Podcast Summary: 3 Takeaways - Episode #221: Blunt Wisdom From the World’s Top Executive Coach
Host: Lynn Thoman
Guest: Marshall Goldsmith
Release Date: October 29, 2024
Introduction
In episode #221 of 3 Takeaways, host Lynn Thoman engages in a profound conversation with Marshall Goldsmith, widely recognized as the world's leading executive coach. Goldsmith, founder of the 100 Coaches organization and a New York Times bestselling author, has coached illustrious CEOs such as Jim Kim (former World Bank CEO), Alan Mullally (former Ford CEO), and Raj Shah (President of the Rockefeller Foundation). This episode delves into the nuances of success, the common pitfalls even top achievers encounter, and strategies for achieving both career success and personal fulfillment.
The Essence of Coaching
Timestamp [02:10] - [03:43]
Marshall Goldsmith articulates his unique coaching philosophy, emphasizing stakeholder-centered coaching. Unlike traditional Socratic methods used by organizations like the International Coaching Federation (ICF), Goldsmith's approach focuses on feedback from those surrounding the individual. He states:
“In stakeholder-centered coaching, you learn from everyone around you.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [02:25]
Goldsmith differentiates his method from advisory roles, highlighting the importance of aligning coaching strategies with clients' specific needs, whether behavioral or strategic.
Qualities of the Most Successful People
Timestamp [03:53] - [05:51]
When discussing the attributes that distinguish the great from the near great, Goldsmith underscores the significance of behavioral competencies over technical skills. He notes:
“Listening is definitely one of those qualities. And it is one of those qualities. It does separate the great from the near great.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [04:44]
Goldsmith emphasizes the continuous pursuit of self-improvement through asking for input, active listening, and maintaining humility. He introduces the concept that past achievements ("what got you here") may not suffice for future success ("what will get you there").
Behavioral Mistakes of Highly Successful Individuals
Timestamp [05:12] - [08:24]
Goldsmith reveals a paradox among high achievers: their relentless drive to win can lead to interpersonal conflicts and unhappiness. He explains:
“Winners love winning. It's hard for winners not to win.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [06:39]
Using relatable scenarios, such as disagreements over restaurant choices or dismissing a partner’s tough day, Goldsmith illustrates how the compulsion to "win" often sabotages relationships and personal fulfillment.
Insights from "What Got You Here Won't Get You There"
Timestamp [08:24] - [10:08]
Goldsmith discusses the core message of his renowned book, which contemplates advice one might give to their younger self. He outlines three pivotal themes derived from interviews with elderly individuals reflecting on life:
-
Be Happy Now:
“Be happy when. Well, when is that old person learning point from old people? I got so busy chasing what I did not have, I could not see what I did have at almost everything.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [09:10] -
Value Relationships Over Success:
Friends and family often suffer as individuals climb corporate ladders, leading to neglected personal connections. -
Pursue Your Dreams Without Delay:
Encourage taking risks and pursuing passions early, as the likelihood diminishes with age.
The Philosophy of "Life is Good"
Timestamp [10:08] - [13:36]
Goldsmith shares the personal mantra behind his email sign-off, "Life is good," explaining it serves as a daily reminder of gratitude, comparing his current blessings to past hardships. He further explores the Buddhist philosophy embedded in his favorite movie, The Wizard of Oz, illustrating that fulfillment comes from within:
“Dorothy is looking for this place out there, Oz, this beautiful place, Oz, which she realized at the end, it's not out there, it's in here.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [13:00]
This segment emphasizes mindfulness and the importance of finding happiness in the present moment rather than chasing external achievements.
Stories Illustrating Core Principles
Timestamp [13:57] - [17:02]
Goldsmith recounts impactful stories from his book The Earned Life that encapsulate his teachings:
-
The Husband and Wife Weekend Story:
Illustrates the importance of acknowledging and appreciating present behaviors over dwelling on past mistakes. -
The Golfer and the Beer Can:
A metaphor from the Bhagavad Gita about focusing on the present shot rather than external distractions or past outcomes. Goldsmith interprets it as:“Hit the shot in front of you. You can't change the past. Make the best of it. It is what it is.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [16:00] -
The Marshmallow Study Critique:
Challenges the overemphasis on delayed gratification by highlighting the potential for perpetual postponement, advocating for balanced decision-making.
Personal Reflections and Advice
Timestamp [17:02] - [22:09]
Goldsmith shares transformative lessons learned from working with top executives:
“Nobody gives a pass in life. Every day you wake up and start over.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [19:40]
He underscores the humanity of successful individuals, reminding listeners that no level of achievement exempts one from personal struggles and the need for continuous self-improvement.
Marshall Goldsmith’s Three Takeaways
Timestamp [20:23] - [22:09]
Concluding the episode, Goldsmith presents three actionable takeaways for personal and professional growth:
-
Ask How You Can Be Better:
“Get in the habit of asking a question. How can I be a better...?”
—Marshall Goldsmith [20:23] -
Embrace Feedforward:
Seek constructive input without becoming defensive. Treat feedback as a gift and focus on actionable improvements. -
Daily Self-Evaluation:
Implement daily questions to assess progress in:- Setting and pursuing clear goals
- Finding personal happiness and meaning
- Building and nurturing positive relationships
- Being fully engaged and present in life
Goldsmith encourages a responsible and proactive approach to personal development:
“You take responsibility for one person. You know who that person is.”
—Marshall Goldsmith [22:06]
Conclusion
Marshall Goldsmith imparts valuable wisdom on achieving lasting success and fulfillment. By focusing on behavioral change, practicing gratitude, fostering meaningful relationships, and maintaining present-moment awareness, listeners are equipped with strategies to enhance both their professional trajectories and personal lives. This episode of 3 Takeaways serves as a compelling guide for anyone striving to understand and navigate the complexities of success and happiness.
Notable Quotes:
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Marshall Goldsmith [04:44]: “Listening is definitely one of those qualities. And it is one of those qualities. It does separate the great from the near great.”
-
Marshall Goldsmith [06:39]: “Winners love winning. It's hard for winners not to win.”
-
Marshall Goldsmith [09:10]: “Be happy when. Well, when is that old person learning point from old people? I got so busy chasing what I did not have, I could not see what I did have at almost everything.”
-
Marshall Goldsmith [13:00]: “Dorothy is looking for this place out there, Oz, this beautiful place, Oz, which she realized at the end, it's not out there, it's in here.”
-
Marshall Goldsmith [20:23]: “Get in the habit of asking a question. How can I be a better...?”
This comprehensive summary captures the essence of the conversation between Lynn Thoman and Marshall Goldsmith, providing actionable insights and highlighting the profound lessons shared during the episode.