Podcast Summary: "Ripping Beers & Running 5K's w/ Jason Kelce, N.O.R.E, and Beau Allen"

Podcast Information:

• Title: 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
• Host/Author: YMH Studios
• Episode: Ripping Beers & Running 5K's w/ Jason Kelce, N.O.R.E, and Beau Allen
• Release Date: May 12, 2025

1. Event and Race Setup

The episode kicks off with Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer hosting the show from Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Florida, amidst a bustling 5K event. Bert humorously admits to being heavily intoxicated at the start:

Bert Kreischer [00:15]: "What of is Am I? I'm hammered."

Tom introduces the premise of the 5K, crediting Bert’s idea, albeit with playful skepticism:

Tom Segura [00:18]: "If you're listening, we are at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa. Florida. And there's a 5K, which was. I think it was your goddamn idea."

Bert downplays their past entrepreneurial ventures, highlighting their numerous "dumb ideas" but acknowledges the success of this particular event:

Bert Kreischer [00:44]: "Two Bears racing... We were so hungover this morning. I was like, there's no way I'm running this race."

2. Introduction of Guests

As the event unfolds, the hosts welcome special guests, including Nori from the popular podcast Drink Champs, NFL star Jason Kelce, and fellow comedian Beau Allen. The camaraderie is evident as they engage in playful banter, sharing personal anecdotes and humorous exchanges.

Tom Segura [04:27]: "Nori, will you let them take your blood pressure?"

Nori [04:44]: "I'm also an alcoholic that likes to jog."

3. Running and Drinking Concepts

A significant portion of the conversation revolves around the unconventional combination of running and drinking, inspired by the "beer mile" concept. Nori introduces the idea of integrating alcohol consumption with the physical challenge of a 5K race, leading to spirited discussions about endurance and camaraderie.

Nori [05:00]: "I get a euphoria high from jogging and the fact that you have all these maniacs out here."

The hosts and guests humorously debate the feasibility and absurdity of combining excessive drinking with running, highlighting the unique nature of their event.

Bert Kreischer [06:42]: "Box of wine on the treadmill… I can put 14 miles in."

4. Football Anecdotes with Jason Kelce

Jason Kelce shares experiences from his NFL career, discussing the physical and mental challenges of being an offensive lineman. The conversation delves into memorable matchups and the intense preparation required for professional football.

Unnamed Speaker (Jason Kelce) [31:18]: "When we were in Philly, Dallas's O line was incredible. They had Zach Martin, Travis Frederick. Zeke was cooking and I was a nose guard."

Bert and Tom add their perspectives, emphasizing the demanding nature of their positions and the teamwork involved.

Bo Allen [32:05]: "Played the worst position in the NFL. Yeah, like just be fat as and try and take on two offensive linemen every single snap."

5. Personal Stories and Humorous Moments

The episode is rich with personal tales and lighthearted humor. Nori recounts his past misadventures, including his introduction to alcohol through a heavy mortgage on Japanese whiskey, leading to funny and relatable moments.

Nori [06:17]: "I gave you a bottle of Pappy and we drank the whole bottle. Holy selfishly."

Discussions about nicknames, hip-hop influences, and pop culture references add depth and entertainment value to the conversation.

Nori [37:49]: "How did you in hip hop, how did you come up with Nori? I read a book about Manuel Noriega… I shortened it to Nori."

6. Concluding Remarks and Wrap-Up

As the event draws to a close, the hosts express gratitude towards their guests and attendees, celebrating the blend of running and revelry. The episode wraps up with plans for future events and a final round of humorous exchanges involving pancakes and lighthearted antics.

Tom Segura [67:50]: "Thank you to Mike Cowton. All the celebrities that said they were gonna show up and showed up. Cheers, everybody."

Bert Kreischer [68:41]: "Do you, like, kind of hate your brother and love your brother?"

Throughout the episode, the essence of friendship and mutual support shines, encapsulating the spirit of "Two Bears, One Cave."

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Bert Kreischer [00:15]: "What of is Am I? I'm hammered."
• Tom Segura [04:27]: "Nori, will you let them take your blood pressure?"
• Nori [05:00]: "And I get a euphoria high from jogging and the fact that you have all these maniacs out here."
• Bert Kreischer [06:42]: "Box of wine on the treadmill… I can put 14 miles in."
• Unnamed Speaker (Jason Kelce) [31:18]: "When we were in Philly, Dallas's O line was incredible."
• Bo Allen [32:05]: "Played the worst position in the NFL. Yeah, like just be fat as and try and take on two offensive linemen every single snap."
• Nori [37:49]: "How did you in hip hop, how did you come up with Nori? I read a book about Manuel Noriega… I shortened it to Nori."
• Tom Segura [67:50]: "Thank you to Mike Cowton. All the celebrities that said they were gonna show up and showed up. Cheers, everybody."
• Bert Kreischer [68:41]: "Do you, like, kind of hate your brother and love your brother?"

This episode of "2 Bears, 1 Cave" masterfully blends humor, personal anecdotes, and engaging discussions, offering listeners a glimpse into the dynamic friendship between Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer, along with their interactions with notable guests like Jason Kelce and Nori from Drink Champs. Whether you're a fan of comedy, running, or football, this episode delivers a hearty mix of laughter and relatable stories.