Ep. 117: Choose Joy

Summary

Podcast Summary: You, Me & Mike

Host: Thirteen Media
Episode: Ep. 117: Choose Joy
Date: October 20, 2022

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Overview

In the final installment of their marriage series, Jenn and Mike Todryk explore the theme of "choosing joy" in long-term relationships. Known for their candid, humorous, and down-to-earth conversation style, the Todryks discuss the intentionality behind cultivating happiness within marriage and family life. They reflect on personal stories—both mundane and significant—to illustrate how creating joyful moments, even when life gets chaotic, is often an active choice rather than a passive experience.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Starting With Real Life: Parenting and Last-Minute School Projects

• Jenn opens with a story about their daughter’s last-minute, high-stakes “pumpkin into a book character” school assignment, which had both parents balancing bedtime routines with the rush of competition.
  • Notable exchange:
    • Jenn: “We have 30 minutes till bedtime. And to make stakes even more stressful, the winner gets money.” (02:20)
    • Mike: “Almost in tears with the schools giving kids money.” (02:41)
• The “pumpkin races” tradition is described: Pumpkin derby meets pinewood derby—a lighthearted, communal event that underscores joy through play (03:07–04:14).

Wrapping the Marriage Series: The Myth of Perpetual Happiness

• Jenn and Mike address listener questions about their seemingly happy marriage, emphasizing that social media snippets don’t reflect the whole picture.
  • Jenn: “You see 15 second now 60 second slides... We're not going to put on when we fight.” (05:10)
  • Mike: “I think you need to be intentional in your activities, to have fun and to bring happiness... because that's what brings us together." (05:48)
• Joy, they reiterate, isn’t constant—it’s something that requires effort and intentionality in daily routines.

The Theme of “Choosing Joy” in Marriage

• Jenn: “Joy is a choice, and you really have to work for joy.” (06:37)
• The couple shares their annual Halloween costume tradition: each picks the other’s costume (with mutual understanding of limits courtesy of “Mutually Assured Destruction” humor), resulting in memorable, silly, and bonding moments.
  • Mike: “It's like the 1980s Cold War where it's Mutually Assured destruction… you don't want to have the other person press it.” (07:49)

Ways to Intentionally Create Joy

• Costume tradition and playful competition
• Attempting, albeit inconsistently, scheduled date nights
• Treating even mundane or silly shared activities as opportunities for joy (like podcasting, or competitive sudoku, as shared by a listener)
• Forming habits of seeking fun together, even if it feels forced at first
  • Jenn: “If you start doing that and making a habit, I think that a lot of people will have a lot of fun from it.” (11:55)

Ordinary Play, Games, and Fun in Marriage

• Mike stresses the importance of “play,” from board games to collaborative (or competitive) activities, to maintain connection and happiness.
  • Mike: “Happiness to me is a moment of experience. And experience comes through play and through laughter and through connection.” (12:24)
• The couple reflect on VR gaming ("Beat Saber" dance nights post-kids’ bedtime) and other games like Rummikub—the latter sparking mock frustration over Jenn’s skill.
  • Jenn: “I forced you to play Rummikub with me... and then you kind of got into it.” (14:25)
  • Mike: “You're so dang good at that game, it's frustrating.” (14:57)

Celebrating Connection Amidst Chaos

• Joy isn’t just planned—it can arise in stressful or unexpected circumstances, like being snowed in during the Texas ice storm, stranded in Colorado with their kids.
  • Mike: “That kind of great and awful trip at the same time was really fun.” (19:04)
  • Jenn: “It was just crazy... Everything was closed there too... So Mike and I went on Zillow and found homes for sale.” (19:52)
• Shared adversity often creates the best stories and deepest bonds.
  • AJR lyric invoked: “100 bad days lead to 100 good stories. 100 good stories make me interesting at parties.” (21:09)

The Value of Intentionality: For Spouse and Children

• “Be intentional” becomes a recurring mantra—making an effort for a partner in the same way you would for your children.
  • Mike: “Be intentional, right?... you also have to be intentional to your spouse. You really do.” (22:14)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Jenn: “A lot of times, especially in marriage, joy is a choice, and you really have to work for joy. And I know that sounds messed up, but everyone thinks joy is just... you're always happy and it naturally happens. And that's not the case.” (06:37)
• Mike (on Halloween costumes): “Also, if you get too dirty and too nasty with the other person, there’s always get back the next year…” (07:36)
• Jenn: “You have to create the habit of having joy. And it comes.” (11:55)
• Mike: “Play is so important… happiness to me is a moment of experience.” (12:24)
• Jenn: “I want this... the whole point of finding joy is... joy can be fleeting. And sometimes we have to put ourselves in situations where joy can happen—even if it’s scheduled.” (15:26)

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Fun and Light-Hearted Moments

• Costume recaps: "Bob Ross riding a bear," "pickle in a green tutu," "Reno 911 meets Guy Fieri" (08:07–09:47)
• Dad jokes and banter over audio equipment quirks and podcast “faces for radio” (01:08–02:01)
• “Jar of Weird Question” segment (22:28–25:00), including:
  • Head circumference guessing game
  • Where their kids were conceived (Cabo, post-miscarriage, and "natural family planning" mishaps)

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Key Timestamps for Important Segments

• Story about Berkeley’s school project & pumpkin races: 02:07–04:24
• Transition to episode’s theme—choosing joy in marriage: 05:10–06:37
• Halloween costume tradition: 06:37–09:47
• Games, play, and date nights: 10:53–15:52
• Remembering the snowstorm trip: 18:59–21:32
• Intentionality in family and marriage: 22:00–22:24
• Jar of Weird Question segment (lighthearted Q&A): 22:28–25:51

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Conclusion

The episode highlights that joy, especially in long-term relationships and families, is both an intentional act and something that thrives in shared routines, silliness, and even adversity. Jenn and Mike’s candid storytelling, humorous banter, and practical suggestions collectively champion the idea that happiness in marriage doesn’t just happen—you have to choose it, crave it, and sometimes even schedule it.

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For more on "what to look for" in relationships, the Todryks recommend listening to Part Two of the episode.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome to you, me and Mike. I'm Jen Todrick, otherwise known as the rambling redhead on Instagram and the host and Designer of no DiMareno on HGTV.

[B]

And I'm Mike, and I'm also known.

[A]

As Mike, and he's Mike.

[B]

Applause anyone?

[A]

Applause.

[B]

And while that sounds really important, it's not as important as the third person in this equation, which is you.

[A]

We love sharing our life with all of you on Instagram and hgtv, but here we get to dive deeper into topics that you suggest, answer questions you submitted, and share stor stories that impact us all.

[B]

Let's get to it. What are we going to talk about today, Jen?

[A]

This is our final episode of the marriage series. Not of the season of the podcast in general, but just the marriage series. We are coming in hot with this episode. With brand new earphones, we got some headgear.

[B]

I feel, I feel, I feel. I feel like a pro here.

[A]

You look good in the gunmetal headphones.

[B]

And you in the ice white.

[A]

I know. Aren't they cute? I feel they're kind of tighter.

[B]

They are tighter.

[A]

Do you like it?

[B]

And it's also the other earphones. I don't if you know, it only played like, 25% out of one ear, so that was yours.

[A]

You had the jank ones.

[B]

I did. So now I feel like I'm in, like, 3D audio. Like, remember in the beginning, I felt that I sounded so good. Now I realize I don't how you loved your voice. I loved my voice. And now it's. Suddenly I can hear it in full nasally detail.

[A]

I know it's. I'm telling you, I don't think I have a cute voice either, but here we are.

[B]

I feel like. I feel like I have a voice made for a podcast.

[A]

I think you actually have a really good voice. I don't think mine's that great, but I think yours is really good.

[B]

I have a face made for radio.

[A]

That's a joke, isn't it? It's a dad joke.

[B]

You have a face made for radio, son.

[A]

Okay, so, yeah, we're gonna jump into it tonight. I was gonna tell a story.

[B]

Oh, by the way, we missed Monday Funday this week.

[A]

We did miss Monday Funday this week. It's just been crazy. It's been crazy week. Please forgive us. That's why I said at the very beginning, Monday Funday is not like set in cement. Sometimes they'll happen, sometimes they won't. Just depends on the craziness. It's a bonus. And when it shows up, you just be really excited.

[B]

It's like her. Vivian, she was a bonus.

[A]

She was a bonus baby. And we're just really excited. So tonight, it's right 30 minutes before bedtime. And Berkeley tells me that there's a school project, a school project that she has to complete. And she was very passionate about this school project. And it's making a pumpkin into a book character. So you have to pick a book. Pick a character, and make this pumpkin into the character. And you have to take it to the library. It's due tomorrow. We have 30 minutes till bedtime. And to make stakes even more stressful, the winner gets money.

[B]

What?

[A]

Yeah. So Burke's, like, almost in tears.

[B]

Almost in tears with the schools giving kids money.

[A]

Yes. And so it's optional. So she wouldn't be in trouble.

[B]

I'm joining this.

[A]

I know. So she wouldn't be in trouble for not doing it. But of course, she doesn't want to miss out. So I'm, like, really torn because I'm like, berkeley, it is bedtime. You cannot wait. You know, I definitely bulk up a little bit. I'm momming at this point. But also, I'm competitive, and I'm like, get the pumpkin. Let's go. So just so you know, that pumpkin that y' all were going to use for the pumpkin race, you're gonna need to get another one, because we had to use it for the project.

[B]

By the way, if you don't know what pumpkin races are and you don't have them in your neighborhood, you gotta start it.

[A]

So fun.

[B]

So it's basically pinewood derby meets pumpkin carving. Decoration.

[A]

Carving.

[B]

No. You can. You decorate your pumpkins, and you place wheels on it, and they have to have certain type of axles, and you. You have a ramp, and you race your pumpkins with wheels down. It's the silliest, craziest thing in the world. And then it's a whole thing. The neighborhood gets into it. It's awesome. It's so much fun.

[A]

What happens if it, like, crashes or something or it breaks or someone gets to bash it in?

[B]

Yeah. So there's this subtle idea that you might want to cheat a little bit because you can win, and. But if you found out that you cheat or you push, they get to smash your pumpkin.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

So there's always so, like, somebody needs to make a fake. It makes it more fun for the kids. Kids love it. Literally. It's so much fun. I've never done this before. I've actually never heard of it before. And it went last year. It was. It was awesome.

[A]

It was really fun. The kids loved it. You took the older two and it was right. It was like at 3pm right in the middle of Viv's nap last year. So I let Viv have a nap because we had festivities going on the night or something that I was like, no, we can't skip a nap. But we're going to go this year.

[B]

Riveting stories. And everyone's like, tell me more. Who won? Tell me about this. So here's the thing. Good news. It was canceled or it was postponed because of the rain yesterday or two days ago. So you get to go.

[A]

I know. I'm really excited. So we just need to get a new pumpkin is what I'm saying. Because we just use that for the Christmas Jack. I never have seen the night before Nightmare Before Christmas movie. And that's what Berkeley wanted to do, is the Jack as Santa.

[B]

So, anyways, so that was your bonus story in lieu of Monday.

[A]

Yeah, that's Monday. Funding wrapped into this episode. No. So this is our final episode where we're going to be talking. I mean, I'm sure marriage is going to come up all the time. I'm sure. But I kind of had a dedicated chunk of episodes there that were dedicated to marriage. And we're going to put a little pretty bow on it this week, kind of end it. We've had my parents on. We've talked about our story. They're married. Yes. We've talked about how to fight healthy communication. Biggest fights that you guys submitted. For those who are married, what causes the most tension?

[B]

That was a good one.

[A]

That was a really good one. So today we're going to end it with finding joy in a marriage. Because a lot of questions were the typical. You guys seem so happy on Instagram, which is just a loaded issue. Because, guys, you see 15 second now 60 second slides. Because now it's a minute. You see 15 second slides of our lives and we're not going to put on when we fight. That's not what.

[B]

And 30 minutes of us talking.

[A]

Yeah. In here. So. So, um, while it's not always. I mean, I think our marriage as a whole is rainbows and butterflies. It's great. But it's not. Every single minute of our day, there is tension. We have fights. So how do we keep joy within our marriage?

[B]

I think that's a good question. I think that's a dedicated question that should take up probably the rest of this first part for sure. Because I think you need to be intentional in. In your activities, to have fun and to bring happiness and to bring activities that really, you know, make you have moments of. Of remembrance. Because that's what brings us together. It's. It's. We're not too different than our children. The fact that we want to be connected. We want to be together in every love language we talked about before, you should. We should try to be intentional in those things. And. And I will say with my stupid how the hobby lobby signs that I like to make laughter or, you know, love laughter and honesty. There it is. That's the sign. We know it's an amazing sign and somebody make it for us.

[A]

Never been made and please don't make it.

[B]

But. Yes, but it's actually love. Big laugh, loud and brutal honesty.

[A]

So to go off of what you're saying, I wanted to start by saying a lot of times, especially in marriage, joy is a choice, and you really have to work for joy. And I know that sounds messed up, but everyone thinks joy is just. You're always happy and it naturally happens. And that's not the case. Sometimes I feel like you have to set things in place to cause joy and to bring joy. For example, like one that's coming up so it's relevant is we decided for every Halloween this is going to be our fourth year of doing this is that we pick each other's third year.

[B]

Yeah, third year. First year you were Bob Ross on a bear. Oh, wait, let's tell what you do first.

[A]

Yeah, you're jumping ahead.

[B]

I am.

[A]

Sorry.

[B]

Okay, pause, rewind.

[A]

That's actually really good. It's very impressive. Okay, so we pick each other's costumes for each other. We go alone, we film it, and then we present it to each other. And you have to wear what the other person picks. We don't even really have rules in place because we. We know we're not going to do anything too scandalous because we have kids that trick or treat with us.

[B]

Also, if you get too dirty and too nasty with the other person, there's always get back the next year. So that's true. It's like.

[A]

It's more that the kids are around like we're not going to do anything inappropriate that we're going to be like ashamed of with everyone staring at us. Or.

[B]

Or it's like the 1980s Cold War where it's Mutually Assured destruction for nuclear war that USSR and the United States won't press the nuke because you don't want to have the other person press it.

[A]

Okay, good.

[B]

Analogy.

[A]

Maybe for you. So we just don't.

[B]

People out there that get that.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

They're in their 40s. They get it.

[A]

I'm sure there are. So we go and we shop and we try to. I mean, what have we been? So I. Mike has. Mike's honestly better at it than I am. I think his are, like, hybrid, creative ones. What's the first one? It was Bob Ross riding a bear. So he literally took a Bob Ross costume and then also this costume of a dude riding a bear and combine them. It was brilliant.

[B]

Brilliant.

[A]

Last year, I was a pickle in a green tutu and green socks, painted my face. It was literally just a walking pickle.

[B]

You were a pickle and a tutu.

[A]

You were a Teletubby. The year I was a Bob Ross riding a bear. Which is crazy because that was what I had in my cart. That's what you were about to be. We've been the same thing.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And then last year, you.

[B]

You were about to be.

[A]

Oh, I was. Yes. I. I'm sorry. You were about to pick that for me. So we were both.

[B]

Almost changed it and I was like, this seems super weird. Yeah, Bob Ross riding bear. That's a hard one to top. That was my first year.

[A]

I don't know, able to talk.

[B]

I came out with, like, home run on that one. That was a hard one to follow up with. But.

[A]

And we always go super late, so, like, we have to pick the. All the crap no one wants. We've got to go now.

[B]

We do go to Spirit, where there's, like, three outfits left.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And sometimes I'm like, fortunately, you're tiny, so I get to, like, pick out kids outfits sometimes for you. So.

[A]

So we've got to go. Like, now we're late even now. So in last year, the Teletubby. And then last year, you were Guy. How do you say his name?

[B]

Guy Ferrari.

[A]

No, it's not Ferrari. Fury. Fury the cooking the chef Guy Gaia Fury.

[B]

Guy.

[A]

And then also you were like a sheriff. It's very weird. It was a hybrid. Again, it was Left over.

[B]

Reno911 Nude Boot Goofing meets Guy Fury. So it was a hybrid, and nobody understood what I was.

[A]

I didn't even understand. And I'm the one that picked it.

[B]

To be completely honest, everyone could be like, it was like, is this Reno911?

[A]

All I know is it was a little too small. And if you look back on my Instagram picture of our Halloween, you have, like, a very distinct but bulge, and it makes Me very. It.

[B]

Appreciate that.

[A]

I think it made everyone uncomfortable.

[B]

What do you call a three hump camel? A camel pregnant. Why?

[A]

I just want to paint a mental picture. All I see is Mike sitting at a foot of the bed across from me, his little headphones on, holding a beer. And I only see his eyes over the microphone. So he's like, literally pausing to look at me. And it's just. He's staring into my soul after he does a dad joke. We are doing things that create joy. Right. But again, while that seems really fun and exciting, I think it's a good analogy because it's still something we have to go to the store and act we have to do in order to have fun. So I'm trying to think of, like, another thing that. Okay, so we really suck at this, but this is another example is like, scheduling date nights and, like, keeping to it. It's another way to kind of create joy and spend time together. We suck at that. We're not good at that. We don't do that. So I. Well, I don't want to be hypocritical. I want to admit that right now.

[B]

Can I say this? We have fun on date nights.

[A]

Well, yeah, but we don't have them very often.

[B]

But we. But it's not. We spend a lot of time together. And here's the. Here's the really weird, twisted things that I think that Connect Us is doing things like this.

[A]

Like a podcast. Yeah, that's another one. So I was talking about how much I hate sudoku puzzles in my stories the other day, and I looked at a DM and someone said that her and her husband do sudoku puzzles. They time each other at the same time, same level, and see who wins. Yeah, and it's just like that little bitty stuff that seems insignificant. Those are little bitty things that can spark joy unexpectedly. And so when you kind of think of things you can do, it might feel dumb or stupid, Especially if it's a relationship that maybe y' all are struggling right now or you don't want to hang out right now because you're kind of at each other's throats. I know it might feel forced at the beginning, but if you start doing that and making a habit, I. I think that a lot of people will have a lot of fun from it. You just have to create the habit. I know it sounds crazy, but you have to create the habit of having joy. And it hap. And it comes.

[B]

Right. But joy, there's. I mean, again, it's not just like this. Hey, just find this thing and do it. It's. It is finding things that you both have fun with. And I. I am a huge proponent of play and. And playing. The standpoint of, like, having fun and finding activities and doing whatever it is.

[A]

Tibbies. Activity, Vivian, that real activities. Activities.

[B]

Activities. Okay, but play is so important. And again, and I say it's not tapping into the childhood to be this, you know, cheesiness of things, but the truth is, is that happiness to me is a moment of. Of experience. And experience comes through play and through. Through laughter and through connection. And whether it's a board game and your spouse may be the, like, super hyper competitive, but it fills their cup. And. And then, you know, even though it might be really intense in the moment, but at the end, you're like. That was right. Like, having fun together and finding fun in the mundane of life is important. And Jen and I find fun in things like podcasting and sometimes going live and, you know, her let, you know, I'm popping on the TV show and being a part of that. That's like. It's a cool experience.

[A]

I wouldn't say filming the TV show is like, a way that we bring joy to our marriage. Sorry. That's work for me. I love doing.

[B]

No, but. But I'll say this. It's your work. And then when I pop in, I feel part of you, and I feel it like. And I know it's.

[A]

It sounds really dirty and rated R. Hey. Hello. But today we were at the brewery today.

[B]

Went to the brewery. Right. And there were things that you were like. Okay. There's like. You see all that progress that's being. Making you really get more connected by bringing your spouse in part of your life as well. And it's so joy can be in the moments, the little moments. But again, finding the moments of intentional. I would say play. Play. It's so important.

[A]

Do you remember a time? Well, I'm gonna let you guess. This was a time, end of last year, this year, where we kind of did something like every single night, and it was really fun and it.

[B]

No, I remember that. Testosterone.

[A]

No, not that Mike. Not that Mike. No. No. Yeah, so. No, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the. The headset, the VR. Remember? We got that for Christmas.

[B]

No, that wasn't. It was a little bit later.

[A]

Yes, we l. That from Christmas probably till mid January. Every night it was.

[B]

It was probably into February.

[A]

Yeah. Every night the kids would go to bed, and Mike and I would strap on our VR Pete Saver and we would like, do dance and it was so fun. Like, I just think of that was a really fun time. And we didn't know we were like making this funny memory, but it was so freaking fun. And so, I don't know. I know that is like a gadget that is, you know, you pay for. But even like playing a card game or dominoes or Rummy Cube. We went through a little phase where I forced you to play Rummy Cube with me at night and then you kind of got into it.

[B]

Well, I did, but here's the issue. You're so dang good at that game, it's frustrating.

[A]

No, honey, I know. That's true.

[B]

It is.

[A]

Speak true.

[B]

So if you don't know what R Cube is, it's like an accountant's dream. It is organizing whatever. That's all that it is. And I am not really a great accountant. I'm. I think I'm good at math. Actually. I would say I excel at math, but when it comes to organization and.

[A]

I suck at math, it ain't my jam.

[B]

And fun.

[A]

It's a fun game. So I've also been playing since I was like six.

[B]

To a person who doesn't like organizing, it's a stressful game.

[A]

I love it so much. So anyways, I. I want this. I'm. The whole point of like finding joy is like, it's not. I think a lot of people are under the impression of it's that first dating love, first married joy. And that stuff is so awesome and you should soak it in and love the moment. But just know that joy can be fleeting. And sometimes we have to put ourselves in situations where joy can happen. Even if it's scheduled, even if. But that's 12 years of marriage.

[B]

But in the beginning it's different.

[A]

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[B]

So, short term, you already brought up the podcast or not the packets, but the VR thing. So in the last year, what's one thing we've done outside the VR that you're like, man, that is. That filled my cup. That was fun. That was really fun this year.

[A]

Gosh, I feel like I need to do a Rolodex of what we did this year.

[B]

It's been a lot. It's been a lot.

[A]

All that's in my head is, like, we filmed. I filmed a ton this year and that's work. So that's not it for me. I really have had fun traveling. I feel like we've traveled a lot recently. And even though some of this, the situations aren't happy reasons to travel, it still creates a moment for our family, for things to happen and to be crammed in a. Crammed in your mom's house and sleeping on couches and on the floor. And I really, really love that. I'm trying to think of something else that I love. I really do love still playing the VR machine with the kids. I've been trying machine. I've been doing our machine VR machine. I've been trying to be more intentional about connecting specifically with Vaughn because he is a little boy. The girls are easy. Berkeley loves board games. I can play with her any second of the day and she'd love to do that. Whereas Von, she's getting older and he has more niche interests. Video games. And I stink at video games. I'm not good at them. I literally can't even take like the remote. What Is it called the control and, like, make the man walk and turn at the same time? I can't let alone shoot, like, a gun or something. I can't do it. So he loves playing that VR machine. So I'm like, all right, Vaughn, come on, strap on the headset. And we play VR. And I really like doing that. It's really fun.

[B]

That's awesome.

[A]

I don't know. Those are lame. I feel like. Should have asked me that before because I feel like there's so many better things we've done well. We played VR and traveled with our kids. That's it.

[B]

No, there's. There's.

[A]

There's better things.

[B]

So many things that we create. Laugh.

[A]

I really loved being stuck in Colorado, but that was last year.

[B]

Funny as I was. That. That was. That's more than you. I was going to say the same thing. That. That kind of great and awful trip at the same time was really fun.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it was really stressful. But it. At the same time, there were so many unique moments and memories that we created. But jumping in a random airbnb because we had nowhere else to stay. And. And it was. It was just. It was. It was a lot of fun. And then, like, looking for homes because we were bored in the moment.

[A]

So the Texas ice storm of 2021 hit, and we were in Colorado. Colorado Springs, specifically. We hit two different.

[B]

Supposed to fly.

[A]

We went to Vail. Yeah, we went to Vail, and then we went to Colorado Springs. The storm hit. We were supposed to fly out the next day. Obviously didn't happen. We were stuck there for five more days, I believe.

[B]

Which is cool because I was stationed there. I lived there for almost five years when I was in the Army.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

City. So it was cool.

[A]

You know, that's different with it. With three little kids and one was 11 years old. And so what was happening is we literally had to find a different place to stay because our place was up. And it was just crazy. Everything was closed there, too, like businesses. And there was really nothing to do. So Mike and I went on Zillow and found homes for sale. And we walked two houses. We did, like, we were gonna freaking move. We.

[B]

I mean, there were. I love Colorado. I love Colorado.

[A]

I do, too.

[B]

It's.

[A]

That's ridiculous that we, like, looked to go by there. That's insane. That's what we do when we're stuck somewhere on board this.

[B]

So that weird, crazy snowstorm that came through. I went to Cheyenne Mountain Zoo with the kids. Remember? You stayed back with Vivian Yep. Because she was napping. It was in the middle of a snowstorm.

[A]

Oh, my gosh.

[B]

For some reason, the zoo was open. And that zoo is. If you haven't been to the Colorado Springs Zoo in. In Cheyenne Mountain, you know, it is incredible. It really is so cool. It's like on the side of a mountain. And they have all these interactive places with, you know, you can feed the giraffes and they have birds that fly over you. We had the zoo to ourselves, and it was. It was in a. I don't say it was almost a blizzard. So every time we would go outside, it was crazy. And the kids and. And I had such a fun memory of that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What is it the. What Is it the AJR song that says 100 bad days lead to 100 bad days lead.

[A]

100 good stories make me interesting.

[B]

That's right. 100 bad D. 100 bad days lead to 100 good stories. 100. 100 good stories make me interested in party. So the interesting. I mean, the truth is, is that bad and weird things, you can create joy. And even in that. And I know it's like spring, the circle around that whole thing. But like, don't. Don't forget the moment you're in. There's always an opportunity. And the things that may feel like they're.

[A]

Well, that's natural joy. So that's joy that naturally happens. I think it's more like. Especially if people have been married for a long time and things are getting stale, or specifically if you're in a rough spot, it's okay to schedule things that joy will happen within that. But that makes sense. Like the Halloween costumes, like playing a board game, like starting a TV series. And you guys have to bust out TV story or TV series. You know, every.

[B]

Just make a TV show. No, just go ahead and make an TV show.

[A]

Just make a TV show, guys. Make it. No, that'll cause more fights. Don't do that.

[B]

No, that's hilarious. And I would say that this is relevant. It's not just relevant to. To marriage. It's relevant to your family and your kids.

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[B]

Those things just be intentional, right? And I guess we keep saying that word over.

[A]

You know what? That's actually really good. Be intentional for your kids. And we say that all the time, but you also have to be intentional to your spouse. You really do.

[B]

You know what?

[A]

What?

[B]

By the interest of time.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I will now be introducing a new segment called.

[A]

I think this is an old segment.

[B]

Jar of weird question.

[A]

It's not new. At all, folks. It's here every episode.

[B]

Jen.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

This is a serious one.

[A]

Okay. Again, these are questions that you guys submitted through Instagram, and now we read them, and some of them are weird, and some of them are just fun things.

[B]

And this one is also written with, I don't know what the. The acronym or not the acronym, but the. What happens when you shorten a word? What's it called when you put apostrophe in it? What's that called?

[A]

Apostrophe.

[B]

When you shorten conjunction. I said at the same time. Jinx.

[A]

Oh, fine. Okay, fine. You knew it.

[B]

Just like I did, because there's a con. There's a Texas conjunction in this. I don't know if you added this or it's in Texan. It is.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

What is Yalls Head circumference? Yalls.

[A]

Interesting. Can we skip that, considering we're stuck in a podcast? Like.

[B]

Well, no, you just have to guess.

[A]

Oh, like, I don't know, like, 18, 13. I don't know how it is. No, inches.

[B]

13 inches.

[A]

Is that big? Too big. Too small.

[B]

So many things you could say with.

[A]

I'm really bad at, like, size. Gauging on height, weight.

[B]

Truth is, I have no idea. Yeah, I would say. I would say Jen and I actually probably. You have a very narrow head like your dad.

[A]

I have a small head.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I do, but there's a big brain in there. Junctuary.

[B]

I have a massive. Massive.

[A]

You don't have a big head either.

[B]

I don't. I just. I got a normal size head.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Proportional.

[A]

It's proportional. You have a very proportional noggin, honey.

[B]

That's a too long of a question. Can't do that one. All right. Oh, did we do this one?

[A]

I don't know. I can't read it. I'm on the other side of the bed, honey. I don't.

[B]

I think we've done this one.

[A]

Then do a different one.

[B]

Yeah, I think we did that one because. Or at least. At least it was. It's so close.

[A]

We need the elevator music.

[B]

All right, like, these are. This is a. I don't know. Okay. Do you know when and where your kids were conceived? You put this in there?

[A]

Because I did. I guess I did do that.

[B]

I could say this. Number one.

[A]

Berkeley's in Cabo.

[B]

Number one. Wait, Vaughn. Yes. Because Jen, this is post.

[A]

Are we really talking about this?

[B]

Yeah, the moment you wrote it. So I'm gonna answer this one, Vaughn. Absolutely. Because this was post miscarriage. And that you were very, like.

[A]

Jen was oh, yeah, we're gonna gone was super planned. Berkeley, Cabo. Had a lot of tequila, for sure.

[B]

Vivian.

[A]

Oh, we know you were going out of town for a business trip. It's literally the only time that's a while you were gone away from a business trip. So we knew. Exactly. Remember? I was like, hey, I want to do natural family planning. My friends have had wild success. I can track my own cycle. I don't need help. I don't need contraceptives. Remember? Do you not remember that? And I was like, honey, there's a new way of tracking. I know it.

[B]

You tricked me.

[A]

I know I tricked myself. I was like, I'm so in tune with my body. It's nuts. Honey, it's great. And then we were pregnant two weeks later.

[B]

I cannot believe I forgot about that. That is right. You absolutely. You're like, it's okay. Yeah, I know when I'm ovulating now. I am so. I am such a full woman now that I know my ovulation.

[A]

It was my dang friends. It was my dang friends from high school. They were like, we do natural family planning. It works great. And I did it, and I ended up a human. Anyway, that is all for this episode, but good news is there is a part two ready to be listened to. Listened. Ready to be listened to. Right now. We are going to dive into kind of signs to look for in someone. We had a lot of questions about what to look for for those who are single, maybe engaged, and kind of still out there looking around. And we'll talk about kind of what we. What we were like whenever we were.

[B]

Everything is as we always say. It's. This is always from our perspective. I love that word. And what we do works for us. And it's maybe tips that you're gonna come and say, hey, that's cool. Not us. Find the thing that works for you.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Because every relationship is different. Every marriage is different. Every person's different. Yep. So we're giving you our perspectives because.

[A]

We have microphones in front of our face. Yeah. You know, experts. So we're just gonna talk into these things and push the record button.

[B]

Keep going. All right. We love it. This is awesome. It's fun. Let's move on to part two, right?

[A]

Yes. Thank you all so much for listening. Go listen to part two right now.

[B]

Don't forget to review this. Five stars.

[A]

I'm glad you do that, because I just never asked for five stars.

[B]

Smash that, like, button. Ladies and gentlemen, if you want to hear some more, let's go and you know, smash it and love it.

[A]

Goodbye, you, me and Mike is a production of the Rambling Redhead from thirteen Media.

[B]

Subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts or wherever podcasts are available. While you're at it, leave us a five star rating.

[A]

While you're there, have an idea for a topic you'd like us to discuss? Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or send us a message on Instagram. We would love to share your idea on the show. For a daily dose of our crazy lives, follow us on Instagram, thereambling Redhead and iketodrick and catch no dimoreno on hgtv. Remember, Part two is ready to be listened to right now, so go do that.