Cocaine Pit Bulls, L.A.’s Parking Grift & Faith vs. Skepticism – Chrissie Mayr & Ross Douthat Join the Show

Summary

Podcast Summary: Adam Carolla Show – "Cocaine Pit Bulls, L.A.’s Parking Grift & Faith vs. Skepticism"

Episode Details:

• Title: Cocaine Pit Bulls, L.A.’s Parking Grift & Faith vs. Skepticism – Chrissie Mayr & Ross Douthat Join the Show
• Release Date: March 23, 2025
• Host: Adam Carolla
• Guests: Chrissie Mayr (Comedian), Ross Douthat (Author), Jason Mayhem Miller (Co-Host), Nithya Raman (Co-Host)

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1. Introduction and Guest Welcome (00:00 – 04:07)

The episode kicks off with Adam Carolla humorously critiquing the ironic overuse of smartphones, highlighting a promotional segment for U.S. Cellular's "US mode." Shortly after, Chrissy Mayr is introduced as a comedian and podcaster, followed by an introduction of Ross Douthat, a writer for The New York Times. They also welcome returning guest Jason Mayhem Miller, who shares a personal anecdote about discovering his pregnancy.

Notable Quote:

Adam Carolla [04:05]: "How could that be? ...or maybe it's just a reverse engineering."

2. Discussion on Public Health Messaging and Irony (04:07 – 09:42)

Adam and Jason delve into skepticism about public health advice, specifically criticizing perceived inconsistencies in medical recommendations. They mock the equivalence drawn between smoking one cigarette and a pack, as well as between consuming Girl Scout cookies and maintaining health. The conversation satirizes how policies aim to manipulate behavior while presenting contradictory information.

Notable Quote:

Jason Mayhem Miller [04:49]: "They really don't want us."

Adam Carolla [06:35]: "We're just gonna lie our asses off."

3. Internet Phenomenon: Down Syndrome Filters (09:42 – 45:48)

A significant portion of the episode humorously and controversially discusses a viral video featuring a woman with Down syndrome using a filter to appear more attractive. The hosts engage in insensitive and derogatory commentary about individuals with intellectual disabilities, reflecting a lack of respectful discourse. They debate the societal implications and motivations behind such viral content, blending offensive humor with critiques of internet culture.

Notable Quotes:

Adam Carolla [15:35]: "It's taking the Internet by storm."

Jason Mayhem Miller [19:45]: "But heterosexual lady. Always been a lady. Down syndrome. Five and a half."

Please note: The discussion contains language and viewpoints that are offensive and disrespectful towards individuals with Down syndrome and other intellectual disabilities.

4. L.A.’s Parking Ticket Crisis (45:48 – 32:28)

Transitioning from light-hearted topics, the podcast addresses a serious issue in Los Angeles: the city's parking enforcement system. Chrissy Mayer presents a report detailing how L.A. spends approximately $160 million annually on parking tickets but only recovers $100 million in revenue, resulting in a $60 million deficit. The hosts critique municipal inefficiency and compare it unfavorably to privatized systems, referencing Chicago's long-term parking meter lease with the UAE.

Notable Quote:

Adam Carolla [32:09]: "They go, we just lost $65 million last year... they're making money off it."

5. Chicago’s Parking Meter Lease with the UAE (32:28 – 44:40)

Ross Douthat provides an in-depth analysis of Chicago's 2008 deal to lease its parking meters to investors from the United Arab Emirates. He explains the long-term financial implications and the city's inability to retract from the 75-year agreement, which has led to significant revenue loss and operational inefficiencies. The discussion underscores the pitfalls of privatizing public assets without foresight.

Notable Quote:

Ross Douthat [39:07]: "Return investment in the deal. The city received a one-time payment of a little more than $1 billion by leasing the parking meters."

6. Reflections on Religion and Atheism Debate (44:40 – 83:43)

The episode shifts towards a philosophical discussion with Ross Douthat, who elaborates on his new book advocating for the rationality of religious belief in the modern world. They debate the existence of God, the purpose of religion, and the impact of atheism. Douthat presents arguments on the fine-tuning of the universe and the complexities of human consciousness as evidence supporting religious belief. Adam shares his pragmatic approach to faith, emphasizing ethical living regardless of belief.

Notable Quotes:

Ross Douthat [21:11]: "It's like consciousness and the material go together. Consciousness maybe shapes the material world."

Ross Douthat [71:15]: "There is some sort of Holocaust connection, evidently. I thought I made that up."

7. Personal Anecdotes and Social Commentary (83:43 – 112:02)

Adam and his co-hosts share various personal stories and opinions, ranging from frustrations with city bureaucracy to humorous takes on family life. They critique contemporary societal issues, promote stand-up shows, and provide shout-outs to sponsors like BetterHelp and O'Reilly Auto Parts. The conversation intertwines humor with sharp critiques of modern culture, politics, and institutional inefficiencies.

Notable Quotes:

Adam Carolla [88:11]: "Cause sandwiches would require sliced bread... it's a shit show."

Adam Carolla [105:37]: "It's beautiful. But not this sandwich."

8. Closing Remarks and Sponsorships (112:02 – End)

The episode concludes with advertisements for sponsors such as BetterHelp and Pluto TV, alongside reminders about Adam Carolla's upcoming stand-up shows. Ross Douthat briefly discusses his book and the impacts of institutional changes post-COVID. The hosts wrap up with final jokes and sign-offs, maintaining the show's characteristic blend of humor and candid commentary.

Notable Quote:

Adam Carolla [110:23]: "I just said, I gotta go get Frankie."

---

Conclusion:

This episode of The Adam Carolla Show traverses a wide array of topics, from light-hearted internet trends to serious municipal financial issues and deep philosophical debates on religion and atheism. While the show maintains its signature comedic tone, it also delves into critical societal analyses, guest insights, and personal anecdotes. Listeners are exposed to a blend of humor, controversy, and thoughtful discussion, encapsulating the dynamic nature of Adam Carolla's podcast.

Disclaimer: The podcast transcript contains offensive language and insensitive remarks towards individuals with intellectual disabilities. The summary aims to provide an accurate depiction of the episode's content without endorsing such language or viewpoints.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Have you noticed the way we use our phones are ironic? I mean, phones are supposed to be for communication, but we look at them more and more than we look at each other. That's ironic. That's what I'm saying. So U.S. cellular created U.S. mode to help us reconnect. It helps us use phones a little less. Ironically, a phone company wanting people to use their phones less ironic. Let's find US again with US mode from US Cellular. Visit uscellular.com builtforus to get started Dear old work platform. It's not you, it's us.

[Chrissy Mayer]

Actually, it is you. Endless onboarding, constant IT bottlenecks. We've had enough. We need a platform that just gets us. And to be honest, we've met someone new. They're called Monday.comcomm and it was love at first onboarding. Their beautiful dashboards, their customizable workflows got us floating on a digital cloud nine. So no hard feelings, but we're moving on. Monday.com, the first work platform you'll love to use.

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, in this episode, funny comedian Chris Mayer, or Chrissy Mayer, you might call her. I think of what she'll answer to. Also a really interesting, interesting. He's a writer for the New York Times, but I got to meet him when I was doing that debate in Austin a few weeks ago. I was impressed. Ross Douthit is going to join us as well. Mayhem's doing news and we'll do that right after this. Betonline is the world's most trusted betting platform and your number one source for betting on all the madness. Whether you're a seasoned fan or a first time bettor, Bet Online is your ultimate game day companion. With the largest selection of odds on everything from college basketball to $200,000 bracket contests, BetOnline continues to be your number one sports betting source. From every Cinderella story to every hat trick, Betonline has you covered with odds, stats and more for every game, every play, and every win. And remember, if the NBA, NHL, UFC or golf is your thing, Betonline has them all. Betonline is your number one sports betting source. Bet Online. The game starts here. Pluto TV is the place for movie.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Jason Mayhem Miller]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Whether you're in the mood to solve a little crime before bedtime with NCIS.

[Adam Carolla]

Or Tracker, or curl up with a surefire hit like Forrest Gump Run Forest.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Ross Douthat]

From Corolla 1 Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Corolla Show. Adam's guest today, comedian Chrissy Mayer and author Ross Douthit. Plus the news and trending topics with Jason Mayhem Miller. And now a man who's never been in a non hostile work environment, Adam Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get it on, got to get on. No choice, baby. Man that you get it on now. Mayhem's here. Chrissy Mayer's here. Chrissy's very funny stand up comedian. Got a podcast as well. Chrissy Mayer podcast. And then also live dates doing standup. So you can go to her website, chrissy m a y r.com for all the live shows. Good to see you again.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Good to see you.

[Adam Carolla]

So congrats. You got a young child.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes. The last time I was here to do your show with Dr. Drew, I had just found out I was pregnant. I was like. And when people hear like, oh, you just found out? No, I was like seven weeks pregnant. Became one of those women that I make fun of. Like, how do you not know you're pregnant? I had, I had a summer. I was drinking White Claw and I was just like, why is my tolerance shit, you know, and, well, I found out for two. I was drinking for two. But like, turns out, like, you can drink up until seven weeks and. And you want. This is not medical advice. But I was worried for several weeks. I'm like, I've been retarded. But it's after it's between seven and 12 weeks where the alcohol really does the most damage. So I got it right in.

[Adam Carolla]

They do. So the medical profession did not do. They didn't do themselves any favors because they've been lying for a long time about a lot of stuff. And what they do is they sort of say. Cause if you study them, they say things like, if you go, what if I just smoke one cigarette a day? They go, just as bad as smoking a pack of cigarettes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

How could that be?

[Adam Carolla]

I know. I go, what if I just had one Girl Scout cookie? Same as eating three boxes. Is it, I don't know. Or let's do a reverse engineering. Maybe this will work. What if I jog for half a block? Is that same as a marathon? Is this how it works?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, I jog to get the mail.

[Adam Carolla]

So they do a lot of like, yeah, just as bad. And it's basically, you can see it all through the lens of the 58,000Americans die. Of secondhand smoke. Every year, nobody dies of secondhand smoke. They invented something called third hand smoke.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, right.

[Adam Carolla]

When it's on your clothes, it's when it's in the sweater of the heterosexual white older guy who hugs his retarded nephew. It's in his sweater.

[Nithya Raman]

I pet his dog and I got fourth degree.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Right. It's in the curtains. It's in the guy's cardigan. But here's my whole point. If you gave these guys two beers if they weren't pregnant, if you gave them two beers and you said, really? So a glass of white wine when you're three weeks pregnant, they go, hey, we just don't want the bitches drinking. You understand?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

They really don't want us.

[Adam Carolla]

We're just gonna lie. We don't want them smoking. So we'll just say one cigarette's as bad as a pack. Because, by the way, if they're smoking one cigarette, they're smoking 12 cigarettes. They're not smoking one cigarette. So we'll just tell them that. We'll tell them that is an equal opportunity killer. You know what I mean? But heterosexual. We want people to wear condoms. You understand? So we are going to lie to everyone about everything. And then we just rolled right into Covid, man, and they just went, oh, now we got a big canvas to lie on.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, now we got them.

[Adam Carolla]

Now we got them. And we're gonna lie our asses off.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, six feet. Sure, that sounds good. That takes care of the secondhand smoke. No hugs. Hugs are out of the question now.

[Adam Carolla]

No hugs, no third hand smoke. We transmitted no Thanksgiving. Yeah. So what they did is. So what they do is they lie, but they lie not because they're evil. But in Covid. Yes, that was the case in many cases.

[Unnamed Speaker]

But.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, the politicians. The politicians were evil, but they lie to get you to do what they want you to do. But it's no different than your mom going to eat those vegetables because there's kids in Africa that don't have garbazo beans. You know what I mean? And you're like, what the fuck does this have to do with it? How's my gonna transport this salad to Africa?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. As a kid, I was like, I guess I'm gonna put these string beans in an envelope and mail them off.

[Adam Carolla]

Send them to Darfur. Yeah, better put some foil around those things. They could go bad on the train ride.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Like, I guess they don't have cigarettes either.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but people will go, well, look, that's a mom trying to get their child to eat vegetables. So you would go, all right, that's not a bad mom. You know, we've all, you know, it's a little version of the boogeyman.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

If you don't go to bed, your nose or like, don't. Your face is gonna stay like that or.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, it's Santa Claus.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

He's keeping a list. You know what I mean? Like, I know it's July, but he's got that list.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, he's been watching.

[Adam Carolla]

He's watching. Right. So that's what it is. Except for it's Santa Claus for tax paying adults. That's what Covid ran into. Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

Pointed out a lady at Disneyland, that Down syndrome.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm.

[Nithya Raman]

And told me that's what happens when you suck your thumb.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No, stop it. Have you seen these videos of these, like, hot girls? There's, like, videos of, like, hot girls.

[Nithya Raman]

Don't worry. Wood.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wait a minute.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I thought you're getting wood.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, I know. There's a Down syndrome lady. There's hot. Got them cakes. I'm telling you, Adam, Carolla, in the younger days, you might have got after it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, my God. And then they have all these. They have all these comments. There's a video where they put the comments together and it said. It said, like, it doesn't matter who the baker is. Cake is cake. If she's down, I'm down. Like, these comments are hilarious.

[Nithya Raman]

I'm a chromosexual.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Chromosexual. Who are. I have not seen any of these. I want to see them, actually.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Watch it. Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

It's taking the Internet by storm.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, is it a dusting of down or full dipping and down?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's a dusting because her body doesn't look retarded. You know, her body.

[Nithya Raman]

Somebody put her to the gym, told her what exercise to do, and she said, okay, I'll do it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Not only is she in the gym, but she's in, like, a hot girl gym outfit. She's like, like, tight yoga pants, tight top. It's like a crop top. And she's like, she knows what she's working with. It's just scary when you're all so retarded, you know? Because if that's your son, if that's your daughter or friend, you're like, don't put a sweatshirt on. You're retarded. Like, you're not. You know what?

[Nithya Raman]

Oh, let it fly.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, let me say this. All right, hold on, hold on.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's one of them.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on. A.

[Nithya Raman]

Taken by storm.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on a second. Hold on. Pause. You may pause. Thank you. All right. I knew a guy once, and maybe this is kind of what we're talking about. There was a retarded guy who worked at ABC and he was in the Special Olympics and he would, you know, of course every Special Olympics that rolled around, he got a medal. Cause they don't. That's the way they roll over the top.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You just show up.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. They're not gonna tell the fourth kid who came in fourth place, he didn't podium and he can go home with an empty bag. You know, everyone gets that. Everyone gets the thing. Yeah, he would put all the medals on and show up at work. But that's what a seven year old would do. Right. Now this guy's 37, but he would. That's what. Right. So if, if a retarded woman found out she had a smoking hot body, she'd probably want to wear a bathing suit.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

To work.

[Adam Carolla]

To work. Right. Like, because. Because it's like wearing the metals around your chest. Like, hey, everyone's. I'm getting it. All this attention. Right?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay.

[Nithya Raman]

Mere metaphors, just solid.

[Adam Carolla]

Let's see if we can find.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

There's a particular. She's in like a crop top and long yoga pants. She's walking around in the gym and.

[Nithya Raman]

She'S got banging participation medals.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Jugs.

[Adam Carolla]

She got you.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

She's looking at the camera like she's literally. She knows she's ringing the dinner bell. You know, I really like this.

[Nithya Raman]

I feel like God bless her heart.

[Adam Carolla]

Does the down syndrome, you know, how much does it mess with the bod? Because they seem to. It seems to affect it. But there are plenty of short, stubby women that have zero down syndrome, you know, so it's not necessarily relegated to just everyone who's built this way because everyone knows somebody who's built that way who doesn't really have any down syndrome.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I remember all the retarded people I've ever seen are like a little bit out of shape. So maybe I thought, well, they're retarded. They don't know they have to work out. They don't know what they look like. But clearly now they do.

[Unnamed Speaker]

They evolve.

[Adam Carolla]

Also, if you're gonna have a bad shape, if you have a nine year old's mentality and the metabolism of a 44 year old, you're gonna get into trouble because you're gonna want to have Crunch Berry cereal for breakfast every day. As a nine, you know, there's a big box of See's candy in the next room. And the only thing stopping me from devouring that is my mind goes, your metabolism is old, bro. And it's not gonna work. But if I was 9, I'd be up in that fucking thing and fighting people that came near me.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

This is not the video I'm thinking of. It'll never go down and to the right. No, no, shoot, shoot. It's. That's not. If you just like.

[Nithya Raman]

She's the one that kinda went on.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Retarded gym girl.

[Adam Carolla]

What is. What are these videos? And then why are we attracted to them? Why have they become a thing?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I think men see a hot retarded girl and they go, I have a chance.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You know, it's like a wounded deer. You know, it's like when that really hot girl's, like, out during the weekend and she's drunk and she's stumbling, it's like, I could catch her when she falls.

[Adam Carolla]

Don't you think that. So we're like hyenas and there's a pack of gazelles.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And they're running for us and we can't keep up with them. But one of them's lame. One of them's got a bad paw, you know, and they start falling behind. But they're the best looking gazelle and we can get. We can catch up to that. It's also. Don't you think, like, no woman I've ever been with is ever interested in anything I'm interested in.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, no. Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I like vintage car racing. They don't like old dots in five, 10 pieces of that class or whatever. Go anywhere near that shit, you know, they also. I shouldn't say no ever. But in general, the stuff I'm. What do I like? I like construction, I like ufc. I like vintage race cars. You know, shit like that. They're like, I'm not into. I'm not into that. But a retarded chick, she might pose.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

On one of the race cars. She might, you know, I'm saying I.

[Adam Carolla]

Show her how shiny it was and how cool it was and have people give her a lot of positive reward when she looked at the car. Comfortable?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

The back seat of the car is.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I mean, there's no back seat, but I. Metaphorically. I know what you're saying. I get what you're saying. Yeah. It's a transmission hump and a roll bar. But is this the one we're talking about?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No, I should find it.

[Nithya Raman]

We're on the hunt.

[Adam Carolla]

So it's. So what are these vids? Is there A label for these vids?

[Nithya Raman]

No, this is just a new phenomenon. This literally happened, like, today or yesterday where somebody made a great video of just a hot retarded chick and, you know, the world has never been the same.

[Adam Carolla]

And how do we know they're not doing a sort of Jim Carrey on us? You know what I mean? He can make his face look pretty retarded.

[Nithya Raman]

You know, it looks, you know, short or extra. I don't know which.

[Adam Carolla]

All right.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Syndrome gym. We look in YouTube.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, now. Yeah. What? You got to give us some key words so we can find this.

[Nithya Raman]

I don't know if I'm retarded, but that's what I would guess.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, I'm trying to think. Would there be mayhem if you're dating retarded chick?

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah. I mean, yeah.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Would there be a huge chasm, you know, conversationally?

[Nithya Raman]

There'd be some arguments about peanut butter and jelly.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Right. Because what's the difference between a retarded girl and a 22 year old?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, like just your basic hottie 22 year old who was really into the Kardashians or something. Would it be that different? You'd have to sit there and endure a bunch of dumb conversations about the Kardashians and the Real Housewives or whatever it is they were into. A lot of Blake Lively team talk. You know, you gotta pick a side and you're just sitting there going, yeah.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes. Love is Blind. Sounds like a great show.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

You guys are describing my girlfriend.

[Adam Carolla]

Maybe some of this is based on that special needs dating show, Love on the Spectrum. Love on the Spectrum? Yeah. It's a Neil diamond song, too. Love on the Spectrum Ain't no surprise Pull up a handicap plate and I'll.

[Nithya Raman]

Tell you some lies.

[Adam Carolla]

Love on the rocks Remember that's Neil diamond crayons. Yeah. Keep eating crayons and eating sugary cereal.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Don't forget the handicap placard when we go out on a date.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Oh, man. We're all surely going to hell.

[Nithya Raman]

Going to hell.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, but what is this vid mayhem? Come on, go look in your search history. Or William.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, I don't want to bust that out.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I know you don't want people to know what you're looking at, but somebody. But for the sake of the show, for Christ's sake.

[Nithya Raman]

All right, so I sent it to someone. I got it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You did? Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, man. All right, so this is an attractive down syndrome woman working out.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

There's a version of it where it's set to music and they scroll the comments, and it's just the most hilarious thing I've ever seen.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm. And so. And people are in support of this.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

People are in support. I mean, men are like, okay, look, they've come along. They've really come a long way. And I think maybe women and mothers, like, I as a mother look at that and go, oh, like, who's watching her? Like, she.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, can we. Let's. Let's get an informal survey. Can we do this informal survey. Men, average man. And now I guess we can go around and do it, but let's really just think about. Let's think about guys under 30. Guys under 30. Because in a weird way, I'm set in my ways. You know what I'm saying? But are you ready? Mayhem. Yeah, A trans woman, you know, like one of those Brazilian ones.

[Nithya Raman]

We're talking a hot one.

[Adam Carolla]

Wait, when I say Brazilian, I mean hot. Thai trans. All right, all right. Thai trans woman who's a good, solid 9.2. Like, you know, parts gone. Surgery successful. Successful surgery. But was a dude for the first 26 years of life. Okay, now do you have sex with the transformer dude? Now, an attractive lady who's a nine, or do we do. Heterosexual lady. Always been a lady. Down syndrome. Five and a half.

[Nithya Raman]

I didn't know where you were going.

[Adam Carolla]

Five and a half. Where do we go? Where do we go here?

[Nithya Raman]

But I say just. I just have the most ungodly threesome of all time.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you bring both. Yeah, into the boudoir.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

One choice means you are gay, and the other choice is like, all right, you just wanted to take the easy road.

[Adam Carolla]

But some of those trans chips are hot.

[Nithya Raman]

You're either gay or the word. I don't know. I don't know what mental age of consent is there. I think this whole thing is a little bit.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, here's how we work. The age of consent. Yeah, we go. In fact, the woman with down syndrome is 31 years old, but has the capacity mentally of a 9 year old. So the law means, like, you just had sex with a 9 year old. See what I'm saying? No.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. Like, yeah. What age do retarded people become actual adults?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, can I say this? They have the longevity experts have your chronological age, and then they'll go, this is your age in longevity. Like, do you smoke? Do you drink? Do you exercise? So they go, this guy's a seven year old guy, but his number's only 61. And then there's 61 year old guys are 75. You know, hard working, hard drinking, construction guys, you know, whatever. So we have to figure out your.

[Nithya Raman]

Age, but she's lacking a prefrontal cortex.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Your retarded age and your regular age.

[Adam Carolla]

What your driver's license says, not that you've been issued a driver's license. Right, right.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Like dog ears.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Did you send that to somebody? Well, get on it, Dawson. What do you. What do you do?

[Ross Douthat]

Well, you made that really clear and easy with the last statement. With the mental capacity of a nine year old, because let me tell you a little story.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, hold on. Do we go with the Thai woman who's a nine, or do we go with.

[Ross Douthat]

I got to explain myself.

[Adam Carolla]

Five and a half.

[Ross Douthat]

I got a caveat.

[Adam Carolla]

This. Okay, all right.

[Ross Douthat]

I was once in Buenos Aires with our good friend Alan Parsons. Standing outside of a restaurant with drum drummer Danny. Danny Thomas. And coming up towards us is two very short Hispanic men escorting a six foot four brick of a woman. The most beautiful thing we had ever seen, coming down the street towards us.

[Adam Carolla]

Go ahead.

[Ross Douthat]

Got about 15ft away and I'm like, danny, it's a dude. Danny, it's a dude. Danny, it's a dude. And so because I was so impressed and be. And purely on strong ethical and moral grounds, I'd have to go the tranny.

[Adam Carolla]

You go the tranny.

[Ross Douthat]

I can't go a nine year old, mentally.

[Adam Carolla]

I found I've dated actresses that were mentally 13 when they were 31. I mean, you know what I mean? They never fucking heard of the Doobie Brothers, you know? You know what I'm saying? I mean, that's all over the place.

[Ross Douthat]

Yeah, but you should have seen this. You should have seen this one.

[Adam Carolla]

It made it easy. You're right. All right. Surprising answer. But. But I respect it. All right. We can airdrop the video to Aces Search or whatever. Search.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

All right.

[Ross Douthat]

We're talking post op, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

Push that dick out the way and get to work, Dawson.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Okay. I hope that went through.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. If that goes through, then we'll look at that.

[Nithya Raman]

The Cirque Man. God bless your heart.

[Adam Carolla]

I can't believe we got that.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes. Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

It's got a little.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Okay.

[Nithya Raman]

She got those lips.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean?

[Nithya Raman]

She's something. She's something.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Let's watch.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Angelina slowly 46.

[Nithya Raman]

Or.

[Adam Carolla]

Can I say this? Scarlett. Wait a minute. Slow Hansen.

[Ross Douthat]

Hannah Hathaway.

[Nithya Raman]

Hannah is undefeated.

[Adam Carolla]

I want to say this is why America is America. Other cultures and countries don't get it. They don't understand it. They Just don't. They don't have this. One weird thing that we have this.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Shit in the beginning of this video is her walking around.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm. Okay. We can take a look at that.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

It's such a strange mix of like. It's not exactly mean spirited. You know, everybody's saying positive. It's just a funny situation that, you know, God had blessed her with this extra chromosome and hot, hot body.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

If I was retarded and hot, I would still want the attention. And I think retarded people want the attention even more because aren't they always like. I remember the special ed kids at my school, like, at my high school, they were. The teachers were always pulling them off each other. They're always making out and rubbing really well.

[Adam Carolla]

I. Look, all you have to do is do a kind of a math. Mentally, this is where you are. Which is to say, getting back to the aforementioned guy worked at ABC. If I was 7 and I was playing for the East Valley Trojans and the day before was Jersey Day, where they gave you a jersey with your name on the back of it, then guess who would show up at Colfax elementary for the second grade wearing his fucking jersey on Monday? You know what I mean? Like that. Now, I surely wouldn't do that. By the time I got to high school, they had Friday night, Friday day. Because Friday Night Lights is the game. The varsity football team would wear their jerseys to school that day. I deem that gay, but not gay in a homosexual Dawson wants a fucking tranny kind of way. But, you know, thanks for being clear. Yeah, I did it in a. That's lame. Like, everyone knows I play football. I'm the best player on this team, and I don't need to wear my stupid jersey tucked in my sweatpants all day to prove. So I decided by the time I was 17, I thought that shit was lame. But when I was seven, I would have definitely worn the jersey in. And that's what it's like in perpetuity. If you have down syndrome, you're perpetually seven, so there's gonna be a lot of whatever that activity is at 7. And this is also an argument I've made many times about the writers of children's books. I always say everyone thinks you're a hero for writing for six and seven year olds. You're really writing for adults with down syndrome. Like, don't look at yourself as a author for kids. Look at yourself as an author for retarded adults. Because they go, he has the mentality of a 7 year old. Yeah. So he would. That 42 year old would like your shitty children's book. Because it's a mentality of a seven year old, which is essentially retarded. Otherwise they wouldn't say the 44 year old had a mentality. They'd pick another animal or something. He's as smart as a lowland gorilla or something or whatever.

[Nithya Raman]

This is becoming a koala bear.

[Adam Carolla]

No, they go, that 45 year old dude has the mentality of a 6 year old, which means he's retarded. And it means 6 year olds are retarded. Yeah, temporarily.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

But they grow out of the retardation.

[Ross Douthat]

All right, I'll change my mind. If she reads the Cat in the Hat to me about.

[Adam Carolla]

Hop on pop, bro. Greatest stoner laughs in the business. All right, do we have her walk up or her workout or whatever?

[Nithya Raman]

We were certified star. Like people already know her, you know, and that. That one just set her off to the next level of Internet stardom. But I have seen this lady previously working out. Yeah, it comes up somehow.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

A time people thought that this. There was. It was a regular woman using a felt.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

What kind of a woman would make themselves look retarded?

[Adam Carolla]

Question has that be asked.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, what's on my algorithm?

[Adam Carolla]

No. Oh, can you train them to fight?

[Nithya Raman]

Hell yeah. Listen, there's already been that. You can already go down the rabbit hole of. Yeah, down syndrome. There's a Down syndrome fighter out there. He did his thing. I seen him video. He did all right. He didn't really know what he's doing. Somebody didn't take a light on him and beat the hell out of this guy.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

We can already train them to bag groceries.

[Nithya Raman]

It's happened. But we're gonna go deep down the rabbit hole, ace. Now just unlock the doors to Japan. Japan had a whole tournament of down syndrome dudes had. They had guys with no legs and arms fighting each other.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Damn.

[Nithya Raman]

You just don't even want to go down the Special Olympics of Thailand prize fighting of dudes with deformities.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

So these were like just torsos fighting. What were they fighting with?

[Nithya Raman]

Yes, exactly. They're just throwing lumps at one another.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, my God.

[Nithya Raman]

In Muay Thai shorts. Nonetheless.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, man.

[Nithya Raman]

Just two spuds.

[Ross Douthat]

How's that work? Is that just like half a pillowcase at that point?

[Nithya Raman]

I know how it works. It felt like a fever dream. I felt like I was on drugs coming out, like Apocalypse Now. The horror.

[Adam Carolla]

You've done your fair share of ground and pound, but if that guy had down Syndrome. And he was on his back, would you be dropping elbows?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It would be down and pound.

[Nithya Raman]

Up and elbows down in, pound, down and pound.

[Adam Carolla]

No mercy.

[Nithya Raman]

No mercy.

[Adam Carolla]

Like the Cobra Kai, he knew what.

[Nithya Raman]

He was getting into.

[Adam Carolla]

I just feel like once the guy with down syndrome got dropped on his back, he just couldn't drop those.

[Nithya Raman]

Should have never laced them up. Show no mercy.

[Ross Douthat]

I don't. I think Mel Gibson ended up showing mercy in. In Beyond Thunderdome.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

Ah, look, man, look. Yeah. The reality situation is the guy down, you in the position to finish him, maybe get a tap out instead of a ground and pound knockout. Okay, that's my.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. Break his femur. All right, I got stuff. Well, you guys can look for that vid or you can airdrop it or something. I got other things to get into.

[Nithya Raman]

I feel dirty after that.

[Adam Carolla]

So. It was brought to my attention that LA has a parking ticket problem, which is an interesting story, which is they spent 160,000 issuing parking tickets. Sorry, 160 million. It cost LA $160 million with personnel and equipment and everything to write tickets. But they only got back 100 million, so they came up 60 million short, and we have a deficit. But we'll play the news story. It's a little long, but it's kind of interesting if you can find it. And then I'll get into something more interesting that has to do with Chicago. Parking tickets. Tickets. In fact, the city of Los Angeles gives out close to 2 million parking violations every year. But city leaders say it's not enough. In fact, city leaders say the cost of giving out those parking tickets is more than the revenue they bring in. KTLA's John Finolio joins us live from Larchmont Village with more on what appears to be a parking ticket crisis. John?

[Chrissy Mayer]

Yeah, Sharon. Micah. That's right. Anyone who's received one of these brilliant $73 citations for street cleaning knows that the pain of parking in the city of Los Angeles is no joke.

[Nithya Raman]

That.

[Chrissy Mayer]

That said, the city is actually losing more money on parking enforcement than it is from taking in all those citations. They're expensive and annoying, but a painful fact of city life. Nobody likes parking citations, but now there may be a reason to dislike them even more.

[Adam Carolla]

The city of Los Angeles is spending.

[G]

Tens of millions of more money each year on parking enforcement than it's actually pulling in from the parking tickets handed out.

[Chrissy Mayer]

John Regardi is the managing editor of Crosstown la, a nonprofit newsroom focusing on data driven journalism. He's referring to this new article by Nathan Elias, who points out that over the last nine years, spending has outpaced revenue.

[Adam Carolla]

We've actually been looking at data going all the way back to 2016. So we've seen a shift in time.

[G]

And it has worsened over the past few years. And then we got to a situation where in the last fiscal year, there was about a $65 million shortfall between what the city took in and what it spent on parking enforcement.

[Chrissy Mayer]

He says that can be attributed to rising costs for salaries, pension contributions, equipment, and other expenses. The COVID pandemic when parking enforcement was temporarily suspended only made matters worse. Last year, the city collected over $100 million in parking fines, but still not enough to cover the cost of operating the city's Department of Transportation Parking Violations Bureau, which spent 176 million last year alone, according to the city's annual budget report.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, we're fucking done. We're so bad. We're so bad. But listen, everybody, I don't know how many times when you just give people money and tell them, we'll pay you, whether you do your job or not or hang out or whatever. All these bloated city. All these fucking federal employees and city employees, they don't just get. They don't give a fuck. And then I was looking. I mean, first off, imagine that you're making people miserable and you're losing money in the process. But then I saw this article that In Chicago in 08, they sold their parking meters, the rights to their parking meters to the United Arab Emirates. Right? That's Chicago, by the way. That's deep blue Chicago. Well, let me tell you something. You know, Chicago, you're real progressive folk over in Chicago, the uae, they don't treat their lady friends that well. But you sold these guys. These guys. Women need a male guardian's approval for marriage, which is interesting. I wrote a few highlights down. Men can unilaterally divorce their wives. Just announce it, not deal with it. Employers can require male guardianship permission to let women work. They basically loosely based on Islamic law. They're allowed to discipline your wife using Islamic law. And what was the one? There was one. Oh, when. Oh, man, Andrew. The one I wanted the most, you didn't put on there, which is in court. Women's testimony only count as half an opinion, which that's just accurate. I mean, anyone has ever. Has anyone ever heard a woman's accounting of something? I need to stand there like an interpreter, and they start talking about what happened. And I go, yeah, no, we weren't parked out front we were parked. Well, then this guy comes out, he's swinging a butcher and he was. He was just. He was moving his hands like, I have to work as an interpreter. So imagine her up on the stand at this point and no interpreter, you know. But yes, they. All right. The point is this place ain't great to ladies. Chicago never stops having marches for ladies and loves the ladies. But they sold all the rights to their meters, to their parking meters, to the place that doesn't love the ladies, which is interesting. Maybe Chicago doesn't love the ladies as much as we thought. I don't know. Let's ask the gays for Palestine. I don't know. But then I was kind of reading the article and Dawson, maybe you have it or the tweet or something there you can take a look at. Because I can't really read from here, but I think they want to buy it back. But I just had this thought. But, Dawson, you give us a heads up and then I'll give you my commentary.

[Ross Douthat]

Can Chicago get out of the parking meter deal? Short answer. No, not easily. The 75 year deal until 2083 is legally binding and getting out of it would be extremely costly. Options for exiting the deal would be buy back the lease, which would cost billions, prove breach of contract. But no, my major violations have been found. They can renegotiate terms, but any minor.

[Adam Carolla]

Why did they sell it at the top? Did they talk about selling it in the first place to the UAE or. Where would that article. Somebody be ready with that article? Especially if we talk about off the air.

[Ross Douthat]

Yeah, this is actually just a picture of the article, so we'll find the whole thing.

[Adam Carolla]

All right.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

When I was in LA last.

[Adam Carolla]

Why are we getting into this before we get on the air? We gotta find that stuff. All right, we can find that out.

[Nithya Raman]

You better be careful. You're gonna get Khashoggi.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I got a traffic ticket for. They ended up taking a picture of me. They could be like, we know you ran a red light. They send you the picture that they take of you in your car. And I had my friend, my opener, Keanu next to me. And it's. What was funny is that they actually put a circle around the passenger's face. I was like, why did they blank it out? They blanked it out.

[Nithya Raman]

And I'm like, somebody's cheating on their wife. And they got their other lady in the car.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

So incredible to me because I was like, wow. They actually want to protect the privacy. Like, here's this ticket that we're I think I had to pay, like 5 or 700. It was insane.

[Nithya Raman]

And I was fast thinking that I got busted.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I got busted cheating that way.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh. What?

[Adam Carolla]

I did stop. Well, no, that's crazy. The picture, it looked like nobody was there. And my wife was like, oh, you're just driving alone. And I was like, no, I was gonna blowjob. And I realized I shouldn't have said anything because in the picture, it looked like nobody was there, and I shouldn't have shut the up. You know what I mean? I should have just went, yeah, I'm driving alone. You know what I mean?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

But you thought, like. Let me tell you, I was kind of blurted.

[Adam Carolla]

I just blurted out.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it was dumb. I know. When you look back on it, you.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Should have waited to see.

[Adam Carolla]

You should just not said anything.

[Nithya Raman]

I feel your pain, dude.

[Adam Carolla]

Cause all it was was a picture of me driving alone. You couldn't see her.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wow. Oh, my God.

[Adam Carolla]

You know?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. You could have been. You could have been safe.

[Adam Carolla]

I had to open my mouth. She had to open her mouth.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wow. Were you actually driving and the person was able to, like, get it done? Yeah. That's commendable.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but I shouldn't have said anything. Cause in the picture, just, like, I was alone. You know what I mean?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Why is there a random purse?

[Adam Carolla]

Like, I could have went like, I was just going to the gym alone.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Look how happy Adam is driving to the gym. Wow. He's really happy in his car.

[Adam Carolla]

Why is your T shirt in your mouth?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Why can't I see your belly?

[Adam Carolla]

All right, wherever that article is, somebody got it or we don't have it.

[Ross Douthat]

I got the article from the top.

[Adam Carolla]

Get rid of the screen and then put whatever other information you need read on the. On the screen. Like Dawson's ready with the article. All right, here we go.

[Ross Douthat]

Every time a Chicagoan shells out money to drive on the skyway, park on a metered streets of Chicago, or downtown in a public garage like the Millennium park garage, keep in mind that those dollars go to outside investors, not the city. Chicago undergoes the 2025 budget season hunting for creative ways to close a nearly $1 billion gap shortfall.

[Adam Carolla]

What? Chicago?

[Ross Douthat]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

What's up with these blue cities?

[Ross Douthat]

Memories of former Mayor Daley privatizing the city's profitable assets haunts city hall, especially the 2008 parking meters deal.

[Adam Carolla]

So the money goes to the UAE, and we can't get it back from them because they're making money off it, and they must have investors.

[Nithya Raman]

This happened in 2008.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Nithya Raman]

So that was at that bottom of the market, everything crashed. So the. The city needed money.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I mean, look, it was creative at the time, but here's the thing. Anymore, Dawson, or you got it.

[Ross Douthat]

Let me scan this and see if there's anything important to point out.

[Adam Carolla]

So here's the thing. If we outsourced, if Los Angeles outsourced all of its parking enforcement meter and what have you, revenue generators to an outside consortium who needed to return on their investment, they would fix this shit immediately because they'd go, we just lost $65 million last year and our investors are getting kind of pissed off. So we're going to fucking trim the fat. We're going to expedite shit, we're going to clean this shit up and we're going to get it working so we can have a return of investment on our investors. But if you just go to the city and you go, no one's ever going to lose their job and who gives a fuck how much taxpayer money we lose? That's where you get this. And that's what I keep saying to everybody. They go, you don't want private business in charge of. I go, the fuck I don't. Yes, I do. By the way, you guys, you know, they do this thing all the time. They go, they want to shut down the Department of Education.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Good.

[Adam Carolla]

What do you guys got? Let's just talk results. You act like it's gonna be cataclysmic if you shut down the whatever department. Math scores in the basement, reading in the basement, dropout levels in the basement, graduate. Show me the part where you guys are achieving anything. It's the weirdest thing ever. It's like they go, you don't want to fire the coach. Yeah. Of the team that's 2 and 15 every year. Yes, I do. What do you mean you're gonna fire? It's. He yields bad results. Why is that shocking to you? Well, what about the players?

[G]

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[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. I bet they'd like to win. How about that? What about the kids? I don't know which kids? The kids that are failing or the 2% that aren't.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Are we waiting till we're zero? Are we waiting till the math and reading levels are at like 10%?

[Adam Carolla]

It's this weird thing where they go, you want to hand over this to the. Yeah. I'll bet those guys from the UAE are making sure that they get a nice return on their investment every single year. All those miles away in Chicago because they're invested in it. Yes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Like the mob.

[Adam Carolla]

Sorry Dawson.

[Ross Douthat]

Mayor Daley inked the infamous 2008 parking meter deal to avoid property tax hikes and look more favorable to taxpayers. But it was short sighted. Return investment in the deal. The city received a one time payment of a little more than $1 billion by leasing the parking meters to the investment bank Morgan Stanley and other private investors for 75 years. The invest in the investment company that owns a large stake in the parking meters. His based overseas in Abu Dhabi Capital, the United Arab Emirates. At the time the Chicago Reader wrote, eventually the private company will make a fortune off the deal. But by then everyone now running the city will be gone.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so they like to get it back, but they can't. It was also weird like. Like what? Can't somebody sell? You know what I mean? Like you have to. Some guy was just staring at a parking meter in downtown Chicago going I bet there's some Arab dudes like to get their on this thing. And they go what? What if I broker a deal? You'd just be like what the fuck are you talking? I get selling a used car, but selling the rights to a parking meter. But we're there. Yeah, it's sort of. You know what it's like. When I was a kid, you would pass billboards for advertisement and that was about all. Or you see a TV commercial now you see cars wrapped with shit. There's just guys writing golden palace on their back before they get into the ring. You know what I mean? We literally will advertise anything anywhere now, right?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. Yeah, it's true. Yeah. YouTube, they're throwing ads for all kinds of stuff on your videos and. Yeah, like the car. You could drive around for cheaper, free cars that have, like, ridiculous ads on them.

[Adam Carolla]

I know there's Abu Dhabi, but is there a. Is there a Arab emirate called Yabba Dabba? Because I would love.

[Nithya Raman]

I would love to live in Yaba for the ribs.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, we got the news. Do we find the down syndrome lady with the rack?

[Nithya Raman]

She was trying to find it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I'm trying to send it. There it goes. And then I have. I think one more.

[Adam Carolla]

Cause I'm fascinated by this.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I have my husband on the case, and I have something that's gonna ruin everybody's day. It's a woman using a filter.

[Adam Carolla]

She is. Yeah, it's a hot chick with a filter.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's a hot chick with a filter.

[Adam Carolla]

She got sit down with that app.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yep. Download it. And that's the video for walking around.

[Adam Carolla]

Sorry. Give us the top. Oh, she's doing the down syndrome filter.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Instagram. God damn it. How do I send something on Instagram?

[Nithya Raman]

Nothing is true on the Internet.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know what to believe anymore.

[Nithya Raman]

I know. How could.

[Adam Carolla]

So who blew the lid off this case? Did your husband find out?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

My husband's on the case? Yeah, he found it because, you know, this is the kind of research I have him doing for me while he watches our. While he watches our baby.

[Adam Carolla]

So this was a Down syndrome filter?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes.

[Nithya Raman]

We're duped again, Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

I've told you guys many, many times. Hey, how old's that kid of yours?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

11 months.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, good. Plenty of time to use the down syndrome filter. Now, listen, I want you to hear me, Chrissy. I want you to really focus. You show me a lovely picture of your son. He looked very healthy and quite capable. But I don't want you showing that picture to any future bosses.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

No, no. I want you to use the down syndrome filter. Okay. What's the boy's name?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Frankie.

[Adam Carolla]

Frankie's perfect. It's a perfect retarded name. Not saying you're retarded. I'm saying the name is retarded.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

What about Frank?

[Adam Carolla]

Frank, not as retarded. Go with Frankie.

[Nithya Raman]

Frankie, baby.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

We did. We had a retarded person in my high school named Frank.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you want your husband. He's a normie, right? He's a regular job guy, as far as I know. House husband or something?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No, he's got a regular job.

[Adam Carolla]

What's his job?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Well, he books and produces comedy shows. He helps me with my podcast, and he also has another regular day job.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, none of those are regular jobs. Helping. Helping book a podcast. It's not a. Okay, let me just say this to everyone listening. You got that beautiful picture of your son. Anyone who's listening, do this. I've told people to do this over the years. They don't listen to me. But now with the filter, this is gonna work. I swear to God, this is gonna work. What if I just said to everyone, everybody, look, would you like a never ending excuse to get out of work for the rest of your life without ever being asked a question? If you wanna go any day you want, any day the fucking week, you want to go surfing when the swell comes in. Or maybe you just want to take a me day.

[Nithya Raman]

Oh, my God.

[Adam Carolla]

Get that picture of your boy.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

Put the down syndrome filter on it. Name him Frankie. And then first day of work, when you're meeting the boss, they go, you married, man? I'm married. I got a beautiful. That's Frankie. He's very. He's special.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He's drooling a lot.

[Adam Carolla]

And you show him and you try to hold back a little, hold that tear back a little. And you go, so he's braver than I would ever dream of being. And the boss goes, oh, I get. Yeah, I get it. I get it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

And then from that day on, I schedule my massage.

[Adam Carolla]

Get the Burke Williams app down, along with the down syndrome app. Okay. Cause you can use them both, you know, and then any Monday on any given week, you just text that guy, Frankie's having kind of a bad day. And he. Do you take as much time as you need to deal with Frankie? You go, yeah, it can be a little overwhelming at times. And you're done. You're never. No questions.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, maybe that eventually ends, but this.

[Adam Carolla]

Is like extended gift that keeps giving. The period is good. The using the period excuse is good. But you can't use that once a week. You gotta plan that out. You know what I mean? He's gonna get your schedule.

[Nithya Raman]

You worked at the company for 10 years, and then you just get your kid to act right.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

But what if there's like, yeah, at the company.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah. Company party, you have the kids just.

[Adam Carolla]

Running around with the we. But with the app, I don't think the kid ever has to show up because at some point the kid's going to be 10, but the app's still going to work. Now you got a retarded 10 year old, right? And then, you know, they go, what? Why don't you bring Frankie to the picnic the company. The noise is made.

[Nithya Raman]

Oh, my God.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, sometimes he's not good around a lot of loud noises.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Earbuds.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I just don't. It could be triggering and then you'll get. Oh, yeah, no, take tomorrow off. Take tomorrow off? Yeah, take care of Frankie and you won't have to get specific. All you do is, Frankie's having a bad day and that's it. That's it. Just take as much time.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, I think I could pull this off, Frankie.

[Adam Carolla]

First off, his name's Frankie.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So you're there. Step one, the app exists. You know, I, like my dad, probably would have used that app if it existed when I was young.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

College scholarships.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, well, that's the second. Okay, so it'd be good if you need a little advancement or a little extra cash. Like, Frankie's in home care is a little more expensive than we thought. And I know it's a little early for a raise, but. But Frankie's in home care is not covered by insurance.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

And then just hire an assistant or somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

No, just get the cash. That's my whole point. You guys aren't thinking right. Bring him to the fucking party. Hiring it. No, that's cash that's in your pocket.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's brilliant. But what if they have to see him one day? Just hope he asks.

[Ross Douthat]

This is your work life. This is not your home life. Yeah, when they force you to go to a sexual harassment seminar, you say, oh, Frankie, I just. I gotta go get Frankie.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

What if they find this podcast, though?

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, I'm just praying that Twitter hits us with the filter.

[Adam Carolla]

You want to get out of anything? Yeah, you're sitting there. It's a little boring. You're getting the sexual harassment or the cultural sensei. Oh, you just look at that phone. Oh, Frankie's having a.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Not having a bad day.

[Adam Carolla]

Go. No, go ahead. We'll just sign your name on the thing. You're good. You're good.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Brilliant.

[Ross Douthat]

You do the company Christmas party in 12 minutes. Walk in. Oh, I gotta go, Frankie.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, no, hold on, wait. You don't want to leave the country? The Christmas party?

[Ross Douthat]

Well, if it's lame, if you just gotta show.

[Adam Carolla]

I feel like all you guys are missing the photo. You want to go to the Christmas party and get drunk for free, but you don't want to bring Frankie because your 10 year old's not a good enough thespian to act for a two hour Christmas party. But he can't. It's too noisy. Frank. That's where you're wrong.

[Nithya Raman]

I'D be like, frankie, we've been training for this your whole life.

[Adam Carolla]

But they've seen the pictures in the app, and when he shows up in real life, they go, it's kind of a good looking. That's not right. No.

[Nithya Raman]

What do you mean? Anytime Frankie leaves the house, he wears a boxing helmet.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Just in case.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Look, you guys can make fun of this if you want. I'm not trying to.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's a brilliant idea.

[Adam Carolla]

You're hot. Look, you're on the road you don't need, but your husband's gonna have to take it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

She might need this.

[Adam Carolla]

A civilian gig at some point.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He does have one currently.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Bring in the picture of Frankie. Put him up on the app.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Gotta get out.

[Adam Carolla]

That's it.

[Nithya Raman]

Your lock screen is a picture of Frankie.

[Adam Carolla]

We're done. All right, we'll take a break, do the news right after this. BetterHelp. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. What are some of your relationship green flags? That's right. We often talk about the red flags, but what about the good stuff? Stuff we're focused on looking for. Look for it in friends, you look for it in partners. It's nice, right? Like when you have somebody and you go, hey, that's not a strike. I like that about that person. As a matter of fact, there's always going to be a couple of reds in there, but if it's overwhelmingly green flags, then go for that. And it's actually nice because if you race, green flag means the start of the race. BetterHelp. It's fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient, serving over 5 million people worldwide. Easy to switch therapists anytime, no extra charge. Take care of yourself. With better help. Right, Dawson?

[Ross Douthat]

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Life isn't about resolutions that fade by February. It's about picking up the pen and becoming the author of your own life. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give better help a try. It's entirely online, convenient and flexible. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. It's time to check Adam's voicemail.

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, Adam, this is Paul from Idaho. Just wondering, when are you going on Gavin Newsom's new podcast? All right, get it on.

[Ross Douthat]

You can leave us a message at 888-634-1744.

[Adam Carolla]

I have not gotten the invite yet, and I don't suspect I will, but. But who knows?

[Nithya Raman]

I think you will.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, well, we crossed.

[Nithya Raman]

All right, news, news, Mayor Bass, her election opponent, says recall effort against her is not a good idea. The Los Angeles businessman who ran against Karen bass in the 2022 election announces opposition Tuesday to the recall effort to unseat her as the city's mayor.

[Adam Carolla]

That's Rick. Correct.

[Nithya Raman]

Real estate magnate former mayoral candidate Rick Russo released a statement about the recall effort effort calling it a costly political distraction in the aftermath of January's deadly wildfires.

[Adam Carolla]

It's always funny. What we have to do in LA is we're so blue that Rick Caruso has to run as a Democrat. But then people like my mom is like, he's not a real Democrat. Like. Cause he's smart and wants to do shit and is efficient. We need someone. Yeah, that he's pretending to be dumb, but he's not really dumb. Like, he's not really feckless and dumb like Karen Bass. He's a smart guy pretending to be dumb. So I'll vote for him. Well, it's not gonna work.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes, he's using the retarded filter.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, he's using the retard filter. So we went, I know we only vote for Democrats, but that guy, he builds stuff and makes payrolls and is smart and effective. Don't give me that Democrat bullshit. I know a Democrat when I see one, and that's her. Where's our plane ticket to Ghana, by the way? We gotta celebrate. He would never go to Ghana and put on ceremonial garb during a windstorm. That's us, baby. So don't let it fool you. He's not real.

[Nithya Raman]

How cool and smooth is it of him to, like, say, no, no, no, let's rebuild la. And then, you know, it kind of really makes him look good.

[Adam Carolla]

But if they do a recall of her, is it him or is it just some other ditzy broad is going to no.

[Ross Douthat]

1 on the ballot? It's, we vote for a recall and then we go to the election. So Rick Russell kind of has a point. Something. I think we have his video. You should listen to somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody. The front runner. Because he said he's not doing it. Again.

[Ross Douthat]

He hasn't said. Well, also, you got to think there's a governor race in California in 2026. Why wouldn't Rick Caruso want to be the fucking governor of California? Not.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, because Kamala Harris is a retarded woman of color. And that's who we want to govern. Us vs a non retarded white guy who would do a good job.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Boring.

[Adam Carolla]

Boring. By the way, we don't look like heroes. Electing a white guy who's good.

[Ross Douthat]

It's funny. When I first saw this headline. I'll see if I can find the exact headline, but the. It was the Los Angeles Times, and they couched the headline as if Rick Caruso was supporting Karen Bass. Let's listen to this.

[H]

If you're going to do a recall now, what's going to happen is the city is going to end up spending 25 to 30 million dollars, which it doesn't have because we've already been told that the city's broke. And then it's going to take eight to 10 months, and it's going to run up to the June primary, and people in June are going to have an opportunity to vote for or against the mayor, and so why do it now? And I think it's a waste of money, waste of resources. And one last thing. We've got so many things the mayor needs to deal with in this city and deal with it. Well, with a lot of focus rebuilding in the Palisades, we still have a major homeless problem. All of these kind of things. The crime, it's going to be a diversion to her and her team, and we don't need her attention diverted right now.

[Nithya Raman]

Now, yeah, in a backhanded way. No, he's supporting Los Angeles. You know, he's not supporting Karen Bass. I. I respect that.

[Ross Douthat]

Another thing I heard Randy Wang on KABC say is that if she's under a recall while in office, she can use city funds to defend herself and thus double dip, where we're, you know, so it's like, okay, Caruso, stop being smart. But. But I agree with him.

[Adam Carolla]

All right? And he's also saying by the time we get all up in this, we'll be at the next.

[Ross Douthat]

We'll be voting anyway.

[Adam Carolla]

Anyway. All.

[Ross Douthat]

But everyone wants a pound of flesh. And I. I understand that. And everyone, you know, yeah, she's. Wants to. To get her out, but.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, what else you got, man?

[Nithya Raman]

All right, look. In horrific news, grandmother mauled to death by pit bulls that were high on cocaine.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, there's a lawsuit. An Ohio grandmother was mauled to death by her neighbor's pit bulls, which were later found to be high on cocaine, according to the lawsuit. This story is just maddening.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

This sounds like a perfect sequel to the movie Cocaine Bear.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, no, the. The dogs got high on coke and got out before, and they caught him and gave him back, and they were in the process of getting rid of this guy's pit bulls, and they once again got into the Coke stash and mauled this lady who was just minding her own business and working in the community garden.

[Adam Carolla]

The community garden? Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

Her disabled husband watched as this happened.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I was sure it wasn't a filter. He's like, he just didn't want to help. He just was like, oh, I can't.

[Adam Carolla]

Help the disabled husband, I guess. Well, first off, what's he even doing? Like, I'm going to watch you till soil while I sit here. Like, it's kind of a weird thing for a disabled person to watch somebody do.

[Nithya Raman]

Well, no, I mean, he would. I'm pretty sure he wasn't watching her garden. I think he came out as the dogs were mauling the lady, kind of helpless to do anything.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He should have created a diversion. He should have come out with some meat.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

And just like, hey, over here, you.

[Ross Douthat]

Know, heroin or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

The guy's son, you know. Oh, man. The woman's son. That woman's son. Bill Rogers says, how do you not look at them as the villain responsible for killing your mom? About the dogs. Yeah. I don't know, man. This one gets me fired up. My mom likes to garden. If somebody's pitman, they would not make it to the prison. You know what I mean?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

And pit bulls are kind of.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold your mom together.

[Nithya Raman]

My mom. Nothing could stop me from getting this.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, we've established that your mom was a sandwich maker.

[Nithya Raman]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Whereas, I don't know, I don't have as strong of feelings about saving my mom from pit bulls. Cause she's not a sandwich. She was not a sandwich maker. You have to ask yourself, was your mom a sandwich maker? If the answer is yes, then there was love. There was great love. Was your mom a sandwich maker?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, she was peanut butter and jellies. But she did make sandwiches.

[Adam Carolla]

The act of sandwich making is the act of love. I've really been thinking about it. Like, you take time, you get things out, you sort of lay it out, and it's all spreading the love around. You know what I mean? Not just spreading the creamy jiff, it's spreading the love.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Your mom didn't make you sandwiches?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, there were sandwich issues at my house.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Because sandwiches would require sliced bread and not 14 grain, unsprouted whole wheat hippie bread. Whole wheat hippie bread doesn't work. And when you. So if you take Wonder Bread, you take white bread, and then you take this sort of processed Peter Pan peanut butter or Skippy Smooth, you just take that shit out. It just glides like a Zamboni right over the top of that shit. Okay? If you take 17 grain unsprouted whole wheat bread and lay that shit first off, good luck even getting it to sit flat. It does what it wants, you know. And then you get the unblanched, unsalted, raw health food peanut butter with no stabilizers in it. It's got its oil slick at the top. You take that shit and you try to rub it on that bread, it rolls over the top of it and eventually turns into a wheel and it just sucks up gravel. Then you get to the end and then you have to treat it like silly Putty on the funny pages. You have to spread it out, try to press it down. You know, it's like putting a toupee on or something. Like stick it down, stick it down. And then there's no Smucker's grape jelly because all that is is corn syrup and purple dye number 14. You got honey. Oh, no. And the honey ain't the squeeze bear. No squeeze bear. That's plastic. It's a jar of honey jar. So now you gotta take the fucking knife out and try to spread the honey over the top of the 14 grain. And then you bite in it and the fucking bread falls apart and everything drips. The honey.

[Nithya Raman]

Dry ass smell.

[Adam Carolla]

No air conditioning in the house. San Fernando Valley, 108 degrees outside. The fucking honey's drip, it's liquefied. It's dripping everywhere. No sandwich. All right, good. That's peanut butter and jelly.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, what about. What about cold cuts? What about ham?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And what about coke? Meat is murder, bro. You think you're gonna have a bunch of fucking Oscar Meyer cold cuts and pre sliced cheese and shit with fucking mayonnaise? No, no, that's. Meat is murder. Yeah, and also cold cuts, I mean, they're kind of ubiquitous now, but cold cuts were a big ticket item back then. That wasn't cheap. You had to go to the fucking deli and get the guy to slice the provolone and slice the smoked ham. No fucking way. There's no way that was happening. They didn't even really. They sold like bologna, which my mom would have never done because that's the man, you know, processed and everything else. So now you've eliminated turkey, you've eliminated ham, you have a kind of play saver peanut butter, but not really. It's not. You guys don't know what it's like to eat a health food peanut butter sandwich. That's the fuck. And by the way, as soon as you bite it, it went Welds to the top of your mouth, spend the whole fuck. You have one bite. 20 minutes later, you're still chewing it like cud.

[Nithya Raman]

You just.

[Adam Carolla]

14 grain bread. You got your fucking finger out. You're trying to peeling it off the top of your mouth. It is not the peanut butter sandwich you're thinking of. It's a shit show. So there is no. There's no sandwich.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

But you grew up in such a healthy house, it sounds like.

[Nithya Raman]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

The problem is then you get an unhealthy appetite for the good stuff when you leave the house. You know what I mean? That's where the problem comes in. But look, let's not make it about me.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I should have brought you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I argue about? I think I wrote about it in one of my books. But it's really the only sandwich that gets better with time. Like, yes, you could make it at seven in the morning and put it in your bag and go to school and at noon. It's better.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Even if it's better than other sandwiches. Decline over that. These, actually. The oil emulsifies with the bread a little bit.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It becomes one.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, you're right.

[Adam Carolla]

But not this sandwich. Not the health food one. The health food one. You can't even transport. It's too heavy.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

Can't move it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And it falls apart. You know, Wonder bread's a little chewy, like, got a little doughyness in it. The 17 grain sprouted shit, it just fucking falls apart.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

The Ezekiel bread, I've had it.

[Adam Carolla]

And the peanut butter doesn't keep it bound together. That. That just rolls. It's a shit show.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It falls off. Yeah.

[Nithya Raman]

In ice cream news, Ben and Jerry's is accusing its parent company, Unilever, for breaching its merger agreement by ousting the ice Cream Co. CEO for the brand's repeated public comments on progressive issues, removing his chief executive without the board's approval.

[Adam Carolla]

So Ben and Jerry's is so woke and so progressive.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's so weird. Yeah, I really. I haven't bought from them in years.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No, it's just they've been woke for quite some time now. And it's like, thank God for Haagens. I was like, if Haagen Dazs pulls this shit, I don't know what I'm gonna do.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, so it's. Yeah, it's really like one company was pro choice, Ben and Jerry's, and then one company built ovens that Jews were put in in World War II. And Chrissy's like, I mean, I'm going with the Haagen dos.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Sounds like a camp in Poland, doesn't it? Grandfather State was rounded up and taken to Haagen Das.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

He put on a cattle train. It was taken straight to Haagen Das camp. Spent the whole war there.

[Nithya Raman]

My grandpa almost died at Haagen Dazs. Yeah, he fell off the guard tower.

[Adam Carolla]

My grade. My great uncle helped liberate haagen Dazs in 44.

[Nithya Raman]

When we rolled over Haagen Dazs, Hitler was running.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I really am German. My dad's side is German and my dad's dad was a German soldier. And I was like, was grandfather a Nazi dad? And he was telling me like, well, the Nazis were the top of the top. Like, they were the alpha, like, best, best. And you know, grandfather was like, not. But he was. I don't know, he might have been a. Who knows? He was probably Nazi adjacent. He was.

[Adam Carolla]

It's kind of a good, it's kind of a good thing. Like, I wasn't smart enough to be a Nazi. Like, where you go, oh, you're, you're doing that. It's kind of like people have a defense where they go sometimes. Like, I didn't know the guy couldn't operate a tractor. It's like, you should have known I was stupid and too stupid to drive a tractor. Like, oh, I like when you, you're claiming it, you know.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

But yeah, where is Haagen Dazs out of?

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah, it's a German word.

[Ross Douthat]

No, it's probably an American company.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, it is now, but it started as something. It had to start as something.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

The Nazis would eat ice cream after they, you know, killed Jews.

[Nithya Raman]

Oh, my God.

[Adam Carolla]

It was invented by Reuben Mattis, the founder of the brand Danish tribute. Danish to Denmark's treatment of Jews during World War II. What? No way. Hold on, let me read this again. The name Haagen Dazs was invented by Reuben Mattis, the founder of the brand to sound. Okay. The founder of the brand, comma, to sound Danish as a tribute to Denmark's treatment of Jews during World War II. Though it's a made up word. Hold on, I'm trying to read here. Though it's a made up word with no real meaning in Danish. Founded in 1960 by Ruben and Mattis in the Bronx, New York, with the goal of creating high quality ice cream. So they're in the Bronx and no one wants to have it named, named after something cool. So they made up the word Haagen Dazs, like yabba dabba, but where the hell the Jews part come in.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I really didn't know Jews were part of this origin story.

[Adam Carolla]

I told you you were supporting.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Now I'm even more for it.

[Nithya Raman]

Well, it's interesting you say that, because Ben and Jerry's initial lawsuit, filed in November 2024, alleged Unilever silenced its attempts to publicly support Palestinian refugees and resolutions to end military aid to Israel, where the company had done business since 1987.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't. I just feel like people who make ice cream should make ice cream, and people who make cars should make cars and students should just be students and go to fucking college. Like, just everyone shut up. All the this. All this. Because, by the way, I don't want Haagen Dazs or Ben and Jerry's announcing who they support. And I don't want you telling me you're bisexual. Just go about your fucking business. Just go about it. Doesn't have anything to do with me. Just show up, be a student, work here, buy that, and shut the fuck up.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's all I got. That's how it used to be.

[Adam Carolla]

That's how it used to be. Ruben and Rose Matis were Polish Jewish entrepreneurs who founded the Haagen Dazs ice cream business in the United States. There is some sort of Holocaust connection, evidently. I thought I made that up.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I thought so, too.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, what else we got?

[Nithya Raman]

We got another story. You know, Gorilla Steve. Stephen Guerillo from the Howard Stern show wrote a book, and his big thing is, Howard Stern made a political U turn to please a list pals.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, wait. Gorilla, was it?

[Nithya Raman]

Gorilla. Remember, he was an intern on the Howard Stern show before you took it over. The. The guy was like. He just really bagged on him a lot. He. He said that once he got the job, it became a nightmare with him being egged on into humiliating. Humiliating himself, but gave him a taste of fame, right?

[Adam Carolla]

So he wrote a book, and he said what in the book?

[Nithya Raman]

He said he never wanted to be on the air, but Howard Stern kind of pulled him on there as an intern. Said the place was a snake pit. You never knew when you were gonna get set up. Yeah, he was always a nervous wreck. And it got worse when they brought me on the show. I have Robin quivers cackling in my ear, and somebody would be throwing balls of paper in my face. Then I would have Howard staring at me, spears and blue eyes darting all over the place, trying to make me look worse than I Already did. Yeah, but he says, he says that, yeah, he definitely got George Pataki Pataky elected governor of New York. And he was a big Rudy Giuliani supporter. He says it's gross to see what he's turned into, I think is quite pathetic, to be honest.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, okay, so listen, I've told people this 100 million times when they sort of go, what's going on with all these Hollywood folks? Folks, if you make an announcement. Oh, you don't have to make an announcement. Your politics, if they don't align with their politics, then they won't come on your show. That's sort of their steadfast rule. That's how they do it. They've done it. They've always done it that way. And I don't know why, I don't get why that needs to happen, but that's the rule. So if you are doing a show and you announce, let's just say, I'll take somebody I don't know well, but let's just say. Let's just say Jimmy Fallon announced that he was voting for Trump. Now, Jimmy Fallon may have very well voted for Trump. I know somebody voted for Trump, cuz he's the fucking president. But let's just say Jimmy Fallon announced. Announced he voted for Trump. Then he would immediately, his guest bookings would immediately dry up.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And then what would happen is he'd have a meeting after, after the show and he'd say, is Clooney coming on Monday? And they'd go, no, Kevin Sorbo is coming on Monday. And they go, what happened? And they go, clooney dropped out. And then they go, oh, but is Matt Damon coming on on Tuesday? And they'd go, no, you remember Chachi, remember that? Remember Scott Baio? Yeah, he's filling in. And then he'd go, wait a minute, what happened? I thought, wasn't Jane Fonda coming in on Friday? No, no, the chick that got thrown off the Disney, The UFC fighter. That's her name. What's her name? Yo, come on, you fought.

[Nithya Raman]

I trained with her and I. Riley.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Gaines is a swimmer.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, she's Thursday.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. What about my pillow guy?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, Michael Lindell. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Remember I told you Jamie Foxx is coming in? No, we got Michael Lindell. Oh, he's a last minute replacement. Yeah. So that's next week, kid. We're doing a whole Kid Rock week. That'll be the week. The week after that is the Kid Rock.

[Nithya Raman]

And musical guests. All right.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. So that's the New bookings. So if you'd like to be in with the Hollywood crowd. And Stern was the king of all media, but never got those people on his show. So you must be more accommodating to those people. Now I would like to live in a world where no one gave a shit and they just come on your show regardless. But those days are gone and Trump ended them.

[Nithya Raman]

I don't know. I think it's coming back. I think the fact that a lot of right wing personalities are like becoming well established and in that sphere people kind of have to, to get both sides of the eyeballs. What do you care if your movie, you know what I mean, it goes right wing or left wing dollars.

[Adam Carolla]

Here's the thing. If the numbers are so overwhelming, if you're going on a late night show that gets 900,000 views or Joe Rogan that gets 21 million views, then at some point commerce kicks in and you go, I'm gonna go. But that's with shows that have lots and lots of eyeballs in a world where everything's sort of in the middle somewhere, then those shows shall be boycotted. So that's how it goes. So. So Stern changed his politics and then changed his bookings and that's why he's talking to Jane Fonda and the like.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, it'll be interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

Who's a horrible person by the way.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, she's the worst.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It'll be interesting to see what happens after Trump. Cuz even though Trump overwhelmingly, you know, he's in office, most people wanted him there. It's still maybe a little bit the stink of the first term, you know, and a lot of people still have that lingering tds. It'll be interesting to see what happens, happens after Trump, whoever the next president is. How partisan.

[Adam Carolla]

They'll, they'll keep going. No J.D. vance, they're going to say the same thing. It's going to be a bunch of racist, racist misogynist talk or whatever. It'll be the same thing. It'll be losing our democracy. It'll be the exact same. They'll do it about, they'll try it on Mitt Romney. They'll just whoever racist. They're losing our democracy. Yeah, it'll, it'll be, be very interesting. All right, that's enough news because we gotta move on.

[Nithya Raman]

Well, I'm out.

[Adam Carolla]

Ross Douthat, who's a really interesting thinker and I know it cause I shared the stage with him in Austin a couple of weeks ago giving a sort of debate on religion. We're gonna talk to him. I'm gonna say bye to Chrissy and Mayhem and I will. I'll give everyone a plug after the show, but good job. We'll be right back right after this. O'reilly man. Love these guys, love their jingle. Oh, oh, oh. O'Reilly Auto Parts, they want to keep your car on the road. O'Reilly Auto Parts offers friendly, helpful service and parts and knowledgeable employees to maintain and repair your car as well. Well, I've always been a fan. I'm a car guy and I've always gone to O'Reilly because I got the best prices and experienced staff and I've used them. Back in the day when I was living in an apartment in North Hollywood, I'd go the one off of Laurel Canyon and then move to a rental house with a bunch of dudes in La Canada. Well, La Crescenta, but who's counting up off a foothill? That one's still there. I just passed by it the other day. Look, whether you're a car aficionado or you're an auto novice, you're going to find employees at O'Reilly. Well, they understand, they're knowledgeable, they're helpful and best of all, friendly. So stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts, do it today. Or you can Visit them at o'reillyauto.com Adam let them know you heard from me. I think they'll help you out. O'reillyauto.com Adam.

[Ross Douthat]

Adam Carolla is on the road. San Diego, April 11th and 12th at the American Comedy Club, Port Charlotte, Florida, May 2nd and 3rd at Bassani's Italian Steakhouse and Comedy Theater. And Melbourne, Florida on May 4th at the Melbourne Auditorium. Get tickets for these shows and a whole lot [e-mail] and now Alcoa presents Definitely Not Not a Jew on the Adam Carolla show. Dateline, Clearwater Beach, Florida. 66 and 60 year old sisters were arrested after a physical altercation when the older sister did not mention her niece.

[Adam Carolla]

In the eulogy for her father.

[Ross Douthat]

The father occurred at St. Brendan's Catholic Church. Definitely not a Jew.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, Ross Douthat is on the other end of this. I ran into Ross. Well, it was about three weeks ago. We did our debate.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Yeah, it was the angels wept, you know, you wiped the floor with me. Heaven was defeated, atheism triumphed. And now I'm back for more punishment. It's a pleasure.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you did a great job. I need the name of the woman to put the debate on, please. Thank you. Sorry, Barry. I was brain farting on Bari Weiss's names. I told my guys to put all the names on there, but I missed the one who put on the debate. But okay, now we got it. Sorry. Yeah, I wanted to. I was initially told I was gonna make the argument for religion, and I was happy about that, and I was happy to do it. And then I was informed I was making the argument against religion.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Well, you're a professional, Adam. You know, you were ready.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I thought you did a wonderful job. And I was listening to what you're saying, and I was sadly thinking I'm gonna have to argue against this. But I do agree, ostensibly, with what you were saying the whole time, Ross.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Well, it's good to know. It's good to know. I'm glad I did. Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, we ended up. My side ended up winning the debate with Michael Shermer, but it was a hollow victory for me.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Well, it was a setup where they pull the audience at these debates beforehand. And something like 75% of the audience was on our side. Our side was arguing that America needs a religious revival. And your side was saying, hell, no, even if you didn't believe in it. And so you guys moved the needle, I think, from like 75 to 65%. So we were still ahead at the end. I comfort myself with that. But you. You won over some waivers, so, you know, good job. God will get you in the end, you know, an extra year or two in purgatory for both of us probably.

[Adam Carolla]

But, yeah, you don't need to take the name off the screen that I asked you to put on the screen. By the way, sorry for being a douche this day, but I'm in a mood. It's weird. Why take it off. Okay. Anyway, sorry. Everything bugs me. That's gonna be the name of my next book. But, Ross. So the book, I should say it's a new book. Why Everyone Should Be religious. Compelling case for the rationality of religious belief in the modern world. So you did a great job up on stage in Austin. So why not do that now?

[Unnamed Speaker]

Sure. I can redo it now that I know that you're persuadable or gettable on the fence. The argument I made there was basically, there isn't one. Slam dunk, put the debate away. Argument for the existence of God or for being religious. It's more that there's a bunch of converging lines. And there are lines that include things that we know from science and reason and sort of modern discoveries and so on. And the first and most basic One is just, it's not just that the universe that we find ourselves in is orderly and beautiful and interesting and all of these things. It's also that we've figured out that it's fine tuned in all these crazy ways that give basically a sort of 1 in quadrillion chance of ending up with a planet like ours, life forms like ours, and so on. And so to be an atheist with that evidence, you basically have to convince yourself that there must be an infinity of other universes that we can't see. This is the multiverse, right? It's, you know, famous from Marvel movies and so on, but you need all of those universes to do away with. What is otherwise is pretty clear evidence that somebody set the whole system in motion with some kind of intention that probably included us. So that's the first line of argument. The second line of argument is that human consciousness, even with everything we know about neuroscience, the actual experience of consciousness, what it's like to be a human being, the fact that we can reason about the world, understand it, sort of step outside our impulses and ourselves, that's still incredibly mysterious. And there's this really interesting matchup between the big order of the cosmos and our ability to understand it. And when you get down into the really weird stuff in science nowadays, stuff in quantum physics, there's also a lot of arguments. And you know, this isn't just like California, Woo, Gwyneth Paltrow, you know, candle. Stuff like this is actually the science that suggests that our consciousness is sort of entangled with material reality, right? So it's like consciousness and the material go together. Consciousness maybe shapes the material world. This is why people in Silicon, Silicon Valley get into the idea that we're living in a simulation or something. But that's pretty interesting. And then you have just the resilience of religious experience that even in a world where lots of people are secular, official religion doesn't have a lot of power anymore. Most people don't go to church. People keep on having religious experiences of all shapes, sizes and forms. And you even get more of them of some kinds, right? You get a lot more near death experiences, for instance, in 21st century modernity than you ever did before. Because hey, guess what? We bring a lot more people back from the dead. So in the book I basically say, look, you take these three lines and you say, this is, you know, this is probably, this is what the world would look like if there was some kind of higher power that had some kind of interest in what we were doing. And if that's the case, life is short, death is certain. And there's a pretty good case for going to church or synagogue or your local mosque. You know, the book is trying to be ecumenical, but it's trying to make that argument. It's not just, you know, what we were doing at the debate was arguing in part about, you know, is religion good for America? And I spent a lot of time sort of tangling with the old new atheists, including Michael Shermer, who was your debating partner, and saying, look, you know, The New Atheists 15, 20 years ago said, guess what? If we get rid of religion, America will be more enlightened, more scientific, more rational, less polarized, all these things. And everyone can see that isn't the case. And so maybe, maybe religion was actually doing something important in society all along. And I think that's true, but I'm trying to get a little bit beyond that. I'm not just saying be religious because it's good for you. You'll be a better husband or father, you'll feel better about the world. I'm saying there's probably a God, makes a lot of sense of a lot of things about the world. You should probably take it seriously while there's time to do so.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, my general philosophies, I just sort of act as if like maybe there's a God, maybe there's not a God, but I'm just to live as if there is one, even though I don't really think there is one. But I'll just not screw people over and kind of take care of people and be semi righteous. I like the Ten Commandments. As I said, I'm a big fan of the Ten Commandments, but all of them.

[Unnamed Speaker]

You're sure you're not carving a graven image in the back of the pot? I mean, there's always one that people, that people struggle with.

[Adam Carolla]

I, you know, I mean, I get that my neighbor in Burbank doesn't have an oxen to covet, but I, or maybe she does.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Not that you know of.

[Adam Carolla]

I haven't really. Oxen situation, don't covet.

[Unnamed Speaker]

I saw something about a guy who had to take down a big tree house in la. Yeah. So, you know, somebody coveted their neighbor's tree house and called the city on them. But I guess, why do you.

[Adam Carolla]

Let's break that down. Let's break that down for a second. Yeah, I had the bizarre experience of being a former builder in LA and having to pull permits times a million projects and doing great battle with the permitting department in LA constantly. Cause as you can imagine, it's over regulated. And I literally was looking at a rental home because I got displaced in the Malibu fire that was one street over. And as I was driving home from looking at the rental house, I commented, and I said, look at that tree house. And my girlfriend said, wow, that's amazing. And then the next thing out of my mouth is, I can't believe LA has let him build a tree house in his front yard. Which is bad. It means LA is bad. But I was looking at it from a builder perspective, and I just said, I can't believe they let him do that. I can't believe they haven't torn that thing down. And three days later they were tearing it down.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Well, see, you had an intimation of the divine right there. The divine prophecy spoke through you, Adam.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, but was the neighbor who complained, was that neighbor coveting the tree house, or was that just sort of some Karen who was bored?

[Unnamed Speaker]

I think if we invoked some kind of rabbinic authority on the Ten Commandments, they would say that the idea of coveting your neighbor's things is a broader category than just, I want it for myself. It can also be, I'm envious that this person has this thing and I have an impulse to do away with it. You know, I think there's. I mean, I think any good reading of the Ten Commandments says each one goes a little bit beyond just the letter of the law. So, yeah, I think anyone who looks at a tree house in their neighbor's yard, especially one that. I think it had been here for a long time. Right. I saw the video of the guy taking it down. He had all these people talking, you know, giving testimonials their kids had played in it. Anyone who looks at that and says, you know, fuck you, I'm calling the city, is in violation of the will of Yahweh, I think.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And, Dawson, you can find it somewhere, because I forgot to get into it. But there was. Oh, there's so much to talk about. Nithya Raman, the dingbat who gave the speech about Toyota being responsible for the thefts of their catalytic converters because they were making it so easy to steal that same dingbat. Her office was the one who was in charge of. You know, it's so funny. I said, and I say this to everybody. I go, listen. When you're listening to Nithya Raman who went to Harvard.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Nobody'S perfect.

[Adam Carolla]

I try to tell everyone, the dingbat who's giving you the speech blaming Toyota for making their catalytic converter so easy to steal, even though it's welded into the center of the car. That same dingbat is making other policy. She's taking her dingbat brain and bringing it to treehouse safety. You see, it's not just that, it's this. And I found out that that was her office. And she gave. They made a comment, a statement. And the statement, I'll paraphrase, but the statement basically said, look, we get it, it's not a good look, but we have to deal with the safety concerns of the neighbor. And my whole thing is, do you have to deal with the safety concerns of the neighbor who should be following the Ten Commandments?

[Unnamed Speaker]

Is the neighbor climbing the treehouse? Does the neighbor go up in the tree and sit there and think, oh, man, I could really fall out of this treehouse. I just climbed up. Somebody, I mean, is the neighbor. I guess the neighbor. Is the neighbor, finds themselves tempted, maybe by the glory of the treehouse. That could be.

[Adam Carolla]

My thing, whenever I read these articles is, no, you do not need to concern yourself with a crazy person's prejudice. Like, for some reason, this person doesn't like this tree house. I don't know what that sound is, but I'm hearing a weird little chime. Oh, okay. Either way, we'll. We have that. We have the statement there, Dawson. Sorry, if somebody has it, it's crazy. But literally the week before, I was explaining that Nithya Raman with her 10 cent head is applying that to many other facets of things that affect your life. That same dingbat was in charge of COVID decisions as well that shut schools down for a year and a half. So, please, even though it's entertaining to see these idiots talk about catalytic converters and blame Toyota to understand their damage is spread out far wider than just catalytic converters.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Yeah, I mean, and we're, you know, and we're talking here honestly about I think, what's one of the big stumbling blocks to people believing in God? Which is even if. Even if they could partially buy into some of the arguments I just sketched, which is, you know, the problem of evil. Right. The world is a flawed and fallen place. And obviously there are worse things than officious bureaucrats taking down tree houses. But, you know, I think a lot of people naturally look around and say, what kind of God would make a world where, you know, the officious bureaucrat, where an angel doesn't descend and stop the officious bureaucrat, to say nothing of. Of worse things, what's the temperature?

[Adam Carolla]

And we'll find that comment at some point. I liked tweeted it. I'm pretty sure it was the official comment from her office on the Treehouse. So it's gotta be some. But here's the question, Ross. The New York Times, they had an op ed piece a week ago that basically said maybe we got duped on the whole Covid origin story, which is like, welcome to the party, New York Times, everyone knew that that's five years old now, but all right, the New York Times is having to correct a little bit or shift direction a little bit or let in some voices that maybe they wouldn't hear several years ago. You see a little bit of it on cnn. You know, some of it is financial. The LA Times is undergoing a transition back to sort of normal reporting instead of advocacy for left wing causes. What's it like for a religious dude like you working over there at the New York Times? And have you noticed a change in temperature or attitude?

[Unnamed Speaker]

I mean, I think every. Without, you know, I'm not gonna go deep into my own workplace except to say that the religion part of my life has always been pretty welcome at the Times, I think. I think.

[Adam Carolla]

How long have you been at the Times?

[Unnamed Speaker]

I've been at the times since 2009, so a hell of a long, heck of a long time, I should say. And my impression on the religion stuff is always that even in these really liberal and secular spaces, which, you know, obviously big newspapers tend to be, there's lots of people who are interested in religion, intrigued by it, have a certain respect for it, and just can't quite get over the hump of really believing. But if you believe, they take you seriously, if you're serious about it. I think in terms of institutions as a whole, you know, every major institution in America went a little nuts in the COVID era in the summer of 2020 in particular, it's a combination of the pandemic, everything shut down. Donald Trump, you know, the sort of anti Trumpism, the George Floyd protests, everything else and every institution, colleges, newspapers, you know, poetry societies who like purged their membership because it was supposed to be an anti racist gesture. So all those institutions have spent a certain amount of time trying to sort of walk back from those positions. And frankly, like just, I think just this week the University of California system announced that they weren't going to require DEI statements from prospective faculty, which is something that they had put in late in the Trump era. So they are like the UC University system, certainly one of the more liberal enterprises in America has sort of passed its past peak wokeness. Right. Whatever else. But the other thing just, I think this is more a point about the last year or so. I think there was always a sense for a lot of people in elite institutions that, you know, there was normalcy and then there was Trump and Covid and those things disrupted normalcy. But normalcy was, Barack Obama is president, Liberalism is sort of in the driver's seat. Liberals know what they're doing, conservatives don't. You can trust liberal institutions. And a lot of the reckoning that I think we're seeing is just a sense that like actually that normalcy, that world isn't, isn't coming back. I was listening to you talking earlier going back and forth about like, which shows people get invited on, you know, do celebrities go on conservative shows, these kind of things. And I do think, I think there's just been a change in the media landscape just in the last few years where, like, if you look at how, just at how Trump ran for president, right, Going on Theo Vaughn's show, going on Joe Rogan show, all these kind of things, there's just a whole media universe that was just not really there four or five years ago. And that, you know, that universe comes with problems. Like, I don't think you want to, if you're a critic of the liberal establishment, you don't want to over romanticize the alternatives and say, ah, everything Joe Rogan talks about is going to be smart because, you know, everything the New York Times says was wrong or something like, Joe Rogan's had some guests on his show just in the last few months where I've been like, what, you know, what, what are you, what are you doing there? Right? So every, every institution can have its problems. But I do think there's a real sense right now that whatever is happening, we're not going back, we're not going back to the Obama era. We're in a new, much weirder world. And, and everyone is sort of wrestling with that fact.

[Adam Carolla]

But when you go to work, does it feel a little different than it felt five years ago, let's say, like I said, I don't know. That seems to be the general vibe I'm getting. But could you feel anything?

[Unnamed Speaker]

I would say for me personally, as a conservative who writes a lot for a liberal audience, there was a period, especially right after the election where, you know, I had predicted that Trump was going to win when most people I knew in the liberal world thought Kamala was going to win. And I felt like I had sort of analyzed the election correctly. And, yeah, I think, I think, you know, I think I had a certain, A certain sense of, you know, that I understood certain things about the world. Right. That maybe parts of the liberal intelligentsia didn't. Now, again, though, that can change really quickly. Right. Like, if the Trump presidency goes badly, nobody's going to be like, hey, Ross Douthed, he. That guy's a genius. You know, you gotta listen to him. Right. Like every. Everything can change. But, yes, I think, I think post election, Trump winning so handily, winning the popular vote, all of these things, there was definitely a spirit of sort of. Of reassessment in a lot of places.

[Adam Carolla]

We have the statement. Was I correct about this? It was from Nithya Raman's office.

[Ross Douthat]

Yeah. Andrew Reesmeyer, who is covering the story for ktla, responded to you you about this. He said he's been covering the treehouse story. And this from the councilwoman's office. The treehouse only came to the attention of the city because of concerns brought up by community members. I have deep empathy for how frustrating it is to deal with the city's bureaucracy, but our office's goal was always to preserve the treehouse while addressing community concerns. I sincerely wish that we had been able to have a different outcome and that we had more time to bring about a better resolution.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so your goal was to save the tree house, but you sent orders out to destroy the treehouse.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Well, so that's not, that's not the spirit of, you know, a vibe shift or reassessment, because a big part of what went wrong for liberals in the last five or ten years is contained just in the language of community members. Right. It's the idea that you have this thing called the community, and there are people who can claim to speak for the community, which in politics means activist groups. In neighborhood communities, it means the person who's mad about the treehouse. Right. And they, and they're. They're the voice of the community, and they get this special deference. Right. And so a lot of liberalism just went in for the idea that you have these activists, they speak for racial or religious minorities, they represent them. You have to listen to the activists. And then in the end, you know, the racial minorities went and voted for Trump. Right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Unnamed Speaker]

That's the liberal problem in a nutshell.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, first off, the guy who worked as a writer for the Simpsons, who I would guess would be typically liberal, is not voting liberal anymore because he just got jacked up by Liberal policies, essentially. So Nithia's wanted to save the treehouse, but the concerns were the community. By the way, once we started letting them use terms like community, all of a sudden we went, oh, okay, worry about the community. I wanna be specific. What danger is posed to the community for this 23 year old treehouse that people grew up enjoying? And then I would just go, why don't we put it to a community vote then everybody on hesby street, there's 10 houses on one side, there's 10 houses on his block, on one block of Hesby street, take a vote. Let's just see, see who wins here, here. But she's worried about the community also. This is another one of those answers that's a non answer, which is she wants to address the problem of catalytic converter theft, but she blames the manufacturer of the automobile that has the catalytic converter welded to it for the theft of the catalytic converter, which means she's not going to make any progress in this department. And she wants the treehouse saved, but regrettably it's gone. So I don't know, possibly she's not effective. Ross, I should play you the catalytic converter clip just because it'll make you laugh. It'll bring a lot of, a lot of joy. A lot of joy. It's 45 seconds. I played it a million times. But it is so good. But not only is it good, just here's all you need to do. If anybody says, what is this group about? Like, what happened to Los Angeles? Why are these super blue cities failing? What is going on? If somebody, if a friend of yours moves here from Hungary and goes, what happened to Los Angeles? Just play him the treehouse story and then play him this tape in this case. I think one of the things that really infuriates me is that we have a company, you know, the Prius, whatever, Toyota, who makes the Prius, that essentially has a device on their cars which is super easy to remove. It's basically the value of a MacBook, right? That is put in a place that is incredibly easy to access in your car. And then the thefts related to this issue have essentially all of the costs of that are given to us to bear instead of them having to manufacture a car that actually is not so easy to be stolen. All right, so we're doomed.

[Unnamed Speaker]

That's, that's, that's beautiful.

[Adam Carolla]

It's beautiful.

[Unnamed Speaker]

I mean, the human situation is an amazing comedy.

[Adam Carolla]

It is. When you were a child, did you ever think adults would be this Stupid. And I'm not being facetious, like, I.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Mean, not when I was a child, but I did grow up and read about the 1970s, Adam. And so, you know, American society goes through these cycles, I think, where the cities get safer and then people forget and do stupid things and then cities get dangerous again. And you hope that the cycle works its way back to something better, which it will, once you're mayor of Los Angeles.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I mean, the fact that that person. Could you imagine the look on that guy's face when you go, who's in charge of saving your treehouse? Nithya Raman. I'll go get the crowbar and the hammer and start tearing it down now. There wasn't a chance in hell some sane person who was in the city council was gonna step up and yell, are you guys all fucking nuts? This guy built a treehouse? What country are we living in? What year is it? There's homeless encampments everywhere. Malibu's burned to the ground. Altadena's burnt to the ground.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Well, you don't want the homeless person climbing the tree, Adam. I mean, that's the danger right there. You just put your finger on it.

[Adam Carolla]

He could sprain his ankle. Cuz he'd be up there snorting fentanyl and then fall out of that tree house. And then we're gonna have a lawsuit on our hands. Yeah, Ross, what for you. You got the book Believe, and Ross was very impressive. I'm telling you, I don't always just.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Make jokes about tree houses.

[Adam Carolla]

No, he was up on it.

[Unnamed Speaker]

I'm a distinguished public intellectual too.

[Nithya Raman]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And I was half baked and unprepared for my opening statement and beyond. And I was like, oh, man, Ross has really showed up, prepared for this debate. And I was impressed. I just thought, oh, this guy's sharp.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Since I'm so sharp. My one question for you is, which wasn't fully answered at the debate, but what's your number one reason for not believing in God?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I think there's a couple of ways you can get to not believing in God. One is it could be foisted on you as a young age, and then you could reject it at some point. Which are the worst people? They're the sort of violent atheists, you know, like aggressive, like Penn Jillette, you know, like weird, angry, motivated atheist, you know, and then, I mean, it is.

[Unnamed Speaker]

It'S, you know, there are people who have legitimately bad experiences in religion, and any religious person has to have some sympathy for that impulse. But go on. So Then there's. Then there's the more relaxed.

[Adam Carolla]

Then there's the people that grew up in a vacuum of religion, which is no anything. Which would mean. And then you'd have to kind of go, well, why not Hindu? Or why not Judaism or why not another religion? It's like, well, there were none of them. They all stood the best chance in my world. There wasn't any religion of any kind. So then. Because I think. Ross, I think you may. And I don't mean this in a condescending way but I think a lot of people think the default setting is religion. But it's not really the default setting. In a complete vacuum of religiosity if there's nothing and it's never spoken of and you never go to church and it's just never even discussed, then it's just like some food that you didn't eat. I never tried poi. And all the Hawaiians would be confused, and I'd go it. And I didn't have anything against poi. It just didn't exist. It was never discussed.

[Unnamed Speaker]

So, no, no, no. I find that totally, totally understandable. And honestly, that's one of the reasons I wrote this book the way I did. There's a lot of books about religion that are like, you know, here's why you have to be a Christian. Here's why Christians are right and Muslims are wrong and these kind of things. Or, you know, these kind of things. And I felt like we're in a society now where there's just a lot more people who have your kind of experience than there ever used to be. Be people for whom it's like religion is just not on offer.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Unnamed Speaker]

And so the book. The book is trying to be an introduction. It's like, hey, hey, Adam. You know, here's why. Here's why someone might eat koi. Here's why someone, you know, might. Might be really into Jamaican cuisine or something. Except it's God, the author of the universe, who will judge your soul after your death. So it's even more important.

[Adam Carolla]

That's, I don't know, believe is the name of the book. Ross, always great, great chat.

[Unnamed Speaker]

It was great. Adam, thanks so much for having me.

[Adam Carolla]

It was my pleasure. Hope to have you back soon. All right. I'm going to be in San Diego doing shows at the American Comedy Club, doing standup on the 11th and 12th April. Religious or atheists, come on down. You shall not be judged. And you can go to ambercroll.com for our live shows. And then There's Chrissy Mayer her podcast Chrissy Mayer Podcast podcast available now. And find out her live dates all over the place out there. Until next time, this is Adam for Ross and Chrissy and Mayhem saying mahalo.

[Ross Douthat]

Make sure you get your tickets to see the Ace man in San Diego next in [e-mail] pick up your phone and leave us a voicemail. At 8:88 6 we find 41744. Say something nice.

[Adam Carolla]

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