Barry Rothbart on Growing Up With a Mob Dad & Bon Jovi Lies + MSNBC Roasted after Name Change

Summary

The Adam Carolla Show – Episode Summary Date: August 20, 2025
Guest: Barry Rothbart (Comedian, Actor, Podcaster)
Co-host: Jason “Mayhem” Miller
Main theme: Barry Rothbart’s wild childhood with a mob-connected, secretive father, the lies that shaped his upbringing, father-son dynamics, comedy industry truths, and pop culture topics including the MSNBC rebranding and generational trends.

---

Episode Overview

Adam Carolla welcomes comedian and podcaster Barry Rothbart, whose new investigative podcast explores the secrets and double life of his father—a complicated man who straddled the worlds of organized crime and unlikely family legends. The episode delves into the fallout of growing up with a father who lied extensively about his past, family revelations, the painful and comic turns of adolescence, and how these experiences inform Rothbart’s work as a storyteller. Along the way, the trio riffs on generational changes, sex and addiction, showbiz competition, comedy ethics, and the oddities of fame and advertising.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Barry Rothbart’s Mob Dad and Bon Jovi Myth (02:30–15:50)

• Barry grew up believing his father was Bon Jovi’s manager; it was just one of many fabrications, masking deeper criminal connections.
• Quote:
  Adam (03:38): “So I’d say in terms of the bio, there’s a difference between ‘managed Bon Jovi’ and ‘lied to his son about managing Bon Jovi.’”
• Barry’s father was a bookie for the Gambino crime family, ultimately arrested and revealed as a criminal rather than a music manager.
• Barry worked for his father as a bagman as a teen, not initially realizing the real consequences.
• Deathbed confessions revealed infidelity, possible other children, and direct mob connections.
• His podcast investigates the true extent of his dad’s activities and the emotional family fallout.

2. The Ethics of Family Secrets & Podcasting (06:11–07:33)

• Barry debated whether to reveal his father’s infidelity to his mother.
• Quote:
  Barry (06:25): “She’s going to hear the podcast. So I recorded our whole conversation. And she was like, ‘He should have fucking got killed years ago...’ She just really lost it.”
• Adam raises the question of obligation and honesty versus sparing loved ones pain, emphasizing podcasting’s “no secrets” aspect.

3. Dad’s Dual Lives: Crime, Gambling, and Sex Addiction (09:25–16:44)

• Barry’s dad wasn’t a killer, but a compulsive gambler and serial liar—embezzling funds as a Ricoh executive, blackmailing company leadership, and engaging in sexual misconduct.
• Quote:
  Barry (10:29): “I always thought he was an anti-hero... but he might not have actually been a good guy at all.”
• The family swung between poverty and occasional wealth; the instability shaped Barry’s perceptions.
• Openly discussed sex addiction, weird sexual behaviors, and his father’s complex legacy.
• Generational comparisons: Adam and Barry contrast their own fathers (restrained vs. chaotic).

4. First Sexual Experiences, Puberty, and Generation Z Contrast (21:57–29:47)

• Barry humorously recounts discovering masturbation, linking it to listening to Adam on “Loveline.”
• Quote:
  Barry (22:38): “The first time I ever came was when your voice was on... I was terrified.”
• The difficulty of accessing porn in their youth versus the instant, numbing availability for today’s teens.
• Adam bemoans “zero burger” culture—porn and fast food are both too easy and thus less valued now.

5. Testosterone, Modern Masculinity, and Social Trends (30:46–35:39)

• Discussion of studies claiming sharp declines in young men’s testosterone.
• Adam attributes this to microplastics, junk food, sedentarism, and a lack of environmental or social challenge.
• Debates on whether modern teens have the same sexual drive or intensity as past generations.
• Quote:
  Adam (33:41): “It’s an accumulation of things... No one’s barn raising or fucking and fighting anymore. Everyone’s just like sitting there producing estrogen...”

6. Comedy, Talent, Ego, and Showbiz Realities (52:11–62:19)

• Adam and Barry discuss the difference between being naturally funny and learned stagecraft.
• Adam shares his “wasted potential theorem” as personal motivation:
  Adam (54:06): “Stacking drywall on a construction site, thinking, 'I think I’m a comedic savant. I think I have a comedic savant...'"
• The politics of opener/feature acts in stand-up: Don’t outshine the headliner.
• The Letterman-Kilborn story: Letterman chose less-threatening Kilborn over Jon Stewart as his late night successor, prioritizing comfort and business over raw talent.
• Quote:
  Adam (56:33): “Do you want a guy who’s younger than you, better looking than you, and maybe funnier than you going after you? Is that what you want?”

7. The Standup Monoculture & Fame Economy (78:56–83:55)

• Standup has become the default “monetization of fame” for celebrities in the social era.
• Examples: Gronkowski, Blake Griffin headlining comedy events despite limited comic experience.
• Division between lifelong standups and those leveraging fame.
• Quote:
  Barry (81:37): “It’s a very quick way to monetize fame... Podcasts, stand up... If you’re famous, they’re right to the money.”
• Surprise: Adam reveals being prepped with “Blake Griffin sucks” roast jokes, then Griffin crushes it and his planned routine collapses—a lesson in authenticity and the pitfalls of pre-judgment.

8. Generational Competence, Impostor Syndrome & the “Gift” of Funny (72:49–78:45)

• Adam and Barry discuss whether true comedic talent is innate or can be achieved through effort; Adam likens comedic skill to music or impressions—a gift you know you have young.
• Adam attributes his confidence not to ego, but to certainty of specific ability.
• Quote:
  Adam (74:29): “You have a kind of base of security... I can build a house, and I can do things...”

9. The "Double-Hulled Pool" Metaphor: California Regulation Madness (110:13–117:40)

• Adam recounts a story from his friend Carson Daly: insane California codes required Daly to build a “double-hulled pool” (literally, two pools in one) to satisfy environmental regulations not found elsewhere.
• The anecdote becomes a metaphor for government overreach and misplaced priorities.
• Quote:
  Adam (115:07): “This is what they’re focused on right now... They want you to have a double-hulled pool, but their single-hulled reservoir doesn’t have any water in it.”
• Discussion on regulatory inefficiency and unintended consequences.

10. News Segment: MSNBC’s Name Change, Branding, and Media Critique (95:37–101:03)

• Jason Mayhem Miller covers MSNBC’s rebrand to “MS Now,” and the online roasting it received.
• Adam discusses why companies rebrand using initials in the 90s (see KFC) and how it doesn’t always solve deeper product issues.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “He lied to me for years saying he was Bon Jovi’s manager. That was his lie.” — Barry Rothbart (03:30)
• “You hear ‘manager,’ you don’t understand what a manager does. Yeah, I still don’t.” — Barry Rothbart (04:41)
• “He associated with people who killed people... There was a lot of weirder stuff. And there’s a big twist I can’t give away.” — Barry Rothbart (05:31)
• “300 grand in 86, $17 million now, is it?” — Adam Carolla (14:34)
• “‘The first time I ever came was when your voice was on...’” — Barry Rothbart to Adam (22:38)
• “I would say that anything you do...in the face of negative consequences... that’s a disease.” — Adam Carolla (20:20)
• “As a kid, I was like, ‘this is so cool.’ You know, and then you’re like, ‘oh, he was spiraling.’” — Barry Rothbart (16:16)
• “I was kind of accurate. I was like, look, I don’t want to be delusional...but I know I’m funnier than these guys.” — Adam Carolla (64:11)
• “Comedy’s the only gift people try to talk you out of.” — Adam Carolla (77:46)
• “She just really lost it.” — Barry Rothbart on telling his mom the truth about his dad (06:48)
• “You want anything? You want a beer or something? No, I’m alright. How about a glass of wine? Nah. Cocktail? No, I’m good. Sparkling water? Something? Just, just, just, you know, tap water.” — Adam Carolla on his dad (37:09)
• “If Obama wanted to do stand up and headline any weekend, he would be allowed to headline any weekend.” — Barry Rothbart (78:57)

---

Important Timestamps by Topic

• Barry’s dad/Bon Jovi Lie: 02:30–04:44
• Mob/Criminal History: 05:06–06:11
• Podcast Revelations: 05:31–07:33
• Sexual Deviance & Family Fallout: 09:25–15:50
• Gambling, Family Collapse: 14:09–16:39
• First Sexual Experiences & Nostalgia: 21:57–29:47
• Generation Z, Testosterone, Social Change: 30:46–35:39
• Comedy Motivation (“Wasted Potential” Theorem): 52:11–54:06
• Showbiz Competition/Letterman-Kilborn Story: 55:26–62:07
• Standup as Fame Monetization, Celebrity Comics: 78:56–83:55
• Comedy Talent: Born or Made?: 72:49–78:45
• California’s “Double Hull Pool” Story: 110:13–117:40
• MSNBC/MS Now News & Brand Discussion: 95:37–101:03

---

The Tone & Vibe

Typical of the Adam Carolla Show, this episode is a blend of candid, self-deprecating humor, nostalgic reflection, deep-dive personal storytelling (sometimes dark and outrageous), and a constant riffing on pop culture, generational divides, and the quirks of show business.

---

For Listeners

This episode is especially compelling for fans interested in true crime, showbiz backstories, the psychology of comedy, and the blurred lines between truth and performance. Barry Rothbart’s raw, sometimes darkly funny stories are both honest and outrageous, providing a lens on family, creativity, and the storytelling impulse.

---

Barry’s Podcast:
“Alan Rothbart” – Now available on Audible.

Adam Carolla Live:
Tour info and tickets at adamcarolla.com.

Co-host Jason ‘Mayhem’ Miller:
Check out “The Mayhem Show” on YouTube.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Well, in this episode, very funny. Comedian Barry Rothbart is going to tell us stories about his dad you won't believe. Also, we got Mayhem doing the news and we'll do all that right after this.

[Producer or Announcer]

The good times keep getting gooder because Adam Carolla is coming to your town. August 29th in Provo, Utah at Dry Bar, Torrance, California. Sunday, August 31st, two shows at Mom Said Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Producer or Announcer]

That's the name of the venue. Mom said yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Said yes.

[Producer or Announcer]

And September 6th in Charlotte, North Carolina. Two shows at the Comedy Zone coming up in September, El Paso, Albuquerque, Flagstaff, and more. Get your tickets for all these incredible [e-mail].

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, this is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. Bet Online continues to be your number one source for all your sports betting action. Baseball's in full swing. Football is right around the corner. And Betonline's got you covered with the latest odds, breaking news and live scores. Betonline even has live in game betting. While the games are being played real time. From MLB to UFC to tennis to NFL futures, bet online. That's the place to play. And between games, hit up the Betonline casino. Packed with top Vegas style games, poker and live casino. Betonline has it all. Sign up now and score big with VIP rewards, level up bonuses and weekly cash bonuses. Bet online. The game starts here.

[Barry Rothbart]

Foreign.

[Producer or Announcer]

Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California. This is the Adam Carolla Show. Adam's guest today, actor, comedian, podcaster, Barry Rothbard. Plus the news and trending topics with Jason Mayhem Miller. And now he constantly put boots on the ground when he was working construction. Adam Caroll.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get it on. Get to get on that treasure in a minute.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Get it on.

[Adam Carolla]

Barry Rothbard is here. Comedian, storyteller, podcaster. Raconteur. Mayhem's gonna be doing the news over there. Barry's story is interesting. His dad's story's interesting.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, to say the least.

[Adam Carolla]

So I was getting into this and it said your dad was Bon Jovi's manager.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's not true.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I. Yeah, that's.

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, it's a longer story than that.

[Adam Carolla]

I got it. Very top of my list. Says your dad was Bon Jovi's man.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's almost like someone now read this.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

No, no, but you had me at the. He trains raccoons. Is that what you do?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I train. I train raccoons.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Man, it's cool to be a raconteur.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, don't get out of the gate with cornball.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I don't Know what that means?

[Barry Rothbart]

I actually don't know either. Is it like rebel rap Storyteller. Storyteller. Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

A good story. It's a compliment. All right, so anyway, your dad did not manage Bon Jovi.

[Barry Rothbart]

My dad.

[Adam Carolla]

Your dad have anything to do with Bon Jovi?

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, he was in the mob and he lied to me for years saying he was Bon Jovi's manager. That was his lie.

[Adam Carolla]

So I'd say in terms of the bio, there's a difference between manage Bon Jovi and lied to his son about managing Bon Jovi. Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Up until I was 14, he told me he was Bon Jovi's manager and I started to believe it less and less. And then he got arrested and I found out he was a criminal.

[Adam Carolla]

Uh huh.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And he was what, for the mob then? By the way, information is so weird because I remember thinking Bon Jovi's manager and involved with the mob. That just seems like a weird combination of things to have. But all right. I mean, I didn't write. Yes, he said he was Bon Jovi's mancher.

[Barry Rothbart]

Okay, he said it. Yeah.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That lie is still working to this day.

[Barry Rothbart]

I mean, it's a terrible lie, but it's impressive.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, it's impressive until your son wants to see a Bon Jovi concert.

[Barry Rothbart]

Was it? That's the joke. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And then he's like, well, you know, the Giant Stadium is kind of an intimate.

[Barry Rothbart]

You know, he actually would go, yeah, I'll get you tickets. And then just hope I forgot.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Be like. You know, months would go by and I'd be like, did you get him? He's like, no, I didn't. I just, you know, you don't understand. You know, like, you hear manager, you don't understand what a man. Yeah, I still don't.

[Adam Carolla]

I had a manager. I didn't know what the fuck.

[Barry Rothbart]

I have one. I don't.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. Still don't know what they do.

[Barry Rothbart]

There's no.

[Adam Carolla]

They take money and they eat. That's what I know.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. And they email.

[Adam Carolla]

And they email sometimes. So he said that. And he was really working for the mob. But what was he doing for the mob?

[Barry Rothbart]

He was a bookie. Well, the story is he got arrested. He told me he was a bookie for the Gambino crime family. And he was kind of a higher up. And then I started working for him and his organization and I started, like, bringing bags from one place to another to dispose of and.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yo, man, why are you trying to bring a RICO case onto us? Over here, making me nervous.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. And it was. It was crazy. And then he dies of cancer and he left deathbed audio cassettes about his life. And apparently he had a lot of lies and he was doing a lot worse and weirder and darker shit than I had known. And that's where this story starts. It's an investigative podcast about what the hell is going on. I found out he might have had other kids. He was cheating on my mom the whole time. I had to tell her that he was. He associated with people who killed people. That was like. There was a lot of weirder stuff. And there's a big twist that I can't give away, but there was like a. It's. It was very weird. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

What is the obligation to share the cheating part with your mom?

[Barry Rothbart]

It's great podcasting.

[Adam Carolla]

It's good. It's good pod. Can I tell you the way I'm wired, It's like I find out something like that I don't share.

[Barry Rothbart]

The truth is, she asked. She found out I was doing this, and she was like, did you hear anything weird? And I was like, yeah. You know, it was like, yeah, he talked about a bunch. And she was like, what about our marriage? Was he seeing anyone else? And I was like, she's going to hear the podcast. So I recorded our whole conversation. And she was like, I'm going to fucking. He should have fucking get killed years ago. I was, fuck him. She just really lost it. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Barry Rothbart]

She lost her mind.

[Adam Carolla]

Good God, though, right?

[Barry Rothbart]

I mean, honestly, I was like, this is great.

[Adam Carolla]

So what was his ethnicity and what was your mom's. Jewish.

[Barry Rothbart]

Jewish, yeah, yeah, Jewish.

[Adam Carolla]

And not what we think of in terms of the mob.

[Barry Rothbart]

He looked like Italian. He was big and fat and he had like, you know, not that every Italian's fat, you know, but he had, like, slick back, but, you know what I'm saying?

[Adam Carolla]

You know, he looked like the guy.

[Barry Rothbart]

He looked like that guy. So not swarthy. The opposite. Whatever. The opposite of swarthy.

[Adam Carolla]

I think swarthy. Was he dark? I mean, I'm saying Jews and Italians can both look swarthy.

[Barry Rothbart]

Jews and Italians age similarly. Where your ears get big.

[Adam Carolla]

But let's look up swarthy.

[Barry Rothbart]

Swarthy to me means swarthy, I thought was, like, debonair.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, no. It's like raconteur.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's a storyteller.

[Adam Carolla]

No, it sounds like. It sounds different than what it is.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Swarthy guys definitely train raccoons.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, dark skinned. Oh, I'm way off.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Barry Rothbart]

I've been calling people swarthy for years.

[Adam Carolla]

Swarthy sounds debonair. Like, it is debonair, but it really just means dark features.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's insane.

[Adam Carolla]

Except for black people aren't swarthy.

[Barry Rothbart]

They're not swarthy.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know why you think they'd be the most swarthy, but they don't get. They're not covered under star.

[Barry Rothbart]

But by definition, they are. We just don't say it.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

They're swarthier than the average.

[Adam Carolla]

They're black. Oh, swarthy. I think you have these. A white guy who's dark with dark hair and dark eyes. I don't know if you're swarthy.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You're on the precipice of swarthy.

[Adam Carolla]

Your dad, I would say Jews and Italians both tend to be swarthy.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So. And raconteurs.

[Barry Rothbart]

I should have covered this in my podcast.

[Adam Carolla]

Your dad could be mistaken for Italian because he was a Jewish who was swarthy.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yes, exactly.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. So now.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. And hair. You know, the slicked back. You know that look.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

New York Italian. We grew up in Queens, so it was, like, very New York Italian.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. So he's in with the family, and he's up to no good. But what's the worst of it?

[Barry Rothbart]

Of what he did?

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, like, as a son, you know, you think, you know, there's a lot of sons who go, look, my dad may have done something wrong, but he's trying to protect us or he's looking out for us. And then there's cheated on mom, which is not great news as a son. But then there's kill the man to watch him die. And that's probably worse than cheated on Mom. You know what I mean? There's a hierarchy.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, he wasn't killing people. It actually is about how he was. He may have inflated a lot of the things he did. He claimed he was tougher than he was. He. And then I find out there's a big twist. Is that he. I'm not gonna say it here, but he actually lied about something huge in our life.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Barry Rothbart]

And I. It's about that. It's about me coming to terms with the fact that I may have done illegal stuff with him. Yeah. It's about our friendship. It's. You know, it's not about killing. I thought it would be. I thought I would go into it, but it's a lot weirder than that. He was doing weirder things. A lot of the. He was Doing a lot of sexual assault stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Like, yeah. And he was hated by almost everyone who I thought loved him. And he turned out to be a real darker, much darker. I always thought he was an anti hero, you know, he was like the guy that's like, ah, you know, I, I do bad things, but I'm a good guy. And it's about me feeling like he might not have actually been a good guy at all.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Why? Because like non consensual finger blasting of waitresses.

[Barry Rothbart]

Not waitresses, no. Like people on job interviews and stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah. And he like, he had a great job too and he, he was like the CFO of RICOH cameras. You remember Rico?

[Adam Carolla]

Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

He was, he had a huge job in the early 80s and he embezzled millions and millions of dollars from them. He sexually assaulted people there and he got caught and he ended up blackmailing the CEOs of the company to get out of it.

[Adam Carolla]

How'd he blackmail them?

[Barry Rothbart]

He had info on price fixing that they were doing. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, they were apparently price fixing a lot in the 80s. I've actually, what's funny is I'm not allowed to really say that it's confirmed, but he, everyone who I spoke to knew that he had this information because it never came out that they were doing this. Actually.

[Adam Carolla]

RICO was basically competitor to Canon and they made cameras back when cameras were a thing. And I don't know where RICO is now, although they may use the RICOH act to go after your. Yeah, yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Which is so funny. Yeah, no, they, they were huge in the 80s in copiers. That was their whole thing. They were like making copy machines. They were. Xerox and RICO were making copy machines.

[Adam Carolla]

They weren't making cameras.

[Barry Rothbart]

Then they started making cameras and he headed up that division for a while that started making cameras.

[Adam Carolla]

Where were they out of?

[Barry Rothbart]

They were out of Japan and he was living in New York and they had a headquarters in, in Manhattan that he was working out of.

[Adam Carolla]

And I could remember seeing like old commercials for. I don't know if it was tennis players or whatever, but it was like the RICO so and so used the rico.

[Barry Rothbart]

It was huge. Yeah, it was a huge company.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Now a camera to my family in the 70s would be, would have been considered like a big ticket, durable, good item. Like we wouldn't have bought a camera because it would have been expensive. And then also, what is a camera for? Capturing memories. Like we don't want to remember any of this shit, so we moved on.

[Barry Rothbart]

So you didn't have a camera?

[Adam Carolla]

No, we didn't have a camera. My mom didn't have a camera, My dad didn't have a camera. Nobody had a camera. It was considered, well, a. It was something. And we weren't. We did nothing. We did nothing. You know what I mean?

[Barry Rothbart]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

So we just didn't do anything? No, we didn't do anything. Like on the way in, my producer, after his long winded soliloquy about your dad touring with Bon Jovi for all those years, all the great years, and being a guitar tech for Jovi and sitting in on some of the Slippery When Wet sessions and all, after we covered all of that extensively, we carved out a little moment where he would explain that you're dad, you know, gambled away a million dollars and made the family go bankrupt. And then I said to him what I say to everybody when their dads do something like this. I go, is there a demonstrable difference between a dad who gambled away a million dollars and Jim Carolla who's never seen a million dollars and never had anything? We're both back at zero.

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, how did you feel about Jim Carolla? Were you, were you close?

[Adam Carolla]

We're like, not really, but like, I didn't. I would have been upset if he gambled away a million dollars. But the other version of gambling away a million dollars is just never having a million dollars or any money at all. And then your whole life is like, your dad gambled away a million dollars, except for you never had a million dollars. But everyone looks down on the dad who gambled away.

[Barry Rothbart]

In no way look down at those dads. I think those dads can be fine.

[Adam Carolla]

I think he gambled away a million dollars.

[Barry Rothbart]

You know, it's, it's addiction. It's like an alcoholic dad.

[Adam Carolla]

So your dad gambled away a million dollars?

[Barry Rothbart]

He was, he was a gambling addict. He was a big time gambler. He actually, the, the reason that I was told that my mom left him is he gambled 300 grand on the Red Sox to win the World Series in 1986 against his favorite team, the Mets.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, wow.

[Barry Rothbart]

And that was the Bill Buckner through the legs. And she, he lost 300 grand and she, she divorced him the next day.

[Adam Carolla]

300 grand in 86, $17 million. Now, is it?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. Well, look, I can tell you this. I mean, I can tell you in 1986, if you bought a home around LA for 300 grand, you'd get a big home in Encino for 300 grand in 86. And that was pricey. And that same home is 6.2 now. You know what I mean? So whatever that was, it wasn't worth, you know, it wasn't twice as much. It was seven times.

[Barry Rothbart]

I have no idea. Yeah. And now with inflation, who knows, you know, it could be worth.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. I mean, it's. It's. It's worth. It's worth a lot.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. There's no way to know, but at.

[Adam Carolla]

Least a million bucks. But either way, your dad.

[Barry Rothbart]

It was a lot of money.

[Adam Carolla]

Dad gamble away.

[Barry Rothbart]

Gambled. He was an addict and he kind of. He.

[Adam Carolla]

Gambling addiction.

[Barry Rothbart]

He was a gambling addict. He never took a drink, never did drugs. Just was a sicko, degenerate gambler. And I didn't know it. I thought it was just fun. Like, we would go to OTB together, and I was like, this is great. Like, we get to bet on horses. And like, he would throw me, like, 50 bucks when he won. It was like. It was cool. I was. I was loving it.

[Adam Carolla]

Your dad was into OTB and opp. Yeah. If you really want to break down who that guy was and essay. Yeah, he's down with OTB and opp. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I don't know. At least there was some color in your childhood. A lot of color with that.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, that's. That's the. That's a big part of it. We were dirt poor, and then we had a lot of money, and then we're dirt poor again. And at some point my dad was homeless, and I didn't realize that we were just at hotels. It's like, you know, when you re. When you re. Piece together some of this shit in your life, you're just like. As a kid, I was like, this is so cool, you know? And then you're like, oh, he was spiraling, you know, like he was in a.

[Adam Carolla]

Was he ever violent with your mom or was there any. That sort of domestic stuff?

[Barry Rothbart]

Not that I know of, but she claims, you know, there's a lot of sexual weird stuff that comes up here. And he had this strange thing. I spoke to a lot of his ex girlfriends where he would jump.

[Adam Carolla]

He.

[Barry Rothbart]

When he was having sex with people, he would jump into the closet and jerk off alone because he wanted to be private. And he had this strange affliction.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Strange finishing move.

[Adam Carolla]

He didn't bring this up at the eulogy, did you?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Dearly beloved, we are gathering.

[Adam Carolla]

I didn't know it was closet.

[Barry Rothbart]

So he loved jerking off in closets. It's a strange fucking.

[Producer or Announcer]

Like.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah. And a few people said it. It was like a strange thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Can we agree.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, I'm agreeing with whatever you're gonna say, Nick.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's turning into love lines.

[Adam Carolla]

Can we agree that it's like, while we make fun of these people and we don't, as a society, we don't have a lot of sympathy. Like, we don't have sympathy for pedophiles, but it is a disease to be attracted to a nine year old boy. Like, that's like a disease. You know what I mean? I couldn't. If you said to me, you know, what would you wish for for your son? Would you like him to smoke or drink or if he had addiction or something, attracted to nine year old boys, I would go, well, that's the one I don't, I don't want. Yeah. And, and it's, it's just, it's. I would argue it's more powerful than drinking, smoking, gambling, because it's in you. Like, you know, this will ruin your life. You will go to jail for the rest of your life. You'll have to be kept in confined, solitary confinement in jail. And I'm doing it anyway, you know what I mean? Like that it's a shoot.

[Barry Rothbart]

Your shot. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And so like in the closet.

[Barry Rothbart]

Now, just to be clear, I'm total agreement that when it comes to pedophiles are terrible.

[Adam Carolla]

And I was talking to Jay Moore the other day on our podcast.

[Barry Rothbart]

It was great.

[Adam Carolla]

He was. Oh, thank you. And he was explaining to me that there's such a thing as a porn where women, Women make anime faces when they're getting pegged from behind, you know?

[Barry Rothbart]

What does that mean?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, again, the uwu. Yeah, they make, I don't know, the.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Young girls are all into it.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, like some people can do a face that kind of looks like a horse or a duck or something when you see it. Or Jim Carrey or something. Yeah, it's called.

[Barry Rothbart]

So they mug.

[Adam Carolla]

It's called a hego porn face. Yeah. And they mug, they mug the camera. Like Jim Carrey, right? They mug the camera.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Like you're pegging Jim from behind. Okay. Cross eyes. Now here's what I'm saying. I gotta look that up. And what I'm saying is, is I don't, I'm not, I'm not really into that, you know, but then I realize people are. And then I, and I. My first impulse is to make fun of those people. But really, you should sort of feel sorry for them a little bit.

[Barry Rothbart]

I don't know why that has to be mutually exclusive.

[Adam Carolla]

I've been Dubai for people who do.

[Barry Rothbart]

Laugh at them all the time.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? I do that with disabled and blacks. I do it all the time. You're right. You're right. No, you're right now. So your dad, who. It's insane that this is one of.

[Barry Rothbart]

The elections that he had where he. I think so too.

[Adam Carolla]

I just mean now let's just define it as something that cannot be controlled and something where you go, I wish I didn't drink as much as I do.

[Barry Rothbart]

You think sex addiction is a disease?

[Adam Carolla]

I would say that anything.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You do.

[Adam Carolla]

And Dr. Drew used to say this all the time. I'd go, well, what is the difference between an alcoholic and then me who likes to drink and drinks all the time, but nothing happens? And he goes, well, in the face of adverse consequences. Are you getting DUIs? Did you get fired from work? Did you miss your flight? Are you getting arrested on an airplane? Are you doing this in the face of these negative consequences? And the answer is no. Just getting drunk, you know what I mean? On the weekend or whatever. I'm staying at home or whatever. I'm at a concert.

[Barry Rothbart]

Not the same with pedophilia though, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Not the same with your dad or anything. If you're just a guy who just is a serial philanderer and then you get caught and then you fucking get divorced and then you get fired, I would kind of argue that's a disease.

[Barry Rothbart]

I think he absolutely had sex addiction, whether it's a disease or not. There was a story he had where my mom and him took a cruise right after they got married and he had sex with multiple women on the cruise while they were on vacation there. Just would sneak away in the middle of the night and I'm like, you know, that's kind of like amazing.

[Adam Carolla]

It is.

[Barry Rothbart]

Like, if you get away with that, that's kind of like, you've earned it. I agree.

[Adam Carolla]

Especially being swarthy and all dong like.

[Barry Rothbart]

James, I don't understand. You know, I have a. I have a five year old and I'm married. And I'm just like, how do people cheat? Like, I don't have time. I mean, I tour. I was touring for a while and I guess touring makes it easier. But like, I'm like, if my wife cheated on me, I'm like, good for you. Like, how did you find an hour to get away?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, Barry, there's a real reason we asked you to Come on. This podcast.

[Barry Rothbart]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

These mics, they're not even plugged in. Okay, okay. I know your wife. Great. Good for her. She's a good woman. She's a good woman. Okay. And she doesn't mean harm. She does not mean harm, but she has a stressful life and, you know, a woman has needs and, you know, your way. Been away for quite some time on these tours. How are you dealing with her not showering, her beautiful closet? Your closet is impeccable. Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Can I tell a weird story that has to do with Dr. Drew and you?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Because this is something I was thinking about for a while, that the first time I ever jerked off was to your voice. And I've been talking about this forever, and I've never had the chance to meet you. We've been in Santa, and I've just been. Not the first time I jerked off. The first time I ever came was when your voice was on. I was listening to Lovelace.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay. So I'm gonna go with some sort of quasi nocturnal emission. No, you were with a woman the first time you came. No, no, no.

[Barry Rothbart]

I was listening to Lovelines.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

In my room. With.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. But you said not jerked off.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's not the first time I jerked off. It's the first time I. And it was.

[Adam Carolla]

Something came out.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah, it was. You know, you were probably talking to some call her about her period or whatever, and.

[Adam Carolla]

I just got hard and.

[Barry Rothbart]

I was just like, oh. And it was. You know, I didn't even have to do much. It just was. I was terrified.

[Adam Carolla]

Were you out here? What? Were you in Los Angeles or. Where were you?

[Barry Rothbart]

New York.

[Adam Carolla]

New York. I didn't know we were on it.

[Barry Rothbart]

I was in the studio.

[Adam Carolla]

You're on console?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

You're in New York at the time?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Queensland. I'm trying to think because I never thought we were syndicated to New York.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Buddy, you were north.

[Barry Rothbart]

You were everywhere, man.

[Adam Carolla]

Now maybe we were.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Everywhere. Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Religiously. And I had to hide that I was listening to it because it was kind of like porn a little bit.

[Adam Carolla]

It felt like it. Well, you're welcome. Number one, I guess. But it was terrifying. How old were you?

[Barry Rothbart]

I Must have been eight or nine.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no.

[Barry Rothbart]

What am I saying? 11.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Probably like 11 even.

[Adam Carolla]

11 is a little bit early.

[Barry Rothbart]

Is that early?

[Adam Carolla]

No, I would say. Well, think about his family history.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Okay? You know what I'm saying? His dad was fucking everything. A rattlesnacking snake in the mouth. You know what I'm saying?

[Adam Carolla]

He's a chip off the old cock, this one.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So hold on a second. What is the average? Okay, so what I think is the average age, I think of puberty.

[Barry Rothbart]

Who knew this would be so much? About nine and ten year old boys.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh yeah, we're good, we're good.

[Adam Carolla]

Most of the time we only spend 15 to 20 minutes on it, but we're dedic a whole hour. Puberty to me strikes me as the beginning of the jerk off period.

[Barry Rothbart]

No, I was doing it way earlier.

[Adam Carolla]

But you were way earlier. And there are a lot of guys. I would say, here's what I would say. I would say the lion's share are between 13 and 14 somewhere in there for jerking off, for puberty.

[Barry Rothbart]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

That's a lion's share. And then there's a percentage that's before that, like 11 and 12.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And then there's a percentage that's after that. 16, 15, you know what I mean? And that percentage is probably about the same. Probably about 20% before and about 20% after. But the lion's share of the 60%.

[Barry Rothbart]

And the early ones have all gone on to be like presidents and state and.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, oh yeah, they knew what they were. No, it's like when you talk to Chris Rock. So my mom used to drop me off at the club when I was 13. I do a standup set, you know what I mean? You knew what you want.

[Barry Rothbart]

I can remember literally eight or nine in the shower, sticking my dick in a shampoo bottle. And like, this is amazing. And being. I thought I invented jerking off. I thought I was like. I was like, I can't believe I figured this out. I was like, I had to tell friends.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I know, you do seem a bit suave.

[Adam Carolla]

Can we remember?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I mean, look at his head and shoulders.

[Adam Carolla]

Can we agree? And how long was now I was a late bloomer in the beat off department. But I remember like being 13 and babysitting and going right for the Playboys. Cause as previously discussed, my dad owned no Playboys or no anything. He didn't have a gun or Playboys or booze or you didn't have any of the good stuff around the house.

[Barry Rothbart]

What was your dad doing? He must have had some crazy crumbs.

[Adam Carolla]

Sat on the sofa, Red Books. He just sat there.

[Barry Rothbart]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So I would get the Playboys and I would get them out. I remember being 13, man, I could have been 14. And I would just stare at them. Just like stare at them, you know, and then like touch them and just stare and touch and stare and Touch. I didn't know what to do beyond. I didn't know what to do beyond that. I was just like staring at them. But no, you fuck the shit up.

[Barry Rothbart]

I organically figured out masturbating just like without anyone telling me, without ever seeing it. I had. Well, first of all, we would do. My friends and I, we would just do the like Playboy channel because it was blocked on cable. So we would do the up down on the channels. Do you remember this?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

And you'd get a fuzzy boob cut, like pop in. And we were just like watching. We'd be like, I don't know, what do we do now? Like, we would just watch this stuff and I. What do we do? And I, I think I started at some point just like hitting my dick, just like slapping it and was like, that's closer. It was like a monkey figuring out.

[Adam Carolla]

How to write, you know.

[Barry Rothbart]

Eventually you hit a pen, you know, and, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

So your dad had a very prodigious appetite sexually and beyond.

[Barry Rothbart]

He gave me my first nude magazine too. It was called Slick Magazine. And it was like women in their 40s shaving their legs.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really Naked?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, very specific.

[Barry Rothbart]

It was really strange.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I remember. Well, I didn't have. I had friends who had nudie magazines.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I was that friend.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, we would have been fast friends.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I'd sit there, whisper sweet nothings in your ear while you're beating off into a shampoo bottle.

[Barry Rothbart]

I mean, it is weird that kids now can just get it, you know? Just how hard it was to access porn when we were kids was unbelievable.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I would say that porn is basically the same in terms of availability, is eating fast food, which is pretty much, pardon the pun, a zero burger in my teenage kid's world of just, you know, so who cares? So for us, they don't even care. First off, it's too easy.

[Barry Rothbart]

How old is your kid?

[Adam Carolla]

Money's free. 19. I have 19 year old twins. I mean, they have fast food brought to the house and they just pull their phone out. Zip, zap, zoop. Bring the fucking fast food over, bitch. I'll just eat it here or I won't. It'll just get dropped off on the porch and I'll forget about it. You would ever fucking Forget about a McDonald's burger when you were a kid? Look, this stuff was such a big deal, huge. That once in a while, and I'm talking about once a year, possibly twice a year after maybe a playoff win or something. Duke Gallagher, our coach from the East Valley Trojans would announce that he's taking the team to McDonald's and pay for everyone to go to McDonald's on a Saturday after the game. And that was a huge fucking deal.

[Barry Rothbart]

Huge.

[Adam Carolla]

That was huge. First off, what about the largesse, like Duke Gallagher, what's your $21 bill for 17 kids? First off, like, who has got this kind of fucking cash on hand? No way. Jim Caroller, Kurtis girls are buying. They wouldn't buy for their own kids. There was 17 other kids, you know, but the idea that we would go there or that, you know, after the game you'd get an orange flavored Shasta Cola, you know, from the cooler or something after the game's like, oh, my God.

[Barry Rothbart]

I couldn't imagine drinking water at some point. I was like, you drink soda when you're thirsty.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. I was like, I can't. I could not imagine just picking up a glass of water. Affluent also, my mom called McDonald's a restaurant growing up.

[Adam Carolla]

She was like, kids and I have the same relationship with porn. It's just on their phone, like, who cares? I don't even bother.

[Barry Rothbart]

Is it true a lot of kids now, they just don't think about sex? I've heard that, that there's just no sex. And I'm like, I can't buy that.

[Adam Carolla]

I thought I saw, and I do believe this, and it was a tweet. I don't think I liked it, but I think it was Kennedy said something to the extent of. Yeah. Robert Said Jr. Said that the average American male at 18 or 19 or something now has the testosterone levels of a 68 year old. Mail from back in the day from like the 50s or something, and I totally believe it. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Yeah, O'Reilly Auto Parts. They're in the business of keeping your car on the road, y'.

[Barry Rothbart]

All.

[Adam Carolla]

O'Reilly Auto Parts offers friendly, helpful service and the parts knowledge you need for all your maintenance and all your repairs. I always go to O'Reilly. I just got back from the track, so I had to do a lot of prep for those cars. And O'Reilly, that's where I go to get my parts. Always have. So whether you're a car aficionado or an auto novice, you'll find the employees at O'Reilly Auto Parts are knowledgeable, helpful, and best of all, friendly. Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or you can visit us online at o'reillyauto. That's o'reillyauto.com Adam this summer, Pluto TV.

[Commercial Announcer]

Is exploding with thousands of free movies, Summer of cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cop, Good Burger and Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto tv. Stream now. Pay never.

[Caller or Guest]

Oh, what you eating?

[Adam Carolla]

The new banana split cookie from AM pm.

[Commercial Announcer]

All freshly baked with real butter with.

[Adam Carolla]

Banana, chocolate and strawberry flavors. Wow, that sounds amazing.

[Caller or Guest]

Can I have a bite?

[Adam Carolla]

I'm sorry, but no. But you can't split the banana split.

[Caller or Guest]

Not even a little.

[Adam Carolla]

Not even a crumb. What if.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

No, please.

[Commercial Announcer]

Mine when it's too legit to split. That's cravinience.

[Producer or Announcer]

Get a 3 pack for 99 cents.

[Adam Carolla]

With our app ampm.

[Commercial Announcer]

Too much good stuff. Plus tax where applicable.

[Producer or Announcer]

Prices and participation may vary.

[Adam Carolla]

Terms of conditions apply. Now look, nothing is just one thing. It's. It's an accumulation of things. It's all the microplastics, it's all the junk food. It's all that, you know, all the genetically modified fucking food. It's all the bullshit. It's all weight, you know, not. Not enough good beef and way too much fucking grains.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

And don't forget, your phone's radiating your balls.

[Adam Carolla]

Your phone's radiating your ball sack. Like it's a whole mixed with some sort of weird soft sedentary lifestyle, you know, mixed with no one's barn raising or oh, couch potato, no one's fucking and fighting anymore. Everyone's just like sitting there producing estrogen, you know? Watch.

[Barry Rothbart]

I mean, I'm barely. I'm full of microplastics. And I'm like, I still might just. My. My drive is great. I'm like, well, I wish it was less, you know, you're. And I'm on SSRIs.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, as I said, I was the same about Dr. Drew. You're a man of passion. I mean, you're an extraordinary man of passion.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I could only jerk off to your voice now too. It's the strangest thing.

[Adam Carolla]

I'd say teenage boy today in America has less Testosterone than a 68 year old man. Yeah, that was the RFK tweet. Historically or something.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Check the numbers on that. I got some fighters in the gym.

[Adam Carolla]

That are beast fighters. Produce testosterone because they fight. You will produce more testosterone if they make you the head, if they make you a captain of industry, if they go, you're now running this factory. You'll produce more testosterone running the factory. I don't know if it has to do with adrenaline. But your position. Yeah, yeah, your position affects it. You know, exercise, you know, combat, you know, stuff.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

As well as like how much red meat you eat or how much plastic you into or whatever that is. But by the way, playing video games and being p whipped and vaping all day is going to decrease it. Right. So like when you fucking eat too much grubhub and you got man tits, that'll. That'll do the same the other direction.

[Barry Rothbart]

Sure.

[Adam Carolla]

With the testosterone.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I'm sure it's a combination of things. I'm just blown away because it was just such a singular drive as a kid, you know, to find porn, to find this stuff. And I'm just like, it's crazy.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

I mean, I look at it.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That was close to my dick in a book.

[Adam Carolla]

Kindergarten. Yeah. Really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. What book?

[Adam Carolla]

The Bible. He's so bad.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The yellow pages, Leviticus.

[Adam Carolla]

Every book was a pop up book over Mayhem's house.

[Barry Rothbart]

I do, I remember. I don't know if you said your dad didn't keep any porn in the house, but one. I just remembered this one video.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, if he kept it in the car, I would have went and got it. But he didn't have. My dad didn't have vices or things or pulse.

[Barry Rothbart]

That means he probably had a huge one that he didn't tell you about.

[Adam Carolla]

Huge hog or huge vice. Yes. I don't know. No, he didn't have. He didn't have anything. Which is such a way.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Well, you did the investigative journalism. Like you went full deep dive. You ever done that?

[Barry Rothbart]

Your dad's the next.

[Adam Carolla]

I lived it. I lived it. My dad was the kind of guy, my dad. Here's the kind of guy my dad was. He would show up for Thanksgiving, you know, he'd show up for Thanksgiving and he'd come walking in and you'd go, hey, dad, you want anything? And people are eating and drinking, you know, and I, you know, you want to. You want to beer or something? No, no, I'm all right. He wasn't sober. He just like, nah. I'm like, how about a glass of wine? Nah. A cocktail? No, I'm good. Sparkling water? Something, something, Something like that. Just, just, you know, tap water, you know, literally on Thanksgiving, just walk around drinking tap water.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's like my stepdad, that's who he was.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean? And then, you know, you know, be like 8 o' clock and he'd go, yeah. I would say, well, maybe a little more tap water. Oh, you know what I'm Driving. Probably. Probably should cut myself off that tap water. Let's just go home and go to bed at 8:30.

[Barry Rothbart]

I mean, he was murdering people.

[Adam Carolla]

He was. Their bodies under the house. Yeah, there's runaways in the house. I should talk to my stepmom.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, my stepdad was like that. He was always just like, you know, he's still alive. I don't know to say was, but he was just. Simple guy. I remember he would sit down like you said. He would yell and go, another day.

[Adam Carolla]

And that's it.

[Barry Rothbart]

His day would be over.

[Adam Carolla]

That's. He would just say, another day. My dad did that. But with a life, he just sit down and go. And then his life was over.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's it.

[Adam Carolla]

And here we are.

[Barry Rothbart]

If you gave him a chair and the Yankee game anywhere on earth, he would just stay there until you picked him up.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. I had to give my dad a chair and a Leo Buscaglia book. Was it Buscalia look up Leo Buscaglia. That's all. It's just. You consume a book and a chair and he just sit there and maybe some tap water.

[Barry Rothbart]

Is that a better existence? That's got to be a better existence, right, Than, like just having running numbers for the mob?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's a weird. You know, it's.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. What was Leo Buscalia?

[Barry Rothbart]

Looks like Saddam Hussein.

[Adam Carolla]

What was his. What would we call him? Like, what would his claim to fame be? Look like a tattoo. You can look. He can. Dawson can look up Leo Buscaglia. But that's all my dad wanted. A little hose water, folding chair in a Leo Buscalia book.

[Barry Rothbart]

I heard a theory that some people.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on.

[Producer or Announcer]

Motivational speaker.

[Barry Rothbart]

No, he was a motivational speaker.

[Adam Carolla]

He wasn't a motivational speaker. But, I mean, he did motivational speaking, but motivation. Rocky Blier is a motivational speaker. But if you say, who's Rocky Blier? You have to say, he won four Super Bowls with the Pittsburgh Steelers of. Vietnam vet who starred in the backfield of Franco Harris. You wouldn't say motivational speaker. Everyone has.

[Producer or Announcer]

He's known as Dr. Love.

[Adam Carolla]

Dr. Love, that's right. And he wrote books. He was an author. Right.

[Producer or Announcer]

He was an author, a motivational speaker and a professor.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I'm only being a douche because I said, you give my dad a book and he sat down and read it from a motivational speaker, then that doesn't make sense. He was an author and whatever. But that's all. I don't see. I don't know. I don't know what to make of. I don't know what to make of things like life and what's better. Okay, what's better? So I just got back from the track, which is not the kind of track your dad's used to, but it's a race car track. And then I was hanging around on Rick Caruso's yacht, and then I was on the lawn at pebble with $10 billion worth of cars.

[Barry Rothbart]

Today?

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, today would be tough. It'd be tough for today because it's at least. It's like 500 miles away. But I just got back. I'm sorry, I mean, I got back two days. Yeah, a day ago when I said just got back, like my son, I just got back. This guy is busy, he's living his life.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Quite the rock on tour.

[Adam Carolla]

1:30, we're out on the lawn at 4:00am looking at cars. And then I jumped in my car and got back there by noon. No, these things take place over the weekend. Traditionally, I am with you, the bunch of guys with super expensive cars. And I mean, I don't mean $500,000 cars, I mean $50 million cars and lots of that and lots of real big collections and went to guys houses that had real significant collections. And literally where you pull in and the garage is two stories and has, you know, 40 cars in it. And it's a. It's a kind of a wealth that goes beyond what you, what you think of when you think rich guy. You know, you're going, and you walk in and there's a person serving wine, you know? You know what I mean? Because this guy, if he invited a couple people over to look at his cars and didn't have a butler serving wine, then that would be gauche. That would be considered. He wouldn't do it, even though he just come by and look at the cars. But he has to have a staff of people that are there to guide you, to serve you, to show you, to greet you, this kind of stuff. And then you start kind of thinking about it and you go, well, Jesus, man. I mean, you gotta go down there, you do a race. It costs a lot of money to enter the race. The car, it costs a lot of money to get the car out there. You got it, the car breaks, you gotta fix the car like shit happens. Then you gotta pack the car up and take the car back here. And now there's a trailer and a dually truck sitting in my driveway and I gotta figure out what to do with it. And the car's in it and stuff like that. And there's a part of it where it's like, man, this is a big ass hassle. And then it's also. It's expensive and it's a hassle. So then you go, I don't know, maybe old Jim Carolla had it right. Cause Rick Caruso has to deal with a yacht and 35 people working on his yacht, he's got to deal with, you know, he's got to make sure there's enough. Whatever. I mean, he's got people. Don't get me wrong.

[Barry Rothbart]

I think super wealthy people, they don't want comfort. They're not seeking an easier life. They're seeking power. They're seeking things that maybe I don't even understand, but they're definitely. I don't think they're seeking an easier life. Do you think so?

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, no, no, no. Not easier. No. I believe. And I don't think it's power, per se. It's like winning. You go to the yacht. Everyone knows whose yacht it is. And he, by the way, Caruso, ferries us back in the boat to take us from the yacht to the dock. He tells the skipper of that boat, slide over. He grabs the wheel. Cool. And he's talking. And by the way, drops in at the dock, pulls a Brody, comes around, throws it in reverse, and just stops it perfectly in front. And there's like a smattering of applause of the people on this thing. And you're like that dude. Everyone knows, you know, my son's wearing a hat to the track the next day. It says Invictus in it. That's the name of the yacht. And I don't. You know, I don't think that kind of pride is a bad thing. Like, I don't.

[Barry Rothbart]

I don't either.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm at the track all week. Tons of people come up to my car. Cause it's kind of recognizable historically. My name's on the car. People come by and they go, oh, hey, man, could we get a picture? I didn't know this was your car, you know? And then, you know, at some point they'll go, are you driving? I'll go, yeah, I'm going out this afternoon. And they'll go, oh, that's so cool. And then I feel a little bit good, you know? And it's not about dominion over them or power or anything. I just. It feels good. I just use that as an example.

[Barry Rothbart]

I do think life becomes a lot easier when you start to look at what it is that certain people Want more than anything else. And that explains them. Like, if you start to look at famous people as people who want fame more than other people.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Barry Rothbart]

Or I just never valued. I value money. I would love to have money, but it's never been a huge, huge, top motivation. I wouldn't have been a standup comedian if it was. You know, it's never been. And I think for a lot of people, there is a drive to be like, whatever that huge drive is. It's definitely not an easier life because I could imagine Rick Caruso's life is like a nightmare of sorts for certain people. If you plugged a certain person into that life, they'd be like, I can't handle this.

[Adam Carolla]

I literally felt. I can't remember if I was talking about talking to Leno on the air, but I felt bad because he called me about something, some favor he needed. I helped him out. And then I just thinking of him the other day before I went to the track and I said, I love.

[Barry Rothbart]

That you call it the track. It's hard for me not to think.

[Adam Carolla]

Of you going to like the dog track. It's a racetrack. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But before I go to Laguna Seca, it's car weekend. So I call Jay and I just go, hey, Jay, you coming out? Cause he always comes out for car weekend. He'll go to the lawn where all the, you know, where the concourse is, but he'll go by the tracks, hang out, so on and so forth. And he just was like, not in a good way. And he was just like, you know, it's like every 10ft someone stops me and wants a tour of the garage because everyone gets a tour of his garage. And he's super generous with it. But the word's kind of gotten out that he's real generous with the tour and everyone wants the tour and charities auction off the tour of his garage. And yeah, I just did a thing where it's like, I give you a tour. Me and Leno tours garage for charity. And it went for like 15 grand or something. It's great and he's magnanimous and everything, but he was clearly just tired and his wife is ill and he's got these late night jack off guys busting his chops about saying, why do we have to get into politics? Johnny Carson, they all go after Leno and he's just like, I felt bad. And it was like, yeah, he's a guy who has a bunch of stuff and we're all aware of it and it's a burden to him because he can't go onto the lawn at pebble beach with the throngs of humanity and just walk and look at cars.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, Hell yeah, you can. You hire mayhem. I'll just be putting everybody the fuck away.

[Adam Carolla]

You have to stop. Everyone has to stop him. And then they have to go, my daughter is a charity. Don't give a shit.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Get out of the way.

[Barry Rothbart]

I've never been able to. I'm not. I'm not that famous, so I've never been able to understand that. I know, but, yeah, every time I hear it, I'm always like, that would be. I know this is not true, but I was like, that would be a good problem to have. I don't know. I. I know that's not true.

[Adam Carolla]

It's not a good. Well, I don't know that it's a problem. Well, first off, it's. It's like. I don't know, it's like saying somebody married you for your money. Oh, I'll take that problem. I mean, it is a problem. What I'm saying is he likes being Jay Leno. He likes being famous, but he loves cars, he loves car weekend. And it was too big a hassle for him. He didn't want to deal with it.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I get it.

[Adam Carolla]

And I feel bad because I would be crushed if I couldn't go enjoy that that weekend is basically what I'm saying.

[Barry Rothbart]

I totally understand that. And also, side note, Jay Leno is a great guy. I did the Tonight show, and he's motivated by, I think, three things. Cars, performing, standup, and denim. That guy gets in and out of denim quicker than anyone I've ever seen.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I did kind of want to say, like, you shouldn't dress up in a Jay Leno denim. Don't use denim contact lenses, Jay. If you want to fly under the radar, there's a way to dress. But he.

[Barry Rothbart]

When I did the Tonight Show, I was so nervous. It was my first late night show. And he came into the makeup room and we just chatted about stand up. You know, I did Conan. He was nice, but he wasn't, like, very friendly. Yeah, Leno just loves talking to comics. Loves talking about stand up. He loves performing. I think that guy loves performing more than most comics I've ever met. He just loves the act of telling jokes in such a pure way.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, he does. Yeah, he absolutely does. And he's. He called me to ask if he could use one of my jokes and stuff, like, which is something. That's weird.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Were you still using it or his old joke?

[Adam Carolla]

I never. I never used it.

[Barry Rothbart]

You want to tell it?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I don't know what it is. No, I know what it is. I never did it in stand up. Although I should do it in stand up. I don't know if he ever ended up doing it and Stan it. But it was basically the concept of. This is years and years ago, but it was basically the concept of when men. You go to a strip club and you look at the women and it's a fantasy, and it's. Women come out and they're dressed in lingerie. They're basically dressed like prostitutes, and then they get naked, but there is no theme. But women go to a strip club and watch men strip, and they come out as firemen and cops and lawyers and whatever, and then they get naked. Because a big part of the fantasy is. Has a job. Like, this guy's working, and I'm looking at his cock, but he works. I prefer my strippers joke.

[Barry Rothbart]

You shouldn't have given it to him.

[Adam Carolla]

It's conceptually good. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, the concept is good. Like part of the fantasies.

[Barry Rothbart]

They don't want to fuck some guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Who doesn't have a job as a kid. We don't care what the fuck she does. She just gets. Well, we know what she does. Her job's getting naked. I think we like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So again, the fantasy, it would be really funny if.

[Barry Rothbart]

Fully employed, stripper coming out as like.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Like a raconteur.

[Adam Carolla]

It's like a fireman or something. Yeah. Be confusing.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Hell yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, listen, I'm gonna go to the closet. Really think about this for a minute. So.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, that's fun.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's a good joke. It is. It is a fun thing when someone's like, hey, can I use that joke that you're like, you don't tell anymore. And then your PC was like, man, that was a good joke. Should I start doing that again?

[Adam Carolla]

I know when Leno wants a joke, you go, well, maybe that was a good joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't even do. I didn't even do it. He just heard me talking, like, oh.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, there's a conversational joke.

[Adam Carolla]

No, it's like we're on a podcast radio show, and I was just, you know, I was just riffing.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I've done that. I stole someone's conversational joke. Wasn't a comic.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I. Yeah, what about that? How does. What's. Does that count? As stealing a joke about the rules right now.

[Barry Rothbart]

I had this terror. I mean, it's not a terrible joke. It's a stupid joke. But it. The joke was like, what's the most confusing way to order chickpeas at a restaurant? You go, chickpeas. And my friend just this guy I knew just said it. And I was just like, I should try that. And I just did it on stage. This was when I was just doing.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, yeah, whatever, stupid jokes. Check, please. Sorry.

[Barry Rothbart]

And he would. And. And he found out, like, I did it on. On my Comedy Central presents. And he saw it. He was like, that's so cool. We talked about that. And I felt bad. I felt bad. But I also was like, I don't feel that bad. He's not a comic.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, yeah. See, my non comic friends, like, we all talk shit on the damn Call of Duty. And then I inevitably steal their jokes. You do just blatantly right to their face and say, yeah, I stole it. What are you gonna do about it?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, it's different with comics.

[Adam Carolla]

When you're hanging out with comics, I have a deeper thought, but maybe it's an internal thing, which is I worry about wasted ability and wasted potential. I don't. Like, I feel compelled to do stuff. Cause I feel like I have potential to do it. And to not attempt to exploit that potential is a wasted life.

[Barry Rothbart]

You're saying that that's what motivates you?

[Adam Carolla]

I think what motivates a lot of these guys and including myself, is they go, what else? What else could we be doing here? We're all kind of on the clock. And they want to know.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's really interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

They kind of go like, Rick Caruso's like, well, I got a 214 foot yacht. I got everything I need. What if I was governor? You know what I mean? I think that's what Trump does. Trump goes, what do I need? More golf, More whatever. More tuft, you know, more gold plating. Like, I want to fucking run. I want to run the world.

[Barry Rothbart]

I think there's also, like, whatever fear gets you moving is probably the thing that motivates you deep down too, you know? Like, for me, it's the fear of getting stuck. I have this huge fear that I will run out of options financially, career wise, everything, and I will just be stuck. And that fear is what motivates me above all else to do more, to constantly be like, there's an option. I'm not gonna just fall apart. There's six things I could be worried. That's why I take on too much shit. But wasted potential is really interesting. I think that's like a really interesting concept. I think about that, too.

[Adam Carolla]

I think mostly what got me into comedy was a sort of wasted potential theorem.

[Barry Rothbart]

For you?

[Adam Carolla]

For me?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, I was probably.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's so interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, sort of stacking drywall on a construction site going, I think I'm a comedic genius. I think I have, like, a comedic savant. Like, I think I'm a comedic savant. Really? Yeah.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I did back then on stacking that.

[Adam Carolla]

You believe I would listen to all these fucking jack offs on the radio and I just go, funnier than him. Funnier than him. Funnier than him. Funnier than him. As a matter of fact, I never had any. I would, you know, I'd show up. First time I did Howard Stern, I'm like, funnier than him. Yeah, that's what I believed. And so I. Not in a bizarre or arrogant way, just like in a Jon Jonesy Octagon kind of way. Like, I'll kick his ass and I'll kick his ass, and I'll kick his ass and then his ass.

[Barry Rothbart]

I watched Craig Coburn and I was like, this guy's a show, right? I'm funnier than this guy.

[Adam Carolla]

I get the same thing. He wasn't. I'm always like, what the hell?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

John Henson.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, John Henson. Craig. You know what I'm talking about.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Love that guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Craig, all right. Craig Kilborn had a show for a reason, which is the same reason. That's an interesting thing that people should know and don't. But as long as we run up, I brought up Stern and then you brought up Craig Kilborn. So then I'll weave that tale.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, please.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, so there is David Letterman. David Letterman is not Leno. He's not a nice guy guy at all. And he's a talented guy, but he's not a nice guy. And he at some point had a choice as to who would go at 12:30 after him. He's going to go 11:30 to 12:30. Then who's coming on after him? Well, the choice and the assumed direction that this was going to go and things were in place was a kid by the name of Jon Stewart.

[Barry Rothbart]

I see.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, Jon Stewart is good looking, funny as shit, and just a ball of talent. And you think Jon Stewart's funny, or maybe your mom does or your dad did. But I'll tell you who knows, Jon Stewart's funny, and that's David Letterman. Do you want a guy who's Younger than you, better looking than you, and maybe funnier than you. Going after you.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Is that what you want? Because now. Yeah, you don't want Steve Young on the bench. Now, your contract comes up in three years, and we're going to renegotiate. And somebody goes, you want, you know, $32 million a year. Jon Stewart would do it for six. And you know what? We like you, but not for that much.

[Barry Rothbart]

I didn't know that.

[Adam Carolla]

That was amazing. So let's put unlikable and unfunny Craig Kilmer. Who do you think Letterman thought Craig Kilburn was funny? I don't know. I mean, I was not likable or anything. I'm not even talking about that. Guy goes behind you, and he stays there for perpetuity. I was supposed to be on the Howard Stern Network. This podcast was supposed to be on the Howard Stern Network, and I was gonna do it for free. And they called and they set the whole thing up, but it got canceled at the last second, and they never told me why. But Howard Stern did know I was funny. And we ended up with Bubba the Love Sponge or whatever, crazy black guy who likes UFOs. And you would sit there and go, what the fuck? If you like Howard Stern, why the fuck would you like crazy black guy who believes in Sasquatch or Bubba the Love Sponge? Yeah. Well, if you like Letterman, why would you like Kilbourne? You certainly wouldn't like Kilborn if you like Letterman. But Letterman liked Kilbourne because he didn't want Jon Stewart there.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's like, you know, it's sad, but it's like an opener on the road.

[Adam Carolla]

It's tactical.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, a lot of people do that.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You're.

[Adam Carolla]

You're. Listen, you're making business moves here, people. It's not all art.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I just like to say I'm opening for Craig Kilborn coming up soon.

[Adam Carolla]

So you don't want to bring. How does that work? The openers?

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, I. I'm not saying I do this. I prefer bringing someone I like hanging out with.

[Adam Carolla]

Honestly, I think that's super unfunny. Yeah, I guess.

[Barry Rothbart]

So. They can't be funny in the same way I'm funny.

[Adam Carolla]

It's when the guy up goes up before you and is crushing. It's like, it's something to think about.

[Barry Rothbart]

It makes your life a little harder, but it also makes you better. So I don't know. I, I. But I've known a lot of comics who are like. And the thing Is when you start out, you're. And you want to be a feature, you want to be an opener. You're always like, like, look how funny I am. Look, you gotta be nice to hang out with, have a car if you want to start being an opener. Having a car is huge. And then the other thing is, yeah, you just, you gotta be funny, but not in the, not in a way where people are throwing chairs around the room and you're like, you know, it's that raucous but funny in a different way than the guy you're opening for.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I'm gonna say this in parlance for mayhem over here as he can.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Understand Kilborn 2025 tour. Check me out.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, if you got a guy who's fighting before you and he's doing three two minute rounds, he can be an all action fighter and a crowd pleaser. If you're doing five, five minute rounds, you gotta pace yourself a little bit. And so the guy goes on before you, he might not even be a better fighter. But it's all action for 15 minutes, right? You gotta go out there and do an hour, so you ain't coming out throwing fucking haymakers. You can't come out all action for an hour. So not only.

[Barry Rothbart]

Unless you're Dane Cook, unless you're Dane.

[Adam Carolla]

Cook, not only is that guy, even if that guy isn't funnier than you, he's taken his best 15 and shotgunning it all out there. Whereas you're pacing yourself for an hour and 10 minutes.

[Barry Rothbart]

And you know, if you're at the level where you've done tv, a lot of your, you know, this guy might have been working on these jokes for 10 years. And you're doing a new hour, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The whole strategy for Opener, I thought was like to sort of give everybody a few good laughs but then kind of end on like, aha, you're here to see this guy. That's how I view it.

[Adam Carolla]

They end on the thing like that. They go out big.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's unspoken. It's kind of an unspoken thing. But I think a lot of, a lot of headliners are like, I want to get someone who's good, but not like you said with Letterman and bands.

[Adam Carolla]

Perfect rock bands do that all the time. They don't want to be blown off the stage by some up and coming Guns N Roses or something. And it's 1984 or something and people haven't heard of them and they just fucking go blow everyone away like, who the hell wants that?

[Barry Rothbart]

I was opening For Brad Garrett briefly, many years ago. And he's a crowdwear comic. And the first night I did some crowd work and he came to me after. He's like, don't do any crowd. But if you want to ask people questions, that's fine. But you don't do any crowd work because it's his thing. And I was like, I get it.

[Adam Carolla]

I could see the ask people questions with no crowd work. Where are you guys from? Yeah. Wisconsin. There you go.

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, then you would have.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, there you go. What about you? What do you do for a living? Civil engineer.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, cool.

[Adam Carolla]

All right then. Okay.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I've seen comics.

[Adam Carolla]

What else? You're laughing, but that's done. I do that too. And I'm like, what are we doing here?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah. And then Brad would be like, you.

[Adam Carolla]

Know, writing it down. Talking about Tony Baloney. Or are we talking about Brad? Tony Baloney. I love those ads. I miss them. Yeah. So there's a part where you. Yeah. You want to know why Craig Kilborn was on after Letterman. And you would have much. I know that you would have much more enjoyed a 36 year old Jon Stewart. And Letterman knows you much would have enjoyed him much more.

[Barry Rothbart]

Absolutely.

[Adam Carolla]

And that's why he's not there.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. I also watched Letterman and Conan and I was like, I could do what they do. Which is crazy because they're the most talented people ever.

[Adam Carolla]

Sorry, Conan and Letterman. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think I. I think you have to have a little bit of that. Morgan and Morgan. All right, let's get real for a minute. Everyone talks about summer being sunshine, backyard barbecues, but you know as well as I do, summer's also prime time for accidents. Every slip by the pool maybe got rear ended on the way to the beach. That's why you need to know about Morgan and Morgan. These are good dudes. They're nice guys. They're funny. I've interviewed them a few times and they brought in more than 25 billion. That's 25 billion with a B for clients just like you. I'm talking real stories. One Guy got offered 500 grand for his injury, ended up with 29 million bucks thanks to Morgan and Morgan. That's why they're America's largest injury law firm. Right, Dawson?

[Producer or Announcer]

Hiring the wrong firm can be disastrous. Hiring the right firm could substantially increase your settlement with Morgan and Morgan. It's easy to get started and their fee is free unless they win. Just Visit for the people.com Adam or dial pound law. £529. That's for the people.com Adam or Dial pound law £529. This is a paid advertisement.

[Commercial Announcer]

This summer, Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cop, Good Burger and Transformers. Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto TV Stream now pay never.

[Adam Carolla]

That it doesn't. I wasn't delusional. Like I listened. All I did was listen to morning radio in la, driving a truck, working on construction sites because construction is morning radio hours. Like other people. Oh, they listen to 40 minutes on their commute but they don't hear it on the way back and they don't hear it at the office. I go for. I would be getting into my truck at 6:15, 6:10. That's when they were going on the air. I'd get to the job site at 7 and I put on the radio when it got on the job site and go all the way through at 10 o'. Clock. It's time for Dusty street to come in and do the 12 o' clock funnies or whatever. I'd go all the way through until I got back in my truck again at 3:30. Cause all you had was the radio. And then you didn't have any boss or anyone like coming up to you going, hey, we need the Jenkins account. Now get to work. You know, you're just on your feet, you know. And I listened to Mark and Brian and Kevin and Bean and Rick D's and these guys and making tens of thousands of dollars, hundreds of thousands, millions of dollars. And I sat there and went, I'm fucking funnier in all these guys. And then I got on the radio and then I was so I wasn't. You can kind of call it what you want. I was kind of accurate. I was like, look, I don't want to be delusional. I don't want to go into this and then find out Rick D's is 10 times funnier than me or Mark and Brian are 10 times funnier than me. I don't want to get chewed up and spat out, but I know I'm funnier than these guys. And then I went on and you.

[Barry Rothbart]

Had the work ethic, which a lot of people don't have.

[Adam Carolla]

No. I was like, you're not walking off this construction site and into klos. That's not going to work. You're going to have to start training of people.

[Barry Rothbart]

They're like I'm funnier than those guys, but they're like, man, construction's easier.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, the good news is it wasn't easier, but it was familiar.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

No, but I. I was like, I'm funnier than these people, and then I'll just go work at it, and then maybe I can prove them. And then when. When I did show up, I was funnier than them. And so it. It, like, again, is it braggadocious? Is it delusional? Like, what is. Wasn't even self confidence. I was just being. I was being pragmatic in my mind.

[Barry Rothbart]

What you have to put up with to do comedy and to get into the entertainment business, the hell that you have to put up with, you have to be believe. Like, if you don't believe, it is. It's dark, man.

[Adam Carolla]

I didn't believe. I never believed in an outcome. I just believe ability that I had more ability than them.

[Barry Rothbart]

I thought that I was like, I'm funnier than any comic I've seen until I saw Dave Attell and that guy. I listened to his album Skanks for the Memories, and I was like, I'll never be this funny. So I just kind of stole his thing for a little while. This was, like my first year. And a lot of comics do this. They'll find a comic and they're just like, that is the funniest. And they'll just kind of do them. I didn't do his jokes, but I kind of did his essence. And people, like, a guy came up to me after, he was like, you're doing Dave Attell. Don't do that. Don't steal someone's thing. I was like, yeah, that's a good point. But when I found someone who I was like, I'll never be this guy. The instinct was to be like, well, maybe just steal what he does.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, listen, people always talk about inspiration, but feeling like I could never do that is not inspiration.

[Barry Rothbart]

No, no.

[Adam Carolla]

And I did feel that way. I would watch Dennis Miller and go, can't do that.

[Barry Rothbart]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, because he's a. Yeah, it's a source, and he's spitting it out a mile a minute. Omar Gaddafi. Yeah. I couldn't remember all. Like, I couldn't remember an hour of that rat a tat.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Well, how about a Dennis Leary? Like, where you're just rattling off.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, that's different. That's ADHD or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I could.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You know, I think every performer, Every comedian. Right, you're right. Well, every comedian has their own voice that they find.

[Adam Carolla]

Sure. No I get it. But what I'm saying is, if I went to see Brad Garrett and he did crowd work for an hour, I could watch him and go, I could see myself pulling that off. That's your thing, huh? If I went and saw Dennis Miller get up there and rattle off an hour worth of words I couldn't pronounce, then I would think I couldn't do that.

[Barry Rothbart]

I feel that way about impressions. Comics do impressions. I can't.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but that's essentially impressions is sort of like being double jointed juggling, as you know, you can't do it. Well, no, because you can teach someone to juggling.

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, you think it's innate. It's like you bore it.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, it's 100% innate. Really? I wonder what that is.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I've tried.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I don't know. I just think if you make a lot of voices when you're a little kid, it's the same. Like, I always bring them back to fights. Because if you go, look, if I put a kid who wrestled his whole life, right, but now he's been boxing for the last five years in a tough fight, he'll go back to wrestling. He'll just suddenly. Yeah, it's something, you know, that he developed as a child. And same thing with like, I watched Godfrey blow my mind with how variety, you know, so many different characters going at one time just electrified me recently. And I said, man, you know, I got taste of. I can make certain voices. But this guy has done it since he was a kid. There's no way around it. He really developed that so early that his palate is flexible and molds and shifts.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. I disagree. Well, first off, you can always tell him, do your Brock Lesnar, get back in there. I mean, you're doing Macho man pretty good.

[Barry Rothbart]

Macho man, right?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Macho man need a little excitement. Step into a Slim Jim.

[Adam Carolla]

The whole. Okay, there's certain. Look, I know a guy who can take his tongue and turn it into a taco shell. Just goes up, makes a capital U, right? And that same guy can also roll his tongue. I mean, literally, like a wave goes down his tongue. And then you go. And he can take his tongue and flip it over. Flip it over.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I gotta go to the closet real quick.

[Adam Carolla]

And then there's me. What can I do with my tongue? And then I go, try to flip it over. And I'm like, oh, I can't.

[Barry Rothbart]

I can't do it.

[Adam Carolla]

There are a lot of people who make their tongue go to a Point. I don't know even what it is, is it. 30% of people can do it. You make. Let's see. Yeah, but that's curl.

[Barry Rothbart]

I could hold my.

[Adam Carolla]

Can you do it like.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I got this one.

[Barry Rothbart]

I'll show you this.

[Adam Carolla]

There's. Oh, you can turn it over.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, Yeah, I can hold my pinky in my hand. Oh, isn't that bizarre?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that is weird.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, that's a weird thing.

[Adam Carolla]

What I'm saying is, it's not because you started doing it when you were a kid. It's just a thing. The impressions are a thing. It's a gift. Oh, Dawson can do the.

[Barry Rothbart]

No, he's not doing it the.

[Adam Carolla]

It's got a little me coming out there. Yeah. Not yours.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Looks uncircumcised.

[Barry Rothbart]

It looks like I'm, like, holding a dirty, different person's finger. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Well, the skill of the voice is. Is a gift. Yeah, it's a gift. And. And they. They got it when they were young, and they did it when they were young, and they could do it. They do it, and I can't do it.

[Barry Rothbart]

Everything I do is a version of a New York accent.

[Adam Carolla]

And you. Yeah, I don't do it. I can't do it. But I. You know.

[Barry Rothbart]

Where are we going?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I work. You choose.

[Barry Rothbart]

Anytime I'm doing an impression.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So I worked with a lot of guys and sketch and stuff, and they could do it and other guys can't. And it's a gift, so there's no doubt about that. But let's. I mean, in a weird way, the folks that have the gift. You can't compare yourself to the gift people because that fucking ship sailed a long time ago. Like, if you could do voices, you would have known it by the time you were nine. And you can't. And you can work on it all you want, but it's not even worth it. You can work on stand up, you can work on comedy in general. You can work on lots and lots of stuff, but you can't really work on that. Oh, by the way, I'll tell you what. You can work your ass off for 10 years and be one tenth as good as Godfrey. Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Do you think that's the same with being genuinely funny? You're either born with it or not.

[Adam Carolla]

I do think. I do think that. And I also think that there are plenty of comedians who probably know they're not what you would call gifted, let's say. And I sometimes think about how that must make them feel when they have to sort of Enter the room kind of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And my. Because I never really thought about it. You know what I never thought about? But I've talked to Dr. Drew about recently a lot, which is insecurities. And I was sort of marveling with Dr. Drew at how many people, as adults or in sort of modern America, I realize who they go, like, oh, you think I'm dumb. You think I'm dumb, don't you? Or you disrespect to me because he doesn't think I'm. You know, and they start talking about what you think, and you think I'm dumb, or you think I'm no good. You think I'm lazy, man, or whatever. And I was saying to Dr. Drew, what is going on with this? Because I've never said to anybody, accuse them of disrespecting me or thinking I'm lazy or thinking I'm worthless or feeling attacked, stupid, or whatever. And then I sort of realized, conveniently, maybe, but I can build a house. So I have a sort of security and sort of a knowledge that you get with a skill. Like, guys who have skills, women, when you have, like, a skill base, like, there's just. You can do something. Well, I get it.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And you have a kind of base of security. Like, well, I can build a house, and I can do things, but. And I would go, you know, like, I listened to Howard Stern. I loved Howard Stern. I was like, anybody with Howard Stern. But the first time I did Howard Stern show, I wasn't intimidated. I'm like, I'm funnier than he is, so I'll just sit here and be funnier than he is. And I was.

[Barry Rothbart]

I see what you're saying. You need, like, a throw caution to the wind vibe, too.

[Adam Carolla]

But what would it like to be walking around feeling like an imposter? Like, almost like, I don't really know anything. I've never excelled at anything. Like, I'm not really gifted at anything. Like, what am I. What am I doing here? And then, yeah, I guess you would get defensive if somebody did something. You think I'm stupid. Like, I would never say it to anyone, because I don't think I'm stupid. I don't think they think I'm stupid.

[Barry Rothbart]

You know, I think when I. When I feel that. When I feel that imposter syndrome, and I'm like, in a room with comics, and I'm like, that guy's funnier than me. I want to be better. Whatever goes off in my head is like, I need to work harder to get.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's a good. And that's a good expression of that feeling. And there's a negative. There's a got beat in the fight, gonna get up, learn from my mistakes, and dust myself off and come back stronger and train harder. And then there's. I'm going drinking. There are two versions of what we could do, which I've done. That experience. Yeah. And everyone's had those moments. But what I'm saying is, yeah, it's good. It's good to kind of go get humbled a little bit and go, you know, I should have worked on this more and focus a little harder and so on and so forth.

[Barry Rothbart]

I do think funny is a born thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah. No, it is.

[Barry Rothbart]

I think it's like, you know, you look at, like, a Will Ferrell and whatever you think about him.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

I don't think he even knows why he's so funny. He's just funny. He's just a funny.

[Adam Carolla]

I agree to chalk it up to, oh, his dad was funny, or he had a miserable childhood, and this is what he used to defend himself, you know, or, you know, he's a military brat, and they would go to. They would go to new schools, and he didn't want to get bullied, so he used humor as a defense, you know, like a bullfucking shit bullshit.

[Barry Rothbart]

The nepotism thing. Up to a point.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

I know so many comics who came from extraordinary wealth, and I'm just like, if they weren't funny, they wouldn't be big. You know, like, you get to a certain point from. From having every advantage, but you still gotta be funny, you know, like, there's. You can't replace that.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I agree. And I think, unfortunately, it's a inherent sort of gift, and it's also a thing that's sort of just built in. And we understand it when it pertains to music. You know, every drummer you talk to, any drummer, you talk to Tommy Lee. Like, how'd you start? Well, I was 6. I started banging on pots and pans. You know, every drummer was banging on pots and pans. And then at some point, they got a drum kit. And then there was no looking back after that. So you go, well, what was that? I go, well, that's Tommy Lee. He's here to drum.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean? And there's that way with. With singing and with dance and with. Like, they love this, or they're artists or whatever. It's the same with comedy, but we don't really recognize it, which is weird. It's like they. Comedy's the only gift people try to talk you out of. You know what I mean? It's like no one else goes, you know what? I really love kids. No, you don't. I do. I love kids. I want to work around kids. Not, not. Don't do that, don't do that. Your dad says no, I just. I love kids. I love.

[Barry Rothbart]

More people embrace sword swallowers than comedians.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, it's like your dad was a sword swallower. You should be.

[Barry Rothbart]

You're so right. Yeah. It's a very strange thing.

[Adam Carolla]

I was a comedian my whole life and I had people yelling at me, shut up, shut up, shut up. You know what I mean? So if you're telling a comedian to shut up, then you're basically saying, I'm trying to yell you out of your gift. You know what I mean?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, but it's so one of the weird things about comedy is it's one of the only, like, art forms or professions where if you've succeeded in something else, they just allow you to do it.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah, right.

[Barry Rothbart]

Like, it's like if someone's famous from anything else, they're just allowed to tour and do stand up. It's like it's never reversed. Right. It's like, right, If Obama wanted to do stand up and headline any weekend, he would be allowed to headline any weekend. But people can't go be politicians just because they're famous. Being something else. Yeah, it's a strange thing. And they allow people to do this all the time. Gronkowski, he did a stand up special.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, he did, yeah, yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Just because he wanted to, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I mean, some of that is that the genre has been stretched and morphed in so many different shapes that what is stand up anymore? You know, it ends up being an evening with Gronk. You know what I mean? So it's like, what's gonna tell some stories, it's gonna show some pictures?

[Barry Rothbart]

How hard could it be? I'm just gon talk, you know, I talk for an hour.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. But you know, I started doing live podcasts like 16 years ago. No one even knew what the fucking live podcast was. But now it's accepted. It's a live podcast. Yeah, you have to have one. What is this guy doing? Well, he's not doing stand up, but it's funny, but he's standing up, but it's not really, you know, and so now you can do that. I mean, I'm gonna go out and do a show with Megyn Kelly in a few months, and she's gonna get out there and she's gonna tell some funny stories, and she's gonna get some laughs, and then I'm gonna come out and I'm gonna do some time, and then I'll interview her, she'll interview me, and then what will it be? You know what I mean? Is it standup? Is it an evening with Megyn Kelly?

[Barry Rothbart]

She's hilarious.

[Adam Carolla]

She can be. She can talk, I can tell you that.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's fun, though. And people will come out for that.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I mean. And so there is no more. It's really. You know what it is. You know what's going on with comedy? What's going on with comedy is what used to go on with music, where they just go, look, David Soule from Starsky and Hutch. Yeah. You got hit show. Yeah. Can you sing? No. That's all right. Come on, let's make an album. Let's go make an album. You got Shatner cutting albums. You got Spock is cutting albums. David Soule's cutting albums. Hey, you're on tv. Hasselhoff. Get out in here, you make an album.

[Barry Rothbart]

Or a cookbook.

[Adam Carolla]

Or cookbook in an out. Well, ladies do a cookbook. Dudes were singing, right? And before you know it, you got John Travolta cutting albums.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Right. Okay, so how did that. Well, now it's that way with stand up.

[Barry Rothbart]

Well, if you know what it is, it's a very quick way to monetize fame.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Podcasts, Stand up. If you're famous, they're guys right to the money.

[Adam Carolla]

No, guys like Piven. Jeremy Piven, who I like. He's gone. Look, I'm an actor, and I'm a comedic actor, and everyone knows who I am, and I'm gonna go out, make some money, and I'm gonna start doing standup. But he works at it, and he works at doing standup, and he doesn't just go out there and go, hey, man, let's. Let's talk about PCU or whatever the hell he's been.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

200.

[Barry Rothbart]

But he must be afforded some advantages being Jeremy Piven.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you get to get booked because people know who your name is, but you hit a single name is. But he worked on it as well and is working on it, you know, like, where he went. You know what? I'm gonna approach this like acting, and I'm gonna start working on it.

[Barry Rothbart]

One year, I was at jfl, and I got bumped off a show for Blake Griffin, the NBA Player.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

He was doing stand up, and I was so mad. I was like, what the. He's not even a comic. And they were like, why wouldn't they do that?

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Barry Rothbart]

Like, why wouldn't the bookers do that? They have no incentive not to do that. Like, he's gonna be the thing everyone.

[Adam Carolla]

Talks about, you know?

[Barry Rothbart]

It's like, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Wait a minute. What's jfl? Sir?

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, sorry, Just for last.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, just for. Oh, JFL in my jfl.

[Barry Rothbart]

And I think everyone knows it, but. Yeah, just relax. Montreal.

[Adam Carolla]

I should know it, but sorry. Yeah. Because when you said bumped off of.

[Barry Rothbart]

I was bumped off a show.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, but, like, you weren't already there, were you?

[Barry Rothbart]

I. No, it was a show during the festival that I was on.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I thought it was an airline the whole time.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, they fly to Newark. Not jfl. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For some reason, I pictured local, like, night of walked out, but okay. Yeah, no, yeah, but he was. He could be funny. I did a roast with him, by the way.

[Barry Rothbart]

He's funny in the way an athlete is. You know, it's like. It's like when you put Kareem Abdul Jabbar an airplane, it's like, oh, wow, that guy can play basketball and speak.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I would say it's a big difference between doing standup and doing a roast. A roast is. They line it all up for you. You got good writers writing good roast jokes, and then you have to just, you know, read the prompter, and you.

[Barry Rothbart]

Get a lot of benefit of the doubt if you're Blake Griffin, you know?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. All right. I'm not shitting on Blake Griffin.

[Barry Rothbart]

I think he's a great guy.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I don't have any. I don't have anything bad to say about him. As a matter of fact, I was prescient with my Blake Griffin things because I did a roast and I was going on after Blake, and they teed up all these how much Blake Griffin's roast suck jokes for me. And I was like, I don't know that he's going to suck.

[Barry Rothbart]

They told you that he was gonna suck.

[Adam Carolla]

They just went, here's the order. You go on after Blake.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, I see.

[Adam Carolla]

So our first three jokes are gonna be how much Blake sucked and he should stuck to basketball and whatever it is. And I said, I don't know that he's gonna suck.

[Barry Rothbart]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

And if he goes up there and he's got good jokes that someone else wrote and he does a good job of delivering them, then he's not gonna suck. And then I'm gonna have my first three jokes not make any fucking sense. Cause he just did good. And ironically, he will have done better than my first three jokes. Cause my jokes won't make sense. Yeah. And he went up there and he crushed it. And I've sat there going, I'm glad my jokes aren't about him sucking.

[Barry Rothbart]

Sure.

[Adam Carolla]

That's great.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. And we forget that athletes are human beings, too. And we're like, I can't believe that person could just do something else in addition to dunk a ball.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Barry Rothbart]

They could be a little.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I'm an animal.

[Adam Carolla]

Check that. All right. I got a thing we cut up. It's a little car race thing that we cut up. It's about 90 seconds that people have been sharing on the Internet. And we'll do a. We'll put together a better vlog and a longer vlog of this. Of we talk about the track a few dozen times. Headed to the track. I'll show people a little highlight reel of the Track. It's on YouTube. And you can also see. You can see if people are trying to kill me or not.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, bud.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, wow.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Swapping some paint right there.

[Barry Rothbart]

You're racing against my uncle's car.

[Adam Carolla]

Ours. That's right. So you have a Cortina.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, we. Oh, my God. Flying up over that curb. Oh, man.

[Barry Rothbart]

You're booking it.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

People think it's like a celebrity race or something.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

It's not a go kart. That is a. Oh, my goodness.

[Barry Rothbart]

Is this your car? You own it?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Back there. Yeah, that's right. It's in the trailer, actually. It's got. Just got. Just got back, by the way. But this is what it looks like from inside the car. So I'm trying to. Trying to tell everybody.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's scary. It's disorienting.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, I like it.

[Adam Carolla]

It is. It's good that you don't think about anything, but.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

But. But this. All right. You can tell me if this guy's trying to take me out or not when I get along side.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

He gave a little.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't think he saw me. Or maybe he did. I don't.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Overtake this guy.

[Caller or Guest]

Oh.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, this guy sees me.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, he sees you. Almost ran you off the road right there.

[Adam Carolla]

There's a little. Little that. But something was spun out on the track. That's. He almost hit the guy on the track. But don't worry, I'll catch up. Wow.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I like this wind sound.

[Barry Rothbart]

This thing has Good mileage.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. Good warranty, good mileage, good everything.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, man, what a race.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, it's fun.

[Barry Rothbart]

That was great.

[Adam Carolla]

It's crazy, but. But it's good in that you don't think about anything.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. You're not scared at all. I'm racing so far into me. I watch F1, but.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, that is super fast. This is not. This is only fast because the technology is so old and so bad. You know, I would tell people all the time, we go, how fast do you go? I go, well, listen, when you get on Southwest flight, you go 550 miles an hour and you sit there and you drink a Miller Light. But if I put you in a shopping cart and push you down a hill and you went 21 miles an hour, you'd be freaking the fuck out, right? So I said, it's a little more of the shopping cart. You know what I mean?

[Barry Rothbart]

And that's the type of racing you do is. What do you even call those cars?

[Adam Carolla]

Those are. No, I do everything. You do everything. But those are B sedans is what they call them. B sedans, which is this like little dinky BMW 2002s, Alfa Romeo GTAs and GTVs, like from the 60s. Datsun 510s.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's fun.

[Adam Carolla]

Little shit boxy, hollowed out cars. And everyone who drives them is a little bit nuts. Cause they like that stuff. Like, they like the little stuff that they can go nuts with.

[Barry Rothbart]

How you fixed up a carburetor or something like that they're into.

[Adam Carolla]

Not really caring how close they are to anybody. They don't really care if they're next to you. There's one guy was behind for three laps and I kept coming up right up on him. And he was nudging me. And I was looking at his car and I noticed it was damaged on that part of his car. And I was like, oh, this guy's done this. They discourage you from making contact, but they don't really. They don't give you any room to pass or anything like that. And I don't know if they cut you off, but they kind of do. Like, they're aggressive, I guess.

[Barry Rothbart]

Have you driven in an F1 car?

[Adam Carolla]

No, the biggest I've driven is a trans AM GT1, like a Super fast, actually. It probably has more horsepower than an F1 car, but. Yeah, because F1, I don't know. Because they make a lot of rules with F1, and I don't know what. You can look it up, Andrea. What A modern day F1 car has horsepower wise, but not as much as you might think. Like it's not unlimited. Yeah, it's a lot of aerodynamics and a lot of. A lot of technology, but not unlimited horsepower. They limit it. Like a ZR1 street Corvette has more horsepower than a NASCAR does. Because a NASCAR, they limit you. They do it. A modern F1 car produces 1,000 horsepower. Wow.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That's what I was thinking.

[Adam Carolla]

That's more. That's a lot more than I thought I thought it'd be be I don't know, 6 to 700. But either way the car I've shown had like 933 horsepower or something. Something like that. Which a lot. But it weighs a lot more than a nascar so that's terrifying. And those cars don't have much horsepower. They just don't weigh anything. Yeah, that's the.

[Barry Rothbart]

Driving an old car is so fun.

[Adam Carolla]

It's fun. Driving in an old.

[Barry Rothbart]

Just a roaring shit box is just great. That's what I would love to drive. If I could just drive that every day. It's just expensive.

[Adam Carolla]

It gets you engaged, it engages you. Like you can't text because you're so busy driving.

[Barry Rothbart]

I love that.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And I agree. I don't think people get the experience of really driving.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's why I think self driving cars are never gonna be ubiquitous. It's never gonna be like everyone does self driving cars. Cause people love driving. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Except for we're talking about the low testosterone, flatlining, 18 year old porn addicted but not beating off, just staring at porn all day. You know those dudes are happy to have their food delivered and their ass delivered somewhere else. All right, break. And then some news right after this Select Quote. Time for some life talk. Life insurance talk that is, is. Look, you probably have it but you don't know what you're actually paying for, do you? And how much is your coverage? Well, odds are you're paying too much for too little coverage. And here's the scary one. If you get life insurance through work and you get laid off, you could be covered for nothing. Kind of like buying a parachute that only works, works Monday through Friday, you do all your skydiving on the weekends. That's why I'm heading to select quote to sort mine out. That's right. They're the pros. They've been at this for over 40 years. Helping over 2 million Americans secure more than 700 billion in coverage. Their mission is simple. They shop, you save. Remember, remember, life insurance is never cheaper. Than it is today. Am I right, Dawson?

[Producer or Announcer]

Life insurance is never cheaper than it is today. Life insurance is never cheaper than it is today. Get the right life insurance for you for less and save more than [e-mail] Carolla save more than 50% on term life [e-mail] Carolla today to get [e-mail].

[Adam Carolla]

Caroll O'Reilly Auto Parts, yeah, O'Reilly Auto Parts. They're in the business of keeping your car on the road, y'.

[Barry Rothbart]

All.

[Adam Carolla]

O'Reilly Auto Parts offers friendly, helpful service and the parts knowledge you need for all your maintenance and all your repairs. I always go to O'Reilly. I just got back from the track, so I had to do a lot of prep for those cars in O'Reilly. Well, that's where I go to get my parts. Always have. So whether you're a car aficionado or an auto novice, you'll find the employees at O'Reilly Auto Parts are knowledgeable, helpful and best of all, friendly. Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or you can visit us online@o'reillyauto.com Adam that's o'reillyauto.com Adam. Adam.

[Producer or Announcer]

It's time to check Adam's voicemail.

[Adam Carolla]

Hello, Mr. Carolla, this is Jade, 36, single from Phoenix. I just had to call to tell you before I forget, everything you say is genuine and and dripping with thought, intellect and literacy. You're doing the Lord's work out there. I'm a new fan, just discovered you this within the last year. And everything you say is just. You read my mind.

[Producer or Announcer]

You can leave us a message at 888-634-1744.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you. That felt good. I wanted to. Well, you got the news. We'll get to this stuff tomorrow. Go ahead. All right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Well, first up, MSNBC gets mercilessly mocked for changing his name to Ms. Now. Yeah, Ms. Paint, I think did this logo. Yeah, people are really cracking up about it, calling it most surely no one watching.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I thought rebrand that thing was confusing to me. It's like Ms. Is multiple sclerosis to me. Like that person suffers from ms, you know, and then it's Ms. Now. Sounds weird.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

They stole my website name. Mayhem now.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. My source news opinion.

[Barry Rothbart]

That looks like aarp.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it does. Yeah. I mean, look, it's never a good sign, but it doesn't not have to work. Kentucky Fried Chicken was not doing great 25 years ago and then they just went with KFC and now they Seem to be doing better. There's a lot of stuff. A lot of stuff went to the initialized version of themselves, which is kind of weird. It's a conceit that your old brand has run out of steam. And then they initialize them. I'm trying to think, what else besides KFC? It happened a lot in the 90s.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Where everybody rebranded to their. Yeah, initials only.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I know what you're talking about.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. There's a movement, right? I mean, the ones who did it right was the International House of Pancakes, because they had IHOP and they had an acronym and they were kind of both at the same time.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, my buddy has a show called the Dry Fast All Gas.

[Barry Rothbart]

It took me a second.

[Adam Carolla]

So they're gonna look, here's how they would. You don't need. You can just start being accurate, and then people eventually will wander back into your tent. You know, you've been around a lot, like, okay, I've said it a million times. Audi was an amazing innovator and car brand. Audi was Auto Union. Auto Union made incredible German race cars, like, in the 30s and stuff. Audi was incredible brand in the 30s and the 40s. And then Audi fell apart. And then Audi came back, and then Audi made junk through the, like, 70s and 80s, and they still had interesting rally cars and stuff, but they're really just kind of junky cars. And then they kind of rebirthed themselves again in the 90s, and now they make really good cars, you know? And so. So if you said to me, like, what do you think of an Audi? I'd go, well, they had some shitty. Some rough years, but they have good now. They're good. But if you said to my son, what do you think about an Audi? You go, audis are great. Then I'll take an Audi. What do you got to say about an Audi?

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, but I don't know if that's because they initialized, right? It's because they made better cars, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, they made a better product. No, that's what I'm saying. Like msnbc. Stop lying. Start being accurate. Stop just. With Trump Derangement Syndrome and start being accurate. Have different voices on and people wander back into the tent. That's how it can work that way.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's how I remember. I used to work for HSBC Bank. You remember that bank? It's Hong Kong Shanghai Bank Corp. And they're like, you can never tell anyone that. That's what it stands for.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Barry Rothbart]

Because it's like a Chinese bank.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, it is.

[Barry Rothbart]

I want them to know. Isn't that interesting?

[Adam Carolla]

The worst and weirdest name for a bank is one that was in Beverly Hills and I don't know if it's even still there. It was called the Discount bank of Israel, which sounds like I've seen that before. The Discount bank of Israel.

[Barry Rothbart]

Strange.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. I want bottom of the barrel banking.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's just a weird.

[Adam Carolla]

It just every whatever Jewish stereotype seemed to be involved in that sentence. I pass it in Beverly Hills and go, the Discount bank of Israel.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

What your ATM cards made out of matzah.

[Adam Carolla]

It could have been like a front for Hamas. It could have been a mosque that was recruiting or something. I didn't wander in there. I didn't know what was going in there. But is the Discount bank of Israel still around? Is the question. And you can check. And do they have free checking F1 info off the. Yeah, and then there's EBU or whatever. The one is where the black guy sits there and helps people one to one is that there's a new one, the friendly guy. You know, I always think about it with these people. Like you think about. It's still around, by the way, the Discount bank of Israel. Yeah, I know. Oh, wow. You think about the chick sponsor.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

They're not going out of business.

[Adam Carolla]

You think about the chick from Toyota. The Toyota chick.

[Barry Rothbart]

Who's the Toyota chick?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. See, this is important.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I know who the helpful Honda lady is.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, this is important.

[Barry Rothbart]

I know the Verizon.

[Adam Carolla]

The helpful Honda lady is a helpful Honda man. And that's a rotation. And then there's Geico and they got their people and there was the most interesting man in the world and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, that's right. There's mayhem. You know the Totally. She's the attractive dark haired woman, but not overly attractive. And it's a Toyota celathon. And she's always walking around pointing and shit.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's my type.

[Adam Carolla]

That. That bitch going on year 17. Wow. I swear to God, she's a billionaire. She's quietly like outlived them all. You know what I mean? And so what you can't do. Laura Kopok is her name.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

She started at the same time as Jared from Subway.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm saying you can't go.

[Barry Rothbart]

He's a great one.

[Adam Carolla]

Can't go Gilbert Godfrey or Jared from Subway. You know what I mean? You will lose your cash cow money gig. That. That is a sweet ass money gig for Laurel. Oh, is it Laurel? Okay. Laurel Copeland. She has. I swear to God, that's her Network.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You would say you have to get at her on. Right.

[Adam Carolla]

You think she's been at it for six years. She's been on 16 years.

[Barry Rothbart]

I barely know her. I can visual. I could see her in my head. But that's how they like it, you.

[Adam Carolla]

Know what I mean? Now you go, oh, she was a growling. I never see her, I never hear her on any podcast or anything. It's like, no, you don't. No, you don't. Because she's going to say something about, look, I don't agree with Hamas, but that is not the same as what Israel is doing to those. And then she's gone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. So she, she not. She can't go anywhere or say anything.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

From the river to the.

[Adam Carolla]

You're fired. Fired. She can't say.

[Barry Rothbart]

Kind of easy.

[Adam Carolla]

She can't go up on. I don't even think she could go do like a stand up set because someone would fucking film her making some jokes. Well, you'd want to because you started off by going to the ground links thinking you're gonna be Will Ferrell and now you're the Toyota Cellathon woman.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, no, check your screen. Actually, she's opening for Blake Griffin.

[Adam Carolla]

She's opening for Blake and Piven.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, she can headline.

[Adam Carolla]

How many years has she been doing that gig? Toyota Bomb? But I do, I think about all the time. I'm like, it's gotta be weird to be a creative or an artist or comedian or a comedic voice or something and be in some position where you had to kind of stifle yourself a lot. And to the point where, by the way, if I said, oh, you're a groundling. I'm so groundling. You should come on the podcast. She would go, I would love to. I'm a big fan and there's no fucking way I'm coming on your podcast, by the way. I go, you don't have to say anything. Yeah, she wouldn't say anything. I'd start saying shit. And that'd be enough to get her.

[Barry Rothbart]

Or I think once you have kids, maybe you're like, this paycheck is great. You know, she's.

[Adam Carolla]

She played or you justify. Oh no, you justify.

[Barry Rothbart]

This is.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm acting.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah. People recognize me.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Everyone knows me as Jan, which is her name, by the way. Do we need to give her a name?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

Do we need to give her a name?

[Barry Rothbart]

You know, I feel that way about Ryan Seacrest and Carson Daly that they are just unmemorable enough to just have the longest career ever.

[Adam Carolla]

I am so, so glad you brought up Carson, Dale.

[Barry Rothbart]

Don't you feel like they're just, like.

[Adam Carolla]

So glad you kind of forget they're.

[Barry Rothbart]

In the room and that's like, the most important quality about them.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I am so, like, optical camouflage or they're just kind of there as a floating head.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So you need that. Yeah. Go, Andrew. Get my white little notepad that's like, sitting on that minute. Smallish white note. Oh, wow.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That Carson Daly.

[Barry Rothbart]

Daly manifest stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm going to blow your mind, bro. Can't wait. Oh, man. You're going to be in the closet tonight. Rub one out. I'm already dying. Head spinning, spinning. Tell my wife. Take your.

[Barry Rothbart]

Take your jackets out of there.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Getting your car today. You want to hear about Hillary Clinton, what she has to say? Well, she recently said that she'd nominate Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize if he ends the Ukraine war without giving territory to Russia. Russia.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Well, there's a caveat.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, first off, there is going to be territory given away because it's this weird thing where it's like we're having. We're having. We're gonna meet. You know what I mean? And it's like we're gonna have a negotiation, and the negotiation is not gonna be Putin, you get nothing, and Ukraine, you're fine, and we'll call it a day. Cuz that's not gonna work. They're both gonna be miserable at the end of the day. And that's how, you know, it worked. You know, it's fair. Both sides are miserable and land is gonna be given away.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, the dome bus is hit there.

[Adam Carolla]

So she's gonna walk in this. She's basically saying it's like, it's. It's like me saying, I'm gonna talk to my sports agent. You know, hey, if you think you can sign that Cy Young winner for free, you deserve Sports Agent of the Year.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Well, he's not fucking doing it. That's why. But still could be magnanimous.

[Barry Rothbart]

I'm just happy Hillary has a social media manager.

[Caller or Guest]

If President Trump were the architect of that, I'd nominate him for a Nobel Peace Prize.

[Barry Rothbart]

We are on the precipice of a.

[Caller or Guest]

Meeting between President Trump and President Putin in Alaska.

[Adam Carolla]

Drawing on, in your experience as Secretary of State, if you were en route.

[Caller or Guest]

To Alaska, what would you be looking to get? What does an acceptable deal look like? He is not meeting with a friend. He is meeting with an adversary, and an adversary who wants to see the destruction of the United States and the Western Alliance. But if he could bring about the end to this terrible war where Putin is the aggressor invading a neighbor country, trying to change the borders, if he could end it without putting Ukraine in a position where it had to concede its territory to the aggressor, had to, in a way validate Putin's vision of Greater Russia, but instead could really stand up to Putin to make it clear there must a be ceasefire, there will be no exchange of territory, and that over a period of time, Putin should be actually withdrawing from the territory he seized in order to demonstrate good faith efforts.

[Adam Carolla]

Let us know. That's good enough. First off, I thought he was Putin's best buddy. I don't know these. According to Hillary Clinton, he's not meeting with an adversary. He's meeting with a cat's paw. He's meeting with his friend. The guy does all the bidding. Remember, he's in Putin's back pocket. Remember that?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Hillary, she changed it up, though.

[Adam Carolla]

She said that he's adversary, but what a whole dossier made saying that he was worked for Putin. So, okay, so she's changing. All right, I wrote down. This is a weird thing. It's a weird thing. So I had my little notepad and I was like making all these little notes as I was driving in. Now, my notes aren't that detailed because I do it while I'm driving a car.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's not safe.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you've obviously seen what I can do behind the wheel of a car. I can fucking sit in an electric Audi in traffic and fucking. Okay, yeah, all right. So. And then I come in here and I go to Andrew and I go, okay, write this down, write that down. I want to talk about this. I want to talk about that. And I kept saying, there's something I'm forgetting, though. There's something I'm forgetting and something I wanted to talk about, but I couldn't remember. And I kept looking at my notes, and my notes say things like, fuel. One of the things is, I'm going to take the fuel out of my race car. And the other talked about the Boston mayor and her hand sign language person. And then little weird notes. But I kept thinking I was forgetting something. And I was. Which was? I wrote down, if you can read what it says right there, I think Carson Pod. Right. But it's supposed to say Carson Poole.

[Barry Rothbart]

Carson Poole.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, Carson Poole.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah. What's that?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I was talking to Dr. Drew this morning on my ride In. And he's in New York and he was like in the gym of his condo or something, and then he goes, I'm in the middle of just talking to him, like I always talk to him. And he goes, oh, hey, hold on. Someone wants to say hi to you. And then he hands the phone to a guy and it's Carson day.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, shit, It's Carson day. This morning.

[Adam Carolla]

This morning. Oh, my God, this morning. Not only that, I was sitting around going, what the fuck? Did I want to. What did I want to. I want to say something. I want to say something. So then I talked to Carson, who's an old friend, and I go, are you still in the Palisades? And he goes, no, no, we sold that place. I'm out in New York and blah, blah, blah, blah. He goes, but I hear you all the time talking about my double hold pool. And I love it. I love it. And I said, you know, that pool of yours that you built in the Palisades is just a perfect metaphor for California. And he goes, oh, I love that story. I love when you tell the story. And so I said, yeah, okay. And then I wrote Carson Poole because I wanted to remind myself. And then completely spazzed down because Carson Poole, I thought was like a baseball player or something. Something like Carson Poole. Who'd he play for?

[Barry Rothbart]

Great name.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I didn't write. I think I'll remember, but I need to write Carson Daly.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

It sounds like a brand of above ground.

[Adam Carolla]

Carson Poole.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Get yourself a Carson Poole now.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. So I was. When Carson. I was a contractor. So when, you know, when Carson was anyone's building something, they always would come to me and cry on my shoulder about how much everything cost or what it was. He's building this house in the Palisades and years ago, and then it announces to me like, oh, the fucking. The codes and the red tape and the planning commission and coastal commission. He's like, oh, it's fucking. So anybody who has to do it hates the government immediately because they realize how greedy they are and how. And how all encumbering they are, like, they just get up in your grill and they fuck your shit up. And it takes years and it costs thousands in permits and everyone who's getting rent control fucking loves the government. But the people have to build shit. Hate the government of California. Not of Texas, but of California. They fucking hate them. Anyone who owns anything, builds anything, runs a business. They all hate California. They hate the government. Government because all they do is get in the way and ask for money. And they're arrogant and their attitude is fucking horrible. And they're essentially stifling because people give up. Like, they go, fuck it.

[Barry Rothbart]

Give me my pool.

[Adam Carolla]

Joel McHale never built a pool because it was like, fuck it. I can't do anymore. I can't deal with this anymore. He literally just uses neighbor's pool. So Carson was explaining to me that he had to build a pool in his backyard in the Palisades. And because he was in the Palisades and the Coastal Commission, he had to build a double hold pool. It had to have two pools in one.

[Barry Rothbart]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

He had to have a pool and a pool is you dig a hole with a bobcat, then you put a bunch of rebar in the shape of the pool, spaced out from the dirt, like 6 inches or 4 inches. And then you come in there and you spray it with gunite, which is lightweight concrete, and then they trowel it all down. And that's your pool. It's a cement shell 6 inches thick that sits in a. You know, and then it gets plastered, and then it gets painted or whatever. Gets. Whatever. And that's what a pool is.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, I got it.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, in. And then you put water in, bro.

[Barry Rothbart]

No, no, I'm with you, man.

[Adam Carolla]

Marks and pools. You got it.

[Commercial Announcer]

I'm with you.

[Adam Carolla]

You. So then. But because of the Coastal Commission, you have to do a pool as just described, and then you have to build an inner pool inside of that pool in case any water gets out of your pool. It doesn't get into the groundwater.

[Barry Rothbart]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. What? Now, guess what.

[Barry Rothbart]

What does that mean? Isn't that just a thicker pool?

[Adam Carolla]

No. Oh, because, okay, after the Exxon Valdez busted open and spilled all the oil in the Puget Sound, or Alaskan, whatever it was, the sound. Then someone said, we need to have double hulled tankers. Hold.

[Barry Rothbart]

I thought you said hold. Yeah, yeah. Hold.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold.

[Barry Rothbart]

I got you.

[Adam Carolla]

Double hulled tankers so they can't run aground and leak. All right, so then the Coastal Commission said, we must have double hulled pools. Now, it's not one thick pool. I don't think it is. I mean, Andrew, you can look it up, but no one has ever built this in Texas or Florida. You built two pools, but the one pool, I would assume they have the one pool and then the second pool. Now, don't look up the Valdez. Look up the double hold pools. I would look up. I would assume that, no, they're not right on top of each other. There's some sort of Runoff where that you could collect the water in case it leached through the first hole.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You know Leonardo DiCaprio's complain about this, too? He called it poolception.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, what was your first joke?

[Barry Rothbart]

I was.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I'm sorry, man.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just batting like 300 over here. See, he got.

[Barry Rothbart]

Took me a second.

[Adam Carolla]

Sorry.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

These are slow burns, ace.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. Like after I'm dead. So, Carson, who has to pay? Cause in my mom's hippie world. What's wrong? So what? How could it hurt? It's like, well, how could it hurt? He's got to pay for two fucking pools is how it could hurt him. For something that's unnecessary. That's ubiquitous. By the way, there's a YMCA up the street that has just a single hold pole. Was this a problem?

[Barry Rothbart]

Were pools leaking?

[Adam Carolla]

No, it's never a problem. It's a. They just. They're saying something could happen. Okay. And before you know it, chlorine could get to the ground table. Yeah, but chlorine is already in my drinking water. But. Okay, here's the whole. But this is. All right. This is the Palisades.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's wild. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

This is what they're focused on right now. They want you to have a double hold pool, but their single hold reservoir doesn't have any water in it. And then the fire hits, and there's no water to put it out, and the fucking place burns to the ground and millions of metric tons of carbon are put into the air. And then it fucking rains two weeks later. And all of the toxic burnt trash and all of the furniture and all the paint and all the automobiles, the Teslas and the batteries and everything that was on the fucking hill washes right down the street and right into the Pacific Ocean. So, Carson Daly swimming pool. How did that factor in, really into this equation? So what you guys did is you focus full time on his swimming pool, but you didn't focus on deforestation or having your reservoirs up and repaired or having a fire department that was in place in common. You didn't focus on any of that. Spend all your time on Carson in his pool. And now Carson's pool made it through the fire, but none of his neighbors did. And all of the fucking. Every piece of furniture, carpet, every piece of nylon, every rubber hose on every car and every fucking toxic thing in their house has been melted, liquefied, and ran to the seat and is now killing all the turtles down there. So did you get your wish? Coastal Commission? I don't think so. If your goal wasn't having toxins in the sea. I would say focus on the mayor and the governor managing the forest and keeping the reservoirs filled. Vs Carson Daly in his swimming pool.

[Barry Rothbart]

But he still has a pool pool.

[Adam Carolla]

He sold the house.

[Barry Rothbart]

That's the worst part.

[Adam Carolla]

I know. Carson loves that.

[Barry Rothbart]

Were you ever in that pool?

[Adam Carolla]

No, but I'm going tonight, bro. You're going tonight?

[Barry Rothbart]

We're going right now.

[Adam Carolla]

No, we have to wait till the sun goes down. Yeah, I don't know who. He sold the house.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah, that's true.

[Adam Carolla]

So what is a double hole pool, by the way? Andrew, you got something, something on this.

[Producer or Announcer]

We're still looking.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, well, I mean, they've definitely. It's not ubiquitous. Like they don't have it in any other city, I would imagine. But yeah, we have the ship design. I know what the ship is, though. Well, anyway, Carson had to build two pools.

[Barry Rothbart]

I love that.

[Adam Carolla]

I know. Yeah, I know. And it's like, here's the thing. Not only did your pool cost twice as much because you had to build two, the one you got is a little bit smaller.

[Barry Rothbart]

I still don't understand the idea of two pools. I think I'm visualizing it. Right.

[Adam Carolla]

I still don't picture the double hulled tankership.

[Barry Rothbart]

There's something between each hull.

[Adam Carolla]

A pool. There's a pool and then there's a pool with a space.

[Barry Rothbart]

Oh, here we go. That looks like a thicker bottle. This is a ship design. This is a ship design. The black lines are not watertight lines. The green lines are what is known as watertight. So the dot I see.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

The double bottom has dual green lines.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, okay, you have your car, right? Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

You got the inside of your car and the outside of your car. Right. But if something dents the outside of your car, it doesn't dent the inside of your car. Car per se. Right.

[Barry Rothbart]

Because there's a buffer.

[Adam Carolla]

There's space there.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. So then you would be safer sitting inside. But if the outside of your car was the inside of your car, then if you got hit, it would go right into you.

[Barry Rothbart]

But so then in between each layer. Yeah, it's like a cake, but instead.

[Adam Carolla]

Of icing, it's just two pools with a space. There's. It's two pools and they're space.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Sort of an onion situation.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, I've never designed one and I didn't go to cars half.

[Barry Rothbart]

You've never built a pool?

[Adam Carolla]

You would. I have built a pool. You. Yeah, of course you built a fucking pool.

[Barry Rothbart]

I don't know well, you may be the first person I met who's built a pool.

[Adam Carolla]

You're not hanging around the right people.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, that's true.

[Adam Carolla]

I've never done a double hold pool is what we're speaking of. I. I explained to you how a pool was built, right?

[Barry Rothbart]

I think so.

[Adam Carolla]

Rebar. And I think I, you know, I know how to build.

[Barry Rothbart]

When does the water go in?

[Adam Carolla]

The fun starts after the water goes in. The double hold pool must have space for it to leak through the first one and be captured before it gets through the second one.

[Barry Rothbart]

Can I ask a pool question?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Barry Rothbart]

Do you just, like, let the hose run? How do you fill it up?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, you can shut it on and off, but it takes considerably longer. So I would say just let it run. Yes.

[Barry Rothbart]

I'm saying, like, you have an empty pool.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah. You have to put water in there.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. All right, Someone found out. Okay, so let. Listen, Pools. If you built a pool right now and evidently are in no position to build a pool.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Mentally, financially, spiritually.

[Barry Rothbart]

Now I am.

[Adam Carolla]

You're way too confused for. If you built a pool right now, we would hard plummet and there'd be a pipe.

[Barry Rothbart]

That would be the way to do it.

[Adam Carolla]

And you would have a sensor or whatever. When the water got low, that thing would kick off and just fill it up for you. You wouldn't run out there with a hose. You know, like Aaron Spelling. He didn't stand with a hose with his pool, you know. No, he hired someone to do it. Nah, nah, I thought so too. It'll be plumb. Well, no, for his above ground pool.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah. I'm getting imposter syndrome, but I don't know how to build one.

[Barry Rothbart]

Carson pool.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, all right. We don't have the pool.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Carson Pooley.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, Carson Pool. Anyway, it's a way to capture the water that leaks through the first pool. Except for the water never leaks through the first pool.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Water go. Yeah. Our whole contention is where does that water go? It's in the ice.

[Barry Rothbart]

It's just there's like a little layer. It's like icing in a cake. You get the cake metaphor, right?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, I get.

[Adam Carolla]

Would. All right. I've never built this pool we speak of, but I am an engineer. I do understand how everything works. There would have to be a way to capture the water and a way to expel the water. The water would have to go somewhere. I. I don't think that it's just sitting there. Yeah, well, it can't go into the soil. There's a second pool. But it can't just keep building up, like, in perpetuity.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah, because then you have, like, a pool mold or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it would. It's like septic system. Septic system captures all the waste, but it also has this trickle thing, and it also has, like, bacteria that break stuff down. But then you have to come empty it, you know? But it. There's. There's a process. There's a process to it.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Every time I clean out my pool, I just poured it straight out into the street. Oh, yeah, get at me, Coastal coast.

[Adam Carolla]

Everybody who drains their pool drains it into the gutter, and then it pours into the street, and then it goes into the gutter, and then it ends up in front of Carson Daly's house in Santa Monica. That's where. So that's the crazy. By the way, every time it rains, all the transmission fluid and rubber and every. All the roundup that's on the ground and all the fertilizer and all the squirrel and dog all pour down the drain and then end up in front of Carson Daly's house, too. Wow, Carson.

[Barry Rothbart]

Good thing he sold.

[Adam Carolla]

I know he's getting tired of looking at that river, but it is funny. You were just denigrated. Denigrating car. I did not denigrate. Denigrate. No, no, no, no. I was saying his superpower, it's just being forgettable. Yeah, I would love to have your superpowers not caring, bro. Wait a minute. Is that really a superpower?

[Barry Rothbart]

I don't know. At some point it could be, if you're making a ton of money out of it.

[Adam Carolla]

No, Carson's great, and he's a super nice guy, and he's a lovely guy. He's a lovely guy. So hopefully he'll be out here in September doing the Voice or something, and we'll get him on the show. Let's get him on.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Let's get him forgettably on the show.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, we're done with your news. God bless you. Even if you're not.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Thanks for listening.

[Adam Carolla]

Barry, where can we find your podcast? Searching Audible, which is audible for Alan Rothbard.

[Barry Rothbart]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Available on Audible. Or ever you find finer podcasts as well, you can go to AdamKroll.com got live shows coming up all over. Provo, Utah, Torrance, coming up, Charlotte, North Carolina. Everywhere is where you can go for that mayhem.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I got the Mayhem show on YouTube. Check me out.

[Adam Carolla]

So until next time, I'm Corolla for Barry Rothbard and Mayhem Saiyan Mahalo.

[Producer or Announcer]

Why don't you leave us a voicemail? Call 888-634-1744 and say something. Make it good though so we can use it on the app and get your tickets to Adam. See [e-mail].

[Commercial Announcer]

This summer Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cough, Good Burger and Transformers. Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto TV Stream now pay never. This summer Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of Cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cough, Good Burger and Transformers. Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices places. Pluto TV Stream now pay never.