2 Bears, 1 Cave w/ Sebastian Maniscalco: “Robert DeNiro Didn't Wanna Be Friends”

Podcast: 2 Bears, 1 Cave (YMH Studios)
Hosts: Bert Kreischer & Tom Segura
Guest: Sebastian Maniscalco
Release Date: October 20, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode features comedian Sebastian Maniscalco joining Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura (briefly) in the cave for a rich, warm, and hilarious conversation about the realities of comedy stardom, balancing family life, the quirks of personal rituals, and the oddities of comedian friendship—all in classic 2 Bears style. From behind-the-scenes stand-up insights to personal tales of parenting, fashion faux pas, and the surprise of Robert DeNiro’s aloofness, this episode is a delightful deep dive into the lives and minds of top comics.

Main Discussion Themes

1. The Evolution and Joys of Comedy Careers

• Standup, Movies & Transitioning Interests

  • Bert and Sebastian discuss what keeps comedians motivated after major success.
  • Bert speculates Tom might be wrapping up standup to focus on TV and film ([01:45–02:00]).
  • They muse on how personal life—like having kids—shapes career choices.

  Key Quote:
  Bert: “Segura’s done. This is his last tour, his last special... he really got into this to make movies and television.” ([01:49])
  Sebastian: “I love standup comedy. Other than that, everything else is kind of just gravy.” ([03:26])

• The Math of Standup
  Bert shares how watching Sebastian and Nate Bargatze makes him question his own comedic process ([02:10]).

  Notable Quote:
  Bert: “You have such an ability to make me giggle... I can’t figure out how to replicate what you do.” ([02:10])

2. Parenting, Sensitivity, and Emotional Vulnerability

• Fatherhood & Crying
  The trio opens up about being sensitive dads and how parenthood reconfigures their emotional sensitivity ([04:30–07:20]).

  Sebastian: “My son came up to me the other day, and he's like, Daddy, could you coach my soccer team? That's it. I'm bawling.” ([03:26])
  Bert: “I sobbed. And my daughters make fun of me. I can tell you the dumbest movies...” ([05:28])

• Enjoying Success and Staying Grounded
  Discussion on how family and upbringing keep them humble—Sebastian attributes his Sicilian roots and private family celebrations ([08:06]), while Bert craves energy and people around him ([08:49]).

3. Comedian Dynamics & The Origin of Friendships

• The Baseball Game Origin Story
  The comedians reminisce about their early days bonding over “home run derby” games in LA parks, observing each other's quirks ([16:28–19:47]).

  Bert: “You were taking ’em out of the box—shoes, brand new glove, batting gloves on both hands... I couldn’t stop giggling at you getting dressed.” ([16:56])

• Male Friendship, Marriage, and the Search for Outlets
  Sebastian notes how marriage and fatherhood can isolate men, and expresses a yearning for renewed male camaraderie (like golf) ([19:50]).

4. Comedy Industry Realities

• Number of True Stand-Up Comics
  Spirited debate about what qualifies someone as a "real comedian"—from open mic-ers to club acts ([26:46–33:11]).

  Sebastian: “I would say 200 [stand-up comics].”
  Bert: “200 to 400, I would say, just roughly.”

• The Bit Development Process
  Bert and Sebastian agree: the thrill is in developing and refining material, not in the repetition or final taping ([34:11]).

  Bert: “The joy of a bit is... as you say it, you’ve left it, but your brain goes, you know what I should have said with that is this... That feeling is the addictive feeling.” ([33:30])

5. Performing, Crowd Dynamics, and Classic Bits

• Inclusion of “Hits” in Specials
  They discuss whether to repeat fan-favorite bits or always keep things fresh—shout-out to Seinfeld’s perspective on doing the classics ([35:36]).

  Sebastian: “He [Seinfeld] just loves... why would I not tell the older stuff? It’s stuff that I worked on for years and I’ve polished and crafted…” ([35:36])

• Arena/Pricing Challenges & Ticket Sales
  The realities of selling big venues and the unique stress of watching the “blue dots” on seat maps ([43:18–44:04]), which only a small handful of comics understand.

6. Personal Quirks, Routines, and Domesticity

• Fashion and Dressing
  Sebastian’s wardrobe evolution (thanks to his wife Lana) and the demise of the “Seven Diamonds” trend. Bert confesses to living in comfort with little attention to outfits ([15:14–16:28]).

• Robes and Showers
  Sebastian is a robe devotee; Bert prefers nudity. They compare hygiene routines and discuss the etiquette of peeing outside and short shorts ([68:02–70:32]).

  Sebastian: “I put a robe on as soon as I get up... I have robes, different robes for different times of the year.” ([70:00])

• Parenting & Discipline
  Sebastian is the disciplinarian at home, trying to ensure his kids grow up grounded and grateful despite their easier upbringing ([60:02–61:58]).

7. Robert De Niro, Movie Work, and (Not) Making Friends

• Robert De Niro Experience
  Sebastian candidly reveals that De Niro was friendly but distant while filming—no dinners, hangouts, or real relationship, even over 9 weeks of filming ([40:16–41:06]).

  Sebastian: “We would do a scene and he would go to his chair and have, like, paperwork, be on the phone… it was strictly a professional relationship.” ([40:31])

8. The Pete and Sebastian Show & Comedic Chemistry

• Podcast Origin & Dynamic
  Sebastian tells how his podcast with Pete Correale started—traveling small towns in Canada, their opposite lifestyles (“wine and cheese” vs. “beer and peanuts”), and their twelve-year chemistry ([63:48–64:24]).

  Sebastian: “He's a beer and peanut guy. I'm like a wine and cheese guy.” ([64:24])

• Appreciation for Pete
  Bert gushes about Pete’s comedic brilliance—on stage and in life ([65:43]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Comedy War Stories:
  “When you get finally do an hour, the month leading up, I’m like, get me out of here... It’s like graduating high school, being bullied all year for four years.”
  — Bert Kreischer ([34:52])

• On Repeating Material:
  “If you talk to Seinfeld, he just loves... why would I not tell the older stuff?"
  — Sebastian Maniscalco ([35:36])

• On De Niro:
  "Didn’t go to dinner, didn’t hang out, nothing. Strictly a professional relationship. He’s got a family..."
  — Sebastian Maniscalco ([40:31])

• On Friendship Origins:
  "And that’s how I met all you guys, really. Was that one period."
  — Bert Kreischer ([19:47])

• The Arrogance of Boring:
  “There must be boring people that are so arrogant, that are like, I like to be quiet... you’re not quiet, you have nothing to say.”
  — Bert Kreischer ([38:05])

• On Parenting & Discipline:
  “No one’s gonna give you anything in life, including me, so go make your bed.”
  — Sebastian Maniscalco ([60:45])

• The Joy in Wanting:
  “The best part of buying something is wanting something. It’s not the buying, it’s not the having, it’s the wanting. Wanting is my favorite part.”
  — Bert Kreischer ([24:53])

Highlighted Segments & Timestamps

• Sebastian on His New Special & Family Priorities
  [01:02–03:26] — Standup, transitioning to family life, and what’s next.

• Sensitivity, Parenting, and Crying
  [05:28–07:11] — How kids and age have made Bert more emotional.

• Comedian Friendship & Baseball Stories
  [16:28–19:47] — The home run derby games and how they bonded comedians.

• Wearing Robes, Shower Habits and Domestic Rituals
  [68:19–72:08] — The difference in morning routines and personal comfort.

• Robert De Niro “Friendship” Reveal
  [40:16–41:06] — Sebastian lays out his “no real friendship” experience with De Niro.

• The Nature of Standup Careers & Who “Counts” as a Comedian
  [26:44–33:11] — A philosophical debate peppered with wit.

• Inclusion of Classic Bits: Seinfeld’s Influence
  [35:36–36:39] — Should comics recycle their greatest hits?

• The Pete and Sebastian Podcast Origin Story
  [63:48–65:01] — How their long-running show came to life.

Tone & Style

The episode is informal, honest, and self-deprecating—full of gentle ribbing, vulnerability, and genuine admiration among peers. It’s equal parts inside-baseball standup talk and relatable stories about marriage, family, and the absurdities of daily life.

Key Takeaways

• Comedic fulfillment evolves—motivations shift but love of the art remains.
• Major fame alters social interactions and friendships—sometimes it just means De Niro won’t grab dinner with you.
• Personal quirks (whether it’s robe-wearing or peeing outside) become points of comfort and humor, especially among friends.
• Raising grounded kids in the world of showbiz is an ongoing struggle—with reflections on their own upbringings guiding their instincts.
• Lasting comedian friendships often start with shared rituals (be it baseball or podcasts) and survive the ups and downs of success.
• Classic bits still matter—comedian “greatest hits” are often what fans and friends both want.
• Beneath the jokes, these comics prioritize presence and authenticity in family life and in their material.

For New Listeners

This episode stands out for its open, real conversation about the comedian’s life on and off stage—no topics are off-limits, and the laughter is as heartfelt as it is hilarious. Whether you’re a comedy fan, a parent, or just someone who loves good storytelling, there’s something here for you.