Kurt Metzger - Episode #405 - "YOUR WELCOME" with Michael Malice

Transcript

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Michael Malice (0:30)

Folks, my new graphic novel, Unwanted, a tall tale of the old Westland new wave is out for pre order now. I've been working on this for 25 years. It's a dark comedy with a shiny exterior. Please check it out@unwantedbook.com. Good afternoon. Michael Malice here. Let that be a welcome for the next hour. You're in for a crazy treat. I had two days, excuse me, of food poisoning. So I was delirious. And I woke up this night for the first night I had two nights, was woken up four or five times with crazy dreams. So I was a little loopy. So we have the perfect guest, my dear friend Kurt Metzger. You see him in a Jimmy Dore show. If he's in your town doing stand up, you have to go see him.

Kurt Metzger (1:39)

And an aspiring astronaut, respected, aspiring lifestyle judge. I respect Judge Fluencer.

Michael Malice (1:47)

A cosmonaut.

Kurt Metzger (1:48)

I live in a judge house.

Michael Malice (1:49)

The reason I want to have you on right away is because we talked. I mentioned you on Rogan about the Epstein stuff. Before we get to that, we were just talking about the Challenger, which was in 1985, I believe. And I was yelling at you because you're in your NASA hat. And I said, you should be drinking a Sprite. Because the joke was, why does NASA drink Sprite? Because they couldn't get seven up.

Kurt Metzger (2:07)

And I said, that's a conspiracy. No. Yeah, well, but you were. How old are you? Close to my age, right?

Michael Malice (2:12)

Yeah. 85. So I was like nine.

Kurt Metzger (2:14)

Yeah, so, yeah, so I was in second or third grade, right. And we had the Every and the Weekly Reader.

Michael Malice (2:20)

That's right.

Kurt Metzger (2:21)

And then we have reading groups of like. So. And then you'd name your group like one was the. You know, like that. And boy, they would just spam us with. It was like this fucking North Korean propaganda for kids about like, we're putting a teacher in space. Well, can you believe it? A teacher.

Summary

YOUR WELCOME with Michael Malice
PodcastOne – Episode #405 (Kurt Metzger)
Date: March 4, 2026

Episode Overview

Michael Malice sits down with comedian, writer, and provocateur Kurt Metzger for a freewheeling and deeply subversive conversation, touching on everything from propaganda (both North Korean and American), transhumanism, the Epstein files, mind control, autism and the spectrum, U.S. foreign policy, conspiracy, and cultural programming. The discussion is punctuated by the pair’s signature irreverence and call-outs to pop culture, skepticism toward mainstream narratives, and sharp observations about power, media, and morality.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Childhood Propaganda, Challenger Disaster & North Korea

[01:49–04:41]

Recollection of the Challenger explosion and its impact on children; compulsory school broadcasts compared to North Korean-style emotional mobilization.
- Malice uses this to draw distinctions between American and North Korean propaganda (in the DPRK, only Kim Jong Il is a "character" in the state narrative).
Commentary on the normalization of trauma via media and the possible subconscious messaging (“twilight language” and NLP techniques).
"They need you to feel this way right now." – Metzger [02:38]
The dark humor and cultural critique frames the Challenger explosion as both a real tragedy and a programmed media trauma.

NLP, Hypnotic Language & Cultural Programming

[05:13–10:31]

Metzger and Malice discuss TV, media, and politics using “twilight language” and NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) techniques to manipulate the public.
Malice: “If you only speak one language, you’re gonna fall into this NLP stuff a lot easier…” [07:13]
The role of "peacocking" in pick-up artist subculture and in public persuasion.
Social media “bounties” for viral phrases and how engagement incentives shape the online discourse—a “squid games” logic reset for digital virality.
The generational divide: older generations are more susceptible to programmed language from legacy media.

Hypnosis, Reframing & Tribalism in Politics

[09:15–10:31]

Discussion of Scott Adams’ hypnotic language framework, Trump as a "master persuader," and the widespread use of “reframing.”
- “People join tribes and have their views assigned to them.” – Malice quoting Adams [10:07]
Religious (cult) mindset as an inoculation against outside programming, yet the power of language remains pervasive.
The difference between “surface tribalism” and deep, hardwired epistemological divides.

Transhumanism, Epstein Files & Hidden Agendas

[13:37–19:14; 41:53–44:26]

Transition to Metzger’s longstanding fixation with transhumanism, occult symbols, and elite interest in transcending (or abolishing) human nature.
- “The goal for these fucking scumbags is to turn us all into hermaphrodites…that are unconscious of being run like the animals we are.” – Metzger [15:37]
Malice clarifies the biblical Adam Kadmon myth and its symbolic significance for occult/transhumanist elites.
Explicit call-outs to Yuval Noah Harari and World Economic Forum rhetoric about modifying humanity.
Epstein files: Metzger argues the truly unsettling details (not just sexual crime, but “cannibalistic,” mind-control, or genetic experimentation content) are hidden in plain sight, with journalists and the public ignoring or dismissing the most damning evidence.
- “No one freezes jerky… No one redacts legitimate beef jerky emails. It's human meat.” – Metzger [69:17]

U.S. Foreign Policy, Hypocrisy, & Conspiracy

[16:17–19:47; 29:51–32:49; 43:02–44:13]

Iranian nuclear policy, North Korea, and American “continuity of government” as self-sustaining power systems.
“If Saddam had nukes, we wouldn’t have invaded.” – Malice [17:05]
Obama, Reagan, and even Bernie Sanders as "groomed" or manipulated figures within an entrenched system—presidents are “not in charge” of foreign policy.
- “Continuity of government, they call it." – Metzger [29:51]
The incestuous relationship between intelligence, blackmail, and elite networks—Dennis Hastert, Sirhan Sirhan, and the untouchable status of certain politicians.
Why left/right tribalism is a “veal cage” for thought—a false dichotomy.

Hollywood, Abuse, and the Elites

[34:32–39:11; 76:06–77:17]

Ongoing discussion of Pizzagate-like scandals, the psychological tactics used to cover up or normalize abuse, and how even the most egregious cases (Dennis Hastert, Lord Mountbatten, Rob Reiner) get memory-holed or reframed.
"All of the institutions... have failed. All of them." – Metzger [44:54]
Drug abuse in Hollywood as a trauma response, often rooted in family abuse rather than substance.
Malice calls out the normalization of abnormality in "elite" circles.

Mind Control, Autism & Systems Programming

[46:27–53:35]

Education, mental compartmentalization, and the rise of "engineered" social behaviors (from autism spectrum exploitation to “Love on the Spectrum” style media).
The “smart but focused” neurodivergent worker as ideal for modern technocratic systems—intense competence, sexual malleability, little resistance to authority.
Societal implications of intense medicalization/pharmaceutical regimens for both rich and poor children.
Malice and Metzger highlight the cognitive “plaque” of ideologically rigid brains, drawing back to Scott Adams’ tribe assignment framework.

Disinformation Tactics, Entrapment, and the Use of Terror

[62:46–67:39]

Programs of manufactured terrorism, entrapment, and the cyclical use of crisis for state power (Guy Fawkes, modern FBI plots, Stasi tactics).
“We create terrorists—the way they put together Spice Girls.” – Metzger [63:47]
Intelligence agencies imitate each other’s most effective control measures.

Media Control, Narrative Manufacture, and NLP

[23:13–24:21; 74:32–75:22]

Owning newspapers, media outlets as "planes of cause" for narrative engineering.
“If I was a dark occultist being, owning my own newspaper…” – Metzger [24:12]
Pushback against reductionist (and anti-Semitic) narratives: the problem is elite monopolization, not ordinary Jewishness.
The peculiarities of public mind control and mass self-hypnosis—especially since COVID.

Memorable Quotes & Moments

“That’s a conspiracy. No.” – Metzger [02:07], on the Challenger disaster
“Sci fi, there's all in sci fi is when will humans give up their love of war?” – Metzger [19:01]
“It’s almost like ‘plaque’ or something, where they're like, this just has to be this way.” – Metzger [09:01]
On Epstein Files:
- “You don't tell me its not people… It's human meat. Okay, so it could be adult meat. Okay, it's probably kid meat but don't. I just wanted to be nuanced about...” – Metzger [68:36]
"I can fart at will now and not have to worry." – Malice [13:17], humor during illness stories.
“If you only speak one language, you’re gonna fall into this NLP stuff a lot easier…” – Malice [07:13]
“Continuity of government, they call it.” – Metzger [29:51]
“All of the institutions that any—Oh, remember I told you about Lord Mountbatten? …How bad of a pederast you have to be that MI5 can’t clear your Wikipedia?” – Metzger [44:54]
“We create terrorists, like, that way.” – Metzger [63:47]

Notable Segment Timestamps

Challenger Disaster, Childhood Media, and Propaganda: [01:49–04:41]
Pick-up Artists & NLP: [05:13–07:09]
Tribes, Scott Adams, and Reframing: [09:15–10:31]
Transhumanism & Adam Kadmon: [13:37–15:47]
Elite Politics, Nukes, Foreign Policy: [16:17–19:47]
Institutional Hypocrisy (Hastert, etc.): [43:02–44:26]
Autism, Mind Control, and Societal Design: [46:27–53:06]
Entrapment, Terror, and Controlled Opposition: [62:46–67:39]
Media/Plane of Cause, Narrative Management: [23:13–24:21]
Epstein Files—Cannibalism Allegations, Blackmail, Bannon Interview: [68:36–73:27]

Tone, Language, & Format

The episode is caustically funny, deeply skeptical, and deliberately transgressive. Both Malice and Metzger stay in their characteristic tones—Malice as the anarchist, gleeful culture jammer; Metzger as the disaffected but perceptive comedy outsider, the “bilingual” interpreter of both media language and conspiracy subtext. Serious themes of trauma, corruption, and existential risk are delivered with punchlines, dark asides, or rapid-fire shifts in topic. Quotes are often sardonic and references are layered with inside jokes, especially about media and subculture phenomena.

Useful for Listeners Who Haven't Heard the Episode

If you missed the show, you’d come away understanding:

The ways both hosts believe society is manipulated—via language, schools, government, and media.
That conspiracies are real, but not always where you'd expect—or how they're usually sold in mainstream or alternative narratives.
Insights into the Epstein scandal, especially in connection to transhumanism, blackmail, and elite impunity.
How pop culture, science fiction, and even entertainment scandals tie back to deeper questions of power, programming, and mind control.
The essential irreverence and self-awareness with which Malice and Metzger tackle society’s “taboo” topics.
That society's left/right split is largely performative—most real power is beyond it.