Phones Are Making You Unfunny w/ Jimmy Carr | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Summary

Podcast Summary

Podcast: 2 Bears, 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Episode: Phones Are Making You Unfunny w/ Jimmy Carr
Date: September 29, 2025
Guests: Jimmy Carr (in for Bert Kreischer), Tom Segura
Producer/Studio: YMH Studios

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Overview

This lively episode features Tom Segura chatting with legendary UK comedian Jimmy Carr (stepping in for Bert Kreischer) about how technology, especially smartphones, is affecting culture, comedy, and human connection. The conversation veers into the evolution of entertainment, the impact of quick dopamine hits, loneliness, sex and relationships, self-improvement, gratitude, and a slew of personal and professional anecdotes (with plenty of signature banter and NSFW humor).

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Culture, Technology, & the New Unfunny

• Jimmy references Mark Fisher's idea that "culture is downstream of technology" ([00:31]). The proliferation of screens, particularly phones, has transformed how people consume comedy—from communal cinema to bite-size clips on social media ([02:25]).
• "It’s like the 21st century is just the 20th century on better screens." — Jimmy Carr ([01:17])
• There’s nostalgia for ‘plays’—shared, live experiences—which are increasingly rare, replaced by solitary digital absorption ([03:39]).
• On crowd work and TikTok: “If you put up crowd work all the time, it suits people...little bite-sized chunks. It’s not as good as the real experience...” — Jimmy Carr ([02:47])
• Laughter is 30x stronger in a live audience versus alone ([02:55]).
• Phones and comedy: Tom and Jimmy agree phones are making culture more atomized and, in some ways, less funny for everyone ([02:55-04:00]).

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2. The Dopamine Economy & Loneliness

• Cheap dopamine: People increasingly settle for cheap rewards—porn, social media, video games—rather than engaging with life ([04:43]).
• "Young men are looking at porn...I'm not saying ban porn. We shouldn't be looking at porn. I'm saying, no, no, go and get your dick wet. You've got to go and do it in real life." — Jimmy Carr ([04:50])
• Proxies: Porn for sex, drugs/alcohol for fun, video games for adventure ([05:58]).
• "Video games...are a proxy for the career they're not having." — Jimmy Carr ([06:14])
• Disconnection: Modern tech enables isolation and loneliness, making mental health issues worse ([07:13]).
• “You need a village.” — Jimmy Carr ([07:13])
• Loneliness epidemic: Tom reflects on how many people lack real social bonds.
• “There’s so many people…they don’t have any of that. They live in the isolation of their life. They don’t interact with a lot of people.” — Tom Segura ([07:14])

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3. Entertainment, Music, & Movies in Flux

• They lament the loss of universally-shared reference points—previously, movies like The Matrix or Borat would give everyone common ground ([01:49-02:25]).
• Jimmy introduces generational “turnings,” predicting we’re at the end of a big cultural cycle ([23:47]).
• There’s a sense pop culture is “fracturing apart”—with film, music, and now comedy moving from the center to the margins, and the death of monoculture ([23:53], [24:25]).

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4. Comedy Careers, Luck, & Gratitude

• Both discuss how streaming and the rise of stand-up specials changed the game for comedians.
• “If I was the same guy…in 2001…maybe I could fill up a club. The times changed everything.” — Tom Segura ([20:52-22:11])
• Jimmy credits luck: “We got dealt the cards…We came along at a time when comedy was a thing.” ([06:36])
• “Pressure is a privilege…Some people don’t get to be pressured at work.” — Jimmy Carr ([40:50])
• Both reflect on how gratitude combats status-fixation and comparison ([57:01–58:06]): “The only thing that changes your disposition is kind of gratitude.” — Jimmy Carr ([57:09])

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5. Modern Dating, Relationships & Generational Shifts

• Debate on how apps like Tinder upend relationships: instant options undermine commitment ([08:33]).
• “Relationships: is it cornerstone—build together, or capstone—bolt a partner on later?” — Jimmy Carr ([16:51])
• Notably, old-school “courting” actually worked for a reason, Tom notes ([16:39-17:55]).
• Shocking stat: STDs now highest in retirement communities! “We're on our way out and we're trying to fuck.” — Tom Segura ([18:07])
• Comedy is likened to food: everyone likes something different, and that’s okay ([18:44-19:20]).

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6. Substance Use, Fads, and Wellbeing

• Jimmy’s take on weed: “Performance-inhibiting drug…should be illegal for the under 30s, legal from 30-50…then over 50 mandatory.” ([31:00])
• Tom: Dose and intent matter most for him—it’s about finding the right balance ([32:17-34:09]).
• Both have experience managing substances while performing—drinking before sets becoming a crutch, sobriety leading to clarity ([36:14-36:52]).

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7. Creative Process, Boredom & Phones

• Boredom is essential for creativity: “Boredom is just unappreciated serenity...Creativity comes from boredom. Overstimulation kills it.” — Jimmy Carr ([41:11] onward)
• Writing material happens in downtime—like driving with the radio off.
• Phones steal that generative boredom from the next generation ([42:51-43:50]).

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8. Comedy Touring: Live Work & Audience Energy

• Touring stories: why live is irreplaceable, and insider talk about taping specials, working in the round, and refining material under pressure ([37:38-41:11]).
• “You become more compelling to watch in the round—you have movement.” — Tom Segura ([38:49])

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9. Memorable Moments & Notable Quotes

• On Bert’s absence: “This is a good time to tell people he’s died.” — Jimmy Carr ([10:49])
• Stephen Hawking showing up at a show: Jimmy recalls doing jokes about Hawking, with people worried he didn’t know he was there—"He loved it!" ([44:12-44:44])
• One-night stand standards: "Men will lower their standards...Women, yeah, raise their standards for the one night stand...We go in opposite directions." — Jimmy Carr ([48:36-49:05])
• Beautiful people never interrupted: “Really beautiful people speak very slowly because they've never been interrupted.” ([52:55])
• On gratitude and contentment: “Your current happiness is your current situation minus expectations.” — Jimmy Carr ([56:27])

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 80s Music, Technology & Culture Theory: [00:13-01:17]
• Phones & Comedy Consumption: [02:25-04:00]
• Dopamine Economy/Porn/Video Games: [04:43-06:29]
• Mental Health, Loneliness Epidemic: [07:01-08:33]
• Entertainment Industry Shifts/Streaming: [20:52-24:25]
• Modern Dating/Cornerstone vs Capstone Relationships: [16:39-17:55]
• STDs in Retirement Communities: [18:00]
• Weed, Dosage & Social Drugs: [31:00-34:42]
• Comedian Substance Use & Touring: [36:14-36:48]
• Boredom, Phones & Creativity: [41:05-43:50]
• Live Comedy, Taping Specials: [37:38-41:11]
• Stephen Hawking as a Show Guest: [44:12-44:44]
• Gratitude & Perspective: [56:47-58:06]

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Memorable Quotes

• Jimmy Carr: "Culture is downstream of technology." ([00:31])
• Tom Segura: “You realize too that it’s a cheap search for dopamine...” ([05:46])
• Jimmy Carr: “Pressure is a privilege. Some people don’t get to be pressured at work.” ([40:50])
• Jimmy Carr: “Boredom is just unappreciated serenity.” ([41:11])
• Jimmy Carr: "Your current happiness is your current situation minus expectations." ([56:27])
• Jimmy Carr: "We don't make those movies anymore, so you end up with Andrew Tate online because there's a demand for that.” ([72:24])
• On one-night stands: "Men lower their standards. Women raise theirs." — Jimmy Carr ([48:36-49:05])

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Tone and Energy

Lighthearted, irreverent, and self-effacing. Both hosts blend wit, introspection, and raunchy banter—mixing sharp social commentary with comic absurdity. Jimmy especially excels at blending deep insights with jokes, while Tom anchors things with anecdotes and relatable realities.

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For New Listeners

• The episode is a thoughtful yet hilarious overview of how digital life is undermining authentic connection, creativity, and comedy—and why, despite the gadgets, nothing beats seeing a show or living life for real. Expect raucous humor interwoven with real-life reflection.

Transcript

[Tom Segura]

Sunday, October 19, at the hall at Live Casino in Hanover, Maryland. I will be throwing it down. It's one of my favorite spots to go to. Get tickets [e-mail] tour and I'll see you there.

[Jimmy Carr]

Wow. That 80s music is like. People don't give it enough credit, dude.

[Tom Segura]

And then, like, somebody throws on, like, a mixtape or something or, you know, a playlist of that, and you're like, oh, this is like the best shit. And then, you know, the funny thing, I have kids, young kids, and they love it. Well, you're like. You're like, I want interest in the music. And then you realize everything that they're like, this is good. It's like 40 or 50 years old.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, you know what the interesting thing about that for me is? There's a guy called Mark Fisher who's, like, a theorist on music. And his thing was culture is downstream of technology. So we don't see it like that because we sort of go, well, no. Culture is just kind of naturally. It's a wellspring from somewhere. It just comes from the ether. But you go, no, it's downstream in technology. So someone invented a keyboard in the mid-70s in Germany, right? And then you get Daft Punk and then you get all of that 80s pop. So they were using this new music. So there's an amazing kind of flourishing because of this technology that came along or then the ability to loop causes, like, a lot of the R B and rap stuff that we have is kind of what causes that, right? And it's slightly like there's a weird theory now that the 21st century is just the 20th century on better screens.

[Tom Segura]

That's kind of a good theory.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, what's new? Like, we're old dudes. So obviously we're gonna say that. We're gonna say, there's nothing new. There's nothing going on.

[Tom Segura]

This is too good to waste this, though.

[Jimmy Carr]

So we're not. We're probably typing, aren't we?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Hundred percent.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, okay, then. That's a good man. I was like, what the fuck? Don't waste that. That's too good.

[Jimmy Carr]

No. Well, it's. It's an interesting. It's a guy. There's a Polish philosopher called Zizhak that talks about it a lot. Like, just the idea the future's been canceled. Because you think about, like, Hollywood now. What's the last movie that was, like.

[Tom Segura]

Important global impact that you could make.

[Jimmy Carr]

A joke about on stage?

[Tom Segura]

And everybody.

[Jimmy Carr]

Everyone gets the joke because not everyone needs to have seen the sixth Sense. But everyone got that that's what the movie was. I know, the Matrix, Fight Club, whatever those things were that people just went, yeah, that's when we talk about language.

[Tom Segura]

A lot, you know, like, like about comedy movies. It's like when you want to say a reference that everybody goes like, yeah. You realize that you're like the Hangover. And then you're like, oh, that's like 20 years old now. You know what I mean? Like, what's the, what's the last comedy movie that if you say it and you go like everybody, like you go, borat. Everyone's like, oh, yeah, yeah. And you're like, yes. 20 years old. Like, it's not, it's not a, a recent thing.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, I wonder if it's that our technology has changed that we're not going to the movies anymore, to the cinema. That's, you know, it's tailing off. You know, the Oscars is becoming less relevant.

[Tom Segura]

And if you see the numbers on it, like.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, what's, what's becoming more relevant? So the idea that the phone is the technology now, so people are consuming things on the phone. So actually if you put up crowd work all the time, it suits people.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Because it's little bite sized chunks. It's not as good as the real experience. Like coming out, seeing a comic live. There's nothing like that.

[Tom Segura]

Nothing like it.

[Jimmy Carr]

You don't laugh in the same way you laugh. I think someone, someone sent me the stats. It was like 30 times more at the same stimulus when you're in a crowd. Because it's like when you're performing.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

Obviously the illusion is, I'm on stage in Dallas last night.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And had great fun. And the illusion is. Oh, he performed on stage.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

No, 1600 people performed right in the audience.

[Tom Segura]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

But if you go. I suppose it's more obvious with music, but if you go and see like Taylor Swift or, or Oasis or whatever your thing is, and you see the people in the crowd singing along and like Bruce Springsteen at the top of the show goes, how you doing? Everyone goes, yeah, yeah, try that in Starbucks. See how far you go. You'd be escorted from the building.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's all performative.

[Tom Segura]

It's all performative and people love play.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

That's the thing that we're into. The things missing from our lives is play. Think about anything anyone gives a fuck about. It's play. Sports playing.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Comedies playing, movies. We're watching a play. It's all we want. More play in our lives. You think about what a podcast is. It's play.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's. It's kind of a conversation. We don't know where it's going. It's in good faith. We're just seeing what happens.

[Tom Segura]

That's. It's a great.

[Jimmy Carr]

Is everything.

[Tom Segura]

It's a good point. And it's like. And it's the thing that you realize so many people. So many people are missing from their lives, you know, is like, a lot of people don't remember to play. In other words, they go like, oh, yeah, I don't go to shows and I don't want. And you're like, yeah, you're missing, like, fun. You don't have any fun anymore. And then, like, last night I was on stage in Florida and, you know, I talked to some people afterwards, and they're like, this is my first. My first comedy show I've ever been to. And I was like, what do you. You know, what do you think? They're like, it's so. Like, I've watched so many specials. And I was like, yeah, but you can't duplicate the energy. Right? Like, being a part of. Of the crowd and, like, feeling the energy.

[Jimmy Carr]

This is the. The issue with the world, I think, right now. Not to be all serious, but I think it's the. The issue is we're giving up everything for cheap dopamine.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, young men are looking at porn. And I'm not, like, puritanical. I'm not saying ban porn. We shouldn't be looking at porn. I'm saying, no, no, go and get your dick wet.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

You've got to go and do it in real life.

[Tom Segura]

That's the better.

[Jimmy Carr]

You know, it's way better. Well, that thing of, like, the message can't be don't look a porn. It's like, no, no, you have to go and meet a girl.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

And take a chance and make a porn with her. Yeah. Yeah. Make your own.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, that's kind of the thing, isn't it?

[Tom Segura]

I mean, this is the thing. And as somebody who, like, I remember being in my 20s and 30s, especially, like, early on when you move to a new city and you're. You're feeling isolated and you don't know people and it coincides. You're like, if you. When you look back, especially when you can see things clearly, you're like, oh, yeah, I'm sitting in a room watching porn and thinking that I'm participating in life. Right. Like, you're just. Like, I'm just in a room looking back on It. You're like, oh, yeah. I was like, trying to fill a gap.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

A hole that is not being.

[Jimmy Carr]

Trying to fill a hole.

[Tom Segura]

Quite literally trying to fill like six holes. But you realize too that it's a cheap search for dopamine and that you can see how somebody could easily fall into this gap.

[Jimmy Carr]

What are things that are. They're proxies. So, like porn is a proxy for real intimacy and sex, booze and drugs are a proxy for fun. It's a kind of a fast way to get there.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

You know, and it helps. And I'm not, you know, again, not puritanical. I'm saying, great.

[Tom Segura]

We're not. We're not.

[Jimmy Carr]

But make sure you do something.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

Do something fun.

[Jimmy Carr]

But make sure you're doing something, you know, fun. And it's like video games. For me. It's like the tragedy of video games is the young men that play them. Like there's levels and a big boss at the end.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it's a proxy for the career they're not having.

[Tom Segura]

God damn.

[Jimmy Carr]

They need to go out and live their life, go and have the adventure. And I do think it's easy for us. We're a couple of old men.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

And somehow we. We got dealt the cards. Like the luck. We don't factor in the luck.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

The luck is big because we came along at a time when comedy was a thing. If we'd been around in the 1919s, comedy was not a thing. Like, thanks to the hard work of Prior and George Carlin, we get to be in a world where it's all the clubs were there, the infrastructure was there, the community was there. Like, people think they're individuals. No one.

[Guest/Producer]

Our, our.

[Jimmy Carr]

Our sort of whole identities are dispersed. Why we've got a mental health crisis because people think they can solve their problems internally. I always not done like that. It's done with other people.

[Tom Segura]

It's done with. You have to.

[Jimmy Carr]

You need a village.

[Tom Segura]

The other epidemic that is like huge, huge, huge. That I become more aware of as I've gotten older is the epidemic of loneliness. Meaning there's so many people that you don't like. You take for granted sometimes that you have a family, you know, a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, friends. And then you realize there are a lot of people that don't have any of that. Like, they really don't. They live in their. The isolation of their life. They don't interact with a lot of people. They don't have a lot of friends, they don't have a romantic Partner.

[Jimmy Carr]

They. That's. I suppose it's that thing of like, you know, it's. It's hard choices now, easy life later. Those things are very difficult to put together.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And then obviously you get the benefits downstream.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

So you get that thing of like, the good stuff is like, you have to put the energy in.

[Guest/Producer]

Like.

[Jimmy Carr]

Why do people get drunk in like. Like. Like soldiers. Why do soldiers get drunk? Oh, well, it's a bonding experience. Right. It's kind of obvious. It's not. It's the hangover. The reason guys get absolutely blitzed before going into battle is not to get drunk together, not to be drunk. It's not for the night out. It's the hangover. The hangover is the bonding. The next morning. Oh, man. What do we do last night? What do we have? I feel terrible. That thing. That's.

[Tom Segura]

That's the bonding.

[Jimmy Carr]

That's the bonding. Going through tough times together and st. Together. And now we kind of live in a world where there's. We've got too many options.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

You can't stay in a relationship because people are on tender. They've got other options.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

Constant. It kind of gets back to that. No, there's a book from like the 80s that this guy Neil Postman wrote called Amusing Ourselves to Death, where it's kind of like a media studies book kind of thing. But he basically talks about how it's not. It's not Orwellian. It's not like our power will not be taken from some overlord in charge, some fascistic leader. Our power will be taken. We'll give it away for cheap dopamine. Yeah, we'll give it away for swipes on Tick Tock, you know, and all that stuff can be great. But it's the. It's the.

[Tom Segura]

It's a quick fix, though.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. And it's. And the. It's often the. It's. The dosage is the poison.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

It's like.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's just 28 hours of tick Tock is a lot.

[Tom Segura]

It's too much. Well, that goes back to the video game thing because I don't like to, like. There's this thing where, you know, we. A lot of people demonize or like, criticize gamers, Right. They'll just be like, oh, you're in your basement playing games. And like, you know, these games are incredible and the people that are skilled at them are very skilled. The only thing that I find for like your average person like myself and gaming is like, if you don't have control over the Time you would put into it. Like, you know, if you commit too much of your time, then it's this portal into too much escape.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think, listen, we can't be too down on gamers because it's. It's the variable reward system that they use to make those games brilliant.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And they are brilliant.

[Tom Segura]

They're brilliant.

[Jimmy Carr]

And you go, it's the same as the casinos.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

100.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it's the same engineers. Same thing we do with comedy.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's a variable rewards mechanism. It's kind of what jokes are.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Because you go, what are jokes? Well, it's. It's taking people to a surprising yet inevitable conclusion. Like that story. It's like landing that plane. It's like this surprising, but it was absolutely inevitable.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that's true. That there's a lot of people, I realize that in this moment that are adjusting their dials, looking at their screens, and they're like, is that Bert? So we should make it clear that you are not Bert Kreischer.

[Jimmy Carr]

Oh, yes. No, I.

[Tom Segura]

Right, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

No, we probably should say yeah, because there's.

[Tom Segura]

People are like, wow.

[Jimmy Carr]

Bert's like, we get. We get a lot of people come and see me and they go, wait, this isn't why he's got his shirt on.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. He's like, he's dressed nice.

[Jimmy Carr]

Lost is enough.

[Tom Segura]

Stressed. He's lost weight. He's really put together.

[Jimmy Carr]

This is a good time to tell people he's died.

[Tom Segura]

This is. This is Jimmy Carr. This is not Bert. And just so that people are aware, Jimmy, how.

[Jimmy Carr]

How will he die? If we made our predictions now, I'm gonna go, eaten by a shark. I'm gonna go, dude, that.

[Tom Segura]

He would be so much happier if that were his.

[Jimmy Carr]

I. I slightly think that should be. This is.

[Tom Segura]

This is some type of action adventure.

[Jimmy Carr]

If you. If you're going to die, right. If you're. If you're absolutely committed, which he will. Unaliving yourself. I think shark infested water is the way to go, because basically everything else you've done in your life is like a. Is a footnote to you only got eaten by a shark.

[Tom Segura]

And that would be the. It's such a Bert story too. Like, Bert lives in a fantastical. You know, like.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

He's always. It's always extremes and crazy shit. Like, he lives.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's almost like he's on a train in Russia. Yeah. It's with a bag of cocaine and a grizzly pants.

[Tom Segura]

It's all this almost like fantasy. Right. So it's like, if he died, like, oh, heart attack. Which you're like, yeah, of course. It's such like a. It's so boring.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

It feels like I would love it and be like, oh, guess what? He jumped out of plane, no parachute. You're like, that sounds right. You know, like that kind.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like something eaten by a shark. I think if.

[Guest/Producer]

If.

[Jimmy Carr]

And this is. Obviously, this is a big stretch. I'm not criticizing your security services in America, but I think if Epstein had been thrown to sharks.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Rather than just killed in prison.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think that would. I think everyone. No one be talking about the island. People go, you heard he got eaten by sharks.

[Tom Segura]

Sharks. They're so insane.

[Jimmy Carr]

Insane grizzly. They got it on film.

[Tom Segura]

It's crazy. It is crazy. But so people know, Jimmy is on his Laughs Funny tour throughout the us, uk, Europe. Right now you're going to Australia, New Zealand in early 26. You can get tickets@jimmy Carr.com. so make sure you go see.

[Jimmy Carr]

Don't feel you have to.

[Tom Segura]

Well, you don't.

[Jimmy Carr]

You've got other stuff on.

[Tom Segura]

There's a lot of stuff you can but do.

[Jimmy Carr]

Go and get tickets for something.

[Tom Segura]

Go to something.

[Jimmy Carr]

Go to something. I always think that thing of, like, when you get your ticket, like, you kind of get the benefit twice.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like the. We. Jim Jeffries came over to London, so we went to see Oasis, right. We went to see the gig and we were. Like. When we got the. Like when the tickets came out and when we got them and when we got the passes and the, like, the whole thing was the. The high before, the high was so good of, like, right, what are we going to do? Where are we going to go? Yeah, we've got to be careful. We don't drink too much because we want to enjoy every moment of it. It was just. And, like, nothing will be that good again because it's what you put into it.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, exactly.

[Jimmy Carr]

Oasis aren't the greatest, but you kind of go, well, I've put 30 years into this band.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I know everything backwards. 90,000 people singing along. It was just.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

The energy.

[Jimmy Carr]

Next level.

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[Tom Segura]

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[Jimmy Carr]

It's not thousands of years. It's. It's actually. It's not for that long.

[Tom Segura]

Well, not for that long, but it's.

[Jimmy Carr]

Everything was like evolution of an arranged marriage. Which is. Which is the nice way of saying cousin marriage.

[Tom Segura]

That's true.

[Jimmy Carr]

It was the tribal thing of, like, keeping everyone together for years. And then we had this wonderful thing where we would meet someone and fall in love. I think the issue is. Now, the way I think about relationships is is it cornerstone or capstone relationships? So, cornerstone relationship. You meet someone in your 20s and you build a life together, and there's like a reservoir of goodwill and you kind of build a life together. And then there's capstone relationships where guys sort of do everything else and they just solve for career and money and hard charging. And then at the end they go, and I've got this girl who's super hot, just 20 years younger than me. Yeah, but you go. There's like a. Yeah. It's a different way of doing it.

[Tom Segura]

A different way of doing it. But I think that there's something to, like, you know, when in the old days, we'll call it. Which is just like 50 years ago or something. It's like you meet someone and you get to know them and then, you know, like, you actually take. As opposed to like, swipe. Swipe. Yes. No, but I went out with her and whatever. Like, that feels like, hey, maybe take some cues from that previous time if you're not finding success in your Swipe. Swipe.

[Guest/Producer]

Swipe.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, it seems. Isn't there some stat that the old people, now, our grandparents, are having more.

[Tom Segura]

Sex in retirement than the children in retirement communities. It's a big thing.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yes. Which is kind of. It's not the way it should be. Right. It's kind of.

[Tom Segura]

It feels strange that they're like, these are the highest std, like, numbers that we're seeing in any demographic is within retirement communities. Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. That's a bit of granny. So they're like, that can't be good, can it?

[Tom Segura]

We're on our way out and we're trying to fuck.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Gils.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, dude, I have a friend that's into that and I. We all were like laughing at first and then we're like, what's up? Like, what's wrong with you?

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, he's like, well, I guess we don't choose.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, it's your wiring. Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's a weird thing with like, often think of that with like a sense of humor or like, like your sense of humor is very much like your taste in food or your sexual preferences. Like, some people like it spicy.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And my audience is self selecting, so people that come and see me, they like the spicy comedy.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And some people like, like plain stuff.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And that's absolutely valid.

[Tom Segura]

I agree.

[Jimmy Carr]

But like, we see it on certain things. You go, oh, you don't like that food. You do like that food. Well, like, no one's like, cross. Oh, you don't like Indian foods? Too spicy for you. Oh, you're an idiot. You go, well, that's fine. But with comedy, if someone doesn't like that comedian, you go, you're an idiot.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

No, it's just what you like.

[Tom Segura]

It's just what you like. I agree. I agree that like, that's another thing. The older you get, you, I think you just feel like I used to be more critical of, I was annoyed.

[Jimmy Carr]

With stuff if I didn't like it.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

But this isn't for me.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Not everything's for you.

[Tom Segura]

Not everything's for you. It's just like when you go to the Cinema and there's 12 movies, you're like, yeah, that one's not for you. The one that you're like, I wouldn't want to see it. Like, don't go see it then. Go see the one that's for you. Yeah, you don't have to shit on.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think having kids really kind of changes that because you go, you obviously watch a lot of kids stuff, of course. And then you. And then you find yourself going, that's a good one. Yeah, that's a good one. I mean, I wouldn't watch it on my own, but that was a good one.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah. Because then you realize you're like, this is. This was done by high level people where they're entertaining children and adults at the same time. Like, some of it is so well crafted. You're like, oh, they got both jokes in there. They got the one for the kid.

[Jimmy Carr]

That picks up stuff as well, where they go, just go, oh, this is just perfect.

[Tom Segura]

That's really, really well done. Yeah, absolutely. So how long are you in the States, right? Now for.

[Jimmy Carr]

I got like three. Three blocks. So we've got little kids. I like 12 days away at a time. So just basically hard charge and do like two shows in a different city every night is kind of the idea. And just kind of. I do that, but I mean, I'm always on tour.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I kind of love it. I think that thing about going. It's not like at the end of the tour, the beginning of the tour, it's just like I'm always doing shows.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And I kind of love it. I think it is that thing where you go, it's nice to be good at something. It's nice to kind of travel around.

[Tom Segura]

You have a lane. You're like, I get to do this. It's kind of great.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, that's very. It's very lucky as well. It feels like there's a. You know, comedy's having a bit of a moment. I think culturally, it feels like it's. It's maybe having the moment that movies had in the 70s.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Or that, you know, that music had, you know, that thing of, like, it's the center of the culture and it feels quite. You know, there's a lot of controversy around comic comedians because they're saying interesting things.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that's true. I always think about the luck, too, by the way, that you were mentioning. Because one of the things I tell people is I'm like, you know, if I was the same guy and the same age and this were just forget 50 years ago, if this was like 2001 and I. And I was like 35, like, when my first special came out, I go, like, the thing that would have happened is, like, best case scenario, like, maybe I could fill up a club. You know, just, just, just the times.

[Jimmy Carr]

I'm saying, because Don Rickles never played Narina.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

Like, I mean, also the only. Like, to be an arena act 25 plus years ago, you'd have to be a global household name. Like, you'd have to be. It was so.

[Jimmy Carr]

It was Eddie Murphy, Robin Williams. That was maybe. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Dice, when he. When he did it was like. Like everybody knew who that was.

[Jimmy Carr]

But Dice did it in America. He did. Some people just stay in America because why would you not? I mean, it's so huge.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

You can just do the circuit here forever and never wander out.

[Tom Segura]

That's true. But, like, I have a total awareness, I'm saying, of the fact that streaming and the Internet change that space where you're like, oh. I'm also just lucky that when this came out, this Medium was available. Like, it wasn't available.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's weird how I'd really noticed it earlier this year with, like, White Lotus came out and everyone was talking about the same TV show. And I thought, are we. Am I a kid again? It felt like there was one thing on tv, right? Like, it used to, like when there was five channels, when there was three channels, whatever it was, and everyone kind of watched the same thing.

[Tom Segura]

That's true.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it feels like we're getting back to that now.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, everyone's kind of consolidating the thing about movies, too. I don't know if you've ever done this where you go on, like.

[Guest/Producer]

The.

[Tom Segura]

Apple, you know, like iTunes movies, and you're like, what's. What are the top 10 or 20 trending movies? And now you'll go through them and you'll see movie stars. Like, it'll be like, Keanu Reeves. And you're like, this is a Keanu Reeves movie. And then you're like, I've never heard of this movie. I don't know what this is. How did this come out? And it's a shift from not that long ago when if somebody of his stature was in a movie, there would. It would always be a theatrical release, obviously. And you would. There's no way. You wouldn't have. You would have a ref. You'd be like, oh, yeah, I saw the billboard and the trailer of this movie because it's a huge movie star and there's a lot of money behind it. And now there's like. You'll see movie stars in these things. And you're like, I've never. This came out this year. And then it's like straight to a rental thing. Like, that's a different path than what we had. And there's a bunch of those now because now that it just. They go different places.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, there's a. There's a. There's obviously, there's a theory. There's a theory that we're kind of at the end of a cultural sort of time. So there's a. There's a guy called Neil Howe. He's the guy that came up with the term millennium millennial. So he's like a demographer guy.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And he thinks that. That, like, history sort of rolls certainly America in 80 to 100 year blocks.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

So you basically have. So 2008 was 1929, that financial crash. And that's the beginning of what he calls the fourth turning. It's kind of the end of a period of history. So you Go through this incredibly sort of disruptive period where there's a war or cataclysmic events and you reinvent the institutions, and then you kind of. There's a rebirth. So you go. If you think back to, like, the end of the last fourth turning was like, 1945. 46.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

And then we don't have any culture from before that. Nothing makes sense to us. Before Elvis.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And even Elvis now is kind of fading from view.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, as the kind of the foundation myth of our society is kind of fading away. World War II, that foundation myth is kind of fading. So you go, so we're kind of at the end of a cultural thing, and you sort of.

[Tom Segura]

And then it rents.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

What is. What's, like, the current point of view of. From Brits of, like, what the US Is right now?

[Jimmy Carr]

You know, I mean, I. I don't think there's one view anymore.

[Tom Segura]

It's like there's multiple views.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, people are kind of siloed, I think. People are sort of.

[Guest/Producer]

It's.

[Jimmy Carr]

I don't know. There's a lot of talk of left and right, and I don't think that makes any sense to me. I think it's about kind of authoritarian and freedom, basically. It's like that idea of going, some people want to have a conversation, and some people do not want there to be a conversation.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it's that weird thing of, like, going, you know, what's. I mean, it could have gone another way. You're often. Often thinking about the kind of counterfactuals. So it's the end of the. An era, I guess.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Feels like it's the end of something.

[Tom Segura]

If you've sensed the authoritarian shift.

[Jimmy Carr]

Not even the authoritarian shift. It's the. It's the end of. So, sorry, it's too boring for the podcast. It's like Pax Americana, Right. So there was a thing called Pax Americana, like Pax Romana, Pax Britannia, where basically there was a unipolar world with one massive power. The Romans. It was the British, it was the Americans, and it was the Americans. For the longest time, from 1945 until the fall of the Berlin Wall, America just ruled the seas. The American Navy gave us globalization. They let everything happen. Those brave men made everything possible that we appreciate in the world today. And then since 1989 or 91, wherever you want to draw the line, the American laby has shrunk every year because it didn't have a big enemy to fight. It was just this unipolar world kind of go, okay, well those guys are fading and our empire's getting stronger and it's all just sort of fracturing apart. Now that globalization thing is just like it's fracturing and we're kind of witnessing the end of that. So some people think, okay, so it's because Donald Trump was elected, so it's, it's contingent on that. And I don't think that's the case. I think it's convergent. I think he happens to be. But this is, this is the force of history happening. It doesn't matter who's elected. It's still going to be this guy.

[Tom Segura]

It's still going to be that. Yeah, I agree.

[Jimmy Carr]

Might be too boring.

[Tom Segura]

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[Jimmy Carr]

Out for yourself to look like this. Yeah, I do. I do. What do we do? I do. I listen to too many podcasts, so obviously I do a bit of AG1. You have to do that. There's a certain level of podcast where you go, well, they just. If you listen to a certain amount, they send you AG1 element.

[Tom Segura]

Are British comics as into cold plunges and peptides?

[Jimmy Carr]

As Americans, I'm massively into cold plungers.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

I saw. On a cold plunge every day I do the.

[Tom Segura]

That thing you do.

[Jimmy Carr]

And there's a weird thing of, like, I did it the first time and kind of went, this is some bullshit.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I've got baby dick from the cold plunge. I hate this.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

That's how you can tell who's got a real cock on them, too. If they pop out of the cold plunge and you see weight, you're like, this guy's got a dick.

[Jimmy Carr]

This is. That's something. Yeah, yeah, the. That. That thing of, like. Yeah, it is good. It's a really. It seems to work. And I don't know about the. That thing of, like, you I'm very aware of, like, what's a fad and what's not a fad, but. But you kind of go. When you go to. I did a bunch in, like, Norway and Denmark when I tour over there.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And you're, like, doing, like, cold plunges where you actually jump in the Baltic Sea.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Out of the sauna.

[Tom Segura]

It's like, this is the best, though.

[Jimmy Carr]

And then for the next six hours, you're kind of on a high, and.

[Tom Segura]

Then you're like, these motherfuckers been doing this for, like, a thousand years. Like, this. This works.

[Jimmy Carr]

I kind of think it's meditation, but it's like a physical version of meditation. You could be chatting to someone over, but your body is in, like, in, like a. So it's Like a workout for your heart. Like every blood vessel opens, everything tightens. It's good for you.

[Tom Segura]

You prioritize. Sleep.

[Jimmy Carr]

I sleep. I sleep pretty well. You sleep with little kids or whatever, but yeah, I sleep. Not bad.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, not bad.

[Tom Segura]

And then because, I mean, you're like, it's.

[Jimmy Carr]

The booze thing is hard because you're on the road. It's always tempting as a little treat.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Apparently people started drinking because it was like the, it was the sugar at the end of the day.

[Tom Segura]

Just a little treat.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And that thing of like going, it's hard sometimes not to have a little drink after a show. But it's, it's that classic thing of like, you're borrowing happiness from tomorrow.

[Guest/Producer]

Great.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like our drink is okay, but if you have several.

[Tom Segura]

Are you into edibles or anything like that?

[Jimmy Carr]

No, not my, not my jam. You kind of can't get them in the uk. It's not. Well, I mean you can, but it's.

[Tom Segura]

It'S a whole thing.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, it would be, it would be illegal and it would be, you know. So if it's illegal then nationwide. No, but it would be the. It's. I think that thing about with marijuana. I've got quite strong views on marijuana, which I think are controversial.

[Guest/Producer]

You do?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. So here's the thing. I think it's a performance inhibiting drug. So I see a lot of young men playing video games, smoking weed, kind of doing nothing with their lives, but it doesn't matter because they're just in a kind of little fugue state. Okay. I don't like seeing that. I'd rather they were out doing something. I'd rather they were out drinking, frankly. I would say the risk to your liver is as nothing compared to the risk of social isolation. Get out there, have a few drinks.

[Tom Segura]

But some people can do that, socialize on with weed. Like a lot of people are feel social on it, like.

[Jimmy Carr]

But it isn't classically a social drug. So I think it should be illegal for the under 30s, legal between 30 and 50. You can make a decision. And then over 50, mandatory.

[Tom Segura]

That was an unexpected turn.

[Jimmy Carr]

But I think a lot of dudes of like 50 and above, like the CEOs, that kind of class of people, they need to chill the fuck out.

[Guest/Producer]

They do.

[Jimmy Carr]

Get out the way, let the young people have a go.

[Tom Segura]

I'm much better in social situations with a light dose. Really, that just. I'm talking about socializing.

[Jimmy Carr]

But the dose thing is everything.

[Tom Segura]

For me, the dose is everything.

[Jimmy Carr]

Because when it's illegal like marijuana isn't what it was when I was a kid. When I was a kid, it was like, it was weed.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And now it's this incredibly kind of powerful kind of skunk. Like it's, it's too powerful for me to go anywhere near. And the dosage is not clear because it's, it's illegal. So everyone's like the dosage, like whoever figured out what's one unit of alcohol, that's a genius move. We sort of need the same thing for marijuana. Like, they like the proper dosage so that you can, it's just universal. You only get that when it becomes legalized.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Tom Segura]

I, I've had like an interesting relationship with weed for most of my life, I think, where I didn't do it for like when I started to do a little bit in high school, right. And then kind of stopped. And in college I was smoking a lot of weed. A lot. And then I got to LA right after and it was heavy, heavy use. Like, like, not that I was throughout the day doing it like every evening.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

It was like, like a, the nighttime treat.

[Jimmy Carr]

But you never quite give yourself time to recover fully from that.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, well, I, I, what I realized was that like we were doing, you know, we're doing like massive bong rips, like right before you go to bed. So you're like super high, right? And then you, you know, you feel like, oh, I'm sleeping so much deeper. But then at my, the next day I would be like dragging. And especially if I had something to do, obviously, right. Like I have to go somewhere. So I would like kind of reduce, reduce what I was doing because I had an awareness of it. And then I just wasn't smoking anymore. Just like completely. Not like I'm anti this. I'm like, oh, I'm more productive right this way. Then anytime I would introduce it, it would be too much. So I would get like anxiety and paranoia. I'm like, this isn't, this isn't fun for me. Like, I'm not enjoying this.

[Jimmy Carr]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

And then years would kind of go by and then I guess you would call it, it's all related to like the dosage or when I was introduced to low dose edibles, it was like the kind of like the nice feeling of like, oh, there's like a little something here. Like, like having a drink and you go have a little buzz. But not like I'm fucking blitzed.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. I mean, that's kind of my point on the. Yeah, it's Half a joke, but half or so. I think actually older guys, like, it seems appropriate, the victory lap. You made it.

[Tom Segura]

You made it.

[Jimmy Carr]

You've done your thing.

[Guest/Producer]

Okay.

[Tom Segura]

Just.

[Jimmy Carr]

You need to chill out.

[Tom Segura]

This will help you chill out, have a laugh.

[Jimmy Carr]

But, like, in your 20s, I don't know if you need that.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that's. That's a good point. I haven't really thought of it. Like, I think.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, I think that thing about everyone's got a couple of lost years to, like. I didn't drink when I started doing comedy. I gave up drinking for, I think it was like 12 years maybe.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I went fully sort of t. Total because I kind of suddenly I was like, mid-20s, but I felt so old, and I suddenly felt like, this world's incredible. Maybe I could stay here. Maybe they'll let me stay here. And it was like. It was probably 10 years before I went. I. I think I do this for a living now.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think this isn't just a phase. I think I'm okay. I think I've established something. I think I'm going to be all right. Because it wasn't like there wasn't really the career ladder that there is now in terms of people can see, oh, I'll follow that path and I'll do that.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

It was a bit more kind of. We were kind of walking into A. In 2001, it was like. It was kind of walking into a graveyard.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

There wasn't a lot going on. People weren't touring in the same way.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that's 100% true. I also remember that, like, I. I listened to some. I'm glad I did. The very first time I did stand up, I was in a panic.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

I was like, I can't. Like, I signed up for this thing. What the fuck am I doing?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And I. There was a bar here, and then you had to go around to this thing. It wasn't a comedy club. It was like. It was a bar that was having comedy night. And I was. Once I was in there because I had prepared, or I thought I'd prepared. And I'm standing there and I'm listening to the person on stage. I was like. And I pounded a beer.

[Guest/Producer]

Right. Right.

[Tom Segura]

And then I got a second one and I pounded that one because I was, like, really nervous.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And I went up there and it was, you know, it was fine. It wasn't great. It wasn't. It was. It was fine. But I remember talking to someone, not that night, but shortly thereafter, where they were like, make sure you don't get into drinking before your sets because you're, it's going to become like a crutch for you where you're, you'll be like, oh, if I have a set, I have to have drinks. And then you'll probably have to have more drinks. And for some reason it just, it's.

[Jimmy Carr]

Great advice to get early on.

[Tom Segura]

It clocked with me and I, I've never performed since then.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

With a drink in me. I always have a drink. If I want a drink, I have it after a set. Never before.

[Jimmy Carr]

There's a weird. I, I don't know. I mean, I, I slightly, it kind of makes me a bit melancholic because I think back to Edinburgh, the festival, and the guys that you haven't heard of, that you'll never hear of that had such fun. Yeah, they had more fun than I had.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

But they didn't, they kind of, the comedy was like a little bit of it. It wasn't the whole thing.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

It was like, oh, I'm doing comedy. But it kind of facilitates my incredible capacity for drugs and alcohol.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Okay, great. But it's like.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, well, we all know so many names of like, you're like, this person was outrageously funny.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, it's, it's the reason Bert died.

[Tom Segura]

That is my bird's day.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

This is the memorial show. We should probably talk about him more, but. Nah, it's fine.

[Tom Segura]

I miss you, Bert.

[Jimmy Carr]

Still moving on.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

So are you in the middle of a tour at the moment? Are you?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I'm so, I, I, I've been on, I've been on this tour for almost two years and I like that.

[Jimmy Carr]

I like touring for like, mine, mine's about a three year.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Thing. But I like that fact that you get to know it really well. So it becomes less about the memory trick of knowing what the jokes are and more about. Okay. I nailed that. I took them with me on that joke. And then, and then you're kind of, you're adding bits all the time, like little. It's okay. Perform like that. And the gap needs to be a bit longer there or.

[Tom Segura]

And now I'm in that, that part where. I love this part where I'm going to shoot in November and you can't manufacture the pressure and of an upcoming shoot.

[Jimmy Carr]

The last one in, was it at Phoenix.

[Tom Segura]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

I played that room. I was, I played that. I saw your special and I went, I'm gonna play that room.

[Tom Segura]

It's great.

[Jimmy Carr]

I'm gonna Book it. So it's like in the round.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Celebrity theater.

[Jimmy Carr]

Because whenever I do arenas, I always play them in the round.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it's kind of a trick I got from. I played a gig with Chappelle in Australia. We did arena in the round. I went, oh, no one's got a bad seat.

[Tom Segura]

No one's got a bad.

[Jimmy Carr]

And you kind of. You turn. But if you put screens above, you just sort of turn slowly and everyone kind of feels like the thing. We've got great seats.

[Tom Segura]

Yes, absolutely. The thing that I love about being in the round, too, is that I'm generally a pretty stationary guy, you know, like, yeah, I'm not going to do a lot. A lot of movement, but when I work the round, it just inherently makes you do a. Like a continuous movement, and it adds something actually, like, you kind of don't realize it, but it's adding a little bit of volume to your performance because you keep moving around.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And you become a little more compelling to watch. Right. Because you. You have movement to you. It's more compelling. And then you can. And then when you stop, it's actually more dramatic because you're. It's not a. It's not. You're not just standing still like you might in a theater where, you know, it's like.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's for. It's the.

[Tom Segura]

It's for. Is. There's an effect that comes from it. So I. I love that venue. The celebrity theater in Phoenix is. Is fantastic.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's pretty special. Where are you typing the new one? Where you go?

[Tom Segura]

The new one I'm doing at the Riverside in Milwaukee.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it's a cool town to play, though. Like a really good. I don't know, there's something about those kind of blue.

[Tom Segura]

People always ask. They're like, well, how do you pick these cities? I go, you pick the city based on your past experiences. So I go, I've had good shows in Milwaukee. I'm gonna do it in Milwaukee. But what I love about the tour right now is that because I know I'm shooting, I've noticed how much more laser focused I am on the set. You know what I mean? So, like, this past weekend, doing shows, I finally. I was, like, looking at my normal set and I was like, like, crossing off things where I'm like, that's just a gratuitous nonsense. Like, that's not helping the set.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, that's. To the edit.

[Tom Segura]

I cut it, you know, in real time. And I was like, oh, this made the set better. And then I moved. Like, you start to go, like, oh. I want to actually really dial it in. Adding tags, jokes, and I feel like even though you're doing that all the time, when you know there's a ticking clock, it just happens at a. More.

[Jimmy Carr]

How many of you tape for the special?

[Tom Segura]

We're gonna tape three shows.

[Jimmy Carr]

Okay. Okay, great. So you kind of.

[Tom Segura]

The pressure's off one Friday to Saturday.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, Perfect.

[Guest/Producer]

Be. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Be fun.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's a fun thing to do. It's a really. Kind of.

[Tom Segura]

It is fun, and I think I'm enjoying it more now than I ever have before.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. I mean, pressure is a privilege.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Some people don't get to be pressured at work. They don't get to have that thing. And you go, it's absolutely a privilege.

[Guest/Producer]

It is.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think people, like. I don't know. I think people code stuff wrong in life generally. Like, pressure. Great. Stress is great.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, the. The idea of, like, people talk about problems, and you go, a problem just means something needs your attention.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, you either have a problem or you're bored. And boredom, I think, is wrongly coded. I think boredom is just unappreciated serenity.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

There's monks in a. In a. In a. You know, up a mountain in Tibet, trying to get to where I'm getting to. On. In an airport lounge.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Just app Thinking about nothing.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. I.

[Tom Segura]

You know, I have two young kids, and all the time when they're like, I'm bored, I go, good.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Like, what do you mean? I go, figure it out. Do something. And they're like, what? I go, I don't know, man. Just be bored. Figure some out.

[Jimmy Carr]

I used to, like, write most of my material driving. Because you were kind of busy doing something, but your mind was like. So I'd like. I turn off the radio because it's just a distraction. I just sort of go, okay, think about stuff. Think about me. Because a lot of it's kind of wordplay and stuff, so just let things kind of. And let things just occur to you.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Just funny little thoughts and let them. I think a lot of creativity comes from boredom. I think that overstimulation.

[Tom Segura]

Were you good at retaining it? Like, would you just retain it if you came up with it?

[Jimmy Carr]

Would you have? Yeah, I've got a pretty good. I've got, like. It's not a photographic memory, but, like, I'll remember. If I listen to something or if I say something, I'll remember it, like, pretty much verbatim.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Even years later, I remember where I was when I said it.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I'm like that too. I can read. I have really good recall for specific conversations. Like, I'll be like, this is where we were. You said this, I said this. You said this. You know, like, yeah, if I can.

[Jimmy Carr]

Listen to a audiobook, I'll remember where I was when I listened to it. Yeah, the whole thing, pretty much. Yeah, it's. It's a useful. But that thing of, like, boredom as a. It's like, it's seen as being the worst. And you go, no, no, it's. It's okay to be bored. Just sit with yourself. It's okay. I mean, the phone has kind of ruined that for us.

[Tom Segura]

Ruined it. And I think it's a bigger ruiner for a young kid now because they don't, like, we tell them, like, yeah, we don't have any of this shit, you know, we just take a stick and fucking throw it. Like, like, you know, like, you should figure out something to do. You can figure it. And then, of course they do. They do. They end up figuring out some, you know. Yeah, they build a fortress in the living room. And you're like, yeah, this is what. Like you made something happen. You did something. You know, you don't have to just be like, give me some stimulation from the phone right now.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, it seems to be that thing of the. What's that? Jonathan Haidt book. He's the guy that did the Cuddling of the American Mind and then he dug the Anxious Generation. Very good on like, you know, kids can't have phones. It's weird how. But he also sort of makes the concession that, like, stories are very good for kids. Whether it's a, you know, it could be a book, but it could be like a 25 minute, like, morality tale. Good TV show is. That's pretty good for kids.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, that's good.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's the swiping, it's the just the instant, instant, instant stuff.

[Tom Segura]

It's just.

[Jimmy Carr]

Just kills them.

[Tom Segura]

It kills them. I agree.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's too much.

[Tom Segura]

I wanted to add because I just had this conversation with someone asked me the other day. I was like, oh, this is a good one. What is the. Have you ever had. What's the biggest surprise person, celebrity or whomever that you came to a show and you're like, whoa, really? Because I know that you've had people pop into shows that you're like, you're here.

[Jimmy Carr]

I remember Stephen Hawking coming in Cambridge.

[Tom Segura]

That's a crazy one.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, he's like, Was an old friend of mine.

[Tom Segura]

And wait, he was an old friend of yours?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, he's a friend of mine. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

So, okay, so when he came, it was a friend showing up or was it somebody just being.

[Jimmy Carr]

No, well, he was like. He was a friend showing up. So that was quite a lot of like organizing to get him anywhere because he's, you know, he's, he's ever so slightly tetraplegic.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

He just had one cheek muscle at the time.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I remember him coming to the show and then doing like a barrage of jokes about him and then the people around him just going, does he not know he's here?

[Tom Segura]

And he loved it.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, he's fine.

[Tom Segura]

How was Stephen Hawking like? I feel like, I don't know, it.

[Jimmy Carr]

Was like a fun. He was a fun hang. Like it was a weird thing where obviously if you know someone, if you have people that are severely disabled in your life, if they're tetraplegic, you have to just be on send because you're not going to get any. There's no waiting for an answer. Like people waiting for a yes. It's going to take him 20 minutes to fucking do. Just fucking tell him some interesting stories. He'll maybe send you an email in a few weeks.

[Guest/Producer]

Really?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. So that thing of like being on send.

[Tom Segura]

But it was, was it a surprise he came. Were you like, oh, no, I kind of.

[Jimmy Carr]

On the day it was like, oh, I went to see him for teeny one. You know, he's. People want. Can he come to the show?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Great.

[Tom Segura]

That's pretty good.

[Jimmy Carr]

That was fun. That's a fun. Like Pablo. Who else came? Like, who's the wrestler guy? John Senna.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

John Cena.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, John Cena. I was doing a gig in Melbourne, Australia and about halfway through the gig and I'm looking at a guy in the third row going, I recognize him. Suited and booted.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Sitting with a stunning looking lady and just like clearly enjoying the show. But recognize him.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I know that guy that looks just like that wrestler fella.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

Who's a movie star. It looks just like him. And then. So finish the gig, go backstage, don't think anything of it. And then like the tour manager comes and goes. There's a guy wants to come and say hello. He's a wrestler, I think. And then he sort of came back, but he just bought a ticket. He was in town filming something. That's such a gentleman. It's like such a men she move, I think.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I, I saw him at a Restaurant in la. Same thing. Like custom suit.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then you see the back like this. Jesus Christ.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

What is that?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I was watching a show, James Gunn was just here and there's a show that called Peacemaker on HBO Max right now. Cena's amazing in it. He's so good in it. Like, really funny and. Yeah, he's really good.

[Jimmy Carr]

Right. So who turned up at your shows? Who. Who, who was like a weird.

[Tom Segura]

Well, I was like. Because you start rack. Like it's a kind of like a pressure question. You're like, ah, yeah. Because you, you think back of all the years of like some. I was like, well, like the holy Brad Pitt. That's a holy one.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then Mike Tyson. I think those are like the, like, what the.

[Jimmy Carr]

I remember meeting Brad Pitt at something. I met him and Angelina Jolie.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And here's the thing, right. I've met a lot of very attractive women because there are lots of tens.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Wander around Austin on a Saturday night. There's a lot of incredibly attractive women. That's just a thing women do. It could be very attractive. But you meet a guy that good looking and he's like, what?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

What's going on there? Yeah. I've never seen this before.

[Tom Segura]

What's your life like? This seems pretty cool.

[Jimmy Carr]

This seems. Can I be handsome?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then like you stand the fun thing about like, he's a celebrity, so it goes to another level. But if you are with a dude who's that good looking, the fun thing to do is watch other people observe this person.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And you go like, oh, that's crazy. This is how you get looked at all the time. You know, because like people, you get look, you get used to like what normal eye contact looks like. And then you see people going like just.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think it's a weird thing. I think I know what it's like to be an incredibly attractive woman now.

[Guest/Producer]

You do.

[Jimmy Carr]

Okay, here's why you're.

[Tom Segura]

First of all, you're gorgeous, but keep going.

[Jimmy Carr]

But that thing of like you get asked, you have the same conversation. I think that thing of like, if I was a single guy, go, if it's an attractive woman, just a disruptive conversation, just something interesting and different is probably the way to start. Because they've had the same conversation a million times.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

In the same way as like, I'm not like, I love people coming up and saying hello, but it tends to be that it's one of three conversations that they're just going to hear every time.

[Tom Segura]

When you need something to shift and.

[Jimmy Carr]

Something kind of weird is like, is better.

[Tom Segura]

And imagine how many times I have I told a young dude this. Like, imagine how many times a beautiful woman has heard, you know, you're beautiful. Like how that won't stimulate anything inside of that person. It's the same thing. It's a hunt. She's heard it a thousand times. You got to say something different, man.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, it's weird actually, that thing of like. I was thinking about this recently about how in dating, like one night stands for dating, men will lower their standards for a one night stand. It's a one night stand. See, who cares?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

What do you mean? She's got one eye and a patch. Who cares? She's got three teeth. It's one night.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

So she seems nice.

[Tom Segura]

Whatever.

[Jimmy Carr]

She's like, whatever. We've had a few drinks, she seemed great.

[Tom Segura]

You stuff a trash bag. Who cares?

[Jimmy Carr]

Women, yeah. Raise their standards for the one night stand. A one night stand. You've got to be Brad Pitt for one night stand.

[Tom Segura]

Interesting.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's weird. We go in opposite directions. So it's like, why is it impressive that a guy has. Is sleeps with a girl on a Saturday night and it's not impressive that a girl sleeps with a guy on a Saturday night? Because it's impressive.

[Guest/Producer]

Right?

[Jimmy Carr]

The guy had a one night stand. That's a big deal, right? That's a big, That's a big deal. She raised her standards and he met that standard.

[Tom Segura]

That's, that's impressive.

[Jimmy Carr]

That's. Congratulations.

[Guest/Producer]

Good job.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well done. We're going to like, we're on the. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

We're going to take a moment and celebrate every man that's had a one night stand here.

[Jimmy Carr]

You're special gents.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, look, they're in the booth right now. They're thinking about their one night stands and they're like, wow.

[Jimmy Carr]

In the booth. They think, in the booth they're sitting there thinking, I wonder what it's like to touch a boob. That's what they're thinking. God love them. The, the, the.

[Tom Segura]

Were you a big one night stand guy?

[Jimmy Carr]

No, no, that's not my. Yeah, no, I mean I, I don't think I. No one is, no one is thinking of me in a. Yeah, I'm pretty. It's pretty.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

It's happened though.

[Jimmy Carr]

Oh yeah, sure, sure.

[Tom Segura]

This guy, this guy, he's in a three piece suit. Of course I'm gonna. Him.

[Jimmy Carr]

Of course. Yeah, of course, of course. Yeah. I don't know whether, I don't know whether People are looking. It's a weird thing where what people are looking for. Like guys go for looks, right? Which seems very shallow, but looks, it's proxies again, it's a proxy for healthy. Right. That's what it is. It's like something in us is going, that's healthy. She would give us good children. Great.

[Tom Segura]

That's our biological brain just going.

[Jimmy Carr]

And women are like. Women tend not to find boys very attractive. They find men attractive. You've kind of got to be 30 to be attractive. Because women go for competence. They do, but it's competence, like across the board. So. So it doesn't matter if you're a billionaire. It's like, okay, money. Well, he must be good at something. Or whether you can put up a shelf, right. And you could be your hands. You're like, it doesn't matter.

[Tom Segura]

It's like he's good at something, he's resolving.

[Jimmy Carr]

He can do something.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

Maybe you could help.

[Tom Segura]

I saw, I think it was a behavioral scientist say that the number one thing, whether or not they're aware of it or not, that a woman looks for in a partner, a male partner for long term, not a one night stand, but long term. Does their brain is going, does this guy treat me better than he treats other people in the room when it's like when I'm with him. So in other words, does the guy make the woman special, a priority?

[Jimmy Carr]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

Right. Treat her better than even the other people around. And that signals to a woman, oh, this is perhaps a good long term partner. The way that he engages me as opposed to how he engages everybody else.

[Jimmy Carr]

I could see that.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I always think that trick on like if you're dating someone, if you're. Even if you just mean someone hanging out, how they're treating the waiter is a really good indicator. That's the thing that is. I, I swear, someone's like, I told you stuff. You go, that guy, dude, I had. Because everyone's nice to me, right? I'm famous.

[Tom Segura]

I still remember getting a date with a girl that I was like, man, I cannot. But like, I can't believe she said yes.

[Guest/Producer]

Right?

[Jimmy Carr]

This is like, no, I'm with you. You don't need to convince me of that. Yeah, I can't believe I was like.

[Tom Segura]

I don't know, I was probably 23 or 4 and I was like, just like this woman was beautiful, right. And the. We walked from the car to this restaurant and she was so shitty to the parking attendant, like, the like, she was so rude and dismissive. That in the moment, I was like. Like, my. My attraction went down, like, 50. Immediately, I was like, ah, she's kind of a person.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

You know, it's just in an instant.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I'm still gonna fuck you, but there's gonna be some age.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

I put it in her, but I was like, I don't like you that much.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, yeah, No, I could. I could see that. It's like. It's a. It's a. It's a real tell. I suppose it's that thing, though, with very beautiful people. My friend Roisin Connaught, he's got a great theory on this.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

About how really beautiful people speak very slowly because they've never been interrupted.

[Tom Segura]

That's, of course.

[Jimmy Carr]

Of course. Like a beautiful girl. She can tell you how intuitive her cat is, and you go, all right.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Amazing.

[Tom Segura]

Like, it's very.

[Jimmy Carr]

She looks like her face caught fire. And they put it out with a hammer. You go, land the plane. Is there a story here? Is there a punchline?

[Tom Segura]

What's going on? Another behavioral thing that's fun to watch is to watch, like, other men. If you're. If you're around a beautiful woman and you watch how other men engage her in conversation, you're like, oh, really? This is interesting to you? Like, you watch them go like, that is. And it's. It's a red cat. That's neat. And they just.

[Jimmy Carr]

You Virgo.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Oh, right. With Libra rising.

[Guest/Producer]

Wow.

[Tom Segura]

My sister's a Virgo. And that. I was just. That's really neat. I love studying this stuff. And they just fully give in to the most boring conversation points. And you're like, oh, okay. This is. This is how we're designed. We're designed to do this. Just give all this attention to the most boring fucking story ever. Because it's a beautiful source.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, it seems. It seems kind of crazy.

[Tom Segura]

It is.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Well, that's how we're made.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. Well, where's your other half today? She's normally around.

[Tom Segura]

She's. She's in the back. I think she's taking a shit or something.

[Guest/Producer]

I don't.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, you really. You really keeping it alive.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Nice.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Her and Bert having an affair.

[Tom Segura]

God, I hope I. No, imagine that.

[Jimmy Carr]

Imagine walking on. On that.

[Tom Segura]

That would be my thing.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, walking in. Walking in on your wife is like. There's. There's better and worse positions to walk in on as well. Yeah, that would be.

[Tom Segura]

What would be the one. The worst one? Well, the worst one would be to see him on Top, I think, because it would look.

[Jimmy Carr]

You walk in and you're just looking into.

[Tom Segura]

There's a pregnant trans man on top of my wife.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

That'd be crazy to see.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. That would not be.

[Tom Segura]

And I wouldn't know who to even react to first.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think. I think the. The dream is you. The missus is. Is kind of reverse cowgirl and just. Oh, no, I can explain.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

What happened was.

[Tom Segura]

What happened was.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

I guess he has to lay on his back for it to get in.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think just health and safety. He has to be on. On.

[Tom Segura]

On his back.

[Jimmy Carr]

On his back.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think otherwise it's like a wardrobe falling on you with a key in it.

[Tom Segura]

You got to move the stomach up and kind of pull. You know, there's a lot of.

[Jimmy Carr]

There's a lot going on there.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Well, let's plant that idea in their head for sure. I'd love.

[Jimmy Carr]

That would be.

[Tom Segura]

That would be quite something new YMH Live idea.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

We could do a ticketed event. Probably sell a bunch of tickets to that.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think you could definitely sell. Yeah.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

You're in the. You're live from the cup chair. It's a new show.

[Tom Segura]

I think it's. That's a hit.

[Jimmy Carr]

Maybe that's. Maybe that's like a thing of like, I presume the cuck thing is like, you want someone to see someone fuck your wife very well.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Maybe there's a thing where I want my. I want my wife to be fucked very badly.

[Tom Segura]

I want her to know this real disappointment feels like, yeah, she's impressed with.

[Jimmy Carr]

Me, but look at this guy.

[Tom Segura]

You think I suck. Check this out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a good idea. You have a lady.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. Yeah. We've been together like 25 years.

[Tom Segura]

25 years.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. It's a long time. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Holy shit.

[Jimmy Carr]

How do you keep kids and everything and. Yeah, it's fun.

[Tom Segura]

How do you keep it fresh and exciting?

[Jimmy Carr]

I think the fresh and exciting is the next phase of it. I think, like, the thing is, like, happiness is your current situation minus expectations. Like, we've done the. The travel, the world, fancy holidays, all of that. Now we're kind of parents to young kids. And it's amazing fun. It's an amazing thing to kind of do together.

[Tom Segura]

How are you so fucking Zen on shit? I don't like you have. You just have such a Buddhist outlook on everything.

[Jimmy Carr]

No, I don't know about. I don't know about Buddhists, but yeah, I'm pretty happy.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I Think that thing about. I've always sort of thought this, like, disposition is more important than position.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

And the only thing that changes your, like, we all know, like, super wealthy guys that ostensibly have everything and they're just miserable.

[Tom Segura]

Miserable.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

And you go, yeah, they've got a terrible disposition. And the only thing that changes your disposition is kind of gratitude. She's going, well, I got this. These are the cards I got. I'm very happy with this. I'll roll with it.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Great.

[Tom Segura]

But you actually really practice. That seems.

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, I think about it quite a lot. Yeah. I suppose.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think I'm a. I'm an incredibly lucky dude.

[Tom Segura]

I do feel like when I get away from feeling and expressing gratitude is when I get the most. Kind of caught up in my own.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then when I remind myself of that and actually take just a beat of gratitude moments, I feel exponentially better.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's a weird thing, though. What? That. That thing of, like, comparison.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like people kind of compare themselves to someone. Of course, you go, oh, they're doing better, or there's something. But you discount everything else. You discount everything you've got. Yeah, well, it's. Yeah, we're all doing. We're all doing great. It's like weird, that thing of, like, going not to be all, you know, hippie ish about it.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

But the gratitude that we have is like. Yeah, we get to be comedians and we get to do the thing that we love and it's. That's really fun. But it's also that thing of, like, if we lived 100 years ago, like, we're so privileged to live now. Not because the money and the. And food and fame and whatever. It's that half the kids used to die.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

50% of kids died. If you have a kid, you go, what? That would. That would suck.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

People just had to just live with that. Horrific. When you think about it.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Having an absolute result.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

If it wasn't for your wife having such an obvious affair behind your back that everyone seems to know about your life would be brilliant, you guys.

[Tom Segura]

That real.

[Jimmy Carr]

She's in there right now and he's in there right now.

[Tom Segura]

Now you'd hear him. That's the thing. There's no. There's no not hearing him. He's just. It's just stealth.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

There's not a stealth bone in his body, dude.

[Jimmy Carr]

I wonder, is there a rom com with him in the lead?

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, definitely. Yes, I think you could. That's definitely something that would work.

[Jimmy Carr]

Ladies man.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, but don't, like. Don't be like, hey, like, tighten it up. Get. Get in shape for it, you know? No, be.

[Jimmy Carr]

You know, him as the. Him is the new Bond. I could really.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, my God. That'd be just him in your suit, walking in those seven double double Osos and soda. I mean, double. Oh, seven.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

He'd be ordering drinks when he's supposed to be saying his name.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Who do you think's gonna get it, by the way? Do you know? You probably know.

[Jimmy Carr]

I. I don't know. I hope it's. I don't know. I hope they do something fun with it.

[Tom Segura]

I think it's a sassy black woman. Is that what you mean?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, that's. That's. That's got to be. Isn't it?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Like, why isn't it a sassy.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like the Daniel Craig movies? I really like those.

[Tom Segura]

I did, too. I thought they were.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. Fantastic.

[Tom Segura]

I think if you were like, you know, if you love the franchise, you obviously have this. You have an affection for the franchise. Right. So, you know, the eras, and Sean Connery is, you know, like that. Everyone's like, he's the original, and these are great, and there's something fun about. But the Craig movies became, I think, arguably, like, just the best films. Like, he and the producers and everybody around them made the character have more depth, made the character more of a real guy. Not just like, this is just the coolest guy. Like, there was just more vulnerability. And I think the stories became better.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, I think they could do. I mean, listen, if I was in charge, I'd get Christopher Nolan to direct it.

[Guest/Producer]

Oh.

[Jimmy Carr]

And I'd set it in the 1950s in the cold War.

[Tom Segura]

But there was a.

[Jimmy Carr]

There was just go. Just go back, because everything now is just going to be. I don't know who's going to be the baddie.

[Tom Segura]

He was in talks for it several years ago.

[Jimmy Carr]

Was he?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Yes. But they.

[Jimmy Carr]

I think he does one thing at a time. He's got. He's this guy that goes. He's making a movie. So he's making. I think he's making. Is it Ulysses at the moment?

[Tom Segura]

Yes. That's what.

[Jimmy Carr]

So he's. And he goes, I'll do that. And someone. I think his producer came to him and they want to talk to you about Bond. And he got. No, when I'm finished with this. Yeah, I'm doing this now.

[Tom Segura]

But the. The Odyssey, the. At least the story that I heard about with Nolan and Bond is that he was, like, interested, but hey, I'm going to do, you know, I'm Christopher Nolan. I'm going to do my version of this. And it was like, well, no, no, no, you still have to do. And then that's what took him out of it. Like.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Tom Segura]

Like not having complete control.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. And obviously it's, it's. It's prime video. So Bond is going to spend a lot of time on his laptop ordering shit for the house.

[Tom Segura]

That's right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Gonna be a whole sequence.

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Tom Segura]

Is it, Is it. Is that what it said too?

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, same thing. Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Major sticking point in past negotiations was Nolan's assistance on having a final creative control, final cut, which they kind of.

[Jimmy Carr]

I kind of like the idea that there's. We still care about this one because it's weird how franchises can get messed up. Like the Disney. You go, Disney Corporation, like, that's the biggest entertainment corporation in the world. Right. And they've got Star Wars. Now you go, wow, this is gonna be great. And they made a couple of good seasons.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Something. And then they made some absolute dog shit. And you go, what, What? How did you mess that up?

[Tom Segura]

Well, it's got that. That the arms of that franchise have also just grown, so there's so many properties within it now.

[Jimmy Carr]

The point was you had to make it special.

[Tom Segura]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

You have to make it special.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Wait.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, you can wait.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

You don't have to do it all.

[Jimmy Carr]

Waiting was the thing that made it.

[Tom Segura]

That's right.

[Jimmy Carr]

The queuing up and being excited about the new one. That was. That was it.

[Tom Segura]

GTA 6, man. We're all, when are we getting this right?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

God damn it. I want to see how you get to kidnap somebody in 8k. Why can't we just get that already? Fuckers.

[Jimmy Carr]

When is it? When's it coming out?

[Guest/Producer]

This is.

[Tom Segura]

It's been 11 plus years, right. More. When is. When is. Didn't they make an official announcement? Oh, they did.

[Guest/Producer]

Okay.

[Tom Segura]

The official release date, May 26, 2026 for PlayStation 5 and Xbox. It's just an incredible. They say the delay was giving the team more time to finish the game properly, noting the significant public interest in it. And when did the last one come out? Because I think it was. Is it 2014? That's an incredible wait time between, like, for a franchise.

[Jimmy Carr]

But you go, I suppose 13. But what's that worth as a. As a franchise? It's bigger than.

[Tom Segura]

Do you ever look at anything? I didn't know about this until a few years ago.

[Jimmy Carr]

The video games is what it's worth more Than, oh, my God. Movies and music combined.

[Tom Segura]

Oh. The revenue is like. You're like, what? I had no idea. And I was like, it was. I forget which game. If it was like, you know, Call of Duty or like, Redemption. Whatever it was, they were like, day one of this anticipated game was like 890 million in sales. Like, day one, you're like, oh, my God. Like, it is blowing that shit out of the water. Look at this. Look at this, bro.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Film revenue for 2024, 33.9 billion. Music 28.6. Video games 184 billion.

[Jimmy Carr]

Can we see. Can we see where stand up comedy goes in there? Is that like. Like, listen, we've got a dog in the race. We're catching up.

[Tom Segura]

It's really incredible. I mean, that. That is an astonishing amount.

[Jimmy Carr]

And it's kind of weird now how, like, there's less movies being made.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Like, there's less. It feels to me like they used to be. Maybe this is just two old dudes talking, but it used to be like, I don't know, 100 albums came out a year, right. That were kind of good. And they, you know, some did better than others, but it was all, like, they all did okay. There was bands that all did okay, and then there was like 100 books a year that all did kind of okay.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

And now it feels like everything's gone to. Because the algorithm just. If you're 1% better, you do 300 times better in sales because everyone just goes for the best. So the top three artists sell all the records. Well, I wonder, will comedy go that way?

[Tom Segura]

Doesn't kind of the machine that was film coming out or music, let's say, when. When an album was coming out, it's like you had, okay, the album's here. The record company and their marketing division would devise a plan to bring awareness to this album. You knew that the album was going to come out on a Tuesday. They would set up, like, pressers and events, like, just. And then you would be like, it is here. It's like a whole thing now. It's just like, it's out. You just. Yeah, I didn't know it was out. Same thing with movies. They're just out. Unless it is like a huge. Like a Taylor Swift thing or Star wars where there's like, this is now. We're gonna put real marketing dollars behind this.

[Jimmy Carr]

I got a movie coming out in December.

[Guest/Producer]

Do you?

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Congrats.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, it's. It's. It's pretty fun. It's like the elevator pitch Is good. We'll say, okay, so it's Downton Abbey meets Airplane.

[Tom Segura]

Oh, really?

[Jimmy Carr]

We made like a funny.

[Tom Segura]

Like a parody kind of.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah. Parody.

[Tom Segura]

That's very cool.

[Jimmy Carr]

I was a big fan of Mel Brooks growing up. Like, I always thought those movies were just the funniest thing that I could watch again and again and again.

[Tom Segura]

You live upstairs, I'm guessing, in this.

[Jimmy Carr]

Parody, are you priest in it? I just have a little bit part in it. Damien Lewis is in it. It's pretty. It's good.

[Tom Segura]

Great.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's called Fackham Hall.

[Tom Segura]

Fak Em Hall.

[Jimmy Carr]

Fuck em all.

[Tom Segura]

Fuck them all.

[Jimmy Carr]

Fuck them all. Fakum Hall. It's fun. It's a fun little, fun little movie. But yeah, that's opening on like a thousand screens in the States in, in December. And you kind of go, well, I don't know how to tell people now. I guess I'll just tell them on social media because, well, that's the. What's the point of putting a poster up? It doesn't.

[Tom Segura]

It doesn't do anything.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

And then now, I mean, I've had the conversation, I don't know if you had, about like promoting other. Any other projects, whether you go, you know, you used to be like, well, I'll just do like this interview and that'll cover, you know, these series of interviews and they're like, I mean, can you do more podcasts? Like more podcasts? Like, yeah, that's what people are watching, listening to. So just do more of those.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, we kind of make sense now. It used to be that you went on the Tonight show and then everyone so knew it.

[Tom Segura]

They all knew what you were doing.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, I guess. I guess it moves on. It is that thing about our culture is downstream of our technology. That thing of like the podcast has become the long form kind of great. Kind of great. It's a nice thing. I think the. I think slightly it speaks to the people are a little bit isolated. They're on their own doing things or whatever. I mean, it's nice if you're driving or whatever, you're messing around, you're listening to something.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

You're kind of not bored because there's a conversation going on.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tom Segura]

I mean, I enjoy long form conversations more than watching a. Like, if I want to see an artist, you know, who's doing late night, it's like, yeah, it might be like a fun appearance, but if you tell me that that artist who I'm interested in is having like an hour long dialogue with you, I'd be like, oh, I'd rather watch that.

[Jimmy Carr]

Is that thing about you go, I don't know who your favorite, like, media or creative is. Like, for me, it'd probably be Quentin Tarantino. And you go, quentin Tarantino on the Tonight Show? Yeah, they're fine. Entertaining. Like, they played a game, they did something. Yeah, but him for three hours talking about movies. You go, yeah, all day. I could. I won't be able to take my eyes off.

[Tom Segura]

Quentin Tarantino was here. He sat right there. So if you have not seen it, watch Quentin Tarantino come here. And he got mad at me at the end, but that's not the point.

[Jimmy Carr]

Why did he get mad at you? What did you. What did you fuck up? Sounds like you fucked up. I'm on his side 100% on this. What'd you get wrong?

[Tom Segura]

Okay, so I get the call that Quentin's coming to Austin. He's going to do the podcast. And I was like, great.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, sure.

[Tom Segura]

And they're like, he's coming in, he's promoting his book. I go, okay, so I'm in Seattle. His agent emails me, and he goes, I don't know if I can get you the book before, like, Tuesday. He's like, yeah, the book drops Tuesday, and I don't know if I can get you an advanced copy. And I'm like, fine. Like, I. I do my weekend, I come home, I come here Monday, and when I get here, the book's here.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

Is this Cinema Speculation? That book? It's an amazing book. Well, it's incredible.

[Tom Segura]

I pick up.

[Jimmy Carr]

You read it because, I mean, you want to read it before you exactly interview him.

[Tom Segura]

And I did. I did read the first 15 pages, so. Ah, Tuesday morning.

[Jimmy Carr]

Hey, Quinn. Yeah. I saw the trailer for your new movie. Looks. Looks interesting. Yeah, I didn't watch the whole thing.

[Tom Segura]

I have the. Actually the best conversation with him, and we're talking all about movies, specific stories that he's like, I've never told this story before. I'm like, great. Tells me the story about, like, Bruce Willis. I was like, how did. Like, how did Bruce Willis end up in Pulp? Like, tell me. He's like, I've never told this story. Tells the story. It's a fantastic story.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

He starts telling all these things, and we're just talking all about his movies, his writing, is directing, his editing, like, you know, all these things about how he's, you know, I'm a huge fan of. And then we're like, all right, like, I know, I know he has an out, right? He's like, you know, they're like, he has to leave at a certain point. I'm like, I know. He goes, we're gonna talk about the book. And I go, what? He goes, I mean, that's why I'm here. We're gonna talk about the book. I go, yeah. So I'm like. I go, whatever question. He goes, that's on like page six. And I go, it's one of my favorite pages, you know? And he's like. He goes, you didn't read the book?

[Jimmy Carr]

Well, no one listening's read the book yet. You could talk about the book.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I tried, but you could tell he was just like, the man. You didn't read the book? I'm like, well, I'll read it tomorrow.

[Jimmy Carr]

The book. The book is kind of great. Did you read it since.

[Guest/Producer]

No.

[Jimmy Carr]

Do you know what?

[Tom Segura]

It's.

[Jimmy Carr]

The book on tape is amazing because he reads it and it's really. It's just effusive. Like, he's love of movies. So I did a thing where there's a weird thing where you go, where do you get your dopamine? Where'd you get your serotonin? So most people watch new movies and they listen to old music. So I switched it last year and I listened to just new music, just stuff I hadn't heard before, like found playlists and things of new stuff and watched old 70s movies. It's much better. Like, there's something about the new is very attractive. You go, even 70s movies that you think you've seen, even if you go, yeah, Taxi Driver. Yeah, I know, I've seen Taxi Driver. And you go, yeah, you saw it 25 years ago, right?

[Tom Segura]

Watch it.

[Jimmy Carr]

You don't you remember one scene?

[Guest/Producer]

Yes.

[Jimmy Carr]

And you know, it's great. Watch it again. It's amazing.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, I just rewatched French Connection.

[Jimmy Carr]

Oh, it's. It's unbelievable.

[Tom Segura]

Fantastic. Unbelievable.

[Jimmy Carr]

They nearly killed someone in the car chase and just kept it in.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

They also were like shooting in New York with like, no permit. They're like, hurry up and get over there. So, like, before somebody sees us, like, just shot the scene and you're like. And there's also this thing about. I'm kind of obsessed with the today's filmmaking. Like the way that I think audiences have attention on something. There's always like 30 edits for everything going on. So it's like, here, here, here, why everything? And you go back to a lot of 70s movies and there'll be one shot where you actually see life taking place. In other words, the coffee being poured isn't like, thing like. Like where you see it. Like, you just see somebody put the thing in, put it, press the button, and you're like, oh, yeah, I'm. I'm watching this moment take place, and then the feeling that you're supposed to kind of feel, whether it's supposed to be like, this is a mundane morning for this guy. You feel it, you go, this is like.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's a really strong case on Those, like, the 70s movies as well, when you watch them and you go, there's a certain amount of toxic masculinity in those movies.

[Tom Segura]

Fantastic.

[Jimmy Carr]

And we don't make them anymore, so we used to make a cowboy movie once a week. And, like a mob movie kind of replaced the cowboy movies.

[Guest/Producer]

Right.

[Jimmy Carr]

But it was. Those were our stories. In the same way that women have, like, you know, they might have romantic fiction, that. That's their stories, their little fantasy world. And we've got our little fantasy world. And if you take that away from our culture, which we have.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

Then you end up with Andrew Tate online because you go, there's a demand for that. Yeah, there's a demand for that. So you go, well, no, it's. It was really healthy. Those movies were kind of great.

[Tom Segura]

Yeah, they're kind of great. And I shall say, this Tarantino is. Was fucking awesome here. Like, I. I should have read the book.

[Jimmy Carr]

You should have read the book. Can't believe you didn't read the book.

[Tom Segura]

I mean, I had, like, an hour, dude. I didn't have enough time. Those first. First 15.

[Jimmy Carr]

Just unacceptable.

[Tom Segura]

Those 15 pages were.

[Jimmy Carr]

This is why you stuck with guests like me.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

Will you come back?

[Jimmy Carr]

Quenton, please come back.

[Tom Segura]

I'll read it.

[Guest/Producer]

All right.

[Tom Segura]

Check out Jimmy Carr on Tour. Go to jimmycar.com. he is in the US now. UK, Europe. You're going to be in Australia and New Zealand in early 26.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, it's gonna be lovely.

[Tom Segura]

Always have the best time in both of those places. It's the best.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's incredible.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's like the audiences are so kind of there and so kind of. Especially if you tour. Like, I don't just do the main cities. I play everywhere in New Zealand and Australia.

[Guest/Producer]

Really?

[Jimmy Carr]

And the people, like, they're just kind of, like, excited you come. If you go to Invercargill and Dunedin in New Zealand, people are excited that you're there.

[Tom Segura]

I have, you know, you. You clock. Your brain will clock great. Like, great. Where you're like, that was a great night.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah.

[Tom Segura]

One of the most fun shows I've ever had was on my last tour at. In Christchurch.

[Jimmy Carr]

Oh, I love Christchurch.

[Tom Segura]

And I had no idea where I was going. I mean, you know, I didn't know anything about it. And I just got there, and I was like, all right. And then that show from. From the backstage moment where you go, like, what's up, everybody? Like, to the house of, you know, the voice of God Mike, where, like, when they cheered, we all looked at each other like, what the. Like, it was so energetic, and the show was just unbelievable.

[Jimmy Carr]

Yeah, it's the best.

[Tom Segura]

The best.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's the best.

[Tom Segura]

Thank you, as always, for coming in, man.

[Jimmy Carr]

It's great to see you, man.

[Tom Segura]

It's great to see you too. Thank you, guys, for watching, listening. We'll hope Bert recovers.

[Jimmy Carr]

I mean, you can't recover from that.

[Tom Segura]

It's like, yeah, you're dead.

[Jimmy Carr]

But we're gonna get. We're gonna get. We're gonna do a seance next time, and we're gonna speak to him from beyond the grave.

[Tom Segura]

God bless Bert and Tom.

[Guest/Producer]

Tom and Bert.

[Jimmy Carr]

One goes topless while the other wears a shirt. Tom tells stories, and Burt's the machine.

[Guest/Producer]

There's not a chance in hell that they'll keep.

[Jimmy Carr]

Trip Planner by Expedia. You were made to outdo your holiday, your hammocking, and your pooling. We were made to help organize the competition. Expedia made to travel. Keep it clean.

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