Transcript

Valerie (0:00)

You made it with. You made it with.

Pete Holmes (0:03)

You made it with.

Valerie (0:04)

Oh, yeah.

Pete Holmes (0:06)

You made it with. Yes, you made it weird. You made it weird with Pete Holmes.

Valerie (0:15)

What's happening, weirdos?

Pete Holmes (0:16)

I know. I know. I always say it, but what a great one.

Valerie (0:19)

I know.

Pete Holmes (0:20)

And you have to listen to the whole thing.

Valerie (0:21)

I'm gonna say we did an in. I think an inverted.

Pete Holmes (0:25)

Yeah, it's inverted. We've done that before. It's sort of silly and more jokey in the second half, but, like, the first half has some real hits, too.

Valerie (0:32)

Real hit.

Pete Holmes (0:33)

I'm just glad you're here.

Valerie (0:35)

Yeah, we're glad you're here. We're glad you're here.

Pete Holmes (0:37)

And I want to say that it's not just one podcast. There's, like, chapters. And you should, like. I don't know why I'm saying this, but, like, if you hit a part where you're like, oh, this isn't for me, don't swap to smartless. Just maybe skip forward a couple minutes, because I promise you, it's like the. The weather in Maine.

Valerie (0:56)

Wait, five minutes.

Pete Holmes (0:57)

That's it. So thank you for being here. This is. We made it weird. These are the. The. I don't want to call them bonus. It's the Friday episode where Valerie and I sit down and we're so glad you're here. And the show is brought to you by things that we like. The tour is one of them. Go to peteholmes.com I'm going on the road. I'll be in Cleveland very, very soon. Then New York, New York, all sorts of stuff. New York, New York, 1, 2, 3, or whatever it is. And PeteHomes.com for all the tour dates. And we have Largo. Oh, that's tonight. Largo. You just missed it. But we do it every month. Petehomes.com for that. And Katie, roll those ads and then we'll roll into the episode. This episode is brought to us by our friends at Mud Water. It's officially fall, and honestly, I am here for it. It's crisp, got layered outfits and that back to routine energy that just makes you actually start getting things done. But if your go to coffee routine is leaving you jittery, crashy, or just kind of over, it might be a time. It might be a time for a new kind of morning ritual, which is where Mud Water comes in. It's a coffee alternative that is delicious. It is made with cacao chai, turmeric, and functional mushrooms like lion's mane and reishi. So you get energy and Focus without the wired feeling or the midday slump. Just the right amount of energy without feeling jittery or wired and no crash. Or if you're more of a matcha person, their matcha starter kit is a total game changer changer. I'm talking smooth, earthy and just the right amount of lift without the bitter aftertaste or weird additives that a lot of matchas sneak in. I've been swapping it for my usual latte usually in the late morning and honestly, no regrets. I'm obsessed with Mud Water because it is grounded, it is delicious, it is warm and doesn't get you jacked right around when 3pm rolls around, I want that little boost. Hit it up. No crash, no problem sleeping. It's 100 organic, gluten free and vegan coffee alternative. So if you are ready to make a switch cleaner energy, head to Mud Water M u d w t r.com and grab your starter kit today right now. Weirdos get an exclusive deal up to 43% off your entire order plus free shipping and a free rechargeable frother when you use Code Weird. That's right up to 43% off with code weird@m u d wtr.com after your purchase tell them we sent you time to swap it up. Keep your energy natural and refreshing all year long with Mud Water because life's too short for anything less than clean delicious energy. We're also brought to us by our friends at Kenobody. This is a company that has completely transformed my health and the way that I feel day to day. I am obsessed. One of the main ones main ones that I love taking is Mojo, which is a healthy testosterone support that is really changing the way I feel, the way I behave. My workouts are better, feel sharper, more decisive, more energy. Testosterone is linked to so many ways, wonderful things. There was a study found between 1987 and 2004, men's average testosterone levels were dropping about 1% a year and that suggests that about 30, 40% lower testosterone is what we're dealing with than our grandfathers did in the 80s. I didn't even know that was a problem. But now that I'm taking Kenobody mojo, I'm feeling so much more motivated, driven, creative. My workouts are longer and easier and my energy is up and my blood flow wink wink wink is up and everything that that could possibly mean to get your blood flow blood flow totally mojoed. So mojo is the solution. Giving your body the vitamins and minerals it needs to produce testosterone naturally, lowering that cortisol, getting you less stress so your body can do it on its own and give you your mojo back. I love all their supplements, but that's the one I'm shouting out today. I also love their keno octane. I just had one this morning. Is their pre workout, natural, clean energy, euphoric focus. It is awesome. Try everything you see on that website. 20% off at kinobody.com K-I-N-O-B-O-Y.com with your first order with code. Weird. All right, everybody. So glad you're here.

Summary

You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes

"We Made It Weird #228" – September 26, 2025

Hosts: Pete Holmes & Valerie
Theme: Exploring Secret Genius, Personal Weirdness, and Mental Wellness

Episode Overview

This week's episode of "We Made It Weird" (#228) features Pete Holmes and his wife, Valerie, diving into what makes people "weird," how personal quirks and mental health shape our lives, and the everyday magic in coincidence and self-insight. The pair swing between playfulness and depth, riffing on everything from numerology to hygiene to the limits of human bandwidth for world news, all with the blend of earnestness and self-deprecating comedy that defines their dynamic.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Meta-ness of “We Made It Weird” (05:02–06:18)

The Show’s Heart: Pete riffs on the real hook of the podcast—not the topics per se, but the chemistry between him and Valerie. “What’s really gripping, engaging, and grappling about the show is our dynamic, Valerie.” (05:15)
Valerie’s Confession: For the first time, Valerie says she “understands the show,” having listened back and reflected on its vibe (05:44).

2. Numerology, Math, and Pattern Recognition (06:02–08:40)

Valerie’s Birthday Episode: The number 228 (her birthday) spirals into musings on numerology, movie obsessions with numbers ("A Beautiful Mind"), and how math as a discipline can feel insane when stretched too far.
Pete’s Joke: “I love when numerologists realize that all numbers are numbers that are added or subtracted.” (06:18)

3. News, Media, and Overwhelm (09:13–15:45)

Getting News via Friends: Pete proudly admits he gets news “from people,” especially his friend Matt McCarthy:
“I get my news from one guy, so it’s biased and off-kilter and lopsided just like everybody. But at least I know it’s one fucking guy.” (10:52)
Modern Bandwidth: Both discuss their vulnerability and feeling overwhelmed by the pressure to be globally informed, pointing out that human brains are still “meat puppets” evolved for small, tribal communities.
Valerie: “I look around our house and I’m seeing 50 tasks I have to do… none of them are things that I want to do. We’re always sort of living at capacity.” (15:01)
Pete: “I think there are people who have a lot of bandwidth... But I also… sometimes I feel that way about people that get really into completionist video games. You just must have a different kind of brain.” (14:06)

4. The Thin Line Between Insight and Mania (16:28–20:57)

Pattern-seeking and Psychosis:
They discuss how looking for meaning in everything can be both spiritual and a sign of mental instability—“A stereotypically unstable person sees meaning in all things.” (17:18)
Ram Dass Anecdote: Pete brings up Ram Dass’ story about visiting his brother in a psychiatric facility:
“‘I’m Jesus Christ.’ And Ram Dass was like, ‘Me too. But I don’t think we mean this in the same way.’” (17:44)
Psychosis Defined: Pete: “Psychosis is what I believe, plus your ego.” (18:15)

5. Synchronicity vs. Delusion (22:09–23:08)

Peanut Farmer Coincidences: The pair marvel at how they'd independently referenced Jimmy Carter as a peanut farmer before being reminded by a TV show—acknowledging life's “magical, weird things” but stopping short of acting on every coincidence.
Magic & Reality: Pete: “We just go, like, ‘Whoa.’ But we don’t go, ‘Okay, sell all our bonds or something.’” (22:38)

6. Trauma, Motherhood, & Staying Grounded (24:16–26:39)

Parenthood Anchors: Valerie describes her commitment not to “lose it,” especially after having their daughter, Leela:
“I remember seeing the words pregnant on the pregnancy test, and the feeling I had was, you’ve got to keep it together forever now.” (25:02)
Earthiness Over Abstraction: Having gone from whimsy to practicality, Valerie stresses grounding herself: “Sandra Bullock kissing the ground in Gravity and just being like, ‘I’m staying here.’” (25:44)
Rupert Spira’s Teaching: Pete repeats Rupert’s insight on reality as an “illusion,” clarifying: “Illusion just means it’s not what it appears to be. You think there’s a snake in your garage… turns out it’s a rope.” (26:39)

7. Accepting What Is—Mental Wellness Strategies (37:09–44:57)

Thankfulness as Practice: Pete discusses his struggle with anxiety and shares a tool:
“The one practice that would be enough is to say thank you for everything.” (40:53)
Valerie on Anxiety: “You can’t feel gratitude and anxiety at the same time. So it is sort of just shifting that.” (41:01)
Parenting Analogy: Valerie likens emotional work to conscious parenting—suggesting connection (not control) is the path forward: “When you’re trying to get your kid to do something and they’re not, the first thing you should do is try to connect.” (43:45)

8. Mind, Body, and Present Moment (48:01–49:40)

Embodied Awareness: Pete explains how returning to physical sensation roots him in the present:
“When you go to the body… you are going directly to the spacious field that you do label body.” (49:04)
Eckhart Tolle Plug: Valerie: “He says that the body is one of the most effective portals to the present moment.” (49:40)

9. Bit Dump: Peanut Butter, Hygiene, & Puberty (53:26–64:44)

Peanut Butter People: Funny riff on how some people (mostly men, supposedly) are obsessed with peanut butter. “You don't even exist. That's how much like dust you taste [walnut butter].” – Pete (53:43)
Adolescent Hygiene: Pete recalls his seventh-grade primping and experimentation with deodorants, gel, and skincare driven by the urge to impress and fit in:
“Once I figured out that, like, deodorant was a rite of passage, I was like, oh, I can't wait to wear deodorant.” (57:21)
Relatable Frustrations: Valerie voices annoyance that Pete never washes his face but still has great skin:
“It’s very much frustrating to me that you don’t wash your face and your skin is great.” (60:13)
Pete’s Old-Man Tip: “Coconut oil in the sock drawer. So when I get my socks, there it is… Oil up those [toenails]. And it's been working like gangbusters.” (62:15)

10. Love, Shadows, and "You've Got Mail" (65:04–70:10)

Movie as Metaphor for Real Relationships:
- Pete and Valerie dissect the character dynamics of "You've Got Mail" as a metaphor for accepting each other's flaws in relationships:
- “You know that I’m Fox Books. And when I say it was me, I know you say, ‘I was hoping it was you.’” – Pete (68:09)
- Valerie: “That’s what he’s saying is like, this is my shadow. And can you love me anyway?” (69:48)

Notable Quotes & Moments

On News Avoidance:
“If you hit a part where you’re like, ‘oh, this isn’t for me,’ don’t swap to Smartless. Just maybe skip forward a couple minutes, because I promise you, it’s like the weather in Maine. Wait five minutes.”
– Pete Holmes (00:37)
On Pattern-Seeking:
“A stereotypically unstable person sees meaning in all things.”
– Pete Holmes (17:18)
On Anxiety:
“My brain prioritizes everything: code red.”
– Pete Holmes (14:17)
On Parenting and Acceptance:
“With kids… our instinct is to not connect, is to control. Isn’t that exactly what we’re doing with our undesirable feelings?”
– Valerie (43:45)

Tone & Flow

The conversation moves fluidly from comedic bits (peanut butter debates, putty jokes) to raw vulnerability (anxiety, fear of losing one's mind), to philosophical musings (Ram Dass, illusion vs. reality), all punctuated by gentle teasing and mutual encouragement.

Timestamps for Key Segments

[05:02] – Podcast meta-talk and chemistry
[10:52] – Pete’s news habits and bias
[13:43] – The tribal brain and capacity for caring
[17:18] – Patterns, psychosis, and anecdote about Ram Dass
[25:02] – Valerie on motherhood and mental grounding
[37:09] – Practice of saying “thank you” for everything
[49:04] – Discussion of body awareness
[53:26] – "Bit dump" on peanut butter and hygiene
[68:09] – Reflections on "You've Got Mail" and accepting flaws

Takeaways

Embracing weirdness is universal and healing.
Mental health is a continuous negotiation between cosmic insight and staying grounded.
Being grateful, accepting one's mind (and its chaos), and lovingly connecting with others is more than self-help—it’s survival.
Relational intimacy blooms when we accept each other’s, and our own, “shadow” sides.

Keep it crispy, weirdos.