500 SANTAS FROM MEXICO and SOME ENCHANTED CARHOP JEFF REGAN, P.I.

Summary

1001 Radio Crime Solvers – Episode Summary

Episode Title

500 Santas from Mexico and Some Enchanted Carhop
Show: Jeff Regan, P.I.
Host: Jon Hagadorn
Date: December 10, 2025

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Episode Overview

This holiday-themed episode features two classic detective stories starring Jeff Regan, “the Lion’s Eye”:

1. 500 Santas from Mexico
2. Some Enchanted Carhop

Both mysteries are set in the golden age of radio and brim with hard-boiled banter, Christmas atmospheres, and twisty detective intrigue. In the first, Regan investigates a murder tied to a batch of imported Santa Claus figurines with a deadly secret. In the second, a mystery unfolds around a carhop receiving anonymous gifts, an overprotective guardian, and a web of deception just before Christmas.

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Story 1: 500 Santas from Mexico

Main Plot

Regan is hired by seductive taxi dancer Lorna Lee Lovely, who claims she needs to find her missing husband, Judd Brown, to claim insurance money before Christmas. Soon, Regan discovers the case has less to do with true love and more with pearls, murder, and Mexican Santa Claus figurines.

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Key Discussion Points & Plot Events

1. The Case Begins – Lorna’s Christmas Request

• Regan is recruited by his boss, The Lion, to help Lorna Lee Lovely at the Rose Ballroom.
• Lorna claims her husband, Judd Brown, is missing and possibly dead. She wants proof for an insurance claim.
• Lion: “An opportunity to help out a poor girl in distress. Jeffrey, get her the insurance money before the holiday.” (02:01)

2. Lorna’s True Colors

• Regan learns that Lorna’s real name is Lorna Brown, and Judd was a part-time Santa at a department store.
• Lorna offers extra money if Regan indeed finds Judd "dead".
  Lorna: “There’s a hundred more in it if you find him. Dead.” (03:53)

3. Meeting Judd Brown – The Truth Unravels

• Regan is tailed by someone and after a confrontation, the pursuer reveals himself as Judd Brown.
• Judd is not Lorna’s husband, barely knows her, and works as a department store Santa to support his studies as a chiropodist.
• Judd claims someone – possibly Lorna and an accomplice (“Felipe”) – is trying to kill him. Judd: “I never saw her till this week... I think they meant to kill me.” (06:47–07:23)

4. A Connection with Mexican Santa Figurines

• At Jensen’s Department Store, Regan learns about small pottery Santa Claus figurines imported from Mexico, one of which was broken. It was given to Judd.
• Lorna and Felipe are searching for this specific broken Santa.
• Store Employee: “The Santa Clauses are imported by the La Paz Importing Company... She said she was a representative.” (12:11)

5. Murder and Motive

• Newspapers report Judd Brown found murdered with the broken Santa nearby. Regan deduces there’s more to the figurine.

6. Smuggling Scheme

• The Lion theorizes smuggling (possibly narcotics); Regan suspects something more valuable. The Lion: "Marijuana, Jeffrey, in the Santa Claus?" (14:52–14:56)
• Regan finds the figurine stuffed with pearls worth $60,000, smuggled from La Paz.

7. Climactic Showdown

• Lorna and her partner try to force Regan to hand over the Santa/pearls. The true killer is revealed as Thorne, the Sunrise Motel owner, not “Felipe” as believed.
• After a struggle, Regan subdues Thorne and turns Lorna and the pearls over to the police.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Regan, on Lorna: “Like my boss, the lion, said it got you into the Christmas spirit early... but what it got Judd Brown into was the morgue.” (00:44)
• Regan’s hard-boiled witticism: “Lorna Lee Lovely was what you wanted to wake up and find under your Christmas tree all right. Only not too close to the branches. It’d be a fire hazard.” (02:19)
• The Lion’s classic fat-wittedness: “Wind tunnel with a cigar in the middle.” (02:34, 24:19)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• Meeting Lorna at the Rose Ballroom: (02:37–05:46)
• Judd Brown confrontation in alley: (05:45–07:23)
• Department store Santa origin mystery: (11:37–13:09)
• Discovery of Judd’s murder: (13:18–13:45)
• Santa Claus smuggling theory: (14:44–14:56)
• Final showdown with Lorna and Thorne: (21:32–23:35)
• Case wrap-up with The Lion: (23:35–24:41)

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Story 2: Some Enchanted Carhop

Main Plot

Regan is hired by prosperous Ward Hamilton to find out who’s been sending anonymous gifts to Mary Winter, a carhop with a rocky relationship to men. The case winds through eccentric suitors, a fake psychologist, and Hamilton’s own sinister motives.

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Key Discussion Points & Plot Events

1. A Christmas Client with an Agenda

• Hamilton says Mary is “strange” and needs help. She’s receiving daily anonymous presents.
• Hamilton’s true concern is financial—he’s tired of paying for a counselor to “fix” Mary’s disinterest in men.
• Hamilton: “The more delay in cure, the more it costs. Frankly, Mr. Regan, I'm tired of the obligation.” (31:23)

2. The Watchers and the Threats

• Mary is skittish and scared; a nervous man (Smith) and a heavyset man with a gun lurk near her apartment.
• Regan: “It looked like it was gonna be a real holiday season. Brotherly love all over the place.” (36:28)

3. The Human Relations Counselor

• Regan visits Mr. Farthing (real name, Howard Farnham), a “human relations” quack involved in extortion schemes.
• Farthing pleads ethics but gives himself away with his shifty behavior.

4. The Gifter Revealed

• Ernest Smith, the trench-coated introvert, is the anonymous benefactor. He likes Mary from afar, having seen her in Farthing’s waiting room.
• Smith: “I’ve never met Mary Winter. Is that abnormal, Mr. Regan? Oh, dear, dear. Perhaps I’m sicker than Mr. Farthing told me.” (42:17)

5. Hamilton’s Game

• Hamilton, far from being protectively paternal, wants to keep Mary isolated and under his control, using Farthing to manipulate her and sideline rivals.
• He turns violent when exposed.

6. Showdown and Christmas Resolution

• Regan exposes Hamilton’s scheme to both Mary and the police, after subduing him during a confrontation.
• Smith and Mary connect in the end—Regan spies them at the drive-in, ordering together.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Regan, about Hamilton: "You convinced the girl she couldn't trust any man in the world. But you should have been the other way around. You're the one she couldn't trust." (49:54–50:11)
• Mary Winter’s dry final line: “She said, with or without onions? Merry Christmas, Lion.” (53:35–53:40)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• Lion’s Christmas spirit & client briefing: (26:40–28:38)
• Ward Hamilton's description of Mary & motives: (29:17–31:44)
• Smith revealed as the secret admirer: (40:42–43:01)
• The final confrontation with Hamilton & Farthing: (48:18–51:41)
• Christmas denouement & Lion's carol: (52:21–54:05)

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Tone & Style

• Classic hard-boiled: Snappy dialogue, dry sarcasm, and world-weariness abound.
• Humor: Deadpan one-liners and jabs between Regan and the Lion.
• Seasonal setting: Christmas, holiday melancholy, and festive backdrops contrast with the criminal underworld.

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Summary Takeaway

This double-feature blends holiday cheer with classic noir. “500 Santas from Mexico” spins a twisty tale of smuggling pearls in Christmas figurines and ruthless pursuit. “Some Enchanted Carhop” uses loners, psychos, and manipulative guardians to comment on loneliness and connection, all wrapped in sardonic festive wrapping. Both demonstrate Jeff Regan’s skill as a detective—quick on the draw, but quicker with wit.

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Standout Quotes

• “There were 12 Santa Clauses that had pearls in that ship... worth $60,000 bucks. The broken Santa Clauses had the pearls. They weren’t ever supposed to get into the store. But one got away and Jud Brown got it.” – Lorna Lee Lovely (18:59–19:11)
• “It started when a guy named Ward Hamilton hired the lion and me to find out who was sending packages to a carhop named Mary Winter. I met a little guy with an umbrella and a big guy with a gun and a human relations counselor who called himself Mr. Farthing.” – Jeff Regan (40:06)
• “You like big dill?” – Lorna Lee Lovely (18:29)
• “She said, with or without onions? Merry Christmas, Lion.” – Jeff Regan (53:40)

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For Listeners Who Missed It

This episode is a festive plunge into the world of dangerous dames, criminal Santas, and lonely hearts, all resolved (as always) by Jeff Regan’s classic detective grit—with a side of holiday irony.

Transcript

[Jeff Regan]

My name's regan. I work for anthony j. Lyon, international detective bureau. They call me the lion's eye.

[Narrator]

Wednesday at 9 and CBS brings you Jeff Regan, investigator. Starring Frank Graham as Regan. With Frank Nelson as Anthony J. Lyon. So stand by for mystery and suspense and adventure in tonight's story of the 500 Santa Clauses from Mexico.

[Jeff Regan]

Like my boss, the lion said it got you into the Christmas spirit early. All those Santa Clauses. But what it got Judd Brown into was the morgue. Judd Brown was the 6 foot tall, part time Santa Claus from Jensen's Department Store. What got him into the morgue was one of those 6 inch tall Santa Clauses from Mexico.

Well, the thing teed off for me. When I walked into the Lion's office, he was looking at somebody's picture. From the way he was leering, I could tell it wasn't Gorgeous George.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, hello, Jeffrey. You're just in time to meet our new client. Lorna Lee Lovely. Yes, here in this picture.

[Jeff Regan]

Lorna Lee Lovely. See what you mean.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes. She gave me to understand that wasn't her real name. Professional name. Of course. She's a dancer.

[Jeff Regan]

I figured.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

So naturally she needs a professional name. Something suitable. And I must say her name is suitable. Jeffrey. Lovely, lovely liquid eyes, rosy cheeks. Beautiful. That reminds me, Jeffrey. She works at the Rose Ballroom. She's a taxi dancer. She wants you to get right over there. Something about finding her husband.

[Jeff Regan]

With those looks, she can't find her husband.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes, that's what I thought too. But you see, it. Well, it happens that he's dead.

[Jeff Regan]

He lets that stop him.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, she thinks he's dead anyhow. It's something about collecting the insurance. Proof of death, that sort of thing.

[Jeff Regan]

I got it.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

An opportunity to help out a poor girl in distress. Jeffrey, get her the insurance money before the holiday. Christmas is less than four weeks away, you know.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay, fatso, you check the insurance companies and give me that photo. Maybe Christmas is going to come early this year.

Lorna. Ly lovely was what you wanted to wake up and find under your Christmas tree all right. Only not too close to the branches. It'd be a fire hazard.

I drove across town, parked a couple of blocks away from the Rose Ballroom, walked back and went in.

I shoved through a covey of seagulls waiting around to get themselves danced with. That was when a wave of taboo came busting through Rumber. Mister, you want to Lee Lovely.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

That's right.

[Jeff Regan]

Tickets go on my expense account.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Then you're Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

You picked it.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Rumba.

[Jeff Regan]

Regan, you hired me.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

You don't look like the kind Regan kind.

[Jeff Regan]

Taramba.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

So good. Dream boy.

[Jeff Regan]

Well, how do they look?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

The kind you know.

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

So? With you, I get it both ways.

[Jeff Regan]

Dream boy. Boy, you done all right.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Thanks. Maybe I get a night off sometime.

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

You talk brief. I like that.

[Jeff Regan]

You gave the lion a retainer.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

That wind tunnel with a cigar in.

[Jeff Regan]

The middle, that's a lion.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

He said he'd send you over.

[Jeff Regan]

He did?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yeah, he did.

[Jeff Regan]

What do I do, lady?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

For the 50 bucks, I'm looking for a husband.

[Jeff Regan]

The 50 bucks?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

There's a hundred more in it if you find him. Dead.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Dead, dead.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Dance, Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

I used my ticket.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

On the house.

[Jeff Regan]

No, thanks.

I'll see you around.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Oh, wait a minute, Regan. I'm not hiring a gun. He's dead already.

[Jeff Regan]

Then we can talk.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Over here. Manager's office.

[Jeff Regan]

Won't he object?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

He's not here. He hates the joy.

[Jeff Regan]

This way.

[Ward Hamilton]

Better.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Now we can have privacy.

[Jeff Regan]

That's what I thought. How do you know your husband's dead?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

He's married to me, Regan, and he hasn't been home for seven weeks. He's dead.

[Jeff Regan]

I see what you mean.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Andy was insured for 10,000 bucks.

[Jeff Regan]

So I prove he's dead, you collect the insurance.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

They don't all dance like you, Regan. 10,000 clams, I kiss off the Rose Ballroom for the rest of my life.

[Jeff Regan]

Your husband's name?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Judd Brown.

[Jeff Regan]

Brown.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

My real name's Lorna brown.

[Jeff Regan]

Description?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

He's 6ft tall, dark hair, scar on the right hand. He got fishing. Got a hook in his hand. He's nuts about sports. Baseball, football.

[Jeff Regan]

If I find a corpse in the stand at the Rose bowl game, I'll let you know. What else?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Nothing that'll help. Oh, yes, one thing. At Christmas, he sometimes works as a dispute. Department store Santa Claus. That's nice work when you can get it.

[Jeff Regan]

Where does he get it?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Around where they want him.

[Jeff Regan]

I'll check.

One question, Mrs. Brown.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yeah?

[Jeff Regan]

What if I turn your husband up alive?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Tail him, Regan. Find out where he lives and what he does. And phone me anytime, day or night. Live at the Sunrise Motel, Glendale Boulevard. Don't lose him, Reagan.

[Jeff Regan]

From the way the green ice lit up in her eyes when she said that it figured her husband wasn't so dead. It also figured he wouldn't be easy to find. I turned her back over to the Diamond Struggle crowd and headed for my car. There was an alley let down behind some Chinese chop suey joints. It was a shortcut. My mistake was I turned into it because a guy turned right after me. I ducked around a corner and waited. Pretty soon his steps came up. Then a shadow. And that was when I grabbed him. What do you think of Taylor?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Let go. Me. Let go.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Me.

[Jeff Regan]

Can I get some answers?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

No, no, no.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Don't kill me. Let go.

[Jeff Regan]

Who's gonna kill you?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, shit.

[Jeff Regan]

Are you just a kid?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

I wasn't doing anything.

[Jeff Regan]

You were tailing me.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, yes.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes, I was.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Why?

[Ward Hamilton]

Well, I.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Why?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Because I saw you with that girl.

[Jeff Regan]

Girl?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

The taxi dancer in the Rose Ballroom. I watched you through the glass doors. I didn't dare go in. Wait a minute.

[Jeff Regan]

Let me see your right hand.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Why?

[Jeff Regan]

Let me see it. What do you want with me? Fishhook's car.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

What?

[Jeff Regan]

Six feet tall, dark hair. You're Judd Brown.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes. What have I done?

[Jeff Regan]

Well, your wife says you're dead.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Why?

[Jeff Regan]

Lorna Lee Brown, alias Lorna Lee Lovely.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

I'm not married to her. I never saw her till this week.

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah, and you hate sports.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Sport? I haven't time for them. I'm studying to be a chiropodist. Sure, at Joshua Addison College of Pedal Care and Cure in Eagle Rock. I haven't time for anything but people's feet. And right now, being Santa Claus.

[Jeff Regan]

Give me that again, Bing.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Santa Claus. The department store. Santa Claus at Jensen's downtown store.

[Jeff Regan]

That checks anyway.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Checks? Look, I don't understand this. You aren't one of them, are you?

[Jeff Regan]

I'm Regan. International detective girl.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

A detective? Oh, then maybe you can help me. I think they meant to kill me.

[Jeff Regan]

They?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes.

[Jeff Regan]

You better give it to me from the top.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Well, last Friday, I went to work at Jensen's weekends.

[Jeff Regan]

As Santa Claus.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

I needed the extra money.

[Jeff Regan]

Go on.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

I worked Friday and Saturday. And then Sunday I studied at the college library on the tibio tarsal articulation.

[Jeff Regan]

And legitigrade animals get to Monday.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Well, Monday, that was the first time I saw her following me.

[Jeff Regan]

Lonely. Lovely.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes. And that same night, when I was leaving the Metatarsal foundation somebody grabbed me in the dark. Who? I don't know. But I fought and I got loose. At first I thought it was. Might just be a whole lot.

[Jeff Regan]

Something changed your mind?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes. Tuesday, somebody tried to break into my room at the boarding house.

[Jeff Regan]

So. So I moved out Wednesday and hid out.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes, Mr. Regan, I. I moved into the New Canton Hotel and I didn't come out till tonight.

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah, but you knew exactly where to find Lorna Lee Lovely.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Well, yes, I. I saw her picture in the Rose Ballroom advert advertisement in the Examiner. I thought that if I hung around and she didn't see me. I. I might find out why she was following.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Mr. Regan, behind you.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Look out.

[Jeff Regan]

I turned too late and got one alongside of the head. I thought I was seeing light from the naked bulb at the end of the alley. But the light began to spread like an orange bruise.

Then a fist the size of a pillow drifted up. I couldn't see anything else. I rested my chin on the pillow. I shouldn't have done that.

When I opened my eyes, I was looking up at some writing on a plaster wall. It was upside down. When I got to my feet, the writing still looked upside down. That was because it was Chinese. I was in the same alley behind the chop suey joint. Only Jud Brown wasn't around anymore. Neither was the guy who sapped me. I knew what answer I'd get when I went back to Rose Ballroom. Lorna Lee Lovely wasn't around either. She'd had a sick headache half an hour ago. Sure she had. I decided to waste a nickel on a phone call to the Sunrise Motel where she said she'd lived. That was when I got surprised. She wasn't in, but she did live there. That made it worth the drive out.

Have you missed her? You work here, then? Her speaking of, do my place. I own it. I'm looking for Lorna Lee Lovely. Left over that way. Gone? I mean, yeah.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

How long?

[Jeff Regan]

Well, you ain't lucky. Maybe three minutes. Checked out. Left no address. Left no address. She alone? You ask questions, mister? I like cancers, maybe. You're a cop? Private style.

Yeah.

Here's my identity, huh? Never seen a private detective except in the movies. Well, what can I do you for? Let's have a look where Lorne Lee Lovely live. Oh, that cottage over there. This way.

Mind the grass here. Don't grow good out here in California. No rain? Never no rain. Just small. Get you in your eyes. All that smog. Commissioners. Yeah. Yeah. Anybody ever come over to see a Thorne? Oh, one guy. Walrus. Walrus? Me and the old lady called him big guy, black eyes, walrus mustache, dark skin. Maybe a Mexican. You know his right name?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Felipe.

[Jeff Regan]

She called him Felipe, huh? Yeah. Here's where she lived.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Hmm.

[Jeff Regan]

Kind of left in a hurry, didn't she? Oh, the old lady ain't gonna like it. This is a mess. All these paper cartons are on. Oh, them. Them's what? Them Santa Clauses come packed in Santa Clauses, Christmas sidelines. She sold them to department stores. Walrus would bring them. The guy she called Flippy.

Here's one of them right here down in these pavers.

A busted Santa Claus. Somehow when I say it, I don't like the way it sounds.

All of a sudden I was awful anxious to visit Toyland at Jensen's Department store. I did. It was Friday night, so they were open. The Judd Brown part time Santa Claus hadn't showed up. But there was some other Santa Clauses there that sent me looking for a white carnation. Hey.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes, sir.

[Jeff Regan]

You the floor walker?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes, sir. May I assist you, sir?

[Jeff Regan]

What about these things?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Ah, yes, the little pottery Santa Clauses. You'd like one, sir? To Brighton Hearth and Home for the coming yule season.

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe. I saw one of them a little while ago. You know where they came from?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Why, why, yes. Mexico. La Paz in lower California.

[Jeff Regan]

You got any broken ones?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, now, it's a very queer thing that you should ask that.

[Ward Hamilton]

Why?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Because somebody else came here and asked exactly the same question.

[Jeff Regan]

Don't tell me. Tall, good looker, green eyes, about 30?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Why, yes. How could you know that?

[Jeff Regan]

It figures. Name? Lorna Lee Lovely. Well, I don't know about that.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

The Santa Clauses are imported by the La Paz Importing Company. Small importers. We took 500 on consignment. She merely said she was a representative of the La Paz Company.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Sure.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Just a moment, sir. I don't know that I should discuss this with you.

[Jeff Regan]

Oh, here's my identification. What was the connection between Jud Brown and these Santa Clauses from Mexico?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

The broken Santa Claus?

[Ward Hamilton]

Go on.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, last Friday, a week ago today, Brown noticed that one of these little Santa Claus sets was damaged. Naturally, Jensen's does not sell damaged goods.

[Jeff Regan]

So you gave it to Judd Brown.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

As a matter of fact, I did. Going through the proper channels, of course. He said he wanted to give it to his nephew for Christmas.

[Jeff Regan]

You gave the broken Santa Claus to Brown?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes.

[Jeff Regan]

Then Lorna Lee Lovely shows up on Monday and asks about the broken Santa Claus. You tell her you give it to Jud Brown.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes, that's what I did.

[Ward Hamilton]

Yeah.

[Jeff Regan]

It's an inside bet that the next question she asked was, how do I find Jud Brown?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Exactly. I didn't tell her. So she went to the personnel department after she left me and asked questions about Mr. Brown. Now Brown has disappeared. Jensen's Toyland is without a Santa Claus. If there's anything you can do to.

[Jeff Regan]

Help, I'll see what I can dig up.

But Big up was too true. I got down to the street in front of Jensen's store and the late editions of the papers had hit the stands. They had a big story. Front page, colorful. A broken Santa Claus had been found on the railroad tracks near Union Station. Only this Santa Claus was real. Or used to be. You guessed it. Judd Brown.

Well, I checked in at the International Detective Bureau office to film my boss, the lion, in on some angles. Like, for instance, a female of the blowtorch species named Lorna Lee Lovely wants to find Jud Brown. So she makes up a phony story about him being her husband and hires me to do the trace job. But Brown finds me. Then some muscle finds us. He tags me out, and when I wake up, Brown's gone, the muscle's gone. And when I check the Rose Ballroom, Lorna Lee Lovely's gone. That took care of my 50 buck retraining. But the lion doesn't like to lose a client in the middle of a case.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

And you say Miss Lorna Lee Lovely checked out of the Sunrise Motel? Just before you got there.

[Jeff Regan]

So Thorne said he's the owner of the joint.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, pity. Jeffrey. Our client.

[Jeff Regan]

Our client gave us a sour pic.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

So it would seem. I checked the insurance companies as you suggested, Jeffrey. No Jud Brown insured with any of them.

[Jeff Regan]

He could use some insurance now.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

So I've just been reading in the paper. Dead on the railroad tracks. The poor boy got the damaged pottery Santa Claus at the department store. Then quite obviously, Lorna Lee Lovely and that man Felipe set out to hunt him down. But why, Jeffrey?

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe there's something in the Santa Claus.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

You know that.

[Jeff Regan]

It figures.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yes, I see. Smuggling. You mean over the Mexican border?

[Jeff Regan]

Could be.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Of course. Of course. The man, Felipe a smuggler, perhaps. Marijuana, Jeffrey in the Santa Claus.

[Jeff Regan]

Who knows? That's one of the things I'm gonna find out.

It figured that tracing the broken Santa Claus that got Jud Brown killed would give me my answers. So I decided to start at the beginning. I went to the New Canton Hotel where Brown had been hiding out. A Chinese kid with glasses the size of Portholes was sitting behind the hotel desk. You want something? Judd Brown live here? Why you want him? Want to see him?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

He not here. Who are you? Your name, please.

[Jeff Regan]

Never mind reaching in the drawer. You won't be needing that gun.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Why you want Judd Brown?

[Jeff Regan]

He murdered.

Check.

What do you know about it?

Sure, like I figured myself. Anything else?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I know nothing. He come, he go, he dead.

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe I could take a look at his room.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, no, no. Police say no.

[Jeff Regan]

They've been here already.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, here. Room all sealed up by police. They take everything.

[Jeff Regan]

Police station, everything.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, yes. Clean up whole room.

[Jeff Regan]

Thanks.

But that didn't turn out to be any Good, either. The Santa Claus wasn't in the stuff the cops picked up in Judd Brown's room. I phoned the Chinese desk clerk at the New Canton Hotel. Descriptions of Lorna Lee, Lovely and Felipe. Figured they might have beat the cops of the hotel and grabbed the Santa. But he'd been on duty since 6pm and you had to pass him to get upstairs. And he'd never seen or heard of either one of them that made the score at the end of the quarter. Nothing than nothing. But when I dropped by the office half an hour later, the lion's blood pressure hit the gong and won the kewpie doll. And it looked like one side or the other was lining up to score a touchdown.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey. Jeffrey, Here you are. I've been trying to locate you everywhere.

[Jeff Regan]

You lonesome?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, don't joke. Be serious. Something has happened.

[Jeff Regan]

Like what?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

She's telephoned, Jeffrey. She's telephoned here, you mean.

[Jeff Regan]

Lovely phone.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

10 minutes ago.

[Jeff Regan]

What did she say? What was she.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

She wants to see you, Jeffrey. Jeffrey, I didn't know what to do. Ought I To notify the police or. Since she'. Client.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay, so what did you do?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, I did. Well, Jeffrey, I did nothing.

[Jeff Regan]

It figures.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

It was only 10 minutes ago.

[Jeff Regan]

Sure. Well, where was she?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Lonely.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Lovely.

[Narrator]

Where was she?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, yes. Echo Park, Jeffrey, On Glendale Boulevard. The little lake where the boats are. She said she'd be on the boat platform. She said if I could find you. Everywhere you going?

[Jeff Regan]

Echo Park Lake.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Need both hands to paddle, dream boy. Maybe I do, maybe you don't, Dream boy. You do everything so good. Thanks. Vegan.

[Jeff Regan]

Why are we here, baby?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

On the lake. Dark. Nobody can see us.

[Jeff Regan]

Like the law.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Sure. That's right. You want to talk business?

[Jeff Regan]

Got another dead husband. You want to kill Jeb on.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Oh, I lied to you.

[Jeff Regan]

You killed Jeb Brown.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Felipe peeled him and you to the alley past the Rose Ballroom. Got scared. Maybe Brown could identify him. So, yeah, dream boy, yeah. Who's got the Santa Claus?

[Jeff Regan]

That turns out to be the Six Feet under question.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Maybe you've had it.

[Jeff Regan]

So that's why you want to talk business. I'm the next Jud Brown.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Oh, not you, Zina. It'd be a waste. Now you're too good to go. I was thinking partners. I got a lot.

[Ward Hamilton]

Yeah?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

What have I got, Reagan? You've got the Santa Claus.

[Jeff Regan]

Sorry, baby. Not my line of work.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Change your line. You like big dill?

[Jeff Regan]

Seen a guy who doesn't?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Okay. Bring me the Santa Claus.

[Jeff Regan]

Sorry, baby.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Sorry, Regan. It could have been nice.

[Jeff Regan]

Put that gun back in your purse.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Where's the Santa Claus, Regan? I want it. I want it real bad.

[Jeff Regan]

Sure, those pearls would look good around your neck.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

How'd you get that?

[Jeff Regan]

That there were pearls in the Santa Claus? You just told me.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

You're a wise guy, Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

Thanks. So there are pearls in the Santa Claus. The lion figured it was marijuana. But it was just one Santa Claus you were after, sister. But there wouldn't be enough marijuana and one to be worth the trouble. What comes from La Paz, that's worth.

[Ward Hamilton]

A lot of dough.

[Jeff Regan]

Pearls, baby. I forget pearls.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Now, do you want to go partners? There were 12 Santa Clauses that had pearls in that ship. On a 500amatch string worth 60,000 bucks, Regan. The broken Santa Clauses had the pearls. They weren't ever supposed to get into the store.

[Jeff Regan]

But one got away and Jud Brown got it.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

And now you've got it.

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe not.

[Ward Hamilton]

Oh, well.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Think fast, Regan. I'm not scared to shoot. Nobody'd hear the shot. Backfire from the traffic. That's what they'd think.

[Jeff Regan]

Sure. Sure they would.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

I shove you over the side of the canoe. It was dark. Nobody sees that.

[Jeff Regan]

We're going back to the dark.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Shoot, Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

You won't get me.

[Ernest Smith]

I'm in too deep. I'll shoot.

[Jeff Regan]

That wouldn't get to your Santa Claus even if I had.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Shoot Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Shoot, Regan. You stinking rat.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay. Give me that gun.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Give me your. Oh, the gun. The canoes. Get.

Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

Regan.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Help.

[Mary Winter]

Drowning.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

What's the matter, baby?

[Mary Winter]

Help me.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I got drowning in four feet of water.

[Jeff Regan]

Put your feet on the bottom. You're not in as deep as you think you are.

[Mary Winter]

You loud.

[Jeff Regan]

But you're in deep enough. Philippe is accomplice of the murder of Judd Brown. Come on, baby. You're going to jail to dry off.

So I dropped Lonely Lovely off at the nearest precinct station and went to my place and changed my clothes. I still had two things to turn up. Felipe and the toy Santa Claus with the pearls in its belly. It figured this way. If one thing can't have happened but nothing else could have happened then the thing that can't have happened must have happened. See what I mean? So I went to where the missing Santa Claus had to be.

[Ward Hamilton]

Hey.

[Jeff Regan]

Hey, wake up.

Yeah.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Ma.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Noi.

[Jeff Regan]

Ma. Keep on the job, pilgrim.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Oh. Oh, you detective, you come back.

[Jeff Regan]

They work you long hours, don't they?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Oh. Oh, yes.

[Jeff Regan]

Long hours. You've been on duty here at the desk since 6:00pm oh, yes, yes, true. Nobody can go up to the rooms without walking past you.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

No, no. Cannot do it.

[Jeff Regan]

I got figured. Okay, where's the Santa Claus?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, no, no, no. Santa Claus don't have it.

[Jeff Regan]

You got it. You took it out of Jud Brown's room before the cops got here.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Yeah, but Santa Claus all broken, nothing.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yes.

[Jeff Regan]

You saw Brown's picture in the paper and read he'd been murdered. So you went up to his room for a look around. But you saw the Santa Claus, figured Brown wouldn't be wanting it.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

The Santa Claus are broken. Nothing I want for only small sister.

[Jeff Regan]

You arrest me, nobody's gonna arrest you. Cause you're right. It is broken when you say it's nothing. Nope. That doesn't figure.

The Chinese desk clerk got me the Santa Claus he'd borrowed out of Judd Brown's room. The pearls were in it. They were nice, sleek, fat, pure pearl white. Well, lonerly lovely was in the lockup. So that left just Felipe. I didn't know where Felipe was, but that didn't worry me. I told the Chinese desk clerk that if anybody came around asking questions it was okay to say I had the Santa Claus. Then I bought a book and some sandwiches and beer and spent a nice quiet weekend at home. I hadn't been out of my apartment when the lion showed up Monday night.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Regan, I know you're in there. Regan, open this door.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay, okay.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, this is insufferable. Why haven't you come to the office? What have you been doing? Why haven't you answered your telephone?

[Jeff Regan]

Run along, fatso. I want to be alone.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, our agency is working on a murder case. Felipe callous, cold hearted killer of that boy, Judd Brown. And you, Jeffrey, what are you doing?

[Jeff Regan]

Staying home and catching up on my reading.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Then it's true. You've quit, abandoned ship, betrayed the flag.

[Jeff Regan]

And eaten 11 Liverworth sandwiches in three days. Now beat it, will you? I'm expecting company.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Company? Jeffrey, what happened to the lights?

[Jeff Regan]

They've gone up. There's a fuse box down the hall. Looks like the company I've been expecting has come.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Jeffrey.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey. It's not that.

[Jeff Regan]

That Felipe could be Lion.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Then you found him.

[Jeff Regan]

Didn't have to. Figured if I had the Santa Claus, he'd find me.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

So that's why you stayed home. Clever. Very clever. Jim.

[Jeff Regan]

Hold it, Lion.

[Ward Hamilton]

Who's that?

[Jeff Regan]

Stay still, Lion. Who's there?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Look out your ear.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

I got him.

[Jeff Regan]

He was a blacker shape and the black blackness of the room.

He shot twice before.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

He thought I was.

[Jeff Regan]

But he was wild in the dark and I closed on him. The gun went off again when I got his arm again. And then I had him around the shoulders and we went down. This is for that staff you gave me in the alley, buster. This was once on the house.

Hey, lion, there's a flashlight on the table in front of the window. Get it, will you?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

He shouldn't he, Jeffrey.

[Jeff Regan]

And you don't hit me again.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Don't hit me again, Reggie. Now let's take a look at this. Felipe. Jeffrey. Aha.

[Jeff Regan]

Not Felipe Lyon. Thorne of the Sunrise Motel.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Have it last, Jeffrey?

[Jeff Regan]

No, thanks.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

You know, ever since I've had this mountain spring water dispenser put into the office, I've been feeling better and better.

Oh, splendid for the help. Or perhaps I feel good because of the way we solved the Santa Claus case.

[Jeff Regan]

The way we solved it. Thanks, Fatso.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

So that Sunrise Motel man, Thorne was Lorna Lee Lovely's partner and the murderer of Judd Brown after all.

[Jeff Regan]

That's right. Felipe was just a name he made up. And she followed his lead.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

The non existent suspect, the police, the gentlemen of the press. Searching three days for an inhabitant of the kingdom of Maccomacum.

[Jeff Regan]

Give me that again.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

In the Kingdom of Maccomacum.

[Jeff Regan]

What does it mean?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I don't know, Jeffrey. I don't know. I believe I heard the expression somewhere.

[Jeff Regan]

Wind tunnel with a cigar in the middle.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

You. What's that?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Me?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I don't know.

[Jeff Regan]

Fatsong. Just an expression I heard somewhere.

[Narrator]

Jeff Regan, Investigator stars Frank Graham as Regan with Frank Nelson as Anthony J. Lyon. Original music is by Dick around. Jeff Regan, Investigator, is heard each week at the same time over cbs. Bob Stevenson speaking and inviting you to be with us again next week at this same time for Jeff Regan, Investigator. This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System.

[Jeff Regan]

My name's regan. I work for anthony j. Lyon, international detective bureau. They call me the lion's eye.

[Narrator]

Wednesday at 9 and CBS brings you Jeff Regan, Investigator, starring Frank Graham as Regan. With Frank Nelson as Anthony J. Lyon. So stand by for mystery and suspense and adventure in tonight's story of some enchanted car.

[Ward Hamilton]

Hut.

[Jeff Regan]

It was just an ordinary drive in hamburger joint on Vermont off Sunset. But they called it Hamburger Heaven. And just to carry out the idea, they'd hired six angels to wait on cars. Three blondes, a redhead and two brunettes. I was lucky. I drew the redhead. Only she didn't serve up what I ordered. All she brought me was trouble. The whole thing started when there were only eight more shopping days until Christmas. I fought my way through the necktie and socks set and by the time I reached the office, I was ready to start celebrating New Year's. But my boss, the lion, had other ideas. When I walked in, all 280 pounds of him was up on an office stool. He was tacking a dried up sprig of mistletoe over the door.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey. Jeffrey, my boy. Come in, come in. The festive season is at hand.

[Jeff Regan]

How's that again?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I said, the festive season is at hand. I'm filled. Overflowing with the yuletide spirit.

[Jeff Regan]

Ah, well, you better take those nails out of your teeth before you spring a leak.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, yes.

Yeah, I guess you're right, my boy. I got carried away.

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah, sure, you and Tiny Tim. We're expecting women clients.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Women clients? Oh, oh, you mean the mistletoe. Well, Jeffrey, you never can tell when a sweet young thing might accidentally happen in.

[Jeff Regan]

Stop drooling, fatso. You dropped out of a mistletoe set 50 pounds ago.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, maybe so, but I still believe in Santa Claus. Now, where was I?

[Jeff Regan]

You were up on the stool with berries in your hair.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

No, no, I mean about the new client. What have I told you so far?

[Jeff Regan]

That the festive season is at hand.

Huh?

[Ward Hamilton]

Oh.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, then I haven't told you about our new client. His name is Ward Hamilton, Jeffrey. He was in just a few minutes ago. Fine figure of a man. Well dressed, distinguished, prosperous.

[Jeff Regan]

That explains the Christmas spirit. How much?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, the Christmas spirit cannot be measured in terms of money. This is the time of goodwill toward men of unselfish devotion.

[Jeff Regan]

Sure. How much unselfish devotion did he buy?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

$50 worth. It's something about his niece or daughter or some friend or something.

[Jeff Regan]

What about them?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, it seems this girl's been receiving packages, flowers, candy, that sort of thing.

[Jeff Regan]

What's so mysterious about that? Doesn't she know it's Christmas?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Well, for some reason or other, Ward Hamilton says she's worried about them. He'll tell you all about it when you see the address is on the desk. It's out on Iredell Road in North Hollywood.

[Jeff Regan]

So I find the Santa Claus that's been sending the packages.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Say, that's right. This case does fit right in with the season, doesn't it?

[Jeff Regan]

Sure. And Merry Christmas to you too, fatso.

That started it. I hopped in my sleigh and headed my reindeer out over Cahuenga Pass. Ira Del Road was twin rows of California bungalows with Christmas decorations strung out in front. All except one house. It was the address lion had given me. Redwood front on the usual cream colored stucco, white ranch type. Fence. Swimming pool in the backyard. No Christmas anywhere. Behind the fence. A big Dalmatian wagged his tail and grinned at me in a nice friendly sort of way. Only he was growling when he did it. I circled wide and made the porch, but I didn't get as far as the doorbell. What do you want, Mr. Hamilton? I'm Regan, International.

[Ward Hamilton]

Regan. Oh, yes, the detective. Come in, Mr. Regan. Come in.

[Jeff Regan]

He was big and gray haired, the man of distinction. But what he had in his hand wasn't a glass. It was a whip. Black, 10ft long, with lead weights at the tip.

[Ward Hamilton]

In here. I appreciate you coming right out, Mr. Regan. I like to get prompt action.

[Jeff Regan]

Is that what you use that for?

[Ward Hamilton]

Well. Oh, the whip. No, no, no. Just a hobby of mine. I practice hitting toy ducks floating in the swimming pool.

[Jeff Regan]

Nice way to get use out of your pool during the winter season.

[Ward Hamilton]

Well, yes. Never mind that. Sit down, Mr. Riggin. I want to tell you about Mary.

[Jeff Regan]

That's the niece.

[Ward Hamilton]

Niece? No, no relation. I'm a close friend of her family's. Her parents died several years ago. There was no one else. So I've tried to take over the reins and help the girl along. It hasn't been easy.

[Jeff Regan]

She isn't broken to harness.

[Ward Hamilton]

It's a nice metaphor, but it doesn't fit. Not at all. Mary Winter is a strange girl. Very strange.

[Jeff Regan]

She's the shy, retiring type.

[Ward Hamilton]

Ah, I see. The detective training. You're thinking ahead, assuming that she's not attractive to men. Nothing could be further from the truth. She's a lovely girl.

[Jeff Regan]

Very lovely.

[Ward Hamilton]

Auburn hair, green eyes, fine, firm, youthful figure. Desirable is the word, Mr. Regan. Desirable. You understand what I mean?

[Jeff Regan]

You make it pretty clear. So that brings us to the anonymous packages.

[Ward Hamilton]

For almost six weeks someone has been sending Mary gifts almost every day. Flowers, candy, novelties, that sort of thing. No name, no indication where they come from.

[Jeff Regan]

Mary has no idea either?

[Ward Hamilton]

No, but she's reacted to them badly. They're making her nervous, upset. There's something I can't afford to have happen. Come again, Mr. Regan? I can observe that there's little use in trying to keep anything back from you. My interest in the package matter is because of money.

[Jeff Regan]

Now the story begins to make sense.

[Ward Hamilton]

Mary is strange. Perhaps I should have said peculiar. Her aversion to men is almost. Well, I've been sending her to a Mr. Farthing, a human relations counselor.

[Jeff Regan]

A psychologist.

[Ward Hamilton]

Something like that.

[Jeff Regan]

And it costs money.

[Ward Hamilton]

Yes, it costs money. The more delay in cure, the more it costs. Frankly, Mr. Regan, I'm tired Of the obligation.

[Jeff Regan]

She work?

[Ward Hamilton]

Yes. She works at one of those drive in stands, car up.

[Jeff Regan]

Something wrong with that?

[Ward Hamilton]

The place is called hamburger heaven, Mr. Riggins.

[Jeff Regan]

And you want me to find the guy who sends the packages so he'll marry her or so you can get rid of him.

[Ward Hamilton]

It works the same either way. You'll take the job, Mr. Regan?

[Jeff Regan]

Sure. I'll find your guy. Maybe he'll look good under your Christmas tree.

Ward Hamilton gave me the girl's address in Hollywood. It was a tired stucco 4 flat just off Kingsley. The home of Mary Winter, the girl who hated men. And then it was too easy. Standing out front near the curb was a little man in a trench coat. He carried an umbrella over his arm and he paced up and down, watching the apartment. That was too good a bet to pass up.

You going somewhere?

[Ernest Smith]

I beg your pardon?

[Jeff Regan]

Someone you know lives in there.

[Ernest Smith]

Why.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Why?

[Ernest Smith]

That's none of your business, sir.

[Jeff Regan]

The name of the friend wouldn't be Mary Winter?

[Ernest Smith]

Get out of my way.

[Jeff Regan]

That's what I thought.

Hold it.

[Ernest Smith]

Let go of my aunt.

[Jeff Regan]

Let go, I say.

Why are you watching Mary Winter's apartment?

[Ernest Smith]

I warned you.

[Ward Hamilton]

Let go. Let go.

[Ernest Smith]

Very well, I'll answer you.

[Jeff Regan]

The umbrella in his hand came down on my wrists and he broke for the corner. By the time I turned, he was out of sight. On the ground, broken, was the little man's umbrella. I picked it up. Real break. Name engraved on the handle in nice big gold letters. It said Smith. I headed for Mary Winter's apartment.

I knocked and nothing happened. Knock again. The radio in the room told me somebody was in and liked their music loud. I tried the door and it worked. I stuck my head in to look around. A redhead came in from another room in slacks and halter. She saw me. She dived for the closet, came out wearing a coat. Then she snapped off the radio.

[Mary Winter]

Get out of here.

[Jeff Regan]

Look, I tried knocking, but.

[Mary Winter]

Get out before I call the police.

[Jeff Regan]

The name's Regan Ward. Hamilton sent me.

[Mary Winter]

You're. You're lying. You're trying to trick me.

[Jeff Regan]

Phone him. He'll tell you.

[Mary Winter]

What do you want?

[Jeff Regan]

About the presents you've been getting. Tell me.

[Mary Winter]

I. I'm not sure. I can't trust you.

[Jeff Regan]

Look, for the last time, I'm supposed to find out who's sending them. Either you help or you don't. Now take your choice.

[Mary Winter]

All right, I'll listen. But don't you come a step closer.

[Jeff Regan]

I sat down. One corner of the room. Redhead. Other corner. She was tall, graceful, beautiful. Everything a guy could want. Except for the look in her eyes. Scared. Hunted. I waited for her to start it.

[Mary Winter]

They began several weeks ago. The presents. I. I don't know who is sending them or why, but.

[Jeff Regan]

Any card identification?

[Mary Winter]

No, nothing.

[Jeff Regan]

You sure?

[Mary Winter]

You think I'd accept gifts from a stranger?

[Jeff Regan]

Take it easy.

Nobody said that. What did Farthing tell you?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Farthing?

[Jeff Regan]

This Human Relations Council, do you go to?

[Mary Winter]

Oh, you know about that?

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah, I know about that. What'd he say?

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

That.

[Mary Winter]

That I shouldn't worry. That I. I should find out.

[Jeff Regan]

Is that all?

[Mary Winter]

You don't understand. You're like all of them.

[Ernest Smith]

Get out of here.

[Jeff Regan]

Wait. One question. You know a Little guy, about 30, carries an umbrella, wears a trench coat?

[Ward Hamilton]

Shy?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

No. No.

[Jeff Regan]

Are you sure? Think a little guy.

[Mary Winter]

No, no, I don't know him. I've never met him in my life.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Get out.

[Jeff Regan]

I left the redhead sobbing softly to herself. Maybe a lot of flowers and candy would be kind of nice to a lot of people during Christmas. But not to Merry winter. She was mixed up inside and out. I headed back to my car. And then I was mixed up. It had looked easy until I got to my car. That's when I got complications. A big complication. Fat 40 with a gun.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Get in, Shammas.

[Jeff Regan]

Now what?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Your choice, Shammas.

[Jeff Regan]

Like what?

[Ward Hamilton]

The Winter dame.

[Jeff Regan]

Uh, your property.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Not my type.

[Jeff Regan]

Belong to the boss.

[Ward Hamilton]

Question.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Shammos. Uh.

[Jeff Regan]

Beat it, will you?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I'm not through with you.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay, get through.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Stay away from Merry Winter or you get trouble.

[Ward Hamilton]

Real bad trouble.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Any questions Now, Shammas.

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah. Who pays you?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

You shouldn't have asked that question.

[Jeff Regan]

It looked like it was gonna be a real holiday season. Brotherly love all over the place.

The next stop was a man named Mr. Farthing. Only the sign on the door said John J. Farthing, Human relations Counselor. It was a plush layout waiting room the size of a box top. Rich, solid, lined with deep green leather chairs, brass studs on the wall. Van Gogh, Gauguin, that kind of stuff. The receptionist was out and I took a crack at the thick mahogany door.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Yes?

[Jeff Regan]

Come in, please.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

What may I do for you, sir?

[Jeff Regan]

The name's Regan. International detective.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Oh, sit down, Mr. Regan. Now, is something troubling you?

[Jeff Regan]

Girl named Winter. Mary winter.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Go on, Mr. Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

She's a patient of yours? Why do you ask a couple of questions about him?

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

I see.

[Jeff Regan]

Since you know her background, I thought you could fill me in on a few things.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

I said I heard you, Mr. Regan. Well, perhaps, sir, you're aware of the nature of my work. Since I assume you're an intelligent man, I don't believe it's necessary to be much more explicit than that.

[Jeff Regan]

Try it for size.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Very well.

Cigarette, Mr. Regan?

[Jeff Regan]

Thanks.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

There is in existence a code of ethics. Some practitioners call it the Hippocratic Oath. I'm not a doctor, as you know. Yet I, too, Mr. Regan, have a moral code.

[Jeff Regan]

I'm listening.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Nothing in my code, either morally, ethically or in any other way allows me to discuss the affairs of my patients. Is that clear?

[Jeff Regan]

Yeah, that's clear.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

I'm sorry I can't assist you in whatever it is you're trying to do, Mr. Regan. I like to help, but as you see, my hands are tied.

[Jeff Regan]

That makes two of us. Thanks. Thanks a lot.

Mr. Farthing. Gray suit, ivory cigarette holder and gold cufflinks. Stood up and shook hands solemnly. I left. He'd given me nothing. There was only one thing wrong with that. Mr. Farthing was right.

I decided to check in with my boss, Anthony J. Lyon.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

The International Detective Agency.

[Ward Hamilton]

Anthony.

[Jeff Regan]

Save it for the customers, Fatsu.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, where have you been?

[Jeff Regan]

Look, I just started this business two hours ago. What's eaten you?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Just this. I have here in my office with me a young man. He has an interesting story, Jeffrey. It seems he's been sending gifts to one merry winter.

[Ward Hamilton]

What?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

That's correct, Regan. The man you're supposed to be looking for. Well, don't just stand there. Get over here at once. This young man can't wait all day for lazy detectives. And besides, he needs help.

[Jeff Regan]

He needs help?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

That's right, Jeffrey. The man you were supposed to find. His life's in danger.

[Narrator]

This is cbs, and you are listening to Jeff Regan, investigator. In tonight's adventure, some Enchanted car hop.

[Jeff Regan]

It started when a guy named Ward Hamilton hired the lion and me to find out who was sending packages to a car hop named Mary Winter. I met a little guy with an umbrella and a big guy with a gun and a human relations counselor who called himself Mr. Farthing. Then I phoned my boss, Anthony J. Lyon, and found the mysterious Santa Claus who'd been sending the girl gifts had walked right into our office. When I got there, I found the lion sitting with his fingertips touching as he talked to the man across the desk from him. Like I guessed, it was the same guy I'd seen outside Mary Wood his apartment. The little guy, 30, trench coat and nervous.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey. Jeffrey, come in, come in. I want you to meet our new client, Mr. Smith. Mr. Ernest Smith. He's in trouble.

[Jeff Regan]

Well, if he isn't, he should be.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, what on earth do you mean.

[Jeff Regan]

I found your Mr. Smith outside the girl's apartment. He wasn't looking for frost on those windows.

[Ernest Smith]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, Mr. Regan.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

That's what Mr. Smith is trying to say. Jeffrey, is that. That's not true. Mr. Smith is in real trouble.

[Jeff Regan]

You sell it to him.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, how can you say such a thing? Mr. Smith feels his life is in danger. Hence he has retained us to act in his behalf.

[Ernest Smith]

That's true, Mr. Regan. I'll admit I sent the gifts to Ms. Winter. I didn't realize. I didn't know.

[Jeff Regan]

Get to the point.

[Ernest Smith]

Now. Now. I'm afraid since I saw you this afternoon, someone's following me.

[Jeff Regan]

Fat guy, big coat?

[Ernest Smith]

Yes. I came here for help. Someone doesn't like my sending the gifts.

[Jeff Regan]

Well, that's real bright. You can start with Mary Winter.

[Ernest Smith]

She doesn't like them, Mr. Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

Then there's a guy named Hamilton.

[Ernest Smith]

She. She's married.

[Jeff Regan]

Call him a guardian. Family friend. Finish your story.

[Ernest Smith]

I. I like Ms. Winter. I. I wanted to do something for her.

[Jeff Regan]

So you've been sending her anonymous presents for almost six weeks. Isn't that carrying the Christmas spirit too far?

[Ernest Smith]

Well. Well, I. I like her. That's not abnormal, is it, Mr. Reagan?

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Of course not, Mr. Smith.

[Jeff Regan]

You keep out of this, fatso.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

But, Jeffrey, I'll client.

[Jeff Regan]

We got another client named Hamilton, remember? Besides, you haven't met the girl.

[Ernest Smith]

Neither have I.

[Jeff Regan]

What?

[Ernest Smith]

I've never met Mary Winter. Is that abnormal, Mr. Regan? Oh, dear, dear. Perhaps I'm sicker than Mr. Farthing told me.

[Jeff Regan]

Say that again.

[Ernest Smith]

Mr. Farthing? My human relations counselor. He takes care of me.

[Jeff Regan]

Wait a minute. Maybe this is gonna add up. You've never met Mary Winter?

[Ernest Smith]

No.

[Jeff Regan]

Now, but you've seen her. You've seen her in the waiting room of farthing's office.

[Ernest Smith]

Why, Mr. Regan, how on earth did you guess? That's exactly it. She was reading a copy of Reader's Digest, and I was reading an old National Geographic. It was a fall.

[Jeff Regan]

Never mind. Well, Lion, I think that wraps that up.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, what do you mean?

[Jeff Regan]

Mary Winter is afraid of unknown guy sending packages. Unknown guy turns out to be Smith. Take Smith to marry. Show her he's harmless. Collect our feet.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

But, Jeffrey, what about Mr. Smith? What about the man who's following him?

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe he just imagined it. Come on, Smith. We're gonna visit a redhead.

The lion didn't believe Smith imagined it any more than I did, but he only sputtered. And I loaded Smith into the car and headed out to Mary Winter's apartment. It Looked simple then, like a glass of mild eggnog. What I didn't know was that somebody had slipped me a zombie.

It was turning dark when we pulled up in front of the place. Smith stayed at my heels like a sheepdog. I knocked this time, she opened the door.

[Mary Winter]

Mr. Regan, what are you doing here?

[Jeff Regan]

Brought your Christmas present. Only this one's harmless.

[Ernest Smith]

Oh, no.

[Jeff Regan]

Take it easy, sweetheart. Just a guy named Smith. You might even like him.

[Mary Winter]

No. No, please go away.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Please.

[Jeff Regan]

Smith and I walked on in and Mary backed into a chair in the far corner of the room. She and Smith looked at each other and didn't say anything. So I waited for the sparks to die out of her eyes. But they didn't. There was something else on her mind.

[Mary Winter]

This. This is the man who sent the packages.

[Jeff Regan]

You guessed it. Smith. Mary Winter. Mary Winter. Smith.

[Mary Winter]

Get him out of here.

[Jeff Regan]

Huh?

[Mary Winter]

I said get him out of here before. Before he kills me.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, no.

[Jeff Regan]

Sit down. Now, just a minute, lady. He won't hurt anybody. Just take it easy, will you? Just take quiet.

[Mary Winter]

That's what you mean.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Oh, no.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

No, I'm not.

[Jeff Regan]

Listen, sweetheart.

Wait a minute.

It's Christmas. You've heard of that, I think, haven't you? People send presents to each other because it makes them feel good. Now, Smith sent you presents for the same reason.

[Mary Winter]

He's going to kill me. You're like he is, trying to trap me.

[Jeff Regan]

Oh, that does it.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

All right.

[Mary Winter]

Look at this.

[Jeff Regan]

What a card it came in.

[Mary Winter]

A box of flowers was delivered here to my apartment tonight.

[Jeff Regan]

Each man kills the thing he loves.

[Mary Winter]

Well, Regan, try and explain that.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Try and shut up.

[Jeff Regan]

Did you send this, Smith?

[Ernest Smith]

No, no, Mr. Regan, I didn't send it. I sent flowers and candy and nice.

[Mary Winter]

Things, Mr. Regan, at the window.

[Jeff Regan]

I left them with their mouths open and ran for the hall. And then outside. The girl may have had an overworked imagination, but her mind didn't knock over that garbage can.

It was dark and peaceful and still outside. Me and a half moon and nobody else. And then I saw him. Thickset, crouched, moving away from the window. I dove after him.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Dove.

[Jeff Regan]

We went down together. As his hand came out of his pocket, the heavy gray.45 got itself in my direction and I grabbed at the wrist behind him. The gun fell into the rose bush, but he got to his feet.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

I warned you once, Shammus.

[Jeff Regan]

Stay away from that girl.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Who said so?

[Jeff Regan]

Never mind.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Get off that case now, before it's too late. It'll only mean.

[Jeff Regan]

Were you gonna say trouble?

The big guy was 200 pounds of unconscious. As I bent over him, a heavy camel hair coat was wrapped around him. The same guy I'd seen before. I unbuttoned the coat, figuring some identification might help. Only when it came open, I didn't need any more. He was wearing a tailored starch jacket. It wasn't the kind you see every day. It was white. That gave me the lead I needed, and I headed fast for my car. Ten minutes later, I stopped at a drugstore on my way out to the Valley. I phoned the lion and told him to check on Farthing. Then I headed the car out Cawenga. The pass was crowded with home from work traffic. It took me 25 minutes to make. Ira Del Road and the home of Ward Hamilton.

This time the dalmatian was out for the night. But Ward Hamilton wasn't. He opened the door.

[Ward Hamilton]

Well, well, Mr. Reagan. Come in. You work late.

[Jeff Regan]

Our time clock's out of order.

[Ward Hamilton]

Perhaps you'd like one for Christmas?

[Jeff Regan]

No, thanks. Wouldn't fit in my sock.

[Ward Hamilton]

Well, Mr. Regan, I take it by this visit that you have good news for me.

[Jeff Regan]

Call it that.

[Ward Hamilton]

You know who's been sending the girl those gifts?

[Jeff Regan]

Guy named Smith.

[Ward Hamilton]

How's that again?

[Jeff Regan]

Smith. Ernest Smith, his birth certificate says.

[Ward Hamilton]

I'm afraid I've never heard of him, Mr. Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

He saw Mary in the waiting room of Farthing's office. Never met her. Shy little guy.

[Ward Hamilton]

Well, now, isn't that something? Well, I must say, Mr. Regan, you did a remarkably fast job.

[Jeff Regan]

There's something else you ought to know, Hamilton. Chances are farthings are phony.

[Ward Hamilton]

Mr. Farthing, looks like. Why, it seems absurd.

[Jeff Regan]

Just thought I'd let you know.

Want me to go on with the case?

[Ward Hamilton]

What do you mean? Mr. Regan?

[Jeff Regan]

I found your guy, Smith. That's what you hired me for. And when I get to Farthing, he'll.

[Ward Hamilton]

Sing like a prima donna saying, talk, then keep going.

[Jeff Regan]

Okay, Hamilton, it's your money.

[Ward Hamilton]

It's your life. Mr. Regan, be careful.

[Jeff Regan]

I made a fast phone call to the lion on my way back into town, and that tied it up. Farthing was working late when I got there. Only when he looked up and saw me, he wasn't happy.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

What do you want?

[Jeff Regan]

Conversation. A lot of it.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Mr. Regan, I must ask why you've come to my office at this hour.

[Jeff Regan]

I told you, for conversation.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Then I may regard this whole thing as a sort of joke.

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe only the laughs you'll get wouldn't get by even on television.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

I demand an explanation of your attitude.

[Jeff Regan]

Fair enough. Start with your name. Not Farthing. It's Farnham. Howard Farnham. You want more?

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Where did you get that?

[Jeff Regan]

I had a phone conversation with my boss. He's got ways of getting things. Like your record. Five arrests, bunco. One arrest, forgery. One arrest. Fraud.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

No convictions.

[Jeff Regan]

You were lucky. Maybe you won't be this time.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

You haven't got anything on me, Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

How about blackmail?

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Not a chance.

[Jeff Regan]

Maybe not yet. Only you were getting set for a job. I believe the guy's name was Hamilton.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

You can't prove it.

[Jeff Regan]

Well, there was your mug. The big guy in the white jacket. He meant business. Does he do your legwork?

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Listen, Regan, you can't pin blackmail on me. Sure, maybe I had ideas, but I don't claim. I'm a doctor. I don't hand out any pills. Just advice, Regan, that's all. Just advice.

[Jeff Regan]

That's too bad. You know, there are a lot of people that take phonies like you seriously, Farnum. A lot of people that could use advice. Real advice.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Mine's real. They say, should I marry him? And I say, yes or no, depending.

[Jeff Regan]

On how much there is in it for you.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

What do you want from me, Regan?

[Jeff Regan]

Who paid you to put the bee on Mary Winter?

[Ward Hamilton]

Never mind, Farthing. You won't have to answer that.

[Jeff Regan]

Come on in, Hamilton. I've been waiting for you.

[Ward Hamilton]

You're bragging, Mr. Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

It made sense if I could get you to join Farthing and me. You might have something to say. You're showing up. Check my story.

[Ward Hamilton]

What story?

[Jeff Regan]

Like this man named Hamilton's supposed to look out for a young redhead named Mary Winter. Only Hamilton takes one look at this number and suddenly he's not fatherly anymore. He decides to move in for himself. Absurd, is it? You convinced the girl she couldn't trust any man in the world. But you should have been the other way around. You're the one she couldn't trust. Isn't that right, Farthing?

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Leave me out of this, Regan. I run a legitimate business.

[Jeff Regan]

Leave you out? Well, that wouldn't be fair. You were the guy Hamilton came to with money. He paid you to tell Mary Winter who's the man for her. Am I right, Farthing?

[Ward Hamilton]

You're lying, Regan. No.

[Jeff Regan]

No, I'm not. Everything worked fine until along came a nice, shy little guy with an umbrella. Mr. Smith met Mary in Farthing's waiting room. Starting to send me your presents. You know, that must have really stopped you, Hamilton. Trying to figure out who was cutting in on your Romeo act.

[Ward Hamilton]

Regan, I've had enough out of you. I thought you were getting nosy.

[Jeff Regan]

You had me to find the guy. And I did end a story. Except if anybody should happen to tell Mary Winter what kind of a guy you really are, Hamilton, you might suddenly find yourself out of a lifetime career.

[Ward Hamilton]

You'll never tell her again. I'll see to that.

[Jeff Regan]

Forget one item for a last touch. You send Mary a threatening note, really put the pressure on.

You're washed up, Hamilton.

[Ward Hamilton]

This revolver says I'm not Mr. Regan. Farthing, come over here out of the way. We're going to take care of Mr. Regan.

[Jeff Regan]

Self defense? Not a chance with Farthing's record. Am I right, Farnum?

[Ward Hamilton]

Do as I say, Farthing.

[Jeff Regan]

Go ahead, Farnum, go ahead. Murder will look good on your list.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

I won't play ball, Hamilton. I told the girl what you wanted, but I'm not in this. It's your fight.

[Ward Hamilton]

I can make it yours.

[John J. Farthing / Howard Farnham]

Don't try it.

[Ward Hamilton]

I am as good with this gun, gentlemen, as I am with a whip.

[Jeff Regan]

Farnham, watch out.

Farnum ducked as I hit Hamilton's wrist. The bullet buried itself in the desktop.

And the gun hit the floor.

I got the gun as Hamilton moved in fast. Only what he got for his trouble was the barrel across his head.

Farnum crawled up to his chair, sat down, puffing. I let him catch his breath. When I waved the gun in his direction, he didn't mind phoning the police.

The heavy guy in the white jacket showed up bright and early for work the next morning, and the cop greeted him with a pair of handcuffs. He got off with assault and battery, and Farnum, alias Farthing, made the blotter for a light charge. Hamilton wasn't that lucky. His read assault with intent to kill.

It was noon when I got to the Lion's office. He was admiring the Christmas tree stuck in the corner. And from the sounds that came out of his mouth, it looked like his holiday fever was becoming serious.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Nowhere, nowhere, nowhere Nowhere born is the king of. Oh, hello, Jeffrey.

[Jeff Regan]

They're looking for a replacement for Vaughn Monroe.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Geoffrey, how unkind. It's the season for song. Sunday is Christmas, my boy, and today is payday.

So it is. Well, perhaps I could manage a small token, A sign of my gratitude.

[Narrator]

Thanks.

[Lorna Lee Lovely / Lorna Lee Brown]

Yeah.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

By the way, what about Merry Winter? The car hop. How is the girl, Jeffrey?

[Jeff Regan]

Oh, I left her with Smith last night when I went after Farthing's mug.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, you didn't. Alone together. And that girl hating all men. And that boy shy backwards. Jeffrey, how could you? How cruel.

[Jeff Regan]

It's too late now, Lion. Maybe we'll read about it in the afternoon paper.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Double murder.

[Jeff Regan]

Double hamburger.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

What did you say?

[Jeff Regan]

I drove by Mary's drive in this morning. There was a car parked there.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Jeffrey, you mean?

[Jeff Regan]

Little guy behind the wheel, trench coat, umbrella. He looked an awful lot like our boy Smith. Then you talked to them for a minute.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Oh, wonderful, wonderful. Tell me, Jeffrey, tell me. What did Mary say?

[Jeff Regan]

She said, with or without onions? Merry Christmas, Lion.

[Anthony J. Lyon (The Lion)]

Merry Christmas, Jeffrey.

[Narrator]

Jeff Regan Investigator is written by William Frug and William Fifield, produced by Sterling Tracy, directed by Gordon T. Hughes and stars Frank Graham as Regan with Frank Nelson as Anthony J. Lyon. Original music is by Dick Around. Jeff Regan, Investigator has heard each week at the same time over cbs. Bob Stevenson speaking and inviting you to be with us again next week at this same time for Jeff Regan Investigator. This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System.

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