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Adam Carolla
This is live from Chester, New York. I'm joined on stage by the one and only Megyn Kelly and it's a live podcast. For those who've not heard the podcast or don't know the format. I get up there, I'll tell a couple of jokes for five minutes and then we'll bring Megan out and get some real interesting discussions with the one and only Megyn Kelly right after this. Thanks for tuning in to the Adam Carolla show. You can watch the full show on YouTube. You can just search Adam Carolla show and hit subscribe so you never miss an episode. You can also get the podcast wherever you like to listen. And for extra content, ad free episodes and more, you can head over to our substack and sign up.
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Adam Carolla
We must make a massive demo.
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Show Announcer
Live from the Sugarloaf Performing Arts center, this is the Adam Carolla Show. Adam's guest today, Megyn Kelly. And now Adam Coroll.
Adam Carolla
Thank you, Sugar Loaf. Which I always thought was just a ski resort, but it turns out it's an artisan hamlet. I'm from North Hollywood, California. There were no artisan hamlets. If I heard artisan hamlet, I'd think you were talking about a sandwich. You guys excited to see Megyn Kelly out here tonight? This guy only came here for Megyn Kelly, right? Let's call it what it is. She's like, I don't know who Alan Crapola is, but I do. I do know that foxy blonde that used to be on Fox. I'm coming out with her. All right. Seems like a good time to bring out the vivacious and lovely and thought provoking Megyn Kelly, everybody. There she is. How are you, my girl?
Megyn Kelly
Good. How you doing?
Adam Carolla
Good. I brought a drink out because they said Megan wanted a. A cocktail. So I said, I'll do a cocktail, but I don't know what happened to your cocktail.
Megyn Kelly
It's backstage someplace. That was an error.
Adam Carolla
All right, well, we'll get it.
Megyn Kelly
Some of the people in the front row have beers. I'm like, that sounds like a good idea.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. All Right, We'll. We'll get you something because I, I know you're not used to public speaking, and sometimes he tense up in front of a microphone.
Megyn Kelly
He told me I was going to have to be funny. Totally different thing. You.
Adam Carolla
You are funnier, much funnier than you think. I think I listen. No, I listen to you on, on your show quite, quite frequently. And you're certainly have a cutting sense of humor, but I think default. If you're smart and you're a little bit angry, you'll end up being funny.
Megyn Kelly
And I do find that, like, I would not have made it 20 plus years in news if I didn't have a good sense of humor. You know, you can't cover this kind of insanity all the time without being able to laugh at it. Your. Your colleagues and yourself, most importantly.
Adam Carolla
Here comes. Here comes.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, here's Abigail Finan, everybody. Yeah.
Adam Carolla
So before we get to all the news and, and all the stuff that's out there and all the stuff people are used to you commenting on, and we'll play a game called blah, blah, blah later on, which you guys will have some fun with, I think. But I was just sitting backstage and I thought, well, I mean, we can talk about politics or Don Lemon or whomever, but. And we'll get to all of it. But the one. I was thinking, like, well, it might be interesting for people. And I'm curious myself. Like, stuff like, on a little more personal level, like, you're in fantastic shape. And like, I was talking to Gutfeld earlier today, and he's like, she gets better looking as she gets older.
Megyn Kelly
I like him so much.
Adam Carolla
I know he said that. And so I thought to myself, but what is your routine? Like, I don't know if you get up and do Pilates every morning.
Megyn Kelly
So as I like to say, in another life and another body, I used to be an aerobics instructor. And that was very good because it gave me a nice base of fitness that would eventually get covered by several layers of flab, but it's still in there. So that's inspirational. Like, if you dig deep enough, you could find a little bit of it. And when I had my kids, I was pretty on the larger side for many years. And then it takes a while to lose that weight, you ladies know. And then it's just, as I got older and I got busier, I don't know, my appetite went down and I started getting thinner. And then we met Sarah. Sarah is the one who gave me all this fake hair, and she insists on making everyone Attractive. And I'm telling you, if you fall into Sarah's good graces, she can make you look like me in, like, two months.
Adam Carolla
Well, if I looked like you in two months, I'd never leave the house. Cause I'd just be standing in front of a mirror naked all day, marveling at myself. There'd be a lot of. Lot of this.
Megyn Kelly
Okay.
Show Announcer
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
So that wouldn't be productive for me.
Megyn Kelly
I think it's safe to say at 55 that the back move is not happening. You would not find any pleasure in that.
Adam Carolla
I'd try to find some, but.
Megyn Kelly
So, you know, check out my C section scar.
Adam Carolla
You know? You know, listen, you know, I'm the kind of guy who. Who will buy. When I go in looking for refrigerators or washing machines, I'll buy the one with the dent in it. You know what I mean? I'd rather have a sub zero with a dent than a whirlpool that was cherry.
Megyn Kelly
I've never felt more attractive in this moment right now.
Adam Carolla
Well, that C section is just a little dent in the sub zero, that's all. But you get a deal. They pass along. It's a better refrigerator.
Megyn Kelly
Look, I do work out with a trainer just twice a week.
Adam Carolla
Twice a week. Twice a week and all right, so first off, women hate other women who give birth and then spring back immediately. I don't know. That's a universal hatred that women have when somebody like Rihanna craps out a kid and then three weeks later she's in a bikini and all the women are like, I hate her. I want her to die.
Megyn Kelly
Yes, yes. I'm happy to tell you that did not not happen to me. It took many years. I. I actually didn't get, like, thin again until my youngest was 10. So it did take a long time. I don't. You just kind of. It's not just that you gain weight during pregnancy and then it kind of is there and you're nursing and all the stuff. It's that then, like, you're so busy when you have young kids, all you're doing is running around after the young kids all the time, and they eat nothing but delicious, terrible food for you, right? Oh, Mac and cheese and the French fries and the chicken nuggets.
Adam Carolla
Okay, so, okay. Oh, okay. All right. Don't get me started. But all right, now I'm start. I've started. Okay. Couple of things. I a. I get it. When you have kids, you're super busy. I just have to run around and tell my nanny what to do with the Kids all the time, constantly take them here and then take them there and then. Then feed them there. But the. The diet thing is the craziest part, right? Because kids are little carb incinerators, right? They're like some sort of oven that you. They're like a volcano that you can just launch carbs into, and they just evaporate. And now the pizza and pasta and pop Tarts, it's just. All they want is carbs. Pasta, yes, it just goes away. It just burns up. It just vaporizes before it ever hits the bottom of the volcano. So I had twins that were like carb machines. So I talked to a dietitian, and that guy's like, lee, you got to cut out the bread, you got to cut out the pasta, you got to go with the meats and the things and the high protein and all that. All that carnivore stuff. And I tried. God knows I tried, but my kids were like 11 at the time. And my ex wife was one of these women who couldn't put weight. Weight on no matter what. And by the way, God bless her, she's not paying for the pasta and she's not gaining weight. So it is a pasta party in my house every goddamn night. Like, imagine we had a magic wand and you're like, listen, you'll never pay for carbs again, and you'll never gain ounce. I'd be like, bring that shit on.
Megyn Kelly
Whatever cost.
Adam Carolla
Bring it on.
Megyn Kelly
Yes.
Adam Carolla
So now they're going out, and they're just going out for, you know, to the Olive Garden and, you know, bringing back piles and piles of food. And then I come home and I open the fridge, and there it is. Pasta, carb, a lunch, I call it. Just an avalanche of carbs burying me in the kitchen. And I'm like, don't do it. Except for I paid for all of it, and I don't want to throw it away. And they're not going to eat it because they already had linguini and clam sauce last night.
Megyn Kelly
You don't want to waste it.
Adam Carolla
I don't want to waste it.
Megyn Kelly
So not only do I have the car problem with the children, but my husband is a sugarholic, so that's. I never used to have dessert. Never. I was so good about avoiding desserts. I was a good, like, Italian Irish girl. I liked my carbs. I like my pastas. I like my breads. And then I married Doug. And now it's like every night there's gotta be something like some ice cream or some chocolate or whatever. And he's so disciplined other than that that he stays thin, but, you know, moment on the lips, lifetime on the hips for us gals. So I'll look at Doug and I'll be like, aren't you worried about, like, putting on a few pounds or whatever? And he just says, oh, no, I have a system. I'm like, what's your system? He says, I cut a meal out or I cut a meal in half. That's his entire diet philosophy, and it's worked for him for 55 years. He's nice and slim, he's muscular, but he has no extra fat on him. I'm like, why didn't anybody ever tell me that in my formative years, Cut a meal out or cut a meal in half?
Adam Carolla
Yeah, I couldn't follow that either, but it makes. It makes sense. It's sort of like those assholes that go, just drink on the weekends. All right, all right. Come on. Is there some injection I could get or something? Anything.
Megyn Kelly
But I know all about alcohol. It's so depressing.
Adam Carolla
I know. It's so depressing. And it's also funny when doctors go, well, listen, you can probably get away with drinking a hummingbird bird's beak worth of wine every six months. And I go, what the. No, I'm not talking about that. And then they start going, listen, if you have to have, let's say, three drinks every five weeks, that's fine. And I'm like, first of all, I had that much while you were talking to me about drinking.
Megyn Kelly
You're waiting for anything to relate to. No, I completely. And the same with the diets, right? It's like everyone wants to regulate your diet now. It's like. Like, you've got to eat Paleo, or you've got to eat keto, or you've got to eat Mediterranean. It's like, I don't want to be told. I just want to live my life. I don't want somebody to be constantly regulating what I put in my body. You really kind of get to the point where you're like, shut the fuck up. Please, I beg you.
Adam Carolla
Well, thank you. The problem is we have a bunch of experts, and they need to get paid. And back in the day, we got screwed by Covid because. Because we had a bunch of experts who needed to get paid, who were going to tell us how everything worked. But back in the day, you just had grandma, and she had something called wisdom. And we used to rely on elderly people and wisdom. Now we just make fun of old people, essentially. And we don't have. But they sort of knew. Knew it all. Like, nobody was fat back then. No one was on any of these serotonin reuptake inhibitors. No one's on pharmaceuticals. Like, I don't. When I grew up, you could open the medicine cabinet. There wasn't anything there. There was, like, chewable kids, aspirin or something. There was nothing.
Megyn Kelly
And when you opened the pantry, it was full of, like, Lucky Charms tricks. Everybody lived forever.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, well, your house. The Corollas didn't roll with the good stuff. It brought too much pleasure. It wasn't really about the calories. It was more about the enjoyment part. You know, my parents had. They took an oath that if it. If it plugs in, takes batteries or brings pleasure, then, no, not in the house.
Megyn Kelly
It's a simple oath that eliminates my entire bedside cabinet.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, that's the appletini talking, ladies and gentlemen.
Megyn Kelly
Have a cheap date.
Adam Carolla
So you work out, you have the trainer two days a week, and the.
Megyn Kelly
Diet is just only 45 minutes a session. I want that noted. It makes it more likely that I'll do it.
Adam Carolla
Oh, I totally agree. Like, you have to figure out what you'll do. And people get kind of over their skis where they're like, I'm gonna hike the John Muir trail this weekend. It's like, just do 20 minutes on the rowing machine to call the life.
Megyn Kelly
Right? It flies by. Like, cutting off that last fish. 15 makes all the difference.
Adam Carolla
I completely agree.
Megyn Kelly
I do it via Zoom. He's not even, like, in my town. I met him at the Jersey shore where we spend our summers. And I still see him now. It's been like, three years now. Twice a week. 45. It's totally doable. If you set, like, a small goal like that. It's very doable.
Adam Carolla
No, and it. And it's shrewd. And it's a good move because you don't want that guy in the house. I mean, Doug's out there. Doug's out in the yard eating Pop Tarts. And here comes this strapping young personal trainer. Next thing you know, you end up like Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, yeah. So can I tell you, this went the other way.
Adam Carolla
Cause he's got to put his hands on you because your form is bad. You know what I mean? Right?
Megyn Kelly
He's never touched me.
Adam Carolla
Well, via zoom. Wait till he gets in the house. It's gonna be a touch fest. Doug knows. I talked to him about it back.
Megyn Kelly
Backstage when we were pregnant with our first child. We interviewed nannies and we almost hired the former Ms. Main. Now that probably wasn't a good idea.
Adam Carolla
No, right.
Megyn Kelly
I mean, like, there's being like, my friends are like, are you that confident? I am like, no, she did not come into our house. There was no reason to.
Adam Carolla
Well, first off, nanny's not even a job. It's just a way to meet beat dudes with money. It's not.
Megyn Kelly
That is so true. It's never occurred to me, but you're so right.
Adam Carolla
We're all nannies. Just, there's the kid. Don't let him catch on fire. Make him some instant oatmeal. You're an expert. I was talking about this today because I was thinking about Tiger woods and his first wife, Elon, whatever her name.
Megyn Kelly
Remember, Remember that Swedish gal?
Adam Carolla
Swedish. She was a nanny.
Megyn Kelly
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
Does anyone we. Maybe we can find a picture of her. I don't know, but did fair. Did you see what she looked like at 23 and a half? Would you let that into your house?
Megyn Kelly
Hell no. Oh, hell no.
Adam Carolla
Like you're upstairs icing your stretch marks and she's wild. She's wearing a tennis skirt walking through the house.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, my God.
Adam Carolla
It's for letting that in your house.
Megyn Kelly
Trying to get rid of him.
Adam Carolla
No, it didn't even. Even Schwarzenegger got down to his. Eventually, you know, the key. He's like, look, now he's with.
Megyn Kelly
Now he's with Vanessa Trump. Oh, he and Don Jr's ex are together.
Adam Carolla
Wait a minute. Yeah, wait a minute. Arnold.
Megyn Kelly
No, no, Tiger. Yeah, yeah. Tiger.
Adam Carolla
Wait, who's with who?
Megyn Kelly
Tiger Woods.
Adam Carolla
Tiger Woods. Oh, Tiger Woods. Right.
Megyn Kelly
Beautiful Swedish gal.
Adam Carolla
Right?
Megyn Kelly
And then that ended in ruination and despair, as we all saw on the COVID of People magazine.
Adam Carolla
Right?
Megyn Kelly
And right now he's with. Seriously, like been for a while. With Vanessa Trump, Don Jr's ex wife.
Adam Carolla
Right. That is. That is.
Megyn Kelly
Which means Don and Vanessa are never ever getting back together.
Adam Carolla
All right. Right.
Megyn Kelly
You know what they say.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, my God, I've had like two sips of this.
Adam Carolla
I know. Yeah. So she was the best looking blonde. I mean, I don't know, second only to Megyn Kelly, obviously, but she's a stunningly beautiful woman in staying, sleeping in your house, you know? And listen, I had. I had a nanny and it would. You would be in situations. I mean, not me. Stupid, cheap parents wouldn't get me a nanny. But we didn't need nannies. People we raised ourselves, they didn't take care of us.
Megyn Kelly
In the 70s.
Adam Carolla
I had a Nanny for my kids. And there were plenty of times when my wife would be out for the night or out of town or something, and you're like, sitting, watch. Sitting. Watching TV with the kids. And, like, the kids go to bed and you're just like, sitting there, you know?
Megyn Kelly
This is dangerous.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, can be. And like I said, even if she's not that aesthetically pleasing, the guy will eventually come around. Like, Schwarzenegger's pirate maid lady was not aesthetically stunning, but. But eventually, you know, Arnold came around.
Megyn Kelly
After enough drinks.
Adam Carolla
Yes, after enough drinks.
Megyn Kelly
Well, we actually did wind up with a stunning nanny. She was from Brazil, speaking of Giselle. And there were a couple summers there when my kids were really little where I was working at Fox and I had to stay in New York during the work week. So Monday through Thursday, I would be in New York and Doug would take the kids and we go to the Jersey shore, like I said. And he would spend those, you know, the whole summer down there with them. And I would go on Thursday nights through Sunday nights or Monday mornings. Anyway, the nanny, the Brazilian nanny was there, and she was great. She was totally appropriate. Nothing untoward at all. But you know, those Brazilians, they do not wear much to the beach. And so Doug would be, like, pushing the enormous cart with, like, all the toys and, like, the three kids everywhere. And beautiful Noelle would be there in her, like, teeny, tiny little thong bikini. And Doug would be like, meg, can you please talk to her? He did not want to discuss the dog, but she's Brazilian. That's how they dress and they pull it off. Well, I mean, not literally. We would have gotten rid of her.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, Doug pulled that off with his teeth. I have a theory about the Brazilians and the thong back. I have figured out that their shade is the perfect ass color. It's the perfect tint for ass.
Megyn Kelly
So true.
Adam Carolla
There's. There's Irish ass. That's just. Oh, man, you're reflecting the sun, Molly. Let me put my sunglasses on. And then there's very dark, very black, which just absorbs everything around it and it doesn't really bounce the light off.
Megyn Kelly
And black people have the best fat.
Adam Carolla
They have the best fat.
Megyn Kelly
The weird dimpley fat. They have nice, round, hard fat.
Adam Carolla
They have great fat.
Megyn Kelly
Very jealous of the black fat.
Adam Carolla
No, they have wonderful fat. But then there is the Brazilian, which is that caramel colored mocha e. It's perfect ash shade color. And so somebody over there just went, look, if we have the perfect shade of. Of ass color, we should invent Something called a thong back. Why would we wear board shorts and cover up this gift? You know what I mean? So I think they've given it a lot of thought. Some just, you know, during my downtime, looking at the computer and whatnot.
Megyn Kelly
I mean, I'm not gonna lie. I've had this conversation. We talked about how, like, when you're looking at, like a Brazilian woman lying on the beach, beach, you could bounce a quarter off her ass. Whereas you look at the Irish gals and it's more like, where's my quarter? I think most of us can sort of relate to point B more. What happened to my quarter?
Adam Carolla
So you had a good looking Brazilian, but it worked out.
Megyn Kelly
It worked out beautifully. Yeah.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Megyn Kelly
Brazilians are also very, very loving people, by the way, I hear. I mean, I wouldn't report it on my show as news, but I hear from a somewhat reliable source that the reason Giselle and Tom Brady broke up is because Brazilian women are very much like their homemakers. They're very loving. She wanted him to stay home and to be with her. And Tom Brady wanted to be out partying all the time with his buds and at the clubs, which is, by the way, what he's been doing ever since. Since they broke up. And it just leads you to ask, if you can't keep your man at home as Gisele Bundchen, what hope is there for any woman?
Adam Carolla
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Show Announcer
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Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
I think what happens, and this has probably happened to the best of us, you get hold of the supermodel, and she's a Brazilian supermodel. First off, where she's from, they don't even have real football. They have soccer. They kick the football around. And then she's sitting there talking with her thick accent about some sort of modeling thing. And at some point he realizes, oh, I have to talk to her. Like, we're sitting around like, I. I want to get up on the chalkboard and draw out some X's and some O's. And we're just talking about what's the best way, you know, the best wax and the best ass cream, you know, if you're Brazilian and things like that. And then he just wanted. Wanted to get out of there, but her thing, like, they were like, he. She wants him at home and she wants him to retire from football. Right?
Megyn Kelly
Right.
Adam Carolla
Football is four or five months out of the year, and you get paid millions of dollars. And then there's an off season. Like, he could have swung that. Right.
Megyn Kelly
What do you make of his, like, $400 million contract with Fox to announce the games? Do you guys like Tom Brady's announcing? Okay, it's like 50. 50.
Adam Carolla
I look, here's what. Here's what happened. Here's what happened. And it. It's like a little bit. It's kind of a Napoleon complex. But he's not short, so this is different. This is basically somebody told him when he was like, 21 and a half, you're not going to make it. You're not good enough. You're not fast enough. You don't have the arm strength. And his entire world just became, I'm going to prove you wrong. And that just bleeds into everything he does. Like, there's every single thing is. They said I couldn't. I'm going to, you know, I'm going to do it. And it's such a weird. It's the athletes mentality. Like, every single time the Patriots would win a Super bowl, they'd go back into the locker room and they'd be like, nobody but the people in this locker room thought we could win this game. Everybody said, it's like you're seven and a half point favorites. What are you talking about? Everyone thought you wouldn't. She went 14 and three that season. Like, everyone thought you were going to win the Super Bowl. What do you mean? Nobody outside. So they have to create this, like, mentality. It's like us against the world. Nobody thinks he can do this. No one thought he could play football. Now no one thinks he can announce. Megyn Kelly doesn't think he can announce. He's going to show her.
Megyn Kelly
I never really had thoughts about him at all other than, how could you leave Gisele Bundchen? I mean, that's really my, I'm not really a sports person person, as you may know. But I will tell you, that mentality is what we had at Fox News too. Even when we were number one. I mean, they're still number one. We'd become number one. We were crushing everybody. We never even looked at CNN's or MSNBC's ratings. We only looked internally to see like it was me versus O'Reilly or me versus Hannity, me versus Greta. And we still had that underdog mentality because Roger really thought that was important to like, create a bunch of scrappy go for it reporters. And we'd show up at the field, like, there'd be a massive, you know, news story, God forbid, like a mass shooting kind of thing. And you'd go out there with Fox, you'd have maybe four people there, like four bookers. And you'd show up to CNN, they'd have like 20. I mean, even to this day, when I was there, Anderson Cooper had 100 people on his 8 o' clock show. That was also watched, coincidentally, by just 100 people.
Adam Carolla
Same people.
Megyn Kelly
It was amazing that that business model failed. And Fox News on the Kelly file, I had 12, 12 staffers.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, it's interesting. But it's also interesting the makeup of the people who sort of compete. Like, if you ever talk to Sylvester Stallone and none of you will, well, let's be realistic. He's an Important man. Time is limited. And. Okay, that's not. I'm not here to judge, but statistically, no one's going to talk to Salam. Except for me, obviously. Now, he. I remember once I just started talking to him. He was punching his one hand with the other. You know, makes a fist and he punches. And he was like, he felt slighted and overlooked, and they were dismissive. And that's Ben Affleck thinks he's so good. You know what I mean? I'm the one who, you know, and I realized everybody feels marginalized and, like, not good enough. And like, when you would sit around and think about a Stallone, you just go, that guy. I mean, the guy's driving a Lamborghini and smoking a cigar and everyone loves him and stuff like that. No, no, he's, like, insecure. Feels like. Like he's gotten short shrift and everything else, just like everyone else.
Megyn Kelly
It's like the Tanya Harding thing. Remember? Did you see that movie? I. Tonya. And the mother knew exactly what she needed to inspire her to skate well. And it wasn't like, you can do this, honey. Good luck. I believe in you. It was. You suck. You'll be the worst one out there, right? Allison Janney would smoke her cigarette, you know, like. And honestly, like, my daughter is like that, too, but I don't have the heart to be the full Tonya Harding mother. So I'll just be like, have fun. Like, there's nothing encouraging about, like, her performance, just sort of a medium. Enjoy yourself.
Adam Carolla
Are your kids excelling at things?
Megyn Kelly
Well, they love tennis. They're big tennis players. Unlike their mom, I play no tennis, but my husband loves tennis. And my daughter's big into theater. She's like. She gets up on stage and is a thespian, which is fun to watch. I am such a sucker. I don't know if you guys have kids, kids who have ever been in a school play, but I mean, literally, as soon as they raise the curtain, I cry. It doesn't take anything. It doesn't take anything special. I'm already in tears. Like, I well up. We watched Mr. Holland's opus the other night. I cried 10 times. I can't handle things like that, like coming of age films or like, at the end when he gets his just desserts and, like, they honor him. I really can't handle that shit. I can watch, like, the worst absolute things on the news without actually breaking down, but you show me, like, a puppy in trouble and it's over.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, women mostly love pets more than men. I've figured out they're very loyal. If you said to women, like most women, you went like, oh, plane crash in the Andes and the entire soccer team from Brazil perished in the crash. And a puppy, they'd go, oh, like, like, literally.
Megyn Kelly
It's so true. I can, I can and have listened to every Dateline they've ever made for relaxation. Like to fall asleep.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Megyn Kelly
Is anybody else like this? Right. It's relaxing somehow. I don't know. But, like, if I'm scrolling Twitter and I see anything about animal abuse, I'm. I'm texting Elon Musk. Like, this must come down. You can't just put this on us.
Adam Carolla
Well, women love cold cases, you know, and solving crime. I think they've turned it from like murder to fraud now. I think, I think everyone's just going to become like a sleuth. Women kind of, interestingly enough, do the murder and the, you know, the date liney stuff. Guys are turning toward like Somalian daycare and stuff like, stuff like that. But I think ultimately it's always funny when you see real police work, because in those movies with like the TV shows, like, you know, Kentucky Blue with Donnie Wahlberg, you know what I mean? And they're like on the phone going, we don't have time for backup. You know everybody. When you watch Dateline, it's always like, the case went cold and this sheriff, the Dade County Sheriff Department stopped working on it. And then one day the phone rang 30 years later, and it was some woman who done all the work you were supposed to be doing, by the way, while you were getting paid. She did it for free in her goddamn kitchen. All right, that is so true. And then the phone rang. It's like, oh, that's not policing at all. There's a fat guy sitting at his desk and the phone rang. There's no hour long cop drama where the phone rang and told you what happened with the cold case.
Megyn Kelly
No, it's so true. Andrew Schultz tells the story about how his wife is super into true crime, just like I am. And now she watches an NFL football game and sees like a compound fracture. And she's like, when is someone going to murder him? You do become immune to the really gross stuff.
Adam Carolla
Yes. And it is kind of interesting where we're all at and, like, what upsets us and what doesn't upset us and how that, how that works. Like, it's kind of a weird yuck factor thing.
Megyn Kelly
Does anything upset you?
Adam Carolla
I, I do not like seeing injuries or people you Know, hurt by, you know, run over by trains or anything.
Megyn Kelly
You're so unique in that.
Adam Carolla
I, I, I hate I I people.
Megyn Kelly
Run over by trains. We were just googling that before we came out, weren't we?
Adam Carolla
Yes. No, there was that, well, you guys don't know it, but there was that whole Faces of Death videos that used to come out and they'd run the commercials at night and they.
Megyn Kelly
What are you talking about? How do you all know this reference?
Adam Carolla
You guys know it. We're not with our Pilates instructor and our ivory towers. We live amongst the people.
Megyn Kelly
Wait a minute.
Adam Carolla
This is an artisan Hamlet, okay?
Megyn Kelly
We grew up the same. What is the basic thing?
Adam Carolla
We did not grow up the same. There's no way your parents didn't love you like my parents didn't love me. There's no way. Don't even get into that. Say that right now. There was a whole. The guy David France or whatever it is. The guy who invented Girls Gone Wild, now that I know France was his name Francis.
Megyn Kelly
Okay, the girls got it at the ready.
Adam Carolla
The Girls Gone Wild guy before that did the death tapes. And the death tapes would be like footage. Half the stuff came out of somewhere in Europe or something like that. And it would show like a woman going, oh, I can run a. And the train took her out or you know, a gourd by a bullhorn or something like that. Like it was all this death. And you'd Send away for 10 tapes to.
Megyn Kelly
This woman right here is hysterical. She's got it on replay right now at home.
Adam Carolla
But listen, you would much rather, wouldn't you rather find in your teenage son's room the cassettes for Girls Gone Wild versus Killed by a Train?
Megyn Kelly
Oh yeah.
Adam Carolla
Like I'd be like, this kid needs therapy.
Megyn Kelly
Oh no. I had a good friend who called me. She was all upset because her son had attempted to sext with his. With a girl. And you know, like he was like, hey, why don't you send me a picture? And she didn't. But he gave it the old college try. And what are you upset about? Like he's a red blooded American boy. Like that's she, he didn't get it. No one got hurt. It's not a great practice. You intervene in time.
Adam Carolla
He's a healthy nine year old. Perfectly.
Megyn Kelly
There was no like furry involved, you know, I'm so thrilled that it's like a normal red blooded American heterosexual boy.
Adam Carolla
It is, it is kind of a weird conceit where it's like he's trying to see A young lady naked. Well, what are the alternatives? I mean, let's really explore the alternatives. I want to see an old dude naked. Not fantastic.
Megyn Kelly
A teacher.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. I want to see nobody naked ever. That's a. Its own problem over there. Like, what. What is. There's. You're going to need to see somebody naked.
Megyn Kelly
You are. You are that.
Adam Carolla
Those are the rules. So this is about the best version of that, right?
Megyn Kelly
Yes. Like, I don't know. I mean, it's. It's a great moment when you realize that you're raising two, like. And it's nothing against the homosexual community, a lot of gay friends, but just two normal. Three normal heterosexual kids who. They're not into furries. They're not into chorus, you know, I.
Adam Carolla
Don'T know what chorus is. I have a lot of black gay friends, so I can say what I want, too. Now, I like to cover everybody. So here's an interesting question for you as a woman, because I don't know how to answer this question. Let's just say you're a man and I'll kind of put it out there. Now, I have a friend, and he likes the MILF stuff. He likes older ladies, you know, so.
Megyn Kelly
Define older.
Adam Carolla
Well, first off, it's really what's in your heart. And then also your driver's license. It's kind of somewhere between your heart and your driver's license in terms of your actual age.
Megyn Kelly
Okay.
Adam Carolla
You know what I mean?
Megyn Kelly
Okay. All right. I accept that you got a young heart. Yeah, sure.
Adam Carolla
License is a little older.
Megyn Kelly
I don't know whose that is.
Adam Carolla
I've seen the license. Okay. The point is this. He. Here. Here's what I'm getting. Here's what I'm getting at. He likes women who basically look like his wife because his wife's a little bit older. So if she ever catches him scrolling around on the Internet, she's going to see that he's basically felt fantasizing to someone who kind of resembles her.
Megyn Kelly
Okay.
Adam Carolla
Which to me is better than, you know, black and bodacious or something. You know what I mean? Like, it's the opposite of you, you.
Megyn Kelly
Know, that would be a shock.
Adam Carolla
Well, people can go, that's a fantasy or whatever, but wouldn't you like this person, let's just say, with Doug or anybody's husband, Wouldn't it be better if you caught them looking at some version of you?
Megyn Kelly
I don't know, because that's like gettable, you know, like, might be better to have like the 21 year old who he's not gonna get right. All right, But I'll say as long as it was a woman, I'd be fine.
Adam Carolla
Like, okay, all right.
Megyn Kelly
I have a friend who.
Adam Carolla
Hold on.
Show Announcer
I got out.
Adam Carolla
I got some bad news about Doug. I was checking this.
Megyn Kelly
You're gonna do a cross country over to her. Adam, he'd be. He'd be up there.
Adam Carolla
Search history before we hit the stage and we'll talk after the show. Yeah, go ahead.
Megyn Kelly
But I have a friend who discovered that the husband was secretly having sex with men. And like, that would be. That would be such a world rocker. You would never trust anybody again. So as long as it was like a woman, I don't know, I guess. I guess I could accept it. I don't think it's a thing for. In my relationship, I've never. I've never caught that or been aware of that.
Adam Carolla
I mean, is there such a thing? And I will say no. As a guy, I think women think that men can be fluid. Like, they are like sort of, you know, every woman is like, well, I had a roommate in college and, you know, why not, you know, one time, whatever, we had a few Zimas and one thing led to another and, you know, I'm timestamping it, you know, but there is no version of that with guys. There could be no such thing. If you find gay porn on your guy's phone or computer or something, that's it.
Megyn Kelly
He's gay, he's gay. There's no such thing as bi. Do we agree?
Adam Carolla
I agree. I.
Megyn Kelly
You're having sex with men. As a man, you're gay.
Adam Carolla
Here's what I always say. Bi is gay with a publicist. Bi is like when you're Elton John and you're like, well, I don't really want everyone to think I'm totally gay, so I'll just be bi for a while and guys will find that interesting and lo and behold, I'll be married to a dude five years from now. Do not worry. So bi doesn't really exist. Well, it does. You're saying bye bye to heterosexuality. Bye, see ya. Hello to homo. Here we go. Bye bye heterosexuality.
Megyn Kelly
I agree. And my friend stayed with him. She really stayed with the man. He promised he wouldn't do it. I mean, come on. Of course this isn't real. Can I be honest? I've had this happen to more than one friend of mine.
Adam Carolla
Really?
Megyn Kelly
Yes. I don't like. Why wouldn't a gay man just be gay in today's day and age? Why would you marry A woman and pretend. Pretend that you're hetero. You know, it's going to come out eventually.
Adam Carolla
I. I have this thing. Well, guys can be unrealistic for extended periods of time. Like guys can. Guys can have like a 12 pound goiter in their neck and go, I'm not going to the goddamn doctor. This going to those saw bones and try to rip you off the goddamn Obama care. That's some right there. Like, guys can push things off for long periods of time and tend to lie to themselves. And maybe there's a version where they figured that somehow if they married the right woman, it would pull them into heterosexuality.
Megyn Kelly
Okay, all right. You know, it's like a noble ideal.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. I think a lot of guys would go straight for you.
Megyn Kelly
No, don't bother.
Adam Carolla
I'm good.
Megyn Kelly
I'll stay with the truly straight ones. I just feel like that would be so devastating to be absolutely in love with a man as a woman, only to find out.
Adam Carolla
But isn't it better than them having an affair with one of your friends? Because this.
Megyn Kelly
No, no, no. Look, every woman is agreeing. No, we would take the affair with a friend 10 times out of 10.
Adam Carolla
Because that just means they found another woman who they're more attracted to than you.
Megyn Kelly
They're not more attracted to her than they are to us. We just need to try harder. It's just a reminder. We need to try a little harder. We've let ourselves go.
Adam Carolla
We've gotten a little. You're right. It's your fault. I mean, I like where this is heading.
Megyn Kelly
I am very.
Adam Carolla
Keep going.
Megyn Kelly
I'm very much in the field of personal responsibility on this. Has anybody read the new book Stranger by Belle Burden? You guys gotta read this. So it's been profiled everywhere. So this woman, she's a socialite in New York. And the whole book is about how her husband cheated on her and left her. He up and left her. He was a hedge fund manager. They were both, you know, successful lawyers. Anyway, she said they had this happy marriage for 21 years, and one day she found out he was having an affair. And he said, she means nothing to me. It's over. Forget it. And the next morning, he left with his suitcase, saying, I'm leaving you. I'm not happy. And he went to be with the other woman. She was flabbergasted. He said, you can have the kids. You can have our home in New York and have our home on Martha's Vineyard. And then she spent the next several years asking herself, like, what the hell just Happened.
Adam Carolla
Happen.
Megyn Kelly
And I read this thing and I know I was supposed to feel like the husband was a complete douchebag, which he was, but all I could really think was you had a hand in this. There's no way the guy left after 21 years, after you were this perfect spouse. You were, you were trying to convince us you were in the pages of this book. And then the more you read, you realize, okay, she talks about how she let herself go and she talks about how she was painfully socially awkward and he couldn't have broke her to, to any social event. So she wasn't socially fun and she was kind of bored being a stay at home mom. She didn't enjoy it. Some women do, but she didn't. She was disgruntled. So it's like, okay, so you were boring, you were disgruntled, you let yourself go, right? They didn't have much of a sex life. She also talks about, if he's not having sex with you, I'm going to get it someplace else.
Adam Carolla
No, I like where your head's at, my lady. And by the way, I'm almost. No, never disgruntled, but I'm always just sort of gruntled, you know what I mean? I'm not, not totally disgruntled, but I'm in a kind of gruntal phase. Normally I, I listen. We as a society have done an injustice to women by sort of saying to them, you don't do anything. You don't have to look a certain way. You don't have to keep him happy. You're not here to keep him happy.
Show Announcer
You're not here.
Adam Carolla
You're here to explore your possibilities and your potentials and everything.
Megyn Kelly
It's all about you.
Adam Carolla
And it's all about you. And you don't. And it's not been helpful. And it's, and because it's like, it's kind of a two way street. You know, there's things women do, they're things men do. A relationship is kind of a yin and a yang and there's, there's a job for everybody, like under, under this roof and a little internalizing. Like. Yeah, it's like when people, when you don't get invited to a party, you can get angry at the person who didn't invite you, which most people do. Or you can find a mirror and go, why didn't I get invited to this party?
Megyn Kelly
Like, or you can do what I do, which is say, thank God I didn't get invited to that party. I never have fomo. I Only have Jomo.
Adam Carolla
I feel the same way about weddings. Like people like, I can't believe I didn't get invited. Yes, yes. You didn't have to buy someone a toaster oven and you didn't have to go to Boca Raton. This is win win, right? This is win win. But yeah, a little self examination. I mean, I remember it. I remember really well when my daughter. The only real piece of decent parenting I've probably ever done is this is one. One time instance. There's a one instance, one fleeting instance when my daughter was about 10 years old and she came home from volleyball tryouts. And she said, I didn't make the team. And I said, why? Why not? In your estimation? Why not? And she said, because the coach doesn't like her. Me. And I said, all right, well, I'm going to have to be a dad for like 12 seconds, then I can get back to SportsCenter, but let's see if I can do this dad thing here for a second. So I said, I don't think it's the coach, but tell me why you think. Well, the coach doesn't like me. I said, okay, let's do this little experiment. How many people tried out for the team? Said, 20 girls. I said, how many people were selected? She said, 10 girls. I go, if I was just up a person up on the stands up in the bleachers watching you guys try out, where would I place you in those 20 girls? And they took 10 only. And she said, probably nine or 10. And I said, well, that's pretty close to the, to the cutoff. So isn't it possible that maybe you just could have done a little better at the tryout? And also, this was a funny thing. My ex wife at the time walked by right when my daughter said I'd be like 9 or 10. And she went, you give yourself a 9 or a 10, that's excellent. And she kept walking. And I realized women like to float in and out of conversations, make erroneous comments, and then leave. Again, my thing, ladies, you either get in the conversation or you stay the fuck out of the conversation. You can't. Don't give me a crop dusting with your bad ideas where you just walk past my conversations and judge them on the way to another conversation you're not really in. Yeah, a little misunderstanding, a little bullshit, and then off to the kitchen. It's in or out with the conversation, ladies. So I said to my daughter, I said, well, so if someone's watching up there and they're seeing that you're not 9 or 10 and they're only taking 10. That isn't it conceivable that you may have just missed the cut? And she was like, yeah, okay. Like I, she got it. Because I, one thing I won't tolerate is the teacher hates me or the coach hates me and then later on the cops hate me and my boss hates me.
Megyn Kelly
But why, like, what if, what if it's true?
Adam Carolla
Oh, her coach hated her. She told me later. She said, natalia's a bitch and I don't want her associated with any team I'm coaching.
Megyn Kelly
Wow.
Adam Carolla
Oh, yeah. She's very, very strident. The other thing that's weird that kids, kids think they have options today. Like then later on, my daughter got into high school and she was good at volleyball and then it was like her senior year and I said, I said, you're going out for the volleyball team? She's like, nah. I go, why not? I don't get it. Coach is mean. I go, all coaches are mean. That's what they do.
Megyn Kelly
That's what you're buying into.
Adam Carolla
That's their job. They're like sea captains. You know what I mean? Like, they're supposed to be mean. You know, don't want to deal with it.
Megyn Kelly
I mean, we, we're having that somewhat in our family now because after Charlie Kirk died, our two oldest we have, our kids are 16, 14 and 12. Boy, girl, boy. Our two oldest formed a turning point chapter at their school.
Adam Carolla
Oh, wow.
Megyn Kelly
Yeah, nice. Right on. And they're at all boys and all girls Harry's.
Adam Carolla
It's 2026 and your phone's now a supercomputer. Your car parks itself, but your razor is still the same old flimsy crap from 08. Well, that's where Harry's plus comes in. The first time I used it, I couldn't believe how smooth the shave was. It's designed with progressive blades for less tug and less pull. And it's affordable too. Harry's owns their own world class blade factory in Germany. No outsourcing, no middlemen. Harry's launched their most advanced razor ever and it's still cheaper than the Gillette Fusion 5. It's Harry's, right, Dawson?
Show Announcer
For a limited time, our listeners can get the Harry's plus trial set for only $10 at Harrys.com Adam this set includes the all new Harry's plus razor, one refined five blade cartridge, a two ounce foaming shave gel, and a travel cover to protect your blades on the go. Just head to Harrys.com Adam to claim this offer. And after you purchase, they'll ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them we sent you.
Adam Carolla
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Show Announcer
Dawson, go to brelohealth.com today to see if you qualify. Use the promo code Adam at checkout to get your first three months for $133 per month. That's brellohealth.com and promo code Adam. All patients must meet with a healthcare provider prior to any medication being prescribed or dispensed. Any medications ultimately dispensed to a patient will be done pursuant to a valid prescription from healthcare provider. Compounded drug products are not FDA approved. FDA does not evaluate compounded products for safety, effectiveness or quality. Compounded medications are not reviewed or verified by the FDA for safety, effectiveness or quality and are not FDA approved. Not available in all 50 states.
Megyn Kelly
Actually. Quite cool about it. They were like, it's great. Let us help you. You know, might need to call it Young Conservatives club for various, like charter reasons. But we got you. You're good. And at the young at the girls school, they were crying in the hallways. And I refer of course to the teachers.
Adam Carolla
Right, right.
Megyn Kelly
It was crazy. But in the end I was like, this is actually very good for my daughter. Very good. You should learn early what it means to declare yourself a conservative.
Adam Carolla
They are so, so much happier when they're conservative. My daughter, my son who's really essentially like me, so he can't really be swayed with semi retarded ideas and he doesn't.
Megyn Kelly
You're not allowed to say retarded.
Adam Carolla
Oh, okay. I said semi retarded. Isn't that better? That's really only half tart if you think about it. You never go full time. My son doesn't care about what people think about him, but my daughter, like, really does. Like young girls especially. They want acceptance and they want to get in the popular girls club.
Megyn Kelly
It's biological.
Adam Carolla
It's Biological. It's absolutely biological. And there was a time when she was like listening to rap music and down with Black Lives Matter and she didn't to listen like any of it. She was just trying to fit in. And I noticed it with all her friends and stuff like that. And then at some point her and her friends got into country music and like conservative stuff and you know, all, all the folks we know and all the stuff we listen to and all the stuff we like. And she was immediately happier. Like, I mean, because first off she didn't have the weight of the world on her. Like, imagine being tasked with having to fix everything. Like not only do you have to fix the black community, but we have a president who's Hitlerian and he's put a target on your back and jackbooted thugs are coming to your home and kicking open the door and looking for people who look different than them. And then the environment's gone to shit. We have four years before everyone's floating in the ocean in a giant plastic island the size of Texas. And like, imagine walking around as a 15 year old girl just going, I mean there should be a class action lawsuit against Al gore. Because every 14 year old who had to hear that busted up old idiot talk about we got four years left, Like I'm doing the math, you know what I mean?
Megyn Kelly
Meanwhile you look over on Team Conservative and it's like, our taxes are low and the border's closed. Good times.
Adam Carolla
And I remember because I had a hippie mom who bought into all this in the 70s, but we didn't call it global warming or climate change. It was called ecology, you know, and there was like going to be ice age and stuff like that. But I distinctly remember waiting in gas lines when they were rationing gas, opec, you know, odd, even license plates, you know, this kind of stuff way back, way back. And I remember like with my stupid hippie mom and I was like nine and she's like, we're going to be out of gas in about 15 minutes. Like there are. And I'm like, I want to do donuts in a parking lot with something with a Hemi in it. She's like, there's not going to be any. And I remember being really bummed out, right? Like I'm 10 going, I love cars. I got all these hot Wheels. I want myself a super souped up car. I want a race car. And it's like, no, be none of that because we're going to be out of fuel by the time you're in High school. And it was. It was depressing.
Megyn Kelly
You know, this is exactly the way I felt about sun in the hair stuff. Yes. Yes. Right? Yes.
Adam Carolla
Wait, I mean, what. I'm not gay. What are you about?
Show Announcer
Talking.
Megyn Kelly
Talking about desperate to be blonde as a young girl. Anything you put it. And it always went red. It never went blonde. Just like the self tanner always went orange. We were orange and red, but we thought we were hot.
Adam Carolla
There would. You would put lemon in your hair, right?
Megyn Kelly
I never put lemon in. I only did the sun in. I did do the tanning beds, which would get you genuinely bronze and very cancery.
Adam Carolla
Right?
Megyn Kelly
We don't. We all did it.
Adam Carolla
But what about this? So what. What was your hair color in high school if we just left it alone completely?
Megyn Kelly
It was like my eyebrows. It was like a dark blonde. Okay, yeah. So always blonde but darker and like maybe a little auburn in there.
Adam Carolla
Okay. I didn't need three colors because it's a light brown.
Megyn Kelly
Just saying God wasn't totally unfair.
Adam Carolla
Shows only an hour and 40 minutes.
Megyn Kelly
Megan. In the summer, there'd be a tinge of blonde at the ends.
Adam Carolla
Hints of lavender floated in the air.
Megyn Kelly
Like prel.
Adam Carolla
I wanted brell. I. I want to. I want it. So I have.
Megyn Kelly
I.
Adam Carolla
So my theory that. That people don't all sign off on is I. I genuinely think that most things are kind of bad for you. You, like when you mess with your flora and fauna. Like, you. You start. Like, the reason everyone has gut problems is because they're taking too much gut stuff. You know what I mean? And they go, I need some Tums and some Pepsi. They see and some Mylanta and blah, blah, blah. And I'm going, you're taking too much stuff. And you were meant to sort of like, nature knew what it was doing. Like, you're not supposed to be scrubbing and sterilizing and prowling. Like, okay, I grew up like a raccoon in a dumpster, and now every kid bathes in Purell and they all have peanut allergies and they all have lactose intolerant. Like, everyone's got an allergy. Everyone's got a thing. No one I grew up with had any allergies or any allergic to anything or anything right now. So. Meaning sort of nature knows what it's doing. Essentially. The latest one that I'm. I think we're gonna find out was a bad idea. And by the way, we had ideas. We had the food pyramid. It was upside down, you know, with 28 servings of grains and rice every morning. And, like, one cube of beef every six years.
Megyn Kelly
You know, parents knew what they were doing with that.
Adam Carolla
Right? So we've been wrong. We just got done with. With COVID We're wrong about everything with COVID Right. Okay, the next one. Thank you.
Megyn Kelly
Literally everything.
Adam Carolla
Thank you, patriots. The next one we're going to be wrong about is sunscreen.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, yeah, that's already happening.
Adam Carolla
Remember 10 years ago, 20 years ago, dermatologists were like, if you got to go out to the mailbox in the morning, you got to put your sunscreen put on the top of your hands, right? I was like, I'm going to get the penny saver. It's 40ft away. It's 7:45 in the morning. I have to put a poncho on. You got to put sunscreen on before you leave the house. Whoa. Oh, what. What about this? However. However many ounces you are, take your weight. I'm 202 pounds. Convert that into ounces and then drink that much water before you get in the car every single day. Right? Okay. So that we wanted us chugging water and piling on sunscreen. And then every kid, we got this sprayable stuff. It's just weird aluminum, sodium dioxide or something like, close your eyes, Timmy.
Megyn Kelly
For your health.
Adam Carolla
Living in a toxic cloud of sunscreen. They're breathing it in. Every. Every kid who. Everybody who turns 50 who was 10, 10 years ago is going to have a syndrome called, called white lung, where they just ingested way too much sunscreen. And by the way, skin cancer's gone up 2,000% in, like, the last 10 years. Like, we're not meant for the sunscreen.
Megyn Kelly
I. I have another one for you. I. I actually do think. And he was mocked for this, but he was right. Fluoride toothpaste.
Adam Carolla
Oh, right. Yeah.
Megyn Kelly
By the way, I tried so many to find, like, I don't like toms. You just try to go non fluoride, and it's pretty gross. The options. But the native brand, they make a nice. They make a nice non fluoride toothpaste, but it's not enough because fluoride is a neurotoxin, and you actually don't need it in order to keep good teeth or avoid cavities at all. You just have to be a good brusher. And if you go to the dentist now for your cleaning and, you know, as you get older, they want you to go, like, two times a year, then they want to soak you your teeth in fluoride at the end of it, it's like, truly soaking in asbestos as your parting gift, you have to say no to that. But that's another one that everybody does that's really not great.
Adam Carolla
I don't know if we have any dentists here tonight, but in terms of dentist etiquette, I would ask that you not engage in this, which is. I went to a dentist once years ago. The guy looked in my mouth, and he says, do you dip?
Megyn Kelly
Oh, no.
Adam Carolla
I said, what? Do you chew tobacco? I go, no. And he goes, oh, okay. All right. First off, it's not good. You handed me a clipboard with questions on it before I got in here. You could have just had me check that box. But no, but wow. Whatever you're looking. And I had a tough. I had a tooth that was screwed up or whatever, and the guy's, like, looking at my mouth, and he goes, oh, man. Oh, this isn't good. And he goes, how long's this been going on? I go, it's got spin, like a year. And he goes, you have a really high tolerance for pain, don't you? And I was like, what are you looking at?
Megyn Kelly
And then he said, how long has that goiter been there?
Adam Carolla
Yeah. Damn Obamacare.
Megyn Kelly
So I. I have a dentist who is relatively new to me. We moved from the city to Connecticut in 2021, and I decided it might be fun to do Invisalign. By the way, I'm sorry, but highly recommend Invisalign.
Adam Carolla
Invisalign.
Megyn Kelly
My teeth weren't really crooked. My bottom teeth were slightly crooked.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Megyn Kelly
Okay. I never had braces, but I'm like, oh, I'm gonna try.
Adam Carolla
I like the crooked teeth on you. That's the dent in the Sub Zero refrigerator.
Megyn Kelly
But I've got it, so.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, little discount there. Gentlemen. You didn't think you could step up to Sub Zero? You can. This one's got a dent.
Megyn Kelly
The Invisalign gives you, like, a Suzy Chapstick smile. Like, it changes your whole Susie Chapstick smile. Your bite. I really enjoyed it. But anyway, so the dentist, he's an interesting guy. You'd go in there and the whole thing, of course, is like, how long do I have to wear these? Because it's a pain in the ass and you don't really enjoy it. And it was only, like, four months, as it all turned out. But he kept saying, four months. If you're a good girl. Okay. You know, I let it pass the first couple times, and then I go back in, like, now? How much longer? And he's like, only two more months. If you're a good girl. I said to Doug, I'm like, this guy's driving me crazy. Keeps saying I have to be a good girl. And then if I'm doing well, he'd be like, you've been a good girl. I can tell you're a good girl. I'm like, doug, what should I say the next time I'm in there? And Doug, you know, he's just very. He's like, Presbyterian. He's like, yeah, you should just say, you have to find a different way of talking to me. Wow, that's so frank. I love it. So I was all ready to drop it on him, and then he was like, oh, my God, you've been such a good girl. You can get him off right away. And I was like, oh, thank you. I did not challenge him.
Adam Carolla
By the way, Steve Martin was a less creepy dentist in Little Shop of Horse. Thank you.
Megyn Kelly
You should never. I mean, he's talking to me like I was a German shepherd.
Adam Carolla
You know, I. You know, guys, I don't know how.
Megyn Kelly
Old he was, you know, younger than I am.
Adam Carolla
Oh, really? All right, well, no. No excuse then. I'm not going to make excuses. I don't. Did any of your kids, speaking of quackery, get the helmet for their skull? They didn't describe. Oh, good. God bless you. They don't know about that. So in California, almost every celebrity's kid has the helmet on because their skull. And when I say kid, I mean infant, because their skull is supposed to be a little misshapen.
Megyn Kelly
What?
Adam Carolla
Oh, good. Oh, God bless. God bless. You don't know this. I swear to God, every third person I know in la, their kid had to wear this helmet. It sort of looks like a hockey helmet, and it's supposed to shape their skull.
Megyn Kelly
Isn't that just a birth canal thing that it's going to work itself out?
Adam Carolla
Well, now you sound like me, because that's what I was pitching, you know. Well, so the entire scheme, and this is sort of grander, which is like, they. First off, who's got money? They see you have money, number one. Number two, they then find the wife, and they told my wife that my son's glasses were not going to sit right on his head. So she immediately goes, oh, fine. And then there's this scam, which is. They go, I'm not an expert, I'm just a pediatrician, but I will put you with the cranial expert who. Who, by the way, gets paid telling you your son's skull is for shit because they don't get any money. If they go, that's a beautifully shaped skull. And then they mold your kid's head, and then they make a hockey helmet. Except for it's not a hockey helmet, because it's $5,000. Oh, I. I paid for that. And this kid had no interest in hockey. And I said, oh, no, I paid five grand for that. Now you're trying out. Hit that ice. Be a mighty Duck. So they put this helmet on, and they're supposed to keep it on literally 23 hours a day.
Megyn Kelly
What? This is like a newborn.
Adam Carolla
A newborn? Yes.
Show Announcer
Yes.
Adam Carolla
And we put the helmet on him, and he started crying immediately. And then it went one point. I saw one drop of sweat come down his forehead and get in his little eyeball. And I just said, we're getting rid of the helmet. I don't care if the kid's Quasimodo after this or mask or, you know, whatever. He. By the way, he's a Corolla. He's not getting. Let's get him a sense of humor, see what he can do here, you know? Yeah, he's fine. Is he? Completely.
Megyn Kelly
Of course. I mean, that's what been happening to every baby. I mean, I had C sections, but I will tell you, they. If you have a C section, they treat you like you didn't have a baby. Some of these crazy Upper west side moms. Oh, C section. Like, you're. Like, you're an abuser. Like, I have a kid, same as you do. What do you mean? Like, he's here. He's fine. Why. Why is he.
Adam Carolla
Did you take some leave? Like, Pete Buttigieg had the C section, I think, and he's. He took, like, three. Three months off. Or did he do it natural? I don't know. I'm not a dudicologist, but I didn't see it. But he took some months off for that.
Megyn Kelly
On the Upper west side of Manhattan, you would go. There was, like, a baby store where you could go for really cute baby clothes, and they sold, like, the sling. You could put the baby in the sling, and it was good. If you go to a restaurant, you can still have your baby with you when they're really little.
Adam Carolla
Oh, and if you saw a giant and you needed to take him down, sure. Goliath showed up, and you're like, all right, homes.com. some might say homes.com is the best home shopping site. It may be homes.com's super comprehensive and transparent agent directory. Or Maybe it's at. Homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you with the listing agent who knows the home the best. Perhaps it's because homes.com has the most in depth neighborhood content of any home shopping site that's extensively researched to highlight the personality of each neighborhood. Well, I think it's all the above. Homes.com goes above and beyond to bring home shoppers the in depth info they need to to find the right home. Right now. Homes.com that's homes.com. we've done your homework.
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Adam Carolla
We must make a massive demonstration.
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Megyn Kelly
So you, I mean, those of us who were normal would go in there as well because a sling gives you some modesty if you need to breastfeed your baby. Normal people are not taking the boob out and showing it off while people are trying to have their dinner, right? And they call them affectionately hooter hiders. And if you go into this store and you say, do you have a hooter hider or a sling? You know, like, which is obviously to hide the baby, they'd make you pay a dollar. They would punish you. Because the breast, you may not know this, Adam, is not a sexual organ. The breast is for feeding a child. And we have to let it out in order to be progressive, good Upper west side women.
Adam Carolla
I always looked at the breasts differently. But I was a big Adrian Barbeau fan growing up watching Maude. And I just, I didn't look at his nutrition as much as I look as an aesthetic. But okay, that's me. I have a theory. When I go to airports now, almost every airport has that breast feeding streamlined trailer thing that's in this. Have you seen this?
Megyn Kelly
Yes.
Adam Carolla
First off, they're built like bomb shelters. Like, if the terrorists ever start shooting, I'm gonna jump in there and be, hey, get out there and fight Al Qaeda. I'm locking the door. That thing is built like Hitler's bunker. Like, that thing is great.
Megyn Kelly
Let me tell you why you gotta have it. Do you know why you gotta have it? It's not just a breastfeeding.
Adam Carolla
I've never seen anyone use it.
Megyn Kelly
Well, why would you wouldn't be in there. What do you mean?
Adam Carolla
No, you don't. I have to know what's going on once in a while. Just say everything good, ladies? We good?
Megyn Kelly
Anyone need like a Diet Coke? What do you.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, And I'd be like. And they'd be like, excuse me. And I'm like, hey, I fly first class, use my toilet all the time, so don't think I not going to get a little access to your. To your booby room over here.
Megyn Kelly
Turnabout's fair play here is why it's necessary. Okay, Because. Because, yes, some people don't even like to feed their baby, even under the drape, but also because sometimes you have to pump your breasts when you're breastfeeding. And that is not a thing that can be done in polite company. I mean, you are completely bovine and there are machines involved. I will never forget, I was covering the Iowa caucuses with Bret Baer, and it was the year where Santorum and Romney were down to the last. And they lost like a truck had the last few ballots. Do you remember this? Must have been like 20. It was either 2008 or 2012. Must have been 2012. Anyway, we were on the air for nine hours straight. And I was a breastfeeding mother. And you ladies know when you're breastfeeding, let's just say you either have to have your baby or you gotta have that pump. And sooner than eight or nine hours.
Adam Carolla
Is it a sense of, like, urgency?
Megyn Kelly
You're going to leak all over your outfit on the air at Fox News? So it is urgent. Yeah, it's a problem.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. But listen, that's a ratings grabber. I mean, I'm not, I, I'm not. I don't program the station, but, you know, it's better. Like, Brett Bear crapped himself on camera. That's like, I don't know about Kelly.
Megyn Kelly
With a little.
Adam Carolla
Little lactose slip there. That would. That's a ratings grabber right there. I'm not saying you should have done it. I'm just saying, you know, it wouldn't hurt.
Megyn Kelly
Brett was always so sweet and he was very, like, straight laced. He did not like it when I made fun of him on the air at all.
Adam Carolla
He seems earnest.
Megyn Kelly
He's great. I love Brett, but he's not like, casual in that way. You know, he's a little bit more formal, and that was generally my experience of him, but always good. And one day I sat down on the set and I had very young ones and he had young ones just a little Bit older. And I was humming and I was like. And suddenly he starts singing to save the baby dolphin and save the day. And the two of us are singing Wonder Pets as we go to air. It was election night. That was 2012. Having young kids can really do something to you.
Adam Carolla
So let me. I don't really know a lot about pumping. For instance, I don't even know anything about humping, but less about pumping. Is this device. Is it battery operated?
Megyn Kelly
Yes. Yes.
Adam Carolla
And does it have a suction to it?
Megyn Kelly
Yes.
Adam Carolla
And. And suction cups? Two suction cups. Okay. And does there's. There need to be a strap on it? Like when a detective takes his blazer off and he's got the holster, you know, that goes around the side there.
Megyn Kelly
Goes around from behind you. It's got two holes right in the relevant part.
Adam Carolla
Right.
Megyn Kelly
You got to stick, like the suction cups in there. It's been a while, but I'm getting it right, aren't I? And then you. You connect the little wire and then you turn it on, and then it milks you like an Elsie. I mean, it's truly.
Adam Carolla
And then obviously it needs to be cleaned every once in a while.
Megyn Kelly
Is it dishwasher safe after every use. But that stuff is liquid gold. Not only because your baby loves it and it's good for your baby and all that stuff, but you lose weight like that when you are breastfeeding. They're selling breastfeeding to women all wrong. They're like, it's best for the baby. You should sell it with. By month six, you'll be losing 800 extra calories a day.
Adam Carolla
Oh. Because your body would absorb it otherwise.
Megyn Kelly
Great.
Adam Carolla
I never. I never thought about that. So you would have to clean it like you do a CPAP machine, I.
Megyn Kelly
Guess, on the cleaning of the breast pump.
Adam Carolla
You know what? When kids are involved, I'm mechanical. Like, at. At my heart, I'm sort of a builder mechanic, you know, so I see everything sort of through the lens of mechanical movement and how things work.
Megyn Kelly
Dishwasher. Is it completely beautiful? Lined up like an ocean?
Adam Carolla
I have never. I literally had this thought before I left for New York on Thursday, which is. I do not think I've ever used a dishwasher.
Megyn Kelly
What?
Adam Carolla
I do not have. Have a. I have a dishwasher. I. When I'm alone, when I'm not. When my woman is not in the house and I'm just on my own, I have one plate and one bowl and one mug and one fork and one knife and one glass. Guys know It. They don't advertise it because their wives are like, that's so gross. By the way, whose cooties are on this? You think somebody with syphilis list broke in and put their tongue on it? It's me. It's only me.
Megyn Kelly
But you have children. You were in a home with young children where you had to use a dishwasher.
Adam Carolla
I. I have never loaded a dishwasher or unloaded a dishwasher. I find it to be super redundant because you sit over the sink and you rinse all the dishes with hot water and a sponge. And the once they're essentially almost clean, then you put pile them into a device and three hours later you get an actually clean one. But if you'd stayed with it on the sink for another 11 seconds, you'd have a clean dish and you'd save the environment.
Megyn Kelly
No, you have to go the mka.
Adam Carolla
All women love dishwashers. I've never met a woman who wasn't in love. Oh, they wish they could marry a dishwasher.
Megyn Kelly
You are doing it all wrong. Okay, so first of all, I object to the pre wash. It barely gets rinsed by me before it goes. Okay, like, if it's really gnarly, I'll rinse it it, but otherwise I'm going in the dishwasher. That's what I hired it to do. That's its entire reason for being. But I throw it in there. I couldn't care less about how it looks, what the alignment is. My husband, who's much more organized than I am, it almost has a stroke when he sees what I've done with the dishwasher.
Adam Carolla
Really?
Megyn Kelly
It gets clean.
Adam Carolla
Doug likes the dishwasher.
Megyn Kelly
He likes it orderly.
Adam Carolla
Like, I don't trust this cat.
Megyn Kelly
He does not.
Adam Carolla
I don't like it.
Megyn Kelly
I don't know. You're either that way. He also goes to the airport three hours early.
Adam Carolla
Oh, we couldn't hang out.
Megyn Kelly
I thought it was a man thing.
Adam Carolla
No, no, no, no, no. It's a, it's a. It's a weird thing. And maybe it is more male than. Than female because females are late, I think, more than men. And can I just say this, ladies, because I've had a few of these in my life. When I've talked to women, I'm like, what time are you meeting your friend? And they're like, well, well, we're supposed to all meet for dinner at 7. She says 7, but she really means 7:30. But she tells me 7 because she knows I'm go take A look in the mirror, bitch. If your friends are lying to you about the time you need to show up, you have a problem that's on you. That's not their fault. They're lying because they picked your pattern out and they know where you're at.
Megyn Kelly
I'm not tardy. You're not tardy. I'm on time. But if I get on that plane and my lungs are. Are not burning from the run, I failed.
Adam Carolla
Right? No, I'm with you. And I sort of figured it out this way, which is weird. But you can tell me what you think of this. I did a syndicated radio show called Loveline for a decade. Yes. I'm not saying it for applause, but that was. And our show was two hours a night, five nights a week. Those Sunday through Thursday, weirdly. But it was a great schedule because I always had Friday night off. And it was. It was 10 to midnight every night. And Dr. Drew, who is very dutiful and is the kind of guy, like, I've traveled the country with Dr. Drew. And if I said, like, I'll meet you in the lobby, the hotel at 5:00am Literally at 5:01, he'd be. Be calling me, going, where are you? And I'd go, I'm in the elevator, coming down to the floor. You know, like, he was like that, right? And so he would get to Loveline a half hour, 45 minutes before the show started every time, there was no prep. And I would walk in when the music was playing to start the show. Now, the thing that's interesting about doing radio is, unlike podcasting or TV or whatever, they can kind of wait for you, but radio just starts. It just starts when it starts. Like, there were many times I was late or something happened. And it's surreal because you can tune into the station you're on and you can hear him going, we don't know where Adam is. And I'm like, I'm in my car. I'm in my car. Well, we hope he's coming to be here. You know, like, who was talking be Dr. Drew.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, okay.
Adam Carolla
Right. The person. And I always knew.
Megyn Kelly
Would you have ever done that as a solo host?
Adam Carolla
No, I don't think I. I needed Dr. Drew, but the times I knew I was really cutting it close is when I would walk into the studio and he was sitting in my seat, which meant he had control the phone lines. And they said, like, the Show's starting in 20 seconds. Sit. Sit there and do that. But the moral of the story is I would show up Minutes and moments and seconds before the show started every single night. And Drew would go like, I show up like a half hour early or whatever. And I'd say, you're a sucker. And he'd say, why? And I go, well, because the show's two hours and we do it five nights a week. But you show up a half hour early four days a week. You're already at two hours here, which is a whole show. So it's essentially like you're doing an extra show at the end of the week and I'm not. And I feel the same about the airport. Yes, you want to get to the airport an hour before you need to get there. Well, that just means your flight is an hour longer.
Megyn Kelly
So. But my husband says, no, I enjoy the airport. I read my book, I get there, I get settled. I'm like, no, every minute at the airport is a loss to minute.
Adam Carolla
I, I agree. And by the way, he enjoys the airport. Then go there during your off time when you're not traveling and enjoy a nice tome read, Old man in the Sea in the terminal next to the Chipotle.
Megyn Kelly
He would, he would, he enjoys the airport.
Adam Carolla
Believe it.
Megyn Kelly
I feel the opposite. But I, I agree with you on the show as well. Like sitting there. I mean, I would say I've always been very, very timely in showing up for any like, professional obligation I have. But I'm in general on the late side of things. Things. But I was thinking about mistakes like when you're first starting out. When I first started out in television, I had been a lawyer for 10 years, but I had never done any TV. And I got hired by Fox after just one year of part time work, very part time work at the ABC affiliate in Washington D.C. and then Brit Hume and Kim Hume hired me in D.C. at Fox. And one of the very first assignments they gave me was to go cover the George W. Bush inauguration parties. Like it was inauguration night. He had just won reelection, it was 2004. So I went and it was exciting. I was thrilled. And you had to, as the reporter, dress in black tie. You had to, you know, dress the part because you were going to the inaugural balls and I was stationed at the one ball and I was, you know, covering President Bush. And I got this really pretty dress and I loved it. And I had failed to account for the fact that it was very, very cold in the ballroom. And let's just say it became a topic of discussion on the Internet, which was very young at the time. And so was I.
Adam Carolla
Were you pumping?
Megyn Kelly
There was no pumping.
Adam Carolla
No pump.
Megyn Kelly
There were no babies.
Adam Carolla
No pump. Okay.
Megyn Kelly
But it was a situation, and it was, for 2004, a viral moment. And I remember going in and talking to Brit Hume about it. I'm like, oh, my God. All these people are writing about this particular thing, and I don't want to be known for this. And I'm so humiliated, and I didn't know, and blah, blah, blah. And Brit said, meghan, this is news, and everyone can see everything you do, and you're gonna have to get a thicker skin. And I said, or a thicker dress.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Megyn Kelly
That was one of my very first lessons I learned at Fox News.
Adam Carolla
Weren't. I think I was listening to your show a few days back, and you're saying that there was, like, a tabloid story about you and Brit Hume early on in your career that drove you. Not nuts, but then some said we were sleeping together. Yes.
Megyn Kelly
It hit the news saying that Brit Hume and I were having an affair.
Adam Carolla
When I said tabloid story, I. I meant not bowling together, like, because that would have been.
Megyn Kelly
No, it was insane. It was insane. He was my boss. He was married to my other boss, Kim Hume, who he was completely mad for, by the way. He. Brit. Like, that was second marriage for them. I'm. I'm in a second marriage, too. And they were completely hot for each other, and it was actually very. Brit did not in any way have anything close to a wandering eye. So it was just so absurd. And we later found out that it was someone who had worked in Fox News PR who planted it for some reason, like, I didn't even know this guy didn't like me, or I'm not sure what happened, but someone planted this article about us. And Brittany was so funny because he was, like, walking around the newsroom, like, proud as a peacock. I'm like, what are you. What are you doing? And he's. I'm like, over my computer terminal, like, oh, my God. You know, I'm new. People are going to think this is real. They're going to think I'm sleeping my way to the top here at Fox News. And he's like, what do you mean? He's like, it's fine. No one's ever going to think that, because there's never going to be any proof that anything happened, because nothing did happen. There'll be no pictures, there'll be no emails. There'll be no leaks. There'll be no eyewitnesses. And I'm like, I guess that's true. And he was like, come on. And I'M like, why do you look like that? And he goes, well, it's not true, but it's not impossible.
Adam Carolla
Then she heard the zipper drop. No, no, no.
Megyn Kelly
Perfect gentleman who adores his wife.
Adam Carolla
No, I like Brit Hume. There's something. He has a sort of way about him. And also, is Britt his full name or is his name like Britannia or something?
Megyn Kelly
No, I think that's his full name.
Adam Carolla
Who names your kid? Brit.
Megyn Kelly
Was a great boss. He was like merciless and in a great way. You know, he used to say, you know what I like about you? You're not a silly girl. There are a lot of silly girls running around Fox News. You're not one of them.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, you're a good girl. Like your dentist said, not silly. Good with that Invisalign. Oh, Riley Auto Parts. Well, they're in the business of keeping your car on the road. We know that they offer friendly, helpful service and all the knowledge you need. If I can't figure out what's wrong with my car, if it's having an issue, they always are the ones I call first. They have thousands of parts in stock and can test your battery for free, need wipers, brake light or any kind of quick fix. They will get you the right part. Everyone who works there is knowledgeable and friendly. I don't know, they held the door open for me when I was walking out last time with my hands full. The professional parts people at O'Reilly are your one stop shop for DIY auto stuff in store or online. It's O'Reilly Auto Parts, right? Dawson, stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today.
Show Announcer
Or visit us@o'reillyauto.com Adam that's o'reillyauto.com Adam.
Adam Carolla
Sisu well, if you're like me, you're a sucker for a good action film. And these days with Hollywood so bloated and lazy and self important, something actually works. It really stands out. And that's why I was excited to watch Sisu Road to Revenge. Screen Rant called it to finish John Wick and that is dead spot on. It's a high octane revenge story about a man who goes after the people responsible for killing his family. It's fun, brutal and doesn't waste your time with lectures you didn't ask for. If you're looking for a straight ahead action movie that actually delivers, this one's worth your time. Sisu Road to Revenge is available now on Prime Video, Apple TV and Fandango. Sisu Road to Revenge. Get it now on digital Rated R. Well, as we start to wind down here, I wrote down a bunch of stuff to ask about. I haven't asked about any of it, but I was curious about the whole Candace Owen, Erica Kirk kind of summit. Yes. And I really didn't. I. I am. I. I am blissfully ignorant of most things that are like these battles and these things of this, but I. They definitely exist. But did you broker a sort of peace accord or you team somebody?
Megyn Kelly
Well, not exactly. So they. Candace was very focused on Turning Point and what role, if any, they had in Charlie's death, which I don't believe they had any role in Charlie's death whatsoever. I love the Turning Point guys. They're absolutely dear to me. I adore them all. But look, you know, she's a podcaster, and she's entitled to ask whatever questions she wants. I'm not her word police. So I said on my show, I disagree with that. I don't believe they had any role. But, like, whatever. People do this. Like, they speculate about things, and it's really not my job to say, like, you may not ask that question. So she has her questions, and. Okay, she was doing her thing. It did cause significant problems for friends of mine like Andrew and. And Mikey, and I felt incredibly sad about it. And I dealt with those guys behind the scenes at length on how they should handle this, because in a way, all those guys are newly famous. You know, like Erica's newly famous. You know, you might have known her as Charlie's wife, but you didn't know Erica Kirk. Like, that name wasn't at the ready the way it is now. And so she and Andrew Colvett and some of the others have, like, overnight become big stars. And part of the problem with what's happening to them is when you're a superstar, which Erica now is, people are gonna say weird shit about you. They're gonna say mean shit about you. They're gonna speculate. I mean, honestly, like, I was laughing with my team, like, I've been called a racist, a bigot, a transphobe, a terf, and now most recently, an anti Semite, a neo Nazi, a pedophile lover, a slut, someone who slept her way to the top, a bitch, a C word, and All About Eve. I mean, we could be here, here all night.
Adam Carolla
I was just blowing off steam in my dressing room. I. I just. They screwed up the whole fruit platter, and I was just kind of. I. I was just venting. It really wasn't about you. It really. I was just blowing off Steam. I shut the door. I didn't think you could hear me.
Megyn Kelly
I. I didn't arrange the fruit the right way.
Adam Carolla
It wasn't right. The blueberries were all over the road. It was a disaster. But anyway, sorry, go ahead. But I just.
Megyn Kelly
So over time, you know, when you're in the public eye, you get used to, like, just to get it. You do get a thick skin, as Brett Hume told me, that I needed to get. And you kind of get like, there's another crazy thing that's being said about me. Whatever. It's a day ending and why. But my friends at Turning Point are not yet there. They're still very much like, oh my God. And the things that are being said are terrible. They are uniquely bad and offensive and upsetting. So I've kind of been trying to talk to them behind the scenes of like, I understand, but like, you can't control what people are gonna say about you. As ugly as it may be, you're not gonna be able to stop it. So the better course for you as these newly born superstars is to try to rise above and go on living your beautiful life. And then it turned to Erica specifically. And Erica then asked me if I would help her broker a sit down between Erica and Candace, which I said I'd be glad to do.
Adam Carolla
It's interesting and it's also, I try to think, and I'm very curious if you can tell me where you're at with this, which is people go, oh, Candace Owens, does she really believe what she's saying? Or sometimes they do that with Tucker Carlson or whatever. And I'm naive, I just go, I would assume they believe what they're saying. I would never. I say all sorts of provocative things, but I believe all the things I say. And I would say you say a lot of provocative things, but they're things you believe, right? Do you think she believes everything she says? Or she's just trying to be provocative and it's kind of a business at the end of the day, right?
Megyn Kelly
I don't know Candace that well, but I do believe she, she believes, believes what she says. I don't think she's a dishonest broker. I think she is saying what she really believes. I mean, I think Candace, like many people in the space, you know, is prone to, quote, conspiratorial thinking, but she hasn't been wrong about a lot of those so called conspiracies, you know, like she, she very much was against getting the vaccine. I wish I had listened to her.
Adam Carolla
Right, right.
Megyn Kelly
So there. You know, it's because you're prone to conspiratorial thinking, especially in today's day and age, doesn't mean like, you're some sort of a nut. I'm much more like, we landed on the moon, you know, Lee Harvey Oswald killed jfk. Like, I'm that person.
Adam Carolla
So I kills kids. I get it.
Megyn Kelly
That's real.
Adam Carolla
I know.
Megyn Kelly
But anyway, that's the problem. I would never doubt her sincerity. I think she definitely. I think Candace has been really going through it since Charlie died and she's really searching. I believe she really did care about him. He was a dear friend, and she's genuinely on a search to figure out what happened to him. I accept and believe that Tyler Robinson killed Charlie. And my only question is whether he had a connection to Transtifa or. But I'm fine with people asking questions beyond that. And I know it's upsetting to people and so on, but I just feel like this is America. Like that's what. In America, you're allowed to ask whatever questions you want. It's one of the beauties of the country, even if you don't like the specific questions. So anyway, that's where I am.
Adam Carolla
One thing I want to put your hands together. Yes, that's wonderful. There was a. So I'm very curious that I get to talk to you about this because James woods did your show several days back.
Megyn Kelly
Love him.
Adam Carolla
And I love James, although I wish he'd come on my fucking show. But okay, I'm a fan. I'm still a fan. And you and James were making fun of Don Lemon, which is great. And I think we land on the same thing, which he's kind of a 10 cent head and he's an egotist and he's a narcissist, but he's not that smart. So he says a bunch of stuff and pushes himself out there. And, you know, you can be dumb and quiet, or you can be dumb and a narcissist, in which case we're going to know all about how dumb you are because you talk into a microphone all the time and he's just a dumb dude. But there was a joke that James woods made about him in your show that I heard. And I was just driving in my car listening channel 111, by the way, SiriusXM. And I heard him make the joke and I was like, I don't know if. I don't know if Megan heard that.
Megyn Kelly
I know what a dingleberry is.
Adam Carolla
No, I know you knew what a Dingleberry was. No, you did. You did not know what the term pinch a loaf meant, by the way.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, that I did not know.
Adam Carolla
All right, so you're just.
Megyn Kelly
I figured it out.
Adam Carolla
But you know what? I don't want to live in a world where Megyn Kelly knows what pinch a loaf means. Do you? Thank you.
Megyn Kelly
Look at all the women. Look confused, too.
Adam Carolla
Good, good. You know what? Ignorance is bliss. You don't need to know what's in that hot dog. Just enjoy the ball game. It'll ruin the game.
Megyn Kelly
Got a little R rated. That's.
Adam Carolla
So he made a joke about Don Lemon. There was not a dingleberry joke. I heard the dingleberry joke, and I heard the pinch of loaf joke, but it was funny because you were like, james, what does pinching a loaf mean? And he was like, we're good. We're good. And she's like, no, seriously, I want to know. And he's like, I. We're fine.
Megyn Kelly
It took me a minute.
Adam Carolla
He's. He's too great. He's too big a gentleman to explain it. Not gentleman enough not to refer to pinching a loaf that. That he won't stop himself from, but he won't explain it because he's, you know, he's Sir Walter Raleigh, you know, but lady, she does pinch a loaf. All right, so there's this clip, and I think we have it. I think we can play it on the screen if that's. If that's possible. And I just want to know if you heard what he said when he said it. So I guess we can sort of. Don Lemon is a small man. He's a small man, period.
Megyn Kelly
That's it. Yeah. I mean, honestly, man is a stretch for Don Lemon. I don't know what he is.
Adam Carolla
He's definitely been. He's definitely been stretched.
Megyn Kelly
I mean, just. Man. It's the word man.
Adam Carolla
All right, now, as I'm listening in my car.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, my God.
Adam Carolla
I think.
Megyn Kelly
Did I get another one of these?
Adam Carolla
Let's get her another drink.
Megyn Kelly
Much longer.
Adam Carolla
As I'm listing my car. And also, I'm a comedian, and I've done my sheriff radio. I'm like, I think she missed that one. But I don't know for certain, because you made a face.
Megyn Kelly
I can't believe you teed that up and played it as the sole sound bite.
Adam Carolla
The one I said, we're not leaving Los Angeles without this sound. Sound bite.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, my God.
Adam Carolla
But I don't know.
Megyn Kelly
Completely missed. Completely.
Adam Carolla
Right over the top. Yeah. That was my. I Don't you know? Because it's. To be fair, you really want to.
Megyn Kelly
Get to the bottom of it.
Adam Carolla
We got to the bottom of it, sister. It's all stretched out.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, God.
Adam Carolla
No. You're trying to do an interview. You're sort of loading up your next thought and question. You're sort of off and running, and you do sometimes not hear things that happen in. In real time. Right. And it's not it. And by the way, lest you think listening is. Is easy, it's. It's not. It's a. It's a skill. Like, like, one of the more difficult things I had to learn was to listen, especially if you're a comedian, because you're trying to come up with your next quip or your next joke or next utterance. And I knew you didn't hear it. It was also a little. It was like there was a little back and forth and whatever, but I, I. I thought it was important that you relive it in front of an audience.
Megyn Kelly
I don't think I heard it. And even having heard it now, I don't totally get it.
Adam Carolla
Let's hear it one more time. Let's just. Let's. Let's just play it back one more time.
Megyn Kelly
Oh, God.
Adam Carolla
It's sort of in the neighborhood of pinching a loaf just because it's funny. Don Lemon is a small man. He's a small man, period.
Megyn Kelly
That's it. Yeah. I mean, honestly, man is a stretch for Don Lemon. I don't know what he is.
Adam Carolla
He's definitely been man. He's definitely been stretched.
Megyn Kelly
I mean, just man the workman.
Adam Carolla
All right, all right. Now you think he's talking about his Pilates instructor. What do you think he may be referring.
Megyn Kelly
You think he was talking about his one night in jail?
Adam Carolla
You know, this is a dream come true for me because I was literally driving down PCH listening to this a few weeks ago, and I was like, oh, man. And I'll never know the answer to this question.
Megyn Kelly
Of all things to focus on, you.
Adam Carolla
Know, the kids can wait. I've got to get to the bottom of the stretch joke.
Megyn Kelly
James woods is a national treasure.
Adam Carolla
I totally believe that. Guy's a national treasure.
Megyn Kelly
Isn't he so great? You would know if you interviewed him.
Adam Carolla
Oh, okay. I get it. We're gonna end this way, are we?
Megyn Kelly
No. No, we're not.
Adam Carolla
No. Because I have so much affection for Megan, and I feel very simpatico with you. Do you have that feeling?
Megyn Kelly
Yeah, no, I totally have the same feeling.
Adam Carolla
It's like when you're talking and I'm listening, and I'm listening to your show, I'm like, yes, yes. Like, I completely agree.
Megyn Kelly
Well, you've said before that you think I have masculine energy. You don't think, like, I'm your typical sort of quote chick. No, and I know what you mean. Like, I, I definitely was raised by a very sensible mom who sort of taught me that from day one. I was just telling my kids, I'm like, we, we have a new rule in the house that the car leaves at 7:15. Whoever is in it is in it. And everybody else gets left behind.
Adam Carolla
Yes.
Megyn Kelly
And my daughter's like, what? What do you mean? What's going to happen? How am I going to get to school? I'm like, you're going to walk. She's like, a walk. I'm not going to walk at 7 degrees. I'm like, well, then you're going to miss school and you're going to fall behind just the way I did in school. That's why I got a 1060 on the SAT.
Adam Carolla
At least you took them.
Megyn Kelly
Anyway, my point is, there was tough love in my house. And it was, it worked. You know, my, my parents were. They were completely loving, but they did not tolerate bullshit.
Adam Carolla
And by the way, those of you who are worried about dad or mom using discipline or being no nonsense or whatever, or even the dad that's away working a lot, when you talk to their kids, when they become adults, they'll go, yeah, my dad was tough on me, but I deserved it. And I learned a lot. Like, they, they don't regret it and they don't hold it against you. They kind of respect it, and that's fine. You don't have to be Mr. Popular around the house. You can teach some lessons.
Megyn Kelly
My parents were. And I don't mean this in the true word, in the true sense of the word, but in a great way. They were brutal. They were. But I completely adored them. And I knew they adored me, but they would look at me and say, she's going to be with us for a long time. And that was actually not bad because what they were saying was, she's not an attractive child, which I wasn't. And what does that do? Then you lean into the gifts you think you might have, which it might family was, can you carry on a snappy conversation? And you don't have to be funny, but you have to get funny. You have to, like, get when somebody else at the table is funny.
Adam Carolla
Right, right.
Megyn Kelly
And having a healthy sense of humor is such a gift to give to a child. So like I always grew up understanding humor was important. I wasn't. There was nothing special about me. If I tried really hard, maybe I could be special. But it wasn't naturally born and I was going to have to work hard to get get it and that all of that was fine. My parents totally loved me anyway and I was going to be cool. So like it was just such a relief. I never had to be extraordinary. I had total love. I did have to laugh a lot at myself and other people and my God, you really don't need much more than that to get through life.
Adam Carolla
Well, we can't go out on a more positive note than that. Megan Kelly, everybody loves you guys.
Megyn Kelly
Thank you so much for having me.
Adam Carolla
SiriusXM channel 111. I'm doing the mornings over there and I couldn't be happier.
Megyn Kelly
Lots of love.
Adam Carolla
And until next time, this Adam Crawford Megan Kelly saying mahalo.
Show Announcer
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At Pluto tv we're celebrating Black History Month with our free curated collection of black entertainment. No ifs, ands or buts about catch award winning films like Dreamgirls, Monster's Ball and Selma.
Adam Carolla
We must make a massive demonstration.
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Iconic hits like School Days and Set it off. Plus full seasons of shows like Tyler Perry's Sisters and Power a it star studded brilliant black entertainment. And it's all free. It's getting good this month and always on Pluto TV streamed now. Hey never at Pluto tv. We're celebrating Black History Month with our free curated collection of black entertainment. No ifs, ands or buts about catch award winning films like Dreamgirls, Monster's Ball and Selma.
Adam Carolla
We must make a massive demonstration.
Pluto TV Announcer
Iconic hits like School Days and Cells. Plus full seasons of shows like Tyler Perry's Sisters and Power. I got you it Star studded brilliant black entertainment and it's all free. It's getting good this month and always on Pluto tv Stream now pay never.
Adam Carolla Show (Live from Chester, NY) | February 5, 2026
Guest: Megyn Kelly
In this lively live episode, Adam Carolla welcomes broadcaster Megyn Kelly for a candid and comedic on-stage conversation before an energetic audience. The discussion is trademark Carolla—unfiltered, wide-ranging, irreverent, and insightful—as the pair delve into topics from personal health routines to media rumors, parenting, media culture, gender dynamics, and navigating public scrutiny. Humor blends with reflection as both recount professional anecdotes and riff on everything from parenting, body image, and conservative politics to tabloid drama, cancel culture, and broadcasting challenges.
If you want frank talk about modern life, the culture wars, and what happens when media insiders drop their filters, this episode delivers. Adam and Megyn bounce from hard truths to hilarious takes, inviting listeners into their worldview—warts, wisdom, and all.