
Comedians Felipe Esparza & Jessimae Peluso return to the show and they open by discussing Jessimae’s recent podcast with John Stamos, Felipe’s obsession with The Bionic Woman’s Lindsay Wagner, and the...
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Adam Carolla
Well, in this episode, very funny comedian Felipe Esparza is back. Jessame Paluso, very funny comedian is back. Actor, author, filmmaker Justine Bateman comes in for a very interesting conversation. We'll do all that right after this.
Felipe Esparza
I love reality TV on Pluto tv Same. And I love that it's free. It gives me the freedom to watch Bravo's Real Housewives Vault channel. I'm totally free to watch Bad Girls Club. I'm free for Jersey Shore love and hip hop. I'm free free all day. Survivor. I'm free all night. With hundreds of free reality shows, you are totally free to watch what you love on Pluto tv. Pluto TV stream now. Hey, never.
Adam Carolla
Hey, fans of freedom and open discussion. I'm heading over to Substack and there's an ad free audio and video version of the Adam Carolla show that's going to be waiting there in the near future. You'll even be able to watch ACS live unedited as we record it, participate in the show via live chat. That'll be coming up very soon. You also get an ad free version of the Adam Kurl and Dr. Drew show. You also get an exclusive to my new podcast, Beat it out where I share unpolished ideas with my comedian buddies. The first series of episodes is going to be J. Moore. You'll get all this and more for the low, low price of nine bucks a month. A pittance for all we're going to bring. You subscribe now@adamcarolla.com substack and I'll see all of you in our new speakeasy called Substance.
Jessie Mae Peluso
From Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Corolla Show. Adam's guest today, comedians Felipe Esparza and Jessie Mae Paluszo, plus author and filmmaker Justine Bateman. And now, just in case he checked Felipe's papers before the mics heated up, Adam Carolla.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, get it on. Got to get on a choice, but they got a mandate. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks for sharing with a friend. Jessie Mae Paluso. Back in studio, Felipe Esparza as well. Dates coming up, Funny Bone, Omaha, Nebraska. There'll be November 22nd through 23rd. Very funny. Live comedian Jessie May Peluso. So check that out. Funny Bone Syracuse. Coming up, Kimmel's club in Vegas. Coming up, Felipe's got dates all over the world. He's live and worldwide. You can go to their website as well, jessiemay.com for all the dates are up there.
Justine Bateman
Yes, sir.
Adam Carolla
Thank you, Felipe. Your website, Felipe's World, Philippe's World.com as well. All right, let me ask you guys this. Do you feel there's something that bothers me? And what bothers me is a lack of people's knowledge on shit they should know about. But everyone is way too casual with stuff. Like I said, you go in and you're looking at a $75,000 car, and you don't get two questions deep before the guy goes, yeah, I gotta go back and check the thing. And it's like, I just asked you. It comes with a V6 or V8. And you're like, let me check on that. Like it's a $75,000 car. The thing that really gets me is I go again, if you want to buy a $400 smartphone, the person will know everything about it. If you buy a $7 sub sandwich, the person will know more about it than the person selling you an $80,000 car. But two days ago, I'm going for a walk in Malibu. I'm walking up the hill, and I literally just pass a sign that says open house. And I go, all right, it's open. Open house. I'm just walk in and look around. $7.6 million. And I say to the woman, the realtor, what year was it built? And she goes, you want $7.6 million and you can't commit to 1987. It's on a sheet. You could bring the sheet home if you were waiting in any airport in America, you could memorize that sheet in 14 minutes. So I go, what year? She goes, yeah, I don't know. I have to check that sheet. I go, how many square feet is it? She goes, to check that sheet. I'm like, all you need to know is how many square feet. It's the number one. Why would you. Why do people feel like they do not have to commit this to memory? And why is it so difficult? And by the way, I walked through the house once. The bitch told me, oh, gosh, I'm angry.
Justine Bateman
She's already a bitch.
Adam Carolla
She told me 3,600 square feet, and I'll remember that for the rest of my life. What is going on, people? Are we getting dumb? Are we getting lazy? What's going on? You're selling a seven and a half million dollar house. You don't know what year it was built, and you don't know how many square feet it was. And I know people don't like numbers and stuff, but square footage is pretty much all we're talking about when it comes to real estate, because it's price per square foot. That's kind of how it breaks down basic knowledge.
Justine Bateman
I don't mind a realtor not knowing things. What bothers me is if a doctor doesn't know something. If you're going in with a. Like a medical symptom and you're like, well, is it a problem with my. Is it my lungs? And he's got to go, let me just. Let me check the sheet. That would bother me more and make me more worried. If a doctor didn't know anything about the specific body he himself or she herself specializes in.
Adam Carolla
Has that happened frequently?
Justine Bateman
Well, just recently, I went to get like, a checkup, and they said they were too full. And they sent a blood pressure monitor and a weight. A scale for me to do the whole thing at home.
Adam Carolla
Really?
Justine Bateman
Yeah. So it's kind of what's going on. People just aren't working anymore, and we're having to do it ourselves and figure out the information.
Adam Carolla
I don't want to defend the doctors, but I think if you come in and you go, like, my back hurts or something. They have. There's five things that could be. But square footage, there's not a lot of error, right?
Justine Bateman
There's only one square footage.
Adam Carolla
It's just go home. 1987, 3,600 square foot, 7.6 million bucks. That's it. It's in my head. I don't need all the other information. That one, right? If I asked when was the last termite inspection, you can go, oh, you know what? Let me check the sheet. That's fine. That's not the basic. Is what I'm saying.
Justine Bateman
Everyone's dumb.
Dr. Drew
I had a.
Adam Carolla
They're lazy.
Dr. Drew
Down the street on Central, there's a clinic, and I was getting my blood drawn and the gather drawing my blood. He was like a guy that probably used to gangbang back in the day. And he. The ex gang banger, he had a lot of tattoos on his hands. And then I started questioning him, you know, like I was, how do you get this? Maybe he, like, he killed the guy earlier to get. To get to me. So, Matt, Tito, man, how did you get this job? He goes, do you have a certificate? Did you go to school for this? He go, nah, Holmes. Back in the day, you didn't need no certificate for this job, babe. That's how I got the job. So he's driving my blood, and now he thinks I was joking here when I asked him that question. So he starts joking too. And he starts tapping my vein. He starts tapping like he's Gonna put heroin in his head. And then he goes, ah, you tar. But then he drew my blood. And this guy, he knew everything. He knew how to do everything without ever going to school for it. He just learned everything as it went along.
Brad Williams
Well, that's old school.
Justine Bateman
I feel like old school, Right? This is the new school. If you're not.
Dr. Drew
But now you gotta. When you go to do that now, you gotta go to three places, right?
Adam Carolla
Yeah. Look, we shouldn't have all this regulation for, like, hair cutting. If you're a barber, you've been doing it. You did it in the military for 14 years, or you get out. You shouldn't have to have it like a state bar to fucking open a barbershop.
Dr. Drew
You should just.
Adam Carolla
Look, here's the deal with most of this stuff. You go in, get a shitty haircut, you don't come back. You go in and get a good haircut. You do come back, you don't really care if the guy has a certificate to do it or not.
Justine Bateman
I've never looked on a wall to see if there was one.
Dr. Drew
No, just go to the barber who doesn't have bad breath.
Adam Carolla
Everybody. Everybody who builds your house. Every single guy I ever worked with on a construction site. Nobody read a book. Nobody took a test. All they did was build houses. That's all they did. There was no manual. They didn't. There wasn't an oral or written test. They didn't get certified. They were just journeyman carpenters. Only because that's all they did was build houses. All right, let's see. I got a Jesse May. You had a little thing with Stamos the other day.
Justine Bateman
A little thing?
Adam Carolla
Yeah, I saw it on the Internet.
Justine Bateman
It was practically a marriage proposal.
Adam Carolla
He came in and did your podcast.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, he came into my podcast. It was very exciting. He's very. He's a gem of a human being.
Adam Carolla
He's a nice guy.
Justine Bateman
He's a gem.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. Mm.
Justine Bateman
And I'm happy that there. It seems to be an immaculate history for him as far as an individual in entertainment. Cause everyone else is crumbling to the floor around us, so it's nice to see.
Adam Carolla
In what way? What do you mean? Like, the reputation of getting me to Ed and stuff like that. All of that.
Justine Bateman
The Cosby's of it all. You're like, oh, well, I love the show, but that's a horrible human being.
Adam Carolla
Right.
Justine Bateman
So I was.
Dr. Drew
You know, he puts stuff in people's drinks, too.
Justine Bateman
No, Cosby did not. Stamos.
Adam Carolla
To clarify, no Stamos.
Dr. Drew
I saw stable in A movie back in the day. An action film with him and Vanity starting.
Adam Carolla
Really? What.
Justine Bateman
Do you remember what it was?
Dr. Drew
It was an action star with a badass movie and he drove a Corvette and there's a scene where they're trying to get away from him.
Adam Carolla
Vanity from Prince.
Dr. Drew
Yes.
Justine Bateman
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
RIP Nikki Six lady. He was. It was the first. It was an action scene. And John Stable. Vanity. Are trying to get away from these bad guys. And then they. They make a left and they go under a trailer and they ride the trailer under the car. There it is. I saw them with the movie.
Adam Carolla
I thought you were super high and just made this up. Never too young to die.
Dr. Drew
Never too young to die. Yeah.
Justine Bateman
That's great.
Adam Carolla
All right.
Dr. Drew
It was a white version of Fast and Furious. No, that movie. Fucking the Black Samurai. What's the name?
Adam Carolla
Oh, the Black Samurai.
Justine Bateman
I can't even think of what that is.
Dr. Drew
It was a black karate guy.
Adam Carolla
Cleopatra Jones. Can I say this about Stamos? He doesn't have to drug women to have sex. There's a line forming outside of his trailer.
Justine Bateman
For sure.
Adam Carolla
Right?
Justine Bateman
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That they're. They're bringing their own drugs.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. They roofie themselves in the back of the Uber heading over to Stamos's place.
Justine Bateman
Well, you don't want to forget that experience. It's more of like a, you know, any kind of drug you want that.
Adam Carolla
It'S not a roofie.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, you don't want to forget that. You're not trying to black out during Stamos.
Adam Carolla
I was just sticking with the Cosby.
Justine Bateman
Scene, but I see what you're saying. I see what you're saying.
Adam Carolla
So he doesn't. Who needs to roofie the least?
Justine Bateman
Stamos.
Adam Carolla
Stamos.
Justine Bateman
Rob Lowe.
Adam Carolla
Rob Lowe.
Justine Bateman
Denzel. Even today, Denzel still is a strapping gentleman. Who do you think? Felipe Clooney. Clooney.
Adam Carolla
Who needs the roofie chicks the least? I mean, you and I'd be pretty high up on the roofies.
Dr. Drew
Alba.
Justine Bateman
Idris Elba.
Adam Carolla
Idris Elba.
Dr. Drew
He just shows up and starts speaking with a breeze. I said, are you doing there?
Adam Carolla
Right. Okay, so no roofies for him.
Justine Bateman
Jason Statham.
Adam Carolla
Are you gonna call me James Bond?
Dr. Drew
The new one? Who is the new Audrey Craig?
Justine Bateman
Oh, yeah, yeah. That's another one.
Adam Carolla
All right, so Stamos doesn't need roofies, but he did your show.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, it was a lot of fun.
Adam Carolla
Let me ask you guys this question. I find a lot of good looking dudes in Hollywood are exceedingly nice, interesting, and I think they Overcompensate because we think they're going to be douchebags because of how good looking they are and they actually try harder. Same thing I do with black people. I go, I'm nicer to black people than to white people because I'm overcompensating. Maybe because for my racism. Our past includes you as well, blondie.
Justine Bateman
I don't know what you've been doing.
Adam Carolla
Nations very troublesome past. I don't want them to think, no, I don't want them to know I'm racist. So I overcompensate. I'm nicer. And I think good looking dudes can't read.
Dr. Drew
So they're douchebags. Good looking guys can't read. Half of them can't read. Well, they really have to be nice. And there's a lot of dumb actors out there and football players that became actor who really can't read. And you have to deal with it. And you can't go around telling man, reading with this guy, man, he's getting paid more and everybody can't read for shit. He's the nicest guy.
Adam Carolla
You have to be nice to.
Dr. Drew
He's the nicest guy. You know what?
Adam Carolla
So if you have dyslexia, you got a sweet.
Dr. Drew
He gave, they gave him a bonus and then he gave some of his pay to the cameraman because he's an idiot and he can't read. So he's a nice guy. He buys pizzas for everybody.
Justine Bateman
I think nice is a term that is tossed around that doesn't always equate a kind good person. Like he said Ted Bundy was nice.
Adam Carolla
It's spackle. They're covering something. But what I'm saying is he's nice.
Dr. Drew
But he didn't like spices or seasoning. He was eating those people without seasoning.
Justine Bateman
Yeah. Can you imagine bland like if you. You got to season a human for sure.
Adam Carolla
I couldn't get tuna out of the can. I'd have to. I got to put some relish and mustard and mayonnaise. Forget about human flesh.
Justine Bateman
We're putting some paprika on there.
Adam Carolla
Just Taylor Swift, it's funny. Brought a paprika because I got that on my list. I'm a witch or you saw my list.
Justine Bateman
I didn't look.
Adam Carolla
Okay.
Justine Bateman
I'm tapped into the vortex.
Adam Carolla
Taylor Swift has to be nice too because people want to hate her and think she's going to be a bitch. Right. So she's got to be super sacrony sweet like soup. You got to come across as Real nice. Yeah, I believe Stamos, though.
Justine Bateman
He's gen. He's kind.
Adam Carolla
Right.
Justine Bateman
He came in with gifts.
Adam Carolla
Gifts.
Justine Bateman
A genuine spirit. He asked my. I couldn't even ask my questions. He asked me so many things about myself. Also called me gorgeous about four times.
Adam Carolla
Really?
Justine Bateman
Yeah. I'm not a home wrecker. That he has a beautiful wife, beautiful life. I'm just a huge fan. And he was so kind.
Adam Carolla
The gorgeous. Here's why it's difficult.
Justine Bateman
Oh, God. I feel insult coming.
Adam Carolla
No.
Justine Bateman
Okay.
Adam Carolla
The problem with sexual harassment is if you're fat, ugly, scary, creepy guy, and you go, hey, gorgeous. You go, fuck this guy. I'm reporting him. But when you're hot and you go gorgeous, go fresh. So we don't know what to do.
Justine Bateman
It's presumptuous. So you're not a fat, ugly girl. You're not a fat, ugly person. So it's like, how do you know what that person's gonna react?
Adam Carolla
Like, anytime you work in an office setting, there's always one creepy guy in the office that the hot receptionist gives her the fucking shivers when he goes by. And that guy, if he makes a comment like, oh, man, that's a nice skirt. The chicks totally freak. She's like this fucking perv weirdo. The good looking, cool guy can walk in and go, someone got banged this weekend. And you go, that's what it is. So we don't know what to do.
Dr. Drew
But the fat.
Adam Carolla
It's not consistent. So you can say whatever he wants.
Dr. Drew
He can say, fat, ugly guy always says a fat, ugly thing too, though. Yeah, I remember my friend, he's ugly. We're watching a movie and Chase sand is about to kill his hot ass chick. And my friend taps us on the shoulder, hey, man, how come you don't fuck her first before he kills her?
Justine Bateman
The ugly friend asset.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. In front of everybody at the movie theater. How come you don't fuck her first?
Justine Bateman
That's dark.
Dr. Drew
You know how we do it? No, bro, I don't know how you do it.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, that's creepy.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. You gotta just take this guy to the drive in. Don't take him to the general. You know, roll the windows up. Just you and him in the Caprice class.
Dr. Drew
He needs to watch that movie by himself in the bathroom on a plane.
Adam Carolla
All right, so should we see a little Stamos? I think we got a clip. You put it out on Instagram? I saw it.
Justine Bateman
He gave me the doll. He gave me a doll of himself.
Dr. Drew
Oh, Gossoom.
Justine Bateman
Isn't that awesome? From Full house from the 80s.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. When he was playing with the Full House right on the episode.
Justine Bateman
Yes. From.
Adam Carolla
Yes. Not black either.
Justine Bateman
Look at the size of the doll.
Adam Carolla
What's my story?
Justine Bateman
Comes with an outfit and a beautiful smile and a great personality.
Adam Carolla
Tune in to the Jessie May Peluso Show.
Dr. Drew
He's the only guy I know that can play himself in a movie.
Justine Bateman
I don't know if you know him, but kind of a big deal. I made fun of myself being a fan in this clip.
Adam Carolla
Are you big Full Houser?
Justine Bateman
Oh, my gosh. I grew up on that show.
Adam Carolla
I like it as well.
Justine Bateman
It was so wholesome and it, you know, for someone. I grew up in a home that everyone refers to as a broken home. My parents divorced. So to watch that show with three guys living in a house with a bunch of kids, it made me feel less weird about my situation.
Adam Carolla
Well, this is an interesting question, because I know all of us come from less than desirable backgrounds.
Justine Bateman
Speak for yourself, Adam.
Adam Carolla
Carolla, you just said you came from a broken home. I don't. I mean, listen, I'm not going to use white trash for Felipe, but. No, you come from a pretty broke. I know about your past.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, everything was broken, all right?
Adam Carolla
Everything was broken.
Dr. Drew
The beds, the tv.
Adam Carolla
Everything was broken. In my dreams, everything.
Dr. Drew
There was no hope.
Adam Carolla
Hyman. Everything, all right?
Dr. Drew
Cops will show up and they would take one of us away.
Adam Carolla
So everything's broken. And this spars it.
Dr. Drew
Back when we were kids, there was the cops. Ali PD Shout out AliPD, Holland, back division. They will go around the door, like to greet everybody and they will give away presents to the kids. And I remember we would never ask the door because we were. We were in trouble or something. But one day we asked for the door and they gave us a bunch of toys.
Adam Carolla
Free Stamos doll.
Dr. Drew
You know what? Better than that.
Adam Carolla
Better.
Dr. Drew
You don't do better.
Adam Carolla
Am I right?
Dr. Drew
Better.
Adam Carolla
Brook and Jessie Mason, right there.
Jessie Mae Peluso
Better.
Dr. Drew
It was John Travolta. The Sweat Hugs.
Adam Carolla
You got a Travolta doll?
Dr. Drew
Yeah, the Travolta Washington.
Adam Carolla
I bet they just swapped the heads. For sure. I bet Mattel just used the same skinny body and just swapped the heads.
Justine Bateman
Yep, same body, same teeth.
Adam Carolla
All right, so you grew up. Well, I don't know if they do the. I think that that's getting pretty granular.
Justine Bateman
Just stick with me on this, okay?
Adam Carolla
All right. So you grew up in a less than desirable.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, a good housing projects.
Adam Carolla
All right? I grew up in a shit box with fucked up parents and divorce and welfare and Food stamps. Jessie May, your parents were divorced?
Justine Bateman
One of my bad. I mean, it was difficult, sure, but my parents were loving my mom.
Adam Carolla
They were loving.
Justine Bateman
My mom moved in. The neighbor's dad, my parents too, they.
Dr. Drew
Took it around and we didn't get on. We were not on welfare. We had like seven kids. If they were to give a welfare man, we would have moved to a mansion.
Adam Carolla
Did your mom love you?
Dr. Drew
Oh, yeah, they loved it. But they were working all the time, so there was like they were never around.
Adam Carolla
I think I had it. I. I may have. I may have had a little better financially, but my mom didn't like me and neither my dad. So that, that. Then we got it with, you know.
Justine Bateman
We got a deficit.
Adam Carolla
We got to deficit. All right, so everything was bad. Now here's the question that's worse. Here's. Oh, yeah. When your parents don't like your leads.
Dr. Drew
Back, getting murdered every day is worse.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, the cops and his parents liked him. Sound like you, only.
Dr. Drew
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
All right, so now you would watch Full House because you would go, wow, this is a breath of fresh air in this very depressing environment. And this is aspirational. This is what it could be if you did it right.
Brad Williams
Yes.
Adam Carolla
Okay. And then. So there's kind of two heads on it. There is. We're young people. You can either take this young nine year old who may be getting into trouble and on the wrong path, and you can take him to UCLA and show them college life and what it could be like if they studied. Or you could take them to prison for Scared Straight and have a guy pop his glass eyeball out and throw it at him and yell at him, take off your shoes, bitch. Which one is more effective? You know what I'm saying? Because I would get depressed watching happy shows when I was a kid because I would look around at my house and my mom and my situation and I would start feeling bad. But if I watch Sanford and Son or Good Times or something where they had it worse than me, like if they just had a ring doorbell on Felipe's house that I could see into the seven people with the cops banging on the door, then I would have felt better. But I guess it's about your wiring, right?
Justine Bateman
I think so. It sounds like it made you feel gratitude.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, I will watch these shows.
Adam Carolla
Well, not gratitude, but just somebody's got it worse. You know what I mean?
Dr. Drew
I would watch these shows as a little kid going, man, you fucking white chicks are hot.
Adam Carolla
And what would your friends say?
Dr. Drew
All my shows were all white chicks. So I was in love with white women from the day one. Bionic woman. Like, there was never. There were no shows where I could look and go, oh, this Latina girl is hot, or this black girl hot.
Justine Bateman
That's a good point.
Dr. Drew
It was all white chicks, man. I'm married to a white woman. And it was all at the Hotspur. All of them.
Adam Carolla
Who's your number one white chick back then, growing up?
Dr. Drew
Lindsay Wagner.
Adam Carolla
Lindsay Wagner?
Dr. Drew
Yeah, the Veronic woman. Farrah Fawcett. In that poster, you could see, like, her beaver, her bush.
Adam Carolla
Really? I was looking.
Dr. Drew
Nipples, but all right, do Katherine Bach.
Adam Carolla
Oh, Duke's a hazard.
Dr. Drew
Hazard.
Justine Bateman
Heather Locklear.
Dr. Drew
Yep. And that fucking poster. She's, like, hanging out right there with a little towel.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
Oh, man, we used to get all those posts at the carnival.
Adam Carolla
Oh, really?
Justine Bateman
That's kind of messed up. Like, even your, like, love life is whitewashed in this country. Yeah, that's. That's not. That's not right.
Dr. Drew
That was our goal growing up. Making it again.
Adam Carolla
A white chick, you said. Who was the first one you liked before?
Dr. Drew
Lindsey Wagner.
Adam Carolla
Lindsay Wagner.
Dr. Drew
I met her when I was working at Dodger Stadium. I get a Dodger Stadium selling hot dogs, and she was there with her knucklehead sons. They were little. They were like, 12 or 13. They were wearing South Central hats and NWA hats. Really? Yeah. They were wiggers. Yeah. And they were straight up wiggers, bro. And she was telling them, jason, calm down. Wow.
Adam Carolla
Wow. And then there's wiggers, because Lindsay Wagner is the whitest chick on the planet.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. She's married. She's married to. I didn't even know she was married to a stuntman. She's married to a stuntman back then.
Justine Bateman
What's she from? What show?
Adam Carolla
All right, hold on.
Dr. Drew
Woman.
Adam Carolla
Bionic Woman.
Dr. Drew
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
That's a TV show called Bionic Woman.
Dr. Drew
How can you not fall in love with that man?
Justine Bateman
Oh, okay.
Dr. Drew
She ended up married this. This guy that was in the movie Car Wash that wears pig ears. And that guy's a stuntman. And when I saw him, I was like, whoa, wait a minute, man. I had a chance.
Adam Carolla
All right?
Justine Bateman
So hopefully he had a warmer apartment.
Adam Carolla
The Bionic man was popular. And then once that was popular for, like, two seasons, they spun it off and they made the Bionic Woman.
Justine Bateman
See how long it takes for us to get our representation.
Adam Carolla
Two whole seasons of the Bionic Man. And do you know why? How? What? The accident was.
Dr. Drew
Oh, man, I forgot her accident, but I know that. I don't know. She was playing tennis Is this a.
Justine Bateman
Real accident or in the show?
Dr. Drew
In the show.
Adam Carolla
Well, in the show, the way you gotta get bionicized is you need a horrible accident and we have to replace parts.
Dr. Drew
Steve Austin, Lee Majors. He was an astronaut. And when he fell off on his parachute, he lost an eye, an arm.
Adam Carolla
Hold on, hold on. He didn't, you know, he did a crash landing of a Delta wing experimental aircraft.
Justine Bateman
Same thing as a parachute flight.
Adam Carolla
No, Lindsey, I saw it.
Dr. Drew
Black and white, so it looked like a.
Adam Carolla
No, no.
Justine Bateman
Exact same thing.
Adam Carolla
Lindsey. Lindsey Wagner. Parachute didn't open.
Justine Bateman
Oh, see, that sounds like a murder.
Adam Carolla
She did not. Okay, there's a couple things that were funny about.
Dr. Drew
That's her husband right there. Yes.
Justine Bateman
In real life.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. He's a stuntman. And he was. He's. He's in. He's. He's in every movie getting kicked by Steven Seagal and Chuck Norris. Like, he's in over 700 movies getting kicked by white people.
Justine Bateman
But their baby looks like he has all the secrets.
Dr. Drew
That little kid is also a stunt double. A stunt stunt man. But then later on, they got divorced and she ended up marrying the. The president of Chrysler.
Justine Bateman
You really kept up with her.
Dr. Drew
Oh, yeah, man. Let me tell you.
Justine Bateman
I know Felipe really kept up with her.
Adam Carolla
Well, he kept up with her, but he still doesn't know how she was bionicized. I had to tell him that.
Justine Bateman
I mean, he knows every person.
Dr. Drew
Her superpower is kind of stereotypical, you know, like a man wrote her superpowers. So when they give her power, a man said, what does a woman want to do? Oh, this wants to hear everything. So they give her bionic ear.
Justine Bateman
Smart.
Adam Carolla
All right, so let me give you thoughts on the bionic woman. The thing about the bionic woman. Oh, all women have a bionic sense of smell. Every single woman I've ever been with will walk into the room and went.
Justine Bateman
Like, well, you know, that's how we test what's going on.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, I know. No, they know what's going on with the nose.
Justine Bateman
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
I don't know why they have eyes. We know when you're sniff everything out. The bionic woman. Couple things. Her main thing was her ear. She could hear. She had a bionic ear. But here's the comedy about her bionic ear. Her bionic ear could hear somebody talking four miles away in a helicopter. In a helicopter. In hunch shows. But every time in the show, she would take her hair and put it behind her ear, like this wisp of hair was going to get in the way of your Bionic hearing. She'd go, hold on a second. I'm cosmic. What would her hair do?
Justine Bateman
That was telling me, Sicilian, my hair's thick, so you gotta move it.
Dr. Drew
When every time she did that, she was telling me, I was watching it, eating my little bowl of cereal Froot Loops. And then she was telling me, hello. Hello, little man.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, you can find clips of her listening by moving her hair. That meant she was really hearing the.
Dr. Drew
Remember the what? The fanbots.
Adam Carolla
Mmm. A fembots.
Dr. Drew
Fembots.
Adam Carolla
All right. Also, we'll get into them.
Justine Bateman
They sound hot.
Adam Carolla
She later on had a bionic dog.
Dr. Drew
Rat Gino.
Adam Carolla
Was the dog named Gino?
Justine Bateman
Did he not pee in the house? Because that would be great. Or not throw up at 3am I.
Dr. Drew
Forgot about the bionic dog. What was his powers?
Adam Carolla
Well, I don't know, but when I was 9 or 10, I wrote a. I didn't write a joke. But I was like, she is bionic because her parachute didn't open. And then she got a bionic dog too. And I'm like, his shoe didn't open as well.
Justine Bateman
That's so tragic.
Adam Carolla
I was picturing her shoving the dog out of the airplane. I don't know how the dog got bionicized.
Justine Bateman
I wonder if she could hear early when the dog in the middle of the night goes furball.
Adam Carolla
And there were fembots.
Justine Bateman
Was that like her girls?
Adam Carolla
No, she had to do battle with fembots.
Justine Bateman
Oh, okay. They were bad victims.
Dr. Drew
There was this bad guy, this old man who was like the dad from this. Some other show. But if you listen to Stewie from the Family Guy, it's the same voice.
Justine Bateman
Is it the same actor?
Dr. Drew
I don't know.
Adam Carolla
Okay, the Fembots were like the Stepford Wives. Yes, they were like the next evolution of the Stepford Wives, the Fembots.
Justine Bateman
If this is his girl, who was your girl then? Who was your person?
Adam Carolla
Well, I was on to Lindsey Wagner before Felipe was, so.
Justine Bateman
Sounds like you were.
Adam Carolla
He's got Michael. Sounds like I wasn't. What the fuck else do I know? Who knows more about Lindsey Wagner, Bionic Woman than me?
Justine Bateman
You need to do a biography.
Adam Carolla
This fucking Johnny come lately didn't even know how. Why she was bionicized. She got into a pickleball accident. Right, Holmes?
Dr. Drew
I didn't even know how she got.
Adam Carolla
She said tennis.
Dr. Drew
I thought she was in a tennis accident.
Adam Carolla
What? Who gets in a tennis.
Dr. Drew
Playing tennis in the beginning of the.
Adam Carolla
Show, you gotta replace your arm and two legs because you got into a tennis accident.
Justine Bateman
Are we going to brush over your Felipe Esperanza impersonation.
Adam Carolla
How about your pronunciation? Forget about my impersonation. Let's do pronunciation, bro. Let's find a mirror, baby.
Dr. Drew
Conjunct conjunction. What?
Adam Carolla
Function. All right, so Lindsey Wagner, number one.
Dr. Drew
Yes, man.
Adam Carolla
All right, then we move on to Charlie's Angels. But here's where we part ways. Cheryl Ladd.
Dr. Drew
Cheryl Ladd.
Adam Carolla
Yes. Who? I like Cheryl Ladd.
Dr. Drew
Hell, yeah, man. In the beginning of the show, when the show's like half her top and she goes like this with shampoo.
Adam Carolla
Oh, the beginning. Oh, the best. The best. Like four. The best four words you could hear. Like when we were young. It's at the very top of an episode of Charlie's Angels. The guy come in through the speaker, Charlie, and go, angels, pack your bags. We're going to Hawaii. And then I was like, oh, yeah, we're going to Hawaii. Oh, that's gonna be the greatest episode. Bikini on the deck of a yacht.
Dr. Drew
I used to love that show. Everything was set up perfect for those ladies. Like, they're chasing a guy, he jumps on a bicycle and takes off. They're chasing them. There's three bikes ready for them.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Justine Bateman
All different colors to match their personalities.
Adam Carolla
We have a clip of the bionic woman moving her hair. She's listening. Wait. Wait a minute. It's better if we make it look like an accident. This is good tv.
Justine Bateman
Look at that, guys hair.
Adam Carolla
Oh, this is backwards. Oh, wow. Move her wisp of hair. Now she can hear.
Justine Bateman
Lot of saving him.
Adam Carolla
A lot of rock slides back in the day. Lots of rock slides.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, a lot of rock slides.
Adam Carolla
And it's so weird that we brought. So we brought up Stamos.
Justine Bateman
Got us here.
Adam Carolla
Stamos. But you brought up Paprika. Oh, right, right. Which my grandfather called Paprika. Paprika. He's. He's Hungarian, so he gets to pronounce it how he wants because that's where it's from. But brought Paprika. And we also brought up the $6 million, man. And then into the. The Bionic World chick, too.
Dr. Drew
From growing up.
Adam Carolla
Please.
Dr. Drew
It was Shazam and Captain Marvel. There was a. They had a side cartoon, a sideshow called Mighty Isis.
Adam Carolla
Oh, Isis was up there with Shira. Lord of the jungle. All right, this is Saturday morning.
Dr. Drew
Saturday morning.
Adam Carolla
Perfect. I got a Saturday morning trailer to play for you that somebody brought to my attention the other day. Now, the reason I'm tying this in is the Six Million Dollar man fought Bigfoot.
Dr. Drew
Bigfoot.
Adam Carolla
And it made a big deal. Made a Big splash.
Dr. Drew
I'm a giant in costume.
Adam Carolla
It was. Yeah. It captured America's heart. $6 million. So a year later, they came out with bigfoot and wild boar. Yes. Which at daytime morning, Saturday morning tv. Look at this trailer. And Jessie Mae. This is what we had to watch for entertainment.
Justine Bateman
I miss all of that.
Adam Carolla
When we were young.
Justine Bateman
Oh, wow. Yes.
Adam Carolla
Out of the great northwest comes the legendary Bigfoot.
Dr. Drew
Who eight years ago, you're left alone in a living room with a bowl of cereal. That's it. Until he grew up to be Wild Boy.
Justine Bateman
Oh, God, he's teeny shorts.
Adam Carolla
Wow.
Dr. Drew
He's going 60 miles an hour.
Justine Bateman
The graphics are legit.
Adam Carolla
Ray Young is Bigfoot. Joseph Butcher is he journaling? Yvonne Rugolato. A lot of boulders. The 70s were all about the boulders and jumping in slow motion.
Justine Bateman
Bigfoot has a blowout.
Adam Carolla
Oh, yeah.
Justine Bateman
Oh, they're friends.
Dr. Drew
Sid and Marty.
Adam Carolla
Bigfoot is only marginally bigger than Wild Boy, which is kind of weird. Like, Bigfoot would be a tight end and Wild Boy would be a wide receiver. Like, he is a little taller and, like, a little heavier, but not much. Like, shouldn't Bigfoot be a lot bigger than Wild Boy?
Justine Bateman
My perception is Wild boy was big.
Dr. Drew
There was wild Marty Croft. They had all the sexy shows like Electric Woman and Dinah Girl.
Adam Carolla
Oh, that was.
Justine Bateman
I can't remember those names.
Adam Carolla
By the way, the bionic woman's dog was named Max.
Dr. Drew
Max, Not Gino.
Adam Carolla
It was a bionic German shepherd.
Justine Bateman
Why did he become bionicized, as you say? Which I'm questioning it being.
Adam Carolla
Like I said, the chute didn't open, and he landed on a tennis court.
Dr. Drew
And he was beat up by rackets.
Adam Carolla
He was donated to a laboratory to use at four months because he was critically injured in a chemical lab fire, which is weird because his fur was perfect at a time when Dr. Rudy Wells, that's the doctor that put the whole thing together, needed to test his bionic prototype. The bionic implantation procedure cost $1 million. Max had a bionic leg and a bionic jaw. Not what you want in a. In a dog if you're hopping into the yard. But, yeah, there was a bionic dog. There was a bionic man, There was a bionic woman, and then there were fembots. But I can't even remember what the hell the fembots were doing.
Justine Bateman
Some treachery.
Adam Carolla
I. I think they're. They're up to treachery. I think the. I think the problem was there was a lot of coke going around back then, and I Think people get really coked up and then come up with really shitty ideas. And whoever is sitting next to him coked up when. Yeah, yeah. Fembot. No, that's good. Now write that down on the cocktail napkin. We'll go into production on Monday. Everyone did coke. Everyone had horrible ideas. Yeah. And the fembot's face would fall off and. Yeah, it was a fembot.
Justine Bateman
Oh, wow.
Dr. Drew
Austin Powers took the idea for one of his sketches.
Justine Bateman
That's where I remember fembots from. Because this is before. This is repeats. By the time I watched it.
Adam Carolla
They did battle with the. With the bionic one.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. There was this evil doctor and that doctor he caught. He calls him up, he goes, look out the window. I have taken over the weather machine. And it was really. It was really sunny when they looked out the window. And then now look out the window. And then it was like thunder, man. Like tornadoes.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
And they had to go to this island to beat everybody up.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, it was. It was appointment viewing back in the day.
Dr. Drew
It was a three parter.
Adam Carolla
Love Boat, Charlie's Angels, Fantasy Island.
Justine Bateman
You had to wait for it.
Adam Carolla
$6 million. Oh, man. It was all about delayed gratification.
Justine Bateman
Yes. Anticipation. I missed anticipation.
Adam Carolla
It is a problem, I think that is more important than we think it is from a societal standpoint.
Justine Bateman
Delayed gratification.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. So delayed gratification is sort of everything you need to be successful. Like, anybody who was successful showed up. You guys showed up and did open mics for free for a long period of time. And delayed. There was no Tonight Show. There was no paycheck. There was no hobnobbing with Lindsey Wagner. It was all work for free. Wait in line. Some nights you didn't get on. Pay your dues. Delayed gratification. If you ordered something online. Well, not online. If you just ordered something, like through the mail. When I was a kid. To be shipped to your house. Nothing was ever shipped to my house because we were poor. But if you did, it's like allow six to eight weeks for delivery.
Justine Bateman
That's right.
Adam Carolla
Could you imagine?
Justine Bateman
No.
Dr. Drew
Oh, man.
Adam Carolla
Six.
Justine Bateman
Now.
Dr. Drew
I was watching this show called the Hatfield at McCoy's.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
And these two rednecks going at each other. And one of the Hatfields, he ordered a fucking scope for his rifle. He goes. Only took six months.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, it was. It was like four to six weeks for delivery of stuff.
Justine Bateman
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
Six months.
Adam Carolla
You had to wait. Everything was pay your dues and wait and wait. Delayed gratification. That's all. That's all it was. There was no grubhub Chipotle showing up on your doorstep 45 minutes later. It depresses people. It is the foreplay of life, which is nobody wants to do foreplay, but it makes the climax much better. Even though we all want to skip right to the climax and we all want everything right now. But I am telling you, when I was a kid and it was around this time of year, they would start running the Grinch that Stole Christmas and Frosty the Snowman and all the Christmas shit. It was appointment viewing. It was, oh, Sunday night, they're doing the Grinch. They're doing the Grinch on Sunday night. We like. I'd be in the kitchen. You'd hear the thing come on. You'd go running and sliding your little socks, and it was. It was so much better. My kids don't give a fuck about the Grinch who Stole Christmas. They never did because they can get it on their phone in July and it's gone.
Justine Bateman
Don't you think that has something to do, or at least some connection to how you opened today, talking about your realtor, that realtor not having all the information? I think somewhere there's some connection, but yes. Any of the information, yes. Somewhere along the lines, having a lack of delayed gratification creates a lack of desire, of gaining new knowledge, because you don't, you've lost that sort of transactional relationship. You've lost the ability to feel how good it feels to wait for something and earn it.
Adam Carolla
Homework is delayed gratification because homework is like, go home, don't go out, study this material. And you're not having a good time on a Saturday night because you're home studying this textbook. But come Monday, when you do the test, you'll be glad you did. So all the guys I grew up with and the number one thing that separates the losers from the winners is every guy I knew was like, fuck this, we're going out. And then you'd go, you got a test Saturday and you're barely. You're getting a D minus in biology. And they'd go, fuck that. And they would just leave. And then they would fail the class. So the difference between the winners and the losers is delayed gratification. And when you. There's a simple test like, I'm not making any of this shit up, you can tell who the future winners are going to be because you do like an M and M test and you say to a person or say to a kid, you're going to have, you know, five MM's right now and eat them or I'll give you 20 tomorrow. Every guy I went to high school with would have gone, give me that fucking M&M's like now. They wouldn't even heard the second part of the question. They would have been grabbing the M and Ms. From the guy. The delayed gratification people end up being the successful people because that's what it takes. And we don't have that anymore. That's why everyone is fat and miserable. Yeah, and miserable. But fat. Because delayed gratification is. Look, you don't get to eat all you want to eat all the time. Right. You gotta wait till Saturday night when you go out somewhere nice.
Dr. Drew
My mom would tell me to wait. My mom would tell me to wait till the movie to start for the tweet of popcorn. And I say, fuck, daddy. I started eating that shit every time she turned her back.
Adam Carolla
At the theater. At the movie theater with your friend who wanted to fuck that chick before she was killed.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, the necrophilia friend.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, man, don't eat your popcorn. To the movie stars. Don't make my popcorn right now, God damn it.
Adam Carolla
Going to the movies feels like a pretty traumatic experience for you as a young person. You got the one rapist to your right. You got your mom barking out orders to your left, starving.
Dr. Drew
You rats going to the bottom.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. So delayed gratification, Charlie Brown Christmas is.
Dr. Drew
The only thing that would never repeat itself. It would just come out at 8:00 on CBS on Tuesday. Right before Christmas.
Adam Carolla
Yes.
Dr. Drew
And if you missed it, you missed it. That's the only thing. That's the only time. There was no team or whatever thing was called to rewind.
Adam Carolla
Nothing repeated itself. There was the Grinch. There was Charlie Brown and Liver Room.
Dr. Drew
Had to shut the fuck up.
Adam Carolla
That's right.
Dr. Drew
We can't miss anything.
Adam Carolla
That's right. And there would be no such thing as getting up and leaving in the middle of anything. It was just there, fixated, not going anywhere. And so the delayed. So we're living in a time where everything is like, next day delivery, priority delivery, ordering food, showing up to the house, fast food to the house. Everyone needs everything now, quicker. We need it now. And we're now at the point where it's like, I'll find myself sitting in front of the TV and, like, looking at my phone and watching tv. I see people watching movies and looking at their phone while they're watching the movie. It's not good. You're going to have to impose this on yourself, people.
Dr. Drew
It takes discipline we're living in a world where people are sitting down. Everybody's sitting down in the penny slots at the casino, Right. And they're out of money and they're still playing, and they're getting a little gratification every time the thing goes bing, bing. So every time you look at your phone, you're like, oh, I gotta. Like, yeah, that's cool. But you see everybody just sitting down in a penny slot.
Justine Bateman
It's that. And it's even worse because I know for myself, sometimes I think about, when's the last time I did one thing? One thing, not one thing. And look at my phone, not one thing, while doing four other things. That's another part of it is that we are no longer single. Singularly tasking. We're all multitasking all the time.
Adam Carolla
Agreed. And all the stuff. See, the plan was back in the day when they started introducing things like a washing machine versus, you know, going down to the river or just a scrub board or whatever.
Dr. Drew
Wife doing it.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. Though the commercials, when you look at the ads, the early ads for, like.
Dr. Drew
A washing machine, she never talks back.
Adam Carolla
That's right. And a dryer. Just.
Justine Bateman
Felipe, your wife doing it.
Adam Carolla
Wait, do your impersonation flip. All right, you know what?
Dr. Drew
They do it sounds good.
Adam Carolla
I'm Felipe. Esperanza, bro. Okay, so. All right, all right. You know what the commercials were? The commercials were, the washing machine is over there and it's washing the clothes. And the housewife is sitting on the sofa reading a magazine and relaxing because someone else is doing the washing. But that's not what happened. What happened was, is now we got a washing machine. So the housewife is freed up to do another task, not sit around and read a magazine. And that's what's happened to all of us. We thought the technology was going to free us up for leisure. It just freed us up to do another job at the same time. That's what we're experiencing.
Justine Bateman
It's tapped into the worst part of our human nature.
Adam Carolla
Well, I don't know if it's the worst because it's really just. You wanna get stuff done, but at a certain point, you just keep adding stuff on. It's not a bad part. It's just a part that could lead to trouble and divorce.
Dr. Drew
I can turn my washing machine on for my phone now.
Adam Carolla
Oh, you can?
Justine Bateman
That's insane.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, I just realized that today.
Adam Carolla
I don't know.
Justine Bateman
That's just crazy.
Dr. Drew
I didn't know.
Adam Carolla
Do we need that? Do we need, like, a smart refrigerator?
Dr. Drew
They're connected. Like, if I leave my clothes on in the soap and leave and go. Just need somebody to take out. Take it out and put it in and fold it.
Adam Carolla
Let your wife do that. Yeah, man. Come on, come on, come on, fool. Wait, is it foo? Foo. Wait, do we do the L?
Dr. Drew
No, we don't. We won't. We don't. Because stupid Instagram will let me put the L anymore.
Adam Carolla
They won't let you do them.
Dr. Drew
I can't write full, and I can't even write. I was trying to. My friend, I was doing this. He made this stupid cover somewhere, and I went over there. I'm gonna write. This is the Marikon button over here, which is, you know. But I guess Instagram knows what you're trying to say now, because I used to be. This is the gay button right here. Right. But I said it in Spanish, so I had to write the name down as a Jewish name to get away with it. I said, this is the Marty Cohen button over here.
Justine Bateman
Marty Cohen's my lawyer.
Dr. Drew
Because I can't write Marty Cohen. I gotta say Marty Cohen.
Adam Carolla
Oh, good. Did. Did fool take over for homes?
Dr. Drew
I think. Yes, it did, in 1989.
Adam Carolla
So, like, do homes. Do old school homes. And then 1983.
Dr. Drew
What's up, Holmes?
Adam Carolla
Okay, good.
Dr. Drew
Now it's what's up, fool? And then.
Adam Carolla
Right.
Dr. Drew
It's just universal now with all.
Adam Carolla
Holmes got knocked out by Foo.
Dr. Drew
I think Holmes knocked over essay, too.
Adam Carolla
Oh, essay.
Dr. Drew
What's up, essay? But then it was, what's up, homes?
Justine Bateman
This is like.
Dr. Drew
But now it's what's up, fool?
Adam Carolla
All right, let's see if we can get this trifecta put together. Yes, 1970 essay. 1980 homes. 1990, fool. Just put them all together.
Dr. Drew
Whatso pese was like, I guess the old, say, late 70s, early 80s. And then. What's up, homes? And then when, like most, a lot of immigrants from South Central, from Central America, started coming in, we started cutting old food. What's up, puto?
Adam Carolla
All right, let's do all four. Let's string them together. All right? Yeah, just. What's up, sa?
Dr. Drew
What's up, essay?
Adam Carolla
Well, hold on. I don't want to talk over you.
Dr. Drew
Let's get clean. I say like a black guy. Black guy with mad. What's up, sa?
Adam Carolla
Yeah, yeah, do it. Do it in your Chicano what's up essay. Yeah, no, we're going. We're stringing them together. We're putting them all together.
Dr. Drew
What's up, Holmes?
Adam Carolla
Well, start at the beginning.
Dr. Drew
What's up, Puto.
Adam Carolla
No, I think. I think you got put on. You got put flip flop.
Justine Bateman
This is like a course for reverse gentrification.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, yeah. All right, let's put them together. Let's start with the S. No, wait. We start with essay homes, fool. No, no, no, no. Essay homes, puto. Fool. We're full now.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, we're. We're at full now. All right, the full generation.
Adam Carolla
Let's put four of them all together. Let's get it clean. Here we go.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. What's up, Besse? What's up, Holmes? What's up, boo? Yeah, that's it.
Adam Carolla
Or no, you left out, puto.
Dr. Drew
No, that's like extra. That's like.
Adam Carolla
It's not here.
Dr. Drew
It is derogatory if you wanna. If you don't like the guy.
Adam Carolla
All right, all right, well, let's get a clean puto that I can. I can edit in later.
Dr. Drew
All right. What's up, puto?
Adam Carolla
Is that.
Dr. Drew
You know what's funny, man?
Adam Carolla
Is that what Stamos sounded like?
Justine Bateman
Nothing. This feels like a coarse.
Dr. Drew
I have a picture of Stamos and what's his name from Funny Home Videos?
Justine Bateman
Bob Saget.
Dr. Drew
Bob Sage.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, they were best.
Dr. Drew
We did a show at the. I think you were there too. Yeah, it was a K Rock one. The one that for acoustic. Acoustic G, B, Dean.
Adam Carolla
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Justine Bateman
How long ago?
Dr. Drew
Oh, a long time ago.
Adam Carolla
I was like seven. Six. Seven. Seven years backstage at.
Dr. Drew
At the. The Universal Amphitheater.
Adam Carolla
Was it the amphitheater?
Dr. Drew
Yeah, there it is right there.
Adam Carolla
There it is.
Dr. Drew
We're gonna do our own show. It's gonna be called Fool's House.
Justine Bateman
What was Saggett like? Did you.
Dr. Drew
They were good, man. They're. They're room smell like a lot of weed, man.
Justine Bateman
That's fair.
Adam Carolla
We're competing. Is that because you were in it?
Dr. Drew
Yeah, man.
Justine Bateman
It was pluming from your hair.
Adam Carolla
All right, let's take a quick try, right?
Dr. Drew
They're both six two, six one.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, they're talk.
Adam Carolla
Fellas, we'll take a quick break. All right, Pete, come back with more hot puto talk right after this. Hey, I'm Adam Kroll. That's Brad Williams and Jay Leno. Hey, everybody over there. We're doing our third annual comedy fantasy camp. That's going to be January 23rd through the 26th. Right. In Hollywood, California. Where else would it be? These guys are going to be there. Remember, two out of every three comics make it big or one and a half. Do I get paid for this? Please tell me.
Dr. Drew
Get paid for this.
Adam Carolla
Go to comedyfantasycamp.com and get in on the fun. BetterHelp this show is sponsored by BetterHelp. November is all about gratitude. And I'd like to think, let's see, who am I grateful for? Mr. Backus, my sixth grade teacher. He was the only one who was nice to me. Didn't really work. But I love Mr. Backus. So have a little gratitude and be grateful. But you know, we don't thank people enough. Maybe we don't thank ourselves enough. Thank yourself. Be your best self this year. How about that? Get a little therapy. Nothing wrong with that. It's good. You get your head right. The rest will follow. Always been a big fan of therapy. And BetterHelp. Well, it's entirely online, it's convenient and it's flexible. Just fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist. And by the way, you can switch therapists anytime at no additional charge. So get the head right this year with BetterHelp. Right, Dawson.
Jessie Mae Peluso
Let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com Carolla today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp help. H E L P.com Carolla Hey Mondo.
Adam Carolla
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Adam Carolla
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Jessie Mae Peluso
It's time to check Adam's voicemail.
Adam Carolla
Hey, Adam, this is Chris in Tennessee. I just wanted to run this value. I don't like any rock and roll song that has rock and roll in the lyrics. Just throwing it out there. Tell me I'm wrong.
Jessie Mae Peluso
Mahalo. You can leave us a message at 888-634-1744.
Adam Carolla
All right, hold on. Philippe Esparza here. Ralph Barbosa.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, he started car racing, though.
Adam Carolla
Oh, he did?
Dr. Drew
Yeah, he, he, he, he, he. He did well on his tour, and he. I think he bought his grandmother's Toyota and he remodeled it and fixed it up. So he's already fixed up, like, five cars.
Adam Carolla
Hold on. When I hear someone remodel the car, it makes me think they may not be a car expert because you might modify.
Dr. Drew
I'm not a car expert.
Justine Bateman
He added a kitchen sink, a nice backsplash.
Dr. Drew
I'm not a car expert at all.
Adam Carolla
So he remodeled.
Dr. Drew
I'll put water. Grandma's Toyota, like a Supra or something. And then she made it look he like.
Adam Carolla
But he's not racing that.
Dr. Drew
No, he raced last week, actually. He raced in his Camaro.
Justine Bateman
Like drag race?
Adam Carolla
Yes, but he's just doing bracket racing, I think.
Dr. Drew
Was it a racetrack?
Adam Carolla
And it went. But it's a quarter mile. Quarter mile. Like a road?
Dr. Drew
No, not at you.
Adam Carolla
No. All right. But he's doing that kind of racing?
Dr. Drew
Yeah, that kind of racing.
Adam Carolla
Okay.
Justine Bateman
It's nice to know some things like that haven't changed. No, that sort of racing feels like something that's, like, from the past.
Adam Carolla
Oh, the drag race.
Justine Bateman
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
No, still going. That's legal.
Dr. Drew
Right. But there's also illegal. Right. You've been into illegal ones.
Adam Carolla
Like Fast and Furious.
Justine Bateman
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
You've done those when you were a kid. Like.
Adam Carolla
Like street. Street stuff.
Dr. Drew
And Ventura Boulevard. Come on.
Adam Carolla
No, it's Van Eisner.
Dr. Drew
Van Eyes. That was a movie.
Adam Carolla
Yes, there was a. And it was also Mulholland.
Dr. Drew
Mulholland.
Justine Bateman
That seems dangerous.
Adam Carolla
Mulholland was dangerous. People go off the cliff.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, I feel like the cliffs probably.
Adam Carolla
They made a movie about Mulholland racing and they made one about vanity. They used to just make a movie about anything. Like, if this was the 70s, there would be a movie coming out in four months called the Trump Dance. And you go, what the fuck is that? I don't know, but everyone's talking about it. And you'd go, well, why is that a movie? And I go, I don't know. It's just. Everyone knows what it is. So we're doing the Trump Dance. That's what is the movie.
Dr. Drew
The movie.
Adam Carolla
If something got hot, they just made a movie about it. Even if. But it was never enough. You know what, it was like, where's the Beef?
Dr. Drew
Became a movie.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, it was like, you know, it was like Night at the Roxbury. You have a three minute SNL sketch that people think is kind of funny for three minutes. And someone goes, what if we make a two hour version of it? It's like, you don't have enough idea for two hours.
Justine Bateman
That was a lot of fun.
Adam Carolla
Right? So all these little SNL sketches would go, we're making a movie. And it's like, you don't. There's not enough here to make that movie. But that's what we did. If something got hot for 10 seconds, boom.
Dr. Drew
Movie, movie.
Adam Carolla
That's how it worked.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, I remember that.
Adam Carolla
All right.
Dr. Drew
Watch out. The movie. Nobody.
Adam Carolla
You like White Shadow?
Dr. Drew
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Adam Carolla
You like all the Whities, don't you?
Dr. Drew
Hell, yeah.
Justine Bateman
He loved him. He's excited.
Dr. Drew
White Shadow was a movie about a basketball team in South Central.
Adam Carolla
Well, there's White Shadow, the TV series.
Dr. Drew
Yeah, that's it, right? Coach Reeves.
Adam Carolla
All right, so Paprika.
Justine Bateman
Paprika or Paprika.
Dr. Drew
Paprika.
Justine Bateman
Your Hungarian granddad.
Adam Carolla
Yes. Now, Paprika is the American version and Paprika is the Hungarian version, but I think it's pretty much in Hungary, they put paprika on everything. And it's good because it's not that spicy, but it gives it a little extra flavor. And the story and the reason I wrote that down is because I got into a philosophical argument with everyone online about me and my taste and things. You know what I'm saying? And what people do is they go, look, it's subjective. I may like this and you may like that, but it doesn't mean this isn't better than that. It's a personal taste thing. And then I always argue with people because I go, I like cars. And you may like, you know, a 1980s Kei car, but it's a piece of shit. And a Ferrari is nicer looking. And it's not just because I say it is. It's because it is. Like we all know, we know comedians that aren't that funny. We know comedians that are funny. And it's not just your opinion. We have to have some rules here. There's some people that are funnier than others. Architecture. Shitty 60s Valley architecture with a flat roof and aluminum windows. Strip mall shit is ugly. Then there's stuff from the twenties and stuff Craftsman houses from the teens in Pasadena. It's not just my opinion. It's better. This is what I'm saying.
Dr. Drew
The new Astro Burger design.
Adam Carolla
And the new Astro Burger.
Dr. Drew
The Astro Burger design. Not on architecture too. He'd like a renowned architecture for Los Angeles. He designed the LAX and the Astro Burger restaurant. They're very spacey.
Adam Carolla
Like did not know that. Yeah, I think it's like a standard.
Justine Bateman
You're speaking about a standard standard.
Adam Carolla
I'm saying we can agree that certain eras were better for architecture, whereas the 70s and the 80s were bad era for architecture. And if. And you like some bad 70s architecture, that's on you. It's still better to have the stuff from the 20s and the 30s. That's all I'm saying. I feel like music is that way. I feel like comedy is that way. All art is that way. But people want to go. It's in the eye, the beholder. And all I'm saying is I'm right. And the reason I'm getting back to paprikash here. I grew up with a Hungarian grandfather named Laszlo Gorok.
Dr. Drew
Laszlo, what's up?
Justine Bateman
Sounds like a Disney.
Adam Carolla
Wait, call him fool.
Dr. Drew
Laszlo, what's up, Fool? From Hungary, Zazak Gabor.
Adam Carolla
He made chicken paprikash. And he made chicken paprikash with these greatest thing in the world called no kettle, which are These sort of dumpling noodle things that we'd make fresh. And then you take the sauce, take a big plate of these noodle dumplings. They're dumplings. And you ladle the sauce and the chicken over top. And it was fucking awesome. Awesome. But now, I grew up with it, but I was like, this is awesome. And then every human being I met after that, that nobody had ever tried chicken paprikash because they didn't serve it in any restaurants. There was no Hungarian restaurants, and no one had ever heard of it. Have you guys had chicken paprikash?
Justine Bateman
Never heard of it, Right?
Adam Carolla
Never heard of it. Never. Whatever. So I would then say to everybody, you gotta try. We're gonna make this. And I had my nanny, who's from Guatemala, I would say to her, look, I got the recipe for chicken paprikashe could cook, but she never cooked chicken paprikash. And she made chicken paprikash. And my kids, who I wouldn't call them finicky, but if they don't like something, they'll tell you they're not going along for the ride just to make Daddy happy. And same with Olga the nanny. Same with everyone in my family. And I made him the chicken paparazzi. And they all went, oh, this is fucking awesome. And they want more of it, and they ask her to make it. And every time I come across in a Hungarian restaurant, which is only when you travel, you got to go to, like, Cleveland or something. Yeah, you got to go to Hungary to find a Hungarian. Then I eat out of Carl's Jr. When I go to Budapest. You have to. You have to go. I don't know, you have to go to, like, Cincinnati or something. Los Angeles is nothing but sushi and bizarrely, Indian food, which is weird. Tons of Indian food and tons of sushi, but there's no German food and there's no Hungarian food. There's none of that kind of European fare. But every time we go, I force everyone to order the chicken paprikash, and they love it. So here's my point.
Dr. Drew
Sound like chicken dumplings.
Justine Bateman
Yeah, they do sound like dumplings.
Adam Carolla
We'll show. There's a picture probably of chicken paprikash over no kettle. And you guys see, you make. You make the dumplings, but you don't form them by hand. You grate them over a pot of boiling water and they come out. I can't explain it. It is amazing. But the point is this. Yes, I think it tastes good, but also it does taste good because it's exotic and weird and no one else has tried it. And every time I tell someone to try it, they fucking love it. So there is such a thing as having taste.
Dr. Drew
All right, that was good.
Adam Carolla
That is exact. Now we need the no kettle E, which they call that. My grandfather called it no kettle. And you. You ladle that stuff over the, I don't know, no kettle dumplings, I guess you would put in there. You make you. I wish I could. My. My mouth is watering.
Justine Bateman
Mine is, too.
Adam Carolla
And I just had a little pre come in my underpants.
Justine Bateman
Oh, geez.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. Yeah.
Justine Bateman
Is that part of the recipe? Yikes.
Adam Carolla
You know what?
Justine Bateman
I'm back now.
Adam Carolla
Some people use. Some people use sour cream. I Lazlo Gorock.
Dr. Drew
That's funny you say that. Pre come when I was in rehab.
Justine Bateman
Not this drawing up a memory.
Dr. Drew
I was in rehab, man, forever. And, like, there was Bible, and I couldn't masturbate. And then we saw this movie called Ferngali.
Adam Carolla
No, I love Ferngali. Hold on. You couldn't masturbate?
Dr. Drew
We dream about that girl in Ferngali.
Justine Bateman
The fairy.
Adam Carolla
You couldn't masturbate. Where is this picture? There's so much happening that we're asking for.
Justine Bateman
Pre come. Really took us for a turn.
Adam Carolla
Oh.
Justine Bateman
Oh, my gosh. That looks so good.
Dr. Drew
And the pasta at the bottom.
Adam Carolla
It's not pasta. It's like dumplings. Like, you can find one without the sauce, maybe, or something like that. But it's so goddamn good. But here's my point, okay?
Justine Bateman
Get to your point.
Adam Carolla
The point is, you can have taste. You can have good taste, and you can have taste where people. I like the Jayhawks as a band. Nobody knows who they are. And I like chicken paprikash. Nobody's heard of chicken paprikash, but when I tell you the Jayhawks are good, and I tell you chicken paprikash is good, well, then it's good. And that's what I'm saying. And I'm saying it's not all subjective. You happen to like fucking Maneater by Hall of Notes. It's a shit song. And that's because you're dumb. That's what I'm saying.
Justine Bateman
But every person says this about what they like.
Adam Carolla
That's true.
Justine Bateman
If other people don't like it.
Adam Carolla
Yes, they do.
Justine Bateman
In that world. In your world. And I mean, it looks like. It looks delicious. You're right. You're right.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. Everyone likes what they like. Some people like American cheese more than cheddar cheese. They just like it better but it makes them dumb or makes them incorrect.
Justine Bateman
I do like that argument because it makes it fun and it makes you be so dedicated to your liking of something.
Adam Carolla
Well, and also otherwise if you go and look, you know, I mean, I don't want to throw people under the bus, but you know, you go, bill Burr's a real funny stand up.
Justine Bateman
I'm kidding.
Adam Carolla
Maybe one of the guys from the blue collar comedy tour isn't as funny as Bill Burr. And then you have somebody in the room and they just cancel out your vote by going, I luck the get her done guy. Now you're canceled out. I'm saying we have to have standards. We have to understand. Otherwise it's helter skelter.
Dr. Drew
Here's your sign.
Justine Bateman
It's hard to have standards.
Adam Carolla
That's right. All right, let me give some plugs out. I'm gonna be in Houston at the Arena Theater doing stand up with Craig Shoemaker and kayvon. That'll be December 6th. And then Phoenix, Arizona Hilton, Phoenix, Tapatio. Oh, you love that tapatio, don't you? That'll be Tapatio Cliffs. I'll be doing stand up there with shoemaker on the December 7th as well. I hear it's a really cool resort. Felipe is going to be traveling. He's going to be in using a passport. Yeah, using a passport.
Justine Bateman
Amsterdam.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Dr. Drew
And going to London, Dublin, England and Amsterdam.
Adam Carolla
And you can go to felipesworld.com and.
Dr. Drew
Is that K. Von the homie blonde guy I know?
Adam Carolla
That's Kayvon.
Dr. Drew
Yeah. What's up, Kayvon?
Adam Carolla
Well, call him fool.
Dr. Drew
What's up, fool? I told him bro, that my friends, my Mexican friends call me cabron.
Adam Carolla
Jesse Palooza's got dates. Most importantly Funny Bone, Omaha, Nebraska. Coming up, November 22nd and 23rd. And we'll do that. See, I'm looking for a resume here. Who's coming up? Ah, Justine Bateman is coming in here and I'll talk to her one on one right after this. Well, it's that time of year again. You're thinking about those holiday meals. It's upon us. And I have the perfect hack to make them delicious and stress free. It's meter smart. Wireless meat thermometer. You leave it in the meat while it's cooking, then you'll get notifications on your phone when it's ready. Skip all the guesswork. I use it all the time. We've all been there. Checking the turkey a million times. Get black lung from opening the oven a million times. Wasting tons of time overcooked prime rib? No. It's a guessing game and Meter's taking the guesswork out of it. With cloud service, you can have limitless range so you can cook, put the meat in, go on a beer run, go in and watch the game, Make a pie. It's easy. Mash up some potatoes, grab a cocktail, enjoy yourself. Don't just hover over the oven, over the barbecue. And it works on all different cooking forms and all different proteins. Get them the gift they'll actually use this year. A stress free life for the cook at home. It's Meter. Right?
Jessie Mae Peluso
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Felipe Esparza
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Adam Carolla
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Dawson
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Justine Bateman
Working from home. That means you're also eating from home. We suggest stocking your fridge and pantry with fruits and veggies so you always have a healthy snack within reach. This healthy suggestion is brought to you by Regents Blue Cross Blue Shield of Oregon. Together we health.
Jessie Mae Peluso
The Adam Carolla show presents Justine Bateman's birthday cocktail party for February 19th. Let's find out who's here. Here's the mathematician and astronomer who theorized that planets revolve around the sun. Nicholas Copernicus. Let's welcome American actor Lee Marvin, the founder of Swatch. Nicholas Hayek is here. Smokey Robinson joined the party. The guy who sang Lightning Strikes, Lou Christie is here. Please welcome Russian composer Alexander Tchaikovsky. Here's one of the kings of heavy metal, Black Sabbath guitarist Tony Iommi. Actor Jeff Daniels is here. Here's NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. Singer Seal is here. Benicio Del Toro joined the party. And the weird chick from Stranger Things, Millie Bobby Brown. Justine Bateman is on the Adam Carolla Show.
Adam Carolla
Justine Bateman in the studio. Good to see you.
Brad Williams
Hey, I did not know about Tchaikovsky sharing my birthday. That is, I am enriched now you have an eclectic.
Adam Carolla
What you want is a well Rounded party. You don't want to all be from the world of sports or acting or philosophy or something. You want a broad range and you want some names. And yours is up there.
Brad Williams
How is yours? Is yours in good shape?
Adam Carolla
The best I can tell the most famous person on my list is Todd Bridges from Facts of Life. So mine could leave something to be desired. I will say this. When you're the most famous person on your list, that's not a good list.
Brad Williams
Gotcha.
Adam Carolla
I don't know what my list is. It's not strong. If I'm the most famous person on my list, then I shouldn't have a list. That's the way I would look at it.
Brad Williams
You gotta adopt some other birthday.
Adam Carolla
So it's good to see you. It's great. I like you out there speaking your mind and sharing your world and your truth with everybody. And it's kind of a weird renaissance, I guess. I don't know what you could call this period in our history.
Brad Williams
Well, to me it is like something has and it's broader than just Trump winning the election. That's a component of it, but it's a larger. It's a wider spiritual shift that has sort of been delayed for many, many years for various reasons. So we're going to see changes. I mean, obviously you see the team that Trump is putting together, there's going to be big changes, structural changes in the government, dissolving departments and things like that, but then we're going to see changes that are as fundamental in the arts and medicine and philosophy and all of that too.
Adam Carolla
You'd think it will trickle down, for lack of a better term to affect. Because I think the average person would say, well, look, it's going to affect corporate taxes and it's going to affect some transportation, something like nut and bolt stuff. You know, maybe we'll get some automation at the harbor or something like that. But arts, they don't really talk about.
Brad Williams
Yeah, I'm not, I'm not talking. It's not a trickle down thing. Imagine something much larger, something that God's doing.
Adam Carolla
Mm.
Brad Williams
And the fact that Trump won and is shifting things, that's one component of this bigger event.
Adam Carolla
Mm.
Brad Williams
So it's, it's not that things will trickle down from that election. That election was a demonstration of the scales tipping to releasing this larger change in the world.
Adam Carolla
I'm generally positive about it now. I live in Hollywood and I know a lot of people that are devastated by it. You may have. Well, look, look, your brother's pretty progressive. I was Just at Jimmy Kimmel's house three days ago, first birthday. And I think people have this thing, and I don't know exactly how you do it, but people say, oh, how can you talk to that guy anymore? Or how can he talk to you? And I go, well, Jimmy's my friend, and he's a good person and he's a decent person. I see how he conducts his life. So when his birthday happens, I get invited, and then I go to his house and I hang around with his mom, Joan, and his dad Jim, and his brother John and his sister Jill, all with the J's. Wait a minute.
Brad Williams
Huh?
Adam Carolla
You have. Do you have that?
Brad Williams
I have that with one sibling, yeah.
Adam Carolla
Oh, but you didn't pick a theme.
Brad Williams
No, I have. Yeah, I have. There are other letters in the family, not just the J, because you could.
Adam Carolla
Have been one of those. Jimmy Jay family.
Brad Williams
It's true. But I feel the same way about, like, you know, my friends who I. The way my friends voted is of no significance to me whatsoever. It's not even on the list of reasons I would or would not be friends with somebody.
Adam Carolla
No, I agree. I think May 27th, by the way, Louis Gossett Jr. That's my birthday. Andre 3000. Lisa, left eye Lopes or Lopez? Is it Lopez? Yeah. Okay. Henry Kissinger. There you go. Jamie Oliver, the Naked Chef. It's not your list. You have a much more desirable list.
Brad Williams
Do you have anyone from classical music in there, like I do?
Adam Carolla
Alas, no. Not that I'm aware of, no. Unless Henry Kissinger played some Mozart, I don't know. But look, yes, you don't care and I don't care, but they oftentimes and historically in the past have cared, and that's been an issue. It'd be nice if they didn't care and you didn't care, and then you just get on with your life. But in the past, lots of people, especially in Hollywood, care a lot.
Brad Williams
Yeah. And maybe they. I mean, I'm just. You have to ask them. But maybe they care. Because the idea of that balance being threatened, of the collection of people that think one way or the other threatens their own identity or sense of self that they've attached to, aligning themselves to this list of kind of woke themes or beliefs or something.
Adam Carolla
I think for me, things either work or they don't work, or they're either effective or they're ineffective. And I would be down with all of their stuff if it felt effective to me or if I had any proof or history. Like, if defunding the police turned out to be a great idea. Then I would go, yeah, well, I was wrong. Good. Or an open border, whatever it is we're talking about. The problem is it doesn't seem to work. And so I'm not against it because I'm against you or the individual who came up with the idea or who supported the idea. I think the idea is bad. I think the idea of dogs at an airport is bad. I'm not against dogs and I'm not against dog owners. But when you start getting notes from your doctor that says you have anxiety when you're 27 year old, perfectly healthy woman, so you gotta bring your two dogs on my flight, then now I'm against it. And then you can go, oh, so you don't like me? And it's like, no, I think it's a bad policy and I don't want to travel with dogs. And it begats more dogs. There were no dogs at the airport. Now it's a goddamn kennel because everyone's traveling with their dogs. And I don't like it. But I just think it's bad policy. I'm not really against you or even the person that looked the other way or made the policy.
Brad Williams
Yeah, I'm the same way. I don't care if an idea came from. I mean, I'm a film director, you know, so if I have an objective in a scene and the prop master has an idea that makes that objective more cute, I'm all for it.
Adam Carolla
Yes.
Brad Williams
So I am the same way. It is the results. So in politics, I don't care if an idea comes from a Democrat or Republican or an Independent or. It makes no difference to me whatsoever. And as you, I just want to look at the results. And, you know, you can look at something like Gavin Newsom, bad result. I don't care what party he's in, that person's decisions have been bad, have resulted in bad things for California. And that's why I wish he had been recalled. And I hope he never gets anywhere near any kind of presidential nomination.
Adam Carolla
I am 100% with you. I don't know that there's anyone who hates Gavin Newsom more than me. It could be, I don't know, maybe Dave Rubin hates Gavin Newsom more than me. But I really hate Gavin Newsom. And I hate him because he's sort of everything that's wrong with California and humans, really. It's like he gets voted for for all the wrong reasons because he looks like he knows what he's doing. It's all just Vaseline on the teeth bullshit, used RV salesman. Nothing ever comes out the other end and all. I mean, he sat where you're sitting 10 years ago and told me homeless, the homeless situation was his number one priority. That was 10 years ago. He sat where you sat and I told him what the problem was with homeless. And he told me I was wrong. And it was. I told him it was drugs and mental issues. And he told me it was a mother of two who got divorced and was down on her luck and worked a full time job for minimum wage. And I told him he was wrong and he just stormed ahead and ruined the city. You've lived here for how long?
Brad Williams
Yeah, I've lived here for most of my life. So yeah, I've really seen California and Los Angeles in particular change and same thing. There's just a lot of policies that are, I think we knew were ill advised when they put into effect. And then we see the results and we go, okay, the replacement of Gascon with Nathan Hockman is a perfect example for the Los Angeles da. Gascoigne had some ideas he wanted to implement and he did, and they had a very bad result. And so I'm glad we had an opportunity to vote that out and say, we don't like it. Bring someone else in.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, but again, just bad ideas that won't work. And they mostly rely on some component to humans that don't exist. They rely on humans being sort of decent, semi righteous and they will do the right thing nine out of ten times versus weak and opportunistic. So if you go. And also they have a kind of an ass backwards reverse engineering of life that I keep screaming mostly to Dr. Drew about, which is it doesn't work just because they do a sort of reverse engineering on it. And I'll explain. So if you go, we have a problem. What is the problem? Well, there are too many kids of color that aren't testing well enough in math at the, at the high school level. How do we fix this problem? I would go, well, we need to spend more time with them on math and maybe bring in some tutors or figure out something they would say, why don't we just lower the score threshold for black and brown kids and then that'll fix the problem. All right, that is not fixing a problem. That is just re engineering a problem, but not fixing the problem. And if you go, well, the problem is there's too many people of color in prison and a lot of them are there for shoplifting. Well, I Got an idea. Why don't we just raise the amount? You can steal up to 850 bucks before it becomes a felony while making a misdemeanor. And you go, okay, that doesn't fix the problem. It just has people steal more shit and stop at 849 bucks. And if you go, well, what's the problem? Well, the problem is it's essentially. It was so funny. I don't know why I have this so clearly in my head, but when I was kid, I was watching Sherman and Peabody, the cartoon, and there was a part where they were in a car race and they were being beaten and the car wouldn't go any faster, and it was going like 40 miles an hour. And the other car was. And they couldn't catch the other car. And they go, won't go any faster. And so one of the characters broke the glass on the speedometer and turned the needle up to 100 miles an hour, and somehow it worked. But I'm like, that's what they do. They go, well, just. It's like saying you're morbidly obese. Well, get a scale that reads lower.
Brad Williams
Yeah. Or you have in your mind someone you want to have a relationship with, and the person that you're with doesn't have any of those qualities. So you just throw that list out and decide that you're going to have a different set of desires. And then you're never happy because those aren't your true desires or something isn't adhering to the rules. So then you just change the rules.
Adam Carolla
Yes.
Brad Williams
Yeah. I think the same way, especially about school. If I was black, I would feel so insulted that they felt that they needed to lower the requirements for college admissions in order to accom. I mean, if I was black, I'd just be like, are you implying. Because you are implying that if your skin is darker, your brain doesn't work. Right. Which is ridiculous. So I think the scenario that you said, you know, if at middle school level we're not seeing the scores that, you know, the kids aren't learning the math and English composition that we have at other schools, then I think they don't want to do the things that take more time and effort. Like what if you had a required course at every university where the students that had been admitted have to go to the local middle schools, like a service class. And you have to get enough hours of tutoring these kids in the basics of what's on that SAT test, pre, you know, algebra and pre calc, and teach them how to do it instead of saying, that's okay, you don't need to know how to do it. We'll just let you into the school anyway. And then while you're at the school, you feel suicidal because you can't do the work, we're going to tell the professors to lower the requirements, and then we'll hand you a diploma.
Adam Carolla
Well, it's also unintended consequences, because when you take a person, let's say a person of color, and you put them into a higher education situation, Stanford or Yale or Brown or some Ivy League where the curriculum is real high, but you falsely sort of inflate them to put them in a place that they probably hadn't earned their way in, they flame out and get discouraged because they can't keep. But look, it would have been the same with me if you would have shoved me at Yale. I would have flamed out in the first quarter because I wasn't up to the task. But if they went to a state school, you know, Cal State Northridge or something like that, that was more commensurate with their ability, then they would stay in and complete the four years.
Brad Williams
Yeah. And what about people who did qualify and did get good SAT scores and all this, who happened to have darker skin? And then what kind of shadow are you putting on them as if they didn't earn it and aren't prepared for the worst? I think a terrible way to do it. It puts the people that, like you said, haven't done the work yet to get there at a disadvantage. And then it's extremely disrespectful of those who have put in that work. And I just don't feel that you can. You're not. It's. What body you're dropped into is not of your doing, but your character, the effort you put in, the decisions you make, that's who you are, and that's how you should be judged. Not by your gender, your height, your weight, your color. It's just all a ridiculous way of deciding who someone is.
Adam Carolla
Agreed. By the way, there were no notable composers born on May 27, so. But Todd Bridges wasn't on there. Or was he? Or do I keep putting Todd Bridges on my list?
Brad Williams
You want him to be on your list?
Adam Carolla
I do. I do. I swear. I keep saying he's on there, but every time we pull the list, what is his birthday?
Brad Williams
What is Todd's birthday?
Adam Carolla
You know what?
Jessie Mae Peluso
Todd Bridges is on there.
Brad Williams
Okay.
Adam Carolla
He's not on my list, though. I mean, not on the list that you guys Gave me. But he's there.
Jessie Mae Peluso
No, those are all musicians.
Adam Carolla
But.
Jessie Mae Peluso
Yes.
Adam Carolla
No, no. I mean, you gave me an initial list. Lesson with. With everybody. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I didn't do that.
Jessie Mae Peluso
Yeah, okay.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, okay. So. All right. Anyway. Todd Bridges. We share a birthday.
Brad Williams
It's still.
Adam Carolla
He's still there, but he never reaches out to me. But I don't reach out to him either, so.
Brad Williams
Well, Todd.
Adam Carolla
Streaming.
Brad Williams
Listening.
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Adam Carolla
You were. Well, God was. You were in that era. You were after that era. Right. The different strokes.
Brad Williams
I started in the business back then, and it's interesting how it's all changed so dramatically since then. So. So now what I'm doing is. I don't know, there's so many different ways to make TV series, if you will. It sure is different than it was then. Yeah, I mean, back then, too, you had, like. There was only three channels. You didn't have a choice, really.
Adam Carolla
How old were you when you came out here? You're from back east, right?
Brad Williams
Yeah, back East. I was 11.
Adam Carolla
11. And I don't know, there's a pejorative to stage mom or showbiz parents or something, but your parents had to have some idea that this is what you wanted to do because you were 11, right?
Brad Williams
Yeah, no, I just kind of fell into it. But it definitely was my calling for the time. And then things shifted later. Acting ended for me, and then it was instead writing and directing and producing, which I was really glad about. Really glad about. So I'm done a couple of books and a few films, and we're doing a film festival, too.
Adam Carolla
Oh. Founder and festival director of the Credo 23.
Brad Williams
Credo 23 Film Festival. Yeah.
Adam Carolla
And that is taking place.
Brad Williams
It's gonna be at the American legion Hall, post 43 on Highland.
Adam Carolla
Oh, there.
Brad Williams
It's. What a. You've been in there? Yeah. It's so beautiful.
Adam Carolla
It's beautiful. It's like. I don't know. I. God, I've been to events there before. It's really old school. I must be from the 20s or something that built the cannons and stuff out front.
Brad Williams
They redid their theater. It's like 460 seats.
Adam Carolla
Oh, really?
Brad Williams
Stunning. Yeah. Cause I had been to a lot of events there, but hadn't been. And then I went to a screen, and then I got an invitation for a screening there. And I was like, where do they do screening? I don't know where they would put a screen because I'd never stepped into the theater. And I walked in, I was like, what? I had no idea it was back there.
Adam Carolla
And you accept films into the festival.
Brad Williams
We're taking submission still through, you know, submit through Film Freeway, or you go to credo23filmfest.com and yeah, until December 20th. And you cannot have used any generative AI. This is a non AI film festival.
Adam Carolla
Oh, to have. We need that now, I guess.
Brad Williams
Well, here's the thing with used in what way?
Adam Carolla
I'm so. Well, in any way for writing or for any visual.
Brad Williams
Can't use it for writing. Can't use. No, you just have to make a film. Like, it's like, you know, like, we've been making films for 100 years. You just have to make a film.
Adam Carolla
How do you test for it? I mean, how would you know?
Brad Williams
No, we just, you know, you take your word.
Adam Carolla
Their word.
Brad Williams
Yeah. You have to have the, you know, I mean, just don't use it. If you're using it, Submit to some other festival. I mean, there's plenty of them.
Adam Carolla
Is it used quite frequently now?
Brad Williams
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
For writing?
Brad Williams
I think so. I think people are using it a lot. And I mean, to me, like, if you're a filmmaker, if you think you're a filmmaker and you're using it, you're not a filmmaker. Because to use it means you are eliminating parts of the process that get you to that goal. And I don't know, to me, like, I so love writing and directing and producing that to remove any parts of those process, like research for writing. If you're doing a period film, like a period script, you know, part of the writing process is that research. Like, it. As I'm researching, I'm coming up with things that. Not just behaviors and clothing choices and whatever that were of that period, but it's helping me put the story together. So I just. I don't, you know, that's what people have said. Like, oh, why don't you just let up, you know, ChatGPT or whatever, some, you know, AI program. Do things like, research. And I'm like. Because that is, I would be ripping myself off, I would be removing something I enjoy doing and I would, I just, I. It doesn't make any sense to me. It's like having them do part of your relationship with someone you like spending time with. Like, why would I want to give that up?
Adam Carolla
I don't want to be a naysayer, but bring it. Well, I've never used, I'm. I'm the least tech savvy person on the planet. And I write, I make notes on like napkins and stuff. I literally, I have a pen and I make notes on pieces of paper in my car constantly. So I'm old school and I'm not proud of it. I just don't know how to do the other stuff. So I've never used any AI anything. But if I were arguing, I'd say, well, a lot of people said that about the calculator. Like, you're not supposed to use a calculator in the 80s to help you do math. And I sort of have feelings about that as well. I don't even. Like, my son did math in his head really well, but not really on paper because it didn't work. He just did it in his head. But I do math in my head very fast and very well, but I wouldn't be able to show my work like on paper. And I think it should be encouraged to do math in your head. Sure. But on the other hand, I would say, well, this guy uses a calculator, my accountant uses a calculator, and it's a good thing, it's an aid to what he does. So is that an example or could that be an example to AI in the writing process?
Brad Williams
Well, I think what's helpful, I think there are a lot of people who don't understand what generative AI is. And if you think of like a blender, you know, if you turn a blender on and you try to pour it out into a glass, you'll get nothing. Right. So generative AI in simplified to just simplify it is, is it's an algorithm with weights and probability and all of this. And it's trying to figure out what to do. And the only way it can function is if you feed it. If you feed it, if you want to have it spit out a book, you have to feed it in hundreds, thousands, millions of books into the blender and then you give it a prompt and it'll churn it all up and say, you want a book about Hong Kong and Panda bears and bicycles or something. Provided you've put that information in there about those items, it will give you a Frankenstein spoonful of that.
Adam Carolla
And is it. I guess, you know, it'll get better. But I happen to like music from the past, even though I have no composers born on my birthday, so sadly. But I like stuff because I can hear the instrument and I go. And I like it a little bit rough around the edges, like some of the stuff from the 60s, Motown stuff, where you can tell everyone's in the room doing it at the same time. And then I hear Drake, and I don't like it, but it's not because I'm old. It's just because it doesn't feel. It feels too synthesized to me. It just doesn't feel like what it was. And I guess that's maybe where we're at with AI at this point. Some people might like it, but it doesn't have a authentic feel. Or can you pull it off?
Brad Williams
I mean, it sounds like you're describing visceral knowledge of another human having made something for you.
Adam Carolla
Yes.
Brad Williams
You know, with the music. Right. I feel the same way when I look at art, when I see something, you know, fine art in a museum or a gallery, especially art that looks like you need almost a maniacal sort of level of effort in order because it's very detailed. And you imagine the time somebody put into putting this piece together so that you could see it versus a piece of AI art in a museum. I just. I think it's an anathema of moving forward, first of all, because you're regurgitating the past. It's not a tool as much as it's a. And, you know, regular, like, basic AI, like Waze and things like that, or CHESS program. That is different from what I'm talking about, which is generative AI, where you're actually getting it to do it for you. You're. You're saying, write me a script or write my email or write this or write that. And it's. First of all, it's theft because you had to feed in all these things, and that was done without permission. And then you are capitulating your life, really, in different ways. You're not even participating in, you know, expressing yourself anymore. I mean, there's a lot of ways it's going to kind of crush people's spirit and make them feel worthless because of that.
Adam Carolla
Are you planning on staying here in Los Angeles and kind of riding it out, or are you going to be amongst the people that flee?
Brad Williams
I was so much looking for an off ramp. So much so. But I tell you what, with Hochman coming in as the new DA of la, and I'm seeing some changes and then with Trump winning, and again, it's not so much about Trump or him as a person or anything like that. It's just that enough people in the United States, you know, in response to the results of all these woke policies and decisions, just said, ah, enough, and stop. So. Because a lot of people, like, I didn't know you were so in love with Trump. And I'm like, you're just. It's like, like broaden your vision of what is going on in life. That election was not about that. That election was about the, you know, over 300 million people in the United States. I mean, not all of them are voters. I understand, but it's about this entire country saying, stop it, stop it. This is all ridiculous. The fact that we can't say. And that's ended the whole mob mentality momentum that was necessary in order to destroy people's careers because they don't agree with you. That was enough people saying, we're not going along with this anymore. And it ended that.
Adam Carolla
Well, we got Hotchman, which is good, and we got Gaston out, which are Gascon out, which is good. But I just heard yesterday that the LA City Council, I think, voted unanimously to declare this a sanctuary city.
Brad Williams
But wasn't LA already?
Adam Carolla
I think we were. And we're gonna, we, la, are gonna do battle with Trump because we don't want any of his policies drifting in to Los Angeles. So the rest of the world or the rest of the nation will get Trump, but we're gonna battle him. But I never know. I assume most everything is just symbolic all the time. And also being a sanctuary city is, to me, what is wrong with every one of their ideas, which is being a sanctuary city is in concept or in principle could be okay. It'd be like saying, we're a mass unit, we've set up tents, we have equipment, we have nurses, we have surgeons, we have life saving, we have equipment, we have plasma. Like, we're ready to go if people come in here with horrific injuries. But when you say, when LA says we're a sanctuary city, we don't have a tent, we don't have doctors, we don't have equipment, we don't have anything, we just go, we're mass units unit. And then at some point, bodies start coming in and we go, whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you want us to do with these bodies? And then we go ship them off somewhere like we didn't even know what's going on. New York announced, you know, hey, where's sanctuary city? People start showing up and they're like, what? What's going on? We don't know. Every city that announced they were a sanctuary city. First off, you would be right if you were Texas or Florida or anywhere else to ship migrants to a sanctuary city, because they have announced, we will welcome these people to our town. So if you lived in Texas, you were like, well, I didn't announce we're a sanctuary city. Let's take these people and ship them to New York, where they announced they were sanctuary city or Chicago or Los Angeles. And then, of course, they have no plan in place.
Brad Williams
That's a good point. Nothing in place.
Adam Carolla
Nothing in place. Which is if they did have something in place, then I would go, okay, we just. I have a clip, by the way. I have two good clips you're going to enjoy. I have the mayor of Chicago, Brandon, can't remember his last name, very progressive, and he's announcing we're doing battle with any Trump plans of shipping people out. But he, because he's a race hustler, always adds black to whatever. Whatever it is he's talking about.
Brad Williams
Race hustler.
Adam Carolla
Well, he is.
Brad Williams
I mean, listen to him. Let's see what he.
Adam Carolla
Brandon Jefferson, President elect, former President Trump. His threat is not just towards new arrivals and undocumented families. His threats are also against black families. We're going to stand, we're going to protect undocumented individuals, we're going to protect black folks, brown folks, Asian folks. The city of Chicago will be better.
Dr. Drew
Stronger and safer, despite who's in the White House.
Adam Carolla
All right, well, I'm not sure what his plan, Trump's plan is for black people, and they call them new arrivals, which is great. AOC called them undocumented Americans. So it's like Americans who lost their paperwork. But new arrival. Sounds like he just stepped off a cruise ship. Not you walked here from Guatemala. But he weaves black into everything, which is always funny to me because it's like Trump never talks about black. He talks about people that are here illegally.
Brad Williams
But he's regardless.
Adam Carolla
He's basically saying he's gonna show up, start cleaning up illegal aliens. And if he sees some black people along the way, we'll just round them up as well, which is insane. It's also some kind of weird drug that they can't get off of. Like the racism stuff or the Hitlerian stuff, like just Give it up. Would you just give it up and get back to some policies and then go ahead and talk about policy because. Because no one is buying the whole Hitlerian racist thing that you guys essentially ran on.
Brad Williams
Yeah, but I think it's. It's kind of like if you want to be accepted by a certain group, you have your hair a particular way, your clothes a particular way, you go to particular grocery stores to shop, you drive a particular kind of car and you feel like you are part of.
Adam Carolla
Yes.
Brad Williams
And I think for a lot of these people, the way they speak, the theories they claim to hold, and. Yes. The stores they shop at and the clothes they wear and all of this. And I think there's a real fear of not. Of not only not being a part of that anymore, but of that not existing anymore. And I think it's really tied to their own identity, feeling of safety and being part of. And I think it's tied into all that.
Adam Carolla
I don't even know if they know what they're saying anymore. Well, how would a bunch. Okay, okay. They ran on this. They've said it for years, like, we're stronger with the immigrants. Like, they do more. They're more honest, they work harder, whatever it is.
Brad Williams
But then it's different than just immigrants.
Adam Carolla
Well, they always fudge.
Brad Williams
I know. That was it.
Adam Carolla
We're a nation of immigrants. My father came here from Italy. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not. That's. No one's ever talking about that. We're talking about people here illegally, and some of them are criminals. And so they always talk about, like, we're stronger and they work harder and they do less crime and so on and so forth, which you could sort of look at with a jaundice eye and kind of go, hmm, it sounds counterintuitive that people come here who can't speak the language are net benefit to us. But we had little experiments. Now, many showed up in Chicago, in Atlanta, in New York. And as soon as they showed up, the mayor was like, we don't have the money or the facilities to deal with these people. And then they started saying, hey, kids, I know you had a basketball game planned for this weekend, but we need the auditorium to house these people. And then the locals got pissed off. One of them, the guy who killed Lake and Riley, who was the nursing student who was just jogging. It's an insane story. She's just a. I don't know, 23 year old nursing students in Atlanta was just jogging and an illegal person who was a criminal just Jumped there and caved her skull in and killed her. That guy was staying at the Roosevelt in New York and then requested a flight to Atlanta. He's here completely illegally, and we're aware of it, but under the program, caught a flight from New York that we paid for to Atlanta, set up in Atlanta, and just randomly killed this nursing student who was jogging. So I don't think that's a good plan. I feel like everyone needs to be vetted. And the part where this is a nation of immigrants, I agree with. I spoke about my stepfather, Laszlo Gorog, who fled Nazi Hungary, where Nazi Germany was taking over hungary in, like, 39, 40, 41. He saw which way the wind was blowing, and he fled. And then he came here, and he came here legally, and he did the documentation and everything. And he came here and he contributed, and that's good. And then I got goulash and everything and chicken paprikash, and I liked it, and it was fine. And that's what we do. We're fine. That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about floods of people coming over that we don't know what their past is. We don't know what their criminal history is. And that's what we're talking about, not rounding up people that look different than us and dragging them back to who knows where.
Brad Williams
And the unfortunate thing about these announcements, it's. You know, there was a time where if you were homeless and you were camping out on the side of the road and stuff, they would come and take your stuff. And, you know, years ago, and that was in place for a long time. And then those rules changed. And what that did was kind of send out the bat signal to all the homeless in, you know, in neighboring states to come on over because everything's going to be fine. And. And then it developed into, we'll actually give you a tent and we'll give you drugs and we'll give you a porta potty. And then we saw clean needles in Los Angeles. We saw the, like, especially under the freeways, just jammed full of. It was hard to get your car through 4ft tall of just stuff and tents and porta potties. And then also, you know, you mentioned earlier about if you steal under $1,000 in Los Angeles, don't worry, we're not going to arrest you. Well, what happened? People were coming in from all. It was just basically saying, we're just going to hand you anything. And listen, I think we'd be pretty challenged to spend $1,000. Either one of us in any of our visits to the grocery store or the drugstore.
Adam Carolla
Yes. Okay.
Brad Williams
So that means everything you need can be done for under $1,000 per day. By the way, this isn't like $1,000 in your lifetime. And so what happened is people came in from different countries, other states, to just come in and get their stuff and then leave with it all.
Adam Carolla
Well, the drug cartels. The cartels got involved, and it started getting homeless people to do the stealing and then bring the stuff. And they'd give them a shopping list like, we need acid reflux, you know, pills.
Brad Williams
And that's what is gonna happen here with this.
Adam Carolla
Well, it's dogs at the airport. When you announce you're a sanctuary city, then people are attracted to your city. They're not going to Waco, Texas, where they've not hung out the. Well, put out the welcome map for you. It creates more. It attracts more. That's how it works, sadly, but that's how it works, and we don't seem to understand that. And, yes, there's some alarming statistic that three quarters of the homeless in Los Angeles are not from Los Angeles. They were attracted because we made a more hospitable environment for them to be home.
Brad Williams
We offered benefits.
Adam Carolla
We offered incentives for them to move here. We did with homeless what Atlanta and New Mexico do with production.
Brad Williams
Yeah. Trying to solicit the business.
Adam Carolla
They went. It's a better. We have a better environment to shoot films in Atlanta, and we'll give you tax breaks. And so everyone in Los Angeles picked up and went there. And then we did that with homeless. We said, you know what? We're gonna make it that much better for you to be homeless if you come to Los Angeles. And so we attracted people to Los Angeles, and we traded out the industry for homeless people.
Brad Williams
Well, maybe that. And maybe that supports another industry, which is the nonprofits that benefit the homeless. I don't know, but it's sure. You know, if you're ever confused about what's going on in your city, just look at where the money's going.
Adam Carolla
It is 24 billion spent in California. And homeless. More homeless as a result. I have another great clip because I love these clips.
Brad Williams
Great.
Adam Carolla
I love the era. The word salad era. We're in the politicians. This is why Kamala Harris, thank God, did not get voted in, because she was like a seat at the table. And everyone has to be treated with dignity. And I dream of some world. They have some sort of utopian world in their head, but they have no plan. You know what I mean? They go, there's a hate, a hate free and a gun free zone. And you go, good, until someone with a gun full of hate shows up and now we're fucked.
Brad Williams
And they didn't get your memo, right?
Adam Carolla
How about you get a cop with a gun and have him stand by the door? No, no. Hate free, gun free. Yes.
Brad Williams
That defend your position, right? Yes.
Adam Carolla
That's this daydream of some world where everybody lives and lives with respect. This is so. It's a Texas representative, her name is Sylvia Garcia. And a reporter is like, look, if you're claiming your district is going to be a sanctuary city, what do you do with aliens who may be criminals in your. In your district? What are we going to do? What's the plan? You say you're not deporting anyone, right? What about criminals who make harm people in your district? Here's her answer. It's going to cost a lot of money.
Brad Williams
Estimates say 88 billion. 88 billion to just process and deport 1 million people. Do the math.
Adam Carolla
How is he going to pay for it?
Justine Bateman
What do you want to happen then to the millions of people that are here?
Adam Carolla
Do you support people who are here.
Justine Bateman
Illegally that have committed crimes in the past few years? Do you support them being deported?
Adam Carolla
I support treating all of God's children with dignity and respect.
Justine Bateman
Even criminals.
Brad Williams
Dignity and respect.
Adam Carolla
All right, well, problem solved. You just treat the criminals with dignity and respect.
Brad Williams
It's like what a third grader would kind of put together. Like how to run a city, you know, we're gonna put it together and don't worry about putting any sewer system underneath it or. You know what I mean? It's just. It's silly.
Adam Carolla
It's all pabulum. Like, we're all God's children, okay? Hitler, Jeffrey Dahmer. We're all Todd Bridges. We're all God's children, okay?
Brad Williams
But in order to have a society, you have to arrest people like Jeffrey Dahmer.
Adam Carolla
You.
Dr. Drew
How about we treat.
Adam Carolla
Treat him with dignity and respect?
Brad Williams
How about no? How about you kill enough people and the answer is no?
Adam Carolla
Well, how about somebody who rapes a woman who's jogging and then caves her skull in? Maybe he doesn't deserve due respect.
Brad Williams
Maybe he doesn't deserve his penis anymore. Why don't we just cut that off so that he can't hurt anyone else.
Adam Carolla
With it or his hands too? Her solution is everyone needs dignity and respect, which I.
Brad Williams
Well, then you have absolute chaos. And one has to wonder, is that the Goal.
Adam Carolla
I ask this question quite a bit because it seems incomprehensible that that is the goal. Sort of bedlam, nihilism, chaos. But if all of the paths seem to lead that direction, at a certain point you go, maybe that's the goal. And then you go, but to what end? Or why? I mean, I'll give you an example. They have a lot of stuff like road diets in California. They go, we're gonna take this lane. Instead of two lanes, we're gonna have this lane set aside for bicycles. But nobody's on a bicycle commuting to work. And now we're all bottlenecking in the lane and whatever. And I say to everyone all the time, all this stuff, it's not gonna speed things up. It's not gonna make traffic more efficient. It's slow. Someone will go, that's the plan. And you go, that's the plan. And they go, yeah, they want you out of your car. They don't want you commuting across town in your car. They want you to own no car.
Brad Williams
Is this a segue to Gavin Newsom's $1 a gallon gas price?
Adam Carolla
It could very well be one of those. You keep going, what's going on? And you go, I think they want you out of your car and they want you living in a multi unit building and sort of walking everywhere. The communities are kind of. They have an idea of not going anywhere. And I don't think they want you to own a car. And then you go, oh, come on. And you go, well, he's making gas six bucks a gallon. They're putting the roads on road diets. And he said he's going to outlaw internal combustion engines by the year 2030 or whatever it is. And you go, well, maybe that is his plan. He keeps talking about, like the people that are crazed environment, environmentalists. Is their plan help the environment, or is their plan something else that they're not saying?
Brad Williams
One of the indications that, you know, helping the environment is not their plan. Where are they right now when it comes like generative AI? Do you know how much water and how much energy it takes to spit out some, you know, bedtime story for your kid from Chatgpt? Insane. And yet where are they?
Adam Carolla
Well, they're flying private to Davos.
Brad Williams
Well, it's a bit of more than a little bit of disingenuousness. So I think what we've seen with, you know, what happened, you know, November 5th is enough adults saying, all right, this little. This little plan you had, like you've been saying had a bad result. We're not doing it anymore. It just sort of. I feel like it showed that there are a lot of people in the United States that are saying, the adults are here now. We're not doing this anymore. Stop it.
Adam Carolla
Well, ultimately, we are pragmatic. Like, not the representative who needed to treat illegal criminals with dignity and respect, but the average American looks at that tape and goes, no, no. If you have an illegal who's committing crime in your community, you have to detain them, you have to incarcerate them, and you have to ultimately deport them. I mean, that's how. That's a basic, pragmatic thought, right? And at the end of the day, I think Americans are pragmatic sort of at their core. They may have notions, sort of pie in the sky notions, but where the rubber meets the road. They want their kids to go to a good school. They want safety. They don't want homelessness. They don't want corruption. They don't want an open border. They want the pragmat. They want lower taxes. They want lower grocery bills. They want lower gas bills. They have a pie in the sky about the environment. But when it costs them 150 bucks to fill up their SUV, they want drill, baby, drill. And so what happened is the Prague pragmatists sort of won, but it's only because they got to a saturation level before that. We were sort of, okay, all right. Okay, all right. And then it got to steak is twice as much as it used to be, and gas is five bucks a gallon.
Brad Williams
Adam. I will say I think it was more than okay, all right. I think it was the result of a lot of emotional terrorism.
Adam Carolla
Oh, yes.
Brad Williams
Threatening to, like, destroy your career, dox you, destroy your children's lives at their school. If you disagree with someone, if you dare to express something that's not in this accepted list of woke positions, that to me, I, you know, and I said earlier on Twitter, like, this has been the most un American moment that I have known in my life.
Adam Carolla
No, I totally agree. Ironically, the thing that we went nuts about is all the people that went nuts about McCarthyism in this town were practicing McCarthyism in real time, 100%.
Brad Williams
And anyone who is not familiar, this was the blacklisting of the 1950s, where HUAC and Senator McCarthy conducted these hearings. And they demanded that all these writers and filmmakers say whether or not they are communists or whether they've ever been to a Communist meeting and to name names. And some of them just said, I'm not doing it. I'm not going to play this game. This is ridiculous. This is outrageous. And those people were not permitted to work in the entertainment business anymore. So there is a very serious history of that. And it's a major mark on this industry. And that this industry would participate. And that, again, is stunning.
Adam Carolla
Well, thoughts? First off, the folks that are at the tip of the spear that never stopped crying about that McCarthyism era and how horrible it was are the first ones to want you canceled for not getting vaccinated or wearing a mask or wearing a MAGA hat or whatever. They're all about it, which is insane to me because it's so hypocritical. But also, and this isn't a popular opinion, but everyone here is talking about Russian collusion and Putin and Putin being a death merchant and this Communism was evil and it did cause a lot of death and destruction and despair. So on paper, being against communism was actually not a bad idea. Now, prosecuting innocent people without the judicial process is not right, but at least communism was bad and is bad. Not getting vaccinated is not bad or good. It's none of your fucking business. There's nobody caused anybody any pain or serous or disease by not wearing a mask outdoors and or voting for this candidate versus that candidate. So at least the people behind McCarthyism had an actual evil to deal with, even though they went about it the wrong way versus you people who are doing the same thing they did against something that's not evil. It's just a different choice. So it makes them worse.
Brad Williams
Yeah, like I just heard that Stan Sebastian, the actor had an invitation to be in the Variety varieties, one on one, actors on actors, but they couldn't find another actor to come on it with him because it would have been a discussion of his performance of Donald Trump or in the film where he. I forget. I think maybe it's called the Apprentice where he's playing Donald Trump. So they couldn't find anyone who would come on and talk to him about the performance. It's not that San Sebastian is Donald Trump, but that he portrayed him in.
Adam Carolla
A film in a negative way. So I hear.
Brad Williams
I just, you know, Stan Sebastian's an outstanding actor. You're not going to come on a show with him and discuss a role he played.
Adam Carolla
There are so many bizarre, stupid things that are so. They're so beyond. Like the guy from Mumford and Sons who was kicked out of the band for saying that Andy Ngo, who wrote the book on Antifa, had courage. And the people in the Band heard that, he just tweeted that the guy took balls to write this book and they threw him out of the band.
Brad Williams
And how long had that band been together? Like, that's, you know, of all the lines you can draw, that was it. That was the one I remember.
Adam Carolla
I have these little, like, snapshots. I wrote her name down. Shelly Luther was a woman who owned a salon in Texas. So this is a single female small business owner who employs other females to work at her salon, who complied with all the distance and the regulation and the six foot separation or something. But at some point, they shut her down altogether. Like no business altogether. And she defied them and she was in prison. She had to go to jail for a week or something like that. But the point is, she showed up as a guest on the View and all the women from the View, who are all about empowering women and small businesses owned by women and strong women, yelled at her for opening her salon and defying the man and the orders. And I'm like, first off, you bitches, you're all getting paid. They're still. They're on getting paid, and this person's not getting paid and not paying their employees. And they think she's the problem.
Brad Williams
This seems like a S and M show or something. I mean, that they. I'm hearing repeatedly of people being on the View and being berated. Like, you're. I don't understand the purpose of going on a show that's going to treat you rudely and yell at you. I don't know. I don't really understand it.
Adam Carolla
Well, I think they have people they agree with, like Kamala, who they. Ironically. I don't know that there's any one incident you can point to, to any candidate where it didn't go the way they wanted it to go. But certainly a large part of it is, ironically, they had Kamala on and they were all gonna be sunshine and smoke up the ass. But at some point, her biggest fan, Sunny Hostin, said to her, what would you do differently than Biden?
Justine Bateman
That was it.
Adam Carolla
And she was like, I wouldn't do anything differently. And then Sunny was like, I'm gonna help you out and ask you that again. Like, anything. You sure? It's sort of. It's sort of. Sometimes people will help you in the position of authority. Like, sometimes you check the car. Like, so I remember once I was like registering my car at the dmv and the guy was like, it's going to cost a lot. Unless it was inoperable. Was it inoperable And I was like, yeah, it'd be better. And he goes, it'd be a lot cheaper. And I. Oh, yeah, it was inoperable. Like, the guy was helping me.
Brad Williams
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
Sonny was trying to help Kamala, and Kamala just said nothing different. And then everyone took that clip and ran with it because we all decided we didn't want Biden for another four years. So why do we want someone who agrees with all his policies? But the way the view works is they have that, and then they have the people on they're gonna do battle with.
Brad Williams
And do these people know before they come on that this is going to be a battle?
Adam Carolla
If they didn't, they should fire their publicist, because when Judge Janine from Fox and Friends shows up, it's gonna be a donnybrook.
Brad Williams
I imagine she knows, but, you know, someone who owns a hair salon may. May not know.
Adam Carolla
That's a good. That's a very good point. This is, you know, this is the view circa 2020 or 21. They weren't as weaponized as they are now. And she probably thought, yeah, I'm an independent female business owner, and I'm probably going to get praised for my stance against the man who's trying to shut my business down. So she may have gone on their show. And also she's a Texas salon owner. She's probably. She's not as savvy as a sort of New York, you know, someone who worked in media. So she probably showed up with some sense of fair treatment. And I don't, you know, they didn't scream at her or anything, but they were also Covid up that they had to, of course, not take her side in her defiance. And then she went. She was incarcerated, man. I know. And people seem to want to kind of turn the page and move forward or go, hey, we need a little more of this. And I'm like, you took a person who kept their business open and you incarcerated them. The government did you, who are worried about government overreach all the time and totalitarian leanings and stuff. What about that?
Brad Williams
I think it was the revenge of the hall monitors.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Brad Williams
It was really like, I know I'm not gonna get invited to the party, and I'm not gonna have any fun, so I'm gonna make sure there are no parties whatsoever.
Adam Carolla
Yeah. It was very. It was interesting to see how people reacted, and it scared me. And it was a tell. I mean, it was.
Brad Williams
Yeah.
Adam Carolla
Gavin Newsom, to me, was a tell. Like, oh, you like this stuff, don't you?
Brad Williams
Oh, wait, has he ever. And I'll answer it, no. Has he ever had a time in his life where people were tuning in to hear what he had to say? Remember, he was doing these, like, fireside. There are few people doing these sort of fireside nightly. Like, they wanted to be Adam Carolla, they wanted to have their own show. You know what I mean?
Adam Carolla
Kevin Newsom wanted to be Adam Carolla.
Brad Williams
But you know what I mean? They wanted to do this daily show where everybody tunes in and watches them talk about whatever. And that's what they had.
Adam Carolla
They loved it.
Brad Williams
And then it went. And so don't. I mean, it's easy to see then his motivation for keeping it going, you know, California was shut down, in Los Angeles in particular, longer than, I think, any other place on the planet.
Adam Carolla
Yeah.
Brad Williams
Because, you know, as soon as he lets go of that, he has to go back to, like, I don't know, dealing with the trash department or the. You know, maybe there's a problem over in one of the school districts or, you know, he has to go do all those jobs.
Adam Carolla
Right.
Brad Williams
Mundane, instead of being watched on his little show every day.
Adam Carolla
Here's an interesting delineation, perhaps, and maybe it's just going to sound flattering to me, but I figure there are two kinds of people that want to get into politics. I would like to think, if I got into politics, is because I want to fix some stuff, and there's waste and things that frustrate me, and I would like to enact something others like the idea of being in charge. And Gavin Newsom doesn't strike me as a guy who wants to fix stuff, but he does enjoy being in charge, because when Covid came out, that showed who he was, and all the mayors and all the governors who loved being in charge really came out. And it's kind of tantamount to. I would like. And you can tell me how you vibe on this. I like being in charge of myself and being independent and creatively sort of doing what I want. But I don't like being the boss. I don't like telling people what to do. You know, like when somebody goes, this guy's been late three days in a row. You gotta talk to him. I go, that was a good voice. It's uncomfortable now. Other people like being the boss. You know what I mean? Like, I worked with Jimmy. Jimmy likes being the boss in a good way, but he likes. He likes being the boss. I didn't like being the boss, but I wanted to do what I wanted to do, and I wanted autonomy, and that makes you de facto the boss. Sometimes you're not working for somebody else, so you want all this stuff, but you're only boss. And I like politicians who want to do things and want to fix things and want to make things work, but I don't want ones that want to be the boss. And Gavin Newsom looked like someone who wanted to be the boss during COVID Yeah.
Brad Williams
Yeah. And a lot of. A lot of politicians, I feel like, behave in the same way that some celebrities do who are. Who feel like they're losing their grip on their own fame, so they'll do something that they know will get attention to keep themselves, keep their name involved in the conversation. And I feel like we have some politicians on this side of the nation that engage in that a lot. And it's like, why? Why are you doing that? That sounds so nonsensical. Oh, I see. It's because. I mean, look how often we've mentioned his name in this particular episode.
Adam Carolla
It's true. I'll do it in my sleep sometimes. Of having a nightmare, wake up covered with sweat, panting hard like a Vietnam vet who hurt a helicopter. Yeah. And so, to be fair, I think a guy like Trump wants to be the boss and wants to fix things. Like, I think there's such a thing as both.
Brad Williams
Well, I mean, if we just look at the results. I'm very, very interested in seeing what this many of the people in his cabinet are gonna do. I'm very interested to see what RFK is gonna do. I am too interested. Or RFK Jr. I'm very interested to see what Tulsi Gabbard's gonna do. I'm very interested to see what Vance is gonna do. I mean, I think this is a really interesting group of people, Vivek.
Adam Carolla
I've interviewed most all these people, and Musk.
Brad Williams
I mean, Musk.
Adam Carolla
I know.
Brad Williams
I just feel like I am. Like, this is. I'm so grateful that one of the most successful businessmen in the history of the world, really, you could argue, is willing to help get rid of inefficiencies. And I'm like, how is that bad?
Adam Carolla
I don't know why we're arguing with it. And I will tell anyone over at cnn, when you guys start doing, this guy has no experience in government. I get a boner. But you think you're. Think that's a strike? I don't know. Experience in government's the problem. I'd rather have Elon Musk. I'd rather have somebody outside, somebody who built an Empire outside of government. You know who has experience in government? Joe Biden. He has 50 years experience. 51, 53 years experience in government. That's all he knows. He's never been in the private sector. That's why he's a shit show. It's only government.
Brad Williams
And if you're looking to get rid of inefficiencies, why not? People say he's just a billionaire or a trillionaire, whatever he is right now. And I'm like, that's an indication that there are efficiencies at his companies that are very expensive to run. The fact that he actually has a lot of money, don't you think? Just do the math. And I think I'm excited to see what they're going to do. So I really, I can't wait.
Dr. Drew
I can't wait.
Adam Carolla
I can't wait either.
Brad Williams
And, and in other areas too. Like I said, it's not just what's happening in government. A lot of things are going to be changing in a lot of different parts of our society. And I'm, I've been waiting a long time for this and I'm really excited.
Adam Carolla
Well, a good note to go out on Justine, the Credo 23 film festival, accepting submissions up until 20 December AI not apply. Someone had to make a jingle out of it. And that'll be coming up. And it'll be at the really interesting Legion.
Brad Williams
American Legion, American legion Hall, post 43 on Thailand in LA in March. And passes are for sale right now, too, if you want to get some early.
Adam Carolla
Yeah, right down the street from the Hollywood bowl, right?
Brad Williams
That's right.
Adam Carolla
That's right. Justine, always good to see you. Come back anytime. And we'll come back for an update closer to the film festival. Oh, great idea. Me and Oxnard at Levity Live doing standup. That'll be November 29th, and then Houston and then Phoenix. You can go to ampgirl.com for all the live shows. Until next time, sign for Justine Bateman, Philippe Esparza and Jesse May Paloo saying.
Jessie Mae Peluso
Mahala, you can leave us a voicemail at 888-634-1744 and get your tickets to see the Ace man. Get them now@adam corolla.com.
Felipe Esparza
Pluto TV is a place for movie fans like me and TV fans like me. They've got something for everyone and it's free. I love free. And I love Jersey Shore. For me, it's the Godfather, SpongeBob SquarePants. I am Patrick. Patrick is me. Oh, Forrest Gump. Come on, Criminal Minds solving crime after bedtime. Whatever you love to watch. Pluto TV makes it easy with thousands of free movies and shows. Pluto TV stream now pay never. I love reality TV on Pluto tv.
Adam Carolla
Same.
Felipe Esparza
And I love that it's free. It gives me the freedom to watch Bravo's Real Housewives Vault channel. I'm totally free to watch Bad Girls Club. I'm free for Jersey Shore love and hip hop. I'm free all day. Survivor. I'm free all night. With hundreds of free reality shows. You totally free to watch what you Love on Pluto TV. Pluto TV stream now pay never.
Justine Bateman
Oh, oh, oh.
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Adam Carolla Show: Comedians Felipe Esparza & Jessimae Peluso + Filmmaker/Author Justine Bateman
Release Date: November 21, 2024
In this lively episode of the Adam Carolla Show, host Adam Carolla welcomes back the talented comedians Felipe Esparza and Jessimae Peluso, alongside special guest Justine Bateman, an acclaimed actor, author, and filmmaker. The episode promises a mix of humor, insightful discussions, and candid rants as the trio delves into various societal and political topics.
Adam Carolla kicks off the conversation by expressing his frustration over what he perceives as a widespread lack of essential knowledge among professionals. He cites examples from real estate and healthcare to illustrate his point.
Adam Carolla: "What's going on, people? Are we getting dumb? Are we getting lazy?" [05:05]
He recounts an experience with a realtor who couldn't recall fundamental details about a $7.6 million property without consulting a sheet, highlighting a lack of preparedness and knowledge.
Justine Bateman echoes this sentiment, particularly emphasizing the importance of professionals like doctors having in-depth knowledge about their specialties.
Justine Bateman: "If a doctor doesn't know something about the specific body part they specialize in, that would bother me more and make me more worried." [05:17]
Dr. Drew adds to the conversation by sharing an anecdote about a blood draw performed by an ex-gang member, underscoring how some professionals attain competence through unconventional means.
The discussion shifts to a nostalgic examination of classic television shows from the '70s and '80s, such as The Bionic Woman and The Six Million Dollar Man. Adam delves into the humorous aspects of these shows, particularly the portrayal of superhuman abilities and their practical implications.
Adam Carolla: "Her bionic ear could hear somebody talking four miles away in a helicopter, but every time in the show, she would take her hair and put it behind her ear, undermining her very ability." [27:10]
The guests reminisce about the anticipation associated with Saturday morning cartoons and how the serialized nature of these shows fostered delayed gratification in viewers, contrasting it with today's instant-access entertainment.
Adam Carolla passionately argues the importance of delayed gratification as a cornerstone of personal success and societal stability. He contrasts this with the current trend towards seeking immediate rewards, which he believes leads to various societal issues.
Adam Carolla: "Delayed gratification is sort of everything you need to be successful." [36:42]
Justine Bateman and Dr. Drew support his viewpoint, discussing how the shift towards instant gratification has eroded discipline and focus, contributing to problems like obesity and general dissatisfaction.
Dr. Drew: "We're living in a world where people can't wait and want everything now, which impacts their mental and physical well-being." [42:11]
The conversation takes a critical turn towards modern political ideologies, specifically targeting woke culture and drawing parallels to the McCarthyism era of the 1950s. Adam contends that current cancel culture mimics the blacklisting tactics of McCarthyism but targets non-ideological issues like COVID protocols.
Adam Carolla: "The folks that are at the tip of the spear that never stopped crying about that McCarthyism era are the first ones to want you canceled." [117:03]
Brad Williams reinforces this analogy, emphasizing the dangers of judging ideas based on their origin rather than their effectiveness.
Brad Williams: "We have to judge ideas on their results, not on whether they come from a Democrat or Republican." [119:57]
They delve into immigration policies, critiquing sanctuary city designations and questioning the practicality and safety of such policies without proper vetting.
A significant portion of the discussion focuses on the advent of Generative AI and its implications for creative fields like writing and filmmaking. Adam expresses skepticism about the authenticity and quality of AI-generated content, comparing it unfavorably to human creativity.
Adam Carolla: "You can have taste, but AI doesn't have an authentic feel. Can you pull it off?" [63:43]
Brad Williams likens generative AI to a blender, arguing that without human input and creativity, AI outputs lack depth and originality.
Brad Williams: "Generative AI is just an algorithm with probabilities. It lacks the visceral human touch that true creativity requires." [99:35]
They debate whether AI can ever truly replicate the nuanced creativity of humans and discuss the ethical implications of using AI in creative processes.
As the episode nears its end, Adam Carolla and his guests promote upcoming events, including Adam's stand-up tour and Justine Bateman's Credo 23 Film Festival. They encourage listeners to support these events and engage with their respective projects.
Adam Carolla on delayed gratification: "Delayed gratification is sort of everything you need to be successful." [36:42]
Justine Bateman on professional incompetence: "If a doctor doesn't know something about the specific body part they specialize in, that would bother me more and make me more worried." [05:17]
Dr. Drew on unconventional professional paths: "He knew how to do everything without ever going to school for it." [07:05]
Adam Carolla on modern politics: "Delayed gratification is why we don't have that anymore. That's why everyone is fat and miserable." [40:24]
Brad Williams on McCarthyism analogy: "This has been the most un-American moment that I have known in my life." [121:58]
This episode of the Adam Carolla Show offers a blend of humor and critical analysis as Adam and his guests navigate through topics like societal knowledge decline, the importance of delayed gratification, political ideologies, and the rise of generative AI. Their candid discussions emphasize a longing for traditional values and a pragmatic approach to modern challenges, all while engaging listeners with relatable anecdotes and sharp insights.