How to Co-Opt All the Stuff That Gets in the Way of Your Meditation | Christiane Wolf

Summary

Podcast Summary: How to Co-Opt All the Stuff That Gets in the Way of Your Meditation

10% Happier with Dan Harris | Guest: Christiane Wolf
Date: November 9, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this episode, host Dan Harris introduces meditation teacher Christiane Wolf, who leads a practical, guided meditation designed to help listeners transform the obstacles they encounter during meditation into integral parts of their practice. The core theme is the idea that “what’s in the way is the way”—that the distractions, restlessness, and discomfort we often wish would disappear during meditation can actually become our teachers.

This episode is particularly valuable for listeners who find their meditation practice frequently derailed by wandering minds or external noise, and offers both philosophical insight and hands-on guidance.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Reframing Obstacles as Opportunities

• Concept Introduction ([00:29])
  Dan Harris summarizes the main Zen-inspired theme:

  “What’s in the way is the way. The obstacle is the way. If you’ve ever sat to meditate and thought, I can’t focus, I’m totally distracted, I’m incredibly physically restless and it’s driving me nuts… this one’s for you.”
  He emphasizes Christiane’s guidance in using obstacles as the very material of meditation.

2. Guided Meditation: Working with What Gets in the Way

• Setting the Stage ([06:14])
  Christiane gently invites listeners to notice areas where they typically think, “If only this wasn’t here, then I could really meditate.”
  She explains that this practice is applicable to anything in life, not just meditation.

• Instructions & Reflection

  • Anchoring Awareness:
    Encourages choosing an anchor—breath, feet, or body sensations—that feels pleasant or neutral ([06:54]).

    “Find an anchor for this meditation... the breath is a good anchor if it feels pleasant or neutral to you. If not, then maybe the sensations in your feet.” — Christiane Wolf

  • Surfacing Expectations:
    Guides listeners to investigate their own assumptions about what makes a 'good' meditation ([07:29]).

    “What do you expect from a meditation? Or what is a good meditation for you?”

  • Turning Mindfulness on the ‘Problem’:
    Prompts curiosity and openness towards the very thing we wish would go away—restlessness, racing thoughts, boredom, or noise ([08:44]).

    “What if this wasn’t a problem, but just a part of this meditation today?”

  • Softening & Allowing:
    Invites the possibility that experiencing the obstacle is itself the path—what makes a meditation worthwhile is showing up for whatever arises ([09:38]).

    “As best as you can, allowing what you think is in the way to be here and actually be part of the way, allowing yourself to be restless, having racing thoughts, to be bored, or having the sounds around you—that is just how things are right now.”

  • Closing and Acknowledgment:
    Chorus of acceptance and self-compassion ([15:54]).

    “Giving yourself some credit for showing up today and doing the work... Thank you for meditating with me.” — Christiane Wolf

3. Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Dan Harris on meditation roadblocks ([00:29]):

  “If you’ve ever sat and bumped into a barrier like that, this one’s for you.”

• Christiane on expectations ([07:18]):

  “We often have the expectation that a good meditation should feel good in some way, ideally even blissful or at least somewhat calming and relaxing. Why would we even meditate if we wouldn’t expect this, right?”

• Christiane reframing frustration ([09:13]):

  “Can you explore it? If it is within you, where does that show up? Is that in your body or mainly in your head, or both? Does it have any particular qualities?”

• Concluding encouragement ([15:54]):

  “Giving yourself some credit for showing up today and doing the work... Thank you for meditating with me.”

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Important Timestamps

• [00:29] — Dan Harris introduces the core theme: “What’s in the way is the way.”
• [06:14] — Christiane Wolf begins the guided meditation, focusing on obstacles.
• [09:38] — Christiane reframes the obstacle as the heart of the meditation.
• [15:54] — Christiane ends the meditation with gratitude and self-appreciation.

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Tone & Language

The episode is supportive, non-judgmental, and practical, with both Dan and Christiane bringing a gentleness and light humor to the teachings. The use of everyday language makes the meditation accessible for beginners and relatable for seasoned practitioners alike.

“So, giving yourself some credit for showing up today and doing the work...” —Christiane Wolf ([15:54])

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Summary for New Listeners

If you struggle with the idea that distraction or discomfort ruins your meditation, this episode offers a refreshing and liberating perspective: obstacles can become the very ingredients that make your practice real and valuable. Through a step-by-step guided meditation and thoughtful inquiry, Christiane Wolf shows that the things we wish away may actually be showing us the way forward—on the cushion, and in life.

Transcript

[Christiana Wolf]

Foreign.

[Dan Harris]

This is the 10% Happier podcast. I'm Dan Harris. Happy Sunday, party people. Today we are bringing you a meditation from Christiana Wolf, and it's about one of those ideas that kind of sounds.

[Christiana Wolf]

Like a Zen riddle, but actually turns.

[Dan Harris]

Out to be incredibly useful. What's in the way is the way. The obstacle is the way. If you've ever sat to meditate and thought, I can't focus, I'm totally distracted, I'm incredibly physically restless and it's driving me nuts. If you've ever sat and bumped into a barrier like that, this one's for you. Christiane is going to show you how to turn these obstacles, these distractions, these powerful emotions into the practice itself. As you may know, Christiana is our teacher of the month [e-mail] that means she is very busy creating custom guided meditations for all of our Monday Wednesday episodes here on the podcast. For the most part, these guided meds are only available for paying subscribers, but we're dropping this one for free. The strategy pursued by drug dealers everywhere. Subscribers also get access to our weekly.

[Christiana Wolf]

Live meditation and Q and A sessions.

[Dan Harris]

The next one is coming up with Christiana Solo. We're doing this one on Wednesday at 4 Eastern.

[Christiana Wolf]

Wednesday, November 12th.

[Dan Harris]

We usually do these on Tuesdays, but Tuesday, November 11th, is a holiday in the U.S. it's Veterans Day, so we're moving our session to Wednesday quickly.

[Christiana Wolf]

If you want to meditate with me.

[Dan Harris]

In person, I've got two events coming up. I'm doing a live taping of this podcast on November 18th in New York City. My guest will be the comedian Pete Holmes. It is a benefit for the New York Insight Meditation Center. Then coming up on November 23rd, I'll be doing an intimate Sunday afternoon meditation and Q and a sesh at a lovely hotel in the Hudson Valley in New York called Troutbeck. If you want a nice day trip from the city, come and say hi. I've put links to both events in the show notes if you want to get tickets. Okay, after a quick break, a guided meditation from Christiana Wolf.

[Christiana Wolf]

So we just had a big team summit here at 10% happier. All of the employees got together in northern Westchester, which is the county to the north of New York City. That's where I live and work. And so the team all got together in my neck of the woods and we got some homes on Airbnb where everybody stayed together. I actually stayed at my house, but the team members all stayed together in these two homes. We were a little worried about it at first, what was it going to be like to have all of these colleagues who don't know each other that well staying together in these large houses? It turned out to be great. We were able to get houses where everybody could have their own bathroom, and it just led to a ton of bonding. People stayed up late together, watched movies, caught up, got to know each other. It just led to an increased level of bonding. And that's one of the reasons why I love Airbnb, not only when I'm arranging housing for my team on a retreat, but also when I am arranging vacations with me and my family. And here's the cool thing. I love staying in welcoming homes that I book on Airbnb. But it's got me thinking that my home could do the same for somebody else. My wife and I have put so much love into all the details of our home. Why not help somebody feel comfortable and taken care of while they're traveling? When we're away from home? Think about it. If you host your home on Airbnb while you're traveling, it's a great way to offset some of the costs of your trip. The extra income that you make can be put towards an upcoming trip, a splurge. You've been eyeing home improvements. And if you've got a lot of trips ahead of you, hosting is a pretty cool and unique way to make some money back. Whenever I travel, my place is just empty. So while I'm away, it really does make sense to host it on Airbnb. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how [e-mail] host.

[Dan Harris]

This show.

[Christiana Wolf]

Is sponsored by BetterHelp. Shorter days do not have to be so dismal. It's time to reach out and check in with those you care about and to remind ourselves that we're not alone. As seasons change and the days grow shorter, it can be a really tough time for many of us. This November better help encouraging everybody to reach out, check in on friends, reconnect with loved ones, and remind the people in your life that you're there. Just as it can take a little courage to send that message or grab coffee with somebody you haven't seen in a while. Reaching out for therapy can feel difficult, too, but it's worth it. And it almost always leaves people wondering, why did I not do that sooner? I'm really in the habit of when somebody pops in my head who I haven't talked to in a minute, just sending them a text. Actually, literally as I'm saying this, I'M remembering I haven't talked to my buddy Michael in a second, so I'm going to text him as soon as I shut up and end this. Advertisement It's a great practice. It is, like many of my best ideas, something I stole from my friend Joseph Goldstein, the great meditation teacher who talks about the fact that if you have a thought to be generous in any way, just do it before the second doubts kick in. And texting or reaching out to somebody you've been thinking about, even if it feels a little weird, is a great.

[Dan Harris]

Example of this practice.

[Christiana Wolf]

And the same is true with your therapist. Granted, it's a little different than an old friend, but I love talking to my therapist and working through my problems, asking him whether he thinks I'm crazy. Sometimes I am. It's really, really helpful, especially at the time of year when things can get a little gloomy. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session based on over 1.7 million client reviews this month. Don't wait to reach out. Whether you're checking in on a friend or reaching out to a therapist yourself, BetterHelp makes it easier to take that first step. Our listeners get 10% off their their first [e-mail] happier. That's betterhelp.com happier.

So in this meditation we will explore how to work with something in your life where you find yourself saying something like if only this wasn't here, then, for example, then I could really meditate. We will use the example of meditation what we believe gets in the way of us meditating, but of course the principle is applicable for anything that we feel gets in the way of filling your own blanks. So make yourself comfortable for this meditation. If you're seated, placing your feet firmly on the ground and sitting with your back pretty upright if you like, close your eyes or simply lower your gaze. Start by feeling into the areas where your body has contact with the ground or your chair. Simply feeling into those areas where your body has contact and sensing is it hard or soft, warm or cold? Find an anchor for this meditation too, which you will return to again and again whenever you get lost in thinking. The breath is a good anchor if it feels pleasant or neutral to you. If not, then maybe staying with the sensations in your feet could be a good alternative. If you're using the breath, then now just allow the breath to become A little bit longer and deeper, becoming aware of the body, just sitting here and breathing deeply, giving yourself a little bit of time to arrive and settle into this meditation. Now, asking yourself, what do you expect from a meditation? Or what is a good meditation for you? Maybe you've heard the phrase a good meditation is one you do. But having heard this doesn't necessarily mean that your mind gives up its expectations that a good meditation should be or feel a particular way. We often have the expectation that a good meditation should feel good in some way, ideally even blissful, or at least somewhat calming and relaxing. Why would we even meditate if we wouldn't expect this? Right? So be curious and find out what it is for you. What makes you feel disappointed in the meditation or maybe even in yourself if that doesn't happen? Mindfulness has the wonderful qualities of curiosity and openness. We can turn mindfulness like a flashlight onto anything, including something that we don't fully understand. So you can now shine mindfulness onto what you're struggling with in meditation. What would you like to have gone where you find yourself thinking, if only this wouldn't be here, then I could meditate. What is it? Is it restlessness? Racing thoughts? Boredom? The noise around you make this now the focus of your attention. Getting really curious about it. Can you explore it? If it is within you, where does that show up? Is that in your body or mainly in your head, or both? Does it have any particular qualities? Is it solid or is there some movement to it? Is it still the same or has it changed? Or can you imagine bringing the breath into what is challenging? Breathing some space into or around whatever you're working with right now? What are you noticing? What if this wasn't a problem, but just a part of this meditation today? What if what you're doing right now is exactly what makes a good meditation? As best as you can, allowing what you think is in the way to be here and actually be part of the way, allowing yourself to be restless, having racing thoughts to be bored, or having the sounds around you, that is just how things are right now. So giving yourself some credit for showing up today and doing the work and when you're ready, bringing this meditation to an end, inviting some movement back into the body and open your eyes when you're ready. Thank you for meditating with me.

[Dan Harris]

Thanks again to Christiana. Don't forget I'll be doing a live taping of this podcast, which will also double as a fundraiser for the New York Insight Meditation center that's coming up on November 18th in New York City. There's a link in the show notes if you want to get tickets. Also, as always, a reminder to sign [e-mail] you'll get guided meditations that come along with all of our Monday Wednesday episodes, plus weekly live meditation and Q A sessions. Our next session is on Wednesday, November 12th. We're skipping Tuesday, which is when we usually do meditations. Because it's Veterans Day in the United States, we do these always at 4 Eastern. So Wednesday, November 12th at 4 Eastern with Christiana Wolf, who's our Teacher of the month. And then we'll be back to our regular Tuesday at 4pm Eastern Time schedule. Finally, thanks so much to everybody who worked so hard to make this show. Our producers are Tara Anderson and Elanor Vasily. Our recording and engineering is handled by the great folks over at Pod People. Lauren Smith is our managing producer, Marissa Schneiderman is our senior producer, DJ Kashmir is our executive producer and Nick Thorburn of the band Islands wrote our theme.

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