You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

Episode: We Made It Weird #217

Date: May 10, 2025
Host: Pete Holmes
Guest: Valerie Chaney
Setting: Live-to-tape from Toronto

Episode Overview

This episode is a classic, freewheeling "We Made It Weird" installment where Pete Holmes and his wife, Valerie Chaney, delve into the oddities of everyday life, domestic quirks, and the philosophical depths beneath minor mishaps. Broadcasting from Toronto, they discuss high IQ tests, social etiquette about favors, domestic chores, and a wallet-losing adventure, all tinted with Pete's signature playful, neurotic humor. The underlying theme: How our secret weirdness and small failures are integral to being human—and even beautiful.

Key Discussion Points

1. IQ Tests: Are They Legit or Just Fun?

(04:03 – 09:05)

• Valerie describes taking a seven-minute, 30-question IQ test on the Impulse app, achieving a questionable score of 142.
• Pete playfully interrogates the legitimacy:
  "I think a real IQ test takes longer than seven minutes." (05:17)
• They discuss online tests’ dubious authority and how the appeal is less in results, more in the curiosity and playful self-assessment.
• Valerie reflects on her test-taking approach:
  “I was just like… okay, just think about it less, like, what’s your gut?... And then I did that, and I got 29 out of 30 questions right.” (08:32)
• The couple riffs on the arbitrary scale of IQ scores and the incongruities between “genius” and “real life,” leading Pete to muse on classic absent-minded professor stereotypes.

2. Social Etiquette: Mailing a Letter for a Friend

(14:13 – 34:00)

• Pete recounts an incident where he asked a friend, Ariella, to mail a letter for him, leading her to feel insulted—like being treated as an assistant.
• Valerie observes how mailing something is the "perfect intersection" of being:
  • Too easy to ask a friend
  • Too much to ask someone else to do for you
• Pete receives confirmation that the story resonated with Larry David himself via Carol Leifer:
  “Lunch with Larry, and I told him your stamp letter idea. He absolutely loved it… Too bad Curb isn’t happening. It would’ve been a home run.” (25:20)
• They explore the odd boundaries of friendship tasks, subtleties of “emotional labor,” and the little ways requests can feel heavy or condescending.
• “If you gave me the book and then I left it at a restaurant, I couldn’t ask the person who gave me the gift to go get it, because as soon as it leaves their hands and touches mine, it is now my book.” (29:03)
• Gender and social roles enter the chat:
  “There’s sort of like a secretary kind of vibe to a man asking a woman to do that.” (33:14)

3. Domestic Weirdness: Dishwashers, Underwear, and the 'One Bowl' Dream

(16:39 – 23:00)

• Pete discusses his irrational distrust of dishwashers—he just doesn’t “buy it." He trusts chemistry (detergent) over machinery.
• Valerie teases Pete’s desire to live like a monk with “one bowl and one spoon,” much to her amusement.
• Pete outs himself as a compulsive “second spooner” and over-frequenter of underwear changes:
  “Nobody is as familiar with the material... the lifespan of MeUndies than I am. And it’s because of your underwear.” (21:29)
• The segment is a classic reveal of household eccentricities as universal comedy gold.

4. Wallet Adventure & Finding Joy in Small Perils

(47:01 – 54:50)

• Valerie loses her wallet in Salt Lake City after an epic dinner and ice cream.
• Pete’s reaction is a study in zen-like patience and reframing: “This is an opportunity to love Valerie.” (54:29)
• After searching, they recover the wallet at the ice cream shop, feeling a euphoric triumph.
• Pete links the relief to the ancient theme of finding lost things being among life’s greatest joys:
  “The feeling of losing something and then finding it is and has always been the best feeling.” (51:31)
• Valerie reflects on how, after parenting hardships, minor problems like losing a wallet feel trivial.

5. The Transcendent Ice Cream Experience

(39:06 – 46:01)

• The couple rhapsodizes about a trip to “Normal Ice Cream” in Salt Lake City.
• Pete humorously describes the vanilla soft serve as “triple ice cream,” so thick you could “fix a toilet with it”–
  “It’s like plastic and it’s almost like caulk; it’s too thick. You could fix a toilet with it.” (44:04)
• Valerie laments ordering the “special” strawberry concoction instead of the transcendent vanilla.
  • Conclusion: In ice cream and life, classic simplicity can be the peak.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On IQ Test Doubts:
  Pete: “I brought ChatGPT in to be like, yes, seven minutes can get you… she started talking about the validity of the test in general.” (07:44)
• On Asking Favors:
  Valerie: “It is that exact unspoken sort of social thing that Curb always points out: You’re not wrong, Walter, you’re just an asshole.” (26:19)
• On Domestic Life:
  Pete: “If a plate is in a dishwasher, it might as well be in a dump. It’s gone and I’ll never think of it again.” (19:18)
• On Losing (and Finding) The Wallet:
  Pete: “This is an opportunity to love Valerie… this is no problem, this is fun, let’s get in the car, it’s no big deal. And we will remember it.” (54:57)
• On Post-Parenting Perspective:
  Valerie: “After you have a baby … you’re kinda like, nothing’s a big deal. Having a kid is so hard … that it works the muscle of…well, it’s kind of inconvenient.” (52:01)
• On Laundry & Environmentalism:
  Pete (on Gladwell): “Turns out…80% of what makes laundry so, like, environmentally terrible… is washing with warm or hot water… If everyone used cold water, we would have a huge step forward in the environment.” (58:09)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• IQ Test & Legitimacy: 04:03 – 09:05
• Etiquette of Favors / Mailing Letters: 14:13 – 34:00
• Dishwasher Debates & Domesticity: 16:39 – 23:00
• Larry David Loves the Story: 25:20
• Gift Responsibility Logic: 29:03
• Gender Dynamics in Favors: 33:14
• Salt Lake City Adventure / Wallet Story: 47:01 – 54:50
• Epic Ice Cream Review: 39:06 – 46:01
• Laundry, Cold Water & Environmental Hack: 56:10 – 58:27

Tone & Style

• Warm, silly, and self-deprecating; the conversation is a meandering, intimate reflection of real relationships, full of in-jokes, tangents, and everyday wisdom.
• Occasional philosophical depth checks in between playful riffs.
• Quotable, casual, and friendly—true to the spirit of “You Made It Weird.”

Final Takeaway

This episode delivers on the promise that everybody has secret weirdness worth sharing—and poking fun at. With its blend of “first-world problem” confessions, reflections on friendship boundaries, and gentle marital ribbing, Pete and Valerie turn the minutiae of modern adulthood into something weird, wonderful, and ultimately deeply relatable.

Outro Notes:

• “Keep it crispy.”
• Shout-outs to Toronto fans, the “Pete Here Now” tour, and podcast guests.