Ep. 220: The Comments Section

Summary

Podcast Summary

You, Me & Mike – Ep. 220: The Comments Section
Hosts: Jenn & Mike Todryk
Date: May 6, 2026

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Episode Overview

This season finale is a lively Q&A episode where Jenn and Mike Todryk answer fun, thought-provoking, and practical questions from their listeners. The discussion covers everything from travel dreams, family priorities, and marriage insights to lighthearted “would you rather” scenarios and home design tips. With their signature witty banter and candid honesty, the Todryks give listeners an inside look at their marriage, personalities, and everyday life. This episode marks the end of the current season, with Jenn and Mike promising a return after a summer break.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Lighthearted Intro: Haircuts, Colors, and Banter

• Jenn discusses her new haircut and the disruption it causes at home.
• Mike tries out a ChatGPT color analysis while on the toilet, sparking jokes about color suggestions and practical AI (05:01).
• Discussion about hair growth and beauty routines.

Memorable quote:
“I got my haircut this morning... I had to make an announcement in the house, being like, hey guys, it's just me. I'm not an intruder because I look so different from my haircuts.” – Jenn (01:31)

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2. Q&A: Listener Questions

What’s the oldest thing in your fridge? (08:07)

• Jenn phones her mom to recall the oldest/strangest fridge item, discovering a spice from 2013 still lurking, and an unopened mystery food item from autumn (09:33).
• Humorous household confession of ignoring the green stuff and blaming “dead chicken” for fridge smells.

Dream Travel Destinations (11:54)

• Jenn: Wants to vacation anywhere in Europe, especially Italy, also mentions Hawaii and Scotland.
• Mike: Would take Jenn to Tokyo, believes she’d love it, and discusses differences in culture.
• Interesting digression on the genetics and demographics of redheads.

Memorable quote:
“I want to go to Scotland… apparently. Let's go. It's the land of the redheads.” – Jenn (14:54)

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Redhead Solidarity & Childhood Experiences (16:28)

• Jenn reflects on growing up rarely seeing other redheads and the unique connection among them.

Would You Rather: Look Like or Smell Like Poop? (17:33)

• Jenn and Mike debate which option would be easier to live with, complete with “dirty diaper guy” hacks and the hypothetical show “Keeping up with the Turd Ricks.”

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Handling Different Life Goals & Compromise in Marriage (22:42)

• Emphasize aligning on major goals (family, faith).
• If goals conflict (e.g., retirement dreams), communication and flexibility are crucial.
• Open dialogue and willingness to give and take help prevent resentment.
• Importance of adapting traditional gender roles and teamwork in parenting: dividing up kid logistics to reduce stress on one person.

Memorable quote:
“I think we both have the same life goals, wouldn’t you say?... Most of our goals... revolve around our family.”— Jenn (23:03)
“It comes down to communication... and being open to hearing the other person’s perspective.” – Jenn (29:26)

Notable moment:
Dividing parenting responsibilities by child to maintain fair workload and reduce resentment (32:02).

Actionable takeaway:
Consistent, clear, and honest communication is the key to navigating life goals and preventing resentment.

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Swapping Lives: What Would You Do as Each Other? (44:44)

• Jenn: Would pee outside, lift heavy weights, swing a golf club.
• Mike: Would squatting pee outside, “put on makeup,” experience womanhood quirks, and see what free drinks he could get at the bar.
• Both admit curiosity about the everyday differences between male and female experiences, laced with jokes about peeing, boobs, and vasectomies.

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Biggest Tip for Getting Into Social Media as a Job (47:55)

• Jenn: “Start on TikTok or YouTube... be you. Don’t focus on brand deals until you’ve built a community. I did it for four years before I took my first brand deal.” (48:07)
• Mike: “Don’t chase the algorithm. Just make really good content consistently. If it feels like a grind, step back.” (48:18)
• Both stress: authenticity, patience, and that luck/timing played a part for Jenn.

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Root Canal or Colonoscopy? (53:24)

• Both choose colonoscopy, with Jenn animatedly wanting “to know what’s going on up there.”
• Candid account of colonoscopy prep and joking about “operating the camera” (54:09).

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How Do You Connect as Busy Parents? (55:30)

• TV/movie “wind down” time is their primary way to reconnect.
• Also play games like hand & foot and mahjong; regular nighttime routines where they touch base about their days and kids’ schedules.

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Kid Names: What Were the Alternates? (58:36)

• For boys: Considered Maddox, Lucas, Jagger; Vaughn stuck after an encounter with a misbehaving child named Vaughn.
• For girls: Berkeley was almost Emerson; Vivian was almost Tyler Kate.
• The process reflects their personalities: Jenn decisive, Mike interested in name meanings.

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House Splurges: Where to Invest and Where to Save? (62:55)

• Splurge: Backyard/outdoor space (for quality of life in warm climates); kitchen and main living areas for practical use and entertaining.
• Save: Light fixtures/finishes in secondary bedrooms; avoid over-investing in flooring in starter homes (use LVP vs. hardwood).
• Real estate advice: update for your market, enjoy your space, but don’t outprice your neighborhood.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• "[Marriage] is not about what you want; it’s about what you are together." – Mike (24:43)
• "Communication… is the one word that, if you figure out and master together, you can conquer anything." – Jenn (29:26)
• "Every day of the week, we know what we’re supposed to do. It’s like a well-oiled machine." – Jenn (32:46)
• “If you build it on a lie, you have to keep up that fake. That’s the most exhausting thing in the world.” – Mike (50:52)
• “Luck favors the ready.” – Mike (52:40)
• “I just want him to be his own person… I wanted to avoid confusion with the names.” – Jenn (60:11)
• "If you’re not dying in this house, congratulations, you’re in a game right now—and you want to get as much money out as possible." – Jenn (67:44)

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Important Timestamps

• 00:10: Podcast opens with playful banter
• 06:46: The Todryks announce the season break
• 08:07: Strange fridge finds & calling Jenn’s mom
• 11:54: Dream travel destinations
• 17:33: Redhead solidarity & quirky childhood stories
• 22:42: Deep dive into marriage goals, teamwork, and compromise
• 44:44: Q&A: Swapping bodies—what would you do?
• 47:55: Social media as a career—real talk
• 53:24: Colonoscopy vs. root canal debate
• 55:30: Connecting as parents (TV, games, routines)
• 58:36: Children’s names: alternates and stories
• 62:55: Home design tips: splurge vs. save
• 68:39: Season wrap-up and gratitude

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Tone & Style

• Conversational, witty, candid, lighthearted but sincere
• Frequent playful back-and-forth, jokes, and direct audience engagement
• Honest, sometimes self-deprecating reflections on marriage, parenting, and work

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Final Thoughts & Wrap-Up

Jenn and Mike wrap up with thanks to their small team and their audience, encouraging emails and feedback for next season’s topics and guests. They remind listeners not to expect a long hiatus and tease the depth and variety of their ongoing discussions.

Memorable signoff:
“Cheers to almost summer… catch you on the flippity flop!” (70:51)

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This episode provides a blend of humor, honest relationship insight, and practical Q&A for fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[A]

Hello.

[B]

Hello. Welcome back. It is. Are you gonna say something to me? You smiled and nodded your head.

[A]

Nodding my head. Ready for a podcast?

[B]

Happy Tuesday, everybody. We're recording on a Tuesday. Tuesday afternoon. I just tried some Taco Bell for the first time, and my stomach is the third person of this podcast today. Can you hear it?

[A]

You've had a weird thing in your stomach your entire life.

[B]

I know, but it's not that. It's just gurgling because I put garbage inside of it.

[A]

Fun fact. Jen can actually push her stomach in, and it makes, like, Oscar the Grouch sounds. Sounds like Gary when he's hungry.

[B]

So what it is. What it is, is I actually went to the doctor as a child because I was like, mom, I have a hole in my stomach, like, 1,000%. But you're right. When I, like, take a deep breath and then. What's that called? Inhale? Exhale. It, like, pushes the air, I guess, and it's like. Like, I can control it.

[A]

It makes, like, internal fart sounds.

[B]

It's internal fart sounds.

[A]

I've never seen anyone.

[B]

I think I do it when I don't have a lot in my stomach.

[A]

Maybe the other night. Yeah, I was. The other night. You're like,

[B]

okay, we need some more context there. It was, like, evening. It wasn't, like, night time. I wasn't like, hey, babe, come check this out. Standing up. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Riveting. Anyway, Riveting story.

[B]

I got my haircut this morning.

[A]

Looks good.

[B]

I had to make an announcement in the house, being like, hey, guys, it's just me. I'm not an intruder because I look so different Right. From my haircuts.

[A]

I thought we had a guest on for a moment. When I just walked in here, I couldn't. Yeah. I was like, who's this lady? Yeah.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

I was like, she's. She looks like my wife. But something's different.

[B]

Yes, Drastically.

[A]

If I see you and I'm like, you're hotter, then do I think the older version of you is. Is that, like, rude to say? If I was like, oh, yeah, no,

[B]

I'm temporarily improved, I think. All right, I'm hotter right now.

[A]

Well, what if I thought you were a guest and I'm like, she's hotter than my wife? No, but it is.

[B]

You immediately cannot say that. Nope.

[A]

But it still is you. It's still you, though. Right? That's.

[B]

I know you would never. I think I had to wait till, like, year 14 of marriage for you to admit if a celebrity was attractive, which Mila Kunis. I still remember to this day. I mean we look.

[A]

She's pretty.

[B]

Absolutely nothing alike. Like night and day, I think.

[A]

I mean there's a lot of beautiful redheads out here. But you like. I already have the apex redhead, so why would I.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It's hard to look at anyone else.

[B]

Oh, whatever. It's so full of crap. Whatever.

[A]

Hair isn't. Oh, is that dyed? I know. I judge you instantly.

[B]

So. So here's the deal. Why I think it feels so different to me when I get my hair trimmed. I got curtain. If you can't. If you're not watching on YouTube and you can't see this hairdo, that's sad. But I'll describe it for you. It's the exact same hair I had when I woke up this morning. Just cut, just trimmed a little bit. Yeah, I have curtain bangs on it. I have. I did like quarter of an inch. Do you know how much my hair grew in nine,

[A]

three feet?

[B]

No, that's not physically possible. Six inches.

[A]

That's pretty good.

[B]

That's what you're supposed you. Your luck. Well, I looked up, I did ask the Internet and they said at in your 30s average with a healthy hormonal balance, which you know, can't be me.

[A]

Hey, your numbers are looking better.

[B]

True. It's better now.

[A]

You got some good results recently.

[B]

Better now. But it's still six inches is what you like. It's the high end. And I got. And that's a year. I got six inches in nine months.

[A]

Impressive.

[B]

Shout out.

[A]

Probably glow.

[B]

Shout out to go Shameless. For real.

[A]

You did the end. It's this. It's the same. I did. I was. Had a nice mullet going on. I was kind of enjoying it.

[B]

I kind of like the long hair so it kind of flips out behind the hat. Except then when you don't wear a hat, you just look like a marshmallow.

[A]

That's the right analogy. That's what I was going for.

[B]

Like poofy and square. But when you wear a hat, it's real cute. Long.

[A]

It's like a one piece hat. Like. Like a. Like a Lego headpiece.

[B]

Yeah, you said it, not me.

[A]

I wish. I wish that was a thing. That would be really easy if you just had your like gun hairs.

[B]

It's called a wig, Mike. It's called a wig.

[A]

Take your other one off. It's like a hat.

[B]

Just click, click, clicks on.

[A]

Doesn't get out of place. Looks perfect. Can invent this. A wig with wigs don't look real Lego Headpieces look real at least.

[B]

Well, some wigs nowadays do look real. They're put on like rubber skin and stuff.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Not like real rubber.

[A]

You know, I was playing around with today, Chat. GPT added this new thing where you can do color surveys. Remember you two me told me to do a color.

[B]

You were not in your office with the door shut doing a color analysis.

[A]

I did it on a toilet this morning. Oh, it's a perfect place to do it. You take a picture, you know, check your color.

[B]

You did a color analysis while you're pooping?

[A]

Was. I mean, afterwards. But yeah, it was good. Guess what my colors are.

[B]

I know what your colors are for everything. I've told you.

[A]

What are they?

[B]

Deep navy blue.

[A]

Yes, that was number one. Number two, I've told you.

[B]

Hunter green and maroon are really good.

[A]

Maroon was in the middle. It was like a deep charcoal. Was there.

[B]

Yes. Charcoal looks great on you.

[A]

Guess what was not recommended for me?

[B]

Black or. I'm sorry. White.

[A]

Yes. Boy was like, one of the worst. And I like white shirts.

[B]

No, I know that about you.

[A]

Apparently I look dead.

[B]

You do it. It washes you out for sure.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. But the other one was white.

[B]

Also. White washes me out unless I'm really tan.

[A]

Said yellow. And then like, the last one was like a neon pink, which I was grateful. That was my number one. Like, dang it. Now I get to get neons. Which kind of been cool because I'm like. I be like, why are you so flamboyant now, Mike? You're like, well, according to Chat. My poop chat time to my poop

[B]

chat analysis, I should be wearing hot pink.

[A]

Yeah, you just upload. I up literally was like Little salt was one of the pictures we had from.

[B]

I'm glad you did that because you know what? One of the colors that looks so bad on you that you continue to want to wear is like that baby sky blue.

[A]

Oh, the blue. That was actually okay, though. All the blue tones were.

[B]

No, no, no. Light blue is your worst.

[A]

I'll show you. What? Show me with that. What the AI master said.

[B]

Show me. It's. I can tell you with just my eyeballs that aren't AI that you don't look your best in light blue.

[A]

I was mostly dark colors.

[B]

Yes, you are like me. We're very autumn. Like deep jewel tones.

[A]

It's like our personalities.

[B]

Deep jewel tones.

[A]

Yes. I hear that quite often about me.

[B]

You have a jewel tone personality.

[A]

Yeah, that was actually in my yearbook in high school.

[B]

Okay, well, today is our finale Episode of this season. We'll take a quick break in the summer, and we'll be back when the kids start school.

[A]

It won't be a long break.

[B]

It'll be a couple of months.

[A]

Let's promise it won't be as long as the last break.

[B]

It won't be two years. We'll give you that. No, August is when we're gonna come back, when the kids go back to school. Gives us time for our schedule. But we're taking a break just for everybody in the summertime. My producer, editor, same person.

[A]

A lot of travel.

[B]

Yeah, we have a lot of travel, so. But I thought it would be fun. We had quite a few questions, so to save time and to keep it moving, we printed them on paper. And so I thought it would be fun if I said a question and then you said a question.

[A]

These are really, like, pro.

[B]

Haley.

[A]

Good job, Haley.

[B]

It's just a nice. It's just.

[A]

I know, but they have, like, borders. I feel like this is.

[B]

They are very nice. Well done, Haley.

[A]

It just. You should have had, like, the you, me, and Mike logo on the back of each one of them.

[B]

And we. Next time.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Well, I wanted it to be like, us, not see them. So she pulled some of the best.

[A]

I just saw the. I literally only seen one question that I'm actually reading.

[B]

Well, it's okay if you see it now, Mike. I just wanted it to be like, Well, I got.

[A]

I'm gonna have to see him when I read them. Yes, Correct how eyes work. Unless it's Braille.

[B]

Okay, here we go. We are going out. Do you want me to start? You want me to.

[A]

You have to go. You're ready to roll.

[B]

Okay. Ashley Cruzen asks, what is the strongest. Oh, no. I already jacked it up. Dang it. What is the strangest or oldest thing in your fridge?

[A]

Oh, man.

[B]

I'm gonna have to call my mom. Let's phone a friend. Because my mom cleaned out my fridge with me in January.

[A]

Bizarre.

[B]

And I'm gonna call her and see if she.

[A]

I know we had a spice from before we were married that was in.

[B]

Well, it says fridge.

[A]

I know. I'm going to call her, but we had a. There was a lot.

[B]

She's in the middle of working, but she's at least at home.

[A]

We're phoning a friend for this.

[B]

Phoning a mom. Good morning. Happy Tuesday. Yes. It's afternoon, though. Well, I always say, good morning, Mom. You know this. Even if it's like, 9pm I have a quick question for you by the

[A]

way you're on the air.

[B]

By the way, you're being recorded for a podcast episode in the mic right now. But I. We're recording an episode and people asked questions, like random questions. And this one came up. What is the strangest or oldest thing in your fridge? And I was like, I think we should phone my mother because in January she helped me clean on my fridge. Do you remember how. How old the oldest condiment was in my fridge by chance? No, but I would always go with chicken. Chicken is always the destroyer in your refrigerator. It really is. It's the stink.

[A]

That wasn't that bad. We didn't have like ridiculously old chicken lips.

[B]

No, we have. It gets really stinky. Mom's like, jen, something's dead. Like a chicken.

[A]

Yeah, but that probably just happened cuz we were out of town.

[B]

We always try to talk ourselves into something green. It's never something green. It's always chicken. You're right. I mean, do you remember by chance the oldest spice? Whenever we were cleaning out the spices. Cuz that one went back in time. 2000. 2013, probably 2013. 2013, gross. Awesome. Thanks, mom. I appreciate it. Have a good rest of your workday. I'll talk to you later.

[A]

Bye, Kathy.

[B]

Bye. Okay, 2013 Spice.

[A]

I thought there was. I swear there was one before 2010.

[B]

Hold on. 2013 is when Vaughn was born? Yeah, so it's like I just got really busy and I forgot to come back to that spice.

[A]

Well, we probably were using it for when you were like hand pureeing his food and adding some cumin for it and stuff.

[B]

He's really not mocking me because I did do that like with the first kid. I was like, everything has to be homemade. And I made all of his purees and then realized he hated the puree texture. He wouldn't eat. And so then I did what was called like baby lead. Weaning was a thing back then. And he went, remember, straight to little solid foods. So six months. So he skipped the baby food.

[A]

He likes pouches though. We did do those.

[B]

No, he didn't have many pouches. Berkeley and vivy loved the pouches.

[A]

Pouch, yes.

[B]

It was like a treat. And they were vegetables. Okay, so that's my question.

[A]

Okay, I would. I know. Just going back to that. We still. We had some. We were supposed to do a challenge of like name that food that. Remember Haley bought a bag of.

[B]

Oh, that's still in the fridge.

[A]

Is that still in the fridge?

[B]

It is.

[A]

Because I haven't opened it up and that's probably Haley.

[B]

We should have you check on that. Wasn't that back, like, in the fall? It's still there because you're like, don't

[A]

throw that stuff away. So it's literally on the bottom drawer in the bag still. And every time I put something there, I'm like, I don't know if I'm supposed to throw this away.

[B]

She's saying, we still need to do it.

[A]

I honestly have never opened it up. I don't. So there. That would probably be it.

[B]

That's probably it.

[A]

All right.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Okay, here's my question. This is from Samasi 919.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Samassi 919. If you could go anywhere with just the two of you, where would you go?

[B]

I want to do Europe, just the two of us, eventually.

[A]

Okay, that's. Yeah, that's continent.

[B]

Wait, what was the question?

[A]

Anywhere. Like, narrow it down.

[B]

Yeah, I just want to go to Europe somewhere. I don't care where. I guess Italy. But that's, like. So, like, everyone wants to go to Italy, so I think that.

[A]

Why would that be weird? That's an awesome location. Yeah, Italy is awesome. Super nice.

[B]

I want to go to Hawaii with you.

[A]

Did you know one thing about Italy is that I don't know. Pasta in Italy does not make you bloated. Like, it doesn't.

[B]

You know that. My mom said that. Aunt Haley.

[A]

Yeah. There's, like, people that have, like, gluten intolerance. They don't have the same type of bloating. Has to do with the wheat.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Heirloom wheat.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

We bleach wheat. I saw a video about how we make our wheat.

[B]

Yeah, it's gross. No.

[A]

Or our flour.

[B]

The bleached flour.

[A]

Ridiculous. Makes no sense.

[B]

I don't know why we do it. I mean, I'm sure there's a reason.

[A]

Longer looks. It makes better texture on it. Probably higher profit margin. Glyphosate. You know, glyphosate is Roundup. They literally take flour or wheat that's done. Once they have the berries out, they spray glyphosate, which is a. A pesticide agent on top of it to dry it out. So they use it. They basically use it for the. Like, to keep the weeds away. Then. Then put it on it because it just dries it out almost instantly. And it's horrible for you. Horrible. Horrible.

[B]

Oh, it's horrible.

[A]

I could go on and on about that, but that's. That needs. That needs to go away.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I know why we do it. Has to do with the economy.

[B]

So I don't know why we do half the things.

[A]

Okay, so Italy. I wanna. I wanna go. I. I'd also pick an overseas trip. So I've been. I've been to Europe where I'd like to take you. I'd want to see you in Tokyo with me. Why? I don't know. Because I think that you would like. You've never been. Want to say like thinking. Want to go to somewhere in Asia, but I think Tokyo would be a really cool city. Yeah, I think it'd be really. I've never been to. To East Asia, so I think it'd be awesome.

[B]

Is Tokyo kind of like New York? New York City?

[A]

Yeah. Yes. But it's vibes kinda, but it's also crazy and like tons of cultures, you know, westernized, but it's adjacent. There's a lot of difference in the culture.

[B]

Huh. You think they'd like, try to touch my hair?

[A]

Don't think that there would. That's their thing that people would be

[B]

like, no, I heard it is.

[A]

I don't think so, my friend. That would happened in Tokyo.

[B]

My friend Amber went to. Oh, where'd she go?

[A]

She went somewhere, but I think he went maybe.

[B]

Maybe she's blonde. And they asked. They kept asking her if they could touch her hair. She was not in a remote village. She was in. Oh, she's in Hong Kong. Is Hong Kong.

[A]

That's China.

[B]

I know, but I don't know.

[A]

We should go and find out.

[B]

Oh, you know where I want to go? Where you can come or not, I don't care. But I want to. I want to go to Scotland. Oh, yeah, apparently. Let's go Scotland.

[A]

It's the land of the redheads.

[B]

Yes. Not even Ireland? I always thought it was Ireland, but I read somewhere Scotland, actually. Is it Scotland that has the most highest.

[A]

Can you do a Scottish accent?

[B]

No, not gonna do that. Scottish.

[A]

That's not.

[B]

Oh, that's British. That's British. Yeah. They kind of like, can I have a bottle of water?

[A]

The only.

[B]

Like that.

[A]

No, that's. That's still. That'd be like Vaughn and I do that together.

[B]

We're like.

[A]

And it just progressively Remember the character from Austin Powers. The. The. The big guy.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Get in my belly.

[B]

That's okay. That's probably far off from like actual accent.

[A]

If that's apparently his true Michael Myers Families from Scotland. I'm pretty sure that's where he's.

[B]

What country has the highest population of redheads? I'm pretty sure it's Scotland or it's Greenland, one of the two. Ireland. It's exactly what I said, wasn't Ireland. 13% of the population has natural red hair. It's the highest percentage of the world. Close behind is Scotland, which is 10%. Both countries have a very high percentage of people carrying the MC1R gene variant associated with red hair, even if they don't have red hair themselves. Globally, redheads are rare. Only 1% of the world's population.

[A]

Yeah, I was going to say.

[B]

Can you. Thirteen, could you. I want to go there. I want to.

[A]

I mean, you're just gonna.

[B]

I've never been in a room with more than maybe two people are gonna

[A]

be like, where's Jen?

[B]

Blend in.

[A]

Blend in. Wow.

[B]

Wild. I think about that, and I think about, like, sitting in a college class in the big riser rooms. We're at like 400 seats. Like, 400. And I'm the only redhead in the entire room that's, like, stuff out. Every once in a while I look around and I'm like, there's no one with red hair in this whole entire room of 400 people. Like to be in street seeing multiple redheads, I think I would just laugh. I'd, like, geek out. It's like I've never seen it before. You don't think about it the same way because you don't understand. But, like, when someone doesn't have your same hair color ever, like, you notice them. When I'm in Walmart and I see one, I'm like, no. And then we, like, look at each other and it's like a flirty thing, and then we stop. I don't know what to tell you. It's weird.

[A]

Is it like the, you know, jeeps have their wave. When people have jeeps, they're supposed to wave to each other. Motorcycles do that?

[B]

No, I think it's more rare. It's different.

[A]

You guys just have, like a secret head nod, kind of.

[B]

Like, I walked by a little girl who had red hair at. Where was it? Maybe a school or something I was at. And she was, like, looking down and she, like, looked. She was like, like, it is. And I'm like, you. Even from a young age, you're, like, not used to seeing, like, people with your same hair color. It's like a real thing. I'm not kidding.

[A]

So there's just this. There's just like, extended eye contact.

[B]

Yes. It's not a choice. Like, our brain does it. Like, you double take. I don't do that with anything or anyone else. Unless someone was, like, me naked. Okay. I did do that too. Totally. I was, like, mesmerizing. All right, next question. Would you rather. Okay, this is. This is good. Would you rather look like poop or smell like poop? Super Kelsey F. Ask that. Would you rather look like poop or smell like poop?

[A]

I mean, like, physically look like poop. Like a giant walking poop emoji.

[B]

Like a turd.

[A]

Be kind of awesome, because then you'd Everyone be like, there's the poop guy. You probably have a lot of jobs on TV and things like that. You would be. You would have a lot of opportunities for that. Whereas smelling like poop, no one will. No one would want you.

[B]

No one.

[A]

That's not really something because it's like,

[B]

you look like a normal person that just doesn't bathe.

[A]

Really stink like you poop. Now here's. Here's the hack is like, I would carry a fake baby around with me all the time, and people would be like, oh, he's just dirty diaper guy. That would be my hack. If you had. If you had to do it.

[B]

Dirty diaper guy,

[A]

dude, that guy's kid

[B]

stinks all the time. He is neglecting the diaper.

[A]

He's had a newborn for 10 years now.

[B]

It's true, though. Like, I don't. You can't get away with smell, I guess. Sorry. I just smell like.

[A]

No, if it's just looking like poop, you look like a slob. Again, you probably. I don't know. You. It wouldn't want either.

[B]

But what if you're like. No. What if you poop, though?

[A]

You. You can't get away from it.

[B]

No, but what if you're like a tiny little poop ball? Like, when you're dehydrated, you're like, two feet on the ground. You're like a little chicken nugget, and

[A]

I'd rather smell like poop.

[B]

Really?

[A]

I don't want to be a. I

[B]

mean, there's a lot of specifics.

[A]

Again, the work. Your work. By being a physical poop, like Mr. Hanky, in. In life, you got a lot of job opportunities.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

So there could be worse things limiting. That's all I would say.

[B]

Gosh, I don't want to pick.

[A]

Jen would choose both.

[B]

I guess. I. I guess I'd rather smell like poop. And I would just, like, douse myself. Perfume. What? You can't get away from it. Okay.

[A]

Literally.

[B]

That makes sense.

[A]

All you're gonna smell like is if you walked around with a big turd and put your perfume on it. What is.

[B]

It's gonna smell, I guess either way, if you walk around looking like poop and you can't do anything about it, you probably. I mean, finding someone to be with you and 24 7, if you constantly smell like poops, probably not happening. So at that point, I'd rather just be a celebrity. Little walking poop.

[A]

And again. Or you just have, like, missed, like, if you're slobbish. That's why you say look like poop. Like I look like poop in the morning. You know you say that.

[B]

No, I'm thinking. I'm thinking they, like, do you literally want to look like a turd or do you want to smell like a turd? I guess I'm gonna look like.

[A]

It changes the context.

[B]

So are we gonna. We're both poops. If you're poop, I'm a poop.

[A]

There you go. We're both poops.

[B]

And then we'll get married and we'll be. So we're. The fame will be.

[A]

Poop Happens. That'd be our show Happens.

[B]

I think we could work on that title. It's a working title.

[A]

It'll be S Happens. But it's. That's. That would be the name of the show, but I changed it to Poop Happens. S Happens.

[B]

How about, like, the Turd Ricks?

[A]

Ah, there you go.

[B]

Keeping up with the Turd Ricks. Stupid.

[A]

I hope that's actually happening. That's the name of the show, and I hope we actually wanted to solve. I hope that's picked up by some sort of fake news person with all the other fake news articles.

[B]

Oh, you.

[A]

That we've been picked up with Keeping up with the Turd Ricks.

[B]

Please write about it.

[A]

It's coming next year. That's actually why we're taking the summer off.

[B]

Yeah. This episode of you, me, and Mike is brought to you by Cozy Earth. You know that question, who actually creates the comfort that makes the house feel like home? And I think if you were to ask most people that question, they're probably going to tell you, it's Mom. It's the person who's making sure everything is cozy and taken care of in all of those little everyday moments. And that's why I love Cozy Earth so much, because everything they make is designed around those moments you don't always think about. But you use them constantly. For me right now, it's their towels, their sheets I've always loved, and their cuddle blanket. The towels are one of those things that sounds very small, but it Definitely does make a difference in your day. They're super soft, they're really absorbent, and they actually stay that way. You don't wash them one time and then regret the purchase. They just feel really good every single time you use them. And the Cuddle blanket is always at the foot of our bed. It's lightweight but still cozy, so you can use it year round. And it's one of the things I grab at night, really, without even thinking about it. It's just one of those brands where everything feels made specifically to make your home feel better and cozier in those small ways. Which is why it also makes a great Mother's Day gift, because it's something she'll actually use every single day. So if you want to try it out, go to cozyearth.com backslash redhead and use code REDHEAD for 20% off your order. Again, that's C O Z Y E a r t h.com backslash r e d H E A D and use code REDHEAD for 20% off.

[A]

How do you handle different life goals and prioritize? Let's try that. What word again. How do you keep up with different life goals and priorities in your marriage? How to compromise without resentment. That is from Nevermot. N V E R M O N T.

[B]

I think we both have the same life goals, wouldn't you say?

[A]

Right? I mean, long. Yeah, I mean, I think most of our goals, short term one, even long term. Revolve around her family.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Revolve around that structure and our faith and all things like that. That's. That's the common thing as far as sort of like long term goals. Like, I want to get my golf pro card.

[B]

I thought you were going to say your back shots that you need that I do.

[A]

I need to get them done. So you're not going to be able to go pro on golf at the age of 50 by just picking up golf this year, which is. It's a good goal.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Just like you're going to be a tennis pro.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Different goals going to be. Are.

[B]

Thank you. I think those are solid goals.

[A]

But how would you compromise if you have different life goals?

[B]

You hear my stomach.

[A]

I did hear that one. It's like, okay, I think everyone has. Here's the things. I think life goals, hopefully in a marriage are super important. That is going to be hard one, because you're in the long term scheme of things with that partner. And if that person, one person wants to live in Europe after the kids go away and the person's like, no, I'm moving to where my daughter's moving and there's no compromise. That could be a hard thing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

To figure out. And I think if, if that is the goal of, you know, to like retire or get off the grid, the other person is a different thing that probably could cause some friction.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Or, you know, or one person wants to retire early and the person's like, I'm going to work forever. Yeah, that could probably cause friction.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Because they're misaligned. So on the phase, I think, I think, you know, how would you work together to compromise without resentment? You have to go in the mindset that compromise can often create resentment because you have to give something up. So it's like come in the mindset of unselfishness.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And knowing that you're gonna have to give something up just like that other person is that you're never going to be fully getting maybe 100 of what you want. But that's not the goal of the marriage, is about what you want about what you. It's about not what you are, it's about what you are together. That should be the long term goal.

[B]

Right.

[A]

The individual selfishness, the death of that needs to happen in a marriage, in my opinion, because the, when a relationship works best is when it's reborn into something that you're growing together, a life together. Now you have to have your individual likes and desires and wants. That's normal and healthy. It's okay to have your own friends. Like it's. Yeah, that's normal.

[B]

Well, and I think even just like not to make it like faith based. We are Christians, but I feel like the whole calling of what we are as people in a hundred percent, what we're supposed to be as a united front in marriage is putting yourself secondary to others and especially in a marriage. So where. So like if someone wanted to retire and someone didn't, the person who doesn't want to retire is like, I don't want to just wither away and be done with my life. That's boring. So then y', all, I would think we'd come up with a plan of like when you retire, if, you know, if you retire, we are going to have all our days filled out with this, this, this we're going to go, this is what we're going to do. We're going to put an action and that way I think it helps that person kind of jump to the, the life goal, feeling like they're in something still and they're being active versus like quitting Just without a plan. I guess that could be like the compromise, or do they work a little bit longer and then maybe the person's okay traveling with another family member for while the other one wants to try. You know, I feel like there's compromise there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I feel like in order for it to make it happen, both people have to be like, okay, what will I give to meet in the middle? Am I giving them more time before they retire? Am I giving them a promised two years of, like, I'm doing all the trip planning and I'm gonna keep us busy? Like, what's the thing that you're bringing? I always think of, like, bringing something to the table. What is it?

[A]

And I think that's about open dialogue. Especially again, if it is a marriage, which this specifically asks about, like, that's a commitment that's beyond just a early dating relationship. And there's a point where, like, okay, hopefully the dialogue of trust and honesty have to come into place where if somebody has a different priority. Let's just go back to the like. Let's say someone's priority is like, their career is a priority, and the other person's like, well, your family should be your priority.

[B]

Right.

[A]

It could be sometimes perspective where you think that person saying the career is a priority.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But their perspective is, is that I have to work to provide. And if I don't provide for them, then I'm not prioritizing my family.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's finding out, like, basically why you would think that's the priority. And find out if there's a fear behind it. Because, say somebody wants to retire and the person's like, we don't have enough money.

[B]

And it's.

[A]

And that's coming to the point of like, well, if your fear of going off of a fixed income or going off of the savings and selling that. That satisfaction you have going to work and bringing income. It does. I'm sure people in that retirement phase, there's a different level of fear. You probably deal with that, or like, hey, you're in together and you planned it out and you're like, let's go. Yeah, but, you know, there's. I think that's finite. Whether. Whether it's a fear that's. That's holding you back or it's a misunderstanding what that priority is because it might be directed where they think it's in the right one.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And then. And having that dialogue of like, well, you know, way you're doing it, the way this is going, it is so become so far Much. But, like, it's very easy for. I can speak for guys, at least for me, because I am a guy in my mindset. Not all the men, but a lot of men. It's like, we're wired. So much about your career, your progression. Take my generation, Gen X, it's like, work hard, continue to work your butt off. Provide for your family. That is the first priority as a man, a husband, is to bring that to the table, to your family. Now, likewise, having kids a little bit older for me was great as well, because I had the flexibility of spending a lot more time with them. Your career taking off and to be able to have a lot more flexibilities. We have a very different perspective of you working and me working, but both of us having ridiculous amount of flexibility to be there at every moment for our kids, which is blessed beyond anything. I'm grateful for that. Right. Could we have done more with our careers? Well, absolutely.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Well, for sure.

[B]

For sure. I could have.

[A]

Yeah. That's not even.

[B]

I'm like, thinking about, like, I did miss a few things here and there when I was filming, and I was like, this is not okay.

[A]

And you had another season, you'd have another show. There's things that the businesses that we could have done, there's things that we do intentionally slow because the priority, at least for us, is not to have to sprint for the gain of the financial. When it's like, when is enough enough? What is it? Right. And again, I think that if it comes down to the priorities of really understanding that, and I get. I don't know the circumstance that this person would be bringing up, but it's finding out, is, is it a perspective? Is there a real priority misalignment? And if there really is absolute priority misalignment, that's almost like, to me, it's like, that's an intervention type thing. Like, hey, we got to go talk to our counselor about this, because we can't find a common ground on this.

[B]

No, I think it's so simple. There's one word that if you figure out and master how to do it together. I know this is like a bold statement, but I feel like you can conquer anything. I truly feel this. And it's just communication. So it's literally. And I know that sounds easy and, like, cliche, but it's shocking how it's not easy. Or I would say most people. I mean, we even, like, listen to friends and stuff sometimes, and like, they're. The comfortability of just saying exactly how you feel. At any given moment is not there. And it has to be the right time, or they have to be in an okay mood. And that's just so unfortunate, because what I think worked for us. And what is work? What works well if I, like, compare it to other people or if I hear someone talking and I'm like, man, that stinks. And I'm glad you're not. This sounds awful that I'm. I'm not, like, judging them, but I'll hear things. And I'm like, man, that really stinks for them. I'm glad Mike doesn't respond that way. Is kind of like how I think about it is typically when I bring things or all the time, really. Even if it takes, like, a minute for you to sink in and you come back 30 minutes later and you're like, I hear you, and you're right. Is being open to hearing the other person's perspective. Like, I go back to a few years back when I was, like, sat you down. And maybe it was my delivery, too, because I have to, like, think about before I bring up touchy things. I'll even, like, preface it with, like, hey, I don't want you to get mad. I'm not trying to come at this in anger, because I instantly feel like it puts the needle in the balloon and kind of deflates instant, like, puff up with anyone, really, man or woman. But I remember being like, you're working full time. I'm working full time. So why am I the one feeling like I have to juggle all the kids schedule just because I'm the mom? And you were like, but you're not. I'm like, but I am. Because I'm the one thinking about, like, okay, for example, Berkeley has soccer. If we. I have work or some. We have something else. I'm the one that has to figure out, like, the ride or how she gets there. Why is that on me? Why don't you think about that? Remember that? And you were like, I don't know. And I'm like, it's crazy how these gender roles are kind of just that way.

[A]

But it did evolve. I mean, it did evolve to our circumstance. I mean.

[B]

Hold on, let me finish this off real quick. So my point was, is just communicating that the minute I communicated that, not in a mean way of just like, hey, why is it fair that I have to think about that and do what you're doing, which is working full time just because I'm a woman. Like, you were like, no, I get that. I've honestly never really Thought about it and I'm like that's kind of my whole point, you know. And you were like, no, I totally get it. And so since then, Vaughn took on managing Vaughn's schedule and if he had practice or something. Yes.

[A]

Vaughn doesn't manage his own.

[B]

He does not. Yes. He would never be there. Mike. For the most part. Mike, like if Vaughn has a practice, if Vaughn. Anything attached to Vaughn. Mike has to figure out how to get them there. And if he can't get them there, he finds him a ride. Like he is in charge of Vaughn's activities. Whereas I took on the girls. It's definitely the heavier lift because Berkeley does everything under the sun, but. And I manage your girls. And just taking one kid off, I. I looked at him and I'm like, I want to function as a true team. Right. Because you keep saying we're a team and I know we're a team. I know what you mean. We're married and we have a solid marriage. But we're not actually 5050 right now. And I need help because I felt like they were late all the time. We're dropping balls. And don't you say like now that we have like our. What we know what we're doing. It's like a well oiled machine. Yeah. Every day of the week we know what we're supposed to do.

[A]

And it's not like this is like when Jen says it's the Mike does Vaughn, Jen does the girls. It's not like, I mean I.

[B]

We make it to all the games.

[A]

I coach Berkeley's softball team. So there's certain activities that take priority and Jen's always involved the Vaughn stuff and wants to go games. And we'll swap out like you got games at the same time. And I've gone in the last two Vaughns and not to Berkeley's will swap out and take out. And so that way we can still be connected to both. But there's a lot of like that, that concurrent we're in that we're in that absolute chaos season with kids and I know there's other people out there as well. And if you're in place where there's just, I mean so many activities now

[B]

that you know, here's, here's like the perfect example. It's Saturday. We have anywhere from four to six games. If something happens with Vaughn's game, it gets delayed, it gets changed location. I don't even think about it because I know Mike's on it.

[A]

Like that's nice going back. That's I mean, it's really going back to what you said, I think, which was where I appreciate. And I've told a lot of the people that I know. It's the one thing I know with Jen and I appreciate this about you is it's also part of your enneagram. It's part of your personality. It's like the. You're. You're. You don't hold things in. You may not always sugarcoat it and

[B]

it may not be nice.

[A]

No, here's the thing is. But you don't mean it to be mean. I truly never come in an intention to be like, you suck or fix this. And then I do remember that conversation because I was like, yeah, I mean, that's true. Kind of like thinking I was like, okay, because we went from where I was the only one that was working full time.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And then it evolved.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it was like. And the routine kept going after. Well, I'm still busy.

[B]

Yeah, it just kind of happened where I was working full time and still managing all the things as a stay at home mom. And I was like getting so stressed and I was like, wait, this isn't fair. Like, I just woke up one day. Yeah, but you're right, it evolved.

[A]

And.

[B]

And my whole point of the story was like, it's so nice to have a partner I can come to and be like, I'm not attacking you. You're not doing anything wrong. This is how I feel. Can you help me? And that's it. And I think it takes two parties. It takes, let's say, let's just go between our situation, the man Mike being open to one stepping up and freaking helping. Because I'm sorry, but that's part of being a man to me. Being a man.

[A]

As if I don't mind babysitting my kids.

[B]

Wife comes to you and is like, I am drowning. Help me with the kids. What?

[A]

Said, I don't mind babysitting our kids.

[B]

Oh, gosh, we're canceled. We're done. But it.

[A]

That's a joke. That's.

[B]

I'm sorry, this sounds cliche. It takes a real man to be able to be like, yeah, I will help you. I'll do what you need me to do. I don't care if it's typically like your gender role or whatever. It's so stupid. I feel like gender roles are kind of like not what they used to be whatsoever, wouldn't you say? A ton of our friends and families function how we function.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, it's a ton.

[B]

Or the dads are even more present at the school stuff because the mom's working. Like it, it trades off.

[A]

Yeah. I mean I. Look, I, I'm. I know what works for us.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm wouldn't want it any other way. The way that we do things. I know every family has their own dynamics and circumstances. I know people that travel a lot and that's. They are able to do that and that's their, their priorities. And one spouse picks up the slack. The. Mainly the home, the homemaker and homekeeper. And that's a, That's a real job. That is hands down a legitimate full time job.

[B]

I think again, back to. Sorry. Communication is priorities, life goals. I feel like if at any point you feel like you're like surprised by someone's motive or like life goal or whatever, that's not good. I feel like it's a conversation that we talk about all the time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What you just. On any given Tuesday, guys, after the kids go to bed, look at your husband or wife and be like, where do you see your job in like five years? Like we ask those kind of random questions that bring us into like.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think that's not just something you talk about before marriage. Yes. Talk about it before marriage. Oh my gosh. But also know that just because you talk about it in marriage and you agree things drastically shift as you get older and as you have kids and the people can change. And that's not bad.

[A]

I've talked about this in the podcast before. The. The best thing that happened to me was to being turned on for promotion with Abbott.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Was the best because I would have kept chasing that ladder.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And who knows in this thing where like time in your career and whatnot. And I was it. It allowed me to reflect and actually start to kind of re. Think about where I wanted my career to go and what I actually wanted as opposed to chasing the idea of just moving up to move up because that's what you do and that's that whole thing. It's like I'm sure, I mean I was stayed with the company. I'm sure I would have been promoted. Which just like I was ready now. It had to be my timeline. And that was humbling to me. But at the same time reflect it because it did allow, you know, to say is the belief of prayer. To me it's like God does answer your prayers. You know, it doesn't always answer the way you want.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But he answered it exactly how he should have answered it because it led us to this place where we, you. Your career was able to take off. I was the flexibility to be able to be more comfortable in our life through. We had successes prior and then I stepped away and then we explored the entrepreneurial side and it created a lot of ability for us to explore where I believe God's purpose and path has had us through those things. But that changed because my. If you'd asked me that the five, the, you know, four years before that, I'm like, I'm keep going. I want to be, you know, moving up the vice president. Like that would have been my mindset. But things do change and I think the spouses need to talk to each other about like, here's where I'm feeling. Here's how I'm feeling. I remembered, you know, full on hand up. I almost had an emotional breakdown agenda one time in the bathroom. Like, I am not happy with where I'm headed in my career right now.

[B]

Is it in the last house?

[A]

Yeah. I don't even remember that that was in the bathroom. I was like, I don't. I'm like, I cannot keep this up. This is not what I wanted because it was.

[B]

Well, it's good to know emotions don't freak me out after all because I

[A]

don't even remember that that was an emotional. I say that I started with a tongue in cheek. It was more of. I was like, I just.

[B]

I think I have a couple memories

[A]

of you not me going back to Jen, I guess to put a bow on this thing. I agree a thousand percent that it does come down to communication. And the key is, is is if there's two things I would recommend is understand how you communicate and how the communication may be received. And it's go. We've talked about this in the prior podcast. I really, really believe that understanding like your enneagram and your love language, which are two different books and two different ways schools of thought. If you understand how what you are and what, what you know, what archetype you are and what your love languages are. What we often try to communicate how we want to hear it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Not how that other person needs to hear it to be received.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And it takes us to understand that other person if that you understand who that other person is. Like, okay, for me, for example, if there's conflict or things in there, you know, just recently would, you know, we had a disagreement on something and I try to. I say I'm sorry and then I tell. To try to justify and explain what I was doing. But it's how I'M wired because it's not that I'm trying to hurt you. I'm just trying to give you more information.

[B]

To me, it sounded like the apology was fake and it was giving me an experience.

[A]

But it has everything to do because I'm, you know, type. You know, I'm a enneagram 3. I'm a people pleaser. And I'm, you know.

[B]

That's not a people pleaser.

[A]

Well, it's. It's part of it.

[B]

It's an achiever.

[A]

It's an achieve.

[B]

Do you even know you're an Enneagram with the.

[A]

The. The pleaser? It's like the Wing 2, I guess what it is. So it's more emotional based service.

[B]

You're not that.

[A]

But no, it creates a personality that you want to keep peace within. It has all the things on it.

[B]

Enneagram9.

[A]

I know you're missing the thing. You're an achiever. Anyway, you can, you can do this. But it comes down to the point of like, it's. I do have this personality that I want. Again, I didn't look at it. You're like, tell me the fact. Move on. Show it through Action.

[B]

Well, here's my. Another.

[A]

But again, I do want to say this, okay. Knowing those things matter at least help communicate. They open up dialogue for each other and it shows at least you're working towards the understanding of the other person.

[B]

But mine will go a step before that. In order to do that, you're already in the mindset of like caring about the other person and putting the other person before you. And it is probably a staggering percentage of people who are married, but they still have a spouse or themselves who don't put the other one first even though they're married and love each other. And I think, I think we always need to have on like the glasses because I can talk about this. I've had. I've struggled with a bout of resentment just for a tiny bit. That's how the whole blog and my whole career came about. I was definitely struggling with resentment as Mike was getting his master's and I was. Had two kids under two. And I think it's really, really, really important for us to keep the Benefit of the Doubt glasses on at all times. And I think it's like instead of getting so mad to the point of like, you hate this person, you have to give them a benefit of the doubt. They're not trying to hurt you on purpose and be mean. If they are trying to hurt you and be mean on purpose and that's like big issues. Like that's bad.

[A]

Like y' all don't need to be in that relationship.

[B]

It's bad. That's like so mean, you know. But most of us, if somebody has

[A]

intentions, if somebody's intentionally trying to hurt, whether it's physically, emotionally or whatever it may be.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That is not a relationship.

[B]

It's not a good relationship. And most in. My whole point is most people aren't. And so I think all of us struggle with resentment can become a very selfish track of thinking about poor me, only me. He's doing this to me, she's doing this to me. And then we see red. Whereas with resentment, it really is about this person loves me. Why, why do I feel this way? And it's about honestly starting with yourself first. And the life goals too, is like, okay, these are my life goals. He might not share these life goals. But also just having conversations about it, trying to see their perspective and also knowing that that person can change. They could soften, they could also harden. You don't know. But I think just honestly communication, dialogue, talk about it. What we talk, we've done. We've constantly. Not just once every year.

[A]

What are your ex. What you know, what are your expectations?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Whether spoken or unspoken. And things you have to figure out the unspoken expectations people have prior to any relationship, even in relationships. Because you don't know.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

As a society, Western culture is very individualistic. We think about us first. It's the way we're wired.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like we will achieve through hard work and effort. But it's my effort, it's my work. It's all the things that we do. You move out of your parents house, you get your own. That's the whole goal. You want to grind, to go. And you want to create an individual society, individual nature, which in essence is a form of selfishness. Eastern culture, very communal, just is. It's more family. People live a lot longer, a lot with, you know, together longer. There's more community involvement. Not that, you know, Americans aren't. Don't have community, but it is more individualistic. So if we go through life from the time we're children, which are selfish to adolescents, which is super selfish.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. Then into college, where it's about you and your goals and your grades. And then you meet somebody there, you meet somebody afterwards, it's still about you. And then suddenly the first time you're having a compromise is in a real relationship. And if you keep evolving on where it's just about you and you and You.

[B]

It's not even a baby.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I feel like parents are reach. Whenever you have a child, it's the first time you have to truly.

[A]

But that is where I think that's where the shock of it comes in when. When the challenge of parenthood, where people realize, like. And I say this in on full admittance to me, it's like, you don't know how selfish you are until you get married. And they don't realize how selfish you still are until you have your first kid. And they don't even realize how selfish you are until I have your second kid. Right. Third kid. You're. You're pretty much are. You have no more self to give

[B]

at the point you're just tired.

[A]

No, it's true. But I remember when Vivian was. Or Burke was born, I was like, holy crap. Now I'm doing like, I'm. Because you're was like, here's the baby. I have to do like. It's you. You have everything. You start to be taken up and consuming. And the truth is, is it makes you a better person. Your perspective of being selfish, when you give and help other people, it is. It's weird. It's you helping other people. Whether it's your own family, other people. You get so much internal on it. And it's almost like kind of selfish because you're actually getting a lot in return as well, right?

[B]

No, I think God intended that as like a natural incident.

[A]

Like, oh, my gosh, there's so much

[B]

joy in this incentive.

[A]

There's really is a lot of joy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's like, you know, you know people. Again, this is some people that may not have kids out there. It's like. And if you're on the fence, I mean, I say do it, but. Because it literally is.

[B]

We don't know them. Don't say that.

[A]

No, I mean, kids are. They.

[B]

Kids are awesome, but. Okay, we need to go on to the next one because we spent like 30 minutes on this one. That was a good one. And obviously there's a lot of different avenues on that one topic.

[A]

Did you read that one?

[B]

You read that one? If you could swap lives with each other, what would be the first thing you would do as each other? Courtney LP12. Oh, I'm going first. I'm gonna go outside and pee. Just kind of curious. We're swapping bodies, right? Oh, swap lives.

[A]

You just want to see what it is to stand up and be outside.

[B]

I'm thinking we're swapping bodies. I'm gonna go outside. I'M gonna pee standing up because I'm curious. I just want to see how it feels. I want to do that. 2. I'm gonna go lift as heavy as your body will allow me because I'm. I'm not able to lift that heavy. Okay. I'm gonna go swing a golf club. Even if I'm really sucky at it with your body, I'm gonna do it.

[A]

Yep, me too. I'm gonna go pee outside. See what it feels like to have to wipe your bottom with a leaf. I just want to know what that feels like.

[B]

I'm just picturing me just butt naked squatting in the backyard. Okay.

[A]

Yeah. I'm gonna. I'm gonna put on makeup. Sure.

[B]

He's gonna be out here having me looking like a clown. Like a roadie. Actual rodeo clown. I'm gonna go somewhere late at night and not look behind my back when I walk around. I'm just gonna walk.

[A]

I'm gonna do the same thing because I know you should put your head.

[B]

As my dad said.

[A]

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go into a bar and see what happens. So how many drinks I can get for free. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna go to lady. I'm going to ladies night.

[B]

Yeah, you are. With my body. Don't do anything crazy.

[A]

That's true.

[B]

Respect my body, please.

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I don't. I wouldn't do anything because I would come back.

[B]

No. You know what he'd do? He'd just sit on the couch.

[A]

Probably grab my boobs.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Probably touch my butt a lot and grab my boobs. That's probably the deal. That's pretty awesome. I would do that.

[B]

What else would I do? This is. I would.

[A]

Honestly. I would definitely touch my boobs. I know that. Probably the beer. The first thing I would do.

[B]

Yeah. And then I. Yeah, I just want to go. I'm trying to think of, like.

[A]

And I would.

[B]

Then I would like something men experience that I.

[A]

You get kicked in the nuts. See what that feels like.

[B]

Oh. Want to go get a vasectomy? That way I can be like. That was freaking. Not that hard.

[A]

You all are freaking hard.

[B]

So you're getting a. I said the.

[A]

I said the vasectomy was like going to the dentist. It wasn't. It was just weird. It was uncomfortable.

[B]

No, you were. You were fine. But there's a lot of out there.

[A]

Dude, it's. It did suck.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Sitting like, it felt like as if I told you.

[B]

No, it's a cut.

[A]

No, it's not laser cut. No. Yes, but. But it feels like somebody blasted you in your ball sack and you had the residual pain about like four minutes afterwards. And it just stays. It's kind of gone, but it's there.

[B]

How many, how long does it stay?

[A]

Two days.

[B]

Oh, it's worse than.

[A]

It's worse than childbirth.

[B]

Oh, two days of uncomfort.

[A]

It's where is uncomfortable.

[B]

Help us.

[A]

We had a friend, he went and mowed his lawn and had elephantitis of his ball sack.

[B]

Remember they said don't do that.

[A]

Okay, well that happened. So that probably feels awful. I don't want that. I didn't have that happen. So I sat on the couch, played video games. That was actually glorious.

[B]

That was actually a really good question. I like that question.

[A]

The biggest tip for getting into social media as a job. That one's from Blooming Acre. Wait, at Blooming Acre?

[B]

Say it again.

[A]

The biggest tips for getting into social media as a job. That's from at Blooming Acre.

[B]

Okay. I would say start on Tick Tock.

[A]

You know, even right now, I mean,

[B]

I suppose tick tock and YouTube.

[A]

Honestly, I don't you want my advice be you don't focus on the algorithms. Put the stuff out there. If you make really great content, people are going to find it. You obviously have to have some business strategy about it, but if you over grind and try to do it just for the algorithm, you're going to end up chasing a bunch of followers who really probably don't give a crap about you. And you need to just put out really good content, keep grinding away, find people that want to support you, other people in the same level of following and work with them. And do that without having to like think about the anxiety of just trying to like every moment thinking about it, just having to be a job.

[B]

That's what I've never wanted. I know whenever it starts to feel like job, like that's when I'm like, okay, I'm going to do a little less for a minute. Like because it's. I never want it to feel like a job even though it is a job. I would say definitely be you. I would say hot, hot take. I would say do not do any brand deals until you're a certain size. Like a certain size following. I would say just focus on finding your people, have fun content. I am a little biased because that's how I did it. And I did that for four years before I took my first brand deal. And it honestly helped. I had, I had found a large group of people and so I, there was just a lot of good things. I instantly started being able to be extremely picky with brands because the amount I do is a fraction of what gets put across my desk. And that's a blessing to not have to take brands that I don't want to work with because I skipped it. So I would say do it like build your, build your community and then just be patient and the brands and that will always be there.

[A]

I think do it later. I think people that think it's going to happen quick, it's like, it's sort of like the, you know, the get rich quick schemes are like, oh, you just got to do this and you're to follow my book. You're going to get rich quick. And if somebody's telling you that probably not true, you're not going to sell a book on it. Because it is about consistency. It's like running it. If you run it like a business, you got to.

[B]

Mike has a lot of opinions on Bing.

[A]

I do, I know I'm not a social media but I would say if you're going to watch it and you look at it as a business, it's like any other job that you're going to do.

[B]

If you do, I treat it as a nine.

[A]

If you do it as if you do. Well, when I started, when you, when

[B]

you did bigger than 9 to 5

[A]

probably, I mean before you were even

[B]

8 to 6 every day you're writing

[A]

blog posts, you would post them at certain. Because you were writing a lot at the time. You're writing a lot.

[B]

Well, that's blogging days. I'm even talking about when I first started my Instagram. Oh my gosh, it was full time, non stop grinding every single day. Didn't stop for lunch. Had a brand new newborn and I loved it. I thought it was so fun again,

[A]

wasn't making any money stories, it was all real time. That if, if you build it on a lie, if you build it on something fake, you have to keep up that fake. That's kind of, that's going to be the most exhausting thing in the world ever. I would actually agree with jen. I think YouTube and, and I think YouTube is probably the longest, most sustainable one. Very hard to break into something you

[B]

can get on TikTok.

[A]

You can mark. Yeah, you can market on TikTok now. Instagram's still not going anywhere. Facebook has its place for business and stuff but it's, you know, pick your Platform, work with other people that are going to help you grow, be authentic. And, you know, even if it's. You want to show how to repair a car, there's a need for that. There's a thing to do. Just do it in your voice.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

And also be realistic that if you work for it and it's not growing and not grinding, it's so, you know, doesn't mean give up. Maybe you got to pivot.

[B]

I also don't think it's everyone's journey. I hate to say it like that. It sounds like, awful to say because it is my journey. I'm not trying to be like that. Everyone can try. But the cold, hard truth is, like, I could sit here and be like, yes, I did this, or I could say how I actually feel, which is, I got lucky. I got in at the right time. Yes. I put a lot of work and effort into it. Do I feel like other things like personality and content to do with it? 100. I do. But I also think I got very lucky. I rode the wave when it first started, before it was even a job. And right now it's so hard. It's much harder to get into for people starting out because it's so saturated. Everyone wants to do it. And so we could talk.

[A]

I mean, if you.

[B]

I'm just trying to be real about it. There's a.

[A]

Listen to last week's episode. You talked a lot about that.

[B]

There's luck in there. There's luck. And I think in my story, there's a lot of luck in it as well. And timing. And it was a blessing.

[A]

Opportunity.

[B]

Opportunity.

[A]

You know, God. I look at that as God. There will be opportunities that God will put in front of you, and it is up to us to walk through it. And those opportunities are there.

[B]

It's true.

[A]

And sometimes, you know, what's the gosh, I'm thinking of the. The analogy or the paraphrase? It's like luck favors the ready. Right. I mean, you just. So it's like, that makes sense. Right? So if you're always ready.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A little luck's gonna. Seems to come your way more because you've already prepared for it. You've already been ready and.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That opportunity to call it luck.

[B]

You think I'm still ready? Yeah, I think I'm kind of slow now. I'm not as ready. Like, I'm kind of ready.

[A]

Doesn't mean anything.

[B]

Tired. Trying to, like, keep up with the kids schedules. I'm like, less actually sounds awesome. So does that make me Less ready. No, I still think I'm highly motivated, like, as a person. I'm not saying I'm not, but. Okay. Anyways, you're. Is it me or you?

[A]

It's you.

[B]

Me. Would you rather get a root canal or colonoscopy? Colonoscopy by his curly girl.

[A]

Colonoscopy 100.

[B]

I kind of want to know what's going on in there.

[A]

Anyway, I have to get one this year. Fifty.

[B]

Can I watch?

[A]

Why?

[B]

I just want to see how you

[A]

want to operate the camera.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

They do.

[A]

They actually use, like, a iPhone now. They just kind of shove it in there.

[B]

They don't. I just get a piece, and she can cut this out.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You both know the prep for cologne.

[A]

Yeah, I do. I've been through one.

[B]

You can't eat.

[A]

I'll talk about that. You don't crap your pants. You crap in the toilet. Charity, keep this in. I don't know if you hear. Hear Haley over there popping off about how the prep work.

[B]

My mom had one.

[A]

Yeah. You drink this. You drink, basically, a medicine that makes it clears you out, and you have, like, explosive liquid poop for a couple times until the point where you're literally pooping. Clear. That's what they want to get.

[B]

Until your root canal is nothing. They numb your mouth, and you're done within like, an hour and a half. But I also want to gain the knowledge of my.

[A]

But then you have. But you have a root canal. You have pain. You got your mouth. You're dealing with, like, it's all packed. It can get infected.

[B]

Yeah. I would rather put a camera up your butt. Yes.

[A]

You were put under. You're. You have anesthesia, and then you walk out, and it's not like you.

[B]

Again, guys, I want to know what's going on up there. I'm really in it for the data and knowledge.

[A]

Hey, we could. We can f. I mean, look, I. Like I said, it's my 50th. They actually do recommend at 45, just so people know, they changed the guideline. So at above 45, you are recommended to get a colonoscopy. And now it's at fif. You know, I think 50. It's every five years.

[B]

But I'm kind of excited to see how it looks up there for you.

[A]

It's. It looks.

[B]

It's a new.

[A]

It looks like. Like, I don't know, like, your hand inside. It's just you. It looks like inside your mouth kind of.

[B]

Well, I haven't gotten to explore that part of you, and so I'm excited to do it from a camera.

[A]

Cool.

[B]

Not gonna do anything around that butthole without a. A barrier lens.

[A]

That was a good. That was a nice short one. After that, colonoscopy for the win.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

That's your question. Yeah. What are the fave ways to connect? What are your fave ways to connect during this phase of life? Busy with kids. That's from Trisha17 at Trisha17. What are your fave ways to connect with fave ways? I don't say that's literally what it's written.

[B]

It's because they're trying to keep.

[A]

What are your favorite ways to connect during this phase of life? Busy with kids.

[B]

Tv. I like watching our shows. I don't think that's bad. Is that bad?

[A]

No, not me and you. Is it mean? Yeah. For us.

[B]

Yeah. To stay connected. Right.

[A]

I thought.

[B]

Give me the card.

[A]

I thought it may be with whole family.

[B]

No, it's.

[A]

I read it. Okay, that's. I thought you meant, like, let's get the family and watch TV together.

[B]

No, me and you.

[A]

A little. Little chill time.

[B]

That's what we do. We watch tv.

[A]

I prefer the. Right after TV activities, so.

[B]

All right.

[A]

But I also like vacationing with you a lot. I think that's a lot of fun.

[B]

Don't we only do that, like, once a year together without the kids?

[A]

Yeah. I mean. But I mean, even going on vacation, going with the kids, going to stuff.

[B]

Yeah. Oh. We go through phases. So, like, we. Oh, my gosh. We go through games. So last year, we went and visited my grandma at her place, and we played hand and foot for a few hours with her. And so then we were on a big hand and foot craze. We did that for, like, two months every night together. And then now we're in the mahjong phase. So we play mahjong together.

[A]

Maj.

[B]

But it's either maj or TV time. I mean, the. We talk. We talk while we're, like, getting ready. So, like, I'm taking off my makeup and getting dressed. That's what we're having.

[A]

I get all the tennis updates.

[B]

He loves it. He loves the tennis updates for.

[A]

Well, even if I didn't, I would get them.

[B]

Yes. That's his current state. Yes. And so we talk. And then. Well, to put it this way, at the end of every single night, we put the kids into bed. We both go into our bedroom because we're upstairs with the kids, and then

[A]

we both chill for a second.

[B]

We chill, and we're like, what do we want to do tonight. And like, one night out of the week, I'll be like, I have shows I want to watch. Can you please go play video games with your friends? And then he goes and plays video games with his friends. But every other night, we're like, do you want to watch a show? Do you want to play mahjong? That's pretty much all right. That's what we're doing right now. We TV or we match together. We have shows we watch.

[A]

We've been into oil painting, so I've been doing that.

[B]

That's lies. He's so lying. He's like, man, we sound boring with this TV and Maja, but how can we spice this up? But that's a cold, hard truth. We are watching shows.

[A]

Yeah, we've been. We've been doing organic farming in the backyard.

[B]

Okay, next question.

[A]

Which, by the way, we watched that show on Netflix, which is surprisingly funny from Zach El.

[B]

This is a gardening show.

[A]

It's surprisingly funny and weirdly educational.

[B]

Yeah, it's really good. I like it.

[A]

So, yeah, now I want. We could do an organic farm. And then a little girl, she goes, I want to make a garden. Yeah, I want to do a garden. No, I said he would love it.

[B]

Tomatoes. That's what I said.

[A]

I mean, it would be. We have a mulberry tree, which is pretty awesome. Like, the kids do love it. They're like, oh, it's like. It's like a snack.

[B]

Okay, next question. What other kids names did y' all have picked out? I love your kids names by Kayla Berkey.

[A]

What was the first?

[B]

Thank you, Kayla. What are some other kids names y' all had picked out? Oh, we didn't have a ton. We kind of used what we had. Yeah.

[A]

Your first, thankfully. No, look, I can actually. I don't want to say this is any. Because the kids names of that. That's awesome. Every kid becomes a name. One name that I wasn't.

[B]

But say it correctly.

[A]

Well, gentlemen, Jag. Jaeger.

[B]

Not Jaeger. Like Jaeger bombs.

[A]

Jaeger.

[B]

Jagger.

[A]

No, you were saying Jaeger.

[B]

Never in my life would I say Jaeger that word, because it would have

[A]

come out Jagger to me.

[B]

Jagger.

[A]

Jagger. Jagger.

[B]

So I like.

[A]

It would sound like jogger if I was selling saying it. That wasn't my favorite name. However, it is kind of a cool name.

[B]

Well, you're lying. Just to be nice right now.

[A]

It's cool. It's coolish name. Look at every name that kid becomes. It's that person. I've never met a person like the kid's name was like wallpaper. Be like, oh, that's cool.

[B]

No, I'll admit I'm glad we didn't go Jagger. I will say that. I'm glad.

[A]

Maddox was cool name.

[B]

Maddox was another one I liked, but that was super popular when Vaughn was

[A]

born, because that's where we. We were on Maddox Road when we.

[B]

Yeah, his townhomes on Maddox Road. So it, like, tied to that, too.

[A]

Lucas was a name that I liked.

[B]

I didn't like Lucas for Lucas Mucus,

[A]

but I liked Lucas because it's a family name.

[B]

Mike also wanted to name Von Michael, which was absolutely never, ever being entertained. And it was a fight.

[A]

My dad's name is Michael as well. I'm very junior because of different middle names. And I was like, oh, we'll kind of keep that tradition. And I got squashed. But it's fine, actually. It's fine because I couldn't find. No, it is fine. Fun, you know, it is totally fine.

[B]

My thing was I just wanted him to be his own person, and I didn't want another confusing of who's Mike and Michael? And then. But they're not junior or senior because they don't have the same middle name. It's just. Then why do that? I don't get that. No offense, Sue. Hey, so I didn't want to do that.

[A]

Well, now one of our kids gets to name the kid Michael if they want, and there's no confusion. It's going to be great.

[B]

It's gonna be great.

[A]

So then what else? For. For the girls, Berkeley came pretty quickly.

[B]

Berkeley was going to be Emerson or Emmy.

[A]

That's right. I like that name.

[B]

I did, too. It's very popular, though, around her age as well. But I did like lots of Emersons. Emerson and Emmy. So ultimately, I'm still good with our choice. She became Berkeley.

[A]

You wanted Tyler.

[B]

I wanted Tyler for Vivi. Vivi was gonna.

[A]

I liked Vivi. So that was.

[B]

So Vivian came down to two names. It was either Tyler or Tyler Kate or Vivian Kate. Vivi Kate. And so I let Mike choose because I pretty much steamrolled Vaughn in Berkeley and said, that's what we're naming our kids.

[A]

If people have heard this, you probably might hear the story. Vaughn was a name. The day we found out Jim was pregnant in California, we were at this pottery place, and there was a little boy running around. The mom was like, vaughn, he's being naughty.

[B]

Yeah, for sure.

[A]

She's like. She's like, what was his name? I think you even asked.

[B]

I did Ask.

[A]

She's like, oh, my gosh, that's a really cool name. I'm like, that's a cool name.

[B]

No, Mike did not like the name. But I held strong and we did.

[A]

Well, I have a different memory.

[B]

You do. You did not like that name.

[A]

Somehow convinced myself that that is not the way I wanted. And my response was, I agree.

[B]

To be fair, I think. Yeah. That's not actually not how it went. To be fair, though, I don't think you, like, hated it. You were just like, let's just keep thinking.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You, like, wanted more options. Yeah.

[A]

Because I like names that have meaning.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I wanted to make sure there was a good meaning behind it.

[B]

I broke you of that.

[A]

Well, that's good. And V A U G H and literally meets translates to little. And I was like, oh, great. I'm already shorter than average, man. That's gonna be awesome. He is my genetics. If you look that up and you're like, mucus. So Von had the. It was a Nordic meaning that it was of light. I'm like, yeah, that's right. That's awesome. I love that. Or in German, it just means of. And his middle name is Michael, so it's of Michael, which is also true.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. That's, like, narcissistic. He just. I could tell him anything. And as long as, like, he believes

[A]

I ought to have a story behind it, he's gonna. I gotta have a story. It feels better.

[B]

Did not about the meaning. I'm like, I just like the name. And they're going to be who they are.

[A]

The meaning. Beautiful birch field. And I was like, oh, that's tree. Tree, field. Or it's like multiple. Yes. But yeah, I was like, it's. That's one of the most beautiful trees. What is the house thing to splurge or skip on? And that is from Ashton's O5 at Ashton's 05. Great question. General answer that I would say splurge on your backyard.

[B]

I mean, that is a good one. But I was not thinking that. I was thinking you splurge on the stuff you want in your kitchen. Because we, like, are 75 of the houses. Like, we're in the kitchen.

[A]

The backyard thing I'll have to find. We spend back there.

[B]

Oh, my gosh, we love it.

[A]

We had a place that grass would not grow, so we actually put some turf back there and we use it all the time.

[B]

I will say, when you have a good outdoor space or good can be different things, but whatever you feel like makes it Nice and special. Small, big, well decorated, not decorated, but houses, pets or bird, whatever like brings you joy. I feel like it encourages a healthier lifestyle naturally because you want to be out there and use that space. Whereas if you have a yard that's decrepit and there's weeds and you can't even like walk outside because it's, I don't know, inhibited by something, you stay inside and so it's like not as healthy, you know.

[A]

Here's a hot take. If you're in the south and you can't go in the sun out in the summer without start on fire like in Texas.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A pool is a game changer and they're horrible. Like what the one thing is, I remember back early when we first started buying homes was like a pool is such a bad investment, you're never going to get your money back. And there's probably a little bit of truth.

[B]

It's a quality of life.

[A]

But how it comes down to the quality of life and memories you create. The amount of times that we've done things, just being outside with our kids and having something for them to do. Obviously different phase of life. If you're, you know, I would get

[B]

an above ground pool. I would get whatever could help. Like whatever could be done.

[A]

The kitchen. What do you skip on? What's the skip on? Like don't bother. Not worth it.

[B]

I don't spend a lot of money on light fixtures and any kind of fixtures. Like upstairs areas that are just like for the kids or the family.

[A]

Oh you mean like the spare bedrooms.

[B]

Our upstairs bedrooms have like 100 fans.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[B]

Everywhere she's.

[A]

Jen would spend the place where she invested for good lighting would be like the, the, the main rooms, the, the kitchen where you have gas. Like where there's guests and it's more the thing. But yeah, like all the kids rooms have super basic. They're like stock stuff. They look fine though.

[B]

It's fine.

[A]

They look fine. Just no one cares.

[B]

No one.

[A]

The kids don't care.

[B]

I would say if you're asking me like for a budgetary reason, I would say in the main areas is where you put your money because that's where you spend most of your time and where you have guests over. And then in the bedrooms it's like why.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

No, that's just me.

[A]

Yeah. And from a, from an investment standpoint, if you're investing in say you're in your first home and you're doing it, don't bother with hardwood floors. Get lvp, don't over invest, don't over invest money quickly. You can, because then, because as long as it's saved, you're going to update your floors and they're old, super old tiles. Get the right, get a manufactured wood. It's another moment. They are real wood. You're going to save a ton. They can lay down. It'll save you labor. At the end of the day, the people that aren't going to buy it aren't going to pay the premium for real hardwood floors.

[B]

Well, the real estate, that's where like the real estate knowledge comes into play. Whereas like you have to know, you have to know your market and where you are in your price point. And then you need to put things in your home that look nice but are within what people would buy lvp.

[A]

And they look so many of these things you like. They look incredible, they look great.

[B]

But the sad truth is like you can do all the things you want. You can put in the fancy hardware, you can put a restoration hardware, lighting or, you know, other things. I'm like, why am I not thinking of other light sources right at the second? You can do all those things and it will look phenomenal. But the problem is, is you might have made a $200,000 home into a $500,000 home, but it's not going to sell for that whether you think it or not, because people will go off of what's around it. So you will out price yourself of a neighborhood. Why would they buy there when they can go three neighborhoods down where all the homes are 500 plus and it's a different feel. So like, and another thing is, is like it goes the other way. If you're renovating a million dollar plus home, you need to put things to that caliber. Otherwise the buyers will walk through it and be like, this is not what is this like, it's. Every buyer in that price point has a mindset and it. That's so factual and it's so true and so being really smart whenever you're.

[A]

Yeah. But if you want, if you're going to update your kitchen, new paint.

[B]

We did that for the show though. Like we literally would be like, this is over investing we love. And so we would tell them, they'd be like a couple people were like, I don't care. This is. We're dying here.

[A]

And there's a couple and that's fine as well.

[B]

100. We were in a neighborhood with homes for like 200, 300,000 and they literally had like the most stunning porcelain throughout their Entire kitchen. I was like, this is way over what they'll probably ever get back. But they wanted.

[A]

They're staying there because it's their home and there's. There's the mat. But if you're going to do something like increase value and I don't know if that's the purpose of it, but like, if your home is nice and you're happy with it and you're just trying to keep up the Joneses, probably better places to spend your money. But if you're doing something like functional that really is there, you got like you a new. Just new paint on your cabinets, a new backsplash and. And count the proper stone. You can do that on a pretty affordable budget. You kind of not having to do all customs.

[B]

I kind of think of like your first and second home. You've got to think of it as a really smart investing game. This is not your forever home. So anything that you're buying to up this home needs to be something you can take with you into your forever home. Everything else has a price tag limit and you need to know that and you need to have information. So if you're going to go. It sounds like you're disconnecting from your house. No, not what I'm saying at all. You need to love it, need to enjoy it. But again, if you are not dying in this house and you will sell, congratulations, you're in a game right now. And you're going to try to get as much money out of this home as possible as it appreciates in value. And you do not want to overstep that. Otherwise you're going to go into your second home with less money than you did potentially.

[A]

Yeah. Unless again, it's a game then. Actually, I agree with that. But it funnily contradicts exactly what I said earlier. Like, get a pool. Let me get the right kind of pool. I suppose. Because I love it. I mean, that's the thing is.

[B]

Well, no, we weren't talking about the forever home at that point. Versus.

[A]

But even. But there's a lot of people that aren't in that forever home.

[B]

No. All right.

[A]

Yeah, good answer.

[B]

That was a lot of good questions. Thank you so much for submitting. We even have some that we haven't gotten to, so we'll save it for the next season. But it has been an amazing season one.

[A]

It's a good season.

[B]

I like it. Season two. What an amazing season.

[A]

1.5.

[B]

1.75 season two. Thank you all so much for listening. Again, we will not Be taking another two year break. We're going to be taking a few months off for the summer. We jump back on. If you have not listened to every single episode of you, me and Mike, we now have like over 40 episodes. I promise you're not. You don't have to listen to them in order. We cover topics really season one goes really deep into like our personal story, how we met our life goals, problems we've had, how my business started, how our businesses started. Until you can really catch back up with that whole catalog of stuff that we have.

[A]

I just flipped through a few of the ones because there are a lot of questions that were submitted, which is awesome. There's some really good ones here. Yeah, we gotta start. You almost start the next season out with some of these ones because these are really good questions.

[B]

Yeah, for sure.

[A]

I like these questions.

[B]

Well, cheers.

[A]

This is a lot of fun. Yeah. Thanks Jen. I appreciate it. And thank you everyone for following.

[B]

Touch your fingers pink.

[A]

Thanks everyone for following along. Keep following along, catch up the old episodes if you haven't and have a great early summer.

[B]

Yes. Happy summer. If you have any questions or topics you want us to cover or guests you want us to have on for season three. We said we were going to do more guests and we didn't. We did one. We did one. Jane Latman. That was a really good episode. At least I thought so. But if you have any questions, comments or concern, please email you, me and Mike. No wait. Please email you me and Mike podcast gmail.com. we do. Check those emails. Thanks again for listening.

[A]

Shout out to Haley and Charity for all the hard work they've put into this as well to make it successful.

[B]

And Andrew and we, yeah, we got three people constantly working on making this podcast happening from filming, editing, producing, getting brands on sponsors for the video. So it's definitely a small group effort, but a group effort nonetheless and like it that way. So thank you for listening so we can actually make this possible and keep recording cuz it really does bring us a lot of joy.

[A]

I love it.

[B]

Yeah, very fun. Picks me up well, cheers to almost summer. Happy summer guys. And we will catch you on season three of you, me and Mike.

[A]

Or as Alexa says, catch on the flippity flop.

[B]

Catch you on the flippity flop. Bye guys.

[A]

Sam,