Podcast Summary: 10% Happier with Dan Harris

Episode: Reset Your Nervous System: Actionable Advice for Stress, Burnout, and Trauma | Linda Thai

Date: September 3, 2025
Guest: Linda Thai (Therapist, Educator, MSW with emphasis on neurobiology of attachment and trauma)

Overview

This episode kicks off the “Reset” series, focusing on actionable tools to help listeners reset their nervous systems in the face of modern-day stress, burnout, and trauma. Dan Harris and Linda Thai unpack the science and lived experience of nervous system dysregulation, clarify the differences between stress, burnout, and trauma, and offer practical, body-based tools for resilience and recovery. Linda’s deep expertise in trauma modalities and her own healing journey make this episode both insightful and deeply compassionate.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Understanding the Nervous System

[06:04–15:18]

• The nervous system has two main branches:
  • Sympathetic ("fight or flight"): Mobilizes to take action — at its positive, energizes us for play, work, engagement; at its extreme, it drives panic, anxiety, and defensive responses.
  • Parasympathetic ("rest and digest"): Promotes stillness, recovery, and social engagement; at its positive, allows rest and connection; at its lowest, leads to shutdown or “flaccid immobility” (think possum playing dead).
  • Ventral vagal: Branch of the parasympathetic that supports connection, safety, curiosity, and compassion.
  • Freeze response: Where both branches are activated ("wired and tired"), leading to immobilization with high internal activation.
• Reframing reactions: “Think of it as the nervous system responding in appropriateness to what is happening in our environment.” — Linda [14:03]

Definitions: Stress, Trauma, and Burnout

[17:27–29:12]

• Stress: Normal, not all bad; can build resilience if it's "challenge by choice" and you have resources/support.
• Distress: When stress is prolonged, with insufficient resources or support.
• Traumatic stress: "Too much or too little of something for too long or not for long enough" without the ability for the nervous system to return to homeostasis.
• Burnout: When prolonged stress and distress lead to the collapse of coping mechanisms, often within institutional or systemic settings (e.g., healthcare), sometimes better framed as "institutional exploitation."
• The path from stress to trauma can turn strengths into weaknesses, damaging relationships — which, ironically, are the path to healing.

“All strengths taken too far become a weakness.” — Linda Thai [19:00]

How to Tell if You're Stressed, Burned Out, or Traumatized

[33:32–39:26]

• Physical cues: Sleep patterns, digestion ("How’s your pooping?"), appetite, heart rate variability.
• Relational cues: Feedback from people in your circle about your irritability, withdrawal, or behaviors.
• Physiological metrics: Tracking trends with wearables is helpful, but pay attention to broader patterns and context instead of obsessing over daily numbers.
• Denial and override: People may ignore relationship needs, sleep problems, or hydration until forced into collapse or retreat.

Practical Tools for Everyday Resilience

[39:26–70:52]

1. Let Your Struggles Be Known in Real Time

• Instead of isolating or bottling up, share with people how you’re actually doing. This doesn't mean huge disclosures; daily micro-honesty can help (“basic interpersonal hygiene”).
• For those with trauma, reaching out can feel “terrible and wonderful and terrible.” Start small, even with pets, plants, or gradual group exposure.
• “Being seen and being heard and being known is a function of groups and communities.” — Linda [44:03]

2. Start Your Day Anchored

• Instead of jumping out of bed, pause. Feel the support of the bed beneath you, notice your peripheral vision, and breathe with awareness.
• The aim is to counteract constant “go mode” and foster a sense of being held and supported in the body.
• “One way to counteract that is right when you wake up… to lie there for a minute. To feel supported.” — Dan Harris [49:58]

3. Look to the Horizon / Re-orient Vision

• Throughout the day, especially when stressed, pause to literally look at the horizon or the far distance.
• This helps reconnect peripheral vision, releases tension, and shifts from hyper-focus/tunnel vision into a more engaged, creative state.
• Slowly turn your head when scanning, which gently stimulates the phrenic nerve (diaphragm), often evoking a natural breath.
• “It’s impossible to be in doing mode when we have access to peripheral vision and the horizon.” — Linda [50:47]

4. Experiment with Deep Breathing

• Practices like the 4-7-8 breath (inhale 4, hold 7, exhale 8, repeat 4–6x) can help, but not for everyone.
• For some, forced deep breaths may increase anxiety. Pay attention to what your body actually feels safe doing (“there’s research, and then there’s me-search.”).

5. Complete the Stress Response Cycle (3 min, Full Body Movement)

• After moments of stress, intentionally perform 3 minutes of vigorous, full-body exercise (pushups, jumping jacks, burpees) to metabolize stress hormones.
• For those in “freeze,” this helps discharge pent-up energy.

6. Squeeze Inwards and Press Outwards

• Make yourself very small (hugging inward, scrunching up), then push out powerfully (as if against imaginary walls or ceiling).
• Engages the protective “fight” urge safely, brings ventral vagal/social engagement online, and helps complete the defensive response cycle.

7. Growl, Scream into a Pillow, or Use Primal Release

• Channel the primal urge to scream, growl, or express “fight” energy (e.g., yelling into a pillow, growling playfully with a partner).

8. Remember to Remember

• Remind yourself: “This isn’t life or death. Even though it feels like life or death.” Reconnect with your resources—nature, ancestors, community, larger purpose.
• Swaying, dance, movement and ritual are ancient protective factors against aloneness and depression; try to reintroduce them into daily life.

“Your nervous system is actually responding in an appropriate way to the environment… There’s nothing wrong with you that you're feeling stress or distress.” — Linda [73:20]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I spent probably the first 35 years of my life trying to find the magic hack of how to not ever ask anyone for help ever… life took me on a series of merry adventures.” — Linda [40:11]
• “We have been stripped of so much culturally: dance, movement, Tai Chi, gardening, walking, forest bathing… all of these are protective factors against aloneness.” — Linda [71:20]
• “For many of us, as soon as we have a need, we go into fight or flight about it… I have a need. No I don’t. I have a need. No I don’t.” — Linda [42:28]
• “It's not our fault. But it is our responsibility in some ways and there are things we can do to manage it.” — Dan Harris [74:13]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [06:04] What is the nervous system? Sympathetic vs parasympathetic explained
• [14:03] Moving from “good/bad” thinking to appropriate responses
• [17:27] How stress, distress, trauma, and burnout interrelate
• [22:35] Social and relational impacts of prolonged stress
• [25:43] Burnout as “institutional exploitation,” not just personal failure
• [29:22] Stress effects on digestion (constipation/diarrhea as nervous system signals)
• [33:32] Self-diagnosing stress, burnout, trauma—physical, relational and wearable tech cues
• [39:26] Everyday resilience tools begin: letting struggles be known in real time
• [46:51] Morning routine to anchor and set up the nervous system
• [54:30] Looking to the horizon to reset nervous system during stress
• [59:46] Dr. Andrew Weil's 4-7-8 breathing; finding the right tool for your system
• [61:16] Completing the stress response cycle with full body movement
• [64:28] Squeeze inwards/press outwards—a tool for breaking freeze
• [69:11] Remember to remember—ritual, connection, and context

Resources Mentioned

• Linda Thai’s website and courses: linda-tai.com
• Guided meditation and live Q&A: Available to subscribers at danharris.com
• Further reading/interview: Barbara Fredrickson on micro-interactions (link in podcast show notes)
• Books & podcasts: Peter Attia’s “Outlive”, "The Drive" podcast

Final Thoughts

This wide-ranging episode is highly actionable and validating for anyone struggling with stress, burnout, or trauma. Linda Thai’s practical, body-based strategies and compassionate reframing will be useful whether you’re seeking immediate relief, a better understanding of your patterns, or ways to help others in your life.

“When you find your people, life gets easier. And there are all manner of ways to be with people. And it might not be the depth of intimacy that you’re longing for or perhaps scared of. And yet we begin.” — Linda Thai [45:52]