flopped.

[Ryan]

Hey, I've been to one. What?

[Tyler]

What'd you wear?

[Ryan]

I just put a hockey jersey, a tie on, a collared shirt, and went.

[Tyler]

Tommy Hilfiger polo with a tie.

[Ryan]

Maybe. I don't know. I didn't have any nice clothes. I wasn't in the news yet.

[Tyler]

Gotcha. You know, I also don't think It's a bad thing that his buddy's dressing like that, because if you do start talking to the women, like, it's. It's kind of a good talking point, like what your buddy's wearing. Yeah. You can kind of poke fun and, like, you guys can make fun of him together for his outfit.

[Miles]

Yeah, I got. Hey, you know, I'm. I'm Miles or whatever. I'm here with my buddy, Connor McDavid.

[Tyler]

Well, you don't know.

[Miles]

Then we. Then you can know. You can see if she knows Puck too.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

If you're into Puck, great icebreaker.

[Ryan]

And if she's not into Puck, she might just believe that your buddy's a pro hockey player.

[Tyler]

Correct.

[Miles]

That's wearing sweatpants and his own jersey to the bar.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tyler]

But Conor McDavid could wear that to the bar.

[Ryan]

He could.

[Miles]

Actually, the one person who can wear that to the bar is Connor McDan.

[Tyler]

Correct.

[Miles]

Yeah, so that's. That's. It's a very good point, Ryan.

[Jared]

Thigh ticklers. What. What pisses you off about your neighborhood? Minus people driving fast down my street.

[Miles]

This guy's old.

[Ryan]

I get it, though.

[Tyler]

I do, too.

[Ryan]

Pissed me off in my old neighborhood.

[Tyler]

Dude, the Domino's guy used to speed down my road going 60. Jimmy John's.

[Miles]

What I've found is that you only start caring about that once you have a child.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Because I agree that there is sometimes, like, geez, that guy's going fast. And my kid can't even walk yet, you know? So I get it. Mine is that we don't have any trees because.

[Ryan]

Newer.

[Miles]

Just newer. Yeah, with the. The neighborhood was a field, you know, like, there wasn't trees here before even they even took down. And the other one is it just got a lot of construction going on. So to get out of the neighborhood, there's a lot of weaving back and forth in between trailers and guys with roller dogs walking across the street.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Honestly, I don't remember last time I was at your house where there wasn't like. Like an air nailer or something going. Putting shingles up on somebody's house. Yeah.

[Miles]

It's getting close, though. We're getting close.

[Ryan]

No, it's like every. Every summer when we try to shoot videos in your yard, there's a different house being put up near you. So we gotta, like, wait till their lunch break to start shooting our stuff.

[Miles]

Disaster.

[Jared]

Disaster.

[Tyler]

Also, like, the quality of Halloween candy's got to kind of piss you off in your neighborhood.

[Ryan]

It's just like your neighborhood is the.

[Miles]

Best if I'd have known I've been moving into a hidey tighty Halloween neighborhood. A Halloween hood. Yeah, I wouldn't. I don't know if I'd have pulled the trigger on that spot.

[Ryan]

Fucking full cans of Pringles.

[Miles]

Let's full cans of Pringles. Dumb.

[Ryan]

It's elite. It's elite.

[Miles]

No, not for.

[Tyler]

Not for Miles though. It makes them look bad. You got to do like Happy Meals or something. Keep them in like some sort of warmer.

[Jared]

Miles is the ugly friend standing next to his.

[Miles]

Like in this situation, I'm wearing a hockey jersey and a sweatpants to the Marx.

[Jared]

What is Halloween jersey?

[Ryan]

Next year get a hot dog roller.

[Miles]

Could do a hot dog roller. Or also like just go get the like 40 piece McNugget and just get like eight of those. Gotta be decently cheap as much as getting Pringle cans.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

And just start handing out McNuggets. That actually is a great idea.

[Tyler]

Well, like, like you could have. So Ann could be peering out the window and then she's like, all right, got a group coming. You hit the air fryer, start nuking them up a little and then you hand them out from there.

[Jared]

Not the air fryer though. Miles was like there.

[Ryan]

Yeah, Miles hates air fryer.

[Miles]

I would just have it over a heat lamp because they're already fried.

[Jared]

Gotta buy heat lamps.

[Miles]

Yeah, I would need a heat lamp. But I have been looking for a reason to buy a heat lamp. Not one. Like one that's kind of got that orange hue to it too.

[Tyler]

Oh yeah, you could buy a. You could get one of those. What are them pizza deals called?

[Miles]

Pizzazz.

[Tyler]

Do a pizzazz.

[Miles]

Yeah, I think it's gonna cook them too much.

[Ryan]

You'd have to just put it on upper instead of dual.

[Tyler]

You could just get a sunflower heater. Ice vision.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Give them a little propane flavor.

[Miles]

Little buddy heater.

[Ryan]

Yeah, Just set it right on the grates.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah. Tip it on its back. Yeah, they may. And they make little nugget bar would be great.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Come on in. Kids get to get your condiments.

[Tyler]

Yeah. They could come build their own Happy Meal. And then if you're looking to get rid of any of your kids toys, he's got like too many. Just.

[Miles]

Which he does.

[Tyler]

Yeah, Just put him at the end. Be like, hey, this is the toy for the Happy Meal. Take your pick.

[Miles]

But now I'm. Yeah. Anyways, playing their game now.

[Jared]

Then they win.

[Tyler]

I mean, I've only lived in my neighborhood for a little over A month. And I don't really. I don't live next to anyone.

[Ryan]

Right.

[Tyler]

Not to brag.

[Miles]

So there's gotta be some you're annoyed about.

[Tyler]

I'm annoyed about having to drive three miles of gravel every day, never have a clean pickup.

[Miles]

So I did move there.

[Ryan]

I mean, one thing.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I mean, I knew that was going to be the case. Like, it. Where? The location.

[Miles]

Yeah. What you got to do, Ryan?

[Tyler]

Location, location, location.

[Miles]

What you gotta do is get a vinyl on your truck, like the basketball, clean your shoes thing. And then once you get to the end of the gravel road, you just rip that clear coat off, and you got a clear coat, clean truck again.

[Tyler]

So, yeah, they. My wife has one of those, like, clear, like, bug. Bug shield deals. Like, on her hood. Like on the hood and then, like, all the way up to the end of the front tires. So, yeah, you could rip that baby off, it'd be squeaky clean. So they do make those. Not.

[Miles]

I'm not sure I know exactly what you mean. I know the one that, like, goes over the hood.

[Tyler]

Like, the bra. Or you're talking, like, the. No, this is, like a clear, like, vinyl thing that, like, sits on your. Like, pretty much on the front of your vehicle.

[Ryan]

It just makes it harder for bugs to, like, stick and, like, cake on.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Oh, I never even heard that. I've heard of the bra.

[Tyler]

Yeah, they gotta bring. People aren't utilizing bras enough on their vehicle.

[Miles]

We gotta bring back car bras.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I think my grandma used to have a bra on her, like, Pontiac Grand Dam or something back in, like, early 2000s. That thing was sick.

[Jared]

Yeah. Or you could spray WD40 all over your truck and no dirt will attach.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Also never rust either.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's true.

[Ryan]

I also don't really live in a neighborhood, but one thing that's been kind of just slightly pissing me off is when I leave for work, I get stuck behind the school bus, and I have to stop seven times while they pick up kids.

[Tyler]

You can't pass them?

[Ryan]

No, no.

[Tyler]

Like. Like in between stops.

[Ryan]

Yeah, because it's like. It's like 400 yards between stops. So it's like I'd have to punch it from dead stop the second the kid gets on the bus to pass them.

[Miles]

So, I mean, how much earlier you gotta leave?

[Ryan]

I don't know. It feels like. Because I don't leave at the same time every day, and it feels like they're waiting for me to start my car.

[Tyler]

Well, no, he's got the car started.

[Miles]

Yeah. All they gotta do is look the, the exhaust billowing out the, the window.

[Ryan]

In the garage and then they know.

[Miles]

That you're about to leave.

[Tyler]

He made it through the exhaust again. He's gonna be pulling out about two.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's a. I, I don't know how it happens. Like, I've left earlier, I've left later, and I always get stuck behind this damn bus. And it's the same like two mile stretch that I'm behind it by then it goes left and I go right and we're gone like fast and furious.

[Tyler]

You could, yeah, I could consider taking the ditch once the, once things dry up a little bit. You could take the ditch, Take the.

[Ryan]

Ditch on the kid's side of the.

[Tyler]

Bus again in between stops. You know where the stops are at by now you've been stuck behind. I do, yeah.

[Ryan]

It's just, it's just not enough time for me to get past the bus before they're slowing down again for stop number two.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

Or just enjoy it.

[Ryan]

Yeah. You know, I mean, like I said, it's a, it's a nitpick because I really don't have a neighborhood with like.

[Miles]

Neighborhood issues that would, you know, first couple times, whatever. But yeah, like the 15th time, dude.

[Ryan]

You'D be like, you gotta be, give me bus 29 again.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you just gotta get, you gotta get his number. Say, hey, give me a head 29. No, no, you gotta get the bus driver's phone number. Say, hey, in between stops, while you're driving, shoot me a quick text, let me know how close you are to my place. Just kidding. Don't do that.

[Jared]

Gavin Doggins, if you had to eliminate one of the following inventions, which would it be and why? Internet, airplanes, or bread?

[Miles]

Well, if we eliminate the Internet, we don't have a job.

[Jared]

Correct.

[Miles]

So I think we all have to be out on that.

[Ryan]

I think if we, if we didn't work and do what we do, I would say Internet. But since we do, I'm gonna say airplane.

[Miles]

Correct. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I was working for my dad.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. Like if I was still roofing, you were still concrete. And I feel I would very confidently say Internet.

[Miles]

Same. So. So we travel quite a bit, or at least I do. To have to drive everywhere would be tough, especially the long ones.

[Ryan]

You can't say bread. You love bread.

[Miles]

I know that. That's what I'm saying. It's tough.

[Jared]

But I think if we didn't have airplanes, we'd have like, like faster trains.

[Miles]

That is true. We'd find another Way to get their fast speed limits would be higher canals. Yeah. Hell, it say couldn't get there by helicopter.

[Ryan]

That's true.

[Tyler]

That is very true.

[Miles]

So I'll probably eliminate airplanes.

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's what I was gonna eliminate as well.

[Ryan]

Same.

[Tyler]

I mean, it would.

[Miles]

It would eliminate the elite saying, catch planes, not feelings. Yeah.

[Tyler]

So catch flights, not feelings.

[Miles]

Flights. Catch flights, not feelings.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I mean, we're talking like at that point, like, like caramel rolls, cinnamon rolls, Red Lobster buns.

[Ryan]

Gone. Dude.

[Tyler]

Texas Roadhouse.

[Miles]

It would be really tough.

[Tyler]

Country hearth, 12 grain.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Oh, God, that is elite, if you guys don't think.

[Miles]

I'm not committed to the bread life. I went on my way home, my kid was throwing up the other day, and so I had to pick up some Pedialyte. If that was going to do anything for a baby, I don't know.

[Ryan]

Helps them rehydrate after they.

[Miles]

So I picked up some Pedialyte and I asked my wife what else she wanted and she. And she said that she wanted me to pick up a loaf of bread, like Italian bread to eat with soup. And I was like, that's. That's why we're married. So I walked out of that store with a thing of Pedialyte and a loaf of bread.

[Tyler]

Hell yeah.

[Ryan]

Like, the dude is like, this guy is hungover.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like, what's going on?

[Tyler]

Yeah, he's like, oh, what do you got planned tonight?

[Miles]

Ah, 5:30pm And I'm still hungover.

[Ryan]

I just need something to soak up all the booze I had before I drove over here.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

If we didn't have bread too, like, then there are no sourdough moms. Like, the.

[Ryan]

I could be positive.

[Tyler]

The Internet is flooded with sourdough bombs right now.

[Miles]

Now I also got a buddy, a guy who's a sourdough guy.

[Tyler]

Really?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

I'll get you a starter.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, I can get. I can get one from him. I don't need you.

[Tyler]

Oh, okay.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I get. His is probably better.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Jared]

If there's no bread, like, what would people with celiac disease talk about all the time?

[Miles]

Correct. Or gluten free people?

[Ryan]

Oh, my God.

[Miles]

They would have no identity. Yeah, they just be tearing that away from them.

[Tyler]

Waiters and waitresses would love it, though, because you don't have to answer, like, is there glued in this Right.

[Miles]

Restaurants? Like, but we're talking. We have no Texas Roadhouse. We have no Red Lobster. We have no Olive Garden Panera.

[Tyler]

We still have them. They just take out the best parts of them.

[Miles]

No, but I'm. What I'm saying is they are nothing without their bread.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I mean, you could argue the peanuts at Texas Roadhouse kind of fall into place there, but they. They don't. That's not good.

[Jared]

Doesn't stack up.

[Ryan]

No. What are they going to give us in replacement of the. Of the cinnamon biscuits?

[Miles]

This is. You can't replace the joy of warm bread with butter on it. You can't replace that with anything.

[Tyler]

Now, everybody needs to know what it feels like to be completely full before your meal even gets correct.

[Ryan]

Before you get even five minutes.

[Miles]

What do you have to leave a restaurant, like, satisfied with the meal?

[Tyler]

Are you going to leave fucking gut stuffed? I'm taking the latter.

[Jared]

Herbs and girls.

[Miles]

Yeah. We got no guts.

[Tyler]

Yeah, we got no guts. Herbs and gerbs is out of business, correct.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

They're doing unwiches left and right.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Lettuce wraps. Ugh.

[Tyler]

Yeah. Vegan community with.

[Jared]

I don't know how to say this.

[Miles]

Also, I think bread is vegan.

[Ryan]

Pretty sure. Is it?

[Tyler]

Is it really?

[Miles]

Yeah. Yeah. I don't think the vegan community.

[Ryan]

It's got nothing to do with, like, animals whatsoever, I suppose. Yeah.

[Jared]

Anyways, Jared, I don't want to say this. Don puta catfish in a koi pond.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Jared]

Hashtag, done.

[Tyler]

Done. Put a catfish in a koi pond. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Old homeowners that we bought our last house from.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

Oh, that's the thing. Okay.

[Tyler]

I think that's the.

[Ryan]

I think it's gotta be. That's gotta be the reference.

[Tyler]

It's gotta be.

[Jared]

It's deep. Hashtag stunt miles.

[Tyler]

It was like a foot deep, but.

[Jared]

That'S still a pond.

[Miles]

Just let him read the question.

[Jared]

Hashtag stunt miles. What is the capital of Cambodia?

[Ryan]

Well, that's not where he stays.

[Miles]

I don't ever go there.

[Tyler]

Ouch.

[Miles]

And we just, like, fly onto an airstrip right on the beach, so I don't even fly into the city either. Capital of Cambodia.

[Jared]

It's the pearl of Asia. That's the. It's known as. Is the largest city in Cambodia. Tourism powerhouse. It says.

[Miles]

Oh, now I got it.

[Tyler]

The pearl of Malaysia.

[Jared]

Of Asia.

[Tyler]

Of Asia.

[Miles]

I don't know it.

[Jared]

I don't know how to say this. Non Pen. I think.

[Miles]

I mean, how was I gonna get that in a completely different language?

[Ryan]

You weren't gonna get it. Yeah.

[Miles]

Stumped. I mean, I'm just. I'm just turning into Lieutenant Dan here. Getting stumped after stumped.

[Ryan]

Logging business Miles is just stumps right now.

[Jared]

One fun Fact, most early toilet paper was made from untreated wood pulp. And the manufacturing process wasn't refined enough to remove all the tiny wood fragments. The first widely available toilet paper in the US came from Joseph Getty in the 1850s, but it was thick Medicaid sheets. By the late 1800s, companies like Scott Papers started rolling out actual toilet paper rolls. But the quality was still rough. It wasn't until Northern Tissue introduced splinter free toilet paper in 1935. Before, before toilet paper, people use corn cobs, hay, moss, wool shells, and even old newspapers.

[Miles]

So they were just getting splinters in their ass. Dude, how did the industry even survive? Who was buying that?

[Ryan]

Also, did you say corn cobs?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Instead of husks.

[Tyler]

I would assume that. I assume the kernels were like.

[Ryan]

But still, why not use the husk of the cord? It comes with its own toilet paper.

[Tyler]

But the cornhob was. Corn cob with no kernels is actually pretty soft. And you get, you get like, you get.

[Miles]

It's perfectly shaped to go in the crevice.

[Ryan]

It really is.

[Tyler]

There's a lot of. There's a. Probably 8 to 12 inches of real estate too. But it has to be perpendicular. It has to be perpendicular with your, your cavity.

[Ryan]

But I'm just saying, like if it's.

[Tyler]

Not, you got issues.

[Ryan]

If I have to wipe with corn, I'm. I'm more likely to head straight to the husk than I am. Is that why they call it cornhole cornfolio?

[Tyler]

Yeah, I mean like, you better make sure all kernels are off that thing.

[Miles]

We got a full spit tick out of.

[Jared]

Almost bursted everywhere over here.

[Ryan]

Okay. Also, splinters in your be all is something. Great band name, by the way.

[Jared]

It's like Butthole Surfers.

[Ryan]

That's got to be a top five. One of the worst experiences you can have in the bathroom.

[Miles]

I don't. I wouldn't know.

[Tyler]

I think you become more, more of a dabber than a, than a swipe than a wiper.

[Ryan]

You're like. You're sponging it off. Almost.

[Tyler]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Swiper, no, swiping.

[Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tyler]

You become more of a dabber, I.

[Miles]

Think, I think that's probably why bidets became popular.

[Ryan]

Probably.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah. Honestly, I just probably unravel the hose head outside. Unravel the hose and just.

[Miles]

I just use my sock at that point.

[Jared]

My wool sock.

[Tyler]

Yeah, yeah. I mean they used to use cloth diapers. Why can't you wipe. Wipe ass with a sock and then just wash it?

[Miles]

It probably did, you know. Hey honey, I Need you to help me get this splitter out of my ass crack again.

[Ryan]

He just. You called out for the. From the bathroom. Honey, can you grab me some corn cobs? I'm all out, Sandy.

[Jared]

Like, three of them.

[Tyler]

You guys are having corn on the cob that night. You're it. Don't throw your cobs away. We gotta dry those out, stick them in the bathroom.

[Ryan]

Take those husks, though, and toss them. We don't need those for wiping our ass.

[Miles]

Yeah, for like, the longest time, they thought that corn was digested and the. The stuff that came out was just.

[Ryan]

From wiping the cob.

[Miles]

I didn't realize for the longest time that it wasn't actually digested correctly.

[Tyler]

Yeah, it would rehydrate and then come out of.

[Jared]

So gross.

[Tyler]

It's life, though, you know?

[Jared]

It's true.

[Tyler]

Life is gross.

[Jared]

It is.

[Miles]

Well. Is that it, Jaren?

[Jared]

That's it.

[Miles]

Well, guys, thanks for tuning in to another episode of you Bet Your radio podcast. May your cobs be corned hold. And may your wife not shame you about making friends. That you talk to someone for 10 minutes, they are your friend. And that's what we believe. Cheers, guys. Cheers, Ryan.

[Tyler]

Love you, Rob.

[E]

Translucent chapstick on my lips so bright Rob's got the charm that lights up the night Women run circles round the boys in town Smarter, faster flipping lessons upside down roller top potato chips in my hand Cards are corn dripping butter so grand free beer flowing in sweatpants we dance hockey jersey Shining in the heat lamps glance Tyler stuck behind that school bus again Tapping the wheel Dreaming of the weekend pizzas in his eyes but no nowhere to go Ducking the rules laughing while he drives slow roller drop potato chips in my hand Cops of corn dripping but are so cram free beer flowing sweatpants we dance hockey jersey shining in the heat lamps glance Late night whispers and hometown pride under the stars where the world confides this little life with all its quirks twists and turns and laughter works Rolling chop potato chips in my hand Cobs of corn dripping butter so grand free beer flowing sweatpants we dance hockey jersey jersey shining in the heat lamps glance late night lamps glance late night wait night whispers in hometown pride under the stars where the world confides this little life with all its quirks Twists and turns and laughter works Laughter works Roll a chop potato chips in my hand Cobs of corn dripping butter soap cray free beer flowing sweatpants we dance hockey jersey shining in the heat lamps glance.

[Miles]

Late.

[Jared]

Night hashtag stump Miles. Would you rather lose to Ryan?

[Tyler]

Hasn't he already been stumped?

[Miles]

I have been stumped.

[Ryan]

We could stump someone more than once.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Jared]

Would you rather lose to Ryan in a game of one on one basketball or lose to Charlie in a game of golf?

[Tyler]

That's a good one.

[Miles]

So. Well, losing to Charlie. Golf would be very embarrassing. If I lose to Ryan and basketball, I'm more just angry than I am embarrassed.

[Jared]

Gotcha.

[Ryan]

I think you should be both angry. And why would you be embarrassed, though?

[Miles]

Of you. I didn't say that. Right. Tyler just did.

[Tyler]

Oh, you. Oh, oh. Embarrassed for losing to Charlie. Angry. Losing to me.

[Miles]

Correct.

[Tyler]

Gotcha. Okay. Yep.

[Miles]

So it's basically do I choose embarrassment or I choose anger? I probably choose anger. At this point in my life, I pride myself much more win the golf game. Yeah. So I think I'd rather lose to Ryan.

[Ryan]

No, I was saying that if you lose to Ryan, you should be angry and embarrassed. I know you've talked a lot of about his basketball game, so you should be more. You should be embarrassed ending.

[Miles]

But even if he beats me now, it's like he doesn't have a time machine. He can't take me back to my prime. It's like. It's like whoop dee doo. You beat an old man at basketball. This is. I'm saying, whoop dee doo.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I don't even. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

If it was yeah, I'd rather lose to Ryan in basketball than Charlie and golf. Losing to Charlie. Golf would be. I'd have to. I think I'd have to have a brain aneurysm.

[Ryan]

He is really bad.

[Miles]

He's like. Yeah, it's not even. Like I say that. And then like we were to play and then I would actually be in danger of losing to him. I. I could have the worst round of my life. I still would be Charlie.

[Tyler]

I also think I'm probably better at basketball right now than Charlie.

[Miles]

Correct. Yeah, that's what I mean.

[Tyler]

Yeah. And basketball is like. Golf is a solo sport. Like, it's purely how, you know, how if you play good, you're gonna. You're gonna win that match 100 out of 100. Even if you play below average. 100 out of 100.

[Miles]

But like, yeah, like, if we have. In the basketball game, if we have a little giant situation where I'm Spike and he's the annexation of Puerto Rico and they would happen to win one out of a hundred. I could sleep at night, everything.

[Ryan]

So if you guys were to play one on one right now, who would win?

[Tyler]

I think I would win to be.

[Miles]

Honest, I think I would win.

[Jared]

Oh, here we go.

[Tyler]

I just think I. In terms of speed and quickness, I think it just have the extra step.

[Miles]

Yeah, but you're, you're, you're forgetting about brute force and heart and heart and grit. Like you're just, you're not competing with me in the low block. All I have to do is back you down. I got enough moves.

[Tyler]

I think I'd probably pick. I'd, I, I'd probably pick it from you before you got to the.

[Miles]

You just wouldn't though. I'm in full control of my elbows. I chalk those babies up. Like to see you go for a pit pocket and catch one of these right to the jaw.

[Tyler]

That'd be offensive though.

[Miles]

No, not if I'm just standing like this and you run into it.

[Tyler]

Well, no, that wouldn't be the case. Straight up defense until I took it, like until I took an elbow to the j. The offensive.

[Miles]

I think it actually would be very competitive.

[Tyler]

No, I agree, I agree.

[Miles]

It. What it'll come down to is who can make more three pointers.

[Tyler]

Correct.

[Miles]

That's going to be a huge portion of it. And I probably am more confident in Ryan's three point game than my own three point game. But in terms of getting to the basket, without a shadow of a doubt, I have the upper hand. I'm like LeBron in his prime in, in the pain playing, not like in the NBA, but like playing you like you're just not stopping LeBron from getting into the paint now. Honestly, I compare a lot of my game to LeBron James just because like three pointers kind of spotty. You know, it's. Some days it's on, some days it's not.

[Ryan]

So this Ryan, but I'm always getting to the rim.

[Miles]

You're left headed LeBron with a lot more hair.

[Tyler]

I would say I'm probably more like a Paul Pierce, Ray Allen mix. Like 09 Celtics.

[Ryan]

I was just saying because you'll look like Steve Nash.

[Miles]

That's the. Yeah, yeah. That's the weirdest mixture because they're nothing alike.

[Tyler]

But like I, like I can. No, well that's what, that's what I'm saying. You get the best of. You get the best. Both players. Like I can shoot this.

[Miles]

Okay, well then I would compare my game to LeBron, Kobe and Michael if you, if they had a baby. Yeah, if we're gonna do that.

[Tyler]

Not even close to the best players of all time.

[Jared]

I'm a mix between Shaq and Mugsy both.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah. There you Go. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Most average height ever.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Yao Ming and Stefan Marbury is probably my game.

[Tyler]

I would say I'm a mixture of like AI and Greg Odin.

[Jared]

That'd be a lethal combo.

[Tyler]

Yeah, but Greg Odin, Ohio State Greg, not Portland Trailblazers. Yeah, yeah. There's a difference there.

[Miles]

So it'd be. It would be. Who do you think is winning between Prime LeBron and a mixture of Ray Allen and Paul Pierce.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I mean the 09 Celtics did win.

[Miles]

They did.

[Tyler]

They did win.

[Miles]

The. They also had Kevin Garnett.

[Jared]

Just saying if you. If you like had both their powers combined so it doubles, then it maybe beat LeBron. But if it's just a mix between the two.

[Miles]

Yeah, I mean, you do have reality. Like you, You. You could have more three pointers. So I'm. You're gonna make me two pointers and I.

[Tyler]

In this situation.

[Miles]

Sorry. Yeah. Two pointers.

[Tyler]

Yeah, you're.

[Miles]

You're gonna make me have to defend more of the court, correct?

[Tyler]

Yeah. And if I. I mean if I could spread the court, it's. It's probably looking like 11, eight scenario, maybe 12, 10.

[Jared]

I think it would be. Be best of three games to 11.

[Tyler]

Back to back to back. Yeah, I'm for sure.

[Jared]

That's two out of three.

[Miles]

If I lose.

[Tyler]

If I lose the first, I'm winning the latter two.

[Miles]

I. I think you're underestimating my fitness level these days. Yeah, that's.

[Tyler]

That's fine.

[Ryan]

Okay. I. I think. I mean, this is. Obviously, we're not gonna have the kindred bet next year. We have to do this now. Yeah, we can't. We can't just tease the patrons like this and then not do it.

[Tyler]

We'll find a court anytime, anywhere. Anytime. Anywhere we have anyone.

[Miles]

We could do it at my lake.

[Ryan]

Perfect.

[Jared]

That would work.

[Tyler]

He's at home. Court advantage. That's the thing.

[Jared]

That's a good point.

[Ryan]

Okay.

[Miles]

No, it's not my home anymore. I'm next door. It's. Whoa, hey, don't. Don't act like.

[Ryan]

How about that?

[Tyler]

If you're playing ball at the lake, though, where are you playing that?

[Miles]

In the street?

[Ryan]

No, we'll do this. We'll make it a three game series. You each get to pick a location and then the, the third location, if need be.

[Tyler]

Patrons choose Jared and Iut.

[Ryan]

Jared and I will pick a neutral site.

[Miles]

Where are you picking for your location?

[Tyler]

I mean, the, The Viking ship, of course.

[Ryan]

You're going to get into the Kindred High school.

[Tyler]

What do you think?

[Ryan]

They gotta give me a key I.

[Tyler]

Mean, if it's anything like we're gonna fess it on anyone. I'm wait just waiting for my key to the gym. The town that we go fest on in. Everyone has a key to the gym.

[Miles]

Everyone in town has a key to the gym. But no one will let us in to play basketball. That's sick.

[Jared]

That's underrated.

[Tyler]

So yeah gym my keys got.

[Miles]

And if he can't. Is it a forfeit if he can't get us into the gym?

[Tyler]

Well, I just pick it. I'll just pick it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I would still pick a different.

[Miles]

Trying to get any angle I can. Yeah, I mean I'll let my game do the talking as I usually do.

[Ryan]

I think Jared should ref. I don't know the rules.

[Jared]

I think it's calling off fouls.

[Miles]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't want.

[Tyler]

That's a. I know but that's a dicey situation.

[Miles]

Dicey situation for who? You're gonna call fouls.

[Tyler]

No, I'm saying you're gonna call fouls.

[Miles]

If you get town. No, you've never seen me play basketball.

[Tyler]

Yes, I have.

[Miles]

Not in the streets. I'm not calling a fucking foul at all.

[Ryan]

Are you gonna be committing them?

[Miles]

Yeah, we'll see. I'll play. I. Hey, I will dance with whatever song you play.

[Tyler]

I'll find out my game.

[Jared]

Do the talk.

[Tyler]

But you're still talking. I'll get. I'll get a look. I'll get a location.

[Miles]

It's just gonna be. I. I really think it's gonna be a live and die by the three pointer for Ryan. If he ends up winning, it's because he'll hit more three pointers than me.

[Ryan]

Do you have a three point line? Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

Okay, cut into the concrete.

[Ryan]

Okay. I couldn't remember.

[Miles]

So we can't even move it. Can't even fib that it's. It's in the concrete.

[Tyler]

Is it?

[Miles]

Oh, God. Yeah. High school, though.

[Tyler]

That's fine. That's fine.

[Jared]

What Mikey guys up to.

[Miles]

Well, then that's a whole other element I have to take into a mic flopping around. You might get a shotgun.

[Ryan]

This I'll rig. I'll rig a shotgun up onto the hoop.

[Jared]

There you go.

[Tyler]

Yeah, we're just. Yeah, we'll throw.

[Miles]

Yeah, we need. We need net noises like the NBA. Yeah.

[Jared]

With a little laugh.

[Tyler]

Snap a lav.

[Miles]

That's what it's gonna sound like every time I'm on offense. Is it make it take it or no?

[Tyler]

No, damn it.

[Miles]

No, make it take it makes the game Go much faster.

[Tyler]

I feel it does. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we don't want that. We want suspense.

[Tyler]

Yeah. I think whoever wins too, that the other person should get to cut the net down.

[Miles]

So when I win.

[Tyler]

So if I win.

[Miles]

If I win it. When I win in the Kindred. You want me cutting the nets down?

[Tyler]

I mean, if that's part of the deal.

[Ryan]

Oh, we'll have replacement nets ready.

[Jared]

Wouldn't even tell her. Cutting the net, though.

[Miles]

They just come the next day. It's just. The net's gone.

[Tyler]

No, Miles just brings the scissors. But I like the court that we're actually playing as chain is chain nets.

[Ryan]

Bring a grinder, angle grinder in there.

[Tyler]

Yeah, I might try and pick one with a chain net.

[Miles]

It's fine.

[Ryan]

That is a cool.

[Miles]

I literally used to do basketball practice at the Dyke West. I'm. You think I'm joking.

[Tyler]

No, I just, you know, I trained.

[Miles]

On those hard rims.

[Tyler]

That's. Yeah, that's great. I bet.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Tyler]

You train hard.

[Jared]

Oh.

[Miles]

So when are we doing this? Are we gonna do it? Are we gonna come in?

[Ryan]

Yeah, we should.

[Tyler]

I. I'm. I'm down.

[Ryan]

We call it the summer series. We'll do one in June, one in July, one in August.

[Jared]

Sorry. I like that.

[Miles]

That's so drawn out. Yes. Three months for 11 point game. All right, that's fine. Ah, it's so much time to think about a game, though. Like, if you lose the first round to WA month, it does kind of.

[Tyler]

Add another fun element into it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I. I like it. I think it gives you guys time to. We can do press conferences in between. On Patreon, you have your own uniforms. Yeah.

[Miles]

So now I gotta start running. God damn it.

[Tyler]

It's full. Full court too.

[Miles]

Guys. If you want more, you betcha. Radio, you gotta check out our Patreon. You gotta go to patreon.com you betsradio or look us up on the app. And we have hundreds of hours of other episodes on there that you can't get unless you're signed up. So you got to check us out on Patreon. You bet your radio, baby.