Conquer Your Money Neuroses | Lewis Howes - 10% Happier with Dan Harris

Transcript

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This is the 10% Happier podcast. I'm Dan Harris. Hello my fellow suffering beings. How we doing today? We are coming back to one of my favorite subjects today. It's one of my favorites because it's a perennially thorny subject in my own life. How to conquer your money neuroses. How to rewire and upgrade your relationship to your wallet. My guest is a guy who has gone from being broke and living on his sister's couch to one of the most popular wellness podcasters on planet Earth. And those are not the only obstacles this guy has overcome. As a child, he dealt with a learning disability, bullying, and sexual abuse. Lewis Howes is the host of the School of Greatness podcast. He has written several best selling books and he's got a new book called Make Money Easy, Create financial Freedom, and Live a Richer Life. I like this because Lewis is not promising instant riches here. He's just talking about how to have an easier relationship to money and success, which is something I'm still working on myself after 53 years. In this conversation, we talk about overcoming setbacks. We have a little digression about the evolution of podcasting. We talk about how developing a personal mission can help you persist through challenges, which I've found to be really true in my own life. We talk about habits and mindset shifts that you can make to make money easier. Figuring out your personal money story, your history with money and how that can lead to a money strategy. How to continually evolve when it comes to your relationship to your money, and how to handle money and romantic relationships. Louis just got married. The art of clearing unnecessary shit off your plate so you can grow. And this is a little counterintuitive, but I love this. The value of generosity. Before we get started, I just want to let you know about something very cool that we're going to be doing in the second half of May. We are going to be doing a live meditation miniseries each weekday from Monday, May 19 to Friday, May 23 at 4 4pm Eastern. I will be leading a short guided meditation and then I'll be taking your questions. The whole miniseries is going to center around a set of practices that I often refer to as the Buddhist antidote to anxiety. And I'm not making this up. One of the key practices that I'll be teaching is loving kindness meditation, which the story goes was invented by the Buddha to help his monks who were dealing with a lot of fear. And loving kindness is part of a family of four related practices known as the Brahma Viharas or the divine abodes. I will admit when I first encountered these practices which are designed around cultivating loving kindness, compassion, something called sympathetic joy, and also equanimity. When I first ran into these practices, I was, as you might imagine, a little reflexively judgmental and dismissive. But I have really come to embrace these practices in a huge way over time, and they've had a massive impact on my life. And by the way, they've now been studied quite extensively in the labs and have been shown particularly loving kindness practice to have physiological, psychological and even behavioral benefits. Anyway, this is all happening over@danharris.com Like I said, Monday through Friday, the week of May 19th. Like any good drug dealer, the first dose will be free. So Monday's session will be open to everybody. And then for the rest of the week you have to be a paid subscriber. So head on over to danharris.com and check it out. We'll get started with my guy, Lewis Howes, right after this. It's that time of year. We're coming up on Mother's Day, and if you're looking for a great Mother's Day gift for your mom or for yourself, or for your spouse or for a mom, you know, I can confidently recommend many of the products from our good friends over at Cozy Earth. My wife, mother of our child, has been swanning around in her Cozy Earth pajamas, looking legit. And pajamas are just one of the many cozy products they offer. We've got sheets from them, I've got sweatpants from them, T shirts from them. Basically, anything you're doing where you need to chill, Cozy Earth has got your back and they've got your back. If you're looking for a Mother's Day gift as well, I can tell you Bianca looks good in her PJs. Even though they are sponsors of the show, she doesn't care. She's a discerning customer, so you should take that as a serious endorsement of Cozy Earth. To celebrate moms everywhere, use code dan Harris for 40% off your entire order. 40% off because she deserves the best. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. If you're in business, it really is. This may be a statement of the obvious, but it really is important to have a very good website. And I've learned this sometimes the hard way over recent years because I've made mistakes. Might shock you to hear that, but now I love my website and you can love yours too. Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and Succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or you're trying to scale your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. They have a ton of services. They'll do consultations for events and experiences. They'll showcase your offerings with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. Plus, they can help you streamline your workflow with built in appointment scheduling and email marketing tools. Everybody's talking about the importance of video today, and Squarespace can help you with that. They can help you upload and organize your videos, create stunning video libraries, even monetize your content by adding a paywall, which is perfect for online courses and exclusive tutorials and premium workshops and the like. So check out squarespace.com 10happier for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, you can use the offer code 10Happier to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Go Squarespace. Lewis Hows. Welcome back to the show.

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Conquer Your Money Neuroses" with Lewis Howes on 10% Happier with Dan Harris

Release Date: May 7, 2025

Introduction

In this compelling episode of 10% Happier with Dan Harris, host Dan Harris welcomes Lewis Howes, a renowned wellness podcaster and best-selling author, to discuss the intricate relationship people have with money. Drawing from his own tumultuous experiences—from overcoming financial hardship to navigating personal trauma—Howes provides actionable insights into transforming money-related anxieties into empowering financial strategies.

1. Overcoming Setbacks

The conversation begins with Howes reflecting on his journey from financial instability to success. He shares personal anecdotes about living on his sister's couch and battling learning disabilities, bullying, and sexual abuse during his childhood.

Notable Quote:
Howes (07:37): "I've always had a mission, and the mission is to serve 100 million lives every single week to help them improve the quality of their life."

This mission-driven approach helped Howes navigate periods of stagnation and discouragement, emphasizing the importance of having a larger purpose to sustain motivation during challenging times.

2. Evolution of Podcasting

Dan and Lewis delve into the evolution of podcasting, noting how early challenges such as limited accessibility and low public awareness were overcome with the rise of hits like Serial, which significantly boosted the medium's popularity.

Notable Quote:
Howes (07:14): "Podcasting was hard to get people to listen to back then... it was very hard. And people didn't have the awareness of what a podcast was, not until Serial came out."

This shift not only increased listenership but also made podcasting a viable platform for sharing meaningful content.

3. Developing a Personal Mission

A pivotal theme in the discussion is the role of a personal mission in overcoming adversity. Howes stresses that a clearly defined mission provides the resilience needed to push through setbacks.

Notable Quote:
Howes (07:37): "The mission is to serve 100 million lives every single week to help them improve the quality of their life."

This mission acts as a "North Star," guiding decisions and maintaining focus even when external circumstances become unfavorable.

4. Habits and Mindset Shifts to Make Money Easier

The duo explores various habits and mindset shifts that can streamline one's financial relationship. Howes introduces the concept of identifying and modifying ingrained financial behaviors to create a healthier relationship with money.

Notable Quote:
Howes (45:00): "There are three keys to improving your relationship with money: know your money story, reset your money mindset, and prepare for more money."

These steps form a foundational framework for listeners to reassess and enhance their financial well-being.

5. Figuring Out Your Personal Money Story

Understanding one's personal history with money is crucial. Howes emphasizes that recognizing and addressing past financial wounds can lead to more informed and strategic financial decisions.

Notable Quote:
Howes (41:57): "Most people don't reflect on their story. They don't write those wounds down just so they can see them and say, okay, here's some of my ghosts, here's some of my money wounds that maybe I thought don't affect me today, but they really do."

By dissecting these narratives, individuals can identify patterns that may be sabotaging their financial growth and take steps to heal and move forward.

6. Money and Romantic Relationships

Money often plays a significant role in romantic relationships, and Howes shares his strategies for managing financial conversations with his spouse. He underscores the importance of transparency and proactive communication to prevent money from becoming a source of conflict.

Notable Quote:
Howes (22:04): "We went to like a six-hour therapy session on Saturday once a month for the first year of our relationship and try to make it work."

This approach ensures that both partners are aligned in their financial goals and understand each other's money-related fears and aspirations.

7. Clearing Unnecessary Stuff to Grow

Minimalism isn't just a lifestyle choice but also a strategic move to clear financial clutter. Howes discusses how eliminating unnecessary expenses and obligations can free up resources and mental space, fostering financial growth and personal development.

Notable Quote:
Howes (77:52): "We hit a ceiling, right? And we're unable to mobilize to the next level as well, because we're doing it all ourselves. So it's learning to delegate."

By streamlining responsibilities and focusing on what truly matters, individuals can create a more conducive environment for financial prosperity.

8. The Value of Generosity

Generosity emerges as a powerful tool for enhancing one's financial mindset. Howes argues that being generous with time, energy, and resources not only benefits others but also enriches the giver's own financial life by fostering goodwill and opportunities.

Notable Quote:
Howes (57:00): "The more you are generous with your time, your curiosity, your presence, it pays dividends in return."

This reciprocal nature of generosity builds a supportive network that can be instrumental in achieving financial goals.

Conclusion

In wrapping up the episode, Howes reiterates that achieving a harmonious relationship with money is an ongoing journey requiring continuous self-reflection, mindset adjustments, and strategic planning. By addressing past wounds, fostering generosity, and maintaining a clear mission, individuals can transform their financial lives, leading to greater inner peace and external success.

Notable Quote:
Howes (85:44): "Money is one of the most emotionally charged things that hurts marriages and hurts relationships. If you can create a new relationship with money for yourself, you can create a better relationship with others."

This holistic approach not only alleviates money-related stress but also enhances overall life satisfaction.

Key Takeaways:

Identify Your Money Story: Understanding your past financial experiences is crucial for current financial health.
Reset Your Money Mindset: Shift from scarcity to abundance by adopting positive financial habits.
Prepare for More Money: Develop strategies and habits that facilitate financial growth.
Communicate Openly in Relationships: Transparent financial discussions can prevent future conflicts.
Embrace Generosity: Being generous can enhance your financial and personal life.
Continuous Learning and Adaptation: Financial strategies should evolve with your personal and professional growth.

Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their own relationships with money, identify areas for improvement, and implement the discussed habits to conquer their money neuroses effectively.