Podcast Summary:

3 Takeaways, Episode #282 – Why Most New Year’s Resolutions Fail by March – and the Science of What Actually Works
Host: Lynn Thoman | Guest: Ayelet Fishbach | Date: December 30, 2025

Episode Overview

In this episode, Lynn Thoman interviews Professor Ayelet Fishbach, a leading expert on motivation, about why New Year’s resolutions so often fail within a few months and what the science actually says about making lasting change. They explore motivation, goal-setting, the importance of enjoyment, and practical strategies for sticking with resolutions. Fishbach distills decades of research into actionable advice, concluding with her signature “3 Takeaways.”

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Why Most Resolutions Fail (01:29–02:20)

• Observation: Many people start with strong intentions, but by March, most have abandoned their resolutions.
• Insight: Only about a third of people fully stick to their resolutions.
• Partial Success: Allowing for partial adherence, the success rate is a bit higher.
• Key Quote:

  "People that stick to the resolutions are those that are intrinsically motivated, those that tell us back in January that they are looking forward to adhering to this resolution, that they find it interesting and engaging and maybe even a little bit fun."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (01:41)

2. The Willpower Myth (02:20–03:07)

• Misconception: The challenge isn’t about lacking willpower.
• Reality: Strategy and knowledge matter more than brute willpower.
• Key Quote:

  "Willpower is nice. To have strategy is critical. To have knowledge is critical."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (02:27)

3. Goal Framing: Importance, Engagement, Enjoyment (03:07–03:28)

• Core Finding: Enjoyment and engagement predict adherence more than the perceived importance of the goal.
• Key Quote:

  "It's less the long term consequences and more about how it feels when you engage with a goal."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (03:15)

4. How to Frame and Structure Goals (03:28–05:18)

• Dual Clarity: Ask both “why” and “how.” Example: "Why exercise three times a week? Because I want to be healthy. How am I being healthy? By exercising three times a week."
• Time Frames: Break long-term goals into short-term, manageable subgoals to counter mid-project drop-off.
• Key Quote:

  "You need to ask why and you need to ask how."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (03:52)

5. The Role of Numbers and Targets (05:18–06:11)

• Motivating Metrics: Specific targets (how much, how soon) are more motivating than vague aims.
• Caution: Be realistic; overly rigid targets can be counterproductive.
• Key Quote:

  "Numbers motivate us... But be reasonable with your numbers."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (05:22)

• Memorable Example:

  "More people finish a marathon under four hours than over four hours because four hours is a very motivating target."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (05:38)

6. The Power of Advance Setup (06:08–07:14)

• Environmental Design: Make the desired action easier: lay out gym clothes, set an alarm, put healthy foods in sight.
• Key Quote:

  "Plan in advance, prepare, set situation so that you're going to respond to it in a way that advances your goals."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (07:06)

7. Finding Enjoyment in Unenjoyable Tasks (07:14–09:10)

• Challenge: We often set goals for tasks we don't naturally enjoy.

• Strategy: Find ways to make the process satisfying, even if not strictly enjoyable. Embrace initial discomfort as you build new habits.

• Key Quotes:

  "Find a relatively enjoyable way of doing it or an engaging way. It doesn't need to be enjoyment. It can be satisfying."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (08:23)

  "Sweating while exercising feels good. We don't like to sweat, but it feels like we are getting somewhere."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (09:00)

8. The Critical Role of Social Support (09:10–10:28)

• Insight: We are social animals; support and accountability are vital.
• Tactics: Let others know about your goals, engage friends or colleagues.
• Key Quote:

  "Social support is absolutely critical. As people, we are social animals. We live in groups. We do everything that's important for us with other people."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (09:17)

9. Overcoming the Midpoint Slump (10:28–11:22)

• Problem: Motivation drops in the “middle” of a long goal.
• Solution: Break goals into short-term subgoals; before the midpoint, focus on progress made, after the midpoint, focus on what’s left.
• Key Quote:

  "Until the midpoint it's often better to look back and say I have done 10, 20, 30%. ... And after the midpoint you want to look at what is left to do."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (10:52)

10. The ‘What the Hell’ Effect & Bouncing Back from Slips (11:22–12:48)

• Common Trap: One lapse can spiral into complete abandonment.

• Science: Expect setbacks (learned helplessness); key is to learn and adjust after each slip.

• Key Quotes:

  "No journey is going to not have setbacks. ... If I have learned nothing from the slip, then not only I have failed once, but I am likely to fail again because there was no learning."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (11:55)

  "It's absolutely expected that you will slip, so don't beat yourself over this. But it is expected also that you will learn from it."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (12:48)

11. How to Design Personal Resolutions: Step-by-Step (13:14–14:14)

• Ayelet’s Steps:

  • Define the goal clearly (what, how much, how soon).
  • Make it exciting and track progress.
  • Seek social support—identify helpers and role models.
  • Ensure the new goal fits harmoniously with other life priorities.

• Key Quote:

  "You will be a healthy person, but you probably also want to still be a good family member. ... How getting in good shape can be in harmony with everything else."
  — Ayelet Fishbach (14:08)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• The Willpower Misconception:

  "Willpower is nice. To have strategy is critical. To have knowledge is critical." (02:27)

• On Social Support:

  "Get the team on board, do it with others, and let people in your life know that this is what you're doing." (09:46)

• On Midpoint Slumps:

  "Until the midpoint it's often better to look back and say I have done 10, 20, 30%...and after the midpoint...look at what is left to do." (10:52)

• Learning From Slips:

  "It's absolutely expected that you will slip, so don't beat yourself over this. But it is expected also that you will learn from it." (12:48)

Important Timestamps

• Motivation predictors: 01:37–02:20
• Why willpower is overemphasized: 02:26–03:00
• Engagement matters more than importance: 03:07–03:28
• Framing goals: the need for both "why" and "how": 03:28–04:17
• Setting target numbers: 05:18–06:11
• Environment and preparation: 06:11–07:14
• Enjoyment’s role in adherence: 07:26–09:10
• Importance of social support: 09:17–10:28
• Midpoint slump strategies: 10:38–11:22
• Dealing with setbacks: 11:22–12:48
• Step-by-step for designing resolutions: 13:14–14:14
• Final takeaways: 14:51–15:41

The Three Takeaways (14:51–15:41)

1. Motivation is Knowledge:

   "You don't own your motivation. It's not something that you can lose. It's a tool. It's knowledge. It's something that we practice and constantly adjust." (14:54)

2. Set Goals You Want to Do:

   "Set goals that you look forward to doing, not just things that you wish you had already achieved. Be engaged in the process. Be intrinsically motivated." (15:07)

3. Goals Must Fit Together:

   "Your goals need to fit with each other. ... Maybe like your closet. Some goals need to be donated...Keep that goes that connect to each other, that make you the happy and fulfilled person that you wish to be next year." (15:25)

Conclusion

This science-based discussion reframes motivation from a matter of willpower to one of strategy, structure, and enjoying the process. For successful resolutions, focus on intrinsic motivation, set clear and meaningful goals, seek social support, and learn from setbacks. As Fishbach emphasizes, approach motivation with curiosity and treat each attempt as a learning opportunity.

For anyone struggling with resolutions, this episode offers evidence-based tactics and hopeful encouragement for trying again—smarter this time.